Best New Comment Thingy Game EVAR
Posted on February 2nd, 2011 by D. Aristophanes
Let’s shamelessly steal Roy’s comment game based on this ridiculous drivel from NRO’s Michael Walsh:
Anyway, when you look at the course of revolution in the modern era, it’s always the same-old same-old:
* Czar Nicky — Kerensky — Lenin
* Kaiser Willie — Weimar Republic — Hitler
* Shah Pahlavi — Mr. Bani Sadr — Khomeini
Here are a few examples to start us off:
Frankie Roosevelt — Jameson Carter — Barrold Obama
Maria Anna Schicklgruber — Alois Hitler — Hitler
The Gilgameshinator — King Hank the VIII — Joey Stalin
Hitler — ‘Worse Than’ — Glenn Greenwald
Sojourner Truth — Civil War — White Chicks
Tamerlane — Fred Basset — Barcodes
Yesterday — Last Week — The Day After Tomorrow
Socrates-William Gladstone-Michael Walsh
All In The Family — The Jeffersons — The Jeffersons On Ice
Barack!
Barack! Barack! Bo! Barack!
Bananafana Fo Farack!
Fee My Mo Marack!
Barack!
Michael Walsh – Adam Walsh – Etan Patz
DKW’s Mom — Last Night — Good Times
DA – Tintin – Gavin
😛
Steam engines — electric engines — cold fusion
Lester Young -> Bird -> Kenny G
Me — Mrs. __B — Mini__B
Etan Patz
Now THERE’S a name I haven’t heard in a long time…
Mary Magdalen – your favorite 17th Century courtesan – Megan Marshack
Frank Sinatra — Bo Diddly — Vanilla Ice
Steam Punk – Barry Manilow – Pomlamoose
Nice to know that he’s on a nickname-basis with some of history’s leaders.
Jesus — the Pope — child molestation jokes
William Harrison – James Garfield – George W Bush
Vladimir Putin – Sarah Palin – John Edwards
Barry Goldwater — Sarah Palin — Oh, Fuck.
Pliny the Younger — Potsie Weber — Pol Pot
Sean Connery – Roger Moore – Timothy Dalton
Igglybuff – Jigglypuff – Wigglytuff
Your mom – me – your friend’s mom
Light Horse Harry Lee — Robert E. Lee — The General Lee
Pedantic note: when he sez ‘Weimar Republic’ he means Stresemann.
Johnny Unitas — Joe Montana — Tom Brady’s hair
Marie Antoinette — Little Lord Fauntleroy — Megan McArdle
Steal underpants – ??? – PROFIT!
black people -> womynz -> buttsex
Post — Comment — HITLER
Pedantic note: when he sez ‘Weimar Republic’ he means Stresemann.
He’s concerned with the grand sweeping narrative, not petty little facts.
What IS this? It looks like especially abstruse Emily Dickinson poetry.
Lucille Goldberg — genetic mutation — Jonah Goldberg
The Spanish Inquisition – The Holocaust – Saying mean things about Sarah Palin
DKW – vs – Cthuhulu
Hitler — Hitler — HITLER
DKW – DKW’s mom – Trig
Ho — Ho — Ho
50’s society – abortion – 9/11
No posts in the last 24 hours — “You are posting comments too quickly. Slow down.” –FYWP
Righteous Bubba – Zorbs – Substance McGravitas
~
T&U – WP – FYWP
quill pens – typewriters – wordpress
typewriters – Hitler – wordpress
~
P T Barnum – Pat Robertson – Rapture
Damn it T&U. I was going for
Ignorant Panic — Ex-Lax — Jonah Goldberg
Word processors – WordPress – SWEARING
classical music – the beatles – creed
Winston Churchill – Rocky Balboa – Marilyn Manson
classical music – the beatles – creed
GASP!
How DARE you!
Karl Benz –> Henry Ford –> Ferdinand Porsche
To really end in Hell this should then go to Joseph Lucas, “Prince of Darkness”
Father Coughlin — Glenn Beck — OLIGARHY
Sherlock Holmes – Hemlock Stones – Gregory House
Ignorant Panic — Ex-Lax — Jonah Goldberg
Oooh, that’s a good one, too.
Ignorant stupidity — bullshit — Liberal Fascism
Aristophanes goes for the win:
Betty — Veronica — Jughead
Franz Ferdinand — Franzia — Franz Ferdinand the band
Heh — Indeed — Lileks has more
Franz Ferdinand — Franzia — Franz Ferdinand the band
splendid
Throwing Christians to the lions – Slavery – High capacity magazine ban
Little Nemo –> Popeye –> Garfield
Cheesecake — Twinkies — Pop Rocks
Johann Sebastian Bach – Sebastian Bach – Axl Rose
Nooners — Dolphins — Jesus
Ayn Rand — Sammich — Daffyd ab Hugh
Pop Rocks — Pepsi — Exploding Stomach
Little Green Footballs – Balloon Juice – Media Matters
Crooks & Liars – Sadly, No! – FOX News
splendid
Thanks!
Eggs — bacon — fuck yeah
Father – Son – What I’d really like Dad is to borrow the car keys, see you later can I have them please?
Jethro Bodine – Isaac Asimov – Bob Owens
Dragon — King — Wangchuck
hieroglyphics – ENIAC – Facebook
~
Payday — Bar — Insufficient Funds
Folk song that T&U doesn’t mind — Ugly Kid Joe — folk song cover T&U hates
Beer — Just a tonic, thanks, I’m resting my liver — AKVAVIT
Jethro Bodine – Isaac Asimov – Bob Owens
Hurricane — greeyull — comedy gold
Second Amendment – Fourteenth Amendment – New Black Panther
John Boehner — Affair with hung dude — Goatse
Jesus — Massive Head Injury — J. Grant Swank Jr.
Wetsuit — Dildo — Another Wetsuit
Conservative bloggers — Cheetos — but I repeat myself
single – open up your heart – WHO ATE ALL MY CHEESY POOFS?!
One — Three — Milk
John Birch Society — lead paint — Townhall
Jesus – Mary – Joseph
Barbra Streisand – Taylor Dane – Celine Dion
Hit — Ler — Stalin
This guy — That guy — The other guy
Payday — Bar — Insufficient Funds
This took me a minute, by the way. I thought you were talking about the candy bar, and I was like, “Damn, he must really like nuts.”
The – Fact – Is
“Damn, he must really like nuts.” — A moment — Joke
Zombie – Jabba the Hutt – Jonah Goldberg
Youtube – MST3K – Unemployed
Ralph Waldo Emerson — Greg Lake — Arnold Palmer
* Czar Nicky — Lenin — Reagan BOOYAH
* Kaiser Willie — Hitler — OMG did Bush just give her a backrub
* Shah Pahlavi — Hey wasn’t he an ally — REAGAN AGAIN
Also:
* King George — George Washington — George W Bush
Gary Ruppert – He Who Must Not Be Named (only because the Sadly, Nauts have blocked any reference to jester-like characters) – Troofie
Hitler — a man a plan a canal panama — reltiH
Jimi Hendrix – Lenny Kravitz – Cee Lo
Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – MUSHROOOM!
T&U — drunk — only allowed plastic cups from here on out
Hear no evil – Speak no evil – Richard Nixon
Lysistrata — Barbra Streisand — Sarah Palin
I Love Lucy — The Love Boat — Everybody Loves Raymond
Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – Badger – MUSHROOOM!
Worst soup recipe EVER!
Eleanor Roosevelt – Hillary Clinton – Michele Bachmann
DKW’s mom — sequined thong — nightmares
Oscar Wilde — Hitler — gay marriage
Charlie Chaplin — Charlie Callas — Charlie Sheen
Campbell’s Soup – Rice-A-Roni – Ramen
DKW’s mom — sequined thong — nightmares
AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Worst soup recipe EVER!
At the risk of Godwinning the thread, NO SOUP FOR YOU!
Jefferson Airplane — Jefferson Starship — Starship
John Wayne – Carol Wayne – Victoria Jackson
Cool Hand Luke — Jailhouse Rock — Chained Heat
At the risk of Godwinning the thread
You know who else liked to tangle up string?
Jefferson Airplane — Jefferson Starship — Starship
Rich Lowry – Sarah, Sarah – Starbursts are brewing in your eyes
Jefferson Airplane — Jefferson Starship — Starship
You’re a cruel, cruel woman. Have you considered entering the vast librarian/dominatrix field of employment?
The Cheshire Cat — Garfield — Kitler
Godzilla — Dino — Barney
Death Star – Mr Potato Head – SDI
You know who else liked to tangle up string?
KITLER THAT’S WHO
Have you considered entering the vast librarian/dominatrix field of employment?
Oh, yeah. I’ve even had cards printed up.
I’ve even had cards printed up.
Scratch and
sniffbleed?Linda Blair – Tony Blair – Kathryn Jean Lopez
Madonna – RuPaul – Lady Gaga
Star Wars – Two decades of merchandising – Jar Jar
Colossus — Hal 9000 — Windows
Know-Nothings – Teabaggers – Sack-o-Hammers Party
Krazy Kat-Calvin and Hobbes-Marmaduke
Will Rogers – Mr. Rogers – Kenny Rogers
Scratch and
sniffbleed?Yes. I also have all of my implements classified by the Library of Congress system.
