Tintin Goes To Tampa Bay
Eugene Delgaudio, a Republican official in Virginia’s Loudon County, best known for claiming that gay TSA agents were getting their jollies patting down male passengers’ junk, is sending out a letter to his constituents claiming that radical homosexual pirates have invaded Tampa Bay, Florida, and are roaming the streets. My bags are packed and I’m hopping the first flight to Tampa with my copy of “How To Talk Like A Pirate” safely tucked under my arm. What fun! I am particularly looking forward to some of the novel uses one might make of a parrot during a gay encounter with a pirate.
January 29th is the 106th annual Gasparilla Pirate Fest in Tampa Bay, Florida. By all accounts it is quite some event, opening with a real live pirate ship docking at port, and literally hundreds of people in pirate costumes “invade” the city in groups called “krewes” The event is a full two weeks of seemingly family oriented events
When I think of family-oriented events, real live pirates are pretty much the first things that pop into my mind. Nothing brings a family together like kidnapping, robbery on the high seas, plank-walking, rum-drinking, some fitful sodomy, and, of course, the occasional lash.
But in recent years Radical Homosexuals have been intent on turning it into a two week alcohol fueled display of public debauchery. Organizers started by purposefully making the parade route zig-zag so no one could call it a “straight parade.”
A little known fact about me is that I used to be more heterosexual than Charlie Sheen on coke in the Plaza Hotel until that fateful summer when I did a zig-zag parade route and wound up in the arms of a well-endowed and insatiable bullfighter before the parade was even close to finished. Once you’ve done the bolero with a torero you want no more-o the senora, as they say, more or less, in Seville.
Word is that Radical Homosexuals have infiltrated as event organizers to promote homosexual events that are designed to prey upon unsuspecting college students by enticing them to join their “krewes” and help build parade floats in exchange for free alcohol. When the young men are sufficiently intoxicated, homosexuals dressed as pirates whisk them away to God knows where to take advantage of them sexually.
Now, I was buying into the whole gay pirate invasion story right until this last bit. I have more than a little experience in the art of gay seduction and I can testify that plying some guy with free booze, even with a little float building thrown in for good measure, is not going to lead a perfectly straight college kid to consent to being whisked off for a little game of hide-the-sausage with a pirate or anyone else. The only person who might give credence to this notion is someone who has limped home after a late night session of buggery and tried to blame it on the Captain Morgan’s. We’re looking at you, Eugene
There are even countless stories of any number of immoral sex act being performed by open homosexuals – some even in broad daylight during the event.
Apparently, sex acts performed by non-open homosexuals are a-okay, which, of course, conveniently gives a pass to those thousands of closeted gay Republican politicians. We’re looking at you, Eugene.
As long as the Radical Homosexuals run free in our streets, they will continue to spread their debauchery and corrupt our culture.
Now would be the time for me to work in a butt pirate joke, but I’m just not coming up with one here.
RRRRRRRRRRRRR Mary
I can’t think of any butt pirate jokes either.
FTW.
It’ll come to me.
Hah! come. There it is.
When I think of family-oriented events, real live pirates are pretty much the first things that pop into my mind. Nothing brings a family together like kidnapping, robbery on the high seas, plank-walking, rum-drinking, some fitful sodomy, and, of course, the occasional lash.
ARRRRRRRR I like the cut of your jib.*. ARRRRRRRRR
Hell yes it is.
The whole Republican party is a seething cauldron of repressed homosexuality.
Men men men men there’s nobody here but men…
a man performing oral sex on a Jack Sparrow look alike
Look-alike?
Because straight people would NEVER get horrifically drunk and preform debauchery in Florida….
Organizers started by purposefully making the parade route zig-zag so no one could call it a “straight parade.”
Uh, that could be the and a bottle of rum provision…
One mother complained her three year old had witnessed a man performing oral sex on a Jack Sparrow look alike in her front yard.
Ah, “Talk Like a Pirate with a Cock in Your Mouth” day…
I had multiple episodes of lulz reading this.
One thing that I found very shocking, however, was that the Radical Homosexuals were turning this pirate party into some sort of display that was alcohol-fueled. That really is going too far – I’m sure not a drop was imbibed previous to the RH takeover.
Jimmy Buffett- Somalia- Buttsecks!!!
First they came for the prates, and I did not speak out because I could not speak like a pirate…
plying some guy with free booze, even with a little float building thrown in for good measure, is not going to lead a perfectly straight college kid to consent to being whisked off for a little game of hide-the-sausage with a pirate or anyone else.
This belongs here.
You know, there’s a “pegleg” joke in here somewhere.
A little help!
Maybe I can just pull that “pegleg” joke out of my ass.
they will continue to spread their debauchery
That’s not the only thing they’ll spread, if you know what I mean. And I think you do.
“Whisk them away to god knows where”
Never never land I guess
Great find Tintin
Pegleg? I hardly know Leg! Yours was better.
“You know, there’s a “pegleg” joke in here somewhere.”
The PEGleg is in Eugene’s fundament, I believe.
As long as the Radical Homosexuals run free in our streets, they will continue to spread their debauchery and corrupt our culture.
Someone is desperately hoping to be tied up and shat on.
“You know, there’s a “pegleg” joke in here somewhere.”
You’re on shaky footing there.
Pegging isn’t my specialty. You’ll have to ask my girlfriend.
“As long as the Radical Homosexuals run free in our streets, they will continue to spread their debauchery and corrupt our culture.”
OK…not seeing a downside. As far as I’m concerned most towns could use a big dose of dick-in-the-ass.
You know, there’s a “pegleg” joke in here somewhere.
That’s a matter of a pinion
If the look alike really really looked like Johnny D I would totally smoke that pole. I’m just saying.
Hey, the beads they’re handing out are bigger than the ones they hand out on Mardi Gras!
That’s a matter of a pinion
Wood you please avoid the puns? Thank yew.
So – is he wanting to see Radical Homosexuals run in chains through the streets??? because – hawt! (to him , anyway).
You’re on shaky footing there.
A limp joke to be sure.
I’m giving you all astern warning about nautical puns.
You’re on shaky footing there.
actually, he doesn’t have a leg to stand on.
I’m giving you all astern warning about nautical puns.
I always do as I’m mast.
“Hey, the beads they’re handing out are bigger than the ones they hand out on Mardi Gras!”.
Oh help me. Are they loops or simple strings of beads?
Arrrrrrrgh
“So – is he wanting to see Radical Homosexuals run in chains through the streets?”
He hasn’t got a clew.
Limpness is an obstacle to jolly rogering.
The event is a full two weeks of seemingly family oriented events
Family friendly, it’s ARRR rated
Couldn’t help myself.
What do you call an openly gay pirate?
Lackbeard
Limpness is an obstacle to jolly rogering.
I had a good luff over that one.
Gasparilla is all about the upper-crust of Tampa society – the ‘Krewes’ – making the most of the opportunity to let their freak flag fly under the guise of a ‘parade’.
“Wood you please avoid the puns?”
It was a fluke.
The capitalization of Radical Homosexuals suggests that it’s one of the krewes, or perhaps a local soccer team, or a hair salon, something meriting a proper name. Maybe it’s one of the pirate ships showing up.
seemingly family oriented events
I’m tolerant of most orientations, but that’s one I’ve nev’ ahoyed of.
I thole you so. Also POOP (deck).
Limpness is an obstacle to jolly rogering.
I had a good luff over that one.
You missed an ‘f’.
If that three-year-old knows what oral sex, I’d say he’s halfway there already.
If that three-year-old knows what oral sex is
I blame Clinton.
Also, w/o leaving the boat, I’m going to guess all of this Euge’s flap-doodle is based on one gay outfit getting one float in this bacchanal.
So, what’s the over-under on the number of ‘batin breaks Eugene took while writing this?
So, what’s the over-under on the number of ‘batin breaks Eugene took while writing this?
He was being fellated by a Smee look-alike while typing it.
“If that three-year-old knows what oral sex, I’d say he’s halfway there already.”
If that three year old knows about oral sex he’s probably Catholic. And just the right height to be there already.
True story: I thought oral sex had something to do with phones until I was…too old for this story not to be embarrassing.
True story 2: I once called a salon and requested a blow job…as opposed to a “blow out”.
Yes, I know ive told that one before.
Yes, no puns from the pirate canon!!
I would not be rating for them.
The pirate ship Radical Homosexual, flying the Skull and Crossed Bones…
Wheeeee!
Because straight people would NEVER get horrifically drunk and preform debauchery in Florida….
Y’know what Tampa’s most well-known feature is to the travelling businesfolk of America.
Strip clubs. Hundreds and hundreds of strip clubs.
Apparently no one told Eugene that all those pirates came ashore from <A HREF = "http://www.google.com/#sclient=psy&hl=en&rlz=1R2GGLL_en&q=miles+cowperthwaite&rlz=1R2GGLL_en&aq=0&aqi=g3g-m1g-o1&aql=&oq=miles+cowper&pbx=1&fp=517884ad4e853a0b"The Raging Queen, a ship full of manly men, following the manly pursuit of sailing the high seas, calling on exotic ports o’ call such as…Key West, San Francisco, and the Greek Isles…
And closet-boydio still has to compete with Batshit Krazy Shelley B hiding behind bushes photographing MN Pride when she was a state senatrix…
Goddamn it.
Apparently no one told Eugene that all those pirates came ashore from The Raging Queen, a ship full of manly men, following the manly pursuit of sailing the high seas, calling on exotic ports o’call such as…Key West, San Francisco, and the Greek Isles…
“Strip clubs. Hundreds and hundreds of strip clubs”
That’s wholesome family-oriented entertainment.
Holy ship! Eugene’s “Inqusiton” website is choc full o looniness me bucko! He has a rant up called “Be Ye Transformed”, WHICH DOES NOT HAVE OPTIMUS PRIME IN IT, that reckons we should all dress in the biblical manner and not ask our Pastors about it since they are all “worldly” too.
Burqa wearing is just wrong though
vs,
Family is what you make of it. If you wish to consider your coworkers and a flannel wearing man named Estrogen with a suspicious bulge on his left side and a seemingly inexhaustable well of hot-n-cold running hookers to be family, who am I to judge.
C’est la poisson!
Eugene should also avoid Tampa in July, because that’s when they celebrate Gaybor Days in historic downtown Ybor. If Tampa gets any more gay they’ll be having Gay Tamping Days come fall!
I’d say he’s halfway there already.
Who, Eugene?
I’d say he’s been there a while.
“Be Ye Transformed”,
This was simply a moar popular name than Optimus Prime in the glory ages of America, when the most popular boy’s name would be something along the lines of “He-Shalt-Be-Toasted-On-Racks-Of-Hot-Nails-Shouldst-He-Spilt-His-Man-Gravey-Inappropriately”.
Course I am not gonna check out that mango, smells from here, and there are black crawly things on it.
Seaman Staines, time for a sounding.
As dogs are my witness, I had no idea of the S&M connotations of this term until this moment, my original intent was to make a joke about “plumbing the depths”.
I need a better plumber. All my hookers run cold.
Seaman Staines, is that rooster ready for me to put bread and herbs inside it yet?
If Tampa gets any more gay they’ll be having Gay Tamping Days come fall!
Arr, they be tamping som’thin, mate. Be on guard for belaying pins and ramrods aft!
I spent several years of my youth living in Tampa Bay, more than 30 years ago, and it had a pretty large gay community even then.
I am reminded of the traditional pirate song about paying the teenage cabin boy for acts of sodomy in the hard-of-hearing first mate’s quarters by plying him with Hostess brand snack cakes, and if that didn’t work, stuffing his colon full of nickels. The entire lyric escapes me, but I remember the refrain:
“Fifteen, men, on a deaf man’s chest;
Yo: Ho-Hos and a rattle of bum.”
I believe this is accurate.
Gay Tampon Days seems…unlikely. Unless you’re referring to Lilith Fair.
Mine too. It’s the freezer.
Using teh Google, I find that all instances of the phrase “forty fathoms of phallus” on the internet were typed by moi.
I can’t have been the only person to have read this!
If it be Cap’n Hooker ye be lookin’ for. Take the stairs out the back, yaaaaaaaaaaaaar
All my hookers run cold.
All your hookers are belong to us!
If Tampa gets any more gay they’ll be having Gay Tamping Days come fall!
Heh heh… Tamp ya.
Daily life aboard The Raging Queen:
“I find that all instances of the phrase “forty fathoms of phallus” on the internet were typed by moi.”
Nothing to Crowe about
Jennifer FTW, I believe. Have a free internet.
ur doin it rong
Let’s not forget the classics:
Sunset and evening star,
And one clear call for me!
And may there be no moaning of the bar,
When I put out to sea,
But such a tide as moving seems asleep,
Too full for sound and foam,
When that which drew from out the boundless deep
Turns again home.
Twilight and evening bell,
And after that the dark!
And may there be no sadness of farewell,
When I embark;
For tho’ from out our bourne of Time and Place
The flood may bear me far,
I hope to see my Pilot face to face
When I have crossed the bar.
Fuck me straight up the drainpipe, Charlie
I’ll grip the pretzel jar
Ride me like a rumbling Harley
When I have cruised the bar.
Cruising the Bar
-Alfred Lord Tennyson
Hope this guy never comes to New Orleans. We’ve got people here who dress as pirates 365 days a year. There’s even a group of “vampire pirates”. Undoubtedly, more than few are gay as a treefull of monkeys on helium.
On further thought, I hope this guy never comes to New Orleans anyway. We’re full up on asshole as it is. And though I view Mardi Gras with approaching dread ’cause I’ll have to cook for all those bastards, I do like seeing the drunken revelry. I like seeing people have fun, even if said fun results in projectile vomiting and streets ankle-deep in plastic cups, beer bottles and Mardi Gras beads. Invariably, though, there will be that group of folks who stand right about St. Ann and Bourbon – what’s called “The Rainbow Line” – with signs that say Jesus hates everyone who isn’t a straight, white, conservative Christian male.
I always want to ask them if they’ve ever had someone stop and say, “You know, you’re right. I’m going to stop having fun right this instant and be a humorless, miserable asshole.” Also, the only boobies I ever see on Bourbon – not that I’m looking, mind – is generally some drunken young woman flashing these assholes, who’re desperately trying not to drool. It’s pretty funny.
Matt, I like the cut of your jib. You know how to spin a good yarn.
Good Lord, Spengler. We must have learnt the bowdlerised version when I was at Sunday School. I do like the reference to the pretzel jar.
vs,
I come from a long line of people who are completely full of bullshit.
“I come from a long line of people who are completely full of bullshit.”
I think if youre a good storyteller from the South you kinda have to be.
Matt, that right there is PEOTRY. Maybe not Tennyson, but demned fine, sir, demned fine.
Midshipman Hornblower! Another one of these.
Kiss me Hardy!
“Midshipman Hornblower!”
Ooooh, Ioan Gruffudd!
*wipes drool from chin*
YES, DROOL I WISH it was a VR.
Obvious nymfail.
And here I was, thinking that “Ioan Gruffudd” was an onomatopoetic sound-effect.
Obvious veiled reference.
a suspicious bulge on his left side
Gun or colostomy bag?
BTW…to whomever Zap Rowsdowered the last thread…you’ve made me a very a happy woman. I appreciate your sacrifice. I hope its the final one.
It was Loan Grufford who shot Kennedy, when the gay pirates forced him to. So DKW’s mum says.
How do pirates stay fit? Arrrrgh, jim lad!
Gun or colostomy bag?
Worst game show EVER!
It was Loan Grufford who shot Kennedy, when the gay pirates forced him to. So DKW’s mum says.
I heard that he killed Kennedy in the conservatory with a candlestick.
Hey, what was that movie about Joan Grufford? You know, “No wire hangers” and all that?
I do like the reference to the pretzel jar.
Wait, wait, which one am I supposed to open, the pickle jar or the pretzel jar?
Wait, wait, which one am I supposed to open, the pickle jar or the pretzel jar?
Whichever one is on the bottom shelf.
homosexuals dressed as pirates whisk them away to God knows where to take advantage of them sexually.
Dear Mr Delgaudio,
Those were actually CIA in deep cover, they prefer the term ‘rendition’ to ‘whisking away’, and ‘God knows where’ is actually Bagram Air Base.
Hope this helps.
Pirate Lolita reprise
~
Honestly I’m shocked it was a woman
*claps like an excited toddler* Lurve it!
HELLO!
Honestly I’m shocked it was a woman
He should have stuck to vampire movies.
Zap Rowsdower was in the previous thread? CANADIAN SUPERHERO!!!
I had no idea Saruman was such a hit with the ladeez.
“I come from a long line of people who are completely full of bullshit.”
