Vermin On The Mount
Pace Michelle Malkin, illegal immigrants are dirty, rotten scoundrels, as likely to drive a school bus off a cliff as look at you. And let’s not even get started on the mess the wetbacks made of the azalea beds at our ancestral estate — they’d been instructed time and again to mind their horrible, smoke-belching gardening contraptions while edging the lawn, but to no avail. I rather think we shall have to deport them.
But to Michelle’s main point about the horrible school bus tragedy in Minnesota: ‘It didn’t have to happen.’
Authorities have confirmed that the the driver of the van that struck the school bus that killed 4 students on Tuesday is an illegal alien.
Officials at the Immigration and Customs Enforcement are checking to see where she came from and how long she’s been in Minnesota. FOX 9 has also learned that the name she gave to police, Alainiss Morales, is an alias.
We have our own suspicions about who this person might really be, but the important thing to note is that Michelle Malkin is correct — this didn’t have to happen. Any other view would be the most noxious sort of fatalism. If this ‘Alainiss Morales’ person hadn’t been allowed to insolently wade across the Rio Grande (or as we suspect, Lake Michigan), this wouldn’t have happened.
Of course, that’s a tall order given our current enforcement policy. And anyway, even if ‘Alainiss Morales’ had been stopped, some other illegal might have hit that school bus. Whether a ‘Debbee Gibsonzales’ or an ‘Avrilla De La Vignillenueva’, we can’t really know — only that it might have occurred.
So clearly we needed for all illegals to have been duly rounded up and deported well before this incident even took place, so we could be sure that it really, really wouldn’t have happened. Nor would that effort have been particularly impractical, of dubious merit, cruelly draconian or have resulted in any unforeseen and unintended consequences. Anything to get each and every ‘Alainiss Morales’ off that particular road at that particular time. Because isn’t it ironic, don’t you think? When you crash into a school bus full of children, on your deportation day?
Well, it isn’t ironic at all, and is in fact a gross misuse of the word, which is, indeed, central to Michelle’s and my point. Nor is there anything resembling irony in the fact that even as the number of illegal immigrants in this country has risen, going from about 8.5 million in 2000 to some 11.6 million in 2006, the number of traffic fatalities per 100 miles driven has sunk to record lows.
And to any critic who might raise an eyebrow over the above statistics, Michelle and I would have you know that is disingenuous at best to attribute full causality to a single factor like illegal immigration when explaining a complex trend like falling vehicular death rates. Whereas blaming a person’s immigration status alone for one particular vehicular death and then extrapolating from your verdict the further conclusion that every illegal immigrant who ever lived must be collectively blamed as well, is, of course, perfectly legitimate. And if it’s four deaths, and they’re children … well, that is some steel-trap logic you will never defeat, moonbat.
More recently we learn via Malkin boy ward See-Dubya that the Papist conspiracy to foist Aztlan upon us all is infecting proper Christians:
The “New Sanctuary Movement” in mainline Protestant churches
By see-dubya • May 27, 2008 02:21 PM
First of all, can we change the misleading term “mainline Protestant” denominations? They’re not really that “mainline” anymore.
Gavin adds: Just like Sister Ray said.
They built ugly churches and began regarding the Bible as optional, and as a result they’re dwindling away like the Church of England. I like “sideline Protestants”, but I’m open to suggestions.
May we humbly suggest ‘Los Protestantistas’? Or perhaps the more piquant ‘spic-loving race-traitors’?
Anyway, the latest inspiration for the sideline Protestants is their new Magdalene, Elvira Arellano. Today the Washington Times has published a report on this “New Sanctuary Movement” that Arellano inspired.
Ahh, the Times. A more well-regarded and responsible agent of the fourth estate we would be hard-pressed to name. If only its publishers would heed my many requests to cease printing it upon recyclable newsprint — the hobos who gather ’round our rubbish bin to fight over the past week’s editions are a menace.
I’ll let you read the whole irritating thing, but let me draw your attention to this detail at the end: the whole movement hinges on a single legal loophole, one that could quite easily be closed by an interested Congress:
Although sheltering illegal immigrants is a felony, sanctuary organizers said in interviews that they had found a loophole in the law: They inform the local ICE office about an immigrant’s presence, thereby evading any charge of secretly harboring fugitives.
