Fun, but irrelevant. Goldberg has pretty much decided not to pay any attention to Neiwert anyway, and cites some random person who agrees with him.

I don’t get the Heath Ledger snipe…

DoPa has found another gallant defender to save him from Neiwert’s big words:

http://liberalfascism.nationalreview.com/post/?q=MDNlNWMwYjk4MDI5YTE2MWRjMGM4YTRmNjdhMDliOWI=

It’s like eating ice cream with Santa Claus, then someone stops by to give you a basket of kittens.

Neiwert has done the Lord’s work here, which should be appreciated by serious readers who would rather read 10,000 words of analysis than 100,000+ plus of tendentious horseshit.

As for Goldberg, all of his responses so far to substantive criticism have been variants of the “victory lap” he performed after Juan Cole beat the snot out of him in 2006.

That’s okay. Since we are all fascist eugenicists, we are against trying to educate the ineducable anyway.

baegal20,

I think it’s in reference to the fact that since Ledger is dead, he’s physically incapable of being racist.

*relurks*

I think it’s because Heath, sadly having died, can no longer perceive race.

And for the main page of DP’s newest fan: “I haven’t yet read Jonah’s book, though the excerpts I’ve read seem diligently researched and forcefully argued…”

Those lunatics took over the asylum and wanted me to read the stuff I was critiquing! No fucking thanks, Professor Brainiac! I’ll sell my semiotic theory in the private sector and MAKE MILLIONS.

P.S. I think this site has linked my enthusiastic, Vin Scullyish reportage of the Goldberg v. Cole throw-down before, but here it is again.

Goldstein’s post is as hilariously unintentionally illuminating as Goldberg’s previous responses to Neiwert have been.

It seems that Jonah heard the popular adage, “Winners write history” but missed its slightly-less-famous corollary, “Losers don’t get to make shit up and call it history”.

I think it’s because Heath, sadly having died, can no longer perceive race.

What do you mean, sadly?

DoPa has found another gallant defender to save him from Neiwert’s big words
the response is from “Jeff G”, could that be G as in Gannon

Oh lord. I had not seen that Gibson thing. What a horrible person. He’ll have to be let go now, right?

I would guess that he will shrug off any controversy as easily as he did the time that he begged white people to breed so the world wouldn’t be overrun by darkies.

John GIbson is a bona fide cunt.

Dave Neiwert so totally worked harder on that post than Goldberg worked on his book.

Don’t look now, but Jonah’s gone all Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow on our ass.

No, really.
.

What’s a bohunk? I’ve never heard that one before.

…is quite simply and fuckingly kicking the ass-dicking felch-choad out of…

I hope, for a change, the kicker isn’t being polite as Goldberg is rather thick and tends to assume that if someone is smiling at him (whilst dispensing criticism) that he’s won them over.

Neiwarts post kicked my ass, and I agree with him.

Its like wolvesbane for wingnuts.

Look at that photo of Gibson. Dollars to doughnuts his body will be found with dildos in orifices you didn’t even know he had.

Dollars to doughnuts his body will be found with dildos in orifices you didn’t even know he had.

Cloverfield II.
.

Bohunk = racist term for a Bohemian (i.e. someone from the area of the Czech republic.)

Stephen Colbert, -1. You know it.

Niewert’s piece (which left me blinded after struggling to read black text on that orange background) reminded me of what Greenwald did to Dickhead Yankee last week. Not only has DoPa written a load of cow spit, now that he’s being called out he can think of nothing else to do but stomp his doughy foot and call Dave mean, meanie, meaniest meanie that ever did mean things.

heath ledger, haha good stuff

I just finished reading (entirely) Neiwert’s essay (I have read all the others) and I sent him some money. His discussion of Goldberg’s ghastly book must be rendered even more horrible by the adolescent sneers and taunts Goldberg considers to be a “response”. Inside, the Pantload is still a 14 years old pimply-faced slob everyone despises.

By the way: I am acquainted with many people who could fit the Simpson’s definition of “Comic Book Guy”. They are highly intelligent, humorous and kind folk who (mostly) did not receive a college education, and became, or were born, rather eccentric.

Goldblob is NOT of their ilk!

Wow. Smack-DOWN. Has any right wing mendacity ever been more thoroughly shredded than in this exchange between Neiwert and Goldberg?

Bohunk: derogatory slang for “lower class immigrant from Central or Eastern Europe,” probably from Bohemian + a distortion of Hungarian.

The more you know…

What race did Juan Cole exterminate ? He didn’t mention it in this morning’s blog.

Dave, I am so your bottom if you want me to be.

I’m so ahead of you on that one, D.

I always thought bohunk meant a big dumb hot guy.

Ya learn something new every day.

nice writing on that Crooked Timber link. Just watched that film again.Trippy, to say the least.

Okay, I have to kick John Gibson in the balls now.

I always thought bohunk meant a big dumb hot guy.
.
Well, judging by the massive quantity, and far superior quality of gay Czech porn… what? I’m serious!

I always thought it was invented in the 80s by John Hughes, like as in Molly Ringwald’s sister “marrying oily bohunk.”

have to agreed with Trilateral. Jonah’s never really gonna get worked. Best one could hope for would be to laugh at him in person, given the opportunity.

Jeez, guys, thanks, but I’m happily married. [g]

Thanks for the kind words, all. And the nice link, D.

Best one could hope for would be to laugh at him in person, given the opportunity.

I would sincerely like to throw a pie in his face.

I always thought it was invented in the 80s by John Hughes, like as in Molly Ringwald’s sister “marrying oily bohunk.”

No more yanky my wanky!

Let me add, they just wouldn’t make a movie like that today.

Shorter DoPa: Discussion of actual American incarnations of fascism doesn’t score any political points for conservatives, therefore it is intellectually unimportant.

“It seems that Jonah heard the popular adage, “Winners write history” but missed its slightly-less-famous corollary, “Losers don’t get to make shit up and call it history”.”

Yes, and he erroneously applied the contra-whoopsidaisy, or the objective- correctofabulizer, or whatever it’s called, which reads: “…but presuming to write history doesn’t make you a winner.”

And now there’s this.

I have to say–this is *fun*.

Jeez, guys, thanks, but I’m happily married.

So was I, Dave, so was I.

And actually, I don’t normally rhetorically fellate writers as much as I did in this post, hence the jokey-jokey.

Because, seriously, that really was some fine work you did (and have been doing) beating back the lies of ‘Liberal Fascism’ … and deserving of all manner of praise.

And now there’s this.

I have to say–this is *fun*.

That was fun! I particularly liked all the booze analogies.

Here’s a stumper for Goldberg:

If HG Wells (the preeminent leftwing intellectual of the first third of the 20th Century, evidently) was actually fascist, wouldn’t he have just called for Actual Fascism? It was, after all, all the rage at the time.

He didn’t because he didn’t think fascism was liberal. What he wanted, for better or worse, was an enlightened, benign alternative to the Plain-Jane, Here-I-Come-Czechoslovakia, Jackboots-n-Hugo Boss Fascism. In other words, he wanted to create something NEW, a liberal version of top-down autocracy. Not the kind the Nazis or Italians or the Falangalists were offering.

