Die Julia Die!
And suddenly, it struck her, she not only possessed the dreaded Vagina, slayer of many a conservative, but she was also less than 100% white. The revelation was too great for her fragile mind to take and what remained of her sanity fled into the Mountains, never to be seen again.
Michelle Malkin, Inhuman Events:
Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be ‘Julia’
If we had to choose just one thing that defined right-wingers, it would have to be dumbassery, projection, secret goat fetishes inability to handle complexity. Or to be more specific, inability to handle the existence of options.
If someone tries to expand options or worse yet, acknowledge the infinite spectrum of human experience and try to cater to it, it becomes something wingnuts physically can’t handle or process in any way.
For in their mind, there is one unt only one way everyone is supposed to be. If that one way doesn’t fit your existence, you live the rest of your life in misery and pain and like it!
So if there’s any other option, any other door open, it can’t just be something that they continue waltz past obliviously. It instead becomes a threat. This new possibility is a wholesale elimination of the old possibility. Sowing the fields of the one option with salt so none may go wingnuttily into that good night.
Sure, it may seem like they can still do the same thing they always did. But as they force themselves into that old steel mold, they notice how the edges pinch and tear and how poor of a fit it was for them for all those years. And really isn’t that the same thing as complete destruction?
Damnit, they bled and suffered for those sunk costs and no liberal’s going to come around and make life better for some slackers who didn’t even earn it through tears, sweat, piss, and blood!
Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):
- Allowing women to have options other than serving as uneducated broodmares for our Financial Overlords is the real jackboot on their uteruses!
But let’s let our esteemed capo and Human Bile Factory explain her case.
Quick, hide under the covers.
Wow.
You know, it really would save more time if all wingnut screeds were just this line. It’s pretty much their sole point most of the time. But I suppose that would ill serve the snark industry as we devolved to just photoshopping pictures of butts and scrawling “LOL UR dum”.
The nation’s storyteller, Barack Obama, unveiled a frightening new fable on the Internet intended to scare women away from supporting fiscal conservatives in November.
Oh yes, women needed a reason to be scared away from conservatism this year. Why if Obama hadn’t posted a standard “my policies do X, my opponent’s policies would not” women wouldn’t have at all noticed the conservatives ranting about how sluts who take birth control should be raped to death, that OB/GYN care should come with mandatory rape, or otherwise devolving into CHUDs whenever the topic of Vagina-Americans comes up.
I guess that’s going to be the theme of 2012, finding ever more byzantine ways to explain how one single meaningless event or person is personally responsible for how the conservatives have managed to wear down their dog whistles and euphemisms so much, not even the fabled “low-information voter” is falling for it anymore.
Which means at least a 300% increase in the number of wingnuts writing their screeds while weeping their eyes out on how they’ve hitched their trailer to the plummeting comet of modern conservatism.
But as is increasingly common with Obama’s social media propaganda initiatives, “The Life of Julia” immediately flopped.
Wow, a throwaway message about policies flopped? Since the average standard of a web campaign ad is that its immediately skipped over, this must have like set people on fire or something. Is one of the slides about going back to the kitchen and making him a sandwich? Did he reveal the secret location of the “Whitey tape” and who he paid to kill Breitbart?
Don’t just leave me in suspense, Michelle!
Why?
Oh fuck you!
Sigh, guess I’ll just have to google this life-ending-
…
It’s just a bunch of wingnuts ranting and raving about it as if the very mention of a woman as a human being was actually physically destroying their soul.
I’m not kidding.
Hey, dipshits, if you want to pretend that your opponent’s campaign ad is meaningless and doesn’t leave an impact, the first thing you need to do is stop screaming on the ground as if it was Kryptonite.
Might take away from your desperate hand-waving. Just a little.
Because 1) self-sufficient women voters aren’t as sheeple-ish as Democratic strategists make them out to be, 2) conservative activists are overtaking Obama’s zombie army online, 3) non-delusional Americans don’t want cradle-to-grave utopians turning their country into the next Greece or Spain, and 4) responsible grownups are getting sick and tired of radical Saul Alinsky-style tall tales from the progressive Pied Piper.
Who can take a shit pile
Sprinkle it with lard
Cover it in a shiny wrapper and a piece of chard?
Oh, the dog whistle girl can!
And also, Greece and Spain. Those would be two countries currently being plummeted into the ground by those austerity measures, right? You know, the ones you’ve been trying to get to work here for 30 years and which have only caused our economy to lag so far behind, Slovakia is in danger of kicking our ass?
Using snazzy graphics and interactive slideshow features,
Holy, shitballs! He’s got the power of Flash! No one will be able to stop his mad reign now!
And apropos of nothing, but don’t you make your living on the web? Glad you don’t need to… you know… know anything about how it works to collect wingnut welfare.
BarackObama.com spins a glowing narrative of imaginary Julia’s life from age 3 to 67. But “Julia” is a pathetic figment of the progressive imagination.
Yes.
Yes, she isn’t real. She’s a metaphor for real women, you know, a literary device. Your teacher tried to educate you about them before you threw a brick at her head and called her a Commie Liberal Elitist? No? Nothing?
Do… do you often have difficulty telling real people from fake people?!?
Oh, really? How long?
Suddenly your entire career makes perfect sense.
She simply cannot function without the lifelong intervention of federal patriarchs.
You’re the Patriarchs! You! Even though we think the patriarchy is a good idea and women shouldn’t be allowed outside of the house without an owner… I mean protector! You’re the sexists! C’mon baby, we won’t hit you again, come back to the Republican Party, that guy’s a total loser… and did you notice he’s black?
And no one mention that when you expend five seconds of effort to google search and flip through the five second program yourself, it turns out that this patriarchal tool is a web-developer entrepreneur who’s only connection with Big Brother’s Death Orb is receiving substandard safety nets and a barely functional society when she needs them.
On that note, isn’t it sad that the Anti-government anarchists in charge of the Right have devolved the debate so far that we’re literally having a debate on whether or not we want our seniors to suffer and die the second they retire and whether or not having schools or a health care system are good things or not?
I don’t think the Right wants to win much more, less they find out exactly why most countries try and make sure the poor have something to lose if they decide to rise up and slaughter the rich for food.
Instead of two parents preparing her for school, Obama credits Head Start bureaucrats with ensuring that Julia is “ready to learn and succeed” in kindergarten.
Yup, Obama will personally put a bullet in the heads of every single parent, stealing their children to work in the Head Start Slave Factory creating TPS reports for our bureaucratic overlords.
Also, in addition to the lesson on metaphors that you missed, it appears you also missed the lesson on homonyms. Different other preparing there. More about preschooling to succeed at Kindergarten rather than making sure a suited gentleman with an ear-piece is there to force your kid on the prison bus to Guantanamo.
Instead of individual teachers, private mentors, home-school organizers or charter school leaders, Obama extols his federal Race to the Top program for implementing the high school “classes she needs to do well” in college.
Absolutely true. Obama’s Race to the Top program is very specific. By killing all teachers, private tutors, and private school attendees, Obama ensures that his Future Stormtroopers are hand selected from only the most “inner city” of schools. You know, where the kids with melanin are… cause they’re black… did… did we kill this dog whistle already?
And good job failing to hide that your real issue with Obama’s plan is that it might help start to offset the horrible skewed imbalance. The one you’ve set up so that only those who pay for it can get a quality education (thus lowering competition for some actually qualified poor kid to grab the job intended to a rich fuck-up).
Instead of thrift-minded families who save for their own kids’ higher educations (or who opt for non-college alternatives) and who encourage those kids to work in private-sector summer jobs, Obama praises his “opportunity tax credit” and Pell Grants for putting Julia through college.
Again, with Obama’s murderous elimination of parents and families. Jesus, Obama, just because you didn’t have a traditional family doesn’t mean you need to take it out on everybody else!
Now, if I was some idiot liberal who wasn’t hip to how the existence of a helping hand shoots those who can do without it in the face, I might note that thanks to the continuous underfunding of colleges by Republicans, there hasn’t been a student in a long damn time able to pay off a decent 4-year University just off summer jobs.
I might even note that limiting college advancement (which just so happens to now be a mandatory requirement for even entry level jobs) to those whose families have a couple of hundred thousand just lying around might just very well put a lie to the whole “meritocracy” shit.
But luckily, I’m not, so this makes perfect sense to me.
Instead of acknowledging how costly Obamacare mandates have caused individual-market health care insurers to drop plans altogether, Obama promotes the government-manufactured umbilical cord tethering “children” like Julia to their parents’ health care plans until age 26.
Yeah! How dare Obama allow people to remain on their parent’s health insurance unless they have their own insurance (by being lucky enough to have a job that actually includes it (rarer than unicorns into bisexual horn play, believe you me))!
That’s like Triple Hitler, with Stalin on the top!
Also, private insurers dropping their clients for arbitrary reasons that place their profit margins over what is best for the customers who have bought their services already?!?
Why, if there wasn’t a better argument for the continued lack of genuine public health care for all people, I’ve never heard one!
Instead of accepting that the costs and consequences of a woman’s sexual choices should be a matter of personal responsibility, Big Daddy Obama heralds his religious liberty-crushing birth control/abortion mandate for allowing Julia to “focus on her work instead of worrying about her health.”
Instead of arguing that a woman should keep the aspirin between the knees or learn to like the taste of cunt, Obama in his paternalist patriarchal sexism thinks that women are actual people whose health care shouldn’t be held hostage to whether a bunch of panty-sniffers think she’s a slut.
Cause not letting us own our employees by demanding that everyone let us dictate their lives based on our personal religious post-hoc justifications for raw hatred of Vagina-Americans is exactly the same as genuine oppression.
Because really, is their any form of oppression and robbing of liberty greater than preventing powerful white men from dominating other people to make their dicks feel harder? Truly women couldn’t possibly begin to understand their pain.
Despite the fact that most private health care plans already covered maternal screenings, prenatal care and related screenings before Obamacare passed, the president attributes Julia’s pregnancy well-being to the law.
Well, yes, at private prices. Expensive private prices. In fact, that particular gulf is exactly why we have a first-world infant and maternal mortality rate for white women and a third-world infant and maternal mortality rate for black women.
Though she makes a good point here. We asked before if there was a worse oppression than not letting someone oppress someone else. And here we see the one thing that’s worse. Not forcing poor mothers to die so that rich mothers can feel more special about their routine preventative care.
I mean, why would you even bother having a baby if you aren’t able to enjoy a young poor mother dying on the operating table from preventable pregnancy complications?
Is there no sacred act of parenthood that Obama won’t try and destroy?
And it’s not local sovereignty or financial discipline that results in better schools for Julia’s new son, “Zachary.” Nope. It’s Obama’s “investments” in education and “programs like Race to the Top.” (Is there nothing Race to the Top can’t do?)
Um, how is “financial discipline” supposed to lead to better schools? By turning all the teachers to dominatrices with an accountant fetish?
Have you finally run out of ways to try to argue that eliminating public education will improve it?
“Under President Obama,” the campaign web feature then crows, “Julia starts her own web business. She qualifies for a Small Business Administration loan, giving her the money she needs to invest in her business. President Obama’s tax cuts for small businesses like Julia’s help her to get started. She’s able to hire employees, creating new jobs in her town and helping to grow the local economy.”
In the real world, according to Dun and Bradstreet, the SBA supported fewer than 62,000 small business loans: a measly 0.2 percent of the nation’s 27.5 million small businesses. The vast majority of entrepreneurs get their start without the SBA’s “help” and want only one thing: for Obama and his wealth-confiscators to leave them the heck alone.
Yup, small businesses just want Obama to stop calling them at three in the morning with his “brilliant” ideas on improving their profit margin. They heard them the first time, Obama! And they told him the first time that genetically-engineered wombats just isn’t in the budget! When will that guy take a fucking hint?
On a more serious note, this is why you don’t compromise with these animals Obama. Because they will reduce your programs to near uselessness and then use their own “victories” to argue that you did nothing.
But hey, it’s a small issue, and besides, the real issue is obviously just stopping those late night phone calls. Small businesses certainly don’t need a robust safety net to take care of entrepreneurs in the very likely scenario of their business failing. Nah, just leave them alone and they’ll thrive, like they are in laissez faire Denmark… wait.
As soon as Obama publicized “The Life of Julia” on the web,
Aw, not even going to try and tackle the medicare issue? C’mon, you’ve already jumped full in on the contraception crazy train that’s seeing women flee your party in droves! Don’t you want to join your friends on the Ban Medicare float to see if you can get rid of your elderly voters as well?
conservative activists swarmed Twitter to provide real-world counter-narratives.
The wingnuts apparently have got their marching orders to make a lot of noise hoping that might distract people from the fact that Obama ate their lunch on both the women’s rights issues and the “government matters” issues at the same time.
“I’m no Julia,” one wrote. “As a small-business owner I’m being taxed to death. I need the (government) to get out of my way and let me make money.” Another young conservative female tweeted: “As a woman business owner I’m offended that POTUS thinks I need him to survive and thrive.” Conservative writer Kemberlee Kaye added: “What the Julia example really shows is the Democrat ideal. Complete and total reliance on the government.”
But hey, at least they managed to swarm twitter to demonstrate how thoroughly they could miss the point.
Also love the middle response which is more revilement at the idea that Obama’s blackity black blackness might dare touch them in some small way and thus taint their pure Aryan soul.
Yeah, the next couple of decades of demographic movement is not gonna be kind to you, is it?
My story? I’ve founded three web ventures over the past eight years without a penny of taxpayer money or government venture socialism.
Three web ventures huh? Yes, luckily your web ventures relied on absolutely nothing built by taxpayer money or government programs designed on providing something for everyone at their own expense.
Well, maybe I shouldn’t snark. Maybe she single-handedly created DARPA-net and expanded it into a free world-wide service open to anyone and protected from predatory private firms that want to control it.
You know, I want a magic button that deprives people who say they are self-made and didn’t rely on no government, etc etc, of all government created services, programs, technologies, and accomplishments they regularly rely on without notice. Let them live their John Galt fantasy for just a day without all the infrastructure they take for granted and want to get out of maintaining.
I’m not thinking it would be illuminating for the wingnuts. Obviously they are immune to basic reality by this point, but it would be worth it to see their smug entitled asses have to intellectually grapple with what being legitimately self-sustaining means.
And hey, if I’m really lucky, the shock of doing actual work for the first time in their life will kill them.
We free-market-centered small-business women can “grow the local economy” and raise our children and improve our schools just fine without the meddling, patriarchal hand of President Obama taking credit for our every last success.
Well, great, then you don’t personally need those resources you over-entitled wingnut welfare receiving hypocrite.
