Cypher on that title for a minute…Shit has gotten Real, Real, Son. Now those of you who are what one might call ‘familiar’ with me know that I am something of an up-jumped, tarted up Race-Pimp of the worse kind! First, I am a Lieberal: But because Lincoln freed the half of my posterity what was in bond-aged servitude prior to his assasination, means, in what passes for logic in Wingnuttia, that I should Be a Republican, like Jackie Robinson, because, that race traitor Lincoln was one.
While I can’t cite chapter and verse, I believe that I have actually heard this reasoning before in the wild, though current memory issues mean that a secure glimpse of what I heard or what I saw may have issued forth from the gob of Rush Limbaugh. Sue me for lack of citation, but even the most strident Rock-Ribbed Rushpublicans among you, or members of the Department of Anthropublican Studies, may have a similar recollection. And are invited to share any such memories in the comments below.
The cipher here, the big con in play being, of course, inoculation from any accusation of Racism. Lincoln was a Republican see, so Republicans can’t, by the transitive properties of Derp(checkpoint infinity, carry the one/translide with a catechized googleplex), be Racist,ever. Democraps, however will forever be saddled with a fusillade of bullshit within which will be a mention of Jefferson Davis, a fart to distract from the smoke-bomb that covers the getaway to higher ground and finished with a “See, I told you so!” (Gag shamelessly ripped from Edroso..TYVM, sir!).
Now after eight long years of bonded servitude White Folk can breathe freedoms cool fresh air, released from their chains and toil in the field, from the raping and from the lash, But now my friends, you are free, or will be in about ten hours after this is published, and likely by the time you read it.
I hope you remember us fondly, and I hope we did not treat you too poorly, and best of luck to all of us.
Sorry, but I can’t leave without saying this: This shit is going down! To Fucking Day! That was a nice little constitutional Republic we had there, so While it might be a bit late, we should get to work on some nets, working.
Interesting times, begun, they have!