And even though he called for it, other liberals and lefties mocked him for it — and then promptly forgot it.

So how does this reflect the hidden impulse of anything? What does it matter if HG Wells called for an enlightened alternative to fascism and Hitler liked dogs? How on Earth does this have to do with Keynes?

If Goldload wants to say that Wells was the first to offer it, wouldn’t Wells motivation for uttering it AND THE RESULTS of his speech diametrically oppose Goldberg’s entire thesis?

Conservative white men who write critical reviews of Goldberg’s book are the kapos of liberal fascism.

Note that Austin Bramwell has an axe to grind.

Still, HAHAHA. HA!

Nice link, trilateral.

I think I may need to start paying attention to the American Conservative. I’ve seen several articles from there that are actually conservative, as opposed to Goldload’s disingenuous movement conservatism.

the Klan was less racist than we’ve been led to believe

From what the wingnuts tell me, the Klan was only racist during the Byrd years. They’ve been paragons of racial tolerance since.

Conservative white men who write critical reviews of Goldberg’s book are the kapos of liberal fascism.

hee hee.

Someone stop me.

I am getting entirely too much pleasure out of trolling over at the Captain’s Quarters. It’s like fish in a barrell over there.

If I didn’t know döughload was such a doughty chap, I’d say he’s liquid shit scared of the modern “fan boy cargo cult” (kargo kult?) KKK. The way he ties himself in knots to prove they’re not such bad guys after all screams “PLEASE DON’T HURT ME!”

Hats off to Mr. Neiwert for giving Herr LœdedHösen the drubbing he needs.

Seitz said,

January 25, 2008 at 1:19

the Klan was less racist than we’ve been led to believe

From what the wingnuts tell me, the Klan was only racist during the Byrd years. They’ve been paragons of racial tolerance since.

The only time the Klan was “less racist” was when they formed and fizzled out right after the Civil War. Back then, the only race they targeted was blacks. Since their revival around WWI, they decided to add Jews, Catholics, and anyone else who isn’t white to that list.

Trilateral Chairman said,

January 25, 2008 at 0:50

And now there’s this.

I have to say–this is *fun*.

I’ve only read the first sentence, and like it already:

“Not without reason was Jonah Goldberg’s Liberal Fascism widely expected to be a bad book.”

Righteous Bubba: HA! I’d forgotten that that’s who Austin Bramwell is. That’s one of the more entertaining fiskings I’ve encountered.

So yeah, he has an axe to grind, and he stands somewhere to the right of W…but still.

[…] Goddamn is this funny.  The best part about teh funny is that it is true, and accurate, and meets most standards of formal logic.   […]

The white male is the bohunk of Czech porn.

And thank dog for that! Really. Where does Higgins find those guys?

Since their revival around WWI, they decided to add Jews, Catholics, and anyone else who isn’t white to that list.

In places like Indiana Catholics and Jews were targeted because there simply weren’t enough brown people to hate. (Honest.)

And don’t tell JoLöad that in the 1990’s the completely harmless fan boy Klan Kult Klub burnt down a synagogue in Bloomington.

I have nothing funny or smart to add, as usual.

But I WILL say that I truly and sincerely bow down to your greatness.

And if I disagree with you (as if!) I will do my best to destroy you. I HATE people who need to be told what to think.

(Equals 33%.)

I just cannot believe in this age I have to deal with such moronitude.

*hiding all sharp objects*

In one of his “rebuttals” Goldough accuses Neiwert’s focusing on American Fascist groups such as KKK & Posse Comitus (?) of “returning like a dog to it’s vomit”.

An unnecessarily vile comparison… but I know I’ve heard or read it before somewhere. Now where did D’onah plagerize this from?

Considerably OT: I “helped” my daughter do a book report on James Schmitz “Witches of Karres” . She got an A! Yay Me!

So how does this reflect the hidden impulse of anything? What does it matter if HG Wells called for an enlightened alternative to fascism and Hitler liked dogs? How on Earth does this have to do with Keynes?

If Goldload wants to say that Wells was the first to offer it, wouldn’t Wells motivation for uttering it AND THE RESULTS of his speech diametrically oppose Goldberg’s entire thesis?

You, as well as Neiwert, are putting a lot more thought and effort into this than Goldberg did into his book. He got all hurt feelings because the fascists he reveres were being called fascists so he decided he’d show us all and decided in a fit of “I know you are but what am I?” that he’d write a book called Liberal Fascism and he went to Regnery and told him the title and dropped a few early 20th-century names that the editor there had never heard of so he figured it must be all like scholarly and stuff as well as being really Overton Window-ish and said “Liberal Fascism! Love it!” and it took Goldberg about 20 years to write it because it takes a long time to write 400 pages of total bullshit but he had a contract and he figured that he’d be called “thought-provoking” and “interesting” and “iconoclastic” at his mom’s cocktail parties and here we are.

Really. Where does Higgins find those guys?
Not to mention Duroy and about two dozen others.

Statistically speaking, either:

A) All Czech men are beautiful, or
B) All beautiful Czech men have done porn.

I’ve run the numbers myself.

What really boggles me is the pride & conceit Gold’ough expresses in his mess of a book. He constantly refers in a puffed-chest way to “my book addresses this” or “this subject is thoroughly covered in my book” (10 whole lines!). I skimmed thru the book, standing up in the bookstore (It wasn’t worth sitting and perusing). It made me ill, like smelling someones…vomit? (now where have I read that before?). To get the bad smell out of my sinus’ I purchased several Photoshop magazines, and one book. That cheered me.

I’m a very combative person, while also being very non-violent.

Jonah makes me hurt for those reasons. All that cognitive dissonance boils up and makes Jonah the Whale someone, if not the epitome of someone, whose face it would be fun to punch, or at least spit on.

Of course, he would then sue, immediately discounting anything he actually (allegedly) believed. And you just know he’s had lawyers on retainer since he was born.

So I’ll be good should I ever go to a book signing to hassle him.

Moreover, if the Klan PETA were less racist strident than we’ve been led to believe, academia the Humane Society was staggeringly more so. …

You just can’t argue with “logic” like that. Really, you just can’t.

Here is the best I can establish so far from Goldberg’s dreck: Liberals harbor a totalitarian temptation, but conservatives yield to that temptation. Liberals exercise self control, but conservatives lack any self control whatsoever. This is the real secret that Goldberg wishes to hide in his shamelessly deceptive propanganda.

DAMN those tags! Damn them all to hell!

Moreover, if the Klan PETA were less racist strident than we’ve been led to believe, academia the Humane Society was staggeringly more so. …

It previews ok…..

How can any sane person write something like this:

I keep waiting for someone … to make the case that progressivism [and liberalism] … aren’t really different names for the same ideology (which, again, isn’t to say that today’s liberalism/progressivism is identical to that of 80 years ago).

What on earth does this sentence mean? Even under the most generous possible reading, I still interpret him as saying that liberals are progressives and that liberals are not necessarily progressives. What kind of a mind can manage to assert A and not-A within the same sentence?

ARGHARRRRAGAHRRGRAGHHAGRH

Mr. Chairman,

He’s obviously uninitiated in the arcana of modus ponens and other esoterica like, um, logic. Those things are fascist so they don’t matter anyway.