Doesn’t mean that everyone else needs to go without it. I don’t personally need the electricity infrastructure that goes to your house or the garbage men that come by your house to collect the various dead bodies of the families you eviscerate and eat, but it doesn’t mean that such services are unneeded.
Newsflash, the world doesn’t revolve around you, where everybody only needs what you personally need only when you need it. Fuck, I’ve met 15 year olds who’ve read Ayn Rand for the first time that have more empathy and self-awareness than you.
After hyperventilating for months about the Republican “war on women,”
Yes, the one that’s still going on and which the Right has decided to continue with the screeching Pavlovian response to “The Life of Julia”? The one showing that as long as the subject can be presumed to have a cunt, Republicans will stop at nothing to destroy it?
You had a response to that at any point other than “I’m hoping to get a position as an Aunt in the Republic of Gilead”?
Democratic new-media gurus inadvertently have exposed the real Barack Obama: a chauvinistic control freak who would tether every last woman and child to his ever-expanding, budget-busting Nanny State.
Yes, we have our knockdown punch that will IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION our sexism all over Obama’s face!
All we need to do is point out that by giving women other options besides “get born rich or die”, he’s really demanding to control everyone’s lives by eliminating the painful uncomfortable options that are still available for the masochistically inclined! It’s foolproof!
I mean, what are women going to do? See through our transparent bullshit? Pah! I’d like to see them try! Seriously, how do they manage to do anything with those tiny lady brains?
Right? Right? … Please say I’m an honorary man now… I … I don’t want to go back in the cage.
Mamas, for the sake of your family’s freedom and our republic’s survival, don’t let your babies grow up to be “Julia.”
So, basically, be scared, dog whistles, IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION, and a complete failure to understand how options work. Oh, and let’s not forget the Social Darwinism that argues if you don’t have hundreds of thousands of dollars lying in your mattress, you might as well give up now, you sow.
Still…
A bit light for Malkin. I didn’t see one rant about countertops or even a good bat beheading with her teeth.
I guess, it’s hard to have your heart in something when its obviously a mandate from above to try and do something, anything to try and prevent the complete demographic fail that 4 years of letting your party’s id fly free has wrought.
Turns out all dem minorities add up to a pretty substantial majority when you add them all up. You could suck it up, try and repair bridges and actually grow as people.
Ha! Yeah, no, throwing any shit you can against the wall and seeing what sticks to try to drown out the other side really is your only option these days.
Don’t worry, we’ll cheer you on as you slip beneath the waves of your increasing irrelevance.
Frisked!
teachers to dominatrices with an accountant fetish
I am intrigued by your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
A blast from the past about when ole Michelle got pwned.
We free-market-centered small-business women of Orient are …
I doubt many women were as scared by Obama’s talk as they were by, ohhhhhh, the actual War On Women the GOP has engaged in
Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t our tax structure the same as it was under that “CEO President” we had a few years ago?
Aside from the constant wailing and gnashing of teeth on the right, I don’t think Obama’s actually raised anybody’s taxes since he’s been in office.
I’m gonna buy a featureless mask for Mrs__B for some Julia display. I’ll be wearing a tee shirt that says “PATRIARCHY”
I don’t think Obama’s actually raised anybody’s taxes since he’s been in office.
Smokers.
.
Smokers.
I thought cigarette taxes were at the state level?
I thought cigarette taxes were at the state level?
I’m sure it is in many non-tobacco-growing states, but there’s also a federal tax, and Obama signed this last increase into law.
I happen to agree with this one, though.
.
The main reason Michele My warning Belle is upset is that she can’t figure out what kind of counter tops a metaphor has.
For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.
And you can count on a wingnut to come up with it.
… and I mean on principle, I hate regressive taxes. But I’ll make an exception for tobacco products.
.
It’s strange to see the phrase “Die, Julia, Die!” referring to someone other than Julia Gillard.
No one hates with the furious intensity that Malkin hates.
I feel sorry for her kids — I’ve always suspected that she inflicts some serious emotional abuse on them when she can’t find someone else to scream at. After all, those kids are clearly not all white…
Three web ventures huh? Yes, luckily your web ventures relied on absolutely nothing built by taxpayer money or government programs designed on providing something for everyone at their own expense.
Well, maybe I shouldn’t snark. Maybe she single-handedly created DARPA-net and expanded it into a free world-wide service open to anyone and protected from predatory private firms that want to control it.
You know, I want a magic button that deprives people who say they are self-made and didn’t rely on no government, etc etc, of all government created services, programs, technologies, and accomplishments they regularly rely on without notice. Let them live their John Galt fantasy for just a day without all the infrastructure they take for granted and want to get out of maintaining.
I’m not thinking it would be illuminating for the wingnuts. Obviously they are immune to basic reality by this point, but it would be worth it to see their smug entitled asses have to intellectually grapple with what being legitimately self-sustaining means.
Quoted for truth.
Addendum –
Three web ventures huh? Yes, luckily your web ventures relied on absolutely nothing built by taxpayer money or government programs designed on providing something for everyone at their own expense.
A close second would be people who diss public transportation (it’s socialism, MAAAAANN!) while holding up their car as their own personal symbol of Freedom, Capitalism and America. Yeah, because all those roads you’re driving on? Free Market Jesus just sort of conjured them into existence with a snap of his fingers so you could live the Ayn Rand dream. It certainly didn’t require any federal government intervention, or any of that tax money they so oppressively took from you.
During the last campaign, John McCain wouldn’t allow Malkin in on even telephone press conferences because she was too extreme. And now she’s considered “moderate.”
Last time I saw a mouth like that it had a hook in it…
Camping near the socialist commie dam Roosevelt built. Pic was taken with an iPhone.
It’s Motherfuckin’ Malkin’s Day! Comes right after Mother’s Day! There has got to be some sort of P-shop embellishment for the vicious Anchor Baby. Those teeth are just perfect for a set of vampiric fangs. And red eyeballs. And pointy earlobes. And little devil-horns, right at the hairline, by the temples. C’mon, I thought we had a Photoshop wizard up in here!
Beautiful photo, tsam!
Wait!
The SBA was started by Republican President Eisenhower.
Why, oh why does Michelle Malkin hate Republican Business programs?
If all the Republicans who are currently in the government would just quit then that would immediately cut the size of the government by approximately one half. I, for one, am all for this solution to “big government”.
Of course Malkin is considered moderate. Republicans welcome right-wingers into their ranks. Democrats purge left-wingers from theirs. Somehow the acceptable mainstream dialogue keeps shifting rightward. I wonder why this is.
I wonder why this is.
It’s easy: The LIBERAL media is turning us all into commiezombies. There is a small but growing number or Real American Patriots who are fighting to save us all.
Beautiful photo, tsam!
Thanks, vacuumKongDongSlayer.
I just hope that the Obama admin and his campaign people are not scared away by all the right wing noise about “Julia”. Hint: the reason why the right wing is up in arms about this is because it is effective! Indeed, the right wing knows this strategy well — they used their version of Julia (and Julius) to kill “Hillarycare”.
FWIW, I think Obama should have promoted health care reform in a similar way: instead of just saying what health care reform is supposed to accomplish in rather generic and unbelievable terms (in such a way that it seems the health care reform plan boils down to i. steal underwear, ii. …, iii. save money and provide better health care), they could have actually said concretely how health care reform would impact various people.
Republicans welcome right-wingers into their ranks. Democrats purge left-wingers from theirs – Tom Allen
As Willy “gives me the willies” Kristol pointed out, conservatives are far more tolerant than “liberals”.
Holy shit–one of them broke the code!
Cheese it–it’s the cops!
Holy shit–one of them broke the code!
They’re on to us! Quickly comrades! Back to Moscow!
Chris-
Yeah, it seems to be human nature to assume that whatever infrastructure was in place when you were born or were a young child is simply “how the world works” and a “natural aspect” of just how things are.
It takes effort and education to remember that food doesn’t magically appear in the supermarkets and the roads weren’t built and maintained by road fairies and that all of our modern life depends on thousands of dreadfully important subsystems running in unison and maintained by often underpaid professionals.
Most of us manage this very well and remember that paying to maintain these systems and planning future improvements is an important part of continuing modern existence.
Those who don’t become wingnuts and libertarians and publish giant screeds about how their online shipping company of military parts don’t rely on no gubmint, dagnabbit!
I suppose the silver lining is that with the success they are having with their anti-government anarcho-capitalist uprising, they will eventually have to know what it’s like to have nothing to rely on but themselves.
Unfortunately it seems they’ve already figured out their plan in that case (buying off police and private security to keep the riff-raff from storming their gates and running their companies remotely from Europe or some other country they haven’t destroyed yet).
all of our modern life depends on thousands of dreadfully important subsystems running in unison and maintained by often underpaid professionals
Stop inspecting those backflow preventers for a while and see what happens. We’d probably all be (literally) up to our necks in it.
Anyone else get some bicycling in over the weekend? I got in 88 miles yesterday at about 10mph. Which seems mighty slow until you realize that there was also about 8000 or 9000 feet of climbing in there too. Once you know that, it just seems really slow. But I didn’t bonk, and I might have had another 10 miles in the tank, but it was getting late, and had shit to do.
Silly Major, plumbing doesn’t need to be maintained. After all, aren’t all of Rome’s water needs met by aqueducts that are around 2000 years old?
And this woman went to Oberlin College, perhaps the single most progressive institution of higher education in the United States….
I’ll bet she consisted of one-third of the Oberlin Young Republicans when she studied there. What a sad excuse for a journalist.
Aside from the constant wailing and gnashing of teeth on the right, I don’t think Obama’s actually raised anybody’s taxes since he’s been in office.
Indeed. He lowered taxes on the working classes albeit temporarily by cutting the Social Security withholding, but apart from that, there’s been a net cut in taxes across the board if anything, and most likely neutral tax changes.
Anyone else get some bicycling in over the weekend? I got in 88 miles yesterday at about 10mph.
Nice. I could only squeeze in an hour or so, so I went for twenty and hit nineteen.
A shithouse rat would be bowled over by how fucking crazy this lunatic loon Malkin is. She doesn’t even know what she’s angry at any more except that she hates everything she’s not, which is anything sane, rational, compassionate, logical, doubtful, apologetic, magnanimous, generous, caring, selfless, considerate, sympathetic, and empathetic.
There really isn’t a pejorative in existence in any language that truly expresses how abjectly vile and malevolent Malkin is at the very core of her boiling poop pit of a conscience.
Anyone else get some bicycling in over the weekend? I got in 88 miles yesterday at about 10mph.
I managed to roll my bike about three feet across the garage so I could get the lawn mower out from behind it. Shortly after the lawn mowing heavy t-storms moved in and curtailed any designs on bike riding. No complaints though, we desperately need the moisture right now.
Anyone else get some bicycling in over the weekend? I got in 88 miles yesterday at about 10mph.
I did about an hour’s worth. I had signed up to do a century ride and just didn’t feel like I’d trained adequately for it.
Nice post, but I think photoshopping a Deep Sea Anglerfish onto her portrait might have been a bit much.
Hey now, lets not be looksist. I don’t think she looks anything like an anglerfish, and don’t think you really do either. We don’t know that Michelle Malkin is a terrible human being. Maybe she has found the best way to support her family is to go on TV and radio and write terrible hateful racist and sexist things. Maybe in private she’s a good wife and mother, and volunteers a VA hospital and donates a large portion of her earnings to Doctors without Borders and the Sierra Club. Just because every bit of evidence we have seems to indicate that she is a hate-deranged harpy, is no reason to assume she is one.
That’s kind of an insult to Deep Sea Anglerfish isn’t it?
Compare and contrast.
One’s a vicious predator with no trace of empathy or humanity and one’s just a fish.
The nation’s storyteller, Barack Obama, unveiled a frightening new fable on the Internet intended to scare women away from supporting fiscal conservatives in November.
Now this one really had me cracking up. I mean the last of the true “fiscal conservatives” died out long before I was born. If in fact they ever existed at all. Oh sure, they like to claim they are fiscal conservatives when they are on the
Appalachiancampaign trail, but if they ever get in power then it’s suddenly all “deficits don’t matter”.Fiscal Conservative ISNOTREAL!!!
Who’s ready for some mango dessert?
Dave D
Spot on! Don’t let your daughters become college snobs who are sluts and prostitutes having sex every hour on the hour and eating birth control pills like candy all on the taxpayer dollar.
Seems Dave D. didn’t go to college and resents people who know how birth control works (or have sex, for that matter).
~
I completely agree with Dave D. Don’t send your daughters to college to do all that nasty stuff, send them to my house to do all that nasty stuff instead.
Compare and contrast.
The resemblence is indeed remarkable.
Helmut, sounds like a lovely ride.
.
Of course at my age the downside is if I had a bunch of young college girls at my house that I had to have sex with every hour on the hour my heart would probably give out. The upside is that that’s probably still a better retirement plan the the one I currently have.
Shortly after the lawn mowing heavy t-storms moved in and curtailed any designs on bike riding
That’s what they ALL say!
Compare and contrast.
….
One’s a vicious predator with no trace of empathy or humanity and one’s just a fish.
The behavior of the males is similar.
Saw the post title, assumed it was about Julia Gorin.
AND IT IS NOT.
In re Thread Bear @ 19:42 S,N! Standard Time: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0584431/quotes?qt=qt0461854
Derbyshire resurfaces
Shorter: I’m a white supremacist because whites are supreme. Nuthin wrong with that.
NO SHIT–HE REALLY SAYS THAT.
Anyone else get some bicycling in over the weekend?
Izzat what the kids are calling “it” these days?
The SBA was started by Republican President Eisenhower.
Why, oh why does Michelle Malkin hate Republican Business programs?
He also warned us about the Military Industrial Complex. So, LIBERAL!
I started a succesful long-haul trucking company withgout A SINGLE CENT OF TAXPAYER MONEY!
I started a succesful paving business without A SINGLE CENT OF TAXPAYER MONEY!
I started a transcontinental railroad WITHOUT ANY GOVERNMENT ASSISTANCE AT ALL!
I started a defense contracting business WITHOUT ANY GOVERNMENT ASSISTANCE AT ALL!
To a Malkin-reader, the world is a terrifying place full of demons threatening the holy and pure traditions of “fuck you I got mine”, isn’t it?
That woman is going to OD on hate.
Why do I read The Derp? It makes me…not happy.
I go fishing on Lake Roosevelt, which is a slackwater reservoir behind the Grand Coulee Dam WITHOUT ANY GOVERNMENT ASSISTANCE AT ALL!
Gee, a bunch of conservative activists disagreed with Barack Obama? That’ll show him.