Frederick Opper – Herblock – Michael Ramirez
Colossus — Hal 9000 — Windows
For – The – Win
. I also have all of my implements classified by the Library of Congress system.
Damn. I’ve never understood that.
Daffy Duck – Doonesbury – Mallard Fillmore
Mellotron – Drum Machine -Autotune
Mallard Filmore — funny — alternate universe
Upton Sinclair – Woodward & Bernstein – James O’Keefe
My pants are off — What are you wearing? — Are you there?
to amend the above:
rich lowry-sarah palin–millions of potential rich lowrys cleaned up by a tissue
also
schnitzle–spaetzel–hitler
and
chambermaid–chamberlain–chamberpot–hitler
Shakespeare — Michelangelo — Bil Keane
Theremon – Positron – Autotune
Trek — Wars — Gate
GACK!
Damn you, Spag!
Johnny Carson – Jay Leno – Dane Cook
Holy fucking shit. Tell a working artist there’s a new thread, willya?
Rock – Scissors – Goldberg
Jeez, vs, we’re only 140 comments in!
Casual racism — Soliosis fetish — Day by Day cartoon by Chris Muir
Karl Marx – Marks and Spencer – WalMart
Tolkein- Terry Goodkind – Stephanie Meyer.
Betty Boop – Judy Holliday – Sarah Palin
Holy fucking shit. Tell a working artist there’s a new thread, willya?
There’s a new thread.
Movie set in Arkansas – But filmed in Toronto – Named after some other place
At the risk of sounding like a complete moron (because I never do anything halfway) is it just supposed to be a one-thing-leading-to-other thing only ridiculous?
Lucianne Goldberg—A Rube Goldberg Contraption—Jonah Goldberg
Walsh thinks modern revolutions proceed to despotism. Everyone else is funnier.
Whole-wheat lasagna with organic tomatoes and garlic sauce – boiled fettucini with store-bought romano cheese – Kraft Mac’n’Cheese
Salt – Tequila – Lime
That Was The Week That Was – SNL Weekend Update – Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me!
Representational art — abstract impressionism — manga
Dammit! I thought of a really good one while peeing and now I’m coming up short!
is it just supposed to be a one-thing-leading-to-other thing only ridiculous?
“Classic” would be
Bad but tolerable – seemingly better – intolerably bad
each leading to the other (or at least following each other chronologically)
Of course, we can’t be arsed to play by the rules.
Warren Court – Burger Court – Roberts Court
Limericks with bad meter – Haiku with no kigo – The lyrics to Like a G6
Seduction — virgins — sex tape machine
Immaculate Reception – Bills lose 4 Super Bowls in a Row – Nipplegate.
KKK – John Birchers – Teabaggers
Y A Tittle – Dan Marino – Ben Roethlisberger
Humphrey Bogart – Dennis Hopper – Mark Wahlberg.
Liberace – Rock Hudson – John Boehner
(HA! That was the one!)
Do what they say – Say what you mean – One thing leads to another
WFL – USFL – XFL
Slavery — Jim Crow — Barack Obama
Ow I think I broked my brane.
John Derbyshire — Lolita — “I’m sorry, sir, but you’ll have to pay to replace this book.”
Hampster Dance – Lolcats – Fred Figglehorn
Mad Magazine – Crack’d – The Weekly Standard
Marquis de Sade – Aleister Crowley – John Derbyshire
V – W – xXx
Jim Crow – Sheryl Crow – Monica Crowley
Father Coughlin – William F. Buckley – “Little” Billy Kristol
Moe Gandhi -> Marty Luther King -> Glenn Beck
Smurfs – Teletubbies – Boohbahs
Mad Magazine – Crack’d – The Weekly Standard
lulz
Huey Long – George Wallace – Rick Perry
Addy Hitler – Joey Stalin – Newty Gingrich
Awshit. This aint the kind of thread to be jumping into late. You fuckers.
Dick Cheney — heart removal — Dick Cheney
rofl…ewwwww
Also, the Weimar Republic didn’t really come out of a revolution as such, did it?
Zep — Bobby Plant and the Honeydrippers — Priory of Bri
VPR – VMR – VER
Dammit! I thought of a really good one while peeing and now I’m coming up short!
That’s better than coming up short while peeing and thinking of a really good one now.
Beginning – Middle – Hitler
*whispers* thanks to Subby and pedestrian. Still not seeing a distinct pattern. *backs quietly out of thread*
VPR – VMR – VER
Interest! – Newsletter? – Website?
Kitler — Bonsai Kitten — some joke about Axis Powers than I can’t quite figure out
Steve Reeves – Christopher Reeves – Keanu Reeves
(also James Dean – Sylvester Stallone – Nicholas Cage)
Kennedy/Monroe – Clinton/Lewinsky – Bush/Saudi Arabian Royal Family
Worse than a thousand Hitlers – Worse than a hundred Hitlers – Worse than algore
British Empire – Soviet Empire – Empire of the Senseless
Awshit. This aint the kind of thread to be jumping into late.
You fuckers — you fuckees — you fucked
Spaghetti Lee – Wasting Time – Sense of non-fulfillment at end of day.
Kitler — Bonsai Kitten — some joke about Axis Powers than I can’t quite figure out
Hmmmmmmmmmm…
Maybe…
Kitler — Bonsai Kitten — Ayatollah Kitmani?
Dracula – Interview with the Vampire – Twilight
You know who else liked to draw specious connections?
Lesley Gore—-Al Gore—The Saw Franchise
The Legend of Sleepy Hollow – Casper, the Friendly Ghost – Ann Coulter
There needs to be some corollary of Godwin’s Law that covers KITLER.
Silvio Berluskitty.
Al Gore – Michael Moore – someone Most
W–VodkaPretzels–Faceplant.
Kitty Amin
Silvio Berluskitty
That’s the girlfriend’s nickname.
Louis XVI – Robespierre – BLOODY ARROGANT FRENCH BASTARDS
Groucho Marx – Karl Marx – Zeppo Marx
You know who else liked to draw specious connections?
Charles Darwin!!
Karl Marx—Groucho Marx—Richard Marx
Nixon: “I’m not a crook” – Clinton: “I did not have sex” – Bush: “What? Me worry?”
Moammar Cathafi
Kitler — Bonsai Kitten — some joke about Axis Powers than I can’t quite figure out
Kitler –Bonsai Kitten — Manxollini
Pussolini?
Dinosaurs — morons — missionary lizards
Missionary lizards — learning to play guitar — my new band name
There’s a woman who knows/All that glitters is gold – With the lights out, it’s less dangerous/here we are now, entertain us – Baby Baby Baby Oooooh
Thesis – Antithesis – Synthesis
FYWP
There’s a woman who knows/All that glitters is gold – With the lights out, it’s less dangerous/here we are now, entertain us – Baby Baby Baby Oooooh
You realize that’s a circular reference, and so could work with any starting or stopping point?
Monty Python – Kids In the Hall – FOX News
Lets pretend that “Vodka” is struck through and give a hearty FU to WordPress.
Cat Jong Il
Lenin – Stalin – Limbaugh
Tora! Tora! Tora!
Ivan’s been a Terrible kitty, yes you have – coo coo coo
Solar System – Binary Star – HOLY SHIT!
You realize that’s a circular reference, and so could work with any starting or stopping point?
To seem smart, I’ll pretend I did that on purpose.
Idi Amin — Babar — Nelson Mandela
AC/DC – Pantera – Mikail Gorbachev
Godzilla–Gamera–Pikachu
Gram Parsons – The Dixie Chicks – Toby Keith
Archie and Mehitabel — Family Circus — Day By Day
Romulus & Remus – Mowgli – Megadeth
ftfy
Monty Python – Weird Al -YouTube
Warren Court – Food Court – Roberts Court
Y’know, this does work better…
Gomulka — Walesa — Mazowicki
I calls ’em like I sees ’em
Kimchi – Bibimbap – teh lunch bill
Boggis — Bunce — Bean
Spike Jones – Al Yankovic – Tenacious D
Will Rogers – Mr. Rogers – Kenny Rogers
Ginger Rogers- Roy Rogers- Hedgecock Rogers
The Bible — Quiverfulls — prolapsed uterus
70’s Michael Jackson – 80’s Michael Jackson – 90’s Michael Jackson
Danzig- Shakira- Hilarity
Rusted Root – The Roots – Megan Kelly
Rigorous exercise program – occasional jog – sleeping ’til noon.
Smoke Signals – Semaphore – Twitter
Snow day — hot toddy — nap
Tri-weekly – try weekly – try weakly
The French- Fags- Both
Jack Lalanne – Jane Fonda – Richard Simmons
Bookmark- This- Libs!
The internet — ADHD — “Mom, can I come live with you?”
Sasquatch — Is — Real
Ricky Ricardo – Ritchie Valens – Ricky Martin
Iron Eyes Cody – Crying Eagle – John Boehner
Awshit. This aint the kind of thread to be jumping into late. You fuckers
ditto
Edmund Burke – Anthony Comstock – Ross Douthat
glenn beck — sarah palin — giant black hole of stupidity
David Brooks — salad bar at Applebee’s — go home hungry
POOP — Jonah Goldberg — PENIS
Schopenhauer – Eisenhower – Jack Bauer
Danzig- Shakira- Hilarity
Best. Mash-up. EVAR!
Buck Leonard – Buck Cherry – Buck off!
