The word I’m thinking of to describe her rhymes with shunt.

Shorter [insert credits for concept here] Ms. Priestap: I get off being spanked, therefore spousal abuse is just some silly concept made up by liberals to get trial lawyers more money.

Or, in my case, the equivalent of never having heard of water, or a board, or putting the two together.

SERE (Survival, Escape, Resistance and Evasion) is a U.S. military program that provides military personnel with training survival skills, evading capture, recovery and dealing with captivity. . . The training has been widely reported to provide a realistic simulation of harsh and abusive coercive techniques and to teach the students how to resist them.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SERE

1. Kim Priestap thinks that anyone who voluntarily undergoes a simulation of torture is an “idiot”.
2. Many of our finest soldiers voluntarily undergo a simulation of torture.
3. Kim Priestap thinks our soldiers are idiots.

My safeword from now on will be “Priestap.”

The word I’m thinking of to describe her rhymes with shunt.

I agree that she’s a runt…

–noun
3. a person who is small and contemptible

oooohhhh…. 20 seconds.

I’ll admit, my rule has always been that anything I can voluntarily withstand for twenty whole continuous seconds can’t possibly be torture.

NB: that definition does not exclude reading Priestap. Tapped out at 8 on that one.

I know a woman who enjoys consensual romantic relations with her husband. Therefore, rape by a stranger in a parking lot must not be a big deal to her!

Do we really need to explain to this guy that waterboarding isn’t torture if he kept voluntarily going back for more for the purpose of challenging himself

Wouldn’t it then follow if you don’t have the option of stopping the waterboarding, it IS torture? And by extension isn’t she then accusing US Military of committing torture IF they don’t make the option of stopping available to the waterboardee?

Why does Kim hate America?

Fantastic logic!!!
Blowing people up with explosives can’t be that bad either if there are people who voluntarily blow themselves up…

Also harmless: drugs

You know I see a huge monemaker here:

Water boarding Salons…

Safe and fun for the whole family.

Does this mean I could have stopped Pammy’s “My Sharia” video. If only I had known…

Hey, I got an idea. Why don’t we waterboard Kim Priestap until she tells us what she did with her fucking brains? That will take a hell of a lot longer than 20 seconds for her to explain, I assure you. Then we’ll see what the dumb “rhymes with shunt” has to say about the procedure.

I swear, these people are so fucking stupid, it’s frightening to contemplate. If this is the future of right-wing political discourse in this country, maybe it’s time to start thinking about leaving. Yes, it’s that scary.

Moonbat Rising’s point is perfect.

Welcome, Kim Priestap!

by this logic, Ultimate Fighting proves its ok for someone to punch her in the face. After all, some people voluntarily get into fights.

We have a voluntary army in the US. By her logic, since people voluntarily decide to go get shot at and to shoot people, then it can’t be wrong, or lead to any sort of injury whatsoever!

I also had a friend who voluntarily killed himself, so killing someone else must be fine too.

We need waterboarding, because someday there may be a Mooslem Homicide Bomber™ who has planted a bomb right in Grand Central Station– actually, fuck that– who has placed a bomb in Dolly Parton’s Dixie Stampede Dinner Attraction in Branson, Missouri– the kind of bomb with little red LED lights counting down to zero– and If we don’t waterboard him, he’ll never tell us the secret code to disarm the bomb and it’ll tick all the way down to zero and BOOOM! Then you lieberals will be sorry.

Heh. “Conservatives Who Don’t Get the Concept of Consent” number 5,634 in a sadly ongoing series.

the kind of bomb with little red LED lights counting down to zero

I can never understand why it counts down to zero. Wouldn’t it be smarter to make it count down to, oh, 3:41 or something?

The idea that people who willingly strap high explosives to their bodies would put a Timer on a bomb doesn’t really sink in with them does it?

The idiotic idea.

Teh stoopid just hurts too much anymore . . . . .

“I can never understand why it counts down to zero. Wouldn’t it be smarter to make it count down to, oh, 3:41 or something?”

LOL but how would the totally heterosexual Bruce Willis know how much time he has left?! Silly moonbat.

Is this a trick question?

Well, they seem to excuse it with the “Evil Psychopath Playing Mind Games” plotline, I think.

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By the same token, I voluntarily had my wisdom teeth removed, so it stands to reason that yanking a guy’s teeth out with pliers isn’t quote-unquote torture. Bwah-hah-hah stoopit librluz.

See, now here’s where it gets really amusing…when word that waterboarding was going on in Iraq first leaked out, the military just about fell over itself doing exactly this demonstration – having one soldier “waterboard” another to prove that it was just some good harmless fun. The wingnuts ate it up with a spoon. At the time, they thought it was a stroke of PR genius and a definitive proof that waterboarding was not torture. Funny how they seem to forget.

I was so mesmerized with Teh Stupid that I missed this gem from Clif:

“That is why reading Kim Priestap, painful though it may be, isn’t torture.

You can always stop.”

Pwned.