Also.
I’m a small business owner and I’m not being taxed to death.
Just once I’d like to hear an actual small business owner say that, instead of the greasy, twitchy fuckup who sands and masks the cars before somebody paints them.
HOWEVER: I would like to point out that our largest expense is providing health insurance WITHOUT ANY GOVERNMENT ASSISTANCE AT ALL, and that IS killing us.
If we had to choose just one thing that defined right-wingers, it would have to be
dumbassery, projection, secret goat fetishesinability to handle complexity. Or to be more specific, inability to handle the existence of options.Yet, in a further example of con cog diss, they seem to believe that everyone has the same options: That minimum-wage retail employee is on Food Stamps & Medicaid because when her guidance counselor told her she could be a wage-slave or go to Harvard & coast through life from there, she made the wrong choice!!
she made the wrong choice!!
No doubt. That’s why I chose to be white and reasonably intelligent.
I go fishing
Yeah, & YOU HAVE TO BUY A LICENSE, DON’T YOU??
So Derb wound up at VDARE. What a surprise.
Yeah, & YOU HAVE TO BUY A LICENSE, DON’T YOU??
I DO. We also pay a lot of money to maintain that monstrosity of a dam and the Reclamation Bureau to take care of the ever-eroding shores and put boat launches with bathrooms every 20 miles.
Hey, what the fuck? Comment posting works “normally” now.
I know–I LOVE it
Bathrooms? More gov’t. waste!
What’s the phony lake for, huh?
Everyone wear blue and green this evening in support of my hometown Florida Everblades who are playing game one in the best of seven Kelly Cup championship series tonight against the Las Vegas Wranglers. Go Blades!!!
Shorter: I’m a white supremacist because whites are supreme. Nuthin wrong with that.
Wow. Just wow. At this rate, by October they’ll just be screaming “The
SheriffPresident is a ______ !”NO SHIT–HE REALLY SAYS THAT.
I see has found a home a V-Dare, an natural fit for him, and now he can be completely open and honest, and a plus for V-Dare cause nothing gives the imprimatur and resultant dignity than an english accent.
not touching that place with Cheney’s dick.
…
Wow. Just wow. At this rate, by October they’ll just be screaming “The Sheriff President is a ______ !”
If polling ever shows that they can win an election with it it is garaunteed. Currently they are whispering it in several states.
To a Malkin-reader, the world is a terrifying place full of demons threatening the holy and pure traditions of “fuck you I got mine”, isn’t it?
Their maps are littered with thousands of “Beyond here, there be Monsters” notes.
…
Wow. Just wow. At this rate, by October they’ll just be screaming “The Sheriff President is a ______ !”
Huh? No need to wait until October, they’ve been doing it for three years now.
Aaaaand now that “normal” posting is siback, so is “Slow down…” FYWP
To a Malkin-reader…
Assumes facts not in evidence.
…
It gets better.
“The
SheriffPresident is a ______ !”My money says some prominent conservative or low-level congresscritter will say it around mid-September.
Meanwhile, Rmoney tries to find a running mate who won’t overshadow him like Caribou Barbie did McCain: http://thinkprogress.org/election/2012/05/14/483539/for-vp-romney-is-looking-for-an-incredibly-boring-white-guy/
It gets better.
Sweeeet!!!
.
Aaaaand now that “normal” posting is siback, so is “Slow down…” FYWP
now I see what you mean.
…
Meanwhile, Rmoney tries to find a running mate who won’t overshadow him like Caribou Barbie did McCain:
They’ll have to build one, but do they possess the technology? I know that whatever they were using to power Darth Siths heart before he got it replaced, was almost certainly a step in the right direction, but I am not sure the AI is there yet.
…
They’ll have to build one, but do they possess the technology? I know that whatever they were using to power Darth Siths heart before he got it replaced, was almost certainly a step in the right direction, but I am not sure the AI is there yet.
Their last attempt met with some…unfortunate consequences.
Well why not just bring Darth Sith himself back? He seems to fit all the criteria: white, male, experienced, cruel, cold, calculating, unindicted, alive.
So, it’s MALKINSMA$H versus the web-startup community gardening lady made of 0’s & 1’s?
My money’s on Julia for this one.
They’ll have to build one, but do they possess the technology?
The Japanese already have the tchnology to build a white guy, now it’s just a matter of getting the right programming.
animus said,
May 14, 2012 at 13:18
It’s strange to see the phrase “Die, Julia, Die!” referring to someone other than Julia Gillard.
LOL. A dingo stole the Prime Minister.
Boring white guy? My money would be on T-Paw.
Just once I’d like to hear an actual small business owner say that, instead of the greasy, twitchy fuckup who sands and masks the cars before somebody paints them – tsam
I happened to know a small business owner back in my post-doc days who described himself as a recovering libertarian: when he was considering starting a business his greatest fear was that (1) he’d be taxed to death and (2) there would be too much paperwork involved in complying with government regulations. Once he got his business off the ground he realized that (1) if he was being taxed it meant he was making money in the first place which is not a bad thing and (2) he’s a smart guy and hence could somehow manage the challenge of filling out a few forms.
What he realized really was holding him back as a businessman is that he couldn’t even afford for his equally (if not more) talented wife to work for the business full time: his wife needed to keep her job so the family could have health care and other benefits from her work.
As I say, the best thing we could do if we really wanted to help small businesses and increase entrepreneurship in this country (don’t know if that’s a goal we should actually support, but for the sake of argument let’s agree with the glibertarian GOoPers of the chamber of miscommerce and say it is) is to have government funded health care and a more robust social security/public pension system.
The Japanese already have the tchnology to build a white guy, now it’s just a matter of getting the right programming. – Thread Bear
I like how the women approach the robot 1 at a time like the bad guys approach the hero in a martial arts movie. What would happen if the women all walked to the robot at once? Or were wearing something other than identical starchy outfits? Would the robot go berserk or something?
Also, is it just me or was that last young lady just a wee bit too interested in a possible, um, collision with that robot?
Meanwhile, the robot itself is too short and not nearly mechanical enough to be a credible VeeP choice if Romney is going for more robotic than he is. That robot would really overshadow Romney on the campaign trail. And may have a scandal or two in his past involving a young woman in an overstarched outfit …
What’s the phony lake for, huh?
Energy! Lots and lots of energy. A river flowing at roughly 220,000 cubic ft per minute, blocked by a 500′ tall and nearly mile wide dam. I don’t know how much gravitational energy is sitting there, but I think it’s somewhere near a fuckload.
NO! And I do not appreciate the reminder of that. Harumph!
Nah, that’s not slow
…
FOR A FIXIE!
(bah-dum-bumb, tsssh!) All week, veal, waitress, &c.
Although I wasn’t able to be on one of my various two-wheeled conveyances, self-powered or petrol-powered, I did get to be outside a bunch, and did absolutely NO yard work, so YAY!
Oh, and I did get to ride my bike to work today, and I’m actually leaving in about 15 minutes to ride the commuter bike to the trailhead and run a bit of singletrack. It’s an absolutely fucking beautiful day today so I cannot resist.
And I probably will never catch up with the last two threads… Oh well, outside is calling.
Boring white guy?
Dr. Christian Szell.
What about this more recent attempt?
My money is on Marco Rubio. He’s not white, but JUST white enough. He’s the great American success story, don’t know. Wore out his own bootstraps pulling his ass up by them.
I love the idea of Rubio. He’s pretty stupid and eminently mockable.
I love the one about telling the folks in the rich houses “I’ll be joining you soon.” which frankly sounds like you’re planning a home invasion.
tigris said,
The behavior of the [anglerfish] males is similar.
Oh I laughed.
I wasn’t able to be on one of my various two-wheeled conveyances, self-powered or petrol-powered
Then let me tell you about the AWESOME ride out Washougal River Rd., out to Lyle (including S. c’s Cook Something Road rec, up through Klickitat, back to the gorge through Glenwood and BZ Corner. Cross the bridge to 506 Columbia Street in Hood River for some reason or other. Alas, still having 80 miles to go I was limited in the amount of yeasty goodness I could enjoy. Back via Historic Columbia Highway, final stop to BS at Vista House. Spectacular.
I don’t know why Rmoney don’t man the fuck up and pick Paul Ryan. I mean, shit, the dude managed to singlehandedly wipe out that idolatry commandment, cuz all them righties are WORSHIPPING his unit like porn stars.
Heh, Paul Ryan would be great. Lots to pick apart there…granny-starver, Rand-worshipper… Good stuff, good stuff.
I love the one about telling the folks in the rich houses “I’ll be joining you soon.” which frankly sounds like you’re planning a home invasion.
That’s why they all have alarms, guns and great big dogs. I’d shoot him if he tried to “join” me. YUCK!
Heh, Paul Ryan would be great. Lots to pick apart there…granny-starver, Rand-worshipper… Good stuff, good stuff.
Plus he looks like a grown up Eddie Munster. That’s reason enough not to vote for him.
Don’t be mean to ol’ Dreamy Eyed Dumbo Ears.
What about this more recent attempt?
FEEL SHIRI’S FEAR!!
Don’t be mean to ol’ Dreamy Eyed Dumbo Ears.
I have to be mean to him. He’s a butthole.
So robotic asses are cool enough, if that’s what trips your trigger, but I am still waiting for a real life mecha-godzilla. I mean they even have a ton of nuclear reactors they aren’t even using anymore if they need a power source.
When he said that, I was like “What a dork.” I mean, first, I was like “Wow, that’s moronic.” But then the dork thing, totally.
Say, any of you glory-holers gonna be at Man’s Country tonight????
Tintin backed off, claiming a lack of condoms. Pussy.
Did someone say robotic ass?
Did someone say glory hole alley victim???
ROMNEY/ROBOASS 2012!
Rimmin the Mocha Messiah’s ass for yet another season, bitches!!
The Robass story was written in 1951and a mere 7 years later, Rick Santorum was born. Coincidence???
First they came for the robotic asses and I said nothing, because I wasn’t a robotic ass.
“Open the pod bay door, Robass”
ROMNEY/ROBOASS 2012!
The roboass is way more interesting and empathetic than Willard, so alas doesn’t have a chance. Does anyone have Joe Lieberman’s teratoma-inna-jar’s number?
That does sound like fun. I need to get my motorcycle out more often…
Tom Tomorrow says it best: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/05/14/1090839/-The-Austerions
“When he said that, I was like “What a dork.” I mean, first, I was like “Wow, that’s moronic.” But then the dork thing, totally.”
Oops. I quoted the wrong thing. Horrible day.
Mmmm, chocolate Buddha ass. Yummers.
Looks like Tintin has a new stalker. 🙁 He gets ALL THE GOOD STUFF!
But “Julia” is a pathetic figment of the progressive imagination.
“Julia” is realer than Reagan’s Cadillac-driving “Welfare Queen”.
This stalker seems to be under the impression that he is gay.
Mocha Messiah Messiah MESSIAH MESSIAH!
Ha ha, it’s funny because the Republicans nominated a guy who literally believes himself to be the chosen one foretold in the holy scriptures of his people.
Here we go again:
“try and make sure”
“that Obama won’t try and destroy?”
followed by the hopeful:
“to try to argue”
only to end with this two-fer:
“to try and do something, anything to try and prevent”
You don’t read the comments, do you, Cerberus? I’ve been trying to teach you something you should already know.
a guy who literally believes himself to be the chosen one foretold in the holy scriptures of his people.
IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY.
Of course she does. Obviously you don’t though or you would’ve seen that you had been personally addressed in a previous thread.
Here, I’ll sum it up for you so you don’t have to go looking:
Fuck right off!
IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY.
FOR GREAT JUSTICE!
This stalker seems to be under the impression that he is gay.
I was certainly under the impression that this stalker was gay.
daphne-
Apparently one of us doesn’t. I’ve already admitted that it’s a habit that scans a lot stronger for me based on my conversational tone and that my method is technically grammatically correct even though it annoys you. I even added a nice hat-tip joke to you about said issue.
I’m very sorry that this will likely continue to annoy you and I harbor no malice for that or claims of ignorance of the issue. We all have our grammar quirks that drive us insane, including about issues where what drives us nuts is “technically correct” as it were.
So I give you my apology here, cause, it’s probably not going to change any time soon. I write what scans for me and I try and edit most of my grammar foibles out, but I’m just not going to reliably catch that one or see it as incorrect to the extent that you do.
I liked my version better.
[pout]
OBS-
Well, maybe if I read comments, I’d have actually caught yours before I posted mine. But no, I’m too busy putting “and” after “to try” for the sole purpose of pissing off daphne.
Well, maybe if I read comments, I’d have actually caught yours before I posted mine. But no, I’m too busy putting “and” after “to try” for the sole purpose of pissing off daphne.
Cerb, you’re writing colloquial English and using a conversational style… there’s no need to cater to Daphne who only shows up to play grammar pedant, and who, frankly, should be out solving mysteries.
A co-worker has a phrase that she uses instead of dumassery – dumbassitude (silent b). She even used it in a meeting with an executive who thought a long words were better than plain ones. Went completely over his head. He embodied bullshit bingo
a guy who literally believes himself to be the chosen one foretold in the holy scriptures of his people.
IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY.
Everything proceeds according to the scenario.
. She even used it in a meeting with an executive who thought a long words were better than plain ones. Went completely over his head. He embodied bullshit bingo
The beats the time I used “absosmurfly” in a company e-mail.
Uh, “that” beats… pay no attention to the man behind the cretin!
Question for Civil War history nerds:
I’m currently reading a Facebook discussion on a conservative history nerd’s wall, in which someone asks him about how the U.S. military was “brought back together” after 1865. His response is that it went pretty well because a lot of the career officers were friends before the war, renewed their friendship after the war, and the draftees were inspired to follow their example (though, he hastens to add, “civilian profiteers from the North were a different matter, of course.”)
Does anyone know if that’s actually true? I’m perfectly willing to believe that a lot of West Pointers would have rekindled their friendships once it was all over, but it seems like a stretch to me that the military as a whole would have done the same. Especially given all the years of Reconstruction during which Union troops and Confederate veterans (e.g. the KKK) were shooting at each other in the South, and the way the “Lost Cause” and “wave the bloody shirt” narratives festered for years on both sides of the Mason Dixon line (in the former case, all the way until today).
I won’t direct this to Daphne in particular, but Cerberus’s posts are strong and memorable because of the intensity with which she writes them. In her mad rush to reveal the idiocy and madness of the Malkins of this world, she sometimes leaves out prepositions, even verbs, as we all do on first drafts (if you’ve ever written a very long piece, such as a novel or a monograph, you’ll find typos and grammatical misfits even on the 100th rereading).