I come from a long line of people who call it blarney, and I join the others in congratulating you on your skill with it.
Can’t resist another….
So then professor, what’s another word for pirate treasure?
I say booty!
Helmet tip to Pharcyde…unless my memory of ’90s hip-hop has failed me
From a previous wish fulfillment fantasy mailer, in which Mr. Delgaudio attempts to slip a VPR past the assholes that make up his constituency:
I think if youre a good storyteller from the South you kinda have to be.
My grandfather always told us that he had lost his arm and leg in the army when an alligator attacked his company as they practiced maneuvers in the Georgia swamps. I did not quite believe this, but I did suspect that he may be CAPTAIN HOOK!
There’s even a group of “vampire pirates”.
Do they sparkle?
My grampa always told me that my bellybutton was “where the Yankee shot ya.”
Speaking of navels…
Speaking of navels…
And grampas, for that matter. But vs already beat you to it (I’d hate to see her cry again).
Just before he threatens the faithful about throats being crammed full of meaty goodness, Eugene warns
Yes, folks he’s just hit you up for $100 each. You don’t need Johnny Rotten to tell you that you’ve been cheated.
Also “weak-kneed” Throats crammed. You join the dots.
> BTW…to whomever Zap Rowsdowered the last thread…you’ve made me a very a happy woman. I appreciate your sacrifice. I hope its the final one.
Awwww, just one more sacrifice?
“Next week, see them battle Acadian Werewolves on Cape Breton! That’s on ‘Zap and Troy, The Legendary Journeys’!”
As a Cape Bretoner who grew up in Troy … I damn near choked to death on my beer.
-K
Let’s see. What should we title this image…
How about Midnight Cowboy?
Hm… how come alt and target attributes don’t work on anchor tags here? Someone last thread was able to put alt text on a link.
Hm. Howddedoodat?
sub told me to use bbcode extra for that i think
I swear to god, one of these days I’ll get in an actual comment about the actual fucking post before yall are on to rye puns and suchlike.
Or maybe not…I just move too slow these days.
“As long as the Radical Homosexuals run free in our streets, they will continue to spread their debauchery and corrupt our culture.”
Here’s what I wanna know: what exactly does this asshole think is the OPTION here? How exactly does he propose to stop those miserable RHs, huh? I want to hear the creative method he’s invented for preventing existing people from taking part in – oops, corrupting – our miserable culture.
Running free in our streets…instead of in our jails or cemeteries, I guess. I dunno, maybe he hasn’t really thought this through, or maybe he’s a murderous bastard, hard to tell.
use title = “” instead,
<a href = “http://penis.org” title = “Beat THIS DK-W”>
,,,until that fateful summer when I did a zig-zag parade route and wound up in the arms of a well-endowed and insatiable bullfighter before the parade was even close to finished. Once you’ve done the bolero with a torero you want no more-o the senora, as they say, more or less, in Seville.
I love you Tintin. Uh, totes heterosexually, of course. Love. You.
I love you too, Tintin. Sexually.
Oh, Tintin –
Sexually.
@UKBristolDave–I think it’s the Beastie Boys you’re thinking of. Now I’m going to have Professor Booty running through my brain for the next 24 hours. It’s possible that they stole the sample from the Pharcyde, but I’m pretty sure that Paul’s Boutique predated any Pharcyde album.
Back to the topic at hand though, if I weren’t already happily married with kids I’d have to at least pretend to turn gay just to attend all the fabulous parties that fabulous people seem to have *and* to piss off the humorless penis-wrinkles like Eugene.
So then professor, what’s another word for pirate treasure?
I say booty!
Helmet tip to Pharcyde…unless my memory of ’90s hip-hop has failed me
Beasties.
Dammit!
(But it was Check Your Head, not Paul’s Boutique.)
/trivia
Once you’ve done the bolero with a torero you want no more-o the senora, as they say, more or less, in Seville.
Once you’ve had penis, you’ll never want Venus.
(Substitute Jesus for the closet-case Xtians.)
I dunno, maybe he hasn’t really thought this through, or maybe he’s a murderous bastard, hard to tell.
I’m betting on murderous bastard.
@Zap Rowsdower–argggh! Damn iPod/iPhone ruined my knowledge of albums to the point that I make stupid mistakes like that. In that case it could be possible that the sample came from a Pharcyde song, but I doubt it. I blame the Radical Homosexual Agenda, especially since “shuffle” is probably code for some depraved act!
I dunno, maybe he hasn’t really thought this through, or maybe he’s a murderous bastard, hard to tell.
These are not mutually exclusive.
“Awwww, just one more sacrifice?”
Zap any man who can make me laugh that much can sacrifice all night long. BTW, does your funny-talking woods friend have throat polyps?
I blame the Radical Homosexual Agenda, especially since “shuffle” is probably code for some depraved act!
I completely understand. The Radical Homosexual Agenda sometimes makes me forget to get my allergy shots.
“shuffle” is probably code for some depraved act!
You have no idea
BTW, does your funny-talking woods friend have throat polyps?
No. After realizing he peaked with Moonraker he hit the sauce pretty hard and it corroded his pipes.
Is it me or is it nigh impossible to tell the rantings of homophobic loons from the plot synopses for gay pornos?
Is it me or is it nigh impossible to tell the rantings of homophobic loons from the plot synopses for gay pornos?</i.
Where else would they get their material?
what gay porno has a plot that would need a synopsis?
“I completely understand. The Radical Homosexual Agenda sometimes makes me forget to get my allergy shots.”
Now I feel better about blaming homos for my sinus infection.
tag fail AND missing the second sentence. *sigh* You can fill it in for me.*
*VBR
No, no, no. We’re not supposed to stop roaming the streets. If we’re all locked up or dead SmellGaudio can’t use us to scare the people who give him cash to tell them how scared they should be of RHs roaming the street.
“February 10, 2011 at 4:09
what gay porno has a plot that would need a synopsis?”
The kind that John Williams does the soundtrack for! It’s called ART, pedestrian.
> Is it me or is it nigh impossible to tell the rantings of homophobic loons from the plot synopses for gay pornos?
They see the gay porn and then, having no other experience to relate to, use that to spin their self-punishing rants ….
-K
I can’t answer this question without sounding (among other things) REALLY OLD. So suffice it to say, get offa my lawn.
Whatever you do, do not think about butt pirates.
Teh gays made Eugene cry.
Surprisingly this from another fundraising epic.
– Captain Smollett, Captain Smollett!
– Not now Young Jim!
– But Captain Smollett!
– I have already told you not to disturb me when I am busy with Squire Trelawny.
– Butt pirates!
– That’s quite enough Mister Hawkins. Trelawny and I are not engaged in buggery, this is very important naval work we are doing right now. With our pants off.
Psst. Don’t tell him about Mardi Gras! He’ll blow a gasket.
The Mahdi Gras? Are we talking about Muqtada al-Sadr? He’s just big-boned.
OT but hilarious
Shorter Delgaydio:
We must crush this popular event enjoyed by the overwhelming majority in order to please a small group of people who want nothing to do with Gasparilla! For Freedom! And Democracy! And maybe Whiskey but definitely no Sexy!
Whiskey and sexy go hand in…hand.
“I come from a long line of people who are completely full of bullshit.”
I come from a long line of people who call it blarney
I come from a long line of dead people.
Psst. Don’t tell him about Mardi Gras! He’ll blow a gasket.
Oh he’ll blow something all right.
I come, therefore I am.
“What are you so afraid of, Sam? They aren’t interested in you, get it.”
“I ain’t afraid. I just don’t like ’em.”
“That doesn’t make any sense. You don’t even know who “they” are.”
“Oh, I know who they are, allright, you can always tell them.”
“How’s that, Sam, how can you always tell them?”
“Well, for one thing, they talk funny. And they walk funny too.”
“It sounds like you’re talking about ducks, Sam.”
“Bullshit. I always know which ones is, you know, funny.”
“Oh really? OK. Are there any in here right now, right now in this place?”
“Damn right there are. They’re everywhere. Every fuckin where.”
“Point one out to me then.”
Sam looks around, hesitating a moment on a target across the room.
“There’s one, right over there, wearing a yellow blazer.”
“You’re sure, you’re sure he’s funny?”
“Goddamnit, I said he’s one so he’s one.”
“Sam, that’s Tommy Lasorda.”
“Who?”
“Tommy Lasorda. Manager of the Dodgers. You know, they were in town for a three game series. We swept them.”
“No shit?”
“Yeah, no shit.”
“I’m gonna ask him for his autograph.”
“Better not, Sam.”
“Why the fuck not?”
“Well, you know, ’cause he might have some weird shit on his hand, especially his writing hand, and then you’ll catch it, ’cause, you know, they carry shit.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“Fuck it. I don’t care. That’s goddamn Tommy Lasorda. I don’t care if he’s funny or not. I’ll be real careful not to touch him.”
“What if he want’s to shake your hand?”
“I’ll tell him it’s broke.”
“Oh, that’l work: Hello Mr Lasorda, my hand is broke, but can I have your autograph?”
“He probably ain’t really a queer. I could be wrong. I mean, he’s Tommy Lasorda, shit.”
OT but hilarious
I thought that story was toogoodtobetrue, but here’s a PDF of the original.
I thought that story was toogoodtobetrue, but here’s a PDF of the original.
Nevertheless, the pigocalypse is coming.
Yarr, I be shocked – shocked – t’foind that thar be drinkin’ in this pirate parrrrrade!
Also, enough pornography should keep th’ men from resortin’ ta homoseckshuality. Fer about foive minnits, arrr.
You guys are on fucking FIRE tonight. I mean, just *flaming*.
But the cowaplypse is cancelled
hell I may be moving back to Tampa!!!!
Wahingtonians: Be afraid. Be very afraid. The Donalde walks among you:
a href = “http://penis.org” title = “Beat THIS DK-W”
Ok, PupiMaxi, let’s try that:
Popeye and the Butt Pirates
Next question: what does WP recognize in place of < and > ?
ex pat, thirty years ago the fabulous hung out* in Treasure Island** bars. I’d hang out there cuz they’d let the underage me and my girl drink — as long as we brought weed.
*VPR
**VPR
(you straighten ’em out*)
Isn’t Eugene “Gasparilla” Delgaudio a contestant on RuPaul’s Drag Race?
The prewar Popeye was the best.
“Dear Penthouse Forum: One stormy night I drove to a mailshop hidden deep in a nearly deserted stand of warehouses. I’d heard something was up and wanted to see for myself…”
Ahrrr, sure wish I’d stumbled hereabouts several hours ago, when many ripe piratical fruitquips were hangin’ plump for the pickin’.
Hot bath now, mateys.
POOP!deck Pappy.
& # 60 ;
and
& # 62 ;
if I’m not mistaken.
< here goes nuttin >
without the spaces, obviously.
And more POOP.
I left two comments at the end of the last thread.
I had/have one more–a longish apologia–that WP has now refused seven times.
Maybe it doesn’t feel that you need to apologize for anything.
Thanks John. But I think I do….
I was pretty well stunned by the comment.
I wanted to address everyone and put time and thought into writing it. I hope that WP relents and allows me to post it in the last thread. I don’t want to disturb this one.
(Which has been a blast to read, btw.)
Word is that Radical Homosexuals have infiltrated as event organizers to promote homosexual events
Word? What, Word On the Street? Huggy Bear told him?
You guys! I got my first troll! He even had the civility to write “feminist c*nts” instead of “feminist cunts”!
Now I know that if my readership starts to decline, I just need to write ABORTIONABORTIONABORTIONABORTIONABORTION and they will come like a zombie for branes. (With apologies to zrm–there is no comparison, I know).
V, I went back and read the entire thread and I concur with WP. It’s best to just let it drop; you don’t need to apologize. If he was talking about the ‘your mom’ thing, that is.
If not, then YHBT.
And, as for aunts, I have an artificially hawt aunt in Seattle into S&M, B&D, B&B, D&D, R&B, C&W, whatever… She goes to Tijuana every other year to get her hawt reimplanted. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if I downloaded a B&D vid and discovered her in it.
She’s 53. Interested?
Damn. I was right.
HAND.
Never mind, got confused by context and a lack of caffeine.
Also, Poop.
The fact that EVERYONE comes here is both a blessing and a curse.
Needless to say I will be avoiding all public restrooms until the last of these fucks slithers back into his or her respective hole.
Bahahahaha! Christ, the Wrong is strong in that one.
EVERYONE comes here
VBR.
DC is like a whorehose.
HOUSE. WhoreHOUSE.
Dammit.
<gulps coffee>
< facepalm >
She’s 53. Interested?
Perhaps she has a newsletter or website to which I can subscribe. Lemme try it on for size.
Hey, last night I totes took yout aunt’s new Tijuana titties for a test drive and I have to say that the suspension is a little bit stiff.
Word is that Radical Homosexuals have infiltrated as event organizers to promote homosexual events
Like that one time that I infiltrated a wedding and before anyone knew what was happening it was a GAY WEDDING.
In your defense, whorehose sounds pretty hawt.
You guys! I got my first troll!
Commence aerial spraying. (On her blog, VS uses Ariel spraying.)
Wahingtonians: Be afraid. Be very afraid. The Donalde walks among you:
Last year, I celebrated the far right convention next door by staying indoors and watching a slew of anti-Nazi movies (Inglorious Basterds, Valkyrie, The Last Crusade and an episode of Foyle’s War where the bad guys are a Mosleyite party inside the U.K).
Thinking of doing the same thing this time around. Any suggestions? (Inglorious Basterds would be hard to top, me admits…)
whorehose
As a kid, I was always confused by the juxtaposition of Black Canary’s girl-next-door persona and the fact that she’s walking around in the middle of winter wearing fishnets and a bathing suit.
Chris – try The Blues Brothers.
“Illinois Nazis. I hate Illinois Nazis.”
In your defense, whorehose sounds pretty hawt.
For you, DKW, I recommend Bangkok.
Needless to say I will be avoiding all public restrooms until the last of these fucks slithers back into his or her respective hole.
Last time they came by (for the GlennBeckathon on the mall), the DCist website reported a story about a few of them making a scene in a CVS or similar store about how high the prices were, and how he was sure they were being scammed because they were Wholesome Small-Town Folksy People. The manager eventually talked to them and confirmed to them that no, prices are just higher in DC, that’s what everyone pays, no really, nobody’s out to get you, you can relax.
Injured Teabagger: “Well, that’s un-American.”
Manager: “No, sir, that’s capitalism.”
Chris – try The Blues Brothers.
Ohhh, I love that one. Saw it about the same time last year, too. Maybe I’ll watch it again.
I have an artificially hawt aunt in Seattle
Do not put your aunt in the microwave
Sure, you all laugh but here are some pictures of last years event.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_lSk4AbYU4tY/S1xASTKYwII/AAAAAAAABXo/R1SvPJjHqR0/s1600-h/ZapComix03-4-b03.jpg
Any suggestions?
You could play some sort of WWII themed shoot-em-up videogame.
Say, what’s this?
Damnit, you just got the Blues Brothers stuck in my head. If only I had the movie soundtrack with me!
Wait, what’s this? I do? Oh, happy day!
Hey folks, here’s a story ’bout Minnie the Moocher,
She was a low down hoochie coocher.
She was the roughtest toughest frail,
But Minnie had a heart as big as a whale
Hi dee hi dee hi dee hi…
And didn’t Helen Slater fight Nazis in Supergirl? I could be imagining it.
I’d watch Helen Slater in a miniskirt again, nazis or no.
Also, Popeye.
It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets whorehosed again!
We used to cover Soul Man in my jazz band in HS. I wanted She Caught the Katy but the trumpet section was the conductor’s pet. TBBM is one of my top five movies of all time. It’s comfort food for the soul.
Rapier, we want the rest of that story!
Also, Chris: Almost every Indiana Jones movie. But I only like the first one, really.
http://www.henrymakow.com/confirmedrockefeller_plan_to_g.html
http://www.almartinraw.com/subscription/column191.html
http://www.henrymakow.com/homo_international_controls_ea.html
http://www.abidingtruth.com/pfrc/books/pinkswastika/index.php
Teenage Anti-Nazi Pirates
Bear down Boys!
heh
I don’t understand what the Little Mermaid has to do with this…
The capitalization of Radical Homosexuals suggests that it’s one of the krewes, or perhaps a local soccer team, or a hair salon, something meriting a proper name. Maybe it’s one of the pirate ships showing up.
way way way behind time… but it would make a great football (soccer) team name… but who would they play:
Olberman Cup, 5th Round
Obanista Statists 3 Radical Homosexuals 0
Euro Abortionists 0 Communist Furries 1
Global Warming Leftists 2 Alinskyist Black Panthers 1
Sharia Marxists v Fascist Socialists, match postponed…
Chris,
Check out “Went The Day Well?” which is a low-budget WWII conspiracy thriller, made during the war, to remind Britons to trust nobody. I’d recommend others but I forgot the criteria. And now I can’t find your post upthread.
