A MurderDome™ Sized Dewlap Bag Stuffed with Ass

Was hanging out with some old friends at an old haunt when I was introduced to this gleaming shiny bleach-mouthed paragon of Wingnuttery, a member in good standing of the All your Uteri Are Belong To Us™, Division. For those of you that don’t make it regularly over to Mother Jones I present to you: Rick Brattin.


I cant think of any particular amendments to make to the image as it is almost a joke unto itself, invoking in my mind black lit velvet Elvii from the 70′s, those huge eyed paintings from the 60′s and ultimately a Rear window tintstrip of the Eagle crying with a flag background on a pickup truck festooned with yellow ribbon magnets and bedecked with a pair of TruckNutz (a pair of which I caught in the wild recently with a friend who had been previously unfamiliar with the concept, which got away before I could get a picture, but I digress.)

Anyhoo, this lovely young man has somehow managed to become a state Rep in the Show me State of Missouri and has a really good idea. Dig it, ladies, and Gents, he wants to mandate that women who are about to obtain abortions (apparently still legal and available in MO.*) obtain the permission of the sperm donor before the procedure can take place. Now in the case of “legitimate rape” she can forgo this necessity as though the burdon of proof, oddly enough seems weighted on her. Incest, also, too. Here he mansplains his version of the meaning of “legitimate rape”:

Brattin adds that he is not using the term “legitimate rape” in the same way as former Rep. Todd Akin (R-Mo.), who famously claimed that women couldn’t get pregnant from a “legitimate rape” because “the female body has ways to try to shut the whole thing down.”

“I’m just saying if there was a legitimate rape, you’re going to make a police report, just as if you were robbed,” Brattin says. “That’s just common sense.” Under his bill, he adds, “you have to take steps to show that you were raped…And I’d think you’d be able to prove that.”

*Apparently I was only half joking:

Missouri is home to only one abortion clinic, based in St. Louis. Each year, legislators target the clinic with dozens of new restrictions. In 2014, the GOP-controlled Legislature approved a bill requiring women seeking an abortion to wait 72 hours between the initial consultation and the procedure. It’s the longest abortion waiting period in the county.

One clinic located on the edge of the state, under constant assault. Check.
The logic that follows is well, just special

A group of Democratic lawmakers in Missouri found the onslaught of anti-abortion bills so ridiculous that in 2012 they introduced a bill to ban vasectomies except to save the life of a man. If conservative male lawmakers imagined jumping through hoops to obtain reproductive services, the thinking went, they would see the absurdity of their anti-abortion crusade.

Not Brattin. The father of five says that his recent vasectomy was the inspiration for this bill.

“When a man goes in for that procedure—at least in the state of Missouri—you have to have a consent form from your spouse in order to have that procedure done,” he says. “Here I was getting a normal procedure that has nothing to do with another human being’s life, and I needed to get a signed form…But on ending a life, you don’t. I think that’s pretty twisted.”

What I think is twisted is that you didn’t think that having your spouse sign off on the procedure was a ridiculous violation of privacy and think about doing something about that. I might add that spousal agreement in this case makes at least some kind of lizard brained sense, where as your sperm donator protection act seems not to require any spousal involvment at all.

But then we get to the punchline, which should surprise none of us:

A spokeswoman for Planned Parenthood of the St. Louis Region and Southwest Missouri, a group of clinics that perform vasectomies, says that there is no law in Missouri requiring a man to get another person’s permission for a vasectomy. Individual providers sometimes require a patient to have his partner’s consent. (Planned Parenthood of Missouri does not.) Brattin saved the document his wife signed and intends to share it with other lawmakers when it comes time to promote his bill.

Maybe he can see if he can get the Jar with Santorum’s abortimiscarriage child for show and tell as well.

From his Bio:

Rick was born in July 1980 and grew up in Greenwood, Missouri where he graduated from Lee’s Summit High School. After graduating, he worked in the construction industry until September 11, 2001. He then joined the United States Marine Corps where he served for six years as a Noncommissioned Officer. Since then, Rick has been owner and operator of a family construction company and tends a 40-acre farm in central Cass County north of Harrisonville.