Indeed, it is central to his pointyness.

Continuing with Jay B.’s point on Wells above at 1:05…Pedant Alert!

Goldberg has repeatedly pointed out the first half of his book’s title comes from an H.G. Wells’ speech given in 1932. He has also asserted on various occasions that Wells was one of the most important thinkers on the left in the early 20th century, thereby implying that his phrase “liberal fascism” must have been representative of a widely held position among socialist circles since Wells said it, or that it must have exercised considerable influence among them once he did.

As is usual with his cherry-picking for the classical liberal cause, Goldberg isn’t telling the whole story (or the right one). Wells rejected parliamentary democracy as a means to achieve the global utopia he envisioned, and he searched for an alternative, more authoritarian instrument by which to achieve his goal. He was impressed by the organizations that pushed the German and Italian fascist causes, particularly their leadership, and he determined his own political movement required a similar structure. He saw similarities between these and the leadership of the early Bolshevik regime in Russia. Wells was convinced an authoritarian elite or vanguard was necessary to lead, indeed, push a new global political regime into existence, and the fascist and communist vanguards served as his model for what he called a “competent receiver,” and elite corp that would advance the cause, or what Wells called an “open conspiracy.” This is what he referred to in 1932 as liberal fascism. In that same speech he also called this vanguard by other names: a liberal fascisti, a Liberal Communist Party, a greater Communist Party. It wasn’t these movements’ ideologies he sought to emulate but specifically their authoritarian, elitist structure as a means to an end. Also, in the early 1930s Wells objected to what he saw as significant errors in the Soviet Union, namely the emphasis on “class war” with the triumph of the proletariat as its proposed objective and the institutionalization of the party. It was because of this and because of the apparent success of fascist regimes during the same period that he gave greater attention to the German and Italian examples in writings subsequent to the 1932 speech. In the months after delivering the speech itself, Wells tried to sell his vanguardist cause first in the Labour Party and then in the Federation of Progressive Societies and Individuals, which was founded to propagate Wells’ ideas. His proposal fell on deaf ears; Wells failed to attract recruits to his Liberal Fascist/Liberal Communist Party cause, even among members of his own organization.

These things I learned from Philip Coupland’s “H.G. Wells’ ‘Liberal Fascism‘” (Journal of Contemporary History, 35:4 [2000], pp. 541-558). I imagine this is where Goldberg found the phrase, as I doubt he sought out the text of Wells’ speech or his other, later writings on the subject. Someone who has access to Goldberg’s discussion of Wells’ speech and the corresponding footnotes, please correct me if I’m wrong.

Niewert did a fabulous job, as did–

WTF?

“Tribune Media Services (his syndicate) has nominated our Jonah for a Pulitzer in opinion journalism.”

Nomineed by his syndicate? And that means?

“The second common mistake with a Pulitzer is the claim of being a nominee. Publishers “enter” work but the Pulitzer juries choose the nominated finalists from all the entries. Usually only three finalists or nominees are chosen per category. So should you ever meet a person claiming to be a Pulitzer Prize nominee, you may want to check it out before agreeing to let him be your agent especially if he quotes you a cost to read your words.”

Apparently on the right wing the standards for being a white racist are so high that no ordinary racist could possibly meet them.

Apparently, the kinds of things the Klan has done and to an extent still aims to do — dressing up in colorful super-villain outfits, naming yourself absurd outsized super-villain names (Exalted Cyclops, Grand Wizard) and murdering lots of black people, overthrowing elected governments, violently suppressing voting and campaigning, speaking and publishing public statements in favor of the extermination of other ethnic groups, religions, and ideologies, even plotting elaborate fire-based special effects in terrified citizens’ yards —- that’s not quite enough to really count as racist in their books.

Let’s say Jo’butt were right, and the Klan was less racist than generally we were led to believe.

Okay. Now, simply as a thought experiment, what would they be like if they had been more racist than we were led to believe?

Okay, now tell me: What would the Klan be like if they were maximally racist?

I mean, would they not truly be real, extreme racists unless: their every waking moment were involved in racially provocative acts, from the moment their eyes opened in their rebel-flag sheets ’til they closed their eyes to the soft tones of “Dixie”; their language were reduced to a truncated symbolic vocabulary consisting of nothing but ethnic slurs serving as all parts of speech, including a sign language of ethnic slur talk for deaf racists; their homes were constructed as giant, racially offensive symbols, say, a lawn jockey with a noose around its neck; and somehow even their food and beverages and paper products would have to be racially offensive?

What kind of standard is this?

Exactly how racist would a white man have to be in order to qualify among right wingers as being really, really racist?

I mean, let’s say some Klan member with godlike powers managed to not only exterminate every other race than ‘whites’ not only on Earth but throughout the entire Universe, and then went on to inscribe racist statements into the subatomic particle activities somehow, would this count as being maximally racist?

Or would that pale in comparison to one liberal white female student expressing a mild degree of support for some affirmative action program somewhere?

Trilateral Chairman,

Precisely. It is an affront to sanity.

I wouldn’t read the book, for the record, for great gobs of money.

Wait. That isn’t true. Yo, Jonah! I KNOW you read this stuff, given your necessarily fragile, nepotistic background, so how much will you pay me to read it? You’re rich by birth and job. You can afford it.

I’m mostly not a Dem, lean libertarian, hate being told what to do, think, or say; I vote third-party in almost every election that doesn’t matter (most of them, but, sadly, no!, not this one) and I can be persuaded. I was on Imus’ side. Me and The Rude Pundit. I’m a free-speech absolutist. Given our advances in alarm systems, I’m even for the repeal of the “fire in a crowded theater” exemption.

Send me a check, and I’ll do a fair Average Joe analysis. I want IN on the wingnut welfare scam!

In fact, I’m going to be truly evil here and give Jo’beak Goldbuzzard another money-making ideas he can get his Mommy and his right-wing nepotizers to help him with:

American Racist Idols.

Each year Jonuff and his crew criss-cross the nation looking for America’s most promising new racists.

Then, after a careful racist vetting process, we watch in High Definition Whitevision as a panel of 3 Certified Extreme White Supremacist judges put the entrance through their paces.

By the end of the season, we can finally crown America’s Top New Racist Idol! But we warn you — this isn’t your father’s racial competition. It takes a lot to be an Extreme Racist today, so make sure and sharpen up your racism skills so that you can really stand out from the crowd!

Thanks for a big laugh, El Cid.

I think you should seriously consider pitching that show. It doesn’t need any actual writers. Reality TV and all.

I think I may need to start paying attention to the American Conservative. I’ve seen several articles from there that are actually conservative, as opposed to Goldload’s disingenuous movement conservatism.

Ditto. I think this Austin Bramwell character and I would find much to disagree on politically, but the guy is forthright and intellectually honest, and I think I could have an entertaining and enlightening conversation with him. In short, he’s exactly the kind of conservative I thought didn’t exist online.

Oh, I’m sure Steyn Stain will be in on that.

Goldberg’s crackpot notion that he somehow has hurt liberal’s feelings is another example of his paranoid delusions. He didn’t hurt anyone feelings. He committed an obscene offense against decency and reason and logic. He confuses outrage at seeing reason and logic raped and murdered with bruised egos.