Jesus – Pope John Paul II – the Anchoress
Karl Manx– Bertrand Russian Blue – Himalayn Rand
The Spanish Inquisition – The McCarthy Hearings – Michelle Malkin
The Illuminati – Reptoids- Koch Brothers
Maine Coon – Egyptian MauMau – Russian Jew
INTEREST.
Joseph Smith – Brigham Young – Mitt Romney
Peoples Temple at Jonestown – Branch Davidians – Glenn Beck’s audience
BTW…I get it now. (I swear!) I’m just in a groove, art-wise.
This Modern World – Subnormality – Better Days
Boggis — Bunce — Bean
I swoon.
Anakin Skywalker – Luke Skywalker – Star Wars fans cosplaying Skywalkers
VS — T&U — BOOBIES!!!
I get it now. (I swear!) I’m just in a groove, art-wise.
I don’t think there was ever an “it” to “get”. Just random hilarity.
And this thread is what took me out of a groove, art-wise. I managed to draw a whole torso before I found my daily distraction.
Satan – Cthulhu – Rush Limbaugh
You got a torso? I only drew an arm.
Some people have all the luck …
**shoves hands in pockets, kicks at ground**
Starbursts — Rich Lowry — new pants
The Wheel – The Internet – Baconaise
shirley temple–roy rogers–teetotallers
Jeffrey Dahmer – Hannibal Lecter – Paula Deen
LOLcats – Walrus Bukkit – Don Surber in lingerie
Drawing a whole torso – drawing a whole arm – sitting on ass in front of fireplace youtube surfing
Bert- Evil Bert- Peter Orszag
Catholics – Lutherans – Baptists
Funny, I don’t feel any better.
Da Vinci – Warhol – Kinkade
Mary Magdalen – Mary Matalin – Megyn Kelly
Foxy Brown- Dan Brown- Doo Doo Brown
SDS – SLA – NOM
Pope Urban II- Pope Urban III- Pope Urban Dictionary
Aloha! – Ola! – Papers, please!
Sha- Na- Na
I’m trying NOT to get out of the groove. S,N is like frickin’ catnip to me.
Johnny- Joey- Dee Dee
Pope John Paul – Pope John Paul II – Pope John Paul George and Ringo
Knock knock – Who’s there ? – The Spanish Inquisition
Thank you – You’re welcome – The Spanish Inquisition
Paper – Plastic – The Spanish Inquisition
Breakfast – Lunch – The Spanish Inquisition
The Holy Grail – No thanks, we’ve already got one – The Spanish Inquisition
Da Vinci – Warhol – Kinkade
Rueben Kincaid- Thomas Kinkade- Hideous Kinkade
Paper- Plastic- Bertrand
Alpha male – Alpha and Omega – Alfalfa sprouts
Peter Paul Rubens – Paul Reubens – Ruben Sandwich – Ruben Studdard
Paper- Plastic- Bertrand
Ca plane boite c’est moi
Oral sex — anal sex — yiffing
Sex with actor’s mom – horrifying infectious diseases – sex with actor’s mom again
Mickey Kaus — Fucking a goat — Ann Althouse
Cute little kitties – catnip – crystal meth
Hyperbole — McCarthyism — Frank Gaffney
Sex with actor’s mom – horrifying infectious diseases – sex with actor’s mom again
Really? You think sloppy seconds is worse? Cuz that’s not what I’ve exp– I mean, YOU’RE MOM’S THE WHORE!
Cute little kitties – catnip – crystal meth
Catnap- Catnip- Catnups
The Battle of Hastings – The Battle of Gettysburg – a woman in a parking garage with only a ten round clip instead of fifteen
Mickey Mouse – Mickey Kaus – Andrew Breitbart
Rueben Kincaid- Thomas Kinkade- Hideous Kinkade
i snorted…out loud…
Sarah Palin — lost glasses — worse than what happened to Oedipus
me–office full of fundraiser chocolates–diabetic coma
Ooh, you people are so funny.
Catnap- Catnip- Catnups
That made me laff extra-much.
Snow – Ice – OMFG!
Wall Street — K Street — Skid Row
Civil Unions – Gay Marriage – Santorum’s dog
FYWP — FYWP with a rake — FYWP with a rusty garden weasel
The Black Plague — The Holocaust — Raising the top marginal tax rate a couple of points
Snow – Ice – OMFG!
LULZ!
Without teh funnay,
http://thinkprogress.org/2011/02/02/gaffney-muslim-brother/
Stylus – WP – blink once for yes
Human Rights – Civil Rights – Never-Rights
Snow – Ice – OMFG!
me–ice–omfg!
this is equally true whether i am slipping on it or that’s all that’s left in my cocktail glass…
Answering the door and finding:
Jehovah’s Witnesses – Hitler – Hitler, but he’s a Jehovah’s Witness
Gaffe – Gaffney – Nancy Kerrigan
hot pockets–bathrobe–gaffigan
Wall Street — K Street — Skid Row
K Street- C Street- Jump Street
Gaffe – Gaffney – Nancy Kerrigan
Nancy Kerrigan- Sarah Kerrigan- Zergling Rush
Edward R Murrow – Walter Cronkite – Bill O’Reilly
Need food — the prospect of putting on pants and going into the snow — Rice Chex for dinner
Interest – website – newsletter
Holy shit! They’re shutting down campus tomorrow, too!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA:
“Swish” is an anti-gay slur BTW.
Get off my cloud! – Get off my back! – Get off my lawn!
I have to tell you, just this afternoon, I had a confidential meeting with some senior conservative leaders to warn them about an influence operation against the conservative movement. They don’t want to hear it either! This is endemic.
no, it’s not…you are just bat-shit crazy, dood…
Protein – wisdom – smegma
koch brothers – tea party – sharia law
“Swish” is an anti-gay slur BTW.</i
But it's Gay Jeff Gaystein, so it's OK, of course.
I wouldn’t slap Jeff Goldstein with Anderson Cooper’s cock.
Oh, apparently they shut down I-70 here?
HTML – tag – fail
task – a beer first – not gonna happen
prospect of putting pants on
Interest – website – newsletter?
Need food — the prospect of putting on pants and going into the snow — Rice Chex for dinner
This reminds me of my freshman year, when everyone went home for the first big holiday and I was trapped on a locked, deserted campus in the middle of nowhere without food or money (the ATM was locked up too)… during a blizzard. I survived for three days on uncooked instant rice and the snacks that I could shake loose from the vending machine.
Get off my cloud! – Get off my back! – Get off my lawn!
hugh hefner–(butt secks)–dennis weaver–mick jagger saying “hey, hugh…get offa mccloud!”
Holy shit! They’re shutting down campus tomorrow, too!
are your rice chex going to hold through tomorrow?
Wheat Chex – Rice Chex – Bounced Chex
F – Y – WP
Holy shit! They’re shutting down campus tomorrow, too!
Last Thursday, a bunch of NYU students were having a massive snowball fight in Washington Square Park.
are your rice chex going to hold through tomorrow?
More importantly, how is the booze holding up?
are your rice chex going to hold through tomorrow?
They’ve plowed enough that I can get out. I’m not sure why they’re closing campus tomorrow, except that maybe the more suburban-type residential areas haven’t been plowed yet.
“This reminds me of my freshman year, when everyone went home for the first big holiday and I was trapped on a locked, deserted campus in the middle of nowhere without food or money (the ATM was locked up too)… during a blizzard. I survived for three days on uncooked instant rice and the snacks that I could shake loose from the vending machine.” — tweak — best-selling Stephen King novel
Robert Muldoon-John Key- ex Robert Muldoon
Need food — the prospect of putting on pants and going into the snow — Rice Chex for dinner
No groceries- foot and a half of snow- Donner Party
are your rice chex going to hold through tomorrow?
More importantly, how is the booze holding up?
Keep in mind the rice chex can only improve the taste of cheap liquor.
tweak — best-selling Stephen King novel
Why tweak? That’s about the length of one of his earlier novels.
donner party–trey parker–cannibal! the musical
Keep in mind the rice chex can only improve the taste of cheap liquor.
In a pinch, you can ferment the rice chex to make hobo sake.
Holy shit! They’re shutting down campus tomorrow, too!
Jesus Christ, I can’t believe it. There’s going to be hell to pay when classes finally start again. I don’t know if my profs are just going to cut out a week of course material or what.
Of course, not by the peaceful protesters just yearning for self-government and individual liberty. No. Because we all know the only thuggery exists on the side of the government who has insisted for years that it’s just not right to try to eliminate the Jews.
There are words here, and I even see some punctuation, but it’s not quite a sentence.
More importantly, how is the booze holding up?
Still have cheap whiskey (and Diet Dr. Pepper), a liiiitle Maker’s Mark, and some Absolut Pepar that I was using for Bloody Marys, but could also make a good martini with a banana pepper garnish, I think.
And I have frozen leftovers and could make some bread and have sandwiches. I’m just being a baby.
Rice chex-hobo sake- the blind leading the blind
Brad Pitt 8==> Jennifer Aniston 8==> Angelina Jolie
You 8==> that self-loathing fat chick 8==> Kathryn Lopez
Because we all know the only thuggery exists on the side of the government who has insisted for years that it’s just not right to try to eliminate the Jews.
Yes. Goodness knows Hosni Mubarak has been force one in trying to rid the world of Israel….
YouRoss Douthat 8==> that self-loathing fat chick 8==> Kathryn LopezFTFY
I’m just being a baby.
