Whole Lott O’ Love (Brief Refrain)
Posted on November 27th, 2007 by Gavin M.
Well this is certainly settled:
Escort Throws Cold Water On Lott Rumor
November 26, 2007 11:14 PMA San Antonio-based gay male escort categorically denied Monday that outgoing GOP Sen. Trent Lott had ever procured his services, putting to bed one of the more stunning rumors to emerge following Lott’s announcement earlier in the day that he was leaving Congress.
After all, it’s not like the GOP would attempt to cover up such a thing.
Above (l-r): Trent Lott, Larry Craig
Did Lott give a reason for quitting? If he blathered the usual “time with family/private sector” GOP line, it would give the rumors some cred.
Plus, it’s been like, what, a week and a half since a Republican family valuist got outed, right? What’s with the delay?
This rumor proves that the driveby media is out to get Republicans, they had absolutely no proof to back up there insane assumptions. Thank heavens for the New Media.
Ah, hell, make it a trio and you might have something:
http://www.chrisburke.org/
“This rumor proves that the driveby media is out to get Republicans…”
Yeah, who could possibly believe that a loudmouthed, bigoted right-winger was secretly gay?
“Thank heavens for the New Media.”
I agree. Without bloggers, we would not now have pics of every Congressional gay-baiter posing with Senator Wide Stance.
Which imagine do you think is creepier:
1) Trent Lott vigorously schtupping a male escort with his toupe perfectly in place and never moving
or
2) Trent Lot vigorously schtupping a male escort while his toupe watches enviously from the nightstand and the metal snaps no doubt implanted in Lott’s scalp (for the affixing of the envious toupee) glinting evilly in the candlelight with each thrust?
jacob m said,
November 27, 2007 at 10:06
Which imagine do you think is creepier:
1) Trent Lott vigorously schtupping a male escort with his toupe perfectly in place and never moving
or
2) Trent Lot vigorously schtupping a male escort while his toupe watches enviously from the nightstand and the metal snaps no doubt implanted in Lott’s scalp (for the affixing of the envious toupee) glinting evilly in the candlelight with each thrust?
Thank you. With that imagery you have just ruined the rest of my life.
BTW, Saul?
Drive-by Media?
Do you Dittoheads have even ONE original thought?
Trent Lott’s nephew was a prof of mine in undergrad. He looked like a cross between Trent and Quentin Tarantino, had nothing in common with him politically, n taught reasonably well.
In other not really related personal trivia, in boarding school I knew guy named Rich White. No lie.
When I first heard the latest “I’m a gay-hating Republican politician/closet dick sucker” rumor about Lott, I thought it was too good to be true.
That’s exactly what I said when the Ted Haggard scandal broke, but I digress.
As a gay man, I’d like to speak for all the Sadly ‘Mos and say “Take him back. We don’t want him.”That’s if of course these rumors are true.
Until then, I ask all Republicans to remain calm, eat your apple pie while reading Newsmax’s latest reporting on ancient Clinton non-scandals and please, by all means, rally around Old Glory Hole. Er, or something like that.
Didn’t he say he was quitting to become an environmental lobbyist, because he’s sad about all the oak trees knocked over by Hurricane Katrina? Also, lobbying rules are changing soon, so he wants to get his while the gettin’s good. He’ll have to wait two yrs. to lobby the Senate if he resigns after the end of the yr. If he goes before, he only has to wait one yr.
NYT: He lost his home here to Hurricane Katrina, then struggled with his insurance company as thousands of others here did, something he said had spurred him on as an advocate for storm victims.
Malkin sez he won’t be missed & should get out now. She’s just never happy, is she? A veritable rage-grrl.
the envious toupee
Either the name of a band, or the title of Edward Gorey’s last book.
Well, we’ll check our files on him, Marco, but if he’s even been with a black man, then I’m afraid that he can never go back. To women. It voids the warranty.
Won’t anyone think of the Hasterts?
I’m hearing stories that they are about to enact some ethics reforms that would require members of Congress to wait two years after leaving before becoming lobbyists, so Lott wants to get out while he can still get on the gravy train.
Haven’t yet consulted the Great Gazoogle on that one.
OH FUCK YOU
Clearly, both Craig and Lott know how to, err, handle a mic, but when the Senator from Mississippi is found “cross-dressing”, it generally refers to this, and not this
You need coolin’
Baby I’m not foolin’.