Also, don’t any of you ever complain anymore that her posts are too long.
That’s a great question Chris.
I don’t have much information about the period directly following the Civil War.
I would guess that much of the Army was demobilized after the war and what wasn’t was out west fighting the various Indian wars.
I recently read a book (The Last Stand) about Custer, and apparently by 1876 the Army was mostly comprised of raw recruits. At least according to this book – a lot of the cavalry at Little Big Horn could barely ride their horses or fire their rifles.
IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY.
Everything proceeds according to the scenario.
Kenneth, what is the frequency?
One of the first things that happened after the Civil War is that all the brevets reverted to their permanent rank. Men who had gotten used to being generals were unhappy as colonels and resigned their commissions.
As for the Little Bighorn I heartily recommend “Son of the Morning Star”. Connell’s authorial voice is a pleasure.
Second on SotMS and, actually, everything Connell has ever written.
I would guess that much of the Army was demobilized after the war and what wasn’t was out west fighting the various Indian wars.
Good point. I’d speculate that the people who stayed in the military after the Civil War probably did reconcile if only because they had to, but that the citizen soldiers who went home afterward probably nursed grudges for a bit longer.
I had the perfect business plan, ransoming CEOs to back to their companies but GUESS WHAT?!!?
That’s a fucking crime! God damn government enforces it too!
Obama is completely killing the work ethic in America!
As for the Little Bighorn I heartily recommend “Son of the Morning Star”. Connell’s authorial voice is a pleasure.
I have it, but I haven’t read it yet.
Don’t let Daphne try and piss you off, Ms. C.
I’ll take the Cheyenne and Lakota oral history of the battle over any historian.
Why did they name the battlefield after the loser anyways? Shouldn’t it be the “Sitting Bull Memorial Battlefield”?
Sitting Bull foresaw it but Crazy Horse and Gall were the tactical brains behind the victory. Crazy Horse was an amazing tactician.
Custer did however stop Jeb Stuart at Gettysburg. Even if he screwed up everything else in his career, that still counts for something.
He was a crazy brave SOB, I’ll give him that. He put his own ass out on the line and you have to respect that.
Custer did however stop Jeb Stuart at Gettysburg.
Yeah, but Jeb’s asshole brother George W Stuart still fucked everything up.
Custer died for your sins: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oY_a-HjdiOE
Cerb, did you read/write/talk in a foreign language for some time before writing this piece? Your English is … awkward. I point this out because if I speak German for a couple of days my English will get a bit strained. Your syntax and use of particles is idiosyncratic and my BRANEZ had a sad trying to follow you.
Either that, or sleep deprivation. On both our parts. And with that, cheers! Going to bed.
*I meant to say, your English is awkward today. In general, your English is not awkward in the least.
Teh Ho is in Denver at a conference. YIPPEE! Salmon every night! (if anything would drive us apart it would be his lack of reverence for salmon). Tomorrow I shall make Robert May’s salmon – poached in red wine with orange slices and nutmeg. Tonight it’s simple lox, perfectly scrambled eggs with chives, toasted sourdough. Simply dressed mesclun. Heater Allen Pils.
“We will fight you to the death.Better to die a thousand deaths than submit to live under you and your negro allies”- General John Bell Hood in a letter to General Sherman
I’m guessing he didn’t do a whole lot of rapprochement.
The beats the time I used “absosmurfly” in a company e-mail.
that is so awesome! i also like dumbassitude…how much will y’all give me to use ‘bag of tits,’ ‘holy fuckaroo’ or ‘tittyfucking’ at my board meeting on wednesday?
“We will fight you to the death.Better to die a thousand deaths than submit to live under you and your negro allies”- General John Bell Hood in a letter to General Sherman
“Your proposal is acceptable,” Sherman no doubt replied, and then proceeded to burn Atlanta to a crisp.
I’ll take the Cheyenne and Lakota oral history
For that I’d recommend this which I have and is worth the couple of hundred bucks but Connell is no ordinary historian and SotMS is an excellent examination of the event. Where’s drdick, I bet he’s worth hearing on the subject.
At least according to this book – a lot of the cavalry at Little Big Horn could barely ride their horses or fire their rifles.
According to the Wiki, it wasn’t that bad, but 20% inexperience is bad enough:
There are other first-person accounts.
Waiting for Bootsy’s autograph.
.
Based on your current occupation, I’m guessing it has something to do with water treatment.
I’ll throw in a twelver of Grain Belt, but need vid!
Substance, that is my favorite account as well.
notagator-
I wrote and edited it during a really high fever. I can’t help but feel that’s partially responsible.
I can’t help but feel that if you don’t like the syntax and grammar, there’s no need to read it. But thanks for trying, daphne.
Who fucking does that? Nothing about the substance, just snide comments about grammar. Get lost, daphne.
Who fucking does that? Nothing about the substance, just snide comments about grammar. Get lost, daphne.
i would say it’s someone who has the obsessive need (probably based on low self esteem) to ALWAYS be right…which is typical of the wingnut commenters…
Yeah, I assumed it was just somebody with a strong reaction to that particular construction, but holy Hell, when Cerberus herself responds to you IN TWO SEPARATE POSTS and you ignore it, well, it gets difficult to continue to find you anything other than an insufferable asshole.
You shall address her as “General” daphne. Her army of Pedants is fortified with adverbs, nouns and adjectives. It is financed by a syntax.
Nothing about the substance, nothing about the bubba
Attention, South:
We won. You lost.
Get over it.
yankee go home!
Romane Eunt Domus!
CarthagoAtlanta delenda est!redundancy, indeed…
Malkin bears a striking resemblance to Batboy.
historians, weigh in…crack’d history or true?
The Ashcroft quote is a fake.
historians, weigh in…crack’d history or true?
The stuff about the 95%+ mortality rate from infectious disease is certainly true. I used to wonder if religious people considered that God’s will.
bbkf, that is pretty damn accurate.
Hey, JP, is that you at a Parliament concert…cuz why aren’t you dancing?
If daphne is a stickler for good grammar, I pray to Allah she never reads my blog, which gives new meaning to the phrase “casual writing style.”
Meh, I think Cerb does just fine.
bbkf, that is pretty damn accurate.
having minored in history, i am slightly embarrassed to admit that i didn’t know a bunch of that stuff…well, not in that detail anyhoo…i mostly studied history of religion and lewis and clark…well, okay, i stalked clark posthumously…but that’s ALL THAT HAPPENED!
Stickling the grammar.
W T Sherman said,
May 15, 2012 at 18:42
Stickling the grammar.
i should have known this was you…
Man, Tecumseh Sherman liked to talk about jerking off.
Man, Tecumseh Sherman liked to talk about jerking off.
now you make it obvious…
Meh, I think Cerb does just fine.
Cerb does better than just fine. She wields the razor-sharp blade of logic like a samurai sword.
She’s the literary equivalent of Uma Thurman in Kill Bill.
The stuff about the 95%+ mortality rate from infectious disease is certainly true. I used to wonder if religious people considered that God’s will.
I believe many of them did. They thought it was divine providence “clearing the land” for them to take it over.
Good luck with that, guys: http://realestate.yahoo.com/promo/paypal-co-founder-to-build-a-city-on-the-sea.html
How long before that degenerates into Bioshock?
A bunch of privilaged snots who think they’ve hit home runs because they haven’t yet realized they were born on third base going Galt and trying to actually build their own society? What could possibly go wrong?
re: grammar
Don’t go changing to try and please me, you never let me down before.
Unless you can’t become Christie Brinkley in which case see you later.
How long before that degenerates into Bioshock?
My fingers, they are crossed.
A bunch of privilaged snots who think they’ve hit home runs because they haven’t yet realized they were born on third base going Galt and trying to actually build their own society? What could possibly go wrong?
A cross between “The Mist” and “The Walking Dead?” Again: fingers crossed.
damnit-damnit-damnit
How long before that degenerates into Bioshock?
Damn, you beat me to it. That’s exactly what came to mind. Well, that and the crazy zillionnaire from The Spy Who Loved Me.
A bunch of privilaged snots who think they’ve hit home runs because they haven’t yet realized they were born on third base going Galt and trying to actually build their own society? What could possibly go wrong?
Well, no: I suspect these guys will maintain their old citizenships and all the benefits that derive from it (if, for example, Rapture ever sails through Somali waters and is attacked by pirates, they’ll fully expect the U.S. military to come bail them out: hell, if the ship sinks, they’ll expect the closest available coast guard to come and save their asses).
That, and the ship is supposed to be anchored “just an hour from Silicon Valley,” so I seriously doubt if it will actually function on its own – the parasite will remain attached to the economy of a Big Government run nation-state. They’ll just, you know, pretend that it’s not, trumpet the success of their Ayn Randian utopia, and conveniently ignore all the ways in which they’re still dependent on the nation-state world.
God damn it. Okay, paragraphs 1 and 3 were supposed to be in Italic, not the rest.
Oh great. Italics purgatory. Anyone want to go for the bold?
What could possibly go wrong?
Where to begin? I wonder if the thing would turn turtle in a really big storm? The article says they’re planning on being half an hour from Silicon Valley, I assume by helicopter (?). Does that put them in international waters? And you gotta figure that all those assholes are going to produce a lot of poop…
IMPORTANT.
re: Blueseed-steading
LOL. We’re on a boat! Motherfucker look at me, I’m on a boat!
So teh plan is to float a boat just outside Silicon Valley and let all sorts of foreigners with no visas or even any proper identification at all, live and work there. I’m sure it’ll work great. Requiring no additional security measures for folks from the boat to come on shore.
Also too, extra bonus points for naming teh thing after pantsu anime.
Hasn’t this Paypal jerkoff been talking about this for a while now?
Pryme made the world all crooked and slanted and such as. I might fall off my chair.
Hmmm… trying something…
Never mind.
It wasn’t me. It was like that when I got here…………..
…crack’d history or true?
Smells fine to me. Never heard about the Colonials being inspired by the Six Nations ( 1722- ____ ) confederacy, but it hardly seems far-fetched.
However, on the other pseudopod … arguing that “teh dumb honkies had no experience of alliances” is bosh. More than a few Italian & German city-states & fiefdoms had formed posses for either war or commerce that produced successful partnerships galore for them to learn from, all the way back to medieval times. IMNVHO I think the New England Colonies’ reluctance to unite wasn’t a DERP thang, it was a GIMME thang – nobody wanted someone else’s problems inflicting a hit on their local resource loot.
Also too, article needs an Honorable Mention for the brutal impact of Amerindians & Euros exchanging syphilis & gonhorrea on both Old & New Worlds. The socioeconomic blow that trade-off of STDs delivered on two continents during the 16th Century was probably EPIC.
On the plus side, I know now how the slanty world happens. I just don’t know how to fix it.
♣
Well I’ve done gone tried and fixed it fer ya, but no amount of </i> is unslanting this thread.
Welcome to the club. Use your powers wisely.
Yeah, FYWP is stripping out all the ones we try to add. There’s bound to be a way to trick it to allow the extra closing tag through, but I’m not stumbling upon it.
I’ll try. It’s taking some willpower to not make it bold too, just ’cause.
</i>
Their little paradise on the waves will be less Galt’s Gulch and more the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory. It will be an offshore sweatshop, where workers will work for starvation wages out of sight of land, and more importantly, labor laws. It will be like a Chinese sweatshop crossed with the Scientologists’ Sea Org. If you start writing your expose now, you will be in a good position to sell your screenplay when this thing sinks/explodes/mutinies/burns.
⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁⌁
There's always the code tag...
IIRC, it went:
Smallpox Old –> New World
Syphilis New –> Old World
The difference from a geopolitical standpoint, of course, is that smallpox spreads with horrible speed, while syphilis can only be transmitted up close and personal. That left the Europeans with a gruesome advantage.
I wonder if ASCII goatse looks the same all slanted? Shall we find out?
…
No? Fine.
I like the <code> tag too:
10 PRINT "LOLBUTTS!"
20 GOTO 10
ᑥ
the parasite will remain attached to the economy of a Big Government run nation-state. They’ll just, you know, pretend that it’s not, trumpet the success of their Ayn Randian utopia, and conveniently ignore all the ways in which they’re still dependent on the nation-state world.
so, in other words…business as usual…
?
that’s funny!
OBS, COBOL is back ? I’m not obsolete anymore? Can it be true?If slanted?
Hmmm… trying to and something…
there…now it’s daphne approved!
Never heard about the Colonials being inspired by the Six Nations ( 1722- ____ ) confederacy, but it hardly seems far-fetched.
this i heard muchly at the old alma mater…
Old code never dies, it just gets harder and more expense to maintain.
so, in other words…business as usual…
Prezactly.
Did I mention? At the facelifted catblog, I cleaned up the blawgroll, and added BBBB, vs and bbkf.
.
The population figures in the cracked article are pretty astounding. Weird arse Orson Scott Card wrote an interesting story before The Unhinging about going back in time to get the Amer-Indians ready to resist. It’s quite good, well I thought so, 15 years ago.
What are you talking about?! They’re charging $1,600 a month for Silicon Valley area office space. That’s so ultra-premium, no sweatshop could afford to operate on board Galt’s Floating Gulch.
Just for today, kid, I’d skip the tartar sauce.
I cleaned up the blawgroll, and added BBBB, vs and bbkf
dammit! now i actually have to start posting again! gdang it, i miss maxine…hubbkf just got word from the computer geniuses and her physical problems are a bad display? and it’ll run about 600 clams to fix…and she’s over five years old…so, it sounds like we are going to save up for a new mac…and i will be stuck using behemoth betty the dell laptop from work…but, by all that is tittyfucking holy, i will blog again!!!
thanks for waking me up, jp…
Tag fix?
This used to work on slacktivist…
On the plus side, I know now how the slanty world happens
C’mon Sub –
“ONE OF US
ONE OF US”
Only way to fix it is to contact Sadly,No! Industires Amalgamated General Consolidated also Inc. too customer service and have them do something unspeakable with a hamster.
Let us not speak of that
██████████████████
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███ █████ █████
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I didn’t know Richard Gere works for Sadly No! Industries Amalgamated General Consolidated, etc. Who else could be in charge of hamster abuse?
I concur with Wangchuck, King of Dragons. They probably love sweatshop labor, but they’ll continue to leave their sweatshops in third world countries. I suspect they want more of a country club atmosphere for Floating AynRandistan, and don’t want any smelly working-class people intruding on it.
Mr McGravitas’s Ned Kelly pictures are pictures of Ned Kelly
I want to know when we are going to give equality under the law to all polygamous relationships. The Polygaphobes need to go.
Only squares are against polygony.