If a Wingnut Prick Bleeds, Does it You?

Wishes he could be a man and not just a Simulacrum of one.


Unlike our Hero below. Actually there may be a few “heroes”…

We’ll Start with a comment held up in moderation…Talk about an easy mango harvest…So DroolingToolHandsInPantsEightBallInCornerPocket Iron Guardsman starts thusly:

They are always talking about how over crowed our schools are, well Obama what do you think you just done to the school systems.

Starts as a love note to the President and one wonders (Hey Obammer, good to see you bud) how in the hell someone so eloquent as to completely cockblock what was gonna be some delicious snark I had planned for this bit in only the second sentence, knows that Obama spends a considerable amount of time reading this blog and thus this message would reach its target, is beyond me, but then Horatio there are things in heaven and earth…

How many will sit in class all day and can’t even speak a word of English.

Or write a proper sentence, spell, cohere,…Mr Guardsman does earn points for something resembling retention and demonstrates a mastery of Regurgitation.

Just where do you think jobs will come from for 5 million illegals, that’s millions more that will be on food stamps and every other give away that’s out there.

As Far as the Jobs are concerned, they already have them and truth be told most of them work harder in one day than your sorry ass toils in a week, and that is me being generous, my dear friend.

And as usual the American tax payers will have to foot the bill.

Dude as far as the generous givaways and food satrapamps that yer hardly-earned tax monies is for payin’ look no further than your white trash neighbors, or the ones two blocks down and possibly some of your fellow guardsmen and women who are hoovering up the vast majority of welfare in this country. And once again, the question must not only be asked, but begged. If these ingrates have it going so fucking good, why have you, Mr Guardsman Sir, failed to purchase a ticket for a ride on that lavish GravyTrain™? I understand that they have a main office on EasyStreet™ where they are practically giving tickets away.

This comment is a longish one so let see what else sticks in Iron Man’s craw.

We have had laws all along about immigration, that you ignored. That was the only problem with immigration, no one would follow the law and deport them as they crossed our borders like a bunch of cattle.

If a hanging curveball was an unhittable pitch, this sonofabitch would have a couple of bookshelves laden with Cy Young Awards. Did they use to “deport” cattle from Kansas City to the Chicago Stockyards?

I’ll leave the rest as an example of “‘Tis better to be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.”

Now you have caused our country to be over run by millions of illegals, a lot of them are rapist and murderers and every kind of #$%$ there is.They are still coming here daily, because you have failed to do your job and have blocked anyone that wants to do what should be done. This stupid move by our dictator of a president will destroy our once great nation.I did not vote for you and that is the reason, you do not know a damn thing about running a country, you have never listened to anything the American citizens wanted for our country. For some reason you think you know what is best for us and we are suppose to just go along with your idiot ideas. If this POS is not impeached he will bring this country down before his last and final term is up.Obama you are a disgrace to this country and to black people also.You have gave our country away to a bunch of illegals and want us to be happy about it. Well i want everyone thats illegal to be deported, they broke the law, and i want our borders closed down tight and guarded to keep anyone else from crossing our borders illegally ever again. If you want to come to America, do it the right way.

In order to be a fully functioning member of the Wingnut Tribe requires the balancing of so many Psychoses as to reduce a Cirque du Soliel Juggler to tears.

For some reason this morning that Brick and Mortar favorite of ours The Conservative Treehouse pooped into my head, so I think that a trip yonder way might find some Nut-ricious delights. Totally forgot that they were keeping it real, helping fill the void left behind by Andrew Breitbart. Again the Masthead


Yeah, Uhm, Er, Treehouse…Check. Breitbart, uhm…check. I could goof on that all fucking day long, I mean just examine the absurdity, let it wash over you and then climb the ladder into some certain to be boilerplate Winger Bilge with an oily sheen of Racis…Hell, every ism that does not kindly appoint its utterer.

