This seems like a case where I’d want to use Occam’s Razor to slit my wrists after contemplating either of those two engaging in sexual activities.

Maybe they have merged to form one entity. One horrible, horrible entity.

One horrible, horrible entity, with lots and lots of ass.

P.S. Tintin, I think this scandal is worthy of the rabid pelican (etc.) gif.

Nah. They just screwed up the HTML. Although the first line of the article should be repeated as a mantra by every Republican for the next fifty years.

Ah, the brilliance of the wingnutosphere, fooling us into thinking that The Whale and K-Lo were seperate entities when they were actually one ginormous black hole of stupidity.

Maybe we have it all backwards.

Yes you do, you chubby-cheeked little right-wing dingbats!

Come on, like we all didn’t know that this stuff is probably outsourced to monkeys on typewriters or written by Python scripts. It’s a purely accidental duplication the same content under different circumstances – they’ll be all like “But you believe in EVOLUTION which is just as improbable! Haha, I win forevar!”

They just screwed up the HTML.

Sorry pal. If you can’t see Bilderberg in this you’re BLIND.

I postulate that they just posted the same fax-blast.

But the real question is, who writes the fax-blasts?

To determine this, I suggest we use the idea of projection. I think the originator — “Source Zero” — is a partially aborted illegal immigrant child of a biracial couple who has naughty gay impulses and is currently also employed at the Department of Education. Did I get enough in there?

Whatever happened, it’s central to their point.

I think they’re merely separate avatars—like a Kali and Shiva of stupidity and bad writing.

This is ironclad, indisputable proof that the entire rightwing media is actually funded and written by George Soros, who is doing it to dupe lefties into his grip.

What I find most distubring is that one would have to spend a considerable amount of time observing the writings of K-Lo and Loadpants to discover this duplicity.

That can’t be good for one’s health.

Or perhaps this was mistakenly posted from the pied-a-terre that K-Lo keeps over the Gowanus Canal in Brooklyn, the dirty little secret being that she logged in on her laptop first, posted it under her own byline, then went to take a shower.

Meanwhile, Jonah raised his eyelid…hey, look, when you’re that massive, it takes effort!…and realized he was on deadline and was regretting the evening’s festivities, found Mother Inferior’s laptop, and peeked in her cache.

Well, he’d already seen her in her underwear, so this is not as big a surprise as you might think.

Then, realizing that her piece was precisely the length he needed (if only he’d been the same to her!), and to boot, K-Lo is slightly more comprehensible than Jonah, who failed composition in fifth grade, he then posted it, figuring no one would ever spot the duplication.

Underestimating the power of “Sadly, No!”

Ah, the brilliance of the wingnutosphere, fooling us into thinking that The Whale and K-Lo were seperate entities when they were actually one ginormous hack hole of stupidity.

That was an insult to black holes everywhere, so I fixed your post.

Actually, I think this is indisputable proof of a rogue talking point generation app written originally by an NSA spook hacker in MontyPython script.

One of them is fake and one of them is the Vault Copy Original. An examination of the kerning, or prayer, will reveal the truth.

>NSA spook hacker in MontyPython script

What, no ComicSans?

But seriously, I really think they must have had a miscommunication and both put their names to the copy that was supplied to them. I hear you can hire Indian pundits for like a dollar a day.

Maybe there was a transporter accident, like in The Fly, only the resulting monstrosity eats even more sugar donuts.

Maybe the wingnuts form together into the mighty Voltneocon!

I like the montypython talking point script bot idea, though. It sure makes sense, over the past 8 years of hearing, “the liberals are no more! They have ceased to be!” over and over again.

Incontrovertible proof that there is, in fact, only one wingnut.

Or alternatively, that there are none at all! Neither K-Lo nor D-Pantload actually exist. William F. Buckley was an out-of-work actor who needed the money. The whole of movement conservatism is in fact a put-up job by the DNC to filch hard cash from hard-working librulz to keep themselves in hookers, blow and sweet sweet cream pies.

Actually the world makes more sense when you look at it like that.

Blunder Twin powers … activate! Form of … a blubbery, sexless scold! Shape of … a self-impressed blob of dough!

And featuring John Derbyshire as ‘Gleek’!

class JonahGoldberg(Wingnut, Whale, Pantload):
  def blog(self, topic):
    Wingnut.blog(self, topic)
    print('This is central to my point.')


That’s a good wingnut program: it lacks input validation or error checking.

This just shows that, as we suspected, the two of them off shore all their writing to India. Based on the lack of understanding of America in their “writing” I think this explains a lot.