I guess the Abu Ghraib human pyramid wasn’t torture. It was cheerleader practice.

I guess the Abu Ghraib human pyramid wasn’t torture. It was cheerleader practice.

No, it was a fraternity prank, remember?

Alright, who brought the horsetail buttplugs? Some people use them repeatedly, thus this proves that Kim is a closeted furry who needs some plugging.

With logic like this…

This will be one dead horse that’s going to be hard to stop beating.

Forcing water into someone’s lungs is attempted murder by drowning.

Now maybe Kim wants some sociopath trying drown her as sign of love and affection but most normal people put them in prison. She’s fucked up mentalty getting off on drowning people, reviving them only to do it again and again.

How about if you substitute draft beer for the water, and add a funnel with a long hose leading to the victim’s volunteer’s mouth – is that torture?

The word “victim’s” should have been struck through. It worked in preview.

Kids, don’t try auto-erotic -waterboarding unless you’re wearing at least two wetsuits. Safety first.

Actually, beerboarding sounds pretty cool. Better than being force-fed infinite donuts, even.

Yer average bom(b)maker these days doesn’t really have the dedication to code and burn his or her own chips in order to get the bomb to go off at 3:41, or 4:20 or whatever. Unless you’re government or an artist it’s easier just to use a canned algorithm to count down to zero.

Now Ted, the Unabom(b)er, he put appropriate craftsmanship into his work. His diary depicts a continuous agony of traditional decisionmaking — bomb casing: walnut, oak or cherry? You wouldn’t see him hacking his own ROMs, that’s too new school.

I truly believe that it is this dedication to craftsmanship that will save our country as a global economic force.

What a silly bunt.

Here’s guessing that the next response will be that the waterboarded does have the option – all that’s needed is a confession.

Any guesses as to who might be dumb enough to claim that?

How about if you substitute draft beer for the water, and add a funnel with a long hose leading to the victim’s volunteer’s mouth – is that torture?

depends. Is it Lite beer?

Yer average bom(b)maker these days doesn’t really have the dedication to code and burn his or her own chips in order to get the bomb to go off at 3:41, or 4:20 or whatever. Unless you’re government or an artist it’s easier just to use a canned algorithm to count down to zero.

This problem is easily solved by using a cheap storebought digital alarm clock.

Bombs that time down to zero are like the computers on the TeeVee and in the movies where they all have courier text that scrolls on black screens and their keyboards all go clackety-clackety-clackety and there are no mouses (mice?)

What a silly bunt.

Nope. We don’t bunt in this league. A walk, a bloop and a blast. Just ask Joe Torre…

mikey

there are no mouses (mice?)

“Meeses.”

“Oy the stupidity! The stupidity!”

The word I’m thinking of to describe her rhymes with shunt.

A cupid stunt?

Bombs that time down to zero are like the computers on the TeeVee and in the movies where they all have courier text that scrolls on black screens and their keyboards all go clackety-clackety-clackety and there are no mouses (mice?)

Ooh, don’t forget the monitors that magically project sharply focused text images onto users’ faces when used in dark rooms.

Zooming out from the obvious (to everyone but the Wingnuts) difference between doing something voluntarily with someone you can be reasonably sure isn’t trying to kill you vs. the same behavior forced upon you by people who call you an enemy and are holding you prisoner, I just still cannot get my mind around the fact that there are people in this country who are gleefully advocating torture then, often in the same breath, nattering on about their supposedly superior morality. My snark-fu is just too weak. I can only stare in silent horror.

This problem is easily solved by using a cheap storebought digital alarm clock.

Just what I was thinking – I doubt bombers would homebrew complicated circuitry because that limits the FBI’s or whoever’s suspect pool to people who know how to homebrew complicated circuitry.

But if the movies make people think that they have to build custom circuits that blink and beep as they count down, it might make fewer people build bombs because it looks too hard. Bravo, Hollywood, keeping us safer.

…then again, if everybody thinks that homebrew circuitry is needed for bombs, you start getting idiocy like this.

“…computers on the TeeVee”

Don’t forget those big reels of tape rotating jerkily.

The word I’m thinking of to describe her rhymes with shunt.

Oh yeah! Allan Funt was also pro-torture, wasn’t he.

…then again, if everybody thinks that homebrew circuitry is needed for bombs, you start getting idiocy like this.

Damn, that sucks. I feel for that Star girl. And I wonder if some of the crazy over-reaction of the guards was because she’s kinda brown looking.

I want to know more about that story.

But if the movies make people think that they have to build custom circuits that blink and beep as they count down, it might make fewer people build bombs because it looks too hard. Bravo, Hollywood, keeping us safer.

BBZZZZTTT.

Interesting theory. But people who like to build bombs are really more interested in the BOOM than the nifty tech. Fuses and Chem detonators are way more likely to be used. People who feel they need to use elaborate electronic timers and tamper-resists are more likely not really “people who build bombs” but rather “people who belong to or are trained by intelligence services who kill people and just happen to be using a bomb”.

Or John Birges.