I don’t understand what the Little Mermaid has to do with this…
Ariel
Post-Apocalyptic Unicorns would be a good band name.
Post-Apocalyptic Unicorns would be a good band name.
True. Unfortunately, an awkward book.
True. Unfortunately, an awkward book.
it would be a better book if it were about the band.
Or maybe a children’s book: Sparkles, the Post-Apocalyptic Unicorn
Sparkles, the Radioactive Post-Apocalyptic Unicorn
It would be a fantastic book just for the joy of making small children try to read “Apocalyptic” out loud.
Some geek fellow was always first.
Some geek fellow was always first.
A little known fact: Eve beat Adam to the apple because he was playing with his iPad.
IOW, an Apple in the hand is worth two on the tree.
Any suggestions? (Inglorious Basterds would be hard to top, me admits…)
See if you can find “It Happened Here”. It’s a British film from the 1960s that depicts a hypothetical England under Nazi occupation.
Gaahh! stupid co workers. If you didn’t want two different sales totals, why did you ask for the same numbers twice? Or, If my totals were supposed to match some report, why didn’t you tell me that before you asked me to run the query instead of 10 days after, when I have run a couple dozen queries in the meantime and forgotten anything about your problems?
Gaaah! stupid job…i have not been able to get on here to check ANYTHING out…dang…i hope you are all having fun…but then again, now that i have broken the seal (so to speak) i will probably be back again and again and again…
I’d recommend others but I forgot the criteria. And now I can’t find your post upthread.
Oh, just movies with Nazi villains. “The ODESSA File,” which I just found on Hulu, was the only one on my list as of this morning along with probably one of the Indy movies, since I own the trilogy.
“It Happened Here” I’ve heard of, but never seen, that sounds like a good one. “Went the Day Well,” I’d never heard of, so thanks for the heads-up. (And of course the Blues Brothers Movie is worth checking out at any time).
See if you can find “It Happened Here”. It’s a British film from the 1960s that depicts a hypothetical England under Nazi occupation.
Whatever you do, don’t get Fatherland, the 1994 made-for-TV film with the same basic premise. Absolute laziest piece-of-shit revisionist history until Jo-bag came along.
If anyone wants to compose Sarah Palin: The Opera, the libretto has already been written.
Whatever you do, don’t get Fatherland, the 1994 made-for-TV film with the same basic premise.
The scenes with the Department of Fatherland Security weren’t bad.
Hi.
I guess it will come as a shock to 0 people that I love “The Little Mermaid.”
More from Sarah
Doesn’t she know this is what we have Fox News for? Duh!
a shock to 0 people
0?
%^D !
%===> O !!
The percent sign is quite versatile. Testicles and/or my eyes.
My last post, from top to bottom:
VS
Me.
D-KW’s mother and an unnamed bystander.
“the libretto has already been written.”
I think the music has already been written, as well:
Chris, one can never see “The Third Man” too many times. It’s about bad Europeans, really but I bet they were Nazis also.
“Dozens of men began moving toward me. I’d been recognized. ”
He must have had his pants down… maybe he was taking a leak.
What does the second mean?
I know this has been done before. Including by me. Still,
We want to be able to trust those who are screaming for democracy there in Egypt, that it is a true sincere desire for freedoms.
Yes, I’m sure every one of these protestors is really a cunningly disguised mole seeking oppression rather than freedom.
More to the point, who the fuck asked you? You “want to be able to trust”? How the fuck is your trust even relevant? This isn’t your country or your government. A lot more people throughout the world are concerned with the Tea Party Movement in the U.S. than they are with demonstrations in Egypt, yet none of these people are arrogant enough to assert that they somehow have a say, or should, in U.S. elections.
And once again, interesting how those rugged individualists who think “everyone for himself” is the definition of freedom somehow think they should get a say in how every human being who’s not part of their in-group should run their lives.
I think that Del boy was writing about his fave gay porn fantasy but, you know, his audience? So he just put in “Then I ran away. Send money”
As long as the Radical Homosexuals run free in our streets, they will continue to spread their debauchery and corrupt our culture.
Eugene longs for the days when it’s safe for Mainstream Homosexuals to run free in our streets.
I think the music has already been written, as well:
That does have the right mix of pathos and comedy.
the libretto has already been written.
I was thinking libratto would be more appropriate, but it still has lib in there so maybe bratto would work.
I think the music has already been written, as well:
This should be in there somewhere.
Check out this Fox focus group of Iowa Republicans
Wow, are they dumb. Even Frank Luntz sounds a little concerned at times.
“Then I ran away. Send money”
Rent boys don’t (heh heh) come cheap.
Can I request a mulligan?
Need a boy to lift your luggage?
Bleg about some homo-thuggage!
Check out this Fox focus group of Iowa Republicans
HAH!! A group of Fox News watchers are complaining that the President is misinformed. That may be the funniest thig I’ve heard all week.
HAH!! A group of Fox News watchers are complaining that the President is misinformed. That may be the funniest thing I’ve heard all week.
I love the woman who complains that he gives “textbook answers”. What does that even mean? Too factual?
A funny Thig
I only watched a few minutes of a Fox News clip and now I’m having touble speling corrrectly.
A funny Thig
I assumed nasal congestion.
“I only watched a few minutes of a Fox News clip and now I’m having touble speling corrrectly.”
This is what Fox does to people.
This should be in there somewhere.
The Republican Primary. Also.
I love the woman who complains that he gives “textbook answers”. What does that even mean? Too factual?
She’s trying to say he’s just reciting something he read in a textbook and has no experience of himself (which is basically what she herself does if you substitute “Glenn Beck on television” for “textbook.”)
Which reminds me. If anyone’s curious, irony died sometime during my junior year of college, when my fundie former roommate declared Darwinists to be idiots because they just blindly followed what was written down in some old book. (Actual almost verbatim quote).
or perhaps
This is what Fox does to people.
Yes, it seems that I am no longer able to give textbook answers.
Also, where do you even find a textbook on dealing with Egyptian revolutions?
And how do you manage to give a textbook answer with O’Rielly interupting you at every fifth word?
Chris, that’s precious! Bless his fundie heart.
Oh Juses. From my inbox today:
You keep it classy, Human Events.
This is what Fox does to people.
This is your brain on Fox!
Here’s what $arah would say she wants for her theme music: “Oh, fer sure somethin’ by an American, Bach or Beethoven or maybe that Amadeus fella.”
The Republican Primary. Also.
Great, now I am picturing Sarah, Michelle Bachmann and Christine O’Donnell chasing Mitt Romney on speeded up film. John Mcain plays the silly old guy.
Who hurt you, sir? Who hurt you?!
Another funny thig.
Who hurt you, sir? Who hurt you?!
Ah, yes. That’s the loathsome “MRA.”
Hopefully they won’t follow you back to your lair. They are creepazoids.
When the news about “a Congressman resigned after he sent a topless picture of himself to someone who contacted from Craigs’-List” broke, I figured the Congresscritter was a Democrat (turned out to be a GOoPer, though). Why?
Because sending a partially nekked picture of yourself is way too tame for a real GOoPer. Reading things like Eugene Delgaudio’s paranoid screed about “open homosexuals” always makes a person figure that GOoPers have, shall we say, far more interesting fantasy lives than we Dems do.
Yes, I’m sure every one of these protestors is really a cunningly disguised mole seeking oppression rather than freedom.Yes, I’m sure every one of these protestors is really a cunningly disguised mole seeking oppression rather than freedom.
I wonder if the right is ok with Suleiman taking over – or is he just pretending to be the former torture czar and the handpicked choice of the U.S., Israel, and Mubarak?
Also your brain on Fox.
Plus, as I said upthread, I’m SHOCKED he was sending it to woman.
Who hurt you, sir? Who hurt you?!
I fully support this movement and I hope he convinces millions to join him in his boycott!
That’ll leave more for me.
I wonder if the right is ok with Suleiman taking over
The right has no idea what they’re OK with. Their role right now is limited to figuring out how they can credit Bush, blame Obama, or both. And, probably for a few of the movement’s policy wonks and analysts, thanking God it’s not their party up there having to make the decisions.
Sadly, a Suleiman takeover probably would be welcomed by most Western governments, and by the Egyptian military too.
Who hurt you, sir? Who hurt you?!
SarahPiper Palin won’t return his calls.Who hurt you, sir? Who hurt you?!
Not enough people!
That’s got to be a Poe… the prose makes Pastor Swank’s screeds read like Graham Greene.
American women are constantly in chemicals. Chewing bubble gum constantly (aspartame, which causes temporary retardation). The makeup. They are always doing diet things for extra doses of aspartame.
Huh?
They use too much birth control and it’s fucking up their vagina
Whoa, their vagina? Does he think that, much like the three Graeae shared one eye and one tooth, that the millions of American women share one vagina? I mean, WuhThuhFuh?
millions of American women share one vagina
I learn something new every time I come to S,N!
Obama is speaking on Mubarak stepping down now: http://www.youtube.com/aljazeeraenglish?feature=ticker
I read the first page of the site expecting to angry…but it was so fucking DUMB the only thing I could muster up was amusement.
Fucking up the vagina is WRONG WRONG WRONG.
Fucking up the vagina is WRONG WRONG WRONG.
Fucking up on the down stroke.
They use too much birth control and it’s fucking up their vagina
Actually, the shocking thing is that the author uses the correct forms of it’s and (though the verb/pronoun agreement is verkackte) their.
This leads me to believe that this particular entry might be a Poe, like Christwire.
Fucking up the vagina is WRONG WRONG WRONG.
What are you? Some kind of Radical Homosexual?
Who hurt you, sir? Who hurt you?!
B**4 just beat me to the comment I was about to make: that site has to be a parody. (Doesn’t it?) At least it reads like one, which of course is no guarantee…
I never knew that Starbucks was a residence.
Sorry, my comment was:
How can any man compete with the TRENTA?
FY
WPpremature release.I want to know what “women are always in chemicals” means.
You don’t have your own Starbucks? Poor, deprived BBBB
American women are constantly in chemicals. Chewing bubble gum constantly (aspartame, which causes temporary retardation). The makeup. They are always doing diet things for extra doses of aspartame.
It reads kinda like Chriswell… “the incidents, the places…”
It means they’re all drugged-out zombies, is what it means.(According to the headline.)
I may need to meet one of these woman-type persons.
like Christwire.
Speaking of Christwire.
I want to know what “women are always in chemicals” means.
He doesn’t believe your dewy freshness is natural.
“He doesn’t believe your dewy freshness is natural.”
That bastard!
He doesn’t believe your dewy freshness is natural.
He doesn’t believe that your fresh dewiness is natural, either.
Gotta jet, genti belli, gonna do some eagle watching before hitting a job site.
Have fun, B^4.
Uh, genta belle.
Ciao!
btw, this site was trolling Pandagon, so they may or may not be a parody site.
I want to know what “women are always in chemicals” means.
It is called the PERIODic table.
It is called the PERIODic table.
So…models are Unobtainium?
If these stupid American bitch feminists want equal rights, they should also go to the front lines and risk their lives. But no, they’d rather just send the men out to die for their “equal rights” while they sit at home in Starbucks, and cheating on their boyfriends who are over there fighting.
I’m sure that’s why they fought for the right to hold combat positions in the military, and I’m sure all the people who resist the idea are secretly feminist moles.
Oddly enough, the women who believe it’s their man’s place to go die for them while they get to stay at home tend to be conservative housewives. The same kind of women often make it virtually impossible for their husbands to hang out with female Army buddies once they get home. But yeah, feminist bitches, if you’d just join the military then they’d totally respect you. Or something.
I want to know what “women are always in chemicals” means.
To be fair, the only women that he’s ever had any experience with are in formaldehyde.
I have that exact shirt.
in recent years Radical Homosexuals have been intent on turning it into a two week alcohol fueled display of public debauchery
Thanks, Radical Homosexuals!
“So…models are Unobtainium”
It’s my marriage that makes me unobtainable, not my great beauty. *
*I am, of course, kidding
Hahahahahahah. He has posts by Andrew, Tony, Anthony, Gary, Bob, Bobby, Buddy, Patrick, Tom, Jim, Sam, Brad, and Steve. All write, in suspiciously similar styles, that despite their absurdly good looks, love with and American woman is impossible. Then there is this guy:
What, he couldn’t think of a single stereotypically black name?
“To be fair, the only women that he’s ever had any experience with are in formaldehyde.”
I was picturing women dipping themselves in great vats of chemicals that glow an eerie green.
We must crush this popular event enjoyed by the overwhelming majority in order to please a small group of people who want nothing to do with Gasparilla! For Freedom! And Democracy! And maybe Whiskey but definitely no Sexy!
Y’know, that did occur to me. Where’s this big-government Virginia asshole get off trying to tell us Floridians what we can or can not do with our Radical Homosexual Pirate gang-bangs?
STATE’S RIGHTS, MOTHERFUCKER.
He has posts by Andrew, Tony, Anthony, Gary, Bob, Bobby, Buddy, Patrick, Tom, Jim, Sam, Brad, and Steve.
That’s a lot of manly posting.*
*Yeah, right.
So…models are Unobtainium?
Apparently for those gentlemen every make is, too.
Im sick of American women acting like they are the center of the universe an aint no man gonna say anything to them about anything.
I’m sympathetic to the extreme with this point of view. I feel the same way about far too many Americans, usually white American men who vote Republican and don’t “think” so much as “take it on faith” that they are the center of the universe.
“Steve”
Gay.
“Steve”
Gay.
Dirk.
Lance.
Chet.
Big Jim Slade.
Lo Hung.
Enormous Genitals.
This is my first mate, Jack Hoff; he has the nicest smile I ever came across.
“Enormous Genitals.”
Worst. Porn name. Ever.
women are always in chemicals
I opened my breakfast packet of chemicals but there was NO WOMAN INSIDE. I have been cheated.
Worst. Porn name. Ever.
The Boob Tube and Kentucky Fried Movie figured large* in my sexual development.
*You know it.
Damn! Can I still be hetero if I go by Stephen? Or my middle name, Ross? Or do I need to come up with a good nickname.
“I opened my breakfast packet of chemicals but there was NO WOMAN INSIDE. I have been cheated.”
I laughed.
Someone get smut a packet-sized woman STAT.
TAKE the chemicals.
Or my middle name, Ross?
Stephen is even gayer. Ross is transgender. Have you been marching in zigzag parades?
Oh, and if “Thread Bear” is your idea is a heterosexual nickname, you may as well start practicing with a cucumber. I’m speaking as a friend.
Considering the amount of erotic dreams I have about Stephen Colbert, I’d say yes.
Considering the amount of erotic dreams I have about Stephen Colbert, I’d say yes.
What sex are you?
The kind that has cooties.
Oh, and if “Thread Bear” is your idea is a heterosexual nickname, you may as well start practicing with a cucumber. I’m speaking as a friend.
Lokks like I may need a nym change. So many choices! But which to choose?
You mean The Groove Tube?
Mm hm.
Have you been marching in zigzag parades?
I have only marched in one parade, it was actually quite square. I do sometimes march in a zigzag on my way home from the pub though.
I opened my breakfast packet of chemicals but there was NO WOMAN INSIDE. I have been cheated.
Good Lord, you didn’t eat her before she was reconstituted did you?
The kind that has cooties.
HEY EVERYBODY! VS HAS COOKIES!
You mean The Groove Tube?
Yes. Thanks.
Everyone click on Thread Bear’s link. *wipes tears of laughter*
Good choices, indeed. Ironically, all extremely gay.
“Dirk Hardchest”
“Slam Squatthurst”
“Smoke Manmuscle”
I rest my case.
Rip Steakface!
No! Smoke Manmuscle.
Wait! Big McLargehuge!
Oh, they’re all so good.
omg, she’s gonna reconstitute inside smut!!! Growing and growing inside his insidey parts! Weird!
Good Lord, you didn’t eat her before she was reconstituted did you?
American women are always sooooooo picky. “Eat me after I’m reconstituted , not before.” Sheeeesh. Maybe I will join the boycott!
I do not, but I do have muffins and ice cream. Well, one muffin and I ate half of it.*
Veiled…oh, you finish it
My middle name isn’t really ‘Whitney,’ it’s ‘Peterpan,’ and I didn’t really write a zombie book. I write Star Trek slash fic. Original series only.