If K-Lo went on a diet and lost several tons of stupidity she would still make me vomit every time I saw her.

Oh come on! The stories are not identical. K-Lo’s has a picture of barack HUSSEIN obama. She also gives you a chance to vote on it.

Want your wingnuttery with serifs? K-Lo’s your gal.

Sans? That’s Doughbob’s game.

Obviously you don’t appreciate how teh new medias work!

And now they’re both staring across the internet at each other, wondering who will back down first and delete their column.

Amazing. Where are the trolls on this one? I predict “Dan Rather” will somehow come up in the case for the defence.

It not fair to win the thread when you are a contributor to this blog, Mr. Aristophanes.

I guess the take-away is:

Never underestimate the nexus of laziness and stupidity.

On K-Lo’s page, Jon from AZ’s comment pointing out the, ahem, snafu was just deleted.

It was up when I just posted the same comment.

I see that it’s up now. probably because i called attention to it here.

Have we ever seen them both in the same place at the same time? It would be irresponsible not to speculate….

T H E E X P L A N A T I O N:

They used to be Two but now they are One —

Who did? Who did?
Who did? Who did?
Who did swallow Jo-Jo-Jonah?

Who did? Who did?
Who did? Who did?
Who did swallow Jo-Jo-Jonah?

Whale did. Whale did.
Whale did. Whale did.
Whale did swallow Jo-Jo-Jonah

Whale did. Whale did.
Whale did. Whale did.
Whale did swallow Jo-Jo-Jonah

Want your wingnuttery with serifs? K-Lo’s your gal.

Sans? That’s Doughbob’s game.

Clearly I had this backwards. But that just happens to be central to my point.

That’s a good wingnut program: it lacks input validation or error checking.

It also depends on things that don’t exist, and won’t work.

All one troll pundit asshole.

You liberals have no appreciation of consistency. Obama’s clever, blundering socialist fascist agenda is all too recognizable to keen-minded conservatives, thus the like-minded response.

Exact same words. Mere coincidence.

Maybe the wingnuts form together into the mighty Voltneocon!

That always falls apart when they start arguing about who gets to form the head.

9:50am (CDT)

the twins are still out.

K-Lo could threaten to expose herself to DoughPants if he doesn’t back down; around the NRO offices, that’s known as the “nuclear option”.

You misspelled nucular, Batman. Remember, this is Wingnutville.

Nordlinger,

They did try to bury both comments by posting some repetitive spam.

So I reposted.

Did they ever resolve who was the first wingnut to say “Reagan’s dead, and he isn’t coming back”?

Now we must ask:

Is it Kathryn that wears the Jonah suit, or Jonah that wears the Kathryn suit?

A breathless public awaits the answer…

I try to be a compassionate person. I scold myself when I think that seeing wingnuts of this high a caste choke on their own vomit would be delightful. But when it actually happens, good lord is it sweet. How are they going to explain this? A mistake?: “Whoops, I thought I wrote that column.”? This is an awesome takedown, even though they just handed to you.

I am sure the LA Times, which proudly publishes Jonah’s weekly rants on how terrible life is for wealthy white men, would be interested in hearing about this from all of us. You can reach them at readers.rep@latimes.com.

It’s the Wingnut Welfare Community Theater production of “Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote.”

Seriously they both should be fired for this. K-Lo also gets published in the Wall Street Journal and Washington Times.

I’m struggling to imagine an acceptable excuse for this. I bet it will be something like this: An intern was tasked to publish K-Lo’s column at NRO, but mistakenly was logged in as Goldberg and published it under his name instead of hers.

This just shows that, as we suspected, the two of them off shore all their writing to India. Based on the lack of understanding of America in their “writing” I think this explains a lot.

I’m pretty sure Jo-Lo do(es) their own writing: text from India would be better.

Based on exhaustive and scientific analysis (browsing through a few of their columns) I deduce that the true author is DoughyPantload.

1) It contains no glowing references to “Mittens” Romney

2) There is no blame assigned to feminism

3) Barney Frank is dragged in for a gratuitous kick.

This is truly a thing of beauty. A terrible, awful beauty, to be sure, but beauty nonetheless.

Of course, it won’t matter to their dain brammaged audience. The 28% who worship at the wingnut altars (ick!) will accept any pathetic explanation offered. I am guessing an intern will take the blame.

so..is this when one or both close up shop and are never heard from again?

I expect the party of tough-on-crime needs to be starting a wingnut welfare fraud investigation.