Um, or so I’ve heard…

mikey

She came from Greece she had a thirst for knowledge, she studied
sculpture at Saint Martin’s College, that’s where I caught her eye. She
told me that her Dad was loaded, I said in that case I’ll have a rum and
coke-cola. She said fine and in thirty seconds time she said, I want to
live like common people, I want to do whatever common people do, I
want to sleep with common people, I want to sleep with common people
like you. Well what else could I do – I said I’ll see what I can do. I took
her to a supermarket, I don’t know why but I had to start it somewhere,
so it started there. I said pretend you’ve got no money, she just laughed
and said oh you’re so funny. I said yeah? Well I can’t see anyone else
smiling in here. Are you sure you want to live like common people, you
want to see whatever common people see, you want to sleep with
common people, you want to sleep with common people like me. But
she didn’t understand, she just smiled and held my hand. Rent a flat
above a shop, cut your hair and get a job. Smoke some fags and play
some pool, pretend you never went to school. But still you’ll never get it
right ‘cos when you’re laid in bed at night watching roaches climb the
wall if you call your Dad he could stop it all. You’ll never live like
common people, you’ll never do what common people do, you’ll never
fail like common people, you’ll never watch your life slide out of view,
and dance and drink and screw because there’s nothing else to do. Sing
along with the common people, sing along and it might just get you
thru’, laugh along with the common people, laugh along even though
they’re laughing at you and the stupid things that you do. Because you
think that poor is cool. I want to live with common people, I want to live
with common people etc……

kim darling. listen, learn, understand.

this is another in a continuing series of “the world explained by great lyrics.”

Interesting theory. But people who like to build bombs are really more interested in the BOOM than the nifty tech….

Um, I think I forgot to put in a </snark> tag…

And don’t forget the Magical Rock-Steady Crosshairs from any scoped rifle you’d care to name. We don’t need no steeking barrel rest!

This reminds me of the right-winger logic that water-boarding can’t be torture because it’s involved in SERE training, which teaches military personnel to withstand torture.

Priestap = Past ripe

“Wizbang”? If that isn’t pro-terrorist I don’t know what is.

Kim Priestap =

I, pimp tasker

Tim parks pie

Pea pit smirk

Oh yeah! Allan Funt was also pro-torture, wasn’t he

couldn’t say. the only association he pulls up is a freshly shaved leg. weird.

Priestap, oh, pries, priestap. ugh. lasted only three seconds…

If I challenge myself by holding my breath for two minutes, that’s exactly the same as if someone holds my head under water for an indeterminate amount of time.

“Does this mean I could have stopped Pammy’s “My Sharia” video.”

Yes. The safeword, in case it happens again, is “Bolton”

[…] Sadly, No!, I need to add that kind of waterboarding I’m suggesting doesn’t involve a safe word.   […]

Some women enjoy having sex with more than one man at a time.

Therefore, wouldn’t really be so bad for Kim Priestap if she were gang-banged by an entire Hell’s Angels chapter.

OK, folks, let’s all remember that when we attack wingnuts it should be because of their stupidity, not their gender. Let’s not use derogatory gender-based words such as the c-word, either directly or by using the, er, “witch” or other rhyming ploy. Nor should we suggest, even by a fanciful analogy, that the subject of a post might be subjected to sexual violence. Otherwise we give ammunition to the real misogynists to accuse us of misogyny.

“You can always stop.”

Or, you can never start.

Even better. 😀

Reading that site made me sick. It is sad to see such deluded individuals.

[…] one of the classified techniques of waterboarding might be to give the person being waterboarded a secret signal that he can give to make the waterboarding […]

[…] “Waterboarding Is Fun!” Priestap brings us the Kenyan slum defense: [Obama is] insinuating that owning a number of houses – […]

You all had so much fun with this.

But.

Let’s say they gave you your choice. You could be waterboarded or have an eye cut out. Which would you choose?

Okay. Let’s try another.

How about waterboarded or drawn-and-quartered?

Or you could be waterboarded or have red hot poker stuck where the sun don’t shine?

Or waterboarded or have fingers crushed one at a time?

I know there was a wascally conservative to mock, but come on. Most people will put waterboarding into a different category than most of the things we traditionally consider as torture. Certainly it is excruciatingly unpleasant, particularly when carried out by people that are not your friends, but it is still not qualitatively the same as having an eye removed, or fingers crushed.

No one will volunteer to try out having an eye cut out to see if they can stand it.

And I’m sorry, but if you were actually given the choice, any one of you would prefer Khalid Sheikh Mohammend’s stay with us to John McCain’s visit with the North Vietnamese.

For that matter, as truly horrific as it must have been to have been humiliated at Abu Ghraib, if I had my choice, I’m pretty sure I’d have opted for that treatment instead of being held in one of Saddam’s prisons where they did things like hooking up car batteries to people’s genitals, and large numbers of people simply didn’t make it.

But you guys all know this.

fustian said,

Moral midgetry at work.

McGravitas:

Nice ad hominem.

Did it in just four words. Very compact.