Shouldn’t openly harboring fugitives be a crime as well?
Indeed. And how terribly un-Christian, isn’t it just, to offer shelter and food to the wretched and poor. Next thing you know, they’ll be letting itinerant preggos squirt out their mewling brats in the rectory. Why, Jesus would be puking his guts out if he were alive to see what’s going on in His name!
Update: ‘hawkeye54’ (whose moniker, incidentally, gives us hope) in comments on the See-Dubya thread informs us:
And as [‘sideline Protestant’] congregations seem to put more emphasis on themes such as shamnesty and glowbull warming than what should be their primary goal, and tending to substitute entertainment and 5-minute PC soundbites in place of meaningful teaching – maybe the term should be “Sideshow Protestants”
Clever spelling of ‘global’ aside, what’s notable is that hawkeye54 never gets around to explaining what these congregations’ ‘primary goal’ should be. One assumes that ‘turning away poor people’ would be an insufficient example of ‘meaningful teaching’ in the great Christian tradition, so perhaps it’s alerting the police to their presence or better yet, citizen-arresting them.
Jesus would be puking his guts out if he were alive to see what’s going on in His name.
That last part isn’t even snarky.
It is and it isn’t.
How warm do you have to get a bull to make it glow again?
Obviously it’s central to her point that illegal immigrants are stealing crimes that could be committed by red-blooded Christian American patriots.
…what’s notable is that hawkeye54 never gets around to explaining what these congregations’ ‘primary goal’ should be.
Bringing on the Apocalypse as the prequel to the Second Coming, amirite? Bomb bomb bomb, Bomb bomb Iran!
I think he must be talking about BINGO.
Bringing on the Apocalypse as the prequel to the Second Coming, amirite? Bomb bomb bomb, Bomb bomb Iran!
Partially. First on the checklist though is the crucifixion of abortion doctors, Qweers, and uppity minorities.
It almost seems as if Malkin and her ilk believe that the woman who caused the crash did so deliberately; that she wanted to hit that bus. I’d be surprised if she weren’t as sick about it as any of us would be if we found ourself in a similar situation. By extension, she’s trying to make us fear all people who come to the US from a foreign country looking to better their lives. If only she could somehow place herself in the shoes of a woman born in a foreign land, who just wanted to move to America to have a better life, and instead ended up doing something tragically horrible which will forever taint her in the eyes of most people. Wait, never mind.
Nothing makes Miss Maglalang’s day like the heady sense of self-righteousness she feels when smacking down someone who chose their parents unwisely.
Partially. First on the checklist though is the crucifixion of abortion doctors, Qweers, and uppity minorities.
I was going to say, yeah, long term it’s apoco-super-frag-o-licious, but I’d give fair odds that ol’ hawks there would put killin’ dirty fuckin’ hippies right up at the top of the list of what the church needs to be accomplishing today.
…what’s notable is that hawkeye54 never gets around to explaining what these congregations’ ‘primary goal’ should be.
I believe that would be the implemenatation of the Holiest of Holies – the Flat Tax.
implemenatation should be a word dammit.
“Show no tolerance towards undocumented immigrants and fugitives from justice” is definitely the lesson I took from the “Flight into Egypt” episode of the Crucifiction.
Speaking of which, my favourite painting of the Flight into Egypt is this one by Altdorfer. Not sure why it appeals to me. It’s something about the cherubs paddling in the fountain and getting their plumage wet.
My comment mysteriously disappeared after WordPress dobbed it in to Homeland Security.
Repeating the comment — this time without links —
“Show no tolerance to undocumented immigrants and fugitives from justice” was definitely the lesson I took from the “Flight into Egypt” episode of the Crucifiction.
what’s notable is that hawkeye54 never gets around to explaining what these congregations’ ‘primary goal’ should be.
The Rapture, baby! It’s all about the Rapture!
D. Aristophanes:
I followed your link to find out that, each year ~15,000 road-deaths are caused by illegals!!!
what’s notable is that hawkeye54 never gets around to explaining what these congregations’ ‘primary goal’ should be.