To be as fair as a blood-spattered be-fanged lunatic left winger can be, the site is actually called The Last Refuge. But with a URL of http://theconservativetreehouse.com/ one can’t help but point and laugh when faced with the banner. So on to the HaterAde™. While the the current post at the top is a bunch of God Botherin’ stuff and bible quotes (washes the stain of hatin’ right on down it does), the one that follows starts thusly and is sure to be a Rejoice-a-thon MRA style:

Via Daily Caller – When Ryan, a University of Virginia student — described in the widely-discredited Rolling Stone article on campus rape as “Randall” — told Jackie he was not interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with her in September 2012, he says “it did not go over very well.”

I think we are about to see the wind up and delivery of some serious “Bitches be Crazy” heat coming toward the plate…Actually not. In order to find some actual yakking I had to hit a link that quoted more of the DC and then another Read More link leading to the DC article itself. Blooging be easy over there. Lets check under the next pile and see if a Unicorn stabs us in the eye.

Friday’s Portland “School Shooting” Was Gangbanger Violence – One Suspect Arrested…

Posted on December 14, 2014 by sundance

2014 Modern Media Disclaimer: The story you are about to read is true; all events happened as described in mainstream media; however, the races have been removed to protect the narrative….

Portland, Ore. — A suspect in a shooting that wounded three students outside an alternative high school was arrested early Saturday in what appears to be a gang-related attack, Portland police said.

There we go, everything written before the words Portland, Ore. are composed by his slickness and not at all racist misoginious Mr Butch, I mean Sundance. The rest is Cut and Paste of the article and while the comments are a hoot I can see why we don’t visit this space very often. I hope that coward Mr Dance has a fucking day job.



Don’t know how many of you have been enjoy-a-cringing the current season of Newsroom, Aaron Sorkins latest vehicle about Aaron Sorkin, but I promised to stop watching at least four times (halfway through the first episode I was like “not only is this bad, but where exactly is it going, and can we get a fucking continuity cop on site, stat”.) Now I was only made aware of the return of Newsroom by a post that Spocko had made at Digby’s place.

I enjoyed the first two seasons (first most) and was happy that it was on again. Now it is like watching a slow motion thing wherein somehow a clown-car (the VW bug with 20 clowns within) managed to take over the controls of a train (don’t ask me how, it just works as an image in my mind) that finds itself out of control and headed in the direction of a baby animal farm.

The most recent episode has been panned far and wide as an example of horrible television, primarily due to the way it deals with a storyline involving a rape victim, wherein Sorkin (sole writing credits) Sorksplains™ why the rape victim should not have set up a website naming her assailants. The analysis of that particular fail has been taken care of far better than I could. Jezebel, AV Club, The Guardian, Vox, The Atlantic, and many others did just that.

What seems to keep drawing me back into the show is a fascination at one, a complete lack of self awareness by the show creator, and two, just what the fuck are they trying to accomplish. The show is all over the place and I only found out yesterday (after vowing to watch only one more episode, that there was only one left.

It was clear that most of the cast was well aware of the fact before I was, because it seemed like someone migh have set up a phone bank and comfy chairs and trays of bon bons on set. The only way they are gonna be able to wrap up the series in one episode is going to require the unpacking of every treacle laden cliche that has ever entered anything resembling a story in hollywood at its worst, and someone with more powers of giving a shit about it than I should really come up with a drinking game and prepare to take the following two days off.

On to other shit, much cooler shit, in fact, this:


Of course the Usual Suspects were up in arms. Post comes to screeching halt because while trying to catch up with some of the Usual Suspects I was caught in this web cast by VDH:

Some of the public may think that the lessons of Michael Brown — and Trayvon Martin — are that it is unwise to commit a crime and then assault an officer, or confront a stranger in the rain and slug him in the head and get into a tussle, given that such targets may be armed and may respond with deadly force. But I think critics would privately respond that in Al Sharpton’s America both cases instead advise to take the beating and do not dare use a firearm for self-protection from assault on the chance the attacker is unarmed. In retrospect, Zimmerman might have preferred to have been “whoop-assed,” or Wilson preferred being slugged than to become lifelong targeted pariahs…

h/t Roy

One of the things I love about the Aliens shows on the History Channel aside from the guy with the hair, so crazy and earnest, that it makes you want to become a believer, is the reliance on “Some say’s” and “May’s” to support the most tenuous of argument, and here Victor comes galloping right out of the gate using the same formula.