I didn’t know Richard Gere works for Sadly No! Industries Amalgamated General Consolidated, etc.
No, Gere is in charge of gerbil abuse.
A.) 1600 bucks isnt that much, especially on an ultra-exclusive upscale property
B.) These jokers my not want working class people on their little floating shithole…but who do you think is going to maintain those green spaces and apartments? Who’s going to be in charge of waste disposal? Janitorial services for the offices/stores?
Good luck with that, guys: http://realestate.yahoo.com/promo/paypal-co-founder-to-build-a-city-on-the-sea.html
I’m no pirate lawyer, but don’t ships have to be registered with a real state, under whose law they operate? If they can actually be stateless, can they be so close to US jurisdiction, or perhaps even in US territorial waters, and not be covered by US law? Coast Guard actions in regards to smugglers makes me doubt. Also: good luck getting those work visas with your Sealand passports, and enjoy your many future personal encounters with immigration.
Don’t talk to us, that sounds like a question for the aspiring Mormon in Chief.
Fuckable robots.
According to the Straight Dope guys, “Ships without flags, and those that fly flags of convenience are subject to the jurisdiction of any State. While some scholars disagree, national courts have upheld convictions based on such arrests. “
Fuckable robots.
Of course. I’m so STUPID.
Cruise lines already inflict abuses on their all-but-indentured workers that would be actionable at best, or criminal on land. If we extrapolate that to the working conditions likely to be created by a bunch of Randian wankers, well, I am going to stick to my predictions for unpleasant drama.
We believe that consenting adults should be able to engage in loving, committed polygamous relationships.
Is that so wrong?
“We believe that consenting adults should be able to engage in loving, committed polygamous relationships.
Is that so wrong?”
No, it’s not.
Easy-peasy. Next question.
“We believe that consenting adults should be able to engage in loving, committed polygamous relationships.
Is that so wrong?”
Mitt??? Is that you???
Oh, I’m sure they’ll have as many working class stiffs as it takes to take care of their immediate needs like that. It’s just the notion of moving an entire sweatshop to that island that seems a bit far-fetched to me.
Ok, good, so you endorse full marriage equality for polygamous relationships.
But that’s still not full marriage equality.
We need to include children too. Some people believe man-boy love to be the most caring and intense form of love. Who are you to impose your morality on them?
We need FULL SPECTRUM marriage equality for LGBTQAAPPDN persons (PPND stands for Polygamous, Pedophilic, Necrophilic, and Dendrofilic) persons.
I believe someone’s syphilitic mind is getting the better of them.
Bigot! Polygaphobe! Fascist!
What a surprise: a moron troll doesn’t understand the concept of “content.” Where are my badgers…
Some people believe asinine extremes to be the most caring and intense form of debate.
Whoops…consent. Obviously my typo invalidates my argument about consent.
Hey. I was saying that it was going to be a sweatshop boat. Maybe it’s teh fact that teh real estate collapse hasn’t popped LEAFS SUCK’s bubble and my perspective is skewed, but $1,600 a month for fully serviced office space is peanuts.
Note that it’s only half of the $1,600 that goes in as rent, and it has to cover living space too. At current rates that gets you about 300 square feet.
People can’t consent to be in a polygamous relationship?
Sure, a dead body can’t consent. But neither can a dildo. Why have so much respect for one random collection of cells over another?
And when a dog humps a persons leg, he sure seems to be “consenting” to me!
Pedophilaphobe! Bigot! Fascist! Why are you against Marriage Equality?
Quit stealing my act!
FFS. Damn you fat fingers. 30
0square feet. Thirty.Wow, strikeout disappears when it’s already italicised. Oh well, wev.
Lets call Sandra Rinomato and find out!
People can’t consent to be in a polygamous relationship?
No, you useless pustule, they can. That’s why no one here is making a big deal about polygamy. Children can’t consent and animals can’t consent. When you talk about sex with children you are promoting rape. That’s why you are garbage.
For Marriage Equality Now!
You know what else? Since we’re redefining marriage, why can’t it also include hunting down stupid imbeciles who think slippery slope arguments are genius and castrating them with cheese graters?
BECAUSE TEH BULLSHITE YOU ARE TALKING ABOOT IS ALREADY ILLEGAL. Not as in “those relationships are not recognized by law” – rather teh complete opposite. They are recognized by law – as felonies.
I’m in favor of asshole moron trolls fucking themselves with running chainsaws.
Why don’t you try it, if you’re not against Asshole Moron Troll Marriage Equality?
Hey MEN, I never thought I’d be writing this but I’m starting to come around to your point of view. Must be the italics.
The ancient Greeks and Romans sure seemed to think they could.
And homosexual acts used to be illegal too. Until very recently. Thank goodness we’ve overcome that fear, bigotry, and religious superstition. I think it’s time to eliminate are polygaphobic, pedophilaphobic, and bestaliaphobic laws as well. Keep your morality off my body.
Hey if this guy wants to be in a committed polyamorous relationship with half dozen Portuguese Men-of-war, a gross of leeches and a score or two of puff adders, I for one will not stand in his way.
The ancient Greeks and Romans sure seemed to think they could.
Then build your time machine, go back then and you can rape chidren as much as you want. Live here in the present and you’re garbage for even suggesting it.
The ancient Greeks and Romans sure seemed to think they could.
well, they also thought slavery was cool, vomitoriums were awesome and that immortal gods existed…
It’s not rape. It’s man-boy love. Why are you standing in the way of True Love? That’s just your pedophilaphobia talking. Try to see past your adultasexism.
I guess they have internet access in prison these days.
Again, it just might be the italics but…
It’s not rape. It’s man-boy love. Why are you standing in the way of True Love? That’s just your pedophilaphobia talking. Try to see past your adultasexism.
You want to promote rape, go for it. Conservatives in general don’t seem to have a problem with it, and you’re free to suggest the idea as much as you want. You’ve tagged yourself a child-rapist…good work, asshole.
Pope Ratzinger, is that you?
It’s not rape. It’s man-boy love
This is Sparta!!!
No prob. Lookit, you want to agitate for polyamorous pedophiliac beastality, go right ahead. Best of luck to you, it’s a tough argument to make without getting lynched. I certainly don’t agree with practitioners of polyamorous pedophiliac beastiality, my continued carnal relations with your mom notwithstanding.
Also too, we’re certainly going to think a lot less of you based on your complete handwaving of teh entire concept of “consent”. Teh mark of a criminal deranged sociopath is what that is.
People may not support man-boy love now, but give it a few decades. After all, homosexual acts were once spurned and seen as disgusting but we’re leaving that bigotry behind. The same will happen soon and then all LGBTQAAPPDNBs will have full equality!
I call… whatshisface, the Catholic troll way back in February whose name I can’t remember. He had real problems with the concept of consent too.
(Also believed the fact that Christianity eliminated slavery after proclaiming it legal and moral for centuries on end proved that it was a solid foundation for objective and timeless morality. Figured out how to square that circle yet, pal?)
your complete handwaving of teh entire concept of “consent”.
He’s a child-rapist wannabe. He doesn’t do consent.
And only 50 years ago, it was a tough to argue for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender equality without getting lynched. With the progress made there, its just a matter of time for us PPNDBs.
Worst slippery-slope argument evah!
Why are you against Asshole Moron Troll/Running Chainsaw Marriage Equality?
Post a video of yourself fucking yourself with a running chainsaw while screaming “THIS IS JUST LIKE GAY MARRIAGE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIGGGRH!!!!!” Then we’ll believe you’re arguing in good faith.
Why should LGBTs have equality but not those who want man-animal, man-boy, polygamous/polyamorous and man-tree sex?
Oh, and why not equality for man-corpse sex?
Why should LGBTs have equality but not those who want man-animal, man-boy, polygamous/polyamorous and man-tree sex?
Because you’re the only rapist-wannabe in this conversation.
“animals can’t consent.”
I think we need an expert to weigh in on this. Micky Kaus?
“Oh, and why not equality for man-corpse sex?”
Depends on the sex of the corpse of course.
Very quick and dirty addition of the anglerfish head to the picture at the top of the post. Gimp has made quite a few changes since I last regulary used the thing and I spent very little time one it, but the angle of the fishead once scaled down works beautifully.
here ya go
Infortunately this is gonna make me do a Malkin image search while looking for more angler fish pics. That particular sneer of hers is pretty common.
oi.
.
Marriage Equality Now–(M.E.N!)
We see what you’re up to with throwing on the pedophilia. It’s same argument as dogs and ice cream and you’re a fucking moron. Go to hell and die. NOW.
d00d.
1. I actually agree with teh basic premise – that it is presumptuous for any society to shackle their ancestors and weigh them down with “moral laws” that may bear little or no relationship to what their reality will be like. This is (one of the many) reasons I disagree with teh whole “traditional definition of marriage” bullshit argument.
2. That’s why I think teh arguments for society to accept stuff should be made based on what we think and know – now. Based on today’s morality and binding on today’s population. Caveat – I am aware that I am only able to have this position because of teh sacrifices and hard work made by civil rights activists of the past. I am aware that this is all only operative because one of the morally binding precepts widely held by non-conservative-fuck-you-I-got-mine-assholes is that minorities should be protected from teh tyrrany of teh majority. That we respect basic human rights and dignity.
3. For fuck’s sake. Consent. It is not a difficult concept. And pretending like it is no biggie is TEH FUCKING CREEPIEST ASS SHIT FUCK DAMN YOWZA SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP IMMEDIATELY YOU TICKING TIME BOMB!
“Because you’re the only rapist-wannabe in this conversation.”
Hmmm…not sure if actually a wannabe…
Trolly troll seems to think an awful lot about the sexitime of other people. I would not be surprised if he has not gone to great expense purchasing optical delivery systems roe his remote peeping activities and planted wireless web cams pointing through windows his telescopes can not reach from the comfort of his bedchambers.
This one has peeping Tom written all over him.
…
Yes, we’re all supposed to clutch our pearls and proclaim “What hath we wrought by daring to treat the fhags like human beings. Thank the lord that MEN! showed us the error of our slippery slopes!”
Why should LGBTs have equality but not those who want……man-tree sex?
One word – splinters.
One word in favor >>> SAP
Maybe , even some jazz hands and saying “Lawks a’mercy”
Take one of the “not”‘s out of the second sentence to lose the double negative and you will catch my drift.
I think that Tom Peepers is exposing himself for what he is.
…
One word – splinters.
As someone who is currently enjoying Ben & Jerry’s Maple Blondie ice cream, I want my maple syrup unadulterated.
“That we respect basic human rights and dignity.”
Which is why we don’t support victimizing children, NAMBLA man.
“Why should LGBTs have equality but not those who want man-animal, man-boy, polygamous/polyamorous and man-tree sex?”
One of these things is not like the others, no matter how hard idiots pretend they are all the same. But you know what? Slippery slope done convinced me, now I think NOBODY should be allowed to get married. The Bible proves rape, incest, polygamy and child-marriage are unavoidable consequences of heterosexual marriage, so obviously IT MUST BE STOPPED. Hell, maybe ONLY homo nups should be allowed, as it doesn’t have the horrendous track record.
^THIS
Ok wingnutdouchefacetrollstupidgrossgrossperson:
Again: Google the term “False Equivalence”. If you are unable to understand the definition, come back here we’ll try to explain it to you. I’m not confident you’ll ever get it, based on the fact that you’re willing to compare LGBT marriage with pedophilia, but we’ll try. I feel it’s our duty to make the world a less stupid place.
Lynn Lavner: “The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love heterosexuals. It’s just that they need more supervision.”
One of these things is not like the others,
Why are kids watching Sesame Street so good at this and wingnuts so blantantly inadequate** at it?
**There’s more than one meaning to this
In the same vein MEN!, there are things you can learn by sticking your tongue in a light socket that you can learn in no other way.
First of all, you didn’t say anything about polyamorous groups marrying. Second of all, there’s a difference between polyamory/polygamy and pedophilia. If you don’t understand the difference, then I’m not sure what else to say. And I see other people are trying to teach you about consent. Lot of good that will do, I’m sure.
It sounds like the troll is into some pretty freaky things. Deal with that with your therapist, troll, not us.
re: man-tree sex
Related?
Oh dear.
tigris 1000
troll 0
Pot leads to heroin.
Everyone knows pot leads to kettle.
Ironic that Slippery Slope arguments keep being used to oppose the pro-civilization, pro-progress “Steep Hill” perspective … let alone that so much social evolution has happened & keeps on happening, despite just how steep (& how often littered with bear-grease, ball-bearings & Pam™ by the anti-civilization, anti-progress motherfuckers) this Steep Hill up out of Fuckface Valley (humankind’s traditional collective homeland) has been to mount.
Everyone knows pot leads to kettle.
Which then leads the horse to water.
I gotta find me a pair of skis, stat!
.
Talk about a woody…
for me it leads to Ketel
I’ve heard ketel exercises are a good thing for women.
Teh idea seems to be that if you have enough financial backing, you can call yourself a ‘privateer’ rather than a ‘pirate’ and be safe from the type of nanny-state interventions experienced by Somalian nautical entrepreneurs.
Imma guessing that a search of Mr Paypal’s bookshelves would reveal a dog-eared copy of Niven & Pournelle’s ‘Oath of Fealty’.
“for me it leads to Ketel”
Pshaw. You want *decent* vodka, track down a bottle of the Danzka 50%.
“I’ve heard ketel exercises are a good thing for women.”
Men too! Also.
Ah, privateering, the original state-sponsored terrorism.
PENIS.
SO marriage-equality troll is proclaiming himself as a paedophile now?
I suppose it’s nice to know who we’re dealing with.
But are those slopes slippery?
Is Kansas corny?
Wait. I thought privateering was an euphemism for genital piercings.
Ah, privateering, the original
state-sponsored terrorismfree-market capitalism.“But are those slopes slippery?”
Doesn’t matter – that’s why God gave us Boy Butter.
So I should NOT spread that on my toast?
I’ll take “What things shouldn’t I spread on my toast?” for $250.
oooooh…i want to click on the links so. bad. but i dasn’t…or are they swf?
or safe for work…i’m pretty sure they are NOT single white female…
Mountaineers have skills for dealing with mountains… engineers have skills with engines…
Show us your toast!
“Why should LGBTs have equality but not those who want man-animal, man-boy, polygamous/polyamorous and man-tree sex?”
Should people like yourself, who eat camel dicks, have equality too?
Yup. I mean, there’s no nudity on the entry* page.
Dear other Daphne:
“…for you and I.” Jim Morrison
poetic license
Dear C: then by all means continue to sound childish and unfamiliar with other languages, which I have on good authority that you’re not. Infinitives: they’re one word in the other Romance tongues.