Gonna send ya
Back to schoolin’.
What Teh TeeVee taught me: If Lott leaves before the first of the year he can duck the new lobbying restrictions but he runs afoul of Mississippi state law that requires a special election within 100 days if a Senator splits in a non-election year. So, Lott either stays til next year (and then has to wait an extra year before becoming a lobbyist) or he pulls the cord now and forces the GOP to spend a pile of cash that they don’t have on a special election to fill his seat for a year.
Personally, I ain’t buyin’ the whole “quit before the lobbying rules change” bit. Lott himself acknowledged in his statement that the restriction on Members and Senators becoming lobbyists (one year currently, becomes 2 years in Jan.) only means that the lobbying firms bring the former elected in as “consultants” who tell the firm who to call and what to say rather than directly lobbying themselves.
My bet is that this connects somehow with Larry Flynt’s recent announcement that he is about to drop a giant what’s-in-his-underwear-drawer bomb on a sitting US Senator.
Shorter Benjamin Nicholas: I may be a whore, but I’ve got standards.
In other news, jacob m is teh evil.
Do you Dittoheads have even ONE original thought?
Trick question as it assumes they actually have “thoughts.”
kingubu: I also favor the Larry Flynt story theory. In fact, I pray fervently every night to the Sky Fairy in Which I Don’t Believe that it be true.
It seems to me that if it were just the lobbying gig, Lott would have found a less startling way of announcing it. Funny his announcement uses the word “opportunity”, which makes it a little different from the usual “spending time with my family” ruse.
The fact that it came so abruptly and with such a short-term date for stepping down makes it suspicious. And the guy just ran for re-election, what, last year? Whatever the reason is, it obviously just came up recently, and made him change his plans.
Hey, happy birthday, g.
So is the impending Larry Flynt bombshell related to the LA Times’ insistence that it’s NOT sitting on a story about someone in power? Or are these two different scandals-in-waiting?
Isn’t the escort making the denials the same one who took the guy who ratted out the most Reverend Ted Haggard to task, effectively telling the boy “Once the check clears, what happens in you anus stays in your anus”?
md
thanks, kingubu
The fact is, liberals are obsessed with gayness, and will do anything to support their own, but kick Republican gays to the curb as they disprove their stereotypes and indicate that conservatism is a big tent, unlike liberals who are biased against things they don’t like.
…he pulls the cord now and forces the GOP to spend a pile of cash that they don’t have on a special election to fill his seat for a year.
Wait a sec. Lott’s seat is pretty safe for the GOP, isn’t it? And why would the GOP have to pay for the election anyway?
So far I think that this is just a rats-off-a-sinking-ship moment for Lott, but I’ll be interested to see if there’s anything more out there.
Actually, Gary, liberals judge people on behavior, not status. Being gay doesn’t get you a pass if you behave badly. Only a fool would support people based on something as shallow as orientation or pigmentation or professions of beliefs not truly held. But then, I guess The Rev. Pat Robertson sees the real good in Rudy, not just another ticket to suck on the White House teat.
md
Really, Fake Gary? Liberals are obsessed with homosexuality?
http://www.conservapedia.com/Homosexuality
Wait a sec. Lott’s seat is pretty safe for the GOP, isn’t it? And why would the GOP have to pay for the election anyway?
Yep, probably safely GOP in any case but every campaign– even in friendly territory– costs money. And, given the existing fundraising gap, (funny how they can’t seem to raise much cash now that the DeLay/Abramoff dirty money machine is dismantled) I can’t imagine that the national party is too happy about having to spend the extra dollars.
Happy birthday to g!
Wait, “conservapedia” is real? How much worse can things get? Fuck!
He looked more like he makes Lindsey Graham his pony-boy, anyway.
Damn you for making me click the link to that conservapedia page. It’s packed so full of pseudo-science, willful misreadings, outdated stereotypes, warmed-over bigotry, scaremongering, discredited theology, wool-over-your-eyes legalese, blatant slander, and literally hundreds of worthless footnotes that it made my eyes bleed.
Trick question as it assumes they actually have “thoughts.”
Nope. Just facts.
How much worse can things get? Fuck!
Have you seen Media Mythbusters?
Lex, I point you to teh Conservapedia usage statistics. As I said on my journal, that’s all you need to know about the conservative movement, ever.