I’m not sure exactly what you get when you mix slippery slopes with argumentum ad absurdum, and a healthy dollop of terrified white privilege, but i am thinking that it looks alot like that paragraph or pretty much everything Hanson has written.

Yesterday I went traipsing through the wayback machine to see what if anything of the old SadlyVerse I might be able to recover and I found some stuff:

And some old faves and at the top of the list will be this font of ButtSmugly:

From his latest, a bit about Landrieu’s chances today, this is dropped into an od graph about halfway through the piece.

An analogous situation arose last month over the Keystone XL pipeline, which billionaire global warmists oppose and the Obama administration has delayed. The House had approved multiple bills that would authorize construction, but despite bipartisan support, as Fox Butterfield might say, soon-to-be-former Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid refused to allow a vote.

On second thought I should have gone with this picture instead:


I think if we launch an exhaustive search, we will find that all of these “billionaire global warmists” are hiding behind polyps in Taranto’s colon. And who the fuck is Fox Butterfield anyway?


But Nobody Bleeds for the Hack Writer

And while this article is a bit older, the fact that it was written during Ferguson where people were being harassed and beaten by cops for daring to be upset that their children were being casually murdered with little to no repercussions is just the icing on the fucking cake for how myopic this shit is.

Bobo* Brooks, The Old Grey Corpse:
Why Partyism is Wrong

Hey everyone, listen up!

Bobo has a very important problem he wants to share, one deathly important to humanity at large and a huge swath of ill-done and oft-oppressed people. Yes, our brave narcissist is stretching himself for once, showing great empathy for what is truly a national tragedy. One whose pain is all but ignored by even the most fierce social justice paladin.

You may wonder what group has so tragically slipped through the cracks of even the most conscious parts of our society? Well…

It’s right wing think tank hacks.

Well, not right-wing think tank hacks who are happily employed, receiving huge buckets of money to comfort the comfortable and afflict the afflicted. No, no, what breaks Bobo’s heart is that there may be no place left for the next generation of talentless blowhards and sociopaths who trusted the wingnut welfare system to be there when they graduated college with zero information learned and nothing but an extensive trust fund and a VP chair in their daddy’s company to support them. And now, they are forced to get real jobs, one’s that may even look askance on a collegiate career of being a constant bigot and doing nothing but wingnut welfare “work”.

Truly, no other group has been so betrayed and disempowered!

Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):

  • Snff. It’s just not fair that companies and academic institutions aren’t overrating complete hacks anymore simply because they’ve spent their time waging war against actual work and academic endeavor! Sob. And like that’s literally the worst oppression like ever. People shouldn’t judge people by qualifications, because that’s discrimination. Oh no, that sounded too close to being something almost sane, so let me expand on that to note that people shouldn’t judge people by their politics in everyday life and interpersonal relationships, because it’s all a game anyways and doesn’t have any real impact on anyone’s life… well, not anyone that matters, anyways. Like that’s the worst bigotry that ever bigoted!

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Praise the Fallen

~Shall I stand as a total stranger? On this day in this stone chamber?~

Counting the dead… nay, counting the dead who have been murdered… no, counting the dead who have been murdered because of who they fundamentally were is sadly a yearly tradition for trans* people. It shouldn’t be. I mean, given how small of a community we are and how specific that situation is, it shouldn’t really be a thing, much less an annual thing. Much less an annual thing that involves a list of dozens and often hundreds of names, all snuffed out in hate crime after hate crime, striking home like the deaths of unarmed black men and boys by cops. The Transgender Day of Remembrance that we hold vigil for every year in the trans* community shouldn’t exist. In an ideal world, it wouldn’t. But instead, we live here, so we gather and refuse to let those so casually erased be forgotten.

