Marc Lynch writes:

I was surprised at the consensus on our panel yesterday… about where Iraq was heading: towards a warlord state, along a Basra model, with power devolved to local militias, gangs, tribes, and power-brokers, with a purely nominal central state.

I was talking to a friend about this the other day. He understandably laughed at me because I said that the best-case scenario for Iraq is that it turns into Somalia. In other words, an anarchistic mess of warlords who secure their might and wealth through hired militias.

Now, that’s a terrible, terrible thing. But compared to just about every other option there is (becoming an American colonial state, getting a Bush-appointed strong man to run it, being taken over by Iran) it’s really not too too bad.

Have I mentioned that our government should really be doing more to help Iraqis get the hell out of Iraq? No? Well, it should. (COUGH! DEMOCRATS! MAKE BUSH VETO IT! MAKE HIM LOOK STUPID! COUGH!)
 

Gavin adds:

Selections from the Norton Anthology of Iraqi Bear and Puma Poetry:

The bear weeps for his country’s shame
His axle’s squeaky: who’s to blame?
‘Tis YOU! Yanks like Michelles and Michaels
Care NOT for ursine unicycles!
–Righteous Bubba

There once was a blogger named Mark
Whose support for the Surge was quite stark
“Thanks to Bush,” he declared
But we know it’s the bears
And the pumas that patrol after dark
–J—

Bears and Pumas arrived in Iraq
Just as things were looking black
As they ate al Quaeda, hope began to flicker
So go get another bumper sticker!
–Mikey

Bears and Pumas stalk the sands of Iraq
Steady on, lads, now there’s no turning back
With tooth and claw they tear and rend
They’ll see it through to the bloody end

No militia can stand, nor insurgency fight
While Bears and Pumas stalk the Baghdad night
We’ll see peace in our time in the middle east
Secured not by man, but rather by beast
–Mikey

The Clarks of New Hampshire are great.
They’ve pledged help for the bear surge, they state.
But if this is to work,
None of us can dare shirk.
Let’s stake Noonan in Basra, as bait.
–RubDMC

What passing-bells for these bears and pumas who die as cattle?
Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
Only the stuttering rifles’ rapid rattle

Can patter out their hasty orisons.
No mockeries now for them; no prayers nor bells;
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs,
The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them from sad shires.

What candles may be held to speed them all?
Not in the hands of young bears and pumas, but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of good-byes.
The pallor of young girl bears’ and pumas’ brows shall be their pall;
Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,
And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds.
–RubDMC

One world … One world
The cats of war won’t negotiate
The bears of war don’t capitulate,
They will take and you will give,
And you must die so that they may live
You can knock at any door,
But wherever you go, you know they’ve been there before
Well winners can lose and things can get strained
But whatever you change, you know the pumas remain.
One world, it’s a battleground
-Candy

A grizzly recruited to save the Iraqis,
on catching insurgents, responded quite frankly,
“I swipe with my paw,
then I clamp down my maw.
It’s like fishing for salmon back home in Alaski.”

Quoth a Florida panther from down in the Glades,
found mauling a Baathist caught in a raid,
“The one thing I ask,
when I finish this task:
That my deed be recorded by Thomas Kinkade.”
–J—

A puma lies at roadside dead
His fearsome teeth stained Muslim red
He wouldn’t have been downed, ’tis sure
But for want of pawdicure.
–Righteous Bubba

Somebody’s moggy at the side of the road
Somebody’s pussy who forgot his highway code

He’s nobody’s moggy
Just red and squashed and soggy
He’s nobody’s moggy naaaaooooowwww

Let us have a moment of silence for those who have given their furry lives to the cause of Freedom Fries.
-Qetesh the Abyssinian

Sniff his haunches, lick his face
Another casualty from the Bear race
He fought the good fight, right to the end
The sorrow in your soul will mend

Remember those who fought the fight
They did what they could, day or night
Bears and Pumas, freedom’s best hope
That last drop of devotion at the end of their rope
–Mikey

US resolve, once forged of steel
Has now become banana peel
On which the noble bear has slipped
And graceful puma sprawled and tripped

Must bear go hunt without clean fez?
“I don’t care a whit,” our congress says
Can puma pounce without fur support?
“Brushes cost too much” the pols all snort

Who cares enough to maul the worst?
Who serves by ripping neck out first?
Rending flesh and tearing tendon
Munching Muslims with abendon

These beasts deserve the best we offer
Buy your bear bonds! Ope your coffer!
Let honor show, entrepreneur,
That Yogi cycle, Pete puma purr
–Righteous Bubba

What fate awaits the veteran bear,
Fresh from the front, blood-matted hair?
A tickertape parade and thanks?
Or spit upon his wounded flanks?

He’ll end up bitter, used and jaded
Working at a job much hated
Patrolling kids in shopping malls
Or rousting queers in bathroom stalls
–Righteous Bubba

Onward, bears and pumas, marching as to war,
Boo-Boo bear and Yogi going on before.
Snagglepuss, the Master, leads against the foe;
Forward into battle see His banners go!

Refrain

Onward, bears and pumas, marching as to war,
Boo-Boo bear and Yogi going on before.

At the sign of triumph Satan’s host doth flee;
On then, bears and pumas, on to victory!
Hell’s foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
Brothers lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.

Refrain

Like a mighty army bears and pumas move;
Brothers, we are grooving where the saints have grooved.
We are not divided, all one body we,
One in hope and doctrine, one in charity.

Refrain

What the saints established that I hold for true.
What the saints believèd, that I believe too.
Long as earth endureth, bears the faith will hold,
Kingdoms, nations, pumas, in destruction rolled.

Refrain

Crowns and thrones may perish, kingdoms rise and wane,
But the bears and pumas constant will remain.
Gates of hell can never ‘gainst pumas prevail;
We have bears’ own promise, and that cannot fail.

Refrain

Onward then, ye pumas, join our happy throng,
Blend with ours your voices in the triumph song.
Glory, laud and honor unto bears shall bring,
This through countless ages bears and pumas sing.
–RubDMC