I’m just waiting for the passionate argument from some wingnut about why J-Lo’s column is RIGHT and Pantload’s is WRONG (or vice-versa.)

That would be the piss frosting on this shit cake.

I try to be a compassionate person. I scold myself when I think that seeing wingnuts of this high a caste choke on their own vomit would be delightful. But when it actually happens, good lord is it sweet. How are they going to explain this? A mistake?: “Whoops, I thought I wrote that column.”? This is an awesome takedown, even though they just handed to you.

Time saving tip: Don’t scold yourself; let a professional right-wing columnist do the scolding for you!

“use Occam’s Razor to slit my wrists”

Just one wrist. By definition.

K-Lo + Pantload = Jerry Garcia (w/ wingnut face mullet)?

A possibly relevant term from the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar tongue: melting moments.

Its definition of “malkin” is worth noting as well.

Update 2 really hurts me in the eye-and-brain region. Also, I am still amused that the shared column is called “Big Bedfellows”. Big indeed. What else are we to believe?

Re. Update 2 – look, no-one wants to see K-Lo’s beard. kthxbai

Ugh. That update looks like Peter Griffin in a wig.

Obviously this column is so good that no single human being could have written it. The two of them wrote it together by slamming their heads together at high speed and having an intern write down the utterances that poured forth from them. The intern simply failed to include both their names when submitting the writing, no doubt blinded into error by the sheer brilliance of what he had heard.

Wow, Bono’s REALLY let himself go.

re: update 2

Can we call it K-Load?

Hey, wasn’t that the poster that was put up at Penn State when Jo-Lo spoke there the other night?

He really DOES look thinner!

If only there was some way to vote on both columns. We could give it the ol’ Sadly,No-ist snark and vote one five stars and the other one star.

Is it Kathryn that wears the Jonah suit, or Jonah that wears the Kathryn suit?

Neither, but they do swap underwear now and again….

Checking in @12:25 EST, and the mystery column is still up at both sites. Comments at Clown Hall by Jon and actor212, helpfully pointing out this authorial discrepancy, have not at this moment been disappeared.

Heee heee what fun.

Not to fear, Micheal Steele will soon be explaining how the ghostwriter in charge of RNC talking points inadvertently sent the same opinion piece to both parrots. These things happen.

They’re going to claim that it was a glitch. Once they resolve the “whose fault was it” question, which might account for the delay.

Either that, or we’re in for one of the most beautiful bouts of wingnut infighting ever.

“Don’t scold yourself…” – But I thought this was de rigueur for liberals.

When is the mendacious explanation going to arrive? I’m growing impatient with their incompetence in covering for their incompetence. They should have come up with several vaguely plausible lies by now.

*EPIC PWN*

Oh the humanity, oh the scandal, oh the horror, oh the … near total lack of surprise, given that in both cases their formulaic agitprop truly could be generated by a fucking bot, & nobody would much be any the wiser.

Wow – you’ve got these schmucks both nailed like Jesus & yet … & yet … both Exhibit A & Exhibit B are STILL hanging from the Interwebs like glistening siamese-twin nose-goblins … dude, you have totally earned a Webbie Award for this – or at least 10 free internets, whichever costs less.

Well look, if they were mating it’s obvious that after the act one has eaten the other.

Now we need a team of heroes to get to the egg sac before the younglings hatch.

You have been reddit-ed. And that submission seems to have legs.

1.12 and Doughy is still oblivious to Big Bedwettergate or whatever we want to call this scandal.

http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=YzRhNmQ5NjQwMTY3Nzk1ZGQ3OTk1M2Q1ZDkzMDQ0M2U=

Aw fuck – now I have to actually enrol @ reddit so I can vote it up. Number 23 there at the moment.

I long suspected that K-Lo and J-Gol were the same person.

Is it Kathryn that wears the Jonah suit, or Jonah that wears the Kathryn suit?

It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets K-Lo again.

Oh, pish. and tush. All this uproar over what on its face is a simple mistake or a Liberal Plot. I must point out that it can’t be plagiarism or copyright violation or anything of that matter, since by definition those sorts of things aren’t done by the Pure In Heart. Now, can we have some more photos of Marie Jon’? Don’t bother with her writing, though. Too bad she doesn’t belong to a belief system that holds that women should be seen and not heard – she’d be an ideal concubine.

lol, neither of those sites allow comments either. hmm.. I wonder why not.