I thought the church’s primary function was to provide a Sunday service for me not to go to, so that I can feel a sense of blasphemous satisfaction for sleeping ’til noon.
No, the Church’s primary function is to tell people to feel guilty for nothing and make them beg forgiveness for their “sins.” Then everyone goes to brunch.
It’s a strange game, yet tax-deductable.
… continuing after a dramatic pause:
by illegals I meant drunk-driving, which IS illegal in all states.
See, there is a very clear and proven connection between an illegal activity and accidental road-death. These deaths probably should not have happened. Why is this not a political issue? Is Congress asleep? What about breathalyzer checkpoints on every freeway ramp?
I don’t think they could have picked an example that better illustrates that what is faintly disguised as “respect for the law” and “concern for public safety” is pure unadulterated xenophobia and racism.
We live in an imperfect world. i have driven after one too many, nobody has ever called me an “illegal”. I have let friends drive when they were buzzed, without being called an accomplice. Do bars and clubs check if everyone has a designated driver? Are those sanctuaries?
It’s about the “brownies”, folks, it has nothing to do with “laws” and “road safety”…
In your haste to put the blame on the Latins, you’ve overlooked many other risks.
What if it had been Teef al-Ni? Or Mandil Mur?
Or Britney Spears?
Jesus, this is reason enough to deport all Latin Americans AND all pop singers.
The only reason I no longer snicker quite so heartily at the OH NOES FURRINERS! crowd is because the economy sucks, even BushCo’s habit of shuffling the numbers on unemployment can no longer hide the fact that we’ve got ourselves an unemployment problem.
We know what happens when certain sectors of society suddenly decide that cleaning the pig scraps out of sausage machines for a dollar over the minimum wage isn’t such a bad gig after all, but they can’t get the job because some other sector of society is already cleaning the sausage machines for a dollar under the minimum wage.
Deytukrjobs! is the rallying cry of lynch mobs through the ages.
Full disclosure: When people don’t mistake me for some sort of Islahomofascist they think I’m Hispanic and even that’s not a problem except for the assholes. Fortunately most of that type comes from places far away from here. However, tourist season is upon us and I don’t want any bullshit from those dickheads or asshole cops who’ll see one crazy brown thug assaulting a bunch of nice Caucasian people. “This rope? We only wanted to play jump rope with him officer, honest!”
No, the Church’s primary function is to tell people to feel guilty for nothing and make them beg forgiveness for their “sins.” Then everyone goes to brunch.
Unless, of course, you’re Unitarian, wherein the Church’s primary function is to provide tea and donuts.
It’s a strange game, yet tax-deductable.
Were I a more sociable beast, I might wonder how to get me a slice of that pie. Unfortunate that, like bilking the military for substandard equipment while charging them bazillions, I find such business unsuitable for even those with as weathered and bent a moral compass as I.
Sigh. I should just pawn that moral compass and be done with the whole affair.
re: Update
SniperX69
Ass Assassin
Money Shooter
5-minute Penis Soundbite
Protesting (Back)Side Entry
AmnestyChrist
Oh, I was going to post this yesterday, but I got visions of a Sadlynaught terrorist action.
http://wordpress.org/development/2008/05/birthday-party/
Yah. Happy fucking birthday, guys. That rake I told Malkin to use? Yeah.
I shoulda gone just for the booze. They owe me that much, anyway…
The fact is, liberals, your threatening comments about Malkin, as well as your obvious support for illegal aliens has been reported to Homeland Security, who will be very interested in monitoring your activities for signs of jihad friendliness and anti-USAism. The illegals and the terrorists are working together, and your inclination to selectively enforce the law weakens America. I am sure Homeland Security, who will find nothing to hide from me and Michelle here in the Heartland, will find plenty of laws to enforce to correct your behavior.
Illegal immigration is a problem?
Quick, let’s spend the last 30 years undermining the economies of our closest neighbors in Mexico, Central America, and the Caribbean so that once their working classes and small farmers have been devastated in the name of “fee tade” and “modurnizin” and the like they will have no choice but to, er, um, stay where they, um…
Wait a minute…..