You can see part of the list of names for this last year on the TDOR website and see the appalling truncation of so many men, women, and non-binary individuals lives (especially in Brazil. WTF Brazil. W. T. F.) for the dumbest and most senseless of reasons. And what makes this year strange is that the name I’m mourning most is not a name that’s even on that list. In fact, it’s probably the closest to an antithesis of the usual end for trans* individuals you can get (dying in old age, after a long disease, cared for in final days by a long-term romantic partner, and fondly eulogized).
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Welcome to the United States of White Supremacy


The thing is this has always been a fait accompli, the shit was woven into our founding document. Right there in paragraph three of section two:

Representatives and direct Taxes shall be apportioned among the several States which may be included within this Union, according to their respective Numbers, which shall be determined by adding to the whole Number of free Persons, including those bound to Service for a Term of Years, and excluding Indians not taxed, three fifths of all other Persons.

Which in essence means that if a southern state had 50,000 “other Persons” which would add at least one representative to the state in question. Still in paragraph three:

The Number of Representatives shall not exceed one for every thirty Thousand, but each State shall have at Least one Representative;and until such enumeration shall be made, the State of New Hampshire shall be entitled to chuse three, Massachusetts eight, Rhode-Island and Providence Plantations one, Connecticut five, New-York six, New Jersey four, Pennsylvania eight, Delaware one, Maryland six, Virginia ten, North Carolina five, South Carolina five, and Georgia three.

One might wonder if Virginia in this case had enough slaves to grant it an extra representative or two. In any event, from the get go the South has had us by the balls. They were able to count slaves toward the amount of Representation they would hav in congress an after a very brief respite during the era of reconstruction were able to count “free” black persons while denying those very souls the right to vote.

Last night someone asked why they waited so long to deliver the findings. I would say that there are several reasons: One. Cover of darkness to make it more difficult to determine what was happening and where, when the tear gas started flying. Two. To provide opportunities for the collection of images of Blacks on Rampage to ensure that the media had plenty of “they had it coming” fodder to the drooling masses that directly benefit from White Supremacy. Three. So the drooling minions of mammon, among others we have Jonah Goldberg can “wingsplain” the reason that it is the season to get the heathens.

I believe the grand jury operated in good faith and from what I can tell Officer Wilson had the facts and evidence on his side. Given the eagerness of some parties to exploit Brown’s death, it’s tempting to see this as a partisan victory against the forces of Sharptonism. And while I can’t muster sympathy for the looters, car-burners, the dress-up Bolsheviks and that ilk, I am trying to see this through the eyes of those I disagree with.

The last bit being possibly the most disingenuous thing this particular shartiste has allowed to pass from his pressure release valve. Following that nothingburger in his inimitable style I’ll leave the parsing for those whose skulls have not been softened by a constant pounding into a hard surface.

If McCulloch wanted an indictment, I think he could have gotten one (prosecutors and ham sandwiches and all that). Whether he should have gotten one is open to debate. I certainly think you could make the case that the country would be better off in the long run if there was an open and transparent public trial. On the other hand, we don’t have trials of innocent men simply for appearances’ sake. Having a trial just for show is too close to a show trial as far as I’m concerned.

The last sentence is too clever by half of half.


Strange Fruit Flambè, or Tarmac Roasted Brother™


“Bennie Simmons, alive, soaked in coal oil before being set on fire. June 13, 1913. Anadarko, Oklahoma.”

They didn’t fuck around back in the day. They knew how to string up a person so they wouldn’t die, so they could extend the show. I am sure that a flaming corpse will tickle the nethers for awhile, but a full on medieval, live flaming body has got to fill an observers pants with all kinds of moisture.

“Bennie Simmons, or Dennis Simmons, accused of the murder of sixteen-year old Susie Church, was taken from prison guards in Anadarko, Oklahoma. His killers led him to a nearby bridge and hanged him from the limb of a cottonwood tree flourishing by a stream. ”

The Negro prayed and shrieked in agony as the flames reached his flesh,” reported a local newspaper, “but his cries were drowned out by yells and jeers of the mob.” As Simmons began to lose consciousness the mob fired at the body, cutting it to pieces. ” The mobsters made no attempt to conceal their identity,” remarked the Enfaula Democrat, “but there were no prosecutions.” Purchased in Oklahoma.