I don’t know what the big deal, it’s a completely understandable mistake by the editors. Are you saying you could distinguish the two from the waste down? I guarantee that if Jonah did the “Buffalo Bill tuck”, you’d never know which was which.

Are you saying you could distinguish the two from the waste down?

The K-Lo editorial reach is broadening.

*WHEN WINGNUTZ COLLIDE*
Hot diggity damn – it’s like the most meta FPS evar!

Go to Clownhall, hit F5, go to NRO-Town, hit F5, repeat. Silly, yes, but until I get bored with it, it’s every bit as jovial as Candy Mountain Massacre!

How much longer will this delicious angel-fail cake stand up before the Lollercaust? Who will be the first to blink? How fast can I set up a betting-pool on this Clash Of The Tit(an)s?

I think we all know the most important lesson we’ve learned here today:

TEH BUTTOCKS.

Ignore this wisdom at your peril.

BREAKING!

I e-mailed Doughy, and he replied with this short, yet somehow ominous reply:

“I wrote it.”

Kathryn Lo, I’d keep an eye over your shoulder today. Make sure everybody knows where you are at all times, and prepare your own food.

Wow. Wonkette shout-out. Impressive.

So wait… Doughy is admitting that K-Lo is his sock puppet? This just gets betterers and betterers.

I mean if this was plagairism, you’d think he might hint a bit in that ultra-brief email that he was, well, upset or something.

Nancy Grace needs to get on this scandal rightnowgogogo!

Thank you to whoever at Sadly, No! made the top image, which is perhaps the greatest image in history.

Sweet.

Well look, if they were mating it’s obvious that after the act one has eaten the other.

In the insect kingdom, including Blattaria, the female eats the male.

And truly, it must have been a banquet.

check the kerning! Is there a vault copy of the original?

Perhaps Jonah Goldberg is the drag-king identity of K-Lo.

Duh.

I’m sorry, but I do not suck as much as those two.

So let’s see: Joe Biden forgets to credit Neil Kinnock with a line once out of the dozens of time he quotes it and that’s…”PLAJERIZZM!!! ZOMG !!!111!!!!

This is, of course, just a natural mistake. You liberal droogs are so cute that you think sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander, and…oh, oh! I just threw up in my mouth a little.

This is some hilarious stuff. They have to remember to at least “spin” their talking points somewhat…

As I predicted they blame a clerical error. What kind of shitty blogger doesn’t blog for themselves?

The actual column is pretty dreadful, the same disingenuous pabulum Goldberg usually flings.

Maybe they have merged to form one entity. One horrible, horrible entity.
There is a Clark Ashton Smith story along those lines, but I need another two five cups of coffee before I can be arsed finding it.

What Batocchio just said.

Only The Load could emit a column about “Obama and the economic crisis” by (after claiming brotherhood with “Newt” “on Hannity”) ignoring the causes and, therefore, the possible solution to the economic crisis; calling the Prescription Drug Benefit for Medicare a good thing *for patients* as opp. to Big Pharma; reciting his universally-discredited revisionist history of the New Deal; and closing, triumphantly, with a call for less government regulation of the kinds of institutions, the lack-of-regulation of which have caused the current nightmare.

“Trifecta” doesn’t begin to describe it.

Maybe they have merged to form one entity.

The Beast With Two Butts.

Neither Pantload nor K-Lo wrote the column, it was written by the dwarf who rides them both on alternate days.

The Blunderdome, two wingnuts enter, one wingnut leaves.

The Blunderdome, two wingnuts enter, one wingnut leaves

*wiping away tear*

That was beautiful, man.

Loadpants says he wrote it? Is he accusing K-Lo of plagiarism? Did Clown Hall screw up? What’s the story? We should poke and prod them both with e-mails of torment demanding an explanation.

We should poke and prod them both with e-mails of torment demanding an explanation.

Funny, I had a date with a woman tonight whom I thought I was going to take home but suddenly I’ve lost my libido….

“Trifecta” doesn’t begin to describe it.
So if you split the column into three, each part would be a fectum.

So if you split the column into three, each part would be a fectum

More like an infection.

That photo illustration is the stuff of nightmares. Mother of God, that is one ugly manthing or womanthing.

More audio!

In the spirit of my previous post:

“We don’t need another K-Lo!”

That story has been squeezed from the essence of several wingnut sources. Gingrich sort of wrote it with his mouth on the Hannity show. But he was referencing DoughyPantload’s book, Liberal Fascism when he was talking. And then it was channeled to the readers of Town Hall through K-Lo. So it is the unholy outcome of the most incestuous and disturbing hook-ups imaginable. One thing we can be sure of, there was plenty of oil to cook with.