*packing suitcase*
Oh….BEING a baby….*whew*
Egypt — HCR — Lazy Americans
Jesus Christ, I can’t believe it. There’s going to be hell to pay when classes finally start again. I don’t know if my profs are just going to cut out a week of course material or what.
Yeah, Tuesday/Thursday classes are completely shot this week. I don’t know, either. I’m not looking forward to finding a place on my boss’s calendar to re-schedule the small group sessions we had to cancel, as that sort of thing usually involves the expectation that I can somehow bend the laws of space and time.
I’m just being a baby.
Quick, write something awful and subliterate, and watch the wingnut welfare swell your coffers!
Joseph Smith – L. Ron Hubbard – Glenn Beck
Jesus Christ, I can’t believe it. There’s going to be hell to pay when classes finally start again. I don’t know if my profs are just going to cut out a week of course material or what.
Spring break in South Bend!*
*substitute any college town
You 8==> that self-loathing fat chick 8==> Kathryn Lopez
I’ve had this dream before ^^
Beck 8=> Hannity 8=> Huckabee 8=> Palin
Joseph Smith – L. Ron Hubbard – Glenn Beck
We have a winner/wiener.
Most Scots – Rick Santorum – Gene David Fosdick
FYWP
Beck 8=> Hannity 8=> Huckabee 8=> Palin
I’m trying to figure out the mechanics of this and making myself pukey.
Fire in the disco- fire in the Taco Bell- danger, high voltage
“-hobo sake-”
There is NOTHING wrong with this combination of words.
Beck 8=> Hannity 8=> Huckabee 8=> Palin
Koo Koo Choo Choo
Gene David Fosdick
A new personal hero.
Yeah, Tuesday/Thursday classes are completely shot this week.
Maybe I just have a bad perspective from living on-campus (and not being aware of all the commuters and off-campus people who might be more stranded), but I just can’t believe this is necessary. The streets are cleared off in this part of town. I’d rather go to class tomorrow than know that I’ll have to shove 2 weeks of curriculum into one week at some point.
It’s not like I don’t like the time off, but it feels like almost too much. Maybe because I’m a little nerd who grew up always following all the rules, my consciousness is freaking out at getting three days off, scot-free, without any consequences.
I’m trying to figure out the mechanics of this and making myself pukey.
It’s kind of like a human centipede without the humans.
British Empire – Soviet Empire – Empire of the Senseless
hey now.
Bottled water – flavored water – vitamin water
Maybe because I’m a little nerd who grew up always following all the rules, my consciousness is freaking out at getting three days off, scot-free, without any consequences.
I miss all-day cuts…
It’s not like I don’t like the time off, but it feels like almost too much.
How about starting a massive snowball fight in the main campus quad?
Maybe I just have a bad perspective from living on-campus (and not being aware of all the commuters and off-campus people who might be more stranded), but I just can’t believe this is necessary.
It doesn’t seem necessary to me, either, but I live right off the intersection of two major thoroughfares, and maybe they’re worried about residential areas not being plowed yet. I can understand them canceling public school, but that’s mostly because it’s supposed to be fucking FREEZING tomorrow.
It’s weird, too, because I think this is only the fourth time they’ve shut down campus (the first time was that crazy-ass storm in 2005 or 2006–I don’t know if you were here–god, I’m old), and three of those days have been this week.
Bottled water – flavored water – vitamin water
Heavy water- mineral water- powdered water
WHAT???!?!?!
(the first time was that crazy-ass storm in 2005 or 2006–I don’t know if you were here–god, I’m old)
*glaring*
*glaring*
Compared to him, I probably am! I’m a fucking townie at this point.
Maybe I just have a bad perspective from living on-campus (and not being aware of all the commuters and off-campus people who might be more stranded), but I just can’t believe this is necessary.
Spagetti just wants more of those car crash videos on teh You Toobz.
Pot – crack – Prozac
I’ll give you a hint. I didn’t have a driver’s license in 2006.
More importantly, how is the booze holding up?
at Zombie Villa, it’s pretty good; I made sure to mostly finish shoveling first, so I am just cracking one of the bottles now.
tomorrow everyone should be getting around pretty well, and the liquor stores will all be open and restocked….
Pot – crack – Prozac
Monday — Sunday — What Day Is It?
Pot – crack – Prozac
Worst Beatles song EVER!
jesus christ–andrew lloyd weber–worst musical ever
That’s mostly guys spinning out on purpose. I used to do that on an old air-strip at my school when I was bored. I like this one.
Most Scots – Rick Santorum – Gene David Fosdick
FYWP
Weird. I went to college with the deputy DA named in that story.
but that’s mostly because it’s supposed to be fucking FREEZING tomorrow.
it is a balmy 7 degrees fahrenheit above zero here right now!!! we are supposed to hit the 30s this weekend…and then back to the deep freeze…effing weather…how does it work?
Sub, I know it was just controlled spins. I ruined my ABS and slip protection doing that nonsense. I didn’t want to be one of those sickos who find the one with deaths.
“-hobo sake-”
How long does it take to render the hobo?
Mubark — Great — I’m Being Paid to Say this
I’ll give you a hint. I didn’t have a driver’s license in 2006.
You’re not one of those idiots who commutes to class on skateboards, are you? God, I hate them.
Also, I keep seeing young men wearing pajama pants with Homer Simpson and basketballs and shit walking around campus. Are they 8 years old? How do they get laid? Why won’t they stay off my lawn?
How long does it take to render the hobo?
You can’t possibly be that hungry.
Also, I keep seeing young men wearing pajama pants with Homer Simpson and basketballs and shit walking around campus.
Hey, some of us only get to do laundry once a month!
Vehicles on fire in Tahrir Square.
“How long does it take to render the hobo?”
I chuckled.
(Did I spell that correctly?!)
You’re not one of those idiots who commutes to class on skateboards, are you? God, I hate them.
I can happily say I don’t even know how to skateboard. Rule-following nerd, remember? By “I didn’t have one”, I meant “I wasn’t old enough”, not that I had some alternate transportation.
Yeah, pajamas in public is an invention of my generation. Keeping in the spirit of the thread, Sweatpants – pajama bottoms – public nudity by the time my little brother goes to college.
Vehicles on fire in Tahrir Square.
Did you realize that more people are killed on the streets of Philadelphia each day than in Cairo?
public nudity by the time my little brother goes to college.
*koffkoffWHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE*
Let me tell you about da shtreaking! Ven I vuz a child….
<i.Did you realize that more people are killed on the streets of Philadelphia each day than in Cairo?
What are you, actor? A Mooslim Brutha Hood member?
What are you, actor? A Mooslim Brutha Hood member?
Sorry, I was time travelling. I thought we were talking about Baghdad in 2004, and I was Chris Wallace.
Tag — Fail — high on crack, pot and prozac.
I’ll give you a hint. I didn’t have a driver’s license in 2006.
The girls were doing it when I was in college, honestly. They’d come to class in a full face of makeup and with their hair styled, though, which I never understood. But at least the dudes wore track pants.
the streak–real country radio–a daily annoyance in my life
I was time travelling
How does the future look?
Let me tell you about da shtreaking! Ven I vuz a child….
Well, thank you for putting the image of an old Jewish grandfather streaking across campus into my head. Maybe it’s a good thing that I’m stuck inside.
How does the future look?
*taking off shades*
Can’t tell you. It would violate Stone Cutter law.
Snowball fight on the quad tomorrow!
I heard it on the radio. That’s how hip I am.
Well, thank you for putting the image of an old Jewish grandfather streaking across campus into my head. Maybe it’s a good thing that I’m stuck inside.
Where it can fester and swell until you wake up with night terrors, certain there’s a naked septuganerian serial killer named Morris outside your door….BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
Did somebody say crashes? I think you can see me and our dear beloved Vasco in about one frame, maybe two at the very start.
Where it can fester and swell until you wake up with night terrors, certain there’s a naked septuganerian serial killer named Morris outside your door….BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
Of course, now I’ve got Vincent Price’s monologue in Thriller stuck inside my head…
Moar importantly, how are investors being affected by the protests?!
I want to know how this affects Sarah Palin
Moar importantly, how are investors being affected by the protests?!
ahhhhh, yes! my faux news loving mother had this very same query just yesterday…she doesn’t know beans about the market, but she has become very worried about them since she started watching that crap…
What part did Charlie Sheen play in the Egypt protests? Find out the shocking truth! Tonight! On GlennBeck…
Did somebody say crashes?
That is one of the most pathetically sad things I’ve ever seen.
Which reminds me of the time my cousin said that her daughter (Portland-born and raised) was complaining about the heat because it was 80 degrees out.
I want to know how this affects Sarah Palin
well, they all hate her, obviously, which makes baby jesus cry…
she doesn’t know beans about the market, but she has become very worried about them since she started watching that crap…
Mostly because the markets tanked in coincident to the Egypt uprising, which creates uncertainty.
Of course, no one could possibly have known it was merely a time out on the part of investors, a market correction (possibly technical and computer driven), since the uncertainty has only risen higher, as have the markets…
Food -> Digestion -> SHIT!!
BWAHAHAHA Speaking of Palin, this made me LOL.
say, has this been discussed yet?
actor – Muslim Brotherhood – Shania
actor – Muslim Brotherhood – Shania law
say, has this been discussed yet?