My friend Bill was in the Navy
And he sailed the briny seas
Got so it would turn him on
To see the other boys pee
One night towards the bilge
Down to the bottom of the ship
Bill took over and spread my legs
And put his stuff in there, I say
It ain’t safe
it ain’t safe to get laid
I’m movin’ to Colorado
‘Cause only faggots get aids
They’ll get you when you ain’t lookin’
‘Cause they know where you eat
They go in there before you do
And spread their deadly seed
It ain’t safe
it ain’t safe to get laid
Goin’ to Colorado
‘Cause only faggots get aids
Old Billy’s dead
My wife is too
They got my little sons
Red and Blue
And they’re coming after you next my friends
I’m here to deliver the true Root message
The true Root facts
And these are three
One of which is important; only faggots get aids
You may think I’m joking
You may think this thing is not true
But none of these things are real
None of these things can be said to you
Only those who know, know
And those who don’t, don’t
So I’m telling you strait
This is only meant for you
I have a message from beyond
From over where the skies are blue
It ain’t safe
it ain’t safe to get laid
I’m movin’ to Colorado
‘Cause only faggots get aids
They’ll spread you
With their poison mayonaise
Run for your life
‘Cause only faggots get aids
Kind of makes you think.
BTW, Mubarak is apparently going to make a speech and step down tonight.
Gristle McThornbody.
What do you call an openly gay pirate?
I know! “Slack-reared”!
omg, she’s gonna reconstitute inside smut!!! Growing and growing inside his insidey parts! Weird!
I hear it will make his boobs look FABULOUS, though.
Sheeeesh. Maybe I will join the boycott!
Well, I WAS going to say I thought “Thread Bear” was a cute nym but now HARRUMPH.
Black people! We gots ’em! We SWEAR!
BTW, Mubarak is apparently going to make a speech and step down tonight.
I know, I’ve been glued to Al-Jazeera!
From VS’s link: “What the Left will never understand about the Tea Party”
“Why do you get more press than much larger groups?” No, I know the answer to that. Hmmm, oh I know: “How do you lot not drown in the rain?”
Are Hoverounds as fun as they look?
Black people! We gots ‘em! We SWEAR!
Wow! The Tea Party Review. And only seven bucks, such a deal.
Let’s see:
Obviously get the poor physician off of Obamacare before he meets the death panel.
Must be the pictorial
Ummmm, 3725?
I’ll take war for 2000, Alex.
Pretty much everything.
I just saved you all seven bucks.
Lulz.
Between this and the Beck/Kristol dust up, We’re more than halfway to half a dozen accurate and honest statements coming out of conservatives this week.
Will wonders never cease.
Good Lord, you didn’t eat her before she was reconstituted did you?
B**4 just beat me to the comment I was about to make: that site has to be a parody.
I don’t think it is. I’ve seen a lot of similar shit on the web.
The thing is, a lot of these guys are fairly educated, middle-class dudes who are all pissy because their wives refuse to be their servants and sex slaves. And/or they are fucking losers who can’t get dates and don’t want to face the fact that the problem is them.
I mean, I can dig up some men’s rights/anti-“misandry” shit if you want, guys, but I’m not sure you do…
And/or they are fucking losers who can’t get dates and don’t want to face the fact that the problem is them.
Someone needs to post this over at their website.
I actually spent a couple of hours reading this one a few weeks ago.
What the Left will never understand about the Tea Party
This “how little you understand the power of the Tea Party!” thing is the rage with these guys.
Here’s a thought; when threatened by a delusional sociopath or a group of such people, “understanding” said sociopaths would be a very low priority for the average person compared with, say, self-preservation. They’re right that I don’t fully understand their motives, or their deluded perception of their place in the world. I also don’t fully understand the biological mechanics behind cancer, but I realize that having it isn’t good for you.
Black people! We gots ‘em! We SWEAR!
2010
2006
1992
1984
&cet.
In keeping with the nautical homosexuality theme, a continuation of the tale of Miles Cowperthwaite and his adventures aboard The Raging Queen:
Timothy Toy the cabin boy
Was a permiscuous nipper
Shoved shards of glass up his ass
And circumcised the skipper
Since I’m 22 hours and 350 comments late, I’ll assume that all the good mizzenmast, keelhaul and buckled swish jokes have been taken.
The thing is, a lot of these guys are fairly educated, middle-class dudes who are all pissy because their wives refuse to be their servants and sex slaves.
I just keep divorcing them until i find one…
Damn! Can I still be hetero if I go by Stephen? Or my middle name, Ross? Or do I need to come up with a good nickname.
Max Power is taken, however.
Um, stay away from Rod’s and Lance’s. They used to work, not so much anymore.
There was a NatLamp bit on a Britt Ekland book entitled “My Life with Peter, Dick and Rod”.
The gay pirates have the patch over their left eye or is it the other way around? I can never keep that straight.
Um, stay away from Rod’s and Lance’s. They used to work, not so much anymore.
Ahhh, Lance. Leo & Lance is still my favorite pr0n flik ever. Even better than (one of) his other great pairing with Leo, Blonds Do it Best.
Wow protesters are waving their shoes at Mubarak. What is he, George Bush?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
February 10, 2011 at 21:40
B**4 just beat me to the comment I was about to make: that site has to be a parody.
I don’t think it is. I’ve seen a lot of similar shit on the web.
Well, if it is for real (which I stil hope it isn’t), then you’re right, I don’t want to see any more stuff like it.
Heh. I remember it as Tommy Loy.
I don’t think keeping it straight is the intention.
Mubarak basically just said, “Fuck you, I’m not going anywhere” People are furious.
Um, stay away from Rod’s and Lance’s. They used to work, not so much anymore.
Speak for yourself, sir.
Nazi movies for Chris:
Hey, thanks you guys for the condolences. It meant a lot.
What, I’m not sure.
Anyway, I was asked over there if it’s too soon.
OF course, it’s too soon! DK-W paid for a double with the corpse! Do you know how hard it is to get twice scale these days? Wait your turns, dammit!
They used to work, not so much anymore.
Speak for yourself, sir.
Sadly, I was.
*siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh*
“What the Left will never understand about the Tea Party”
Maybe they could hold a press conference for the “liberal” media, and for those of us on the left, and we could ask questions.
“Why did you drop the name Teabaggers?”
“The little string…does that stay outside the cup or do you have to wrap it around his handle?”
“What do you do with the wet bag when you’ve finished dipping?”
“Why are you guys such sheeple?”
Not exactly anti-Nazi, but the documentary The Eye of Vichy is really interesting and available to stream from Netflix.
The pirates’s boners are turgid and throbbing
They’re needing a fuck or a decent blowjobbing
But nary a woman is there to be had
So they’ll have to make do with your slut of a dad.
OT, but while wandering around the intertubes I discovered that the Get Smart complete series is availlable at Amazon for $86.99. Which I thought was very clever pricing till I noticed that if you scroll down on this page you can buy the complete series seperately for only $66.97.
First of all, great poem. I laughed, I cried, I threw up in my mouth a little.
“turgid”
I wish this word were used more often.
I want to sing and dance, I want to sing and dance
I want to be a pirate in the Pirates of Penzance
Wear me silver-buckled slippers and me tight shiny pants
I want to sing and dance
(waiting for the inevitable *Ahem*ming)
Nazis in fillum? “Army of Shadows”.
It might help give a clue to those wolverine-shouting shitweasels who fancy themselves as brave Resistance fighters against the evil occupying forces of the usurping Obama regime. Possibly not.
Welcome back, actor. Hope you’re doing ok.
Ooh ooh Penzance! Posted before but this is relevant.
Thanks, vs. I’m OK. My mom, no so much.
You don’t know Jack
the woman who complains that he gives “textbook answers”. What does that even mean? Too factual?
Perhaps he is using non-Texas textbooks.
Chris, I’m not sure about this but there may be a very few video clips around of a scene with Hitler losing his rag in his bunker. Watching all of them might fill in a week or two.
The gay pirates have the patch over their left eye or is it the other way around?
If there’s a patch over both eyes then do not trust that pirate with your seeing-eye dog.
I believe that Substance has posted this at some point, but the thread is incomplete without it.
“Now, I was buying into the whole gay pirate invasion story right until this last bit. I have more than a little experience in the art of gay seduction and I can testify that plying some guy with free booze, even with a little float building thrown in for good measure, is not going to lead a perfectly straight college kid to consent to being whisked off for a little game of hide-the-sausage with a pirate or anyone else. ”
In Eugene’s defense, even the great Tintin must admit that drinking too many appletinis does make a guy kinda gay.
Once you’ve done the bolero with a torero you want no more-o the senora, as they say, more or less, in Seville.
He made you grab the handle and you toreadore?
In Eugene’s defense, even the great Tintin must admit that drinking too many appletinis does make a guy kinda gay.
Or smoking, for that matter.
There are even countless stories of any number of immoral sex act being performed by open homosexuals – some even in broad daylight during the event.
Really! I mean, NO ONE would want to watch a bunch of reasonably buff men sweating while they pump their arms and pound their balls in the hot Florida sun! But enough about spring training…
And then there’s the “gay pirates”!
I second “The Train”. Great movie about Nazis vs. French Resistance. Conservatives may be confused as to who to root against though.
Float-building? Pirates? Thread needs more Blutarsky.
Chewing bubble gum constantly (aspartame, which causes temporary retardation)….They are always doing diet things for extra doses of aspartame.
Sounds similar to Gerald Loughner’s fixation on grammar.
Sounds similar to Gerald Loughner’s fixation on grammar.
NO MOAR SENTANCE FRAGMINTS!!!!!!!!!!!!
NO MOAR SENTANCE FRAGMINTS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Say wha?????????
BTW, before Shrub made him SECDEF, Rumsfeld made millions of dollars in the private sector by relentlessly pushing aspartame through government wickets.
And then there’s the “gay pirates”!
“We Are Family” indeed
By the way…
Really? Really, Eugene?
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
February 10, 2011 at 0:41
You know, there’s a “pegleg” joke in here somewhere.
A little help!
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
February 10, 2011 at 0:44
Maybe I can just pull that “pegleg” joke out of my ass.
You really needed an email accomplice here.
Eugene Del Gaudy O sounds like a Radical Homosexual to me. Definitely much gayer than “Steve”.
Definitely much gayer than “Steve”.
You would never expect Steve. That’s how he turned Adam.
You would never expect Steve.
Indeed! TinTin’s well-endowed and insatiable toreadore was named Stevedore.
Damn! Can I still be hetero if I go by Stephen? Or my middle name, Ross? Or do I need to come up with a good nickname.
Same dilemma here. (Well, Robert instead of Ross.) I’ve got a pool-shooting moniker, however. Stone Cold Stevie Ray T_______, the Wizard of Highlandtown.
“You would never expect Steve”
Nobody expects the Spanish Stevequisition.
OF course, it’s too soon! DK-W paid for a double with the corpse! Do you know how hard it is to get twice scale these days? Wait your turns, dammit!
actor’s mom was barely cold
But honestly? Truth be told,
The difference I could hardly tell.
That’s one lady he can continue to sell.
The difference I could hardly tell.
Not sure here, DK-W, but I think you dissed yourself.
And now your mom’s OFFICIALLY the whore…
Toreadore
Stevedore
He went in
Through the Out door.
Not sure here, DK-W, but I think you dissed yourself.
No, it was your mom that dissed me. Even now she still does things to me and will continue to until you close my tab.
So. WRONG.
True that, Chris. (I’m still wired into AJ / Egypt, btw).
Even now she still does things to me and will continue to until you close my tab.
She can’t be zombified. We had the bitch cremated.
Actor: It’s good to see you back.
Nazis in fillum? “Army of Shadows”
Bruce Campbell was great in that one!
WHAT?
“Bruce Campbell was great in that one!”
Tee hee!
Actor, it’s good to see your back.
You see what I do there.
Okay, yes, The Eagle Has Landed; The Train (gripping as hell); Army of Shadows (terrifying — the director was in the Resistance); Eye of the Needle; OF COARS you need The Dirty Dozen and Kelly’s Heroes; the Guns of Navarone, also, too; and Attack (Jack Palance steals the picture). Many moar.
We have a large selection of war flims here at the Castle Grayskull.
Mubarak remains in office. So of course, the markets rise….
Von Ryans Express? No one? Really?
What is this splinter doing in my bu– Oh, Spengler!
We have a large selection of war flims here at the Castle Grayskull.
Castle Grayskull, or Brokeback Snake Mountain?
Inglorious Basterds is a combo of The Train, Kelly’s Heroes, The Dirty Dozen, and Where Eagles Dare, more or less. That’s a good un too (Eastwood’s in it). There’s a super thriller about a British fellow hiking in pre-war Germany who has the chance to shoot Godwin’s friend, but doesn’t; I forgot the fucking name of it.
And let’s not forget The Battle of Britain, with all them airyoplanes.
Man Hunt! I remembered. Fritz Lang directed it, I think.
SPLINTER??? It’s easily the diameter of a pencil. Damn you Actor, I was prepared to be gentle.
She can’t be zombified. We had the bitch cremated.
Actor is a piker. I gave my mother’s rotting corpse to science. Didn’t cost a penny!
Also Starship Troopers.
I think Chris should skip the films and read Mother Night in full view of the CPAC attendees. Then he should bang the beejeezus out of Chunky Reese Witherspoon, if she’s in attendance.
The gay pirates have the patch over their left eye or is it the other way around? I can never keep that straight.
That’s the squick code. If you wear a patch over the left eye, you’re a top. If you wear the patch over the right eye, you’re into giving orbit-jobs.
While we know Eugene wears his hanky on the right, I wonder what color he wears. Probably white with multicolor spots.
The Great Dictator
And let us not forget Donald Duck as a Nazi
I Am The Very Model of a Modern Homosexual
[chorus omitted. For stage performance, see Pup @ 22:59]
I am the very model of a modern homosexual.
I’m stylish, good at cooking, a good-looking intellectual.
At passing legislation, though, I’m largely ineffectual.
I’m sometimes into S&M as long as it’s consensual.
I’m clever with the crudites, especially asparagus.
And I ignore Republicans whenever they disparage us.
I think about adoption when I shop for baby carriages,
While planning out my Boston trip and dreaming of gay marriages.
I decorate with tasteful sprays of flowers and dried ears of corn.
And I would not be caught dead in an outfit I’ve already worn.
For esoteric sex acts that are highly unconventional,
I am the very model of a modern homosexual.
I love to make an entrance at a party, so I dash in late.
I’m just an international male Calvin Klein fashion plate.
I’ve done so many drugs that my complexion’s in an ashen state.
But underneath it all, I really try to be “compassionate”.
I love my gin and tonics, high colonics, and old Piaf songs.
I love “The Women”, “All About Eve” and “The World of Suzie Wong”.
My last to trip to New York, I shopped until I dropped a Bloomingdales.
From menswear down to fragrances, they never had such booming sales.
When I am in a gay bar, I know I’m the biggest bitch in there.
And I throw dinner parties just to show off my new kitchenware.
But still in fashion, film, fine art, and anything collectible,
I am the very model of a modern homosexual.
When I can differentiate twixt “fabulous” and “exquisite”,
When I see some androgynous club kid and know which sex it is,
When I know every detail of Miss Martha Stewart’s living room,
When I know how much–retail–every what each who is giving whom,
When I have learned what progress has been made in modern sodomy,
When I know more of brainless boys than doctors of lobotomy,
In short, with just a smattering of good cosmetic surgery,
I’ll sidestep how unflattering I’d look from “binge and perjery”.
My fancy for the Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys kids’ mystery books
And I how throw a party surely puts me in the history books,
But still as a good-looking, good-at-cooking intellectual,
I am the very model of a modern homosexual.
MOAR HITLAR WAR: ‘Come and See’ is incredible, a harsh and amazing film, but not a ton of fun; A Bridge too Far, natch, should be on any list; The Cruel Sea is a good’n; Hitchcock’s Foreign Correspondent is not to be missed — the plane crash remains a benchmark sequence. You’ll want Das Boot for the other side. Patton, for the big picture. Bogart shows up in “Sahara,” which is a minor but fun tank movie, and he’s also in some North African thing about refugees… All I remember is he owns a bar in that one.
And about 30 more. Never mind. Hi, everybody! Pirates! ROAR!
And, Chris, The Great Escape.
You’ll want Das Boot for the other side.
Das Butt
**stolen from the Simpsons**
Battleground. Go for Broke.
Pirate Lurker: ver’ nice.
“Das Boot”–Arkansas!!
Applause for Pirate Lurker!
Go For Broke!
Is available for viewing online at: http://www.archive.org/details/Go_for_Broke
Yaaay public domain!