Gingrich on Liberal Fascism

So if you split the column into three, each part would be a fectum.

Fectum? usw.

The Beast With Two Butts.

Oh dear God. I’m dying. DYING.

Teh Tomb-Spawn!

The thing was like some blasphemous dream of a mad devil…
The urn-shaped torso was endowed with two heads. One of these heads was beaked like a cuttlefish and was lined with long oblique slits where the eyes should have been. The other head, in close juxtaposition on the narrow shoulders, was that of an aged man dark and regal and terrible, whose burning eyes were like balas-rubies and whose grizzled beard had grown to the length of jungle moss on the loathsomely porous trunk. This trunk, on the side below the human head, displayed a faint outline as of ribs; and some of the members ended in human hands and feet, or possessed anthropomorphic jointings.

Through heads, limbs and body there ran recurrently the mysterious noise of regurgitation that had drawn Milab and Marabac to enter the vault. At each repetition of the sound a slimy dew exuded from the monstrous pores and rilled sluggishly down in endless drops.

Doughy is admitting that K-Lo is his sock puppet?

Thank you for putting the image of Jonah fisting K-Lo into my head.

Fucker.

which is why America’s shittiest T/R website is also America’s shiFtiest.

Sorry. I meant T/M, as in trademark. All that shitty rightwing commentary leaked into my brain.

Has no one else noticed this ( At the “ASW” link in the post):

What Thin Gruel [Jonah Goldberg]
Okay, so my syndicated column went up at Townhall today. As I mentioned earlier, they messed up and put it under Kathryn’s byline. Her actual column is up over there as well. It’s annoying, but such glitches happen. But apparently some leftwing blogs think this is the most hilarious revelation imaginable. I’m being pelted with really stupid and juvenile email from people who think this is some sort of major scandal, that it’s proof of plagiarism and lord knows what else. I mean, is this the best leftwing blogs have? Misprinted bylines? I knew having Bush gone would be rough for that crowd. But this is really sad.

Maybe we have it all backwards.
That would be the Eighth Circle, 4th Bolgia.

Concerned Load is concerned.

The fact is tat you ignore the reality of this column. The Obama plan is a plan that will destroy America’s way of life. It will lead to mass poverty and socialism. The Obama plan is a man built on socialism. Obama is a socialist and he is a Marxist. Obama knows nothing about economics but he was brought up by communist marxists. The Obama Presidency has been an epic disaster for America so far. Obama is clueless and arrogant. Obama is too busy being a celebrity to be a leader.

This is where Brad would say “Real Gary” I think.

Welcome, Fark!

Cost cutting, same article, different drooler. Only one bag of cheetos to pay and the target audience don’t notice.

Ooooh … audio update wins by a nose (/beak) !

What Thin Gruel [Jonah Goldberg]

Seems like thick meaty stew when the day comes to an end & said “mistake” remains standing. Or is admitting one’s own errors a mortal sin in KJL’s twisted atavistic version of morality?

The reek of fishiness only gets funkier with every hour the “mistake” remains … no editor with a shred of ethical sense (or 5 neurons to rub together) says “stet” with such a catastrophic smeg-up staring her in the face – an immediate retraction, an apology, & looking for a new line of work would be the decent course of action if she had any real intellectual integrity.

As someone who once fancied himself a poet I can tell you – if anyone so much as reprinted my work without my permission (let alone under their name), I’d want their head divorced from their gullet tout de suite.

Methinks the fuzzy-faced man-bitch doth protest not nearly enough.

Seeing as how both of these two work for NRO, and both are contributors at Townhall, what’s the whole point of this post rather than serving as an autonomous circle-jerk? Depending on how NRO and Townhall work, Goldberg’s explanation for the mishap is entirely feasible and logical, an even more simple explanation than the snarky ones you came up with. Occam’s razor, now 50% off at Wal-Mart.

Congrats to Doughboy for coming in No. 56 in the 100 Unsexiest Men of the Year list.
Other highlights include Plungebob Dumpants scoring a Top 20 placing and Limbaugh earning the top spot in a landslide.

Image of K-Berg:

The most horrifying portrait ever created.

You should be detained.

OTB:

If that dollar-a-day Indian pundit is either Ramesh Ponnuru or Dinesh D’Souza, then Lopez and Goldberg paid too much.

Hey George, imagine this; the explanation is so plausible, it’s the perfect cover. How sharp are those razors?