I think we can add a new definition to “Call and Response.” “…flourishing by a stream”…Nice touch, because I was concerned with the health of that tree.

Now in 1913 there was no internet to get the LynchPorn™ delivered, but they had you covered should you have missed out, they sold Post Cards: “Gelatin silver print. Real photo postcard. 31/4 x 5 in.”

Etched into negative, “Edies Photo Anadarko Oklo””

Which means that they didn’t just print ten or fifteen off. As Without Sanctuary makes clear there was a market and these were collectables.

Now we have often gagged about the tendency of the Projectithoritarians™, Tories by any other name, to drag us into a new gilded age, it has become clear that they want the full monty, and fortunately in the early part of the 21st century they can enjoy their Lynching Hard-ons by proxy. Like for instance leaving a dead man in the street for four hours so a thorough investigation can take place or so as many might get the “message” as possible. Undoubtedly Mr Simmons remains were left up in the cottonwood tree to give those the chance what missed the party and who could not wait for the Post Card an opportunity to take part ex-facto and anyone else for whom a message might be delivered, to receive it.


Take note of the left arm in the Photo above, what you see is some high tech, top of the line, pocket investigation equipment, (one wonders if it plays pool.)

That the stream of blood running from Michael Brown’s lifeless body resembles a rope, is simply a side effect of slope, but it does resemble a rope and this was a lynching.

Near as anyone can tell this will be an awesome thanksgiving week for African Americans as it has been intimated that the results of the Grand Jury deliberations shall be released this week. We shall see.


Still got Nothing, Or Mayhaps too Much.

A number of things have conspired in any number of attempts to conjure up a Sadly worthy jeremiad over about the last four or five months. and there were many things that came like a flood of fodder during that time, starting near-abouts with Ferguson and the dead kid left in the street for four hours.

Some shit just knocks the wind out of you and being hit by a fusillade of hatred, naked racism and bullshit can on the right days get to even the most tightly girded of us.

Personally, there was the job I had to get out of lest I appear before a judge on assault charges, some rather uncomfortable issues with my health which stole time, vim and vigor. The laptop went down (more accurately the power supply went down and with a battery life measured in minutes…we are in brick territory.) Thank the FSM that I know how to use a soldering iron.

So the good news is that Lappie™ is back in business after a six week hiatus. My body seems to be gaining strength after a month of pain. While I am not sure where next months rent is going to come I figure I can manage a patron. The return of JP is of great solace as well.

Yesterday, I was cleaning/straightening up my room and ran across my beloved Nexus 7 which I had given up for a brick over a year ago. For shits and grins I thought I might plug it in and attempt to charge the beast. I honestly had no hope whatsoever given previous attempts, but 20 minutes later I caught the google bootup screen out of the corner of my eye and was like “You’re fucking kidding me.” I had to make sure that I left it alone for at least an hour as I went about my business (this was hard).

Happy to say that after 5 software updates the Nexus is humming along with the latest version of Android and I am a happy camper. I am going to take this as a sign that things are beginning to turn in this holler. If the Opinel and Swedish fire steel make an appearance all the better.

Sometimes it is the little things…


Post-Election Hangover

Everybody in the club getting tipsy

I’ll admit I reeked of booze on election night. To be fair, it was because my girlfriend placed a poorly sealed glass of scotch in a really precarious place and it spilled all over me, but fuck it, I’m counting it.

Ugh… I had a sinking suspicion this would be the result and by sinking suspicion, I mean Nate Silver foretold it in the exacting way he has done every other election, and so knew this was a given and so began drinking early just to be ready.