Well, it would be
If the link worked
South Dakota? Total-abortion-banning South Dakota? Mandatory-gun-ownership South Dakota? That South Dakota? Jesus, when you’ve lost South Dakota, you’ve lost Moran America. What the hell would she win? Utah and Kansas?
actor – Muslim Brotherhood – Shania law
I could think of a few laws I’d put her under…
hmmmm…me don’t know how to fix the linky…
say, has this been discussed yet?
link fixed.
thank you, dkw!
yahoo—google—Sadly No!
Moral Majority — Ronald Reagan — Fox News
Dickie Nixon — Ronald Reagan — Georgie Bush
Newt Gingrich — George W. Bush — Global Warming
OT, but the workplace wingnutz are discussing how watching TV news is better and cheaper than providing public high schools.
At least it’s CNN they think ought to replace public education and not Fox.
bleargh, thank you all for helping me stay sane.
OT, but the workplace wingnutz are discussing how watching TV news is better and cheaper than providing public high schools
yikes! they are kidding, right?
I’d love to see the consequence of a generation of children raised by CNN.
“Billy, did you complete your math homework for today?”
“Well, opinions differ as to whether or not the math homework was completed, or what “completed” even means. Let’s go to our expert panel!”
they are kidding, right?
Nope – one of them is the guy who’s constantly bitching about global warming being a scam and the scientists investigating it a bunch of greedy hucksters, and he’s partly paid out of a grant to the university’s Atmospheric Sciences department. He’s not stupid but he’s not very smart, if you take my meaning.
opinions differ as to whether or not the math homework was completed
LOL
or after getting a D- on it, “mistakes were made.”
Kansas
HEY!
Sorry, T&U. Utah and Idaho, then.
“Well, opinions differ as to whether or not the math homework was completed, or what “completed” even means. Let’s go to our expert panel!”
Great, now my teenager is a Sadlynaut. Is there no end to the madness?
Sorry, T&U. Utah and Idaho, then.
Thanks. Now I won’t have to make that joke about Chuck E. Cheeze after all.
Utah and Idaho, then.
No argument from this Utahn.
I’d be interested, in a hypothetical Obama-vs.-Romney/Thune/Daniels-vs.-Teabagger insurgent contest, how Obama does in the deep south. If the Republicans would split enough to give Obama say, Mississippi or Georgia with a 40-30-30- plurality.
re: Anderson Cooper
I dunno why teh wingnuts all have such a hate-on for teh Vanderbilt boy. He’s white as white can be, has an extremely affluent background -basically he’s from the right circles. And he’s fucking hardcore, having had his start as an amateur journalist that assigned himself to war zones around the world. Motherfucker is so badass that he’d never shoot a man to watch him die, because that would be boring.
Anyways, via matt Browner Hamlin via Atrios’ twitter – Jay Newton Small reminds me of why I found TIME’s Swampland such a fucking shithole of festering pustules.
I dunno why teh wingnuts all have such a hate-on for teh Vanderbilt boy
teh gheyness? or was that a rhetorical question?
Margaret Thatcher—Reaganomics—Cruella DeVille
teh gheyness?
1. Anderson doesn’t talk about his sexuality, so if he is ghey he’s a closeted queer. Repubs and conservatives love closeted queers. Often in airport bathrooms.
2. I’m totes heterosexual, but I’d guess that Anderson’s gheyness might be a big selling point amongst conservative men. I mean, he’s just so damn pretty.
Cooper was verrry mean *sniff* to the pore ole veteran Birther so I think the righties don’t like him no moar.
Cocksuckers — motherfuckers — marrying a box turtle.
I guess team loyalty trumps even fantasy-life. Because if I were a keyboard kommando, Anderson Cooper – big shot media personality jet setting to areas riven with violent conflict – would be my role model.
They really don’t like journalist-types…
Winston Churchill — Margaret Thatcher — George W Bush
cotton pickin’ — finger lickin — chicken plucker
Sucking cock is totally wrong
Unless they suck Your Author’s dong
“1. Anderson doesn’t talk about his sexuality, so if he is ghey he’s a closeted queer”
well, sorta. He’s fond of going out and about with his very hunky studmuffin partner. He never kept secret, more just being discreet.
e.e. cummings — ‘The Silent Miaow’ — LOLcats.
Sweet IPU, all praises to her obvious unvisibility! I just took a peek at Swampland and JNS’ lastest two posts are:
1. John McCain is Back! Hooray!
2. Looks like 2012 will see a wave election sweeping the GOP into Senate control.
FFS, Reince Priebus isn’t working as hard at selling RNC PR BS as Jay Newton-Small.
Cyclone Yasi – giant blizzard – algore is fat!
Azathoth – Yog-Sothoth – Wilbur Whatley
Napoleonic wars – Income tax – My fucking landlady won’t fix my shower tiles
Cyclone Yasi – giant blizzard – algore is fat!
LOL
say, has this been discussed yet?
That article doesn’t do it justice at all. The idjit is trying to make a point about the mandate, namely that it’s UNCONSATUSHUL. Trouble is, the Militia Act of 1792, signed into law by George Washington, madated that every able bodied etc. man equip himself with a gun and powder and lead and so on. Which was a considerable burden to many.
True, the HCR mandate is based in the commerce clause so it’s not exactly the right precedent but none the less, teh gubblemint can indeed mandate your private market purchase.
PHTPHTPHTPTPHTPTHTTTPHPTTT
Well that’s settled then. Anne Coulter has settled the “large magazine” question once and for all.
Source: one of the numerous Human Events spams I received today.
Hmmm, ways to achieve a higher body-count in the Tucson shootings…
By Anne Coulter’s logic, it should be legal to own a tank. Who wouldn’t see that coming?
I can’t think of a clever reason to post this but I’m going to do it anyway because it’s so damn cute.
Peej!
This is genius.
Somebody certainly has an ear to the hip food market ground!
By Anne Coulter’s logic,,,
BWAAAhahAHahAHAHAHAhHAHAHAAAHAHAAHAHA!!!
Whooo, that’s a funneh one there. hee hee.
I can’t think of a clever reason to post this but I’m going to do it anyway because it’s so damn cute.
Fuuuuuuck, that hurt!
Fuuuuuuck, that hurt!
Hm. Not the reaction I’d have expected.
I know, right?
Lotsa hot chicks at jezebels.
William O Douglas – Wendy O Williams – Obama
Heh, hadn’t seen that yet. Olympic Provisions is a damn fine
salumeriacharcuterie. The sauce grabiche is perfect for the crispy trotter terrine.Hm. Not the reaction I’d have expected.
It’s like my hormones know I’ve turned thirty without having a kid–my people breed young.
Lotsa hot chicks at jezebels.
Not since I stopped posting there.
The sauce grabiche is perfect for the crispy trotter terrine.
You’re not helping.
The Sorrows of Young Werther- –Daytime Soaps— Snooki
Crack Whore — Assistant Crack Whore — Assistant Crack Whore Trainee
Crack addict — crack whore — Sarah Palin
what?!
You’re not helping.
Missing the big sausage?
Palestinian Authority ->Mike Huckabee->Greater Israel
Crank addict — Sarah Palin — crank addict
Missing the big sausage?
You dick.
(I hope it’s clear that’s a joke, btw).
I didn’t understand the inciting link at all, so I can’t get started with this here thread. How does this work?
1. Make up a list of names loosely connected by some idear you had
2. ???
3. WOLVERINES!!!
Is that essentially correct?
(I hope it’s clear that’s a joke, btw).
Absolutely. Whale Chowder’s dick is a joke.
Spengler:
Yes.
Is that essentially correct?
Yes.
Absolutely. Whale Chowder’s dick is a joke.
Did his mom tell you that, or your mom?
“Crossroads” – “Cocaine” – “Wonderful Tonight”
I’ll reprise mine from Roy’s thread:
Curly -> Shemp -> Joe.
That article doesn’t do it justice at all. The idjit is trying to make a point about the mandate, namely that it’s UNCONSATUSHUL. Trouble is, the Militia Act of 1792, signed into law by George Washington, madated that every able bodied etc. man equip himself with a gun and powder and lead and so on. Which was a considerable burden to many.
“On Point” had a show recently with several Constitutional scholars and the number of them that thought the unconstitutional argument held any water at all = ZERO.
Yes.
Yes to me, or yes to Spengler?
Yes.
Late to the party!
“Crossroads” – “Cocaine” – “Wonderful Tonight”
Yes.
Ah, I see.
Wait, what?
“Crossroads” – “Cocaine” – “Wonderful Tonight”
Awesome. And it even works on two levels!
Well in that case, B?o ??i – Henry Kissinger – the Vietnamese lady who runs Fairy Nails down the street.
Yes.
In the other, more sophisticated parts of the internet, Bo Dai with accents doesn’t have any question marks. Hi, WordPress, how’s your mom? Never mind, I’ll ask her myself.
Oh man…I’m tired an I got nothin’. It’s like makin’ my arts uses up all of my funny juice reserves or something.
(I hope it’s clear that’s a joke, btw).
My guffaw says yes yes yes.
I love the names of Korean nail places. I used to go to Queenly Nails.
My guffaw says yes yes yes.
I was pretty sure it was, but I feel like being nice tonight, and fucking tone on the internet, man.
You’re ALL DICKS!!! PENES!!!