Conservapedia usage statistics
Ha. I hadn’t seen that before. Thanks, Simba B.
Oh crimeny! I again beg forgiveness for ever consorting with such people. Having met real live conservative wingnuts, I now know the depth of their madness, or at least I think I know until you guys show me more. Egads, it’s like this new channel that just popped up on my cable menu, “JCTV”. Kirk Cameron is back, and now he’s nuts!
FORGIVE!!
PLEASE!!
FORGIVE!!
Ryan Grim of the Politico has compiled a highlight list of Lott quotes. My favorite: “The spirit of Jefferson Davis lives in the 1984 Republican platform.”
I wonder how long the rank-and-file will continue believing the GOP’s schtick about “family values.” It’s transparently obvious that they don’t believe it, given that the party pantheon contains any number of divorces, including two (Giuliani and Gingrich) who were unspeakably cruel to the wives they were discarding. Then you’ve got the innumerable gay men in the ranks, not to mention the occasional gambler like Bill Bennett.
The GOP’s approach is usually pretty simple. Their candidate will get up and mouth some words about traditional marriage, strong families, etc. Social conservatives, who love themselves some gay-bashing, will take this to be an endorsement of their views and vote accordingly. Libertarian and fiscal conservatives, who *don’t* like this sort of thing, understand that the GOP will never take serious action on these issues, and that it’s safe to vote for these guys so they can get their tax breaks.
I do wonder if it’s changing, though. For obvious reasons, Mitt Romney has used his own marriage as a campaign talking point. Now, though, we have Andy McCarthy at National Review Online claiming that he’s “surprised — and offended — that Mitt claims voters are worried about a candidate who has ‘been married more than once.’”
McCarthy, you see, has been married twice (just like Ronald Reagan!) and thinks it unlikely that people will vote on such issues.
One wonders where he’s been for the last thirty years.
I wonder how long the rank-and-file will continue believing the GOP’s schtick about “family values.”
I’m not sure they believe it now, but they do still believe the last-ditch “We may be bad, but the DemonCRAPs are even worse!”, maybe because the democrats don’t beat the family values drum hard enough.
Um, I don’t mean to be offensive, but, like, all the kids I know say the vests those two are wearing in the picture are like, totally gay.
Trent Lott’s gay?
Holy shit, what’s next, Rick Santorum is fucking dogs?
I’m not sure they believe it now, but they do still believe the last-ditch “We may be bad, but the DemonCRAPs are even worse!”, maybe because the democrats don’t beat the family values drum hard enough.
I think of the Simpsons gag with the Republican motto being “We’re Just Plain Evil” while the Democrats get “We Can’t Govern” and I wonder if it was funnier in 1994 or now.
the vests those two are wearing in the picture are like, totally gay.
Bunch of flags.
I wonder if it was funnier in 1994 or now.
Definitely funnier back then. It’s still funny but in a much darker way – I think the “We can’t govern” would be half-solved if the democrats stopped believing they had to act like Republicans.
Seriously, there’s got to be some way to let some of the fart-gas out of the Beltway bubble.
Righteous Bubba: The Dems are also holding a sign that says “We Hate Life And Ourselves,” one of my favorite Simpsons bits ever.
The episode is “Bart’s Elephant”, by the way.
The rumor is always more important than the truth.
BTW, Hillary is a lesbian, I heard from certain sources…
The rumor is always more important than the truth.
BTW, Hillary is a lesbian, I heard from certain sources…
It seems to me that there’s a difference in bombshell value when the one party adopts a GAAAHHHH!!!! FAAAAAAGS!!!! policy whenever a bump in the polls is necessary.
Y’know, Trent Lott is a miserable racist opportunist scumbag, and if his replacement in the senate is the very angry rotting corpse of atilla the hun, it will be a net gain for humanity…
mikey
Trilateral–
Cf. Thomas Frank’s great litany in the introduction to What’s The Matter With Kansas?
“Their grandstanding leaders never deliver…Vote to stop abortion; receive a rollback in capital gains taxes. Vote to make our country strong again; receive deindustrialization. Vote to screw those politically correct college professors; receive electricity deregulation. Vote to get government off our backs; receive conglomeration and monopoly everywhere from media to meat-packing. Vote to stand tall against terrorists; receive Social Security privatization. Vote to strike a blow against elitism; receive a social order in which wealth is more concentrated than ever before…”
A great inconvenience to hand-type it in, but worth it.