And it makes sense for it to go this way this time. Yes, Republicans are still more crazed than a wolverine on meth and are still dedicated to getting petty revenge on the filthy “others” who dare pretend they are people by burning everything to the ground. But they also managed something this election cycle they haven’t in previous years. Which is not letting their reptilian masks slip too much before they were put in seats of real damage. There was not an exorbitant amount of candidates ranting about witches or the Trilateral Commission. Heck, they’ve even managed to keep their talking points relatively bland and most importantly of all, seem to have mostly cut out the right-wing noise machine entirely, letting them focus almost exclusively on demonizing individual Democrats than doing much defending of their worst offenders.

Mix that in with a bunch of battleground states that were mostly carried through on Obama’s tidal wave back in 2008 and the fact that most of the supposed liberal candidates were too afraid of being called commies or “liberals” to actually defend super popular ideas like the increase in minimum wage and our slightly expanded health care and of course the wonderful help provided by our Supreme Court in rubber-stamping the modern “literacy tests” and well, it’d make sense that the Reptilians would be able to claw and scrape themselves into a position where they can at least more effectively derail not only legislation, but even congressional debate that isn’t about one of their endless hobby horses.

It’s understandable, but still shitty, seeing as how nothing has really changed and conservative ideas have only become more insane, disconnected from reality, and pettily abusive to see the usual groups of morons forget that the election cycle it isn’t shoved in their face repeatedly. And I can draw comfort in the continued social victories, that minimum wage increases are succeeding even in glibertarian hellholes and that there is continued peel-back at least in my state of the entrenched and vile prison-industrial complex and drug war. Not to mention the utter failure of the professional homophobes to even really get much in the way of anti-gay legislation to the ballot, much less win.

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Reefer Homicidal Madness

I think I got this! No is the answer, right? Yeah, I’m definitely going to go with “no”

Cliff Kincaid, Stream of Consciousness America:
Can Marijuana Fuel Jihad

I think unhinged wingnuttery can sometimes be viewed almost like musical pieces…. not good music mind you. After all that requires craftsmanship and effort, two things most wingnuts are tragically fatally allergic to (or at least I’d assume that’s the case given their bowel-movement like regular posts). But certainly the type of music produced by a bunch of kids entering into their first Battle of the Bands without practicing because their “natural talent” is going to make them “megastars”.

And given that lens, we can see the evolution of genres like the worst radio station on the planet.

I mean, you’ve got the throat-scratching primal screams of hate, the ham-fisted metal-like noise of people who think simple loudness equates to technical proficiency and sweeping baroque like illustrations. And you’ve got the insufferable version of an emo self-pitying cry apeing the alienation of the genre to instead wax poetically on the immeasurable and seemingly invisible slings and arrows suffered by the overfed and powerful at the hands of such nebulous concepts as “gubmint” and “social justice warrriorrrs (come out to play-ay)”. And let us not forget the insufferably pompous attempts at deep intellectual and complex work farted out by the equivalent of a talentless boy band, hoping that overwrought swoops and nonsensical metaphors will somehow equate to having anything of worth to sing about. And all manner of paycheck songs, album filler to round out the set and keep the crowd awake as one wonders on the wisdom of quitting one’s day job.

And of course, today’s output: the genre mashup. Now, I generally love genre mashup pieces, as one might expect from an old-school techno fan. When well-done, they can give new life to multiple styles of music and produce a much-needed fresh sound.

But sometimes, you get messes like these. Discordant noise made out of ill-stitched standbys of the genre in order to create a horrifying Frankensteinian monstrosity from still rotting tissue.

And unlike The Monster, there is no saving this tragic beast.

Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):

  • In the course of human affairs, it appears that right-wing myths about mary-jew-juan-a can explain why the sand-monkeys and niggers are violent and dangerous forces needing only the most exacting elimination. To demonstrate this, I will casually assume, yes, a handful of right-wing muslims in the news used this shit, but such pedestrian concerns tire me greatly, so instead allow me to devote the majority of my time to the smearing of those darkies slaughtered by our brave and certainly not high at all cops, lest any forget that the whole mary-jane panic is about (and has always been about) demonizing the faggots, the niggers, and the assorted commie scum.

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