Never a more well written piece has ever existed on this site. Bravo. When the snark is crunchy enough to be served with milk and take its place as the main part of my delicious breakfast, I know that a day full of whimsy and delight awaits me.
Reason just doesn’t work with some people. Pity, compassion, empathy – I don’t know, not everyone got a full helping I guess. But when God himself says in his magic book to be extra-special-nice to immigrants, because they might actually be angels, yet they STILL behave this way – well, I’m afraid it might be a lost cause.
I just don’t know how to dumb it down any further.
Do atheists have a sanctuary program?
Remember that next time you bash people who go to church.
These people are just…sad. I can’t imagine spending every damn waking hour worrying about fucking Dunkin Donuts, Rachael Ray, and if they’re contributing to global jihad through a fucking scarf. Really. This is what these people are concerned about. This is what these people really define themselves through. This.
This…sucks.
The church has a sanctuary program because immigrants are Catholic and they need bodies in the pews, money in the basket, and new priests. They mostly have moral concerns too, but if the immigrants were Jewish it’d be a different story.
The purpose of a religion is to worship a deity. The purpose of a bureaucracy is is to pay its bills.
Do atheists have a sanctuary program?
Not as such – atheists tend to believe the whole world to be a sanctuary…from being dead.
Do atheists have a sanctuary program?
Well, no. On the other hand, we vigorously discourage a “kill ’em all” philosphy, since we’re the ones who’d have to sort it out.
Hrm. Apologies. (But “philosphy” ought also to be a word.)
hawkeye54 should be ashamed of sullying the good name of Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce.
Reagan’s “national security” maniacs went nuts over the original sanctuary movement, in which ordinary Americans helped Nicaraguans, Guatemalans, and El Salvadorans flee the terrorists and genocidalists that Reagan had hired to try to quash independence and liberalism in Central America.
It was in part the Reaganites’ fear that the U.S. public might break out into 1960’s / 70’s style mass civil disobedience upon a U.S. invasion of Nicaragua — yes, that’s what they wanted to do until their released ‘white paper’ stirred up panic even among elites that Ollie North was tasked to help with Readiness Exercise 1984, yet another plan to suspect the Constitution and impose martial law, this time to save us from the Russians who would invade us via Nicaragua by, like, boating to Florida or somehow driving un-noticed through all of Mexico.
It was Bill Clinton who had to drag FEMA out of its Carter / Reagan-era identity as a paranoid nuclear survival “continuity of government” agency tasked with, say, maintaining radio contacts in nuclear fallout situations, and temporarily enable it to handle, er, “emergencies” and disasters not related to Soviet or Chinese nuclear attack. This came up in part because when Florida experienced Hurricane Andrew, FEMA’s ability to provide encrypted radio communication to military craft elsewhere in the world somehow didn’t seem as helpful as being able to provide 2-way radios or water.
And it was Bush Jr. who took his revenge on Clinton’s meddlin’ with FEMA by handing it to a failed horse show director.
So, you can see clearly how these paranoid nutballs would forever loathe, loathe the sanctuary movement for helping the brown people they targeted for death to escape with their lives.
Incidentally, it was of course Reagan’s war on the civilians of Central America which prompted the first massive migration of Central Americans into the United States.
And then it was their importance to the crumbling California service economy and their money sent home propping up the economies of Reagan’s death squad governments that lead to Reagan’s Council of Economic Advisers to recommend the “amnesty” program which the nutball right somehow blame on teh libruls.
“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling (1 Peter 4:8-9).”
“Thou shalt neither vex a stranger, nor oppress him: for ye were strangers in the land of Egypt. (Exodus 22:21)”
“In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you, for this is the Law and the Prophets. (Mathew 7:12)”
I’ll guess that in the mind of HawkEye none of these qualify as the types of lessons a church should teach.
Love one another as I have loved you.
That is all.
Well, that settles it. Laura Bush MUST be deported. She’s been coasting along all these years since that fatal collision, and has anyone seriously examined her family history? If they did, I’m sure they could find a Laura ancestor who didn’t cross an i or dot a t, so that’s it,:she goes back to Bizarroland whence her people came. Traffic collision: the first clue that alienistic illegalism, with its penchant for lethal thrill-driving, is in the neighborhood.