I can’t get the comments to work at Niewert’s blog, so I’ll say it here:

Wow. That is such a thorough takedown that spectators should bring a lunch and make a day of it.

Fozzetti said,

January 25, 2008 at 1:49

In one of his “rebuttals” Goldough accuses Neiwert’s focusing on American Fascist groups such as KKK & Posse Comitus (?) of “returning like a dog to it’s vomit”.

Posse Comitus is a group of anti-Semitic thugs.

The “Returning to vomit” quote is actually from Proverbs 26:11.

As usual, Jonah pulls out a non-sequitor to make the point that he has no point, which is central to his point.

…forthright and intellectually honest.

Too bad this is explicitly lacking in movement conservatism.

Goldberg’s crackpot notion that he somehow has hurt liberal’s feelings is another example of his paranoid delusions. He didn’t hurt anyone feelings. He committed an obscene offense against decency and reason and logic. He confuses outrage at seeing reason and logic raped and murdered with bruised egos.

Case study in projection.

#

Principal Blackman said,

January 25, 2008 at 2:36

I think I may need to start paying attention to the American Conservative. I’ve seen several articles from there that are actually conservative, as opposed to Goldload’s disingenuous movement conservatism.

Ditto. I think this Austin Bramwell character and I would find much to disagree on politically, but the guy is forthright and intellectually honest, and I think I could have an entertaining and enlightening conversation with him. In short, he’s exactly the kind of conservative I thought didn’t exist online.

It seems like they’re the last intellectuals left in the conservative movement. Austin’s articles make the point that intellectual laziness and “kill all Muslim” fever has made the American conservative a bad joke. The magazine is a raft of intelligence floating in a sea of stupidity… and Jonah is just one of the many sharks in the water.

Rick Massimo said,
…he decided he’d show us all and decided in a fit of “I know you are but what am I?” that he’d write a book called Liberal Fascism and he went to Regnery…

Sadly, no — he got it published by a major, mainstream publishing house called Doubleday … or as I will forevermore refer to it, Doughbleday.

Here’s another super-creepy thing about the modern American conservative movement: Most of my pretty liberal-to-libertarian and quite large family agreed (over the holidays when we were all together discussing these things) that we had gained a lot of respect for Pat Fucking Buchanan over the last several years.

Now THAT’S a conservative barometer. The consensus was that at least Pat was a sincere conservative. “Authentic,” in today’s parlance.

And we had some great laughs about it to boot.

The Internets, they always provide.

Mysterious, doughy blob clogs sewer

BoingBoing

“In Lewiston, Maine a 50-to-60-foot doughy mass is clogging a sewer line under the city’s main drag, and crews have been unable to budge it and have no idea what it is!”

200801241418City crews discovered the clog earlier this month after responding to complaints of blocked sewer lines downtown. Jones said crews opened a manhole at the Bates Street intersection and saw the clog – an oozing, white blob that looks like uncooked dough.

“We’ve tried punching through it, but each time we do, it just oozes back over the hole,” he said. “It really looks like dough.”

Sun Journal

“We’re not sure exactly what it is,” Public Services Director David Jones said Wednesday. “We’re just trying to get rid of it. We want it to stop clogging up our pipe.”

The clog starts in front of the United Baptist Church on Main Street and continues downhill to the Bates Street intersection. The sewer line that it’s in begins in front of Sam’s Italian Foods, according to Deputy Public Services Director Kevin Gagne.

He said the blockage affects six Main Street businesses between Bates and Blake streets – Wolf Eye Associates, the United Baptist Church, Sam’s Italian Foods, Classy Lady Boutique, PEG Associates and Pro-Print. No private dwellings are affected. Representatives from most of the businesses said Wednesday they had no problems with their sewer systems. A Sam’s employee wouldn’t comment on the situation. Executives from the restaurant, which serves pizza among other dishes, couldn’t be reached for comment Wednesday night.

The city has little choice but to replace the 12-inch diameter pipe, at a cost of between $40,000 and $60,000, Jones said.

“We have to go back in and pump out the manhole every eight hours,” he said. “We just can’t continue to do that until the spring. We have to do this work now.”

City crews discovered the clog earlier this month after responding to complaints of blocked sewer lines downtown. Jones said crews opened a manhole at the Bates Street intersection and saw the clog – an oozing, white blob that looks like uncooked dough.

This may be the end of civilization as we know it.

25 Doughbob jokes for the first person who finds Lewiston, Maine on Jonah’s book tour schedule …

If Jonah finds David so laughable and easily dismissed, seems like he should jump at the chance to debate him.

Unless, you know, he’s an idiot and a coward.

T SadlyNaughts:

This text is surrounded with STRIKE tags.

This text is surrounded with S tags.

Preview will always work, because it doesn’t filter your HTML at all. Don’t rely on the preview to see if a given tag works, because it doesn’t care.

It would be nice if the Sadly, No administrators would provide a list of permitted tags somewhere around the comment form to avoid the perennial botched strikeout jokes, follow-up posts explaining that it worked in preview, nosy bastards explaining which tags work and why preview doesn’t, &c. I would even be willing to experimentally determine such a list if one isn’t conveniently available for the administrators. No charge*.

This is a shameless bit of blogwhoring, but in honor of that crackhead that says he and Barack Obama has drugged up sexytime in the back of a limo, I have invited my readers to fill a comment thread with their made up stories of their involvement in celebrity scandals.

Here was my first go:

I would like to devote this thread to our made up fantasies of scandalous interactions with famous people.

I recall a night in 2003 when I ran into Canadian NeoCon Mark Steyn in a gay bath house, carrying a goat with its ass shaved.

“Have you seen Mickey Kaus?” he demanded before offering me a bump of crystal meth off a car key.

Come on, I know that Sadlynauts will be better at this than anyone.

http://www.iamtrex.com/?p=227

R Bubba posted this by Austin Bramwell:

http://www.amconmag.com/2006/2006_11_20/cover.html

Read it. It’s even better than his critique of DoPa. (Or, to complete
the declension, El DoPa.) It’s an intelligent conservative’s withering critique
of “movement conservatism,” and S,N! couldn’t have put it better their own bad selves.

I wrote a strongly worded letter calling for Gibson’s ass to be fired, for all the good it will do . . .

Ahhh, dammit.

Told my Neal Schon story what, two nights too early?

Dammit!

mikey

For those policy wonks out there, the FISA debate has been postponed until Monday:

After this morning’s vote, where the judiciary committee’s bill was killed by Republicans and a handful of Dems, a number of amendments were to be offered — among them, the Dodd/Feingold bill that would strip retroactive immunity. But the Republicans objected to any of these from coming up for a vote under simple majority rules.

Reid objected to [the move for cloture. Cloture here would legislate retroactive immunity] said that he would vote against it, and then postponed the vote until Monday.

It’s sad to see the Blue Dogs fucking it up for the rest of the country, but at least we have a real possibility to prevent telecomm immunity.

As for the GOP being the party of “Law and Order”; my ass. The Law says the telecomms have committed a crime. The Order says they have to go to trial for it. I guess it’s only “Law and Order” when individuals are being lawyered and ordered.