Others who bothered: I learned many years ago that many libs are just as, if not more, conformist authoritarians as anyone else. Now let’s get started deleting every comment not containing substance. Dwindle to a handful?
My toast is boring. No religious figures on it.
Is that how teh LGBTQ manage to cope with teh glacial rate of progress? They have skills for coping with queues?
Well yeah. Substance cant be here all day.
Dear daphne,
FOR FSM SAKE JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY AND GO AWAY.
But is it made from real boys?
“many libs are just as, if not more, conformist authoritarians as anyone else.”
Grammarian Wannabe uses Sword Of Unearned Credibility, casts Incoherent Fallacy spell.
Cost: +75 damage, -15 magic & lose a turn.
Whoa daphne daphne daphne. Cerb’s actually apologized for offending you and your sense of formal communication that somehow precludes capitalizing Proper Nouns (too proper by far IMO, especially compared to teh antics your mom gets up to).
I shall also agree that there are libtards who are jackboot licking authoritarians. Just don’t see it as a relevant comment here. Unless you have some sort of examples that support your non-sequitur “You are teh real Hitlers”.
What the fuck are you on about now, you hideous troll beast? For a being claiming to care so much about language, you certainly can’t manage to make a clear point with it.
Shorter me: boring troll is boring.
“…for you and I.” Jim Morrison
poetic license
proper usage, not poetic license…you and i are the subject, no?
Also too. Hoping for it to be good, considering teh ironic assertion that rigid (heh) obedience to formal grammar is teh only thing keeping us from totalitarian dystopia.
Rigid. Hee hee.
no, bb. “For” is a preposition. Would you EVER say “for I”? You is both subjective and objective, since the days when there were “thou” and “thee.”
And thanks, Pup, for demonstrating my point. Until recently I thought Kos was THE place for loyal servitude.
Substance has his own blog. Go there if you like him so much.
Another episode in Republicans missing the point:
And missing the point in response:
Mein Gott. Es gibt keine ultimative Wahnsinn.
I don’t see any slopes or slipping, just various proposals to be judged on their merits. If we’re told we must slip into Bad Proposal Y because Good Proposal X was agreed upon, my conclusion is that somebody’s analysis is off.
Speaking of trolls, we watched “Troll Hunter” the movie on netflix and thoroughly enjoyed it. Not a classic or anything, but well worth seeing:
http://www.trollhunterfilm.com/
I have complained in the past that ‘slippery elms’ are misleadingly named.
Has nothing to do with loyalty and servitude. Has everything to do with you being a dull twatwaffle with nothing to contribute.
no, bb. “For” is a preposition. Would you EVER say “for I”?
oh, yeah…duh…my bad…
Note to self: Do not let Smut around my trees.
” You is both subjective and objective, since the days when there were “thou” and “thee.””
Thereby demonstrating that language changes. AWESOME SELFPWN!
Everyone likes to see my woodcuts.
thanks, bb. What you did is called pseudogrammar – something may sound wrong but not wrong enough not to sound super-correct. Two pronouns connected by “and” have no bearing on the matter. Meanwhile pup demonstrates his/her alignment with Jim Treacher.
And Bitter: I’m not the one who brought up substance. It was an attack word of choice against me.
No, I never taught English. I was the nerd who paid attention in 6th grade and figured I might as well learn to diagram sentences if it was what the teacher was forcing upon us. It was easy and it stuck.
I have complained in the past that ‘slippery elms’ are misleadingly named.
However, it is true that a dogwood’s bark is worse than its bite.
No, pup. That was a complete non-sequitur. But, again, thanks for the demonstration.
Substance has his own blog. Go there if you like him so much.
i JUST got this…
Hmm:
“I felt great trepidation, for I knew not what I had done by feeding the troll.”
That reads just fine to me, but perhaps if we review this in a historical context, we might see that-
Wait, what am I saying:
Fuck right off, daphne!
I won’t AHEM Bitter Scribe.
Advice to VS: Do not plant Casuarinas, “Commonly known as the she-oak, sheoak, ironwood, or beefwood”.
Just asking for trouble.
Except that substance was someone else’s complaint. It kinda destroys the punchline.
I was the nerd who paid attention in 6th grade and figured I might as well learn to diagram sentences if it was what the teacher was forcing upon us. It was easy and it stuck.
we moved around a lot during my schooling years and i did not learn sentence diagramming until i was in college as a non-trad…by that time my brain was a bit atrophied…
At the end of the slippery slope do you find the True Scotsman?
“shorter OBS: and that’s why I DO say “for I.”
Yet when corrected, bb, you readily acknowledged your error. I’d say we’re good.
I won’t AHEM Bitter Scribe.
i meant to include your comment, vs…it took me from that point to the second one to get it…
Daphne, you don’t fucking get it.
Your good opinion is important to NO ONE here.
At the end of the slippery slope do you find the True Scotsman?
…and his pot of
goldporridge.I wonder why I don’t have any friends? I’m so likeable!
I’m just funnin’ ya. Also I’m a desperately insecure person who needs constant validation. Just ask Jennifer. I think if I don’t get quoted in her calendar, I may start wearing black eyeliner and wear bangs over my eye.
Ok, Daphne, we’ll bite. Please tell us why you feel grammar is so important in this particular forum. I guess the reasons escape me since I would never dream of dropping in on a place like this to give the authors a snotty reprimand because I don’t like the way they talk. So defend your actions. I’m dying to know why you expected to escape that without getting beat up.
…which is why bbkf has decided to speak for him/herself. That excludes at least two of us from the NO ONE category, BS.
And you know what? some say also, too.
I’m actually much less offended by the pedantry than I am by the unsupported allegation that the liberals are real authoritarians. *facepalm*
I think if I don’t get quoted in her calendar, I may start wearing black eyeliner and wear bangs over my eye.
Sexy and I know it!
Oh shit–THAT WAS A SENTENCE FRAGMENT! I’m terribly sorry daffney.
tsam speaks for “us.” I explained it above, zillions of comments earlier by now. Now I’d like to know why my opposite “snots” decided not to ignore it. Defend yourself – and that’s an order.
Conformist, authoritarian libs. I remember the 70s. Hippies were the worst offenders. I know; I tried to become one.
Wow, bbkf has a new online
friendstalker! Lucky.Liberal authoritarianism is much more rare, if it makes you feel better. It shows up most often in blog comments where the blogger is knee-jerkedly defended.
Here is some carefully crafted grammar in response to that cogent, clearly worded, and not-at-all-batshit-insane comment:
LOLWUT?
Sorry. You’re not in my chain of command. And if you don’t know what chain of command is, you’re not someone to take orders from.
I’m just funnin’ ya. Also I’m a desperately insecure person who needs constant validation. Just ask Jennifer. I think if I don’t get quoted in her calendar, I may start wearing black eyeliner and wear bangs over my eye.
o rly? i didn’t even THINK about mentioning getting a mention on the jennifer’s calendar because i know that i would never make a comment that would be calendar worthy and i didn’t want that pointed out by everyone here…now that’s some insecurity, sistah…
I suspect you also consider yourself a Latin maven. “Non sequitur” indeed. Here’s the deal sweetcheeks, do we still say :thee” and “thou?” Well DO WE? On account of because* if we don’t THEN THE LANGUAGE CHANGED. Didn’t it? HUH? I CAN’T HEAR YOU! Using the fact that the language has changed to prove that the language has not changed means YOU’RE THE REAL NON SEQUITURIST!
*phrase used in some old timey movie that has struck with me for many decades
OK, really, I’m going to stop feeding it… right after this.
In what sane world does some random pedant visit multiple times, insult the host’s grammar, and then have the gall to act like we’re the authoritarians for complaining about it.
Trolls make no fucking sense.
tsam speaks for “us.” I explained it above, zillions of comments earlier by now. Now I’d like to know why my opposite “snots” decided not to ignore it. Defend yourself – and that’s an order.
I didn’t see it, and since it was zillions of comments back, kindly explain it one more time.
What’s an “opposite snot”?
Pretend there’s a question mark at the end of that sentence, m’kay?
Huh, major. You don’t get it. Someone else made a demand of me. I was returning the volley. Are you reading only my stuff? Have you heard of sarcasm?
tsam: you
And pup still doesn’t understand – STILL, that’s stunningly obtuse – that “thee” and “thou” was a useful method for showing bb why “you” had nothing to do with the correct word in that song lyric. BB got it, though, so I’m wondering whether there’s some selective reading going on here.
“Insulting” not in evidence.
Not familiar with Jennifer.
It’s been really weird to watch as Saul Alinsky has been promoted from “60s radical whose politics we don’t much like” to “OUR generation’s Emanuel Goldstein”.
Also, when you start arguing that a tax credit is paternalistic big government intervention, it’s clear that you’re not paying any attention to what you’re saying.
You know what’s been bugging me is the title of this post. That is just bad German.
bbkf, both you and vs will I’m sure have at least one comment show up on the calendar. Do not fear.
We need a reply thingamajig. That’s constructive not-even criticism.
Note to self: Do not let Smut around my trees.
Everyone likes to see my woodcuts.
Smut wants a good piece of ash.
Daphne: shouldn’t you be busy getting raped by Apollo and/or turning into a tree?
Also, are we going to have to get a wall-o-text copypasta troll in here so Cerb or Tintin or someone looks at this site and fixes the perma-italics?
NO. But thanks for your liberal sentiments.
reply thingamajig. Wanna call it criticism, go ahead.
When the language changes, it changes. If you want to insist that other things associated with the things that have changed have not changed you can go ahead. If you want to argue that usage is fixed, static, is only correct according to the outdated rules you learned in grade school you are free to do so. I only ask that you dont’ do it here because it’s dull. Because no one gives a shit what you think. Because you’re not contributing anything worthwhile. And besides, you’re a twatwaffle.
“Smut wants a good piece of ash.”
I go for the nut trees myself.
Hey, McLeod, get offa my ewe…
(Yes, I know I said I’d stop feeding it, but…)
You are seriously trying my patience, troll.
See, what I did there is what’s called “quoting” your post, so you can see it’s a reply directly to you. Not hard to do at all. If you aren’t a dumbfuck troll.
What the fuck was with that grammar? I mean I can barely tell it’s English. You have the audacity to complain about Cerb’s grammar… I just… gah! Trolls make no fucking sense whatsoever.
Why are we arguing about the words “try and”?
Here’s the Merriam-Webster Dictionary of English Usage entry on “try and”.
The executive summary:
-“Try and” is contemporary with, and may even predate, “try to”.
-It has been in use in writing for the last two centuries.
-While perfectly correct, it is considered informal.
Now, given that Cerberus’ articles have a lot of features that would be even less acceptable in formal writing than “try and” (e.g. crossed out words, “yup”, “um”, swear words) I don’t know why the phrase “try and” would particularly stand out.
Hah! Well played.
Imma try and deefend Daffney. Aw fergit it, she is a twatwaffle.
Troll value.
Pup: seriously. That’s the single densest response I’ve come across since, well, ever. You REALLY STILL don’t understand the difference between modern language and grammar? You REALLY don’t get what it took bb one comment to get – and graciously defer to my explanation? “Thee” and “thou,” see, were a demonstration of the fact that the word “you” – which replaced BOTH of them, subjective and objective, tells you NOTHING about whether it’s “for you and I” or “for you and me.” Because it’s YOU regardless! It used to be “thee” and “thou” and now it’s “you.” That’s one issue. Now here’s an entirely separate one:
It’s the “for” – a preposition, which takes “me,” the object of a preposition you lunkheaded slice of duh – which indicates which preposition follows. What you’re trying to do is the essence of conflation, speaking of trying my patience, and if you still don’t get it do try to summon within you the sense simply to admit you really are out of your depth.
That’s what I get for adding to someone’s “try and” in a music lyric the poetic license example by the Doors.
Meanwhile, Storm Front beckons some of the commenters here. Speaking of admissions, I admit I didn’t predict it becoming that vile.
A New Hampshire state representative sent the statehouse into chaos on Tuesday when he responded to what he regarded as an autocratic procedural maneuver on the part of the Speaker of the House by yelling out the Nazi salute, “Sieg Heil!”
Now he has apologized “for using two German words, which I understand has negative ramifications” and has promised, “I will never use a German word again.”
Scheisskopf!
Sorry, not which “preposition,” which “pronoun.” For you and me. Because for, not because you, Pup.
But why are we arguing about “you and I.” It has nothing to do with the subject.
Dance, badgers, dance!
Ahh, that’s better.
What’s an “opposite snot”?
What drips from your nose when you’re talking out of the other side of your face.
“But why are we arguing about “you and I.”
I’m not arguing, you are.
“It has nothing to do with the subject.”
daphne troll is beginning to see the light! Here’s hoping she turns to stone.
*Eliminationist rhetoric is rhetorical. No actual trolls were harmed in the making of this comment.
Wow, BBBB. That’s even nastier than the commenters here casually referring to rape.
Pup is beyond reason. Maybe bb or some trusted source will explain it. As it is, this one is more pathetic than the self-proclaimed trolls on the blogs I frequent whose raison d’etre is not to get anything.
Yeah, and most Storm Front users are all words too. And they never get censored by the administration.
Also too, regarding the other assclown troll who was advocating polygamy as a scare tactic against marriage equality, in polygammic marriages, the two or more women aren’t married to each other, each is married separately to the man. It’s a fundamentally unequal and patriarchic system commensurate with holding women as chattel property and has no relationship to our modern contractural view of marriage under the law. What does the law saying you can’t be legally married to more than one person at a time so we can keep the contractual rights and responsibilities of the parties clear have to do with morality?
bbkf, both you and vs will I’m sure have at least one comment show up on the calendar. Do not fear.
Is it a swimsuit calendar?
Why are we arguing about the words “try and”?
Here’s the Merriam-Webster Dictionary of English Usage entry on “try and”.
The executive summary:
-”Try and” is contemporary with, and may even predate, “try to”.
Submitted without comment… alternate version for those not trying to be hippies in the **SNERK** 70’s.
“…for you and I.” Jim Morrison
Robbie Krieger wrote that one.
Yeah, J. That would be the Touch Me Babe.
Wow, BBBB. That’s even nastier than the commenters here casually referring to rape.
Calling a GOP asshole who casually “Godwins” his colleagues a shithead? You really have no reading comprehension, and therefore, you will be consigned to the “Dancing Badgers” brigade.
Killfile engaged, badgers are go… or go-go as the case may be.
turning into a tree?
HAWT.
turning into a tree?
HAWT.
Check all cavities for bees, old chum.