-K
Oh, and Lurker, I found your missing attribution:
© 1996. “Dirty Little Showtunes!” Tom Orr.
Thenk yew, maddog. Plans for the
afternoonearly evening now shot.I lift my MD 20/20 to you!
The Dirty Dozen and Kelly’s Heroes; the Guns of Navarone
Outstanding films! Don’t know Heroes, but major thumbs up for Dozen and Guns! Both have dynamite ensemble casts. Dirty Dozen: Lee Marvin , Donald Sutherland, Charles Bronson; Guns of Navarone: Gregory Peck, David Niven, Anthony Quinn.
Saving Private Ryan. Also.
And Saving Ryan’s Privates. Not to be missed.
No wimmins making WWII film suggestions, I notice. Testosterone City.
And Saving Ryan’s Privates. Not to be missed.
I thought it was Shaving Ryan’s Privates.
Thanks. And, of course, thanks to Pup!
Top Five Nazi Zombie Movies.
YW.
Sweet Dreams.
Kelley’s Heroes is worth a look, if only because it is so lamely bizarre. Donald Sutherland as the beatnik/hippie (I kid you not!) tank commander is not to be missed.
And Telly S., Clint & Rickles. Plus it’s interminable.
If we’re still recommending anti-Nazi movies, might I suggest a 70’s exploitation gem called “The Tormentors”?
Nazi bikers vs. hippies. And the leader of the hippies is Jesus. No really, he’s literally Jesus.
Surf Nazis Must Die.
B^4: Didja see yer eagles?
Dammit, I might have to switch teams
Don’t forget “The Great Dictator” by Charlie Chaplin.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0032553/
Do you know who else had a mustache like Chaplin?
Go For Broke!
I would recommend the book (I know, there’s that fag talk we talked about) Yankee Samurai, about the actions of the Nisei in the Pacific Theater. There’s an account of a Nisei GI being lowered naked (to demonstrate that he was unarmed) into a cavern in Okinawa so he could persuade the people inside to surrender. If that wouldn’t make for a great, tense scene in a film, what the hell would?
B^4: Didja see yer eagles?
Yeah, I went where they dared, baby!
I probably saw a half-dozen (I saw at least two adults and a juvenile in a park, and one, maybe two, when I got to the job site). Those babies cover a lot of ground, so I may have seen a couple of them twice.
I don’t care for war films, but I can offer this which is tangentially related to this thread
And another for Chris:
My favorite track from my favorite blues album.
There’s an account of a Nisei GI being lowered naked (to demonstrate that he was unarmed) into a cavern in Okinawa
ITO HIDEAKI!!!
Oh! Or Hiroki Narimiya!
They are Japanese, not Japanese-American but I know they could learn English! I would say Russell Wong, but that’s racist.
I don’t care for war films, but I can offer this which is tangentially related to this thread
Wow. He must get a LOTTA DUDES.
“Wow. He must get a LOTTA DUDES”
I know, right?
Breaking on AL: White House releases statement in response to Mubarak’s speech. Says transfer of power to Suleiman is insufficent. Seems stronger than past statements. No link for (longish text), but you folks can find it easily, I’m sure.
My favorite track from my favorite blues album.
Niiiiiiiiiice
OT, if there is a T anymore, but bughunter could easily become bunghunter for the purpose of gay pirate threads.
But not nearly as strong as needed (IMO) and w-a-y late. US has been moving inch-by-inch for 18 fucking days now.
They are Japanese, not Japanese-American but I know they could learn English!
I am now picturing pedestrian dancing around the office singing this.
Oh, and here’s another plug for Guns of Navarone.
White House releases statement in response to Mubarak’s speech. Says transfer of power to Suleiman is insufficent. Seems stronger than past statements.
I really think that he may have been pwned with the rest of us. I heard his speech in Michigan before Mubarak spoke and he was strongly hinting at some sort of a historic climax and congratulating the people for their victory. Ordinarily I would think that Mubarak gave the White House a cal lto get the green light before digging in – but then why would Obama throw egg on his face?
I suspect that Obama expected him to resign just like the media and at the last minute Mubarak decided that everyone could go to hell.
Oh, over the 30 years I’ve used this nym, it’s been bastardized to bunghunter, butthunter, butthugger, butthunger, and many others. My favorite, though, was beerhunter.
I gave my mother’s rotting corpse to science.
I have mine in the attic in a wicker chair.
WWII movie: “Christabel.” Damned creepy with almost no violence.
Oh, and quelle surprise!!
Well, shit, Mubarek is what, 82 years old?
Why would anyone expect him to be anything other than “you damn kids get offa my lawn?”
Also, too. For my money this is the most awesome blues song ever recorded. Hard to believe that one guy is making all of that sound.
Ever since I read Mary Roach’s book Stiff, I have figured I’d leave my body to science, but I can’t decide whether I’d rather give medical students nightmares in the anatomy lab, or be of use as a putrefying teaching tool at the Body Farm.
But I’m going to think of something else now.
I can’t decide whether I’d rather give medical students nightmares in the anatomy lab, or be of use as a putrefying teaching tool at the Body Farm.
I want to be used for pranks in the medical-school cafeteria.
Larkspur – not to worry; when you donate your body to science, you don’t really get to stipulate how it gets used. So your head might end up on a tray for plastic surgeons to practice on, while your fingers might get used to figure out how much force an automatic car window motor should have so it won’t break fingers. (I read that book too…quite fascinating.)
Parceled out properly, you could star in a lot of pranks, N_B. I’m impressed.
Never eat cafeteria liver.
Huh, Jennifer. I did not know that. I guess that’s why people who think the dead shall be raised up on Judgment Day probably don’t tend to leave their bodies to science. It would be weird to show up wearing a windshield, or in bits and pieces.
Jennifer, weren’t you sort of comforted by the section in the book about medical cadavers, and how respectful the students were? And how they had a memorial service for their cadavers at the end of the semester? It sounds like I am making a morbid joke (who, me?) but I am serious. Mary Roach really did write about it.
Medical school or flames for me.
I’m ID’ed as an organ donor (if 60+ organs can help). If you are not an organ donor, consider becoming one.
Jennifer is right about John Lee Hooker. he was the man.
We had a great programme ont Telly about donating ones body to the medical school. With interviews of the donaters. Fascinating and yeah, the students were very respectful. One old lady said that she would like to see the look on the face of the student who could only find one kidney in her.
Looking forward to listening to all the Blues links later! Back to Egypt.
One old lady said that she would like to see the look on the face of the student who could only find one kidney in her.
She hid the other three?
Jennifer, I’m with you on the John Lee Hooker. I’m also very fond of Mr. T-Bone Walker and, in a completely different vein, Ms. Bessie Smith
Larkspur – I don’t know about “comforted”…though it’s nice to know they are respectful of the corpses. Funerals where the body is displayed have always squicked me out; I’m really not keen on the idea of people looking at my dead body after I’m no longer there, and I think that is probably in everyone’s mind somewhere – if so, it would be the rare person who would be other than respectful. As for me, after they harvest whatever they can use, I’m gonna get burned.
Better Blues at Sunrise Link. The other one had 5 minutes cut off the beginning. Explore the related links at the right, too. Vaughan and King were awesome together…
I can’t decide whether I’d rather give medical students nightmares in the anatomy lab, or be of use as a putrefying teaching tool at the Body Farm.
Just have your loved ones throw you into a crevasse in a glacier, then when you thaw out in
10,000 years(oh, who am I kidding, climate change isreal) 50 years, future scientists can examine you (or starving mutants can eat you).I plan on having my corpse thrown in the municipal water supply.
I’m really not keen on the idea of people looking at my dead body after I’m no longer there
Especially when you’re tarted up with more makeup than you’d worn throughout your entire life!
Bury me at sea, where no murdered ghost can haunt me.
Which brings us back to, you got it,
time machinespirates.Medical school or flames for me.
With my luck, I’d end up being a crash-test dummy. (Although one of the nice things about atheism is that you don’t care.)
With my luck, I’d end up being a crash-test dummy
Ugh, that band sucked.
I plan on having my corpse thrown in the municipal water supply.
FYI, those big manholes in the street aren’t water supply.
FYI, those big manholes in the street aren’t water supply.
Yeah, they’re adits for C.H.U.D.s.
Well, shit, Mubarek is what, 82 years old?
Odd thought: What do Hosni Mubarak, Ferdinand Marcos, and Ronald Reagan have in common?
None of them had a single gray hair on their heads.
lulz, Larkspur.
Go to 2:43 on this video. What’s Mubarak doing coaching a Dutch soccer team?
I thought all the pay-trolls were laid off after the election.
Hey: B^4 has a guest shot on tonight’s CSI.
Maybe he’s being crazy on spec?
Dunno, Scribe. Maybe he plans to convert the stadium into a lavish exile palace?
Hey: B^4 has a guest shot on tonight’s CSI.
Fer realz? That rocks! (Wish I had a TV. Can someone do one of those YouTube watchamacallits?)
Don’t forget the Lost Continent of Atlantis, the Republic of Turkaloo, the Empire of Freedonia, the Flyspeck Islands, the Austro-Hungarian Exiles, the Land of Oz, Utopia, Eldorado, Shangrila, the Oceania-Eastasia Alliance, the Principality of Quintana Roo, West Bumblefuck and the No Brains Atoll.
MAGISTER HELMET SCRIVULATE
This is a time to act in your own self interests, to arg blarg monster truck penis any international connection, relationship, accords, or walrus as tenuous at best with an American-Israeli delicatessin in decline. It is time to step back and masturbate what is not only best within each of your Buttocks of Sodomy, not only in the short but long term, for the rest of the Spherical Globular Round Things That Are Not Square into the [21st] and [22nd] Century [and the very early part of the 23d Century, inclusive], this is a dangerous year of flatulence, in the down slide of the Second Empire Style Haunted House to its end in [2020, on or near August 15th, probably mid-day], the Wheel of Fate has Changed (and it’s not a full-size spare, dammit), your nations and Spheres hold the spheres of Beyonce’s buttocks in your hands, starting at this moment in history (as of this time which is now, not later, certainly not earlier, although getting to be later as I write this), you hold in your hands the moral authority, a book of matches, a comb, half a pack of Spearmint Gum, and a canceled check from Blockbuster, domestically and internationally, and intellectual leadership lacking within the Empire (except from Mr. Krauthammer, AKA Strangelove, AKA the Book of Kells), your time has come, the future rests with you, Dr. G. Westerwelle of Germany, Mr. Shapiro of Rabinowitz Tailoring on 47th St., President Hu Jintao, of the Peoples Republic of China (and president pro tem of the Hong Kong Gold Club Alliance), Prime Minister Yukio Hatoyama, of Scranton, PA, and President Dmitry Medvedev of the Isaac Asimov Appreciation Society, ready or not your time has come, single one world government of the Empire, and its Media Messiah Imperial President rule by executive power and authority can not be that of the Community of Nations. And that goes double for you.
Ever since I read Mary Roach’s book Stiff, I have figured I’d leave my body to science, but I can’t decide whether I’d rather give medical students nightmares in the anatomy lab, or be of use as a putrefying teaching tool at the Body Farm.
Me, I’m going to be cremated and turned into a reef ball.
Because goodness knows, I didn’t ball enough in life.
[Heineken!]
The New [PVC] Poly Vinyl Chloride Tubular Beer Dispenser!
the Principality of Quintana Roo
Dammit, I distinctly told that taxi driver to take me to Fernando Poo.
Actor is a piker. I gave my mother’s rotting corpse to science. Didn’t cost a penny!
Piker… I do not think that word means what you think it means…
[I’m Hercule Triathlon Savinien Myra]
You, um, changed genders…
Spengler: Fucking wall-to-wall hilarious. That’s genius at work, folks.
“Vaughan and King”
I was sitting in Antone’s, Austin’s legendary blues club, one night when Jimmy Vaughn and the Fab T-Birds were at their best. Late in the evening Stevie Ray (to whom I often served fresh lime Margaritas at Lakeway and also play the video game on the bar to see who paid; fucker owed me $40 when he died) came in with a large guy who I couldn’t really see. Yeah, of course a few minutes later Stevie Ray and B.B. King were on stage and it was FUCKING BEYOND AWESOME.
This is a time to act in your own self interests, to arg blarg monster truck penis any international connection
Oh, Spengler! It IS you!
OK if fag pirates want to buttfuck people in Miami, so what? I still don’t get the homophobia thing. Buttfucking is heaps of fun, it’s pretty much impossible unless you’re willing to go along with it, and most people don’t in any case want to fuck a bunch of unpleasant, dogmatic, pasty, slack-assed douchebags — fore, aft, or otherwise — if there are attractive and enthusiastic alternative candidates available for said sport. I think SOMEBODY yearns for the love that dare not speak his phone number.
Then again, I’m a hedonist, a swine, and I went to art school.
Fuck…you ever sit and edit photos and look at one and realize you have no idea what the hell you were shooting?
Drudge sent a little E-mail saying his lawyers, said it wasn’t to good of an idea to let us post
That wasn’t his lawyers. That was your doctors.
Fuck…you ever sit and edit photos and look at one and realize you have no idea what the hell you were shooting?
PROTIP: Take the lens cap off.
I still don’t get the homophobia thing.
Because it means, somewhere, someone is having a good time.
PROTIP: Take the lens cap off.
My teacher told me I might scratch the lens if I did.
[58%] Want Smaller Government
[59%] Want Tax Cuts
[59%] Want The Deficit Cut
[75% – 83%] Dislike and/or blame all politicians, for the pickle were in.
…and 100% want all their services continued.
HERCULES QUADRICEPS DIAZEPAM reminds me very, very, very much of a rampaging twat who destroys the comments over at Truthdig, usually on the Chris Hedges threads. This party has some one-world imaginary kingdom of bullshit going, and these enormous copypasta comments which are highly similar to Herc’s rantings.
If it’s the same individual, let’s remember who mocked you cross-eyed over there until he had to be banned, shall we? I’m not above making light of unmedicated psychotics.
*The United City-State Federation of Brooklyn and Queens
*The Republic of the Bronx
*The City-State of Manhattan
PSST! N__B! B^4!
Dibs on Manhattan! We can be princes, man!
And I want a pony.
Piker… I do not think that word means what you think it means…
In the sense that you didn’t go all out for total disrespect. Whereas I did, & came out ahead on the deal.
B^4, we shall afford no sleep to Brooklyn when next I’m there. We shall reign as KINGS OF NIGHT!!!!
The Anarcho-Syndicalist Collective of Flatbush.
In the sense that you didn’t go all out for total disrespect.
Ohhhhhhhh…
Would it help restore my cred if I said her final wish was to be donated to science? And I still had her cremated?
The Caliphate of Burlington Coat Factory
we shall afford no sleep to Brooklyn when next I’m there.
Nobody actually sleeps IN Brooklyn, you know.
Ok, so I’ve installed Greasemonkey and I’ve enabled the kill file. How do I add creatures with heroic classical names to it? Help plz!
Spengler, can I buy you a drink?
Emir of the Laundromat
Brooklyn hath murdered sleep
And now Brooklyn shall sleep no more.
I’m not above making light of unmedicated psychotics.
Seriously. Stay the fuck off my lawns.
I am not unfamiliar w/ restraining orders, & I’m pretty sure I could get one against someone else.
A whore! A whore! My KINGSCOUNTYdom for a whore!
Lord of the Fire Escape
[75% – 83%] Dislike and/or blame all politicians, for the pickle were in.
BUT WHO DOESN’T LOVE PICKLES?!!!
Dibs on Manhattan! We can be princes, man!
Dibs on Berlin.
*The Kingdom of Connecticut
Oh right… An Arthurian Yankee in the King of Connecticut’s Court. I had to read that in middle school.
Hercule: That long post was really something. (What sort of something, I’m not exactly sure….)
All I can add is the Bill and Hillary, IMO, are douchebag and douchebagette. (Or is that douchebaguette?) Anyways, Bill and the DLC drove me out of the Democratic Party and I ain’t never goin’ back.
Lord of the Fire Escape
*GASP*
I’m….I’m….words fail me, m’luds, m’ladies. This is outstanding!
I don’t like your stealing all the good lines business doktor.
> [THE MAP OF NEW YORK CITY METRO AREA WILL CHANGE!!!!]
Man, that is just going to play havoc with the transit systems and other municipal services…
Are you sure that we can’t just let Master Blaster run Bartertown?
-K
PS – King of Connecticut? It’s a little late to go crawling back to Mother England wouldn’t you say?
The Kingdom of Connecticut
Aw, fuck…Bobo Wens will try to move up here…
No sex w/ androids!
“You laugh, but it’s true!”