Screw the wealth and opulence–I want the NAILS of royalty!
You know what’s weird? Everyone seems fixated on dick. Even guys who are “totes heterosexual”. Why is there no similar fixation on vajayjays?
T&U, you’ve recently shown signs of a more mellow, less embattled self. Have you had a hysterectomy?
Speak for yourself.
that sort of thing usually involves the expectation that I can somehow bend the laws of space and time.
I spent some time as an Executive Assistant and my understanding was that I was being paid to take the blame for things.
I guess because dicks are so more in your face, so to speak. And symbolic of so many things…
T&U, you’ve recently shown signs of a more mellow, less embattled self. Have you had a hysterectomy?
Not that I know of…?
I spent some time as an Executive Assistant and my understanding was that I was being paid to take the blame for things.
Oh, that, too.
If people are performing secret hysterectomies–I AM OUTRAGED! And a little INRAGED too!
number of them that thought the unconstitutional argument held any water at all = ZERO.
The trouble is that Supreme Court justices are not constitutional scholars.
FFS! I have to stop with Swampland. I remember Michael Scherer taking long long JiSM3 knob polishing sessions during teh campaign but Jay Newton-Small is making that previous fawning coverage seem objective. As I mentioned, her latest two posts were a love letter to John McCain and a prediction of a 2012 GOP wave election. Well, I figured that perhaps looking at only two posts might be unrepresentative. It was – she is even more hacktastic than those two posts would lead you to believe.
3. Judge Roll died in the Loughner rampage. This makes the current judicial confirmation backlog even worse. Blame for the backlog is rests with both parties.
4. and I blockquote,
But wait, there’s MOAR! Further in the post she talks about teh Bachmann response, noted for how crazy eyes managed to creep out all of America. She says nothing about whether it was good or bad and cites all of one person for an opinion on REPEAL THE SENATE’s speech. That one person? Irky Irksome.
Holy fucking shit.
Congratulations Jay Newton-Small, you have managed to make me think even less of your profession and your publication than I did before. And we’re talking about the home of Joe “neither the time nor the legal background to figure out who’s right” Klein.
If people are performing secret hysterectomies–I AM OUTRAGED! And a little INRAGED too!
Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’d notice.
Also, if I am, in actuality, demonstrably mellower, it’s probably because I’ll have three extra days off this week and I have a little pot.
Why is there no similar fixation on vajayjays?
wow, it’s like you’re new here.
Dicks put the dick into ridiculous
for vs, since I know how much she loves poetry.
VAGINA.
See? Health care is so expensive in this country because the minute we’re feeling down, we hack out our uteri. And all we needed was a couple days off and some maryjayjay.
FFS! I have to stop with Swampland.
You do, Wangchuck. You might as well just read Politico.
See? Health care is so expensive in this country because the minute we’re feeling down, we hack out our uteri.
Well, you know, Prozac can only do so much.
“for vs, since I know how much she loves poetry.
VAGINA.”
Oh boy. I’m not for thinking of vajayjays as foreign and disgusting things…but I really don’t want to smell random strange pussy.
God – Country – Notre Dame
Saw that tattoed on the large cross on the lower back of lady friend I once knew
I can’t believe you didn’t get sucked into the deep blue peepers of hunky dumbo-eared Ryan. He’s DREAMY
Oh boy. I’m not for thinking of vajayjays as foreign and disgusting things…but I really don’t want to smell random strange pussy.
They’re not actually pussy-scented. That would be appalling, even to people who like pussy.
Did I not read far enough? Well…I’m thankful I got it rong.
Actually, I’m sure there would be a market for it, just not for vadge poetry ladies.
Rule 34…sort of
Did I not read far enough? Well…I’m thankful I got it rong.
Me, too. Vagina photos are pretty risque for Salt Lake City–she’d probably be arrested for making books with crootch juice on them.
Wow. I’m 12. I laughed at “cooch juice”
Yeah, I had been Swampland-free for like over a year, until I saw that @JNSmall tweet about Anderson Cooper. What a fucking piece of shit she is.
Nevermind us–just talkin’ vaginas! Feel free to chime in…or change the subject…
Wait…what was the tweet?
Wow. I’m 12. I laughed at “cooch juice”
I actually originally had “cooch juice,” but I think I like “crootch juice” better. Mostly because it’s an inside joke with…myself…
Also too, teh reason us guys don’t talk so much about vadges is that you ladies hog the thread when the discussion turns to ladyparts.
Not that we mind. Feel free to talk about female genitalia as much as you’d like.
“hog the thread”
See? You guys just can’t stop.
Background, AC is in Cairo. He ends up swamped by pro-Mubarak counter-protestors and is physically assaulted.
Here is Jay Newton-Small’s response.
Dude, I know. Nevermind that SEVERAL reporters were assaulted in some way.
Also, I tend to think if you’re a reporter and you get the shit beaten out of you, you’re probably doing something right.
Wow. That’s profoundly stupid.
“Also, I tend to think if you’re a reporter and you get the shit beaten out of you, you’re probably doing something right.”
This.
Dude, I know.
Just filling in the working artist*.
*V-bowchikawowow-R
It sounds bucolic: the genitalia went grazing in the woods.
Just filling in the working artist*.
No, I was agreeing with you, not admonishing you.
On the upside, other people aren’t happy, either.
I do happen to be fixated on my “dick,” but uninterested in those of others.
“cooch juice”
That’s fuckin poetic, that is.
Not that we mind. Feel free to talk about female genitalia as much as you’d like.
recently I was at a function where a couple women sitting at the table started talking breastfeeding. Not being actor, I was relatively quiet. When I got up for more food, they laughed and asked if they drove me away; I said, no, it was an intriguing conversation, but I really had little to add.
AC is in Cairo
I don’t care for his work since he split up with DC
😉
So now they’re all hating on him? After he got punched in the head?
OH
YOUR
GOD [/Bender]
The trouble is that Supreme Court justices are not constitutional scholars.
Also not very smart, some of them.
Esp. if the thugs beating up the reporters are pro-Mubarak weasels, or actual forces of repression police-types.
“February 3, 2011 at 3:40
It sounds bucolic: the genitalia went grazing in the woods.”
I snorted unprettily.
He was mean to th’ old coot birther
I snorted unprettily.
That scares away the unicorns. Also, your manifest lack of virginity, too.
T&U, yeah I was pretty sure you were agreeing. Also thanks for pointing out that I’m not the only one being reminded of @JNSmall’s worth as a human being.
” but I really had little to add.”
You shouldn’t be shy about sharing your experiences feeding your zomblet
Feel free to talk about female genitalia as much as you’d like.
They’re GREAT for storage.
I follow a LOT of them, too, which is weird.
we hack out our uteri
DON’T JUDGE ME!
You follow a lot of female genitalia? Like, with a mop?
They’re GREAT for storage.
I keep a spare key up in there.
“That scares away the unicorns. Also, your manifest lack of virginity, too.”
Unicorns are into slut-shaming?!!!!!! My whole world has just been turned upside down!!!!
Like, with a mop?
Yes. I’m *that* good.
on the upside, other people aren’t happy either
Wait, JNS got the Douche of the Day award? GodDAMNIT I’ve been trying to get that one for years!
Unicorns are into slut-shaming?!!!!!!
You don’t want to know what they think of your earrings, neither.
Yes. I’m *that* good.
HAWT.
“You don’t want to know what they think of your earrings, neither.”
What the hell? I had no idea unicorns were basically bitchy gossipy uber-Christian sorority girls.
I had no idea unicorns were basically bitchy gossipy uber-Christian sorority girls.
White and horny. They’re basically the cast of American Pie.
What the hell?
Maybe you shouldn’t have worn those unicorn horn earrings.
Also, just to clarify – not an Anderson Cooper fanboi. He did impress me when he just reamed Landrieu during Katrina, but his work since then has been a lot of establishment buffing twaddle.
He is kinda cute, but I am totes heterosexual. Plus completely incompatible with someone that has seen as much death and misery as he has. Even Michael Ware took some time off for PTSD, but there’s the Vanderbilt boy going like the Energizer bunny – now reporting from inside the angry mob in Egypt. Kinda creepy there, Anderson.
I think he’s a robot.
I like my men like I like my unicorns–white and horny.
Nope. Sounds racist. Might bes good for some White Power dating service though…
Is anybody else here a virgin?
I like my men like I like my unicorns: mythical and attracted to virgins.
“Also, just to clarify – not an Anderson Cooper fanboi.”
You should be able to starburst over whomever you like. Fanboy away.
“February 3, 2011 at 4:02
Is anybody else here a virgin?”
DK-W just talks big.
Is anybody else here a virgin?
Your mom?
You’re Jesus, aren’t you?
You should be able to starburst over whomever you like.
Oh, I do. Just wanted to clarify that point because looking back over my comments, it sure seems like I’m very protective of the Vanderbilt boy.
Very, very late to the party…and it was a l-o-n-g catch-up. 582 comments.
Now I haz a sad because nobody seems to be playing the Three Linked Things game anymore.
“sure seems like I’m very protective of the Vanderbilt boy.”
I didn’t take it that way. But I have GODLIKE POWERS OF PERCEPTION. All your minds R belong to me!
People are still playing sporadically, Variants.
Is anybody else here a virgin?
I’m starting to wish I were.
There is shooting, tear gas & you name it in Cairo as I type!
DK-W just talks big.