“If Goldload wants to say that Wells was the first to offer it, wouldn’t Wells motivation for uttering it AND THE RESULTS of his speech diametrically oppose Goldberg’s entire thesis?”

Yes it would. That in fact is central to his pointy head exploding.

Just paid the ol’ Uncle Sam. I truly now can say: black is the white of Polish agrarianism..

B/t/w, I know I’m using “polish” “agrarianism” and “words” in a sense different from their classical usage: indeed, I think this is why I keep losing my job.

cf: http://books.google.com/books?id=0IlVRg6M7jkC&pg=PA10&lpg=PA10&dq=%22polish+agrarianism%22&source=web&ots=_Xi5ZkQwm-&sig=rhV8-nGdKt19GtXkokteaWVj6m4

You, as well as Neiwert, are putting a lot more thought and effort into this than Goldberg did into his book. He got all hurt feelings because the fascists he reveres were being called fascists so he decided he’d show us all and decided in a fit of “I know you are but what am I?”

Yep. When I heard him speak, even I was surprised by the huge grudge he was toting.

His problem (or at least one of them) is he wasn’t content to write The Big Book o’ I Am Rubber n’ U R Glue. He keeps trying to engage in debate with people who actually know what the Hell they’re talking about and in the process reveals yet another layer of stupidity. Sometimes it’s almost sad.

the_millionaire_lebowski said,

January 25, 2008 at 3:37

As for the GOP being the party of “Law and Order”; my ass. The Law says the telecomms have committed a crime. The Order says they have to go to trial for it. I guess it’s only “Law and Order” when individuals are being lawyered and ordered.

The closest any GOP politician has been to “Law and Order” is Fred Thompson, because he used to act on that show.

Does this all not seem like some big exercise in using Momma’s friends and his wingnut enablers to get back at all those pointy-headed academics who didn’t find his ravings to be intellectually significant?

I wouldn’t entirely be surprised to find out one day that this stems from some essay question Jo’berg pulled out of his *ss in college which was graded badly, but which he was really, really attached to.

And unlike most frustrated students with bad arguments, weak comprehension, and an even worse lack of dedication to any intellectual rigor, he got his allies to carry his slack bag of impulsive pseudo-intellectual diarrhea into the public sphere for all to gag on.

nosy bastards explaining which tags work and why preview doesn’t

Are you lookin’ at me funny?

Another (sometimes) honest conservative’s (check the blog title) put-down of Facial Liberalism here.

Finally! An anti-immigration policy which goes right after the true root of our nation’s ills — our Minnesotans with funny names:

Immigration officials detaining, deporting American citizens

By Marisa Taylor | McClatchy Newspapers | Thursday, January 24, 2008

FLORENCE, Ariz. — Thomas Warziniack was born in Minnesota and grew up in Georgia, but immigration authorities pronounced him an illegal immigrant from Russia.

Immigration and Customs Enforcement has held Warziniack for weeks in an Arizona detention facility with the aim of deporting him to a country he’s never seen. His jailers shrugged off Warziniack’s claims that he was an American citizen, even though they could have retrieved his Minnesota birth certificate in minutes and even though a Colorado court had concluded that he was a U.S. citizen a year before it shipped him to Arizona.

On Thursday, Warziniack was told he would be released. Immigration authorities were finally able to verify his citizenship.

“The immigration agents told me they never make mistakes,” Warziniack said in a phone interview from jail. “All I know is that somebody dropped the ball.”

The story of how immigration officials decided that a small-town drifter with a Southern accent was an illegal Russian immigrant illustrates how the federal government mistakenly detains and sometimes deports American citizens…

…Unlike suspects charged in criminal courts, detainees accused of immigration violations don’t have a right to an attorney, and three-quarters of them represent themselves. Less affluent or resourceful U.S. citizens who are detained must try to maneuver on their own through a complicated system.

“It becomes your word against the government’s, even when you know and insist that you’re a U.S. citizen,” Siulc said. “Your word doesn’t always count, and the government doesn’t always investigate fully.”…

I read Dave’s takedown of teh Load this morning.

It was a thing of beauty, like watching Muhammad Ali fight… anybody.

El Cid said,

Sounds like 1984 to me, except anti-immigration policy is favored by the republicants, not the fasciliberals. How to explain such a dilemma?

I wouldn’t entirely be surprised to find out one day that this stems from some essay question Jo’berg pulled out of his *ss in college which was graded badly, but which he was really, really attached to.

Goldberg’s grudge definitely has some roots in his college experience.

LIBERAL FASCISM, YET AGAIN
On Monday I wrote about how Americans are terrified of being “judgmental” except when it comes to condemning the judgers. Herewith a case in point. The American Council of Trustees and Alumni reported that 453,123 college newspapers were either destroyed or stolen between 1992 and 1998. Overwhelmingly, the papers were conservative. College Presidents regularly refuse to condemn or punish students who do this sort of thing, especially when the perpetrators are minority or gay rights groups. If conservative kids were going around burning or burying the Crunchy Gazette or the Birkenstock Times they would be expelled and we’d get reports on the nightly news about “Brown Shirts at Bennington.”

From the Goldberg File, January 8, 1999.

Another (sometimes) honest conservative’s (check the blog title) put-down of Facial Liberalism here.

My favorite sentence from Withywindle’s review:

There are real distinctions to be made among the various “collectivist” ideologies, and a book, a man, or an ideology that cannot discriminate among them is of limited utility either for historical understanding or political guidance.

The ideology in question is Goldberg’s “Hayekian classical liberalism.” Ouch.

being “judgmental” except when it comes to condemning the judgers.

SEE! LIBERALS ARE INTOLERANT OF INTOLERANCE!!!!!

Goldberg also displays the contempt for intellectuals (“The Guild”) common to Fascism.

Does this all not seem like some big exercise in using Momma’s friends and his wingnut enablers to get back at all those pointy-headed academics who didn’t find his ravings to be intellectually significant?

…as well as all those people who called him a fascist over the years. Yes.

Here’s the thing that convinced me: When Jon Stewart was slapping him around about gay marriage, he shot back that he was sympathetic to it in the book. But if you’re arguing about liberals/progressives vs. conservatives, the opinions of one conservative named Jonah aren’t that relevant (just as the opinions of one liberal named Al aren’t that relevant). We’d instead be interested in the *general* position of each party. In this case, the conservatives are clearly against gay marriage, which clearly shows their willingness to mess around in people’s personal lives, which is (I think) fascist in his definition of the term. He didn’t respond by arguing that *conservatives* aren’t fascists; he responded by arguing that *he’s* not a fascist, which is a fairly telling confusion.

Only an idiot talks about the Klan being “less racist than we’ve been lead to believe”.

At some point, you cross a threshold and fine distinctions no longer matter. The Klan has always been on the wrong side of that threshold. That they didn’t burn as many crosses as some people might think or didn’t lynch as many innocents as you might think from watching the movies is irrelevant; once you’ve engaged in those behaviors AT ALL, the number of times you do them becomes irrelevant, at least in terms of how racist they are.

I think what Jonah was trying to say is that the Klan is less influential then is commonly believed, and he’s just such an awful writer, and so stuck in the mind-set of a particularly stupid brand of conservativism, that he just can’t articulate himself.