Thanks for the great statistical pair D. Aristo – rising numbers of illegals and falling motor vehicle deaths. A false causality worthy of my local mega-church preacher. What could Many Eyes do with it?
Did the poor woman who is apparently responsible for the tragic accident in Minnesota have a valid driver’s license? Sounds like a vicious question but it’s worth thinking about. As I understand it in some areas of the country an illegal can have a valid license without using an alias. They can also use an alias and get a valid license for it. If I’m right, this is just one more argument in favor of the citizens’ registration office! If all citizens were required by law to register with a local citizen registration office by presenting picture ID and proof of address then the entire illegal immigration question would dry up like the Rio Grande in August. There would be illegals but not millions of them. There would be no need for a Mexican wall or vigilantes on the border. There would be no need for a census. Best of all there would be voter registration with unquestionable integrity and voter turnout rates in the 80s. Move to a new town and the first thing you have to do is go into the citizen registration office and show them your picture ID and proof of address. You’re automatically registered to vote, registered to drive, registered for schools, registered for taxes. There wouldn’t be anymore calls for a pogrom after an illegal causes a particularly tragic accident.
Being married to BushBrat is punishment enough. Plus she has Iron Babs for a mother-in-law.
I think you mean Lake Superior. Or any of the great lakes except for Lake Michigan, which is the only one contained fully within the U.S. Crossing lake Michigan implies that the Canadian illegally moved from Muskegon to Milwaukee. I don’t think that’s the joke.
Douglas Watts said,
May 28, 2008 at 15:43 (kill)
Do atheists have a sanctuary program?
Remember that next time you bash people who go to church.
I think I’ll remember being lectured by some dick, as is frequently the case around churches.
El Cid,
Right on brother! These administrations, the country as a whole has responded to fear of foreigners with plans that require the destruction of neighboring countries and cultures, generating floods of impoverished desperate people who are willing to die in their attempt to get across the border, requiring budgets with Mars-shot dimensions that end up serving primarily the bonkerites within and their gun fetishes. Sadly those of us who have sense have lost and lost and lost with each renewed call for more border security. The true answer is in comparison dirt cheap: a citizen registration office.
I think I’ll remember being lectured by some dick, as is frequently the case around churches.
I just wanted to see that again. And I wonder if it is mick hick dicks that pick vics to fix.
Move to a new town and the first thing you have to do is go into the citizen registration office
Awesome! Now we can all be tracked like sex predators!
Well, no. On the other hand, we vigorously discourage a “kill ‘em all” philosphy, since we’re the ones who’d have to sort it out.
Beautiful.
Oh, it’s not just the Protestants. I recently saw a letter from the Catholic Bishop of the Seattle Archdiocese, an ho boy, talk about some appeasers!
This effin’ commie was advising his other Catholic commie brethren that it was their duty to take care of the unfortunate and invisible in the community. It specifically mentioned undocumented workers, too!
Can you believe the gall, the temerity of this hippie? What’s next? Soup kitchens?
I think the Catholic Church should get back to what it does best: Crusades and Fondling Altar Boys. Only then will the full glory of the church be revealed.
It’s OK everybody! According to Newsweek (although I can’t find the article now), the illegal aliens are all going home because the economy sucks so hard.
Yay! Problem solved! We just needed to make our economy more like theirs!
It’s so simple!
Mr. Watts,
Who is bashing on the generic church goer?
We’re talking about these idiots who use the church to justify whatever cockamamie scheme pops into their frightened, moronic heads.
And the rest of you:
Stop cherry picking quotes out of the bible to make it seem like Jesus was a hippie. We all know if he came back right now he’d be the chairman of KBR. (At least that’s what Pastor Parsley told me, so I’m goin’ to heaven and you’re not! Nyah!!)
I think you mean Lake Superior. Or any of the great lakes except for Lake Michigan, which is the only one contained fully within the U.S. Crossing lake Michigan implies that the Canadian illegally moved from Muskegon to Milwaukee. I don’t think that’s the joke.
Well, if she came from Ontario through Detroit, she’d have to cross Lake Michigan to get to Minnesota. If she was on foot. Walking/swimming a straight line.