VPR
Mercedes-Benz –> Milton Bradley (games) –> Muslim Brotherhood –> Milton Bradley (ballplayer) –> Malignant Bouffant
Now I haz a sad because nobody seems to be playing the Three Linked Things game anymore.
Some of us suck at it.
Branes-branes-branes.
See?
I’m the author of God. Similar.
Pics or it didn’t…
Branes-branes-branes.
O shit I hope I don’t trigger M. Bouffant.
I’m the author of God. Similar.
I haven’t gotten to that part of your book. Don’t spoil it.
Dammit. That’s what I get for not quoting.
Makin’ arts–gettin’ paid–fuckin’ around on S,N
NABPL -> Dead Ball Era -> Merkle’s Boner*
*VbaseballR
I’m starting to wish I were.
There is shooting, tear gas & you name it in Cairo as I type!
Are these two…related in any way?
Is anybody else here a virgin?
at what?
I’ve been riveted on Eygpt.
For the Aljazeera followers. There is a fine Google map link that you can push in for tight detail. I keep it in a seperate window with another open to the live feed. I’ve been doing tactical analysis.
You can be damn sure there is a US intel satellite parked right above the Delta now…tracking crowd formation and movement, military vehicular movement and working the military freqs. The Egyptian Army–from the first–is the key.
Also, to those simple-minded Faux shit-for-brains who try to make out Aljazeera as some Al Qaeda propaganda arm, consider this: In US crisis monitoring centers, they damn sure are not watching US cable or broadcast news as closely as Aljazeera.
Okay, not even the Three Linked Things game can keep me here. Back to Egypt.
It’s been fun to read, even though I didn’t get to play. Actor was really on a roll in this one!
I’m the author of God. Similar.
But you guys are related, right?
Hitler -> Hitler -> Sheikh Barack Nasser bin Hamad Al Khalifa Hussein Obama
Jesus is my kid. I wanted him to be a boxer but during the big fight he got nailed with a right cross.
WTH?! It’s like five o clock in the morning in Cairo. You can’t be rioting at that hour! It’s uncivilized!
So I see, VS. I’ll stay, get some coffee, and toss some stuff in. It looks like fun!
For the Aljazeera followers. There is a fine Google map link that you can push in for tight detail
And Homeland Security won’t start following you because everyone is doing it!
Genesis-Genesis-Genesis
You can pick your own three declension points.
but during the big fight he got nailed with a right cross.
oh. my. dad. that is some good humor, there!
So I see, VS. I’ll stay, get some coffee, and toss some stuff in. It looks like fun!
Coffee? How will you fit in with coffee?
At least tell us you are on peyote, or pineal fluid or something.
Genesis – Nintendo – The Matrix
You can pick your own three declension points.
Oh, I thought you were just summoning the spirits of Phil Collins and/or Peter Gabriel.
The — fact — is.
but during the big fight he got nailed with a right cross.
oh. my. dad. that is some good humor, there!
Zombie humors is the bezt.
I’ll have three extra days off this week and I have a little pot.
So do I, but the Frau Doktorin is nice enough to say it’s “cute”.
those unicorn horn earrings.
Umm, that’s not horn.
You can do wonderful things with plastination.
pineal fluid
Veiled From Beyond reference?
The fact is, Satan — Hitler — Liberals. I win.
Zombie humors is the bezt.
prove it
” pineal fluid”
LULZ. zombie humor is pretty great.
Oh, I thought you were just summoning the spirits of Phil Collins and/or Peter Gabriel.
O holy hell no.
Yanno, for all the weenieness of Phil, I have to say that Gabriel’s most recent album really destroyed, for me, any of his cred. And I have seen him on one of his recent tours where his daughter sings.
So as of 2010, they are starting from a dead heat. Or perhaps I will just wait for the new Mekons album. Yes, that seems more advisable.
goatfucker–gary ruppert–true
Veiled From Beyond reference?
not really so veiled.
Also, HST reference.
#
bbkf said,
February 3, 2011 at 4:40 (kill)
Zombie humors is the bezt.
prove it
#
vs said,
February 3, 2011 at 4:41 (kill)
” pineal fluid”
LULZ. zombie humor is pretty great.
Can I just mention here that I love bars, bartenders, and everything that goes with them, except the other patrons? I think what we need is more private clubs. That are really just bars for me and my friends.
really zrm? is that all ya got?
Can I just mention here that I love bars, bartenders, and everything that goes with them, except the other patrons?
If you ever get to Milwaukee, I will take you to the RIGHT BARS.
Jesus is my kid. I wanted him to be a boxer but during the big fight he got nailed with a right cross.
We’ve all seen the guy; he’s obviously a featherweight. He was in the ring with religious hypocrisy and the autocratic class. Those are big dudes, you dick!
FUCK YOU WORDPRESS THIS JOKE ISN’T EVEN THAT GOOD
Can I just mention here that I love bars, bartenders, and everything that goes with them, except the other patrons? I think what we need is more private clubs. That are really just bars for me and my friends.
well, come on over! that pretty much sums up our philosophy!
Oh my. Whom will be allowed past the velvet ropes of Spengler’s exclusive drinkin’ club?
really zrm? is that all ya got?
I figured the other posters saying as much was a pretty good testimonial.
Of course, I rarely make jokes about my etchings or fucking people’s mothers, so maybe this isn’t my crowd….
But otherwise, yeah. That’s all I got. I take what I can get, and my self-esteem is such that I am happy with that.
FUCK YOU WORDPRESS THIS JOKE ISN’T EVEN THAT GOOD
Actual out-loud lulz
All Sadlies will be members of my exclusive speakeasy. Even Gary.
Oh my. Whom will be allowed past the velvet ropes of Spengler’s exclusive drinkin’ club?
I AM CERTAIN ZOMBIES WILL BE ON THE GUEST LIST.
And Homeland Security won’t start following you because everyone is doing it!
I’m not important enough to track, although it’s entirely possible that I’ve been flagged somewhere on key-word searches. (Who the hell puts Kharg Island, JSOC, the Darius oilfield, and ‘exfiltration’ in the same e-mail?)
In any event, I don’t give a shit.
I AM CERTAIN ZOMBIES WILL BE ON THE GUEST LIST.
even the little girl with one arm that he callously destroyed.
It’s just that I was *committed* to it, you know?
But otherwise, yeah. That’s all I got. I take what I can get, and my self-esteem is such that I am happy with that.
this made me laff…i was just hoping for a whole string of zombie jokes…you know, like leper jokes…
“I AM CERTAIN ZOMBIES WILL BE ON THE GUEST LIST.”
I would be honored if you would escort me. (Then buy me drinks)
ALL ZOMBIES WILL BE ON THE GUEST LIST BECAUSE MOAR ZOMBIES THAT’S WHY.
George Romero -> Tony Danza -> Counterfeit Rolex
At least tell us you are on peyote, or pineal fluid or something.
I’m stoned. I like the sweet smoke.
All Sadlies will be members of my exclusive speakeasy. Even Gary.
i was going to go so far as to say i would work for entrance to your exclusive speakeasy, since i know how to make drinks and such…
Are these two…related in any way?
No, no. Just saving electrons.
Another two-in-one:
Branes-branes-branes.
O shit I hope I don’t trigger M. Bouffant.
Brain! Braaa-in!
bbkf plus one… [makes list]
even the little girl with one arm that he callously destroyed.
That wasn’t his fault. Those were bad guys.
this made me laff…i was just hoping for a whole string of zombie jokes…you know, like leper jokes…
wow. It’s like you are new here.
Socrates -> Kierkegaard -> Eric Erickson
That wasn’t his fault. Those were bad guys.
HE’S THE AUTHOR OF GOD!!!!
We at the esteemed Riddled Brewery and Artichoke Fermentation Experimental Centre would be happy to provide drinkez to Spengler’s place.
Bars: Overpriced booze, crummy music whose volume is not under my control.
I still have the girl’s other arm. It flops around a little, so I strap my automatic watches on it and it keeps them wound up.
Julius Caesar on seeing Britain: Veni, vidi, vici
Rich Lowry on seeing Sarah Palin: Vidi, veni.
Socrates -> Kierkegaard -> Eric Erickson
…hmm. who would have guessed this gun barrel would taste so oily?
I still have the girl’s other arm. It flops around a little, so I strap my automatic watches on it and it keeps them wound up.
heh.
My knowledge of Egypt mostly comes from the Yu-Gi-Oh cartoon series so bear that in mind.
When Tunisia went at the end of last year, Mubarak didn’t consider himself threatened. As the riots grew and the Day of Anger passed, Mubarak may have started to feel threatened or maybe not. Angry Friday was a different story. When a crowd of something like two million people show up – that pretty much puts the nail in the coffin. two million is 2.5% the population of Egypt. That many showing up to protest basically means your ability to rule through fear of the police force is pretty much broken.
That’s why he agreed not to run again. He voluntarily put a time limit on his rule. Not the move of a despotic tyrant unless he already sees the writing on the wall. Note that his term is set to expire this year.
What has been going on since then is people jockeying for best positioning in post-Mubarak Egypt. Plus the president would like to save some face and not be run out of the country on a rail. Also, not have his previous actions be investigated in any detail.
There’s all sorts of criticism of the US being behind the action on this. That’s good and reasonable – the US shouldn’t be leading on populist uprisings in foreign countries. Also too, conflicting desires within the Administration. The biggest concern for the US going forward is probably about the effect of a less secular and more Islamic Egypt on neighbouring Palestine and of course, Israel.