No, BBBB, calling the Godwin creep worse than the rape threat. As in EVEN NASTIER, But thanks for the irony re: reading comprehension.
There, that’s so much better.
Tho’, to be sure, the lyrics are a series of sentence fragments…
Jokes about tree sex are always poplar with the crowds.
Trolls who want to try and argue about grammar are the kind of thing up with which I shall not put.
Jokes about tree sex are always poplar with the crowds.
You must be oaking.
Daffyne meant WOW in the non-sarcastic sense. In the literal sense, it makes her look an idiot, but I do thank her for removing any doubt on that score.
“Jokes about tree sex are always poplar with the crowds.”
Oh THAT old chestnut.
Based on your current occupation, I’m guessing it has something to do with water treatment.
Yep. That’s the 1M-gallon clear well. That’s the Finished Product, ready to fill commodes throughout La Vergne!
.
Not that I’m going to beech about it.
Trying to come up with an aldernate formulation.
If arrested, one finds oneself in the hickory-dickery dock.
Not that I’m going to beech about it.
Yeah, right, you do that alder time.
I shall forego subsituting “ginkgo” for “kinky” in the tree sex punorama.
With Malus aforethought.
No, I was not aspen for help, either.
oh good…i was pining for a good punning…
oh good…i was pining for a good punning…
And me without my punning shears.
All this talk about tree sex is giving me a boner.
I mean, “wood”.
I was trying to make a joke.
I’m not a dendrophile.
I’d better try and shut up before I make an ash of myself.
Smut, yew are such a pining hornbeam it makes one sycamore.
Please boys, no aldercations over tree sex.
DAMMIT bbkf pre-stole my pining joke! Fir will fly!
well thanks, no one, for saying something to the effect of “You know, I’m not going to defend her on anything else but she was right about the thee/thou for you conflation.”
And now I know why.
As for “try and,” I now know why Cerberus uses it. Oh, it’s conversational, all right, but it’s more a matter of the juvenile setting and catering to the crowd, the blogger definitely included. Have no idea what the average age is, but it does seem ironic that the rightwing bozos Cer so effectively shreds are no more the cretins than the commenters.
By all means, resume “trying and.” Oh, wait, even Cerberus gets that one correct for some reason. And thanks for making me even more grateful for the advantages of old age and for reinforcing the life lesson some of you may have learned, and proceed to spend the next 1000 comments speculating what it is.
POOP.
So to recap…
In the time I was gone, you managed to break the comment thread twice with bad italics html (eh, it’s wordpress). We saw what happens when a slippery slope troll has to deal with reality (they become stuck on their talking point like it was their fucking lifeline). Also my relatively harmless grammar troll transformed into some sort of moron wingnut “liberals are the real fascists” babbling crazy person with a persecution complex.
…
Well, fuck!
Um, so yeah, italics should be fixed. Off-topic moron looking for Pharyngula has been banned. I’m currently leaving his posts up though, though I might decide to erase them or disemvowel them later depending on my arbitrariness.
On daphne… um… I’m sorry for giving you the benefit of the doubt, I guess. I’m actually kind of sad to see that you’re just a run-of-the-mill troll.
And since there is nothing funnier than a single-issue troll who doesn’t understand their issue:
Dear C: then by all means continue to sound childish and unfamiliar with other languages, which I have on good authority that you’re not. Infinitives: they’re one word in the other Romance tongues.
“To try and” is not a split infinitive. It is at best a usage of a conjunction in place of a preposition. “To and try” would be a split infinitive. A split infinitive is splitting the “to (verb)” construction. It can only be caused by inserting a word between the “to” and “(verb)”, and only if the “to” is the first to. So, your snide comment reveals that you don’t actually understand what “not technically accurate” grammar rule you are defending or how it works.
And frankly as a writer, I find that shameful. Hey, being a grammar nazi or having that one “not technically a rule” grammar tic that drives us insane? Goes with the territory. I have my embarrassing triggers and I’m sure some of the commenters have theirs. But the difference between us and you is that we understand our triggers. What they are, why we think they should be used our way, and usually, why people using a different way are technically correct (though in a way that drives us insane).
I don’t know what you’re looking for daphne, but you are neither clever nor important and now you’re not even subtle.
And that’s not authoritarianism. That’s you being a moron who doesn’t understand what words mean.
Addendum to daphne-
Also, “rule of common usage”. It’s the fucker that gets all grammar nazis in the end, myself included (‘s should still go after a name ended in “s”, damnitt). You might want to look it up before you make yourself look even more like an idiot.
And at the risk of being repetitive, that’s not what juvenile means. Juvenile does not mean using conversational tones. Something does not become more academically rigorous or deeper simply by using an archaic genre of construction, nor does a higher vocabulary make one more intelligent (especially when one does not understand their own vocabulary).
It is much the same way that 90s comics did not become more “adult” simply by adding tits and gore and guys in black scowling over the barrels of guns.
It is aping the genre without understanding the reason for the genre. The arbitrary rules one learned in school without understanding why they were taught, and more importantly, when they should be broken.
If you’re going to pick grammar as your hill to die on, you need to read a fuck of a lot more about composition, cause right now… it’s just embarrassing for everyone.
On a different subject, I’m pretty sure the new flood of tired homophobe posts are from one of B Daniel Blart’s homophobic readers. So, congratulations, World’s Worst Homosexual, you are pretty much solely writing for professional homophobes at this point.
Too much tree sex will leave you saw.
And me without my punning shears.
Prunus!
That’s you being a moron who doesn’t understand what words mean.
NUH UH I DUZ TO! Your just another liebral poopyhaid hater.
I nos better spellings and grammerz then yu. And I use the rite stuffs for my thots.
Cerbs, I had the same idea about the homo troll. No, I did not mean “homophobe” troll.
Manipulative Sicko Monkeys.
Piggybacking on Substance’s link.
Address my post, libs!!!
Piggybacking on Substance’s link.
It’s just too easy.
Prunus!
Can i putamen in there brother!
Cer: I NEVER mentioned a SPLIT infinitive. I said “think infinitive.” As in “to” is the first word of an infinitive in English, while in other languages an infinitive is one word. You really didn’t understand. Think infinitive. As in you wouldn’t have an option of doing it the other way.
I never said “split.” Never. That’s your hill to die on.
What benefit?
Some writer. Reading comprehension – “Think infinitive, not split infinitive” or lack thereof – is the tip off.
The lesson? Our side is just as stupid as the other one. But the smarter ones do concede points. Think, not split.
*siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh*
– Think infinitive, not split infinitive – or lack therof…
So Bill O’Reilly’s quoted on my TV tonight, and he admonishes some poor schmo that “no one owes you anything. You have to work for it.”
Contrast that with, oh, several years ago: “Death tax.” “Death tax.” Inheritances must not be SPLIT from one penny of their entirety.
His side is a bunch of dumbfucks too dumb to experience cognitive dissonance. Sometimes so is ours.
Cer: go find it. It’s in several posts.” Think” infinitive. Really. Not “split.” Then proceed with your larger point.
daphne-
Sorry for trying to read your rambling nonsense in the most human way. You do realize that “think infinitive” a) doesn’t mean anything, b) has nothing to do with the issue that supposedly triggered this full meltdown, and c) was part one of a series of posts demonstrating multiple levels of failure to understand grammar, composition, or the evolution of english, right? And that said post was possibly the most jumbled aborted mess of a mass of sentences that has ever tried to pose as the last word on grammar?
Cause… don’t think you’re helping your case.
But for what it’s worth, I drop the split infinitive slam.
I’m still sad that you weren’t just an English nerd ribbing me over your pet grammar peeve (one which is an ingrained habit on my part and which I don’t think I’d be able to fix completely even if it actually was universally incorrect).
Shit, I’m arguing with a Janus Node, aren’t I?
Well, now I really do feel ashamed.
It’s all good fun until someone splits an infinitive.
I tried splitting an atom once.
Poor kids. They never stood a chance.
well thanks, no one, for saying something
Daphne will NOT BE IGNORED.
ah, Cer, you dug in. Surely even YOU realize that “think infinitive” is merely shorthand – conversation speak if you like – for “think in terms of an infinitive.” I mean even you. You had the chance to concede the point, claim it was not the heart of the issue, and go on from there.
But you dug in. And as we’re so fond of calling out on them, you moved the goal post. It went from “you said split” to “you said nothing.” Well, “think” is not “split,” whether it made sense to you or not. You’re not capable of that much of an admission..
Our side is just as stupid and stubborn and fragile of the ego as the other one. Thanks again for the confirmation. And thanks, at least, for not using “attempt to try,” or in your case “attempt and try.”
In retrospect, Daphne would have preferred being ignored. Can’t even get that right.
Um, so yeah, italics should be fixed.
They are, and thank you.
As for the dendrophilia side-thread… anyone ever read this? (I suspect it never got a US release.)
Can dendrophilia be combined with B & D? Withies!
no, bb. “For” is a preposition*. Would you EVER say “for I”?
Yes. Dumb troll is dumb.
*Politifact rates this “partly true.”
Your side may be just as stupid. My side is fucking brilliant.
My socio-political beliefs is red hot
Your socio-political beliefs aint doodle-squat.
It is much the same way that 90s comics did not become more “adult” simply by adding tits and gore and guys in black scowling over the barrels of guns.
Q.F.T.
My Judeo-Christian god is better than your Judeo-Christian god.
My Judeo-Christian god is better than yours.
My Judeo-Christian god is better ’cause he eats Kennel Ration.
My Judeo-Christian god is better than yours.
It says “Romans Go Home!”
Cerberus, you have the patience of a saint. I would have banninated Daphne many posts ago.
The unmedicated rambling and childish palooka posturing are starting to remind me of a truly disruptive, monomaniacal troll from another blog I frequent.
I dunno, I wouldn’t keep tolerating it. Daphne’s comments are not just hilariously ill informed. They’re also mean.
Cer: waiting. Can you apologize for being proved wrong? Even an “I’m sorry if…”? The rest of them – they’re noise.
Our side is stupid. I never said your.
My li’l red book brings all the youth to the yard
My li’l red book is better than yours
Whattaya mean OUR side bitch? You ain’t on my side.
I do not support the ban hammer re daphy. Disemvowelling, OTOH, would be perfect justice.
Jesus, DEMANDING attention be paid, an apology be given, whims be catered to, admissions of error be proffered, etc. Somebody has a lot of nerve accusing others of being “conformist authoritarians.”
Hey, McLeod, get offa my ewe…
I wanted Jimmy and the Boys, with the crazy Ignatius Jones and Joylene Hairmouth, but they just didnae have the clip I wanted. Curse you, EweTewb!
Your failure to bend to my whims makes you the real bullies!
Can yOu believe that idiot Faulkner got a Nobel fucking prize? All those grammatical errors EVERYWHERE in just about anything he wrote!
My mother is a fish.
He really should have had a better editor, like doophne, maybe. She wouldn’t of* let him get away wiff dat shit.
*just call me El Piscadore.
You should try it! I say ‘your’ all the time. It’s oodles of fun.
They learned me good english in skool.
Yes I did, yes I did
Somebody please tell Cerb who the eff I is
I am Daphne tha Dull, I smack your posts up
Smack loops up, and back the hell up
Damn you Snorg! I blame the martoonis for not being firts w/ that approach.
I have vodka, I have no gin. Martini yes/no?
Cerberus: noise above. Clan mentality.
Concede the point. I said “think.” You misread it and proceeded to spend a very long paragraph taking a very long tangent based on your unwarranted assumption.
A few years ago I was linked here by God remembers what blog. I said to my husband, “You know, this reads like a bunch of very, very smart, very, very clever college students.”
I was wrong. It reads like children. And the world’s most prodigious child still sounds like a child.
Anyone, between comments, hear Rachel’s utter evisceration of the FOX segment conflating a wsj journalist with the supposed “victim” vandersloot tonight? That was their side. We expect them to be stupid.
But only the stupid one assumes one’s entire side isn’t. The truth is that some are less stupid than others.
No fair swiping my shtick–again!
I’ll check on your verdict in the AM, Pupienus. I have some locally grown boo-berries which I’m thinking could make a good mix with
scotchvodka.How does one make a martini with vodka? UNPOSSIBLE! You might make a martini style cocktail, maybe even call it a “vodka martini” if you wish. But sorry, you can not make a “martini” using vodka.
Fucking Smirnoff. You know they paid Al Broccoli big bux to have James order that abomination, yes?
Not true. I am the world’s most prodigious child, and I sound like a buffalo fart.
Oh, I know. But vodka is so versatile that I always have it around. It’s not like I’m trying to sell it as a martini to someone else.
Ennyway, I think I will skip the drinking tonight. Need my beauty rest.
A buffalo fart is a lot of fart.
This thred has me pining for the old days of doing battle with The Brahms Gang et al. on Usenet. Now THAT was trolling done rite*!
*Heh.
Buffalo farts are rarely as spicy as one is led to believe.
It’s totally prodigious to the max.
I am impressed with this progression:
http://agonyin8fits.blogspot.com/2012/05/he-meant-to-do-that.html
http://agonyin8fits.blogspot.com/2012/05/reasoning-with-authoritarians.html
Not true. I am the world’s most prodigious child, and I sound like a buffalo fart.
PicsMP3 or GTFO.Lighting a buffalo fart would be really awesome.
Well, it would probably turn around and stomp you into jello – but it would be really awesome right up to that point.
But vodka is so versatile that I always have it around.
Is there ANYTHING it can’t do?
The necks of vodka bottles need to be juuuusssssst a tiny smidge wider.
No mere mortal recording format can ever capture the basso profondo grandeur of my flatus.
…Oh you can’t roller skate in a buffalo herd…
Fucking Smirnoff. You know they paid Al Broccoli big bux to have James order that abomination, yes?
I doubt that. It’s not like the vodka martini was never associated with Bond until the movies came along. There’s a passage in Casino Royale where Bond gives a bartender very specific instructions on making one.
Ah, James Lipton is sublime. Anyone catch him between posts? Now for more ridiculous:
“try and understand
try and understand
try, try, try and understand”
Speaking of benefit of doubt, I’ll give Cerberus one re: still not apologizing for the rather breathtaking mistake. Even the blog’s proprietor can’t be constantly online. Ultimately, though, I’m confident I’ll finally get it.
Now to resume the noise:
Troll definitely has the stench of Gay Patriot. I’ve been over there yanking chains all day.
I relate.
Actually it’s “try to understand”
ah, pretending not to get it. That’s much funnier than what I said.
And the link! Perfection.
But the Free Market has the Magic Hand, momma!
Try to lick my ass. G’won, G’head, TRY.