BTW, Hillary is a lesbian, I heard from certain sources…
Well, I heard she killed Vince Foster after having an affair with him (mainly because he’s black), only married/stays with her husband for political reasons, and was the reason the guys in Metallica cut off their long hair.
Vince Foster was black? Who knew?
Vince Foster after having an affair with him (mainly because he’s black)
Black politicians have all the power. Like Sherrod Brown.
Gary Rupert… take away the “R” in his names and he is Gay U pet.
Hustler magazine’s brief statement on the matter:
From Larry Flynt’s web page.
That shot of Craig invites some photoshoperficatin’, what with the blissful straining and the hands in a classic BJ with assgrab pose. I see him pulling Denny Hastert’s quivering man hips toward his eager mouth, or something like that.
Liberals hate fags! Ya hear! I know I sometimes say that the fag agenda is a major part of the great liberal conspiracy to bring down America and force Sharona Law on us all! But that doesn’t make me inconsistent!
No, not inconsistent for a typical republican.
It makes me average.
Liberals. Hmf.
Hustler magazine’s brief statement on the matter:
Har har har.
I point you to teh Conservapedia usage statistics.
Heh. The Homophobopedia.
Come on, people! Whatever happened to innocent until proven horny?
Metallica was straight? Who knew?
My only question is, did Hitlery turn lesbo before or after she killed Vince Foster (AND Ron Brown in the airplane crash too, don’t forget)?
the great liberal conspiracy to bring down America and force Sharona Law on us all!
Is that My Sharona Law?
AND Ron Brown in the airplane crash too, don’t forget
No, that was Bill. Credit where it’s due.
AND the Archduke Franz Ferdinand.
But in answer to your question, I’ve seen solid evidence that she went lez as a result of her mind-meld with the Islamic space mummies from Planet Satanos, which was part of her erotic Stalinist programming during her sophomore year at Wellesley.
This is not to be confused with her brief, uneventful abduction by extraterrestrial cephalopods during Bill Clinton’s first term as Governor of Arkansas.
You sure?
I thought it was Juvénal Habyarimana, and Cyprien Ntaryamira.
It’s hard to keep your deadheads of state straight, I guess…
mikey
Gary Ruppert wrote:
Are you saying that gayosity is causing conservatives to pitch big tents?
unlike liberals who are biased against things they don’t like
See, conservatives are smarter than that! They’re biased against things they DO like!
kick Republican gays to the curb
“Kick XXXX to the curb” has taken the place of ‘dustbin of history’ in the Ruppert Book of Rhetoric.
But don’t we all fantasize of being kicked to the curb? Especially by Grace Jones?
And I’m sure, with a bit of effort, Huffingtonpost could have found an even less tasteful metaphor than “putting the rumor to bed”.
This is what started driving people crazy over in wingnuttia, actually, my LGBT advocacy. First they thought it was just because Pim Fortuyn was gay, and I was “Pim’s Ghost” and all, then they figured “Muslims hate gays, so we should play along” or something, then they just all in the end got baffled.
That desire to be a dirty rotten fascist does seem to start with a spasmodic voicing of the hatred of teh geeeeey. It’s like Tourrette’s Syndrome. They just blurt out things like “They recruit”, or “not around the children”. Online and off. It was quite enlightening to me regarding the wingnut mind.
Sorry, I’ll write my memoirs of wingnuttia elsewhere. Memories just always get stirred here at this site.
Thank you Larry Flint, keep up the good work.
In other news,
Jacob M:
Which imagine do you think is creepier:
1) Trent Lott vigorously schtupping a male escort with his toupe perfectly in place and never moving
or
2) Trent Lot vigorously schtupping a male escort while his toupe watches enviously from the nightstand and the metal snaps no doubt implanted in Lott’s scalp (for the affixing of the envious toupee) glinting evilly in the candlelight with each thrust?
You are a strange and dangerous man, Jacob. I pray you will use your powers only for good.
Too late.
Did anybody notice the grip Trent has on that micrphone?
Chocolate Thunder never asks questions during oral arguments.
What does it mean culturally that we now anxiously/eagerly await the latest news report from Larry Flynt?
I mean, holy fuck.
Marmoset:
Beat. Me. To. It.
So, I’ll just say, God Bless Larry Flynt.
I’m just saying, I think the title of this post might work better as “HO Lott O’ Love.”