By the way, Actor, I think you understand me when I say that losses like you have suffered throw the brevity of life cruelly into view, and all the things we wish we’d said and done can never be retrieved. The loss of one’s mother is like the world forgetting its beginning, forgetting its soul, forgetting most of all the infinite debt it owes to those who bring it into being for all of us. I am sincerely, deeply sorry about your mom.
She was breathing when I left.
*refusing to admit that Spengler had me roaring with laughter*
Yes. Her passing was sudden, and left a large hole in my life.
Should I mail the socks?
Now, the City-State of Manhattan, will be like [Singapore] or [Hong Kong] or even the [Athens] of ANCIENT GREECE
Openly gay and in brackets?
Actor nailed you. That just makes it even more geniouser, Mr. Dampniche.
Actor nailed you.
Uh oh…
I don’t like your stealing all the good lines business doktor.
I am not sharing the drugs that keep me thin.
Vtubesock holocaustR
Too soon: when is it?
Also like the nym change, Arthur.
[Heineken!]
Heineken? Fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!
Well, she did leave an ample supply of fresh tubesocks. I was thinking of donating them to a nursing home for the terminally Teabagging.
SNIDELY, IS THAT YOU?
Not you, Actor. Sorry. I freaked out.
Pabst Blue Ribbon!
Boy, what goes round come around. When I was a kid, Pabst was the “rich guy’s” beer, mostly because they sponsored the Yankees, and everyone drank Rheingold or Schlitz. ‘
Hell, even Bud was “designer”…
Heineken? Fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!
Elitist. It’s Schlitz or nothing.
She was breathing when I left.
Fuck. I’ve been nurturing this motherfucking schtick for who knows how long and you have to go and drop a masterpiece like that. And it’s hard for me to appreciate the genius and art of it when I am seething with jealousy.
pedestrian, do you really need help killing stuff, or are you joking? Because if you installed the greasemonkey thing, you should be seeing (kill) next to the time and date stamp of every comment. You press (kill) and it asks if you want to add this name to your kill file, and you say yes. Henceforth you have the option to unkill or autopsy that commenter’s comments. ‘Course, every time the offender changes its nym, you have to kill it again, but it’s easy and fun.
Heineken? Fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!
Rheingold!
Wait. I always thought New York a dukedom.
“Fuck. I’ve been nurturing this motherfucking schtick for who knows how long and you have to go and drop a masterpiece like that. And it’s hard for me to appreciate the genius and art of it when I am seething with jealousy.”
And yet this is kind of genius in itself.
I’ve been nurturing this motherfucking schtick for who knows how long and you have to go and drop a masterpiece like that.
It’s like New Wave was to punk…
Wait. I always thought New York a dukedom.
Wrong Duke
There will also be a PEOPLE’S REPUBLIC OF GREATER NEW ENGLAND, some people dream of uniting of New England [EXCEPT for the portions near NEW YORK]
So Connecticut, New Hampshire, Rhode Island….no go?
Not much left of New England except Vermont, Maine and Massachussets…you sure they taught you geography in high school?
Did you bother attending?
Wrong Duke
I call shenanigans. That Duke is wearing a Dodgers jersey, and we all know that the Dodgers are based in the city of Artful.
> …and the [Maritime Provinces] of Canada to form a …
So you fancy getting shot in the face by a drunken Canuck eh?
Kinky…
-K
Here’s to the state of Mississippi.
The Pharaoh of Sam the Sham
@Larkspur
Bless you! It was too obvious, that was the problem. I thought that I had to insert it into the code somewhere. *gives kill finger some warm-up stretches*
We meant to say NEW YORK CITY.
We?
Dude, up the meds.
Here’s to the state of Mississippi.
Maybe we shouldn’t’ve let the South put up memorials to the leaders of the Slavers’ Revolt.
[ACTOR KICKS TRIATHLON IN THE NADS]
We were aiming for the penis, but missed.
TEXIFORNIA
Well, at least they’d all go bankrupt in one package. We could try to trade them to Mexico for Tijuana. Or at least some marijuana.
* America: The Confederate States of America
Herk, we can finally find common ground.
THIS, you can have.
But only if I can build a fucking border fence around the pansyass rednecks and keep their lillylivers out of my America.
GIVE ME PIE OR GIVE ME DEATH!
Try being a Red Headed Whiskey drinking no prospects Catholic Irishman dating a dark haired, dark eyed brain Greek Orthodox, chick
CSI: Miami – right?
BUT I WILL SETTLE FOR A MALLOMAR!!
A new Empire? They’re putting in a garden bar?
pssst. You’ve only got four pillars. What are you, anti-beatboxing?
The Fifth Pillar of Society
Common To My Parlour – Every residence will have one room designed to meet very specific standards (a place for your mom to lie on her back) which cause flies to drop.
Oh, yeah, that reminds me that I need to download Greasemetal.
. And it’s hard for me to appreciate the genius and art of it when I am seething with jealousy.
Yeah, I find myself cursing him quite a bit.
Oh, it’s built in now. I’m a tard.
Back online. Before I head to bed,
1) Thanks for all the WW2 movie suggestions.
2) Hmm. Sadly, No! has a(nother) cave troll. Not going to feed it, but I did see the words “cotton picking” in there somewhere as I scrolled past his word-vomit and would like to register my complete lack of surprise that such nomenclature would come from a troll.
3) Is Mubarak nuts? Retiring and turning the country over to Suleiman and the military, and letting them begin a slow path towards reform might’ve been enough to placate the protestors and those in the West who sympathize with them, and ensure a safe retirement for himself. Instead he doubles down on the crazy by flipping the bird to his own people and the entire world.
And from the one article I skimmed about the Egyptian people’s reaction, damn. They SO MAD. I don’t blame them.
Hrrrghhhghghhgmmmghghgmmmrrghghghllmmmghghghhhhh
*gobblegobblegobblegobble*
fywpwargw
PSST! N__B! B^4! Dibs on Manhattan! We can be princes, man!
Typical NYC aristocrats! (I would prefer to see the People’s Democratic Socialist Collective of Manhattan.)
Nevertheless, with you guys in charge, I would definitely visit the Federated Provinces of NYC.
HERCULE ?
SRSLY?
The band needs to install some of that nasty-ass Killer stuff to go along with our killer music.
But that pissant Eddie our equipment guy got all ratsass on everybody and won’t talk to us anymore. So we’ll need a simple wiring diagram to splain how to do it. Really, really simple. Remember all the trouble we had figuring our how tags are wired?
We totally rock. But we’re The Luddite Pirates, after all.
“Nothing brings a family together like kidnapping, robbery on the high seas, plank-walking, rum-drinking, some fitful sodomy, and, of course, the occasional lash.”
You’re confused. That’s the Royal Navy.
Hercule: Stay on your meds. The other Sadlies may be joking, but I’m absolutely serious: Stay on your meds.
I’m no psychiatrist, only a patient. But your stuff reads like you’re in full-blown manic mode, like you’re off a mood stabilizer. I’m serious: Get some help. Stay on your meds.
HERCULE ?
SRSLY?
SRSLY. Like this guy:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyrano_de_Bergerac
I still don’t know where “TRIATHLON” comes from, though.
five hundred ninety 1th
BUT WHO DOESN’T LOVE PICKLES?!!!
PICKLE SURPRISE!!
Actor: Spengler said it far better. It seems to me there is a mysterious bond between parents and children…and so very deep and special between mothers and children. Is there a more painful sundering?
I’m saddened by your loss, Actor. Take some beautiful photographs.
Fernando Poo
Epic: my copy of the original printing of R.A.W.’s Schrodinger’s Cat just arrived.
Brutal: I don’t have any weed.
meh
I gave my mother’s rotting corpse to science.
I would like to give my body to poetry but WHERE DO I SIGN UP???
The Dead Poets Society?
When I say ‘poetry’ I do not mean ‘crass limericks by DKW or Substance’.
Also IMHO not enough people leave their bodies to geography.
Good Nazi movie: ‘Downfall’ (Untergang)
Uh, and ‘Rats of Tobruk’
Mamamama My Sharia!
http://motherjones.com/mojo/2010/12/sharia-fever-catch-it
http://thebrainpolice.blogspot.com/2010/12/payback-is-bitch.html
“Religious sectarian law” means any statute, tenet or body of law evolving within and binding a specific religious sect or tribe. Religious sectarian law includes Sharia law, Canon law, Halacha and Karma but does not include any law of the United States or the individual states based on Anglo-American legal tradition and principles on which the United States was founded.”
“religious sectarian law includes Sharia law, Canon law,
i.e. worshipers of the god Cathol]
Halacha
[had to look this word up. Jewish Law! Really?]
and Karma
[I think they think she is the most powerful of the Hindu gods which is why islamohindicommies can sometimes be heard to say “Karma is a bitch! Ergo, The Bitch Goddess! All kidding aside, I think parts of this country should be really concerned about Karma these days]
http://www.jewfaq.org/halakhah.htm
“Religious sectarian law” means any statute, tenet or body of law evolving within and binding a specific religious sect or tribe.
Glasgow Rangers fandom included?
I just saw a lady on a scooter like the one I used to have. I totes pointed and laughed.
Hers was nicer, but it didn’t have streamers.
Was she encankled?
Yes, The Pirate Lurkers is IceNine/Snidely/The Variants. I figured it out immediately; he had a distinct writing style that always gives him away.
Pirate, if you’re reading this, I want to echo what B^4 said on my blog: I think you’d make an exceptional blog author. With your life experience and all your stories…it’s a perfect fit. You should go to Blogger and sign up.
has
Epic: my copy of the original printing of R.A.W.’s Schrodinger’s Cat just arrived.
How can you be sure?
Also IMHO not enough people leave their bodies to geography.
I very nearly left my body to gym class.
I left my body to peyote once but HE GAVE IT BACK.
and I went to art school.
you know who else went to art school? and then things….escalated…
and then my tag failed…
Stephen…I love you.
The latest smear against J. Assange: sprog littering.
I really don’t know what to believe anymore now that the world’s most powerful organizations are pissed off at him.
Also: He seemed really, really well prepared for that 60 Minutes interview last month. Like they fed him the questions a week in advance… or, more likely, asked him questions he’s fielded many times before.
Stephen…I love you.
i know, right?!?!?
Do NOT open the box.
Megs always knows how to cheer me up.
I really don’t know what to believe anymore now that the world’s most powerful organizations are pissed off at him.
I know, it’s not so different from the way that the internal dynamics of an authoritarian regime are hinted at in the state press. We’ve gotten used to learning which country we are going to invade from the media portrayal of its leaders, but to see it directed at a private individual is a new level of creepy.
How the fuck did this dumb, misogynistic forward end up in my inbox?
”
I love the last one!!
Japanese scientists have created a camera with a shutter speed so fast, they can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
***
A boy asks his granny, ‘Have you seen my pills, they were labelled LSD?’
Granny replies, screw the pills, have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?!
***
A woman standing nude in front of a mirror says to her husband, I look horrible, I feel fat & ugly, pay me a compliment.’ He replies, ‘Your eyesight is perfect.’
***
Wife gets naked & asks hubby, ‘What turns you on more, my pretty face or my sexy body?’ Hubby looks her up & down and replies, ‘Your sense of humor!
***
An elderly couple is attending Mass…
About halfway through, the wife leans over and says to her husband , ‘I just let out a silent fart; what do you think I should do?’ He replies, “Put a new battery in your hearing aid.”
T&U: Tried to leave a comment at yer place, but got the ‘system error’ message…and couldn’t send an e-mail to Admin, so I’m using S,N as comms.
Others: Drop by T&U’s site. She has a clip of Dick Cheney being called out by a brave soul at CPAC for exactly what he is.
Hart Williams has been on a roll, lately.
Hart writes some of the best, most well-researched original content on the web. But be warned, he does get rather long-winded, as he readily admits.
Shorter Scott Johnson, Powerline:
“Others: Drop by T&U’s site. She has a clip of Dick Cheney being called out by a brave soul at CPAC for exactly what he is.”
I would love to, but can’t here at work. Will visit this afternoon. How the hell can they block her site, Digby and Atrios, but allow me to waste my day here at S,N!, Wonkette, FDL, B-J, etc.? I’m affeared that if I complain, the suits would say, “Hmmm. He’s right.” And they would then proceed to block S,N!, Wonkette, FDL, B-J, etc. So, I continue to live my life of quiet desperation…….
A question for those here who read Frech, is this true?
……..and the Hart Williams site is also blocked.
A question for those here who read Frech, is this true?
It is true that the accent is facing the wrong way.
I wasn’t actually aware of the French word for “period” (was an innocent twelve years old the last time I lived there), so I looked it up on fr.wikipedia.org. Apparently, that is not true. The word for “period” is the same spelling (accent at all) as the word for “rules.”
So maybe he actually did mean to say “my life, my period” and couldn’t spell.
God wrote in the Constitution that polygamy is as bad as slavery
By which God meant, they are both totally ok as long as men pay a fair price for as many wives and slaves that they care to own.
they are both totally ok as long as men pay a fair price for as many wives and slaves that they care to own.
Is it constitutional to buy in bulk at discount?
I shat.
Here a guy thinks he’s won the internazz for the day, and then somebody hits a bank shot off a frigging passing helicopter and straight into the ninth hole to win the tournament.
From my inbox:
“Amazon.com recommends “Grade 2 Zinc Plated Steel Hex Bolt, 1/2″-13, 4-1/2″ Length (Pack of 5)” and more”
It’s been a full, rich life.
From mark f’s link:
“We had to wait in line to get in; the fact that people were willing to do so in yesterday’s freezing cold here in D.C. was impressive. In line, we bumped into our friends Roger Simon and Roger Kimball. It was one time when Roger Simon’s trademark hat came in handy.”
How big is Roger’s hat?
I was actually a little bit surprised to see Johnson make that argument. Not because he ever makes a good argument, but because he’s a lawyer who preens about being a “student of history”* and thinks he has a incredibly fine-tuned mind. Yet literally the only bit approaching substance, however weak, in support of his position is that “this is a subject . . . which inevitably lead[s] back to nature and nature’s God.”
*This post is a doozy. As a student of history, Scott Johnson recognizes that Nancy Pelosi is an intolerant Nazi, while those who opposed the Burlington Coat Factory Community Center are innocents just minding their own business.
Here a guy thinks he’s won the internazz
No, it was more a plea for some buds.
My Amazon recommendations include a porcelain cat creamer, a Guggenheim Museum LEGO kit, and a steel rat cage.
*stares off vacantly*
Oh em gee, I hadn’t seen Hindy’s addendum until just now:
Now I’m hoping for some kind of reality show where Tim Gunn and the guy from What Not to Wear help aspiring Breitbarts develop talking points and fashion sense.
SHOVE THAT ENORMOUS TALENT DOWN THEIR THROATS.
Mubarak resigns.
It’s a start.
I was too squeamish to press the play button on Hinderaker’s video. I don’t know if the GOProud party looked more like the club scenes in season 1 of Six Feet Under or if it was a bunch of nervous squares trying desperately to look like they actually enjoyed listening to a dj spin Lady Gaga, but either way it couldn’t be good.
Egypt to Mubarak: Alpha, Mike, Foxtrot.
Also known as what Larkspur just posted.
he’s a lawyer who preens about being a “student of history”* and thinks he has a incredibly fine-tuned mind.
In my experience, people who are self-proclaimed “students of history” tend to be ignorant assholes trying to paint a scholarly veneer over their untested prejudices.
more evidence
When I say ‘poetry’ I do not mean ‘crass limericks by DKW or Substance’.
Hey, who was it who wrote smutty sestinas because ORDER UP.
Teh Ghey Pirates are yesterday’s concern for Eugene; apparently, CPAC is now under attack by the Radical Homasexshul Agenda infliltrators!
In my experience, people who are self-proclaimed “students of history” tend to be ignorant assholes trying to paint a scholarly veneer over their untested prejudices.
In my experience, people who proclaim themselves “students of history” tend to be military history nerds (not a bad thing in itself) who subscribe to the theory that all of history worth knowing involves war.
Basically, people who can tell you every possible variation of a MiG-29’s combat payload but couldn’t find Moscow on a map if you spotted them “Western Russia” and “Moskva River.”
“When I say ‘poetry’ I do not mean ‘crass limericks by DKW or Substance’.”
BLASPHEMY!
According to people who went there in the last couple years, there were CPAC funders buying drinks for underage girls. I suppose you can whitewash that crime against Prohibition by saying that the funders were Teh Ghey.
Chris said at 17:56
Yes. This. Exactly.
Someone should start feeding Eugene tips about various conservative groups being taken over by Teh Ghey. The resulting fapping frenzy would be a virtual goldmine of entertainment.
I wonder if Eugene trolls Gay Putzriot.
