Sadly, No!

Wingnut websites have always been a fertile field for advertisers who want to prey on the particularly idiotic. World Net Daily is a veritable cornucopia of ads for get-rich-quick schemes or how to get-buff-fast without weights, diets or exercise. This, of course, is why we can deduce that most wingnuts are fat and poor and […]

Shorter Rep. Steve King, The Poor Man’s America’s Shittiest Website™ Rep. Steve King Slams Norquist Over Attacks on Immigration Son los Miller.* ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

Well, I’m shocked, shocked to discover that greater Wingnutistan has latched on to the Boston bombings as an opportunity to find their favorite liberal bogeymen hiding behind the explosions. Who would have thought? Of course, you don’t have to be the fastest shooting wingnut in the butthurt corral to point your fingers at immigrants and […]

ABOVE: David French Shorter David French, America’s Shittiest Website™ Libertines, Leftists, and Libertarians The gays are responsible for our national debt crisis. A reader recently complained to the WaPo ombudsman that the WaPo was too nice to gays, that it even included stories about gay people (gasp!) dating. Instead, the reader whined, the WaPo should […]

Shorter The Editurds America’s Shittiest Website “Tailgunner Ted?” Just because Democrats are unhappy that Ted Cruz smeared Chuck Hagel as the Mullahchurian Candidate, doesn’t mean Cruz is McCarthyite. We knew and loved Joe McCarthy. Ted Cruz is no Joe McCarthy. ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of […]

Shorter Rich Lowry, America’s Shittiest Website™ Thanksgiving Dumbed Down You know, I was reading Obama’s Thanksgiving Proclamation and I wondered: Do Muslims even do Thanksgiving? I suppose it comes as no surprise that Mr. Starburst a/k/a Rich Lowry isn’t up to any good when he wanders over to WhiteHouse.gov to read Obama’s Thanksgiving Proclamation.  And […]

ABOVE: It’s Not Over Until The K-Lo Sings Shorter K-Lo, America’s Shittiest Website™ Assisted Suicide and Where We Are The bad news is that the baby killer is in the White House, but the good news is that terminally ill people in Massachusetts will continue to suffer. ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected […]

ABOVE: Kevin D. Williamson, truly a man’s man! Shorter Kevin D. Williamson, America’s Shittiest Website™ Like A Boss Romney should be President because his only offspring are male, unlike that fag Obama who has sperm that smells like Chanel No. 5 and can only sire daughters.

Shorter Victorophon Davidoros Hyanseninthosocles, America’s Shittiest Website™: Justice Roberts — Tragic Figure It is better for a Supreme Court Justice to be a partisan hack than to be someone who pays attention to public opinion. ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

ABOVE: Uncle Tom Sowell Tom Sowell, America’s Shittiest Website™ A Political Glossary Hungry people are just fat people who are too lazy to work. When I was young and had to walk to work backwards and barefoot and through the snow, I was hungry and I didn’t ask Joe DiMaggio to buy me a hamburger. […]