On another subject, I went to his blog, and found this gem (The italics are a quote from Mr. Neiwert, the normal text is Jonah’s reply):

The cult of tradition.

[Who are the folks who beat their breasts (and ours) incessantly over the primacy of ‘traditional Judaeo-Christian culture’?]

Uh huh. First, Judeo-Christian culture isn’t a “cult” it’s like, you know, our culture.

Whelp, my head just exploded from the idiocy, so I guess I better wrap this post up.

Thomas Warziniack was born in Minnesota and grew up in Georgia

I was going to make a Stalin joke but I don’t have the heart. I’ve known too many innocent people who have been deported by Homeland Security. One woman, a close friend of my boyfriend’s family, was recently deported after her husband was killed in Iraq, because he could no longer sponsor her on her immigration application. A few years ago a friend who is like a grandmother to me was taken into custody after she went to the emergency room for medical treatment. She had overstayed her visa to look after her son, who is her only living relation.

My boyfriend and I live in Massachusetts, and would like to get married, but can’t because I can’t sponsor him and the feds might cancel his visa in retaliation.

I feel nauseous every time I am reminded of the whole crummy system.

Goldberg: Don’t listen to Neiwert, he’s a stupid head.

Neiwert: You’re a stupid head, because you suck on the lead soldering of your plumbing, light fireworks in your nose, trade your dollar for $.04, smoke cigarettes, eat McDonald’s, play in the freeway, hit your hand with a sledge hammer, and stab yourself with steak knives.

Goldberg: Neiwert’s a stupid head because he doesn’t know “hot” really means “cold”. Plus he has stupid hair, and hair is attached to the head. Stupid!

(Hmm. On second thought, that last argument may be too sophisticated for the ol’ Pantload.)

Fozzetti said,

An unnecessarily vile comparison… but I know I’ve heard or read it before somewhere. Now where did D’onah plagerize this from?

I claim he found it here.

Just that it would be so unlike The Loady One to be lurking on a site that’s making fun of his delicately crafted turd. But, as Goldbrick himself said, “Conservatism, quite simply, is a mess these days.” Indeed, this is central to my point.

“Conservatism, quite simply, is a mess these days.”

Pikchure with musik.

I got a chuckle, of sorts — combined with the urge to smash rotten vegies into the Pantload’s smarmy face — from one of his responses to Dave Neiwert, which (translated into actual English) read, approximately, “Your critique of Paragraph X of my book is refuted by Paragraph X of my book.”

kicking the ass-dicking felch-choad out of Jonah Goldberg

I hereby surrender any bragging rights I might have, or might have ever had, to overly-descriptive obscene adjectives. In the United States or its Territories, or the known universe. Signed, Me.

“Conservatism, quite simply, is a mess these days.”

Pikchure with musik.

“Let me ask you something…”

“Thomas Warziniack was born in Minnesota and grew up in Georgia”

Yeah, we’ve got quite a few Russian emigrés here. I see the little old Russian ladies when I go to the food shelf, feeling up the bread and loading up their wire baskets. We also took in a lot of Somalians too, probably more than most other states. They are doing quite well as far as I can tell. When I take the bus I just marvel at the sumptuous fabrics the women wear. The old timer immigrants, the Hmong, also did well for themselves. Right up my street are several blocks of Asian grocers and restaurants one right ofter the other, mostly Hmong or Lao with some Chinese thrown in. But where they really shine is at the farmers markets especially right downtown Minneapolis. Not so much right now of course since it’s like, 15 below fricken zero right now (and 30 below up north, ahh… good times) but in the summer they are out there with tables over flowing with fruit and veggies every Thursday. Hopefully we will be giving Pawlenty a swift boot to the ass as soon as we can too. Welcome to fascist Minnesota.

Hopefully we will be giving Pawlenty a swift boot to the ass as soon as we can too.

I will light a candle towards that effort.

Regarding the dog and vomit thing: I figured Doughy was being CLEVAR and referring to Kipling.

I just thought you all should know that Ben Domenech of RedState has just endorsed Batman for president. Let down by his real-life imaginary dad, Fred Thompson, he did what any tough guy Republican would do – curl up in the fetal position, plant his thumb in his mouth and wait for a comic book hero to come and rescue him.

Here are the “positions” that he imagines the pitching half of the ambiguously day duo might run on:

* Unflinching pursuit of the enemy.
* Deliverer of violent righteous justice.
* Believes in capital punishment for rape and for wearing underwear outside your pants.
* Absolutely willing to scare, beat, and torture the vile to save the lives of the innocent.
* Hates hippies, bad folk music, and corruption.
* Believes in revitalizing the inner city through capitalism and two-fisted justice.
* Wants to be left the hell alone to worship when, what, and how Batman chooses.
* Believes in protecting innocent human life from conception until he or the state puts it to death.
* If you come into his house, he wants to use any weapon he pleases against you, including ones he invented, permits be damned.
* Zionist.
* Clearly opposed to the death tax.
* Richer than God, and no, he’s not ashamed of it.
.

Oh, lookee he has a facebook page ‘n everything!

Told my Neal Schon story what, two nights too early?

What Neil Schon story, mikey? Is Carlos involved? Steve Perry?

Damn, people! Where are you all? We are experiencing some serious storms tonight. Tim (the other one) – are you all keeping dry up the hill there?

Sorry you missed it DA.

Here’s the story.

And who knows. It coulda happened…

mikey

Damn, mikey – that story made my day. Like, I can picture exactly how it happened. Fuckin’ Marin. Although I’m surprised it wasn’t Mill Valley.

About listening to the grassroots who had been sold down the river on immigration and other issues, and taking dead aim at the enemies of conservatism, starting with Michael Moore and moving down the line.

This is what Republicans *want* from their ideal candidate: a guy who will take on Michael Moore. Lol.

Jesus they are total fucking morons. All the shit that is wrong in the world today and their wet-dream made real is a guy who will call Moore fat.

Note how they phrase it. Not making America better or even fighting America’s enemies. Nope, just fighting the enemies of conservatism. Talk about your small-minded goals.

Half those Batman positions are wrong anyway. These guys can even fuck up daydreaming.

Batman is for capital punishment? Kind of makes you wonder why he’s thrown the Joker into prison like 50 times then, even after he molested Jim Gordon’s daughter and killed his wife…

“Tim (the other one) – are you all keeping dry up the hill there?”

Pretty rockin’ ‘aint it g ?

Yeah, I never knew Batman was a Zionist either. Or such a big fan of torture. Or that he doesn’t mind destroying innocent life as long as only he and “the state” can do it. Maybe it was some sort of “evil twin Batman” gimmick that I missed.

after awhile, when you’re wearing that bat costume, things go to your head…

Also, doesn’t Batman himself wear underwear outside his pants? And he believes in capital punishment for that?

Arky – Chuthuhlusexual said,

If I didn’t know döughload was such a doughty chap, I’d say he’s liquid shit scared of the modern “fan boy cargo cult” (kargo kult?) KKK. The way he ties himself in knots to prove they’re not such bad guys after all screams “PLEASE DON’T HURT ME!”