TRY and lick my bunghole. Hey you’re right! Not the same thing at all!
Concede the point. I said “think.” You misread it and proceeded to spend a very long paragraph taking a very long tangent based on your unwarranted assumption.
nope…at least in this post you did not say ‘think’ infinitive…you just said that in the other romance languages, infinitives were one word…
i have no idea why that was niggling me, but it was…
this is what you posted:
Dear C: then by all means continue to sound childish and unfamiliar with other languages, which I have on good authority that you’re not. Infinitives: they’re one word in the other Romance tongues.
at least in this thread…if you are talking about an exchange in a previous thread, then holy crap…every comment ever made certainly cannot be remembered at any given moment, can they?
also, that entire comment boggled me…
Cerberus: you coming back?
bb: split? where? You’ve un-deliberately made my case. The absence of “think” in that particular comment – I made at least two with the word – is not the presence of “split.”
But you did get the “thee” and “thou.” Maybe it’s just half a niggle.
daphne should write a “what if” scenario wherein the dangers of not facing and confronting (or whatever it was) colloquialisms! Why, it could lead to DISASTER for all right-speaking peoples EVUHWARE!
Did I say children? Babies speaking gibberish.
Think “thou” and “thee.” Just don’t split them – or use them in these modern times.
exchange in a previous thread, then holy crap…every comment ever made certainly cannot be remembered at any given moment, can they?
North Dallas Thirty, MY own little stalker, apparently maintains a file with links to everything I have ever written on teh intartronz. It (he?) also lambastes me for things I didn’t write so there is that. And such as.
bb: split? where? You’ve un-deliberately made my case. The absence of “think” in that particular comment – I made at least two with the word – is not the presence of “split.”
you are correct: the absence of ‘think’ is not the presence of ‘split’…but you DID NOT say THINK in that comment…which is the one cerb was citing when she got on the split infinitive…and yes, you DID use ‘think’ in two other comments AFTER all that…but you can’t dog cerb for something you added later…i believe that IS called ‘moving the goalposts’…
North Dallas Thirty, MY own little stalker, apparently maintains a file with links to everything I have ever written on teh intartronz. It (he?) also lambastes me for things I didn’t write so there is that. And such as.
yeah, i saw that…freaky…and maddening since yeah, he attributes a lot to you and jennifer that neither of you wrote…that dude ALWAYS has to be right about EVERYTHING…
Here you go: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbI-fDzUJXI
I never get my own internet stalker.
(sulks)
OMFG I had a poorly constructed non-sentence there. Will that entice doofny to stalk me as well? Nah, doofny is obsessed with the anonymous snark blogger Cerberus. I jus can’t imagine why. Really I can’t.
Please daphne, explain your obsession with the anonymous snark blogger Cerberus. Why are you entranced? What is it that leads you to pay SO MUCH attention to someone you have never met, know nothing about save for pseudonymous bloggerings? No rational person would behave so absurdly.
Fess up daftknee, it makes your naughty bits all tinglywise, don’t it?
I never get my own internet stalker.
i’m sure it can be arranged…well, my zucchini bread is out of the pans and cooling…and it’s been taste tested, so it’s off to bed…big day tomorrow what with having to fit ‘bag of tits,’ ‘holy fuckaroo’ and ‘tittyfucking’ into the conversation at my board meeting…then i’m off to see the daughter in a ‘miss midwest’ pageant…she’s pretty excited as am i…
daphne: still wasting oxygen instead of blessing us with it as a laurel tree.
Hey, JP, is that you at a Parliament concert…cuz why aren’t you dancing?
Yes/no/but I bought one of your artworks, tonight!
.
Eh…everyone does know, don’t they, that it is impossible to split the infinitive in English?
The infinitive is one word. “To swim,” “to dance,” “to be” … in each of those, “to” is a preposition. It is NOT a part of the infinitive. The whole “split infinitve” thing is another rule of Latin grammar grafted onto
English, which is not derived from Latin.
Working on new post, come back and hello…
I should just ignore the troll. I mean, this is troll 101, but…
Daphne used to be sane. I’m not saying this out of hope, but rather because I have the backlogs of every comment she has made at her IP address (hey, moderator powers, how are you).
And here we are with someone begging, gagging for a banning, demanding personal attention, and thinking the entire world revolves around her and her odd recent obsession with being achingly obviously wrong.
I have all her comments. As in all of them. She interestingly enough hadn’t used the word “think” at all in any of my posts until after her odd non-sequitur “pay attention to ME” rant. A rant which is painfully obviously her demanding something I gave to her in the comment she is ranting about (seriously slacking peeps, she gave you a slow pitch right over the plate).
But that’s sort of besides the point. I don’t want to punish her IP address if it’s just some asshole roommates hacking her account or an experiment in trolling (you people have strange hobbies), but I can’t really keep having a comment thread continually devolving into one person demanding constant unending attention to the detriment of everyone else’s enjoyment of Sadly, No! (I rely on all of you amusing yourselves while I’m writing my 5 gazillion page epics).
So I’ve decided to just state my current position and let the chips fall where they may.
Major Kong-
What about when Dennis stole your nym?
…that dude ALWAYS has to be right about EVERYTHING…
Which is funny, because he’s NEVER right. Partly because instead of picking his argument he just makes shit up to throw against the wall, and is invariably, inevitably wrong every fucking time he opens his gob.
What about when Dennis stole your nym?
I did have a stalker! I feel much better now.
MY own little stalker, apparently maintains a file with links to everything I have ever written on teh intartronz.
Damn file must be well into the megabytes by now.
The necks of vodka bottles need to be juuuusssssst a tiny smidge wider.
Ahem.
BTW, Pup, I shut his stupid trap on the whole “full faith & credit wouldn’t apply to marriage!” bullshit (not that he’d ever admit it) by asking him, “ok, well then, why was DOMA passed in the first place?”
Crickets….crickets…
Oh wow OMG I just killed daphne.
I refuse to rub POOP in my hair. Please, continue, though.
.
I said “think” in other comments, bb. Cer misread it as “split.” Without the “think” there would have been no word to misread. “Think infinitive.” “Split infinitive.” Where did the misunderstanding come from? I’m not going to retrieve it. Cer can retrieve it, seeing that she bothered to research me from the beginning. I said “think” infinitive. That’s why it’s “to.”
Oh, Cer. Just admit it. You used to be sane. Well, maybe not. Well, maybe I used to happen to write comments that happened to conform to the community consensus, if that’s what “sane” is, being as liberal as anyone here. But clever. Clever like a child prodigy, though not terribly adept at discerning motives it’s now become clear. And now, just wrong. Emily Latella wrong. But unlike her, you are constitutionally incapable of conceding the point. Liberals: just as ego-protecting as the cons.
And pup continues to issue orders. And Jennifer’s wrong. The “to” is implied in one-word infinitives in other languages of Latin ancestry. In English, for some reason (we’re across the pond?) it’s two. You split an infinitive, not a word. Which I never accused anyone of doing.
Roommates!
And S, if you’re still around, not going to let me get away with that “try and understand,” are you, Cenk of Young Turks on the magazine cover: So Obama’s the first gay president. And Clinton was the first black one. No, they’re not. But some people are going to read that headline and think it means Obama is gay.
Try, try, try and understand.
Roommate! That would explain the “split” personality.
God in heaven. You guys are young.
Is that poor woman still without proper medical supervision? I can spare one of my royal physicians–I believe the cure involves ostrich egg shells, honey, the urine of a pregnant woman, and crocodile dung. He swears that the wandering find their wits within hours of the suppository’s insertion.
Roommate! You mean like in a college dorm?
You used to be SANE? That’s what THEY do.
No, dipshit, YOU are wrong. “To” is a prepositional marker. It’s used because the form “TO be” is the closest translation we can get for “etre” in French, for example. In the Romance languages, the infinitives are one word (exactly as they are in English! except they don’t have the prepositional marker). Hence it is IMPOSSIBLE to “split the infinitive” in any Latin language, because you’d be cutting one word in half.
You want to argue on the “correctness” of the split infinitive “rule”? Take it up with the OED. They say there’s no such thing as a “split” infinitive in English. Now, go ahead and tell us how some feckless internet troll is THE authority on correct English grammar and usage, over and above the OED.
OMG! NO ONE IS LISTENING TO ME!
[badger, badger]
I WILL KEEP SPOUTING! YOU CAN’T STOP ME!
[badger, badger]
HAVE I MENTIONED MY POOP?
[badger, badger]
.
Next you’ll be telling us that “referendum” means “legislative ratification,” “endorsment” means “crediting a source” and “bigot” means “someone who makes you look like an idiot on the internet.”
yes, dipshit. You can’t split a non-English, one-word infinitive. Which is exactly what I said. Which is what you repeated because you didn’t understand it’s exactly what I said.
You can split an English infinitive because it’s two words, the first one being “to” which is why I told Cerberus, whose headquarters are in Germany thus presumably knows some German, to think infinitives, as in other, one-word-infinitive languages . Which is exactly, PRECISELY, what I said. So go ahead and pretend it wasn’t clear that I said exactly what you proceeded to say. dipshit.
Oh, did I say that I never mentioned “split” until Cerberus did? dipshit who made the same point that I already had.
Freedom?
Is Yang holy word! You shall not speak it!
.
Can’t say I didn’t warn her.
daphne is officially in timeout.
No, dumb fuck, “to” is NOT part of the infinitive. It is, as I’ve said twice now, a PREPOSITIONAL MARKER. NOT a part of the verb. Which is why it’s impossible to “split” the infinitive.
Take it up with the OED.
Youse gotta oil your infinitives properly, or they’ll split. Fucking newbies
And now one of the Putzriots is threatening to “out” me. Whatever shall I do?
Is there anyone who comments at Dan’s sad little blog who’s actually gay and not a homophobe? They love throwing around anti-gay slurs over there.
We have to conform to the Community Consensus. If you dare to deviate, the Sadly overlords fly Smut in from New Zealand, and the next thing you know he’s leaping out of a dark alley, cracking the back of your skull with a lead sap.
Is there anyone who comments at Dan’s sad little blog who’s actually gay and not a homophobe?
Yes. And no. There are some who are ACTUALLY gay but they too are homophobes. Auntie BruceDan just lurvs him some virulent gayophobic nutmeisters. There’s no other reason for the place than to have a space for abuse.
I shall cue up some Brahms and hit the sack.
Trolls and badgers
Trolls and badgers
See how they dance
Trolls and badgers
Trolls and badgers
Hope they don’t infest your pants
Also, daphne does not get literary references.
I wuz gonna say..to find commenters as lame as Gay Putzriot’s, you usually have to go to youtube. Seriously, ask a question they can’t answer and the anti-gay slurs (and others) start flying. They seem to think this is a winning strategy, because obviously it takes a very large brain to throw out a four-letter insult.
daphne should revise her trolling routine and at least troll on an interesting topic.
What I was talkin about…
Yes Jennifer, I still find it hard to believe that someone would waste their time in such an improvident manner. Yapping on about splicing the mainbrace or whutever it was when there are poop jokes to make.
“Think infinitive” has no meaning except in the context that Daffyne was attempting to correct Cerb for the non-existent sin of splitting an infinitive. What other context or meaning could there be for her objecting to the “try and” construction versus the “try to” construction? She lost her shit over separating the verb following “try” from its critically necessary “to”. That is she lost her shit over SPLITTING the two apart even if she didn’t use the word “split”.
What the hell just happened here?
We were supposed to be talking about Michelle Malkin’s perpetual sneer and her penchant for kicking old ladies in wheelchairs down flights of stairs. Where did I get sidetracked?
At least the sex with trees bits were normal Sadly comments!
New post!
Damn, I was going to make a joke about that piece of classic dendrophile / S&M pornography, “Venus in Furze”.
The infinitive is one word. “To swim,” “to dance,” “to be” … in each of those, “to” is a preposition. It is NOT a part of the infinitive. The whole “split infinitve” thing is another rule of Latin grammar grafted onto
English, which is not derived from Latin.
Not so fast, Jennifer. In English I can infix intensifiers. To perfuckingfect this sentence, I fixed an adjective after the prefix. Pretty sure advertisers and such have stuck adverbs in there as well.
Our grammar derives from the same family as German, which has separable and inseparable verbs. In separable verbs, the prefix is a preposition which can float around the sentence, ex aufsteigen–Stieg bitte auf. The equivalent structure in English is ripe for intensifying–get out, and get the fuck out. Or just an object: get your stank ass out [of here].
But there’s no law that says I can’t stick intensifiers in a verb with a latin prefix, as I did above. I guess all those other Romance languages (note: English is not a Romance language. nice try, though, Dafney) are just … limited.
Oh, Cer. Just admit it. You used to be sane. Well, maybe not. Well, maybe I used to happen to write comments that happened to conform to the community consensus, if that’s what “sane” is, being as liberal as anyone here. But clever. Clever like a child prodigy, though not terribly adept at discerning motives it’s now become clear. And now, just wrong. Emily Latella wrong. But unlike her, you are constitutionally incapable of conceding the point. Liberals: just as ego-protecting as the cons.
I’m sorry, this just screams “off my meds/new meds/missed my bp medication today and got in a fight with my boss/child/dmv clerk and now cranky and acting crazy and no blood sugar is winding its way into my fevered brain at this point, no sirree”.
Daphne, if that is really you, GET HELP.
And pup continues to issue orders.
AttenTION!
And Jennifer’s wrong. The “to” is implied in one-word infinitives in other languages of Latin ancestry.
No, no it’s not. If I were you, I’d be embarrassed to hold forth repeatedly on topics I know nothing about. That bit about 6th grade says it all. Why don’t you read a grown up’s book on English grammar and get back to us?
Roommate! You mean like in a college dorm?
You’re right. Sounds more like a young teenager. Maybe a younger relative?
I embarrassed the heck out of my Grams years ago by trolling a Star Trek forum with her Prodigy account when I was 13.
WhWhat the hell just happened here?at the hell just happened here?
As much as I hate to say it of so many fine people, but Daphne punked those who I thought were unpunkable, and walked off with a stable full of goats in the process.
It was a masterwork in trolling dander was up, hair flying…
…
Litella.
no, bb. “For” is a preposition*. Would you EVER say “for I”?
For I and for I!
Before I got bored and turned on the Killfile, I gathered that Daphne’s fixation on infinitives was not whether or not they could be split, but whether they function as nouns. The idea seemed to be that since
try
is a transitive verb, it must be paired with something nominal in nature… a gerund, perhaps (“try exercising”) or an infinitive. The flaw in the argument is thattry
does not have to be transitive and can be followed, equally acceptably, by another verb.Bored now.
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