Shorter Powerline link:
I am very, very uncomfortable with buttsex. Probably because the thought of it titillates me so.
The pirates fierce did don their boots
Of gleaming Spanish leather
Athwart the gunwales did they leap
To see their good friend Heather.
Heather ran a gay bar themed
Just like a pirate song
Except for the electric bull
And black lights in the john.
Now Heather was a big man, and
He took no prisoners home
Captured he a pirate
It was straight to the pleasure dome.
Pleasure dome, O pleasure dome
It was straight to the pleasure dome.
Well Sandy was a bonny pirate lad
With boots up to his thighs
His sword as long as the yardarm
His yard of a similar size.
And so one eve the pirates came
And descended they on Heather
Clad in vests and hotpants
So humid was the weather.
Clad in vests and hotpants
So humid was the weather.
…There’s more, but these traditional songs just go on and on, and plus Egypt, wow.
I don’t doubt that CPAC is a hot-spot for anonymous gay hookups, but what are all of these under-aged students doing at the alcohol parties?
Now I’m hoping for some kind of reality show where Tim Gunn and the guy from What Not to Wear help aspiring Breitbarts develop talking points and fashion sense.
Tim Gunn would never go for it. He knows conservatives can never make anything work.
Win.
I’ve been waiting for someone to compare the Egyptian celebration with Iraqi statue kubuki dance.
I’m finally caught up! Mostly I’ve been listening to 45 minutes of music links I bypassed while locked into Egypt. (I so admire these people, especially the young men who stood their ground at Tahrir during the night assault on the 29th.)
Thanks so much, VS, for your kind words and encouragement. I’ve wanted to try blogging. Maybe I can summon the courage to try it.
On the music: Dynamite stuff! So I’ll risk a longer appreciative post to respond to them.
Smedley: I loved the Enesco. (19:14) I’ve heard it before, but didn’t remember the composer or title. Now I do!
B^4: ‘Guns’ and ska! (2:39) Who would have thought it could work so well? I especially liked the trumpet work.
Pedestian (3:05): Liked ’em both. Great lyric in the Bessie Smith song: “Give me a reefer and gin.” 77 years ago. Time to legalize it.
Jennifer: Sheee-it, loves me some John Lee Hooker, too. (About a week ago I linked to JL-Bonnie Riatt duet.) George Thorogood liked him a great deal, too, and covers his work very well. (‘Bourbon, Scotch, Beer’) [Forgot to note the timecode, but you’ll find near the others.]
Bughunter (3:12 & 2:27): Saving the best for last. I absolutely love Stevie Ray! Pure. Genius. (I even incorporated his name into my pool-shooting moniker…) He punctuates Albert King’s singing so perfectly. And the backup was so tight, too. Double Trouble?
And now that I’m caught up, I’ve gotta run off again! (I do volunteer work in the recording studio of the Maryland State Library for the Blind and Physically Handicapped. My shift starts in 35 minutes.)
Well, they DO exist and they are taking advantage of the alcohol parties at CPAC to poison the minds and pollute the bodies of young conservatives who are still too naïve to know what is being done to them,”
i am going to go out on a limb here and surmise that eugene’s first experience with alcohol did not involve shagging chicks…i’m guessing he woke up feeling a hangover, a sore butt and/or throat, and some vague, but not unpleasant memories…
Mubarak resigns.
Wonder if someone in the Army finally asked him straight-up which he preferred to keep, his job or his head?
aspiring Breitbarts
“Aiming too high” is plainly not a problem here.
Tim Gunn would never go for it. He knows conservatives can never make anything work
a win AND a snort…
Follow up for Bug: IMO, Stevie Ray was the best Texas Blues player that ever lived. The best Chicago Blues player? Well, I like Buddy Guy for that ….
Maybe I can summon the courage to try it.
i believe your direct superior, Capt. Morgan can help you with this…
That reminds me, I have a couple of seriously overdue quadriplegics checked out of our local library.
(I do volunteer work in the recording studio of the Maryland State Library for the Blind and Physically Handicapped. My shift starts in 35 minutes.)
and you are awesome!
That reminds me, I have a couple of seriously overdue quadriplegics checked out of our local library
and you are funny…disturbed, but funny…
compare the Egyptian celebration with Iraqi statue kubuki dance.
as a student of history, i will say that the egyptians notably have better dancing skillz than the iraqis…
Better clubs. So to speak.
Better clubs. So to speak.
heh…
Did somebody mention Stevie?
i am going to go out on a limb here and surmise that eugene’s first experience with alcohol did not involve shagging chicks
This being the internet, I will speculate even more wildly. He strikes me as the kind of guy who did the self-loathing closet case routine throughout his youth – he spouted old-time religion, but let himself “slip” from time to time. Then as his hair began to gray and his neck begins to sag, suddenly the young guys weren’t so interested anymore. Most gay guys his age have settled down with their soul-mate, or at the very least had some meaningful relationships and developed a little maturity. But he is stuck with an adolescent libido in an old man’s body. Instead of blaming the ideology of hatred that prevented him from developing into a full human being, he feels betrayed by “gay culture”, which he believes seduced him and then discarded him.
All of his hate and paranoia is partially concern for the young people who he fears will end up as unhappy and unfulfilled as he is, but mostly bitter jealously for all the “underage students” who can still get laid.
That reminds me, I have a couple of seriously overdue quadriplegics checked out of our local library
Can’t we have one thread without coming back to Boxing Helena? We can never have anything nice…
That reminds me, I have a couple of seriously overdue quadriplegics checked out of our local library
The fines will cost you an arm and a leg.
teh gheys just stir up trouble wherever they go even posthumously…
[GROAN]
T&U (if you are around), does your blog take its name from this?
I like this pic of Eugene. Easy to ‘shop the companion.
I like this pic of Eugene. Easy to ‘shop the companion.
I had to google pics of Jeff Gannon to make sure that wasn’t Jeff Gannon. And I did NOT want to see more pictures of Jeff Gannon!
The cat was released nearby, but was hit and killed by a taxi almost immediately. Shortly thereafter the project was considered a failure and declared to be a total loss.
so, it was a cat-astrophe…
oh, come on! i make one lousy little pun and the thread dies?!?!
or are you all still laffing?
There’s no need to cauterwaul about it…
Can’t we have one thread without coming back to Boxing Helena?
You’ve got a problem with Australians?
Or caterwaul either, for that matter…
fucking spelling, how does it work?
Aha! See Natasha, nobody suspected our super seecret acoustic kitty interception dewice. I told you taxi cab was great disguise.
Oz sez, Viva Egipto!
The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch
It landed on the wicked witch in the middle of a ditch
Which was not a healty situation for the wicked witch!
The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch
It landed on the wicked witch in the middle of a ditch
Which was not a healthy situation for the wicked witch
Who began to twitch, and was reduced to just a stitch
Of what was once the wicked witch!
We thank you very sweetly for doing it so neatly
You’ve killed her so completely,
That we thank you very sweetly
Let the joyous news be spread
The wicked, old witch at last is dead
Thank you, Harold Arlen
There’s no need to cauterwaul about it…
marion, you don’t pussy foot around, do you?
Little time today. Two items to share:
1 – a href=”http://news.yahoo.com/s/theweek/212006 = Guns for Dongs [FYWP – some URLs just won’t with /anchor tags here]
2 – Variants, you’ve nailed why AK&SRV: In Session is my fave Blues album. That and their individual talent.
Oh, and the more I think about it, the more I dont understand why DKW thinks 1) I think I won the internets and 2) that a cliche comeback so obvious it happened twice is a hole in one. Really just hoping to find another R.A.W. fan to talk to. (I took care of the asativic condition. I know some musicians…) Many people find him tedious, though.
OK – only time for one today.
Random music Friday.
OK – only time for one today.
apparently the variants has access to some sort of s,n! methodone…
also, i am on crack…that was bug who has the stamina to walk away…
marion, you don’t pussy foot around, do you?
I just hope I didn’t hurt anyone’s felines… Some people can be SO sensitive.
It’s purrfectly fine.
I just hope I didn’t hurt anyone’s felines… Some people can be SO sensitive.
oh, i am not that type of persian at all! gee, this is fun isn’t it? no wonder the boys do it incessantly!
Boris Badenov said,
plus
Random music Friday.
Made me think immediately of this. The late, lamented WLIR actually used to play this, back when there were no KIDS ON MAH DAMN LAWN!!!!
The guy that designed that accoustic kitty wasn’t, by chance, named Schrodinger?
Off topic, but I just had the pure-d joy of reducing a wingnut to the LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL stage on a friend’s FB page.
His last comment: ” Yipppppeeeee yi yaaaaaaay!!! Mother Fuckers!!!”
Ahhhhhh. My work there is done.
Okay then.
Welcome back Candy, if it’s that Candy.
Yep, I’m that Candy. Hi Substance! I lurk around, just don’t say much these days.
Oh, and the more I think about it, the more I dont understand why DKW thinks 1) I think I won the internets and 2) that a cliche comeback so obvious it happened twice is a hole in one.
I’m angling for an introduction to your hawt aunt that’s into all the kink so’s I can something something twice is a hole in one.
I lurk around, just don’t say much these days.
cat got your tongue?
These cat puns have me feline down.
Cat’s got my tongue, and Zuckerberg’s got my soul. I spend way too much time on FB.
FYWP. I swear, I don’t think WP wants me to comment.
Hey!, she’s just having a paws. Sheesh
Also I’m going to smash the touchpad on my laptop with a fucking big hammer soon. Just sayin’
I’m angling for an introduction to your hawt aunt
The aunt is a trout?
This will probably not help. (BTW, I thought you were having better luck with it.)
Canadian content.
Another from former Prince band members.
I keep trying to think of a cat pun but I guess it’s not tabby.
a porcelain cat creamer
I usually use a couple of butter knives.
I was having better luck with it. It has stopped randomly diving back into what I’ve written so that I type broken sentences in the past, at least. I am old and crotchety, is all
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0" TITLE="Well, maybe not so random"Random Music Fridays you say?
These cat puns have me feline down.
well, at least you are not as down as this kitty
FYWP! and Preview too. Yes, I allcaps TITLE. I dunno why.
Random Music Fridays you say?
Canadian content.
Is not sufficient warning for the horrors contained.
Attempt to fool me once, shame on you. Attempt to fool me twice after you fucked up the first time, HAHAHA. Also.
The aunt is a trout?
I hear she’s an expert at fly fishing.
well, at least you are not as down as this kitty
Dead at 72-DDD.
BWAHAHAHAHA
LEAFS SUCKian content.
TGIF.
Random music, you say?
Warning: Irish content
Thread needs MOAR LEDERNACKEN!!!
Jesus. Someone give the hammies some sugar water.
CRANK THIS SHIT UP..
Obligatory, First we Take Manhattan
Let this make love sweet love to your earholes this fine Friday afternoon
Random music, eh? OK, crank this shit.
Obligatory, First we Take Manhattan
oh, i thought you were going to go with this obligatory reference
I thought The Origin of Love was the best song in Hedwig.
Spike Jones? I can’t stand the way he sings, but I love to hear him talk.
Wow, I was working on a synopsis here and all of a sudden these pirates crashed through the door and brutally sodomized me. Now I totes understand what the conservatards are talking about. It’s NO JOKE, PEOPLE.
I thought The Origin of Love was the best song in Hedwig.
Me too. Angry Inch just seemed a better fit with the previously posted vids.
The title of that Goldfrapp song put this in mah brain. I had no idea these guys were European- I always figured it was some NY or LA studio guy’s side project.
PM: A–HEM.
Interesting. I thought Cameron Mitchell had written the music for “Hedwig.” I guess this guy did. Damn decent glam-rock soundtrack. Damn decent.
The continuing story of Miles Cowperthwaite’s adventures aboard The Raging Queen:
PM: A-HEM.
You’ll get a sinus infection!
KISS.
KISS ARMY!!!!
True story: I was little…really little when KISS was in its heyday…and their album covers scared the shit out of me.
True story: I was little…really little when KISS was in its heyday…and their album covers scared the shit out of me.
And ever since then, you’ve been unable to use white pancake makeup?
Gee, who was the shadow?
It’s hard to indulge in my
clowngeisha fetish role-playing without it.I’m angling for an introduction to your hawt aunt
A Shel Silverstein poem, I just realized that it’s about D-KW:
A genuine anteater
The pet man told my dad
Turned out to be an aunt eater
And now my uncle’s mad
Now, I will head for Higher Ground
And ever since then, you’ve been unable to use white pancake makeup?
When I was a child I was forced to participate in an organization (which apparently still exists) called Clowns for Jesus. This, and not Steven King, is the reason that I am deathly afraid of pancake makeup to this very day.
Clowns win.
When I was a child I was forced to participate in an organization (which apparently still exists) called Clowns for Jesus.
Here in Florida we have Radical Homosexual Clowns. The balloon animal bit can be quite… educational.
Gee, who was the shadow?
Lamont Cranston. SASQ.
Oh, hey, bug,
It dawned on me yesterday that the anglebracketfail was due to the lack of a semicolon at the end of your ascii bits.
< = < with semicolon
< = < with…
etc.
Seems WP is picky like that while preview works from what your browser will see.
Yes, that’s what the kids are calling it these days.
Clowns for Jesus
i believe they are now called the moral majority…
Convenient but sadly, not nearly as tasty or nutritious.
Here in Florida we have Radical Homosexual Clowns. The balloon animal bit can be quite… educational.
Any relation to these folks?
Also, FYWP
Convenient but sadly, not nearly as tasty or nutritious.
i’m guessing they wouldn’t be as filling as the real deal…
Convenient but sadly, not nearly as tasty or nutritious.
also, i can imagine the momentary discomfiture at the first pro-life tea party they are served at…hmmmm, to eat the fetus or not eat the fetus…
Inquiring minds are wondering whether Fire in Cairo is a conservative song and therefore permissable to enjoy.
“i believe they are now called the moral majority…”
ZING!
ZING!
…thank you very much…i’ll be here all week!
Gay gay GAYE!
OT: Shorter Shrieking Harpy: We hate Egyptians for their freedom:
http://motherjones.com/mojo/2011/02/egypt-mubarak-ge ller-mosque-cpac
Can’t stand it? Love it.
Shorter Nymstradamus: I hate WP because I do:
http://motherjones.com/mojo/2011/02/egypt-mubarak-ge ller-mosque-cpac
You want this: http://motherjones.com/transition/inter.php?dest=http://motherjones.com/mojo/2011/02/egypt-mubarak-geller-mosque-cpac
also something very gay from nym’s link
Thanks Sub! Although “want” is overstating the case.
Oh my. Someone’s trying to de-Gellar herself through the use of surgery.
And note to Pam: that hairstyle is better-suited to steatopygian reality stars, not women in their 50’s.
“We are witnessing a complete seismic shift in the direction of the world away from freedom,”
so all the egyptians rejoicing in the streets are in for a big surprise?
And note to Pam: that hairstyle is better-suited to steatopygian reality stars, not women in their 50?s.
she is hoping to audtion for the ‘real housewives of sharia law’
We are witnessing a complete seismic shift in the direction of the world away from our freedom to dictate our will to brutally oppressed brown people.
Fqsd.
A Secret Life.
When I was a child I was forced to participate in an organization (which apparently still exists) called Clowns for Jesus.
OMG, me too. Thanks be to Blob the pastor leading the group at our church lost interest really quickly.
And on music, my current obsession. Good for a nice, slow V2 skate rhythm.
lack of a semicolon at the end of your ascii bits
Yea, I figured that out when creating a copyright symbol yesterday using the unicode conversion tool that you(?) linked to earlier, although I didn’t bookmark that here at home – link again pls?
vs sed: steatopygian
Seeing that word used does for my brain what PENIS does for my naughty bits. Long been one of my favorite obscure words.
:sı ʇı ǝɹǝɥ
http://mikezilla.com/exp0012.html
And on music, my current obsession.
What does it say that the entirety of Before and After Science is and always has been on my iPod?
Not so random, but very gay:
Jake, we miss ya man. :,|
Seeing that word used does for my brain what PENIS does for my naughty bits.
The word callipygous will do both.
Well it’s about fucking time.
And ecdysiast, also. Too.
The word callipygous will do both.
I can verify that.
Related.
Oh boy! Random Music Friday! The guys in the band want to expand our repetoire, so feed us some nifty stuff. We’re gonna listen to every single one all the way through.
Also, Joey don’t know shit about rap, but we’re gonna make him listen to it.
—–
News item: Switzerland has frozen Mubarak’s assets. He is reported to be worth about $70 Billion.
(Better: Mubarak has $70B. He’s only worth about 25 cents and 12 boxtops.)