Someone here said it a while ago, but I’d love to see Goldberg go up to a Klan/Neo-Nazi/Hammerskin rally and call them a bunch of liberals.

J- said,
Wells was convinced an authoritarian elite or vanguard was necessary to lead, indeed, push a new global political regime into existence, and the fascist and communist vanguards served as his model for what he called a “competent receiver,” and elite corp that would advance the cause, or what Wells called an “open conspiracy.”

Holy shit. HG Wells was a Randian? Or was Rand a Wellsian…?

As for Batman…

He was never about justice, really. He was about vengeance. Figures that a right-winger wouldn’t know the difference.

Also, I don’t think any case can be made that Batman was anti-choice, but he was certainly not pro-feminist according to this TV spot.

http://video.aol.com/video-detail/batgirl-saves-batman-and-robin-without-equal-pay/1303855472

(Can anyone here imagine this commercial running today?)

In fact there have been multiple storylines where Batman had either an “evil twin” or was on drugs that caused him to act like a crazy conservative. Then the real liberal Batman showed up to save the day. (I’m thinking specifically of the Azrael stuff and the Venom arc or Legends of the Dark Knight)

Do these guys know that Batman totally swore off using guns?

This review of Liberal Suckism is quite good:

http://www.amconmag.com/2008/2008_01_28/review.html

Superhero comics are weird, because they tend to have a semi-fascist world-view.

Marvel’s big giant super comics event, Civil War, vilified anybody who believed that people should not have the right to disguise themselves, break into your house, assault you and wantonly destroy your property simply because they have the power to be able to do it.

Anybody who wanted to put official checks on superhero power was a bad guy and a dick.

It’s interesting to me, because A) It’s clear in real life that extra-legal, anonymous militias are NOT a good way to promote justice, and, B) I think I’d be less likely to be The Thing, and more likely to be the guy who can’t drive myself to work anymore because The Thing threw my car at Dr. Doom.

In other words, superhero comics ask you to take on the point of view of the elites who would harm you, and vilify, essentially, your own self.

It’s fascinating.

Christopher said,
January 25, 2008 at 9:08

Superhero comics are weird, because…

Is your last name “Hitchens?”

somebody shouldn’t have just taught me this

Survey says?

Survey says: 9 out of 10 Sadly, No!sians believe that Pinko Punko should not have access to strikethrough.

Yay for being the lone dissenter!

And yay for missing the conversation. Again.

mikey–beautiful! My guitarist Mom dragged me to a Journey concert when I was 12 because she thought she’d look too “old” to go alone. She would have killed to see them. We mainly saw far away little dots that could somehow make Journey songs play.

I’m just really happy that the masks are falling off of all of these midwestern WASPs. At first it was kind of cute when they kept saying I was just like Eva Longoria on Desperate Housewives, but that turned out to not really be a compliment…..I think I’m going to refugee to FLA. permanently and take my chances with that KKK branch. At least there people will not ask me when I’m landscaping if “the owner of the house is home”…..ROFL….I loved that one.

Survey says?

Survey says: Ding ding ding!

Hey, what happened to my tags? Those dings were supposed to be underlined. I swear it worked in preview!

…doesn’t Batman himself wear underwear outside his pants? And he believes in capital punishment for that?

Batman doesn’t wear pants, so it’s okay.

Hey, what happened to my tags? Those dings were supposed to be underlined. I swear it worked in preview!

You have to press your tongue to your teeth.

OK Eww.

It’s a happy world where you can read comics and go to the movies, then get paid to turn it into a bowl of partisan mush. You just know that Jonah reviewed Cloverfield because he decided to blow off work and go to the movies, and then forced himself to crank out a junior high-level review with the obligatory Conservative Message and lame swipes at liberals.

OT but did anyone else notice that Wolfie’s back?

You just know that Jonah reviewed Cloverfield…

Thanks, that was amusing. He really wants it both ways, doesn’t he?

Shorter JGold:
I correctly note that those effete egghead liberal movie reviewers need to stop overanalyzing shit and enjoy a good bone-crunching monster movie for all of of its nuanced psychological overtones and deep historical significance.

Even shorter:
US : WWII Japan :: Al Qaeda : US

As an actual, fer-reals comic-book geek, I gotta say that I doubt the Red State guys have ever actually read a Batman comic.

Here are the things he gets right:

* Unflinching pursuit of the enemy.
* Deliverer of violent righteous justice.
* Absolutely willing to scare, beat, and torture the vile to save the lives of the innocent.
* If you come into his house, he wants to use any weapon he pleases against you, including ones he invented, permits be damned.
* Richer than God, and no, he’s not ashamed of it.

And here’s the stuff he gets really, really wrong:

* Believes in capital punishment for rape and for wearing underwear outside your pants.

No, not a bit. Not even a little. This is an utterly bizarre statement, as anyone with even a little knowledge of Batman knows that his old costume was the underwear-on-the-outside model. And he hangs out with Superman, who still wears the classic underwear costume. Domenich is stupid.

* Hates hippies, bad folk music, and corruption.

Again, utterly bizarre, and with no connection to anything that ever appeared in the comics.

* Believes in revitalizing the inner city through capitalism and two-fisted justice.

Sure, if by “capitalism,” you mean “extensive charity work.”

* Wants to be left the hell alone to worship when, what, and how Batman chooses.

Technically true, but I don’t think that means what Domenich thinks it means. It doesn’t mean that Batman wants to beat people up for not worshiping his preferred god.

* Believes in protecting innocent human life from conception until he or the state puts it to death.

Batman don’t kill.

* Zionist.

Nope.

* Clearly opposed to the death tax.

Not clear at all, as the issue has never been raised in the comics.

I am pretty sure, however, that Batman is on record as wanting to kick lying plagiarists’ asses…

How funny–Jonah’s review has much in common with Ty Burr’s review in the Boston Globe. Not that I’m saying he’s a lying plagarist too, of course. Still–

Burr: The math is preposterously easy, actually: “Cloverfield” equals “Godzilla” divided by “The Blair Witch Project.”

Jonah: As many have noted, it’s sort of The Blair Witch Project meets Godzilla.

[That’s fair, at least he attributes the phrase.]

Burr: They’re young, good-looking, generically hip, and played by unknowns who share those qualities. I kept waiting for Scooby-Doo to turn up

Jonah: A bunch of vacuous twenty-something hipster doofuses are at a party in Lower Manhattan when a critter that looks like a cross between Godzilla and a praying mantis attacks the city.

[A little Burr, a little Seinfeld…]

Burr: “Cloverfield” captures the chronic self-absorption of the Facebook generation with breathless, cleverly recycled media savvy, and then it stomps that self-absorption to death.

Jonah: It’s Godzilla for the MySpace generation and nothing more.

[Bingo! But Jonah thought up the movie’s message all on his own.]

Burr: It’s a short, efficient, terrifying monster movie, no more and no less.

Jonah: The message of the film is that such youthful feelings of permanent bliss can be rendered an illusion in an instant. In the wake of 9/11 and with the very real possibility that the first city to be nuked after Nagasaki and Hiroshima may well be New York, that strikes me a message worth pondering, even from a “Godzilla movie.”