I-94 would probably be easier.
Kind of like how the drug problem in Afghanistan is being solved
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=90840970&ft=1&f=1001
Just make bread more expensive than smack, and all the farmers will start to grow wheat. What could possibly go wrong.
Wow! And if we decoupled things which can vary and take years to resolve – like citizenship – from safety procedures – like licenses – maybe this wouldn’t happen. Or maybe it would. It’s not like citizenship had anything to do with the quality of driving.
They built ugly churches and began regarding the Bible as optional,
Yeah. As we all know, that stuff about loving aliens as your own (for you were once cast out blah blah blah) isn’t all over the OT and NT.
OH WAIT THAT’S RIGHT
It’s not like citizenship had anything to do with the quality of driving.
In fact, I happen to know that in places where illegal immigrants cannot get drivers licenses, they tend to drive without them. Very carefully.
Susan of Texas said,
May 28, 2008 at 16:18
The church has a sanctuary program because immigrants are Catholic and they need bodies in the pews, money in the basket, and new priests. They mostly have moral concerns too, but if the immigrants were Jewish it’d be a different story.
wow, this is why my church has been participating in the sanctuary movement since 1982? all this is news to me; we’re presbyterians, and we’ve worked with refugees of several religions, and some who are not religious at all.
we are happy when people choose to join our congregation, but there has never been any pressure by anyone for people to be “bodies in the pews” (sanctuary seekers who lived with families from our church only attended services if they chose to.) our church has long been struggling financially, but we never expected to collect money from people who literally fled for their lives with nothing but the clothes on their backs. individual members of our congregation and the church as whole have contributed time and money to the sanctuary movement. and as far as priests? presbyterians don’t have them.
i’m not sure where you got this information. among my close friends at church are people who have shared their homes with other families, raised people’s children, and given their hearts and souls to this work. i can’t speak for every single church involved with sanctuary work, but i do know about mine, and i wish that you wouldn’t make these kind of generalizations.
If I am talking about Catholics, why are you offering your experience as a Presbeyterian?
I know that a lot of good people do a lot of good work. That has nothing to do with a church’s political decisions.
And a lot of people manage to do good without any help from a church. A church is not special. Religion doesn’t confer special status.
I’m sure all the Protestant clergy in South and central America that are converting Catholics to Protestantism are just doing it for their own good. Likewise, all the Catholic clergy in the Americas supporting exploitive regimes against the Church’s dreaded atheist socialists. They should all stay home and do what you are doing.
My former girlfriend was an illegal immigrant (over-stayed a student visa) and I didn’t rat her out to the feds and, occassionally, I even paid for dinner. Does that count as providing sanctuary?
Hey Shaun,
Just stay where you are and keep your hands where we can see them. Someone will be by shortly to, um, “ask you a few questions”.
Likewise, all the Catholic clergy in the Americas supporting exploitive regimes against the Church’s dreaded atheist socialists.
Which are these?
Susan of Texas said,
May 29, 2008 at 3:28
If I am talking about Catholics, why are you offering your experience as a Presbeyterian?
I know that a lot of good people do a lot of good work. That has nothing to do with a church’s political decisions.
And a lot of people manage to do good without any help from a church. A church is not special. Religion doesn’t confer special status.
I’m sure all the Protestant clergy in South and central America that are converting Catholics to Protestantism are just doing it for their own good. Likewise, all the Catholic clergy in the Americas supporting exploitive regimes against the Church’s dreaded atheist socialists. They should all stay home and do what you are doing.
i offered by experience as a presbyterian because sanctuary is an issue that is close to my heart, both personally and academically. and because i wanted to add my perspective to the discussion that was taking place. it was not my intention to offend you, and if i did, i am sorry.
i never argued that people couldn’t do good things without a church. i know that terrible things have been done (and are being done) in the name of religion. i do think, however, that the sanctuary movement (which is by no means an exclusively catholic undertaking [it was started by a quaker]) is a truly remarkable contemporary example of people putting their money where their mouth is by making sacrifices to help others in dire need, and that dismissing it as a ploy for members, money, or future clergy is cynical and unfair.