“Seeing that word used does for my brain what PENIS does for my naughty bits.”
😉 I talk real gud some daze.
“We are witnessing a complete seismic shift in the direction of the world away from freedom,”
Well, corrupt, never elected in a free and fair election President formerly for life Mubarak will have a lot more free time for stuff now.
Perhaps Danny Elfman’s most underrated work.
Trivia: at 0:28 the guy on the left works in porn now. Up to his neck in it, in fact.
Go!
” Up to his neck in it, in fact.”
Doin’ it rong.
And ecdysiast, also. Too.
Well now, let me tell you a little story. I was in the green room pre Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me (courtesy the Ho who set up the event and was doing the introduction) when Roy Blount Jr. (who had just published or was just about to publish Alphabet Juice: The Energies, Gists, and Spirits of Letters, Words, and Combinations Thereof: Their Roots, Bones, Innards, Piths, Pips, and Secret Parts, Tinctures, Tonics, and Essences; With Examples of Their Usage Foul and Savory used the word in conversation. I don’t recall which other panelist asked “ecdysiast?” I promptly spelled it, spelling bee style. “It’s from Greek” I said. Roy looked at me and said that no, he was pretty sure it had Latin roots. “With a ‘y?” I asked incredulously. PWNED!
/auto_back_patting
What does it say that the entirety of Before and After Science is and always has been on my iPod?
Yeah, mine too – it’s pretty great.
Speaking of etymology, one of my favorite “big boy” words is “copacetic”. I’ve heard it in many contexts, usually from someone who expects you to be impressed cuz it sounds all Latin ‘n shit. In fact it is slang of African American origin.
Hipsters doing country music.
Music, hah! As I type I am listening not to your pre-recorded pre-fab yada but a schoolchild (I assume) somewhere in the outside world practicing the violin.
iTunes Random Selection: Buffalo Daughter
Speaking of callipygous…
Orrin Hatch is deeply sorry for trying to avert total economic collapse, and would vote differently if given the chance, assuming that his vote would not change the outcome.
Tony Levin is my favorite bassist, and this album scorches.
When I was a child I was forced to participate in an organization (which apparently still exists) called Clowns for Jesus.
Whoa, you were a Juggalo?
Strippers.
At last I am part of the machinery.
Ecdysozoa (pronounced /??kd?s??zo?.?/) is a group of protostome animals,… They were first defined …, based mainly on trees constructed using 18S ribosomal RNA genes.18S ribosomal RNA genes
Fucking 18S ribosomal genes, how do they work?
More random itunes: Laurie Anderson, Blue Lagoon from Mister Heartbreak.
Yay Laurie Anderson.
Strippers.
Waterbears for the win!
For Friday random music, it’s gotta be Lougah François
feel the cut of THE KNIFE!!!!I always thought the guitarist they brought in to play on this album was amazing.
Orrin Hatch is deeply sorry for trying to avert total economic collapse, and would vote differently if given the chance, assuming that his vote would not change the outcome.
I imagine that “buyers’ remorse” for funding the Tea Party is setting in among the GOP establishment. Fucking fuckers are fucking fucked!
Whoa, you were a Juggalo?
HAH! I never heard about this, but there was a kid in my Christian youth group who was really into ICP. Why does the Guardian have such a hard time reconciling Evangelical beliefs with violence and misogyny? It’s like wondering how a person could be both racist and Republican.
Someone Keeps Moving My Chair
(I resisted the temptation to override the shuffle and choose “Particle Man” instead.)
I think the writer’s having fun making ICP try to justify it. It’s a classic.
Also, four Sydneysiders and a regrettable trip to the hairdresser.
There is a reason why Jodi Phyllis always looks at the camera straight on. Which reminds me of a comedienne I heard recently:
‘Yeah, I’m a quarter jewish. Check the nose. Some people say I look like a young Anne Frank.. Not there was an old Anne Frank.’
“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?”
Not the best move Anne Frank ever made.
Skid Row.
Sorry, no more Anne Frank jokes, I promise. You’d think I’d learn after the abortion jokes landed like a dead baby.
Waterbears for the win!
Right number of legs, but somehow I was expecting Sleipner to be larger.
Wait. We’re supposed to be linking wev our iTunes shuffles up? Okay, but don’t larf at my derivative musical tastes too hard – it was tough finding a YouTube link for this one.
No joking, this was next.
We were pickin’ mangoes,
For Tintin’s fandangoes,
When I picked a blushing bride!
Boo hoo, no Quickspace video for Munchers No Munchers.
Right number of legs, but somehow I was expecting Sleipner to be larger.
Odin is real, real small. The Jotuns? Each one could fit in a demitasse cup- some giants.
There is a reason why Jodi Phyllis always looks at the camera straight on.
I thought it was because of the Parasaurolophian crest on the back of her noggin.
DK-W, I can see you liking this chick…and, you know, thinking she’s hot. And wanting to do her. And her mother.
This thread needs moar Megalodon!
Yeah, but can you say that in Klingon?
Megalodon –
Ok
“[Blood and Pain will rule the day]”
Hercule’s on the rag.
Mastodon toured with Dethklok.
And now the conclusion of Chapter Two of The Adventures of Miles Cowperthwaite, in which his time aboard The Raging Queen comes to an end:
Tampa and Maceo
“[Blood and Pain will rule the day]”
Skipping over the screed, I saw this as “Blood and Palin will rule the day”.
LEAVE HERCULE TRIG SAVINIEN ALONE!!!!
Might one proffer ones grateful thanks for the adventures of Miles Cowperthwaite? They have been of much comfort to me in a unsettled period of hour changes.
HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVARIN demands a fine cup of coffee.
They have been of much comfort to me in a unsettled period of hour changes.
This is only as it should be, for if The Adventures of Miles Cowperthwaite is about anything, it’s about being comforted. Over, and over, and over again, in a completely manly, masculine way.
Someone needs to bring some class into this.
HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVARIN demands a fine cup of coffee.
Linky no worky. Broke.
Fear is the key, innit?
Someone needs to bring some class into this.
I can vouch for her man. He’s very handy.
DK-W, I can see you liking this chick…and, you know, thinking she’s hot. And wanting to do her. And her mother.
Just got back from being in my bunk, did I miss anything?
Linky no worky. Broke.
It was just the dapper, Panama hatted Savarin coffee d00d.
Savarin Man is no Suntory Coffee Boss, though.
Savarin Man is no Suntory Coffee Boss, though.
That is a wonderful logo. I followed the words around many times, expecting it to say something more.
Or is it… Boss Coffee?
That is a wonderful logo. I followed the words around many times, expecting it to say something more.
That’s how the Boss sucks you in… NOW GET TO WORK!!!
Or is it… Boss Coffee?
Well, IT is Boss Coffee.
HE is Coffee Boss.
Not one of my top blues icons, but certainly one of the most memorable blues tunes…and this one IMHO is the best version.
You know who else is into the blues?
Yo momma.
Random.
Via the good Roger Ailes a crazy thing.
In re: *The United Federation of Desert [Utah, Colorado, Arizona, New Mexico, Idaho, united under the aegis of the Mormon Church]
Listen you obese, flatulent douchenozzle, it’s Deseret, there’s another fucking E between the R & the T! If you’re going to spam bullshit, at least take the time to understand what the fuck you are talking about!
Hey, you know what would be really awesome?
If Tampa would schedule the Gay Buccaneer festival next year to coincide with the RNC convention.
Just catching up on Around The Net, and OMG Wednesday’s was AWESOME. It had both POOP and PENIS.
I rate for the United Federation of Dessert- they got these pies…
If Tampa would schedule the Gay Buccaneer festival next year to coincide with the RNC convention.
A toe-tappin’ good time. I’m sure this guy would make the drive.
OMG. *spoiler alert*
That woman was eating her own poo?
I prolly could have gone my whole life without seeing that…
I see that Carey whatsit that Roger Ailes (the good one) links to has the NZ Climate Scientists admit to faking results bollocks, there. Hot Topic explained the real story at the time as I believe some other Blogs of Note did.
It seems that the festering pile of rotting dingo kidneys is still making the denialist rounds though. They are the victims here, people!!
Via the good Roger Ailes a crazy thing.
Much crazy indeed, but this:
Sadly, no. In fact, the reverse of true on several levels. First, Marx felt that peasants were incapable of revolution until after they had been proletarianized. He also limited his theory to work in the “public sphere”. Women didn’t factor until they were tapped* as a source of reserve labor, after work had become so deskilled that even a woman could do it. The reduction of fathers, mothers, daughters, etc., to sexless, interchangeable workers was identified as a degrading aspect of capitalism, although also as a cause of the coming revolution that would result in equality.
Engels wrote a bit more about the links between patriarchy and private property and theorized that the abolition of property would also result in equality between the sexes. But even then in it was peasant->proletarian->revolution->equality, not peasant women overthrowing their husbands. Marxist feminism didn’t come along until the 70s.
In these times of Tyranny, my Own Doctor [part of the Conspiracy] has attempted to Force me to take Medication based upon a Zionist medical text that suggests I am [viz] DSM-IV 297.1 (grandiose subtype) when of course I’m actually Tusk Matterhorn, Secret Agent and Master of Many Skillz. THIS AGGRESSION SHALL NOT STAND.
* aw yeah
This just in Even more fuckingfuckheaded.
It’s just numbers what the fuck? I gotz an audience yaknow
The solution, of course, was to embolden the ladies to cast off their conjugal oppressors.
The safe word is “kolkhoznik”.
Random Access Music Friday.
The safe word is “kolkhoznik”.
CACAO!
Well contributions from here seem to be disappearing to Egypt
If Tampa would schedule the Gay Buccaneer festival next year to coincide with the RNC convention.
I think there would be considerable overlap between those two events.
L-o-n-g comment on the tunes. Do you realize we’ve only worked down to the ‘Oh Boy! Random Music Friday!’ comment? Lord, people, we’re trying.
I’m s-o-o far behind on the music. I could be at this until the wee hours of the morning. Have some mercy on me! Can you talk about politics or mock reichwing idiots or something?
Gonna make some coffee and take an Egypt break. I’m still wired into it.
Rampant, heh, political correctness
I could be at this until the wee hours of the morning. Have some mercy on me! Can you talk about politics or mock reichwing idiots or something?
Gonna make some coffee and take an Egypt break. I’m still wired into it.
BLOGGER! I say it at vs’ place, and I’m saying it again. START WRITING!!! You’ve been closely following developments in Egypt since the popular uprising started, now get cracking, lad!
Young Egyptian Google executive sparks low budget revolution using a laptop and a social networking service, and stands in stark and ironic contrast to George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld, Paul Wolfowitz, David Addington, Richard Perle, Condoleezza Rice, and a host of other Neocons, who with several trillion dollars, more than 4500 U.S. soldiers killed, and perhaps 100,000 Iraqis dead, only managed to create the worst foreign policy clusterfuck in U.S. history.
Well, the young Egyptian Google executive actually wanted the population to be free.
Additionally, he’s not a sociopath who is willing to immolate hundreds of thousands of innocent people to line his pockets.
“Do no evil”, indeed.
Mr. Bastard is right Pirate guy. Blogeroo is for you
Mr Great Cornholio, You might enjoy reading “The Family”.
Rampant, heh, political correctness
Yeah, actually, you DO have to change your value system. First, white culture is not neutral, it is a set of values that comes out of the experience of being white in America. Even organizations explicitly devoted to anti-racism work often have to assess whether they are working for white liberals or for actual people of color. Second, and it’s a BIG second, racism has been the keystone of the Republican electoral strategy for fifty fucking years.
It amazes me that Republicans think that they can just wait around for non-white people with their values to come along. And when a few token politicians of color do bite, the GOP can’t figure out why brown people don’t turn out in droves to vote for them.
*never gets old
First, white culture is not neutral, it is a set of values that comes out of the experience of being white in America.
As a straight, white, middle-class, educated male, I have to say that my ilk has a hard time realizing that straight, white, middle-class, educated male is not the “default setting” for everyone. Some of us discover this, and work to break out of these cultural blinders, others just go on making assumptions about the minority experience, and bitch about how liberal policies oppress them, while voting for fat cats who really do keep them down.
HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVARIN demands a fine cup of coffee.
Who does he think he is? Ziltoid the Omniscient or something?
Who does he think he is? Ziltoid the Omniscient or something?
I predict that that song will become popular at weddings within the next four or five years.
Simply can’t keep up. Ralph is getting cranky, which is usual for him. And Joey wants to toss some things into the mix. So the band is more or less giving up. There has been a TON of music in the thread–going all the way back to Blues links.
The guys are going to take off the headphones now and rummage around for some contributions to Friday Random Music. Perhaps we’ll put the headphones on again in the wee small hours of the morning….
Kiwi & B^4: Thanks for the encouragement! It’s having some effect, too. I’m actually starting to believe that maybe I could do this. T&U taking the plunge has been a good example. Maybe it’s my Luddite fears of the Internets Toobz. Or looking like a Total Idiot. (Low self-esteem, folks. Hell, I’ve never even submitted any of fiction anywhere.) So I dunno.
I don’t have a job–Social Security ruled me Complete Disability–except for my fiction. (I work at that, fer sure.) So I could probably put up some fresh content fairly often. But it would certainly be Very Weird content. All over the map.
Again, thanks. I’ll cogitate on it.
Snidely/Lurkers/Ice9, did you get the hint that you’ve got to start blogging? You’ve got a lot of life experience, and you’ve been on top of developments in Egypt since they started. You have indicated that you are a writer, man.
Make it happen.
Oh, and here’s some Egyptian pop music for you.
Guitar as a rhythm instrument. Plus she’s totally HAWT. And she’s got fingers of steel. Watch full screen.
Fail! (See why I’m reluctant to blog?) Link:
Honestly, setting up the blog is a piece of piss (is very easy). Posting is the hard bit. I’m sure you could do 3 stories a week to keep it going. As Mr. Bastard said, your interest in Egypt marks you out as someone who can take the time to do a good job. Also some blogs just make stuff up. No names. They know who they are. Damn Kiwis.
Thanks for the link, you wonderful Bastard!
Before I look for one more cut, I wonder where bilo has been? Seems he hasn’t been around in week or so. Off hunting Sasquatch? Anyone know?
Lurkers: Terry Bozzio was the drummer in the Levin link. I can’t point to just one drummer and call him my favorite, but Bozzio is up at the top.
Yes, that Bozzio
Hey HERCULE TRIATHLON SAVINIEN, I hear that several people at balloon juice are saying that Hillary is teh awesomest and so are the Jooos. They are about to talk smack about your moms also. Be a man and go play over there. Shoo!
(potential preemptive apology to John Cole inserted here)
As a straight, white, middle-class, educated male, I have to say that my ilk has a hard time realizing that straight, white, middle-class, educated male is not the “default setting” for everyone.
Sure, but those of us in the Gooper camp figure that hey, they’re the majority (or the Real America or whatever) so everyone else should just adjust to them. And since there’s no comparable monolith on the other side, they get their way very often.
That’s why I think the best thing the Latino demographic could do as it grows is to refuse to assimilate (by the GOP’s definition of “assimilate”). I’d kind of like someone to break the self-proclaimed Real Americans’ privileged status in politics.
For all the S,N wimmins
And you know who I’d like to see take up blogging?
Chris.
here’s some Egyptian pop music for you.
Yay! Kohl eyes and bootie shaking, hard to go wrong with those. Thx!
And we’re caught up!
Speaking for all us, the guys in the band really enjoyed Random Music Friday! We gotta come up with name! This What’s Today’s Name rigamorole is driving me nuts.
Hey, maybe that would work: What’s Today’s Name? Oh, fuck you, Ralph. Nothin’ is good enough for you.
And FYWP. (Hey, maybe thatcould work! Sorta like INXS….)
More jokey metal.
Joey fucked up bigtime. That stoner forget to run an ENTIRE audition tape. (Now I sorta miss Eddie, our former engineer. Even if he was a pissant.) Anyway, here’s the rest:
So it’s flippin’ 5 AM in Baltimore. Sorta figured this would happen. Thanks to all for Random Music Friday. We’ll get the name sorted out eventually. We might have to get rid of Ralph first.
MB: Just saw it before I turned the machine off.
Willya just shut up, Joey?
I prefer to think of him as this Bozzio.
That Bozzio is Dale, his (then) wife.
Glasgow Rangers fandom included?
only the pre-Souness sect.
Terry is back there on drums. His drumwork is what makes Missing Persons’ hits timeless.
Nice link, thanks! I was disappointed none of my Zappa came up in the shuffle yesterday.
How can we get God to disclose the secret location the Homo Pirates whisk their victims away to? Sounds hot!