[So the message is you, too, can be dead instantly? Jonah needs to worry about the Islamofascistgojira less, and the fat and carbohydrates more. No wonder he resents Whole Foods.]

At least there people will not ask me when I’m landscaping if “the owner of the house is home”

A melanin enhanced family friend owned several houses in what may be the most insanely overpriced area in the region. Melanin enhanced residents who didn’t have personal guards and nine cameras around the door were non-existent in this neighborhood. FotF lived in the largest house and if you went to visit and you were also melanin enhanced he made you help him with his favorite hobby (or at least watch):

Step 1: Sit on the front step waving at the tourist trolleys.
Step 2: Smoke, have a drink.

Eventually a foot patrol comprised of two officers will amble by and ask who he is, what he’s doing, where the owner was.

Step 3: Go into the worst imitation of a Vaudville negro complete with Yassuhs, Nawsuhs, rolling of eyes offers to dance and shine the officers’ shoes.

Depending on the intelligence/belligerence of officers:

Step 4a: Laugh as the cops hurried away.
Step 4b: Get into an escalating dispute with the police about who owned what, where he was allowed to sit and relevant city laws and codes. Unwilling participants may smile, stare in awe and/or wonder if they’re going to wind up in jail.

Step 5: Drink to another victory over the police.

I think they gave that patrol to rookies because as long as I knew him, he never ran out of cops to annoy.

You have to press your tongue to your teeth.

Thanks for the tip, sadly nosy bastard.

mikey-

what about Geddy Lee? Or at least Alice Cooper?

Lex and Arky,

I know people who actually don’t believe that the sort of racial profiling you describe really happens. You probably won’t be surprised to hear that they’re all melanin-challenged.

I’m a white woman. My skin only has pigment in the form of freckles, and not much of that, because I avoid the sun. For years, I’ve driven the same car. At one point, my tail light was cracked, and I didn’t fix it because a) I’m lazy and b) I’m poor. Never once was I pulled over for it. I’m talking a period of four years or so, both in Iowa and in Washington.

2004: I’m in a relationship with a Latino. He sometimes drives my car. He always drives if we go out, since he never drinks and I, um, do. We were pulled over repeatedly in burbs I’d driven in frequently over the years. Reason? Tail light. Over and over. Well, we fixed it of course, and then we got pulled over because a cop didn’t like the way the tags were stuck on the plate. Always let go with a warning, but still! Driving While Brown was the reason. We just don’t go to those burbs much these days.

I loved your account of your friend taunting the cops, Arky. It was funny and I laughed. But there is part of me that just can’t laugh at this stuff, and is bitterly resentful about it. It’s fucked up.

I think Domenech is just a really bad writer. Thus:

* Believes in capital punishment for rape and for wearing underwear outside your pants.

… might be an attempt at two separate thoughts, i.e. “Batman believes in capital punishment for rape.” And: “Batman is for wearing underwear outside your pants.”

But probably not. This one, though, is clearly confusing:

* Believes in protecting innocent human life from conception until he or the state puts it to death.

Batman believes in protecting innocent human life from being conceived? That’s how it reads …

“Indeed, Liberal Fascism reads less like an extended argument than as a catalogue of conservative intellectual clichés, often irrelevant to the supposed point of the book.”

I thought everyone would enjoy the above summary statement from the American Conservative critique of DoughBob’s waste of ink and trees.

My summary statement is that Loady’s prose and grammar are so circuitous that it is almost impossible to follow an idea through the course of a single sentence. When I was a teaching assistant in grad school, this approach was known as an attempt to baffle with bullshit; I didn’t fall for it then and it ain’t working now Loadyboy. BS is BS, no matter how many big words you got off your Word-a-day calendar you moron.

PS. I know you are reading this, Mr. Mommy Got Me a Good Job; you are too much of an immature narcisist not too!

Candy–wow! My very white grandmother was just here visiting and kept being shocked by my statements during the debates and about other racial things…..ROFL….she just doesn’t get it that whites don’t see me as white. Only black people see me as white. It’s great.

Also, did you know that humans have equal amounts of melanin but some less activated than others? I used to stay out of the sun but now I get as dark as I can just to piss people here off….LOL…..and because I’m lazy and like to listen to my iPod at the pool.

OMG…Arky, we could all start a really obnoxious brigade. After one neighbor kid kept calling me “Mexican” I just stopped speaking English and would only speak Spanish around her and the neighbors (these kids’ Moms are ALL evangelicals and it seems closeted bigots). The thing is, I don’t speak Spanish. My Abuelo wouldn’t let any of us learn it because he was afraid if we spoke it we’d be discriminated against…..LOL….so I just talked like Dora the Explorer but with an American accent. Soy Lex. Cono tu madre.

Then that kid started to point and yell from other yards “dirty Mexican!!!” (she was only 5!!), so I would just point and yell at the top of my lungs “dirty _____” whatever inapplicable nationality came to mind. Estonian, Australian, Colombian, whatever.

I finally had to confront her (Bob Jones Educated) Dad about it because she kept beating up my then-3-year-old and he insisted that they weren’t racist. His defense was that, “We had a party for her (one of their 8 kids) and we invited everyone in her class, even the black girl!”.

Yeah, they are now paying two mortgages because this house won’t sell but I ran them off. All of the incense and rainbow flags and Patti Smith etc. just was too much. So much for Pottery Barn Ruby Ridge!

On the upside I realized that no bigotry can be rationalized and stopped being the official online defender of Pamela Geller et al…..ROFL….see? Always a silver lining.

Moreover, if the Klan was less racist than we’ve been led to believe, academia was staggeringly more so. …

Moreover, if global warming was real, unicorns would be air conditioned…

Batman is for capital punishment? Kind of makes you wonder why he’s thrown the Joker into prison like 50 times then, even after he molested Jim Gordon’s daughter and killed his wife…

Notably, there’s a Batman story whose title I cannot remember where he works to save the Joker from the electric chair because the Joker did not in fact commit the crime that earned him the death penalty.

(Aside: the Joker crippled Gordon’s daughter– the “molested” part is sort of left up in the air.)

Re: the Domenech/Batman thing.

There’s every possibility that he didn’t write it. I consider myself an authority, since I was the first guy to blow the whistle on him at Daily Kos and resulting kerfuffle there brought me my 15 minutes of internet fame and about half that amount of time as a “Trusted User” before I pissed someone off and lost it.

Re: the Mikey/Journey thing.

No way in hell that isn’t true. Parse that, bitches!

Re: the Melanin Challenged thing.

Awesome.

If you click on the Batman logo it sends you to “Batman for President.” I couldn’t find any indication of authorship on the site. Ben does not say he’s quoting the site, as far as I can tell.

The libertarian Reason isn’t bad either, in terms of intellectually honest conservatives.

Batman for President has a Facebook group, which lists Domenech as its creator and administrator.

I guess one can take this attempt at political humor as final confirmation, if any were needed, that Red State has failed to make itself into the Daily Kos of the right.

Taxonomists are caused by global warming.

R Bubba posted this by Austin Bramwell:
http://www.amconmag.com/2006/2006_11_20/cover.html

Sample quote:

He grants that some of his points are trivial and others may appear outrageous, so that nothing he says should be taken as both true and interesting at the same time.

Is that quotable, or what?