And then the bad guys will collect the fifth Exodia card and it’ll be a race against time to keep them from summoning The Forbidden One.
bbkf plus one… [makes list]
oh goody…i will bring my martini shaker, magic bullet and my own je ne se quois…
*needle scratches record*
“My knowledge of Egypt mostly comes from the Yu-Gi-Oh cartoon series”
Speaking of funny dudes… I don’t sAy it often cuz I don’t want you to get a big head.
DKW talking about your mom – DKW talking about Yu-gi-oh – DKW talking about his mom.
Here’s my take on the Egypt situation, which I think I can say is reasonably accurate because I study international politics with some interest:
The Pharonic Dynasties -> Nasser -> Transformers II
I don’t sAy it often cuz I don’t want you to get a big head.
VPR? Couldn’t be. Can’t imagine you not wanting me to get a big head in that sense.
heh.
Now you’re laughing at the suffering of your own people??? And we aren’t even allowed to make the occasional chainsaw/Molotov cocktail/rifle/shotgun/semi-automatic weapon/automatic weapon/axe/tire iron/fire/grenade/giant truck/knife/sword/mace/giant rock/small rock/crossbow/pickaxe/cannon/morning star/scythe/machete joke?
“I don’t sAy it often cuz I don’t want you to get a big head.
VPR? Couldn’t be. Can’t imagine you not wanting me to get a big head in that sense.”
You know me too well.
I forgot baseball bats and small trucks! Fuck!
forgot baseball bats and small trucks! Fuck!
you did have a pretty good roll going there…
T&U, you also forgot bees. You could train bees to become a weapon.
State Dep’t. advises Americans who want to get out of Egypt to get to the airport immediately. All well & good, but what about Americans who’d like to leave America? Huh?
You could train bees to become a weapon.
I know! The *most* obvious! I was hoping nobody would notice.
All well & good, but what about Americans who’d like to leave America?
I’m sure some members of Mubarak’s regime would trade places with you!
Africanized bees with thick, pendulous stingers.
Africanized bees with thick, pendulous stingers.
Wait, are still talking about zombies? Or are we on to teabaggers?
Sun Tzu — Clausewitz — Rumsfeld
George Thorogood … Stevie Ray Vaughn … Pomplamoose
Glory — Saving Private Ryan — Red Dawn
George Carlin — Stephen Colbert — Sean Hannity
Dorothy Parker — Molly Ivins — Gretchen Carlson
Edward R. Murrow — Walter Cronkite — David Gregory
Gregory Peck — Dick Gregory — David Gregory
Africanized bees with thick, pendulous stingers.
heh…i see what you did there…
If I started a blog entitled: “Hilarious Shit I Write When I’m Fucked Up” (or “Stoned”–I haven’t decided which, although I’m sure I’d want to write a lot and my lungs can’t handle that much smoke, so perhaps other drug forms would be acceptable), would you guys read it? Be honest.
The Pharonic Dynasties -> Nasser -> Transformers II
Larfed, O Author of God.
Africanized bees with thick,twistingly veined, pendulous stingers. Just ready to inject their thick white poison into unwilling, soft European flesh that is lying, trembling, waiting….
would you guys read it? Be honest.
sh’ya!
Oh, I see how it is.
would you guys read it? Be honest.
Fuckin’ A !!! Go for it!
sh’ya!
YAAAAY! So, that’s two…I wonder if I should tell my mom about it?
Be honest.
Sure, I would, but as someone w/ a bit of experience in that field, you may not be as hee-larious as you believe. That stuff usually requires mucho polishing. Then you have to get a buzz on again & re-read it, to see if it really is as funny. Course if you’re just drunk, & being non-ironically stoopit …
Just go for a web log, but don’t limit yourself. “Hee-larious (No, really.) Stuff” can be a category.
uh, oh…fox news and dick morris all say egypt is obama’s fault…
I would totes read that. And comment. Stoned.
Occasional?
Sure, I would, but as someone w/ a bit of experience in that field, you may not be as hee-larious as you believe.
Oh, I am quite aware of that. I guess that’s part of the point?
T&U, call your blog “I’m Funnier When You’re High.”
That’s for free. All part of the service.
would you guys read it? Be honest.
If you want to take it easy, I would be happy to add you as coblogger at the Empire. We are, after all, very low-pressure.
Course if you’re just drunk, & being non-ironically stoopit …
Hey now.
dick morris all say egypt is obama’s fault…
well, f you can’t trust a toe-fetishist, who can you trust?
T&U, call your blog “I’m Funnier When You’re High.”
“Wow, that’s amazing…I wish I was that good….
That’s for free. All part of the service.
…..oh, fuck you, funny good-writer guy!”
T&U, call your blog “I’m Funnier When You’re High.”
regardless, that is going into my blog’s tag file.
Martin Luther King … Ben E. King … Steve King
Julien Bond in the NAACP … James Bond in From Russia With Love … Gold Bond in yer shorts
James Brown … Jackson. Browne … Tina Brown
Once Upon a Time in the West … The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly … Young Guns
I would be happy to add you as coblogger
Thank you! I think I’d probably want to do it as its own thing, though.
Plus, I’m forced to update it more often. If I can start it first.
OT–but really, what is or isn’t?
teh hubby and i are watching some show on current about LEAFS SUCK cops…wow, i would not want to get busted by those beotches in vancouver! also, their language skills are superior…
M. Bouffant is the go to guy for policy ideas regarding police.
Why yes. I’m The Man, so to speak.
Hymn to goddess Ninkasi including beer recipe, 6th century BC -> liquor store -> me
Zombie humors is the bezt.
i now know this to be true…the new starburst commercial is hysterical!
also, i see what you did there…with the humors and pineal fluid…jesus h christ…i spent $40k getting a BA in english and it took me this long?!?!? more jack daniels, please…
Spengler is a generous guy.
Srsly, T&U, I would mos def read it. I usually bop around at least once a week to Sadlies’ sites, mostly in lurker-mode just to see what’s poppin’.
I like your observations and humor here. I think you could sustain a blog.
——
Finished my coffee. Off to Egypt soon. Before I forget, thanks to DA for a fun game. This thread has been very entertaining to read.
I have some “policy ideas” regarding this guy, too.
Also for Pup: The icy street video was superfine. Nonstop slow-mo disasters one after the other. Like living in America.
Speaking of Empire, I see on there somebody just bought a fiddle. Picking up an instrument is about the best thing EVAR. It’s just so goddamn fun.
I had a tag on my last comment that went but fucking WP decided it was an actual tag and made it invisible.
I have some “policy ideas” regarding this guy, too.
Holy fuck. I’m guessing your “policy ideas” are what we call “country justice” around these parts.
I have some “policy ideas” regarding this guy, too.
does it involve an anagram of his last name?
uh, oh…fox news and dick morris all say egypt is obama’s fault…
Obviously. The only question is whether he should have given more support to the protesters, more support to Mubarak, or done less meddling in another country’s affairs. We won’t know for sure until it all pans out… stay tuned!
Nay.
cock > tea baggers > throat stuffing
note to vs!!! i was just reading an author’s bio and she has two sons named buck and bart…and twin grandsons named pepper and greyson…i hope the first three are not on your list!
Curly–Shemp–Curly Joe
Speaking of Empire, I see on there somebody just bought a fiddle
I encourage you to stop by and call it a fiddle. Much hilarity will result.
Star Trek — Battlestar Galactica — MST3K
Father Coughlin – William F. Buckley – “Little” Billy Kristol
Wm. F. Buckley — Chris Buckley — disinherited child of Latina maid
Kristol per — Kritsol fils — Kristolnacht
This is like crack to us SadlyNaughts, no? Sady, yes!
8:30 AM in Cairo. Overnight battle in Liberation Square: 5 dead, 15 wounded by gunfire; 800 injured.
I just sent an e-mail to the White House.
Back to Egypt. This is Reality Television….
Kristol per — Kritsol fils — Kristolnacht
Excellent!
Ah, fuck it. Nobody wants to read my stoned rantings.
But! I have another idea for a blog. It involves pictures of cats with humorous sayings on them.
The pictures, not the cats, although I suppose that could be entertaining, too.
N-Pod — J-Pod — Jo-butt Load-berg
Nobody wants to read my stoned rantings.
Oh, please, we think your stoned rantings are teh hawt. Newsletter, etc.
Nobody wants to read my stoned rantings.
Untrue.
Nobody wants to read my stoned rantings.
I get visitors, no reason you can’t.
Nobody wants to read my stoned rantings.
Not true!
I remember your writing about Branson, rehabing yer leg, art museums, music, movies, Missouri and Kansas, Ozarksm food, libraries, kittehs, libraries. Face it, T&U: You’re funny and interesting and eclectic. You write it stoned (I’ll read it stoned) and a good time will be had by all.
ALL – ONE – GUY.
Kübler-Ross
Kübler-Rose
Kübler-Rocks
Shit. All the really good ones are gone, plus I’m pretty sure I suck rotten eggs at this … but when has that ever stopped me before?
Veil – Reference – PENIS.
Twee – Squee – WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
WSJ – NYT -WTF?
Johnny Cash – Johnny Paycheck – Eddie Money.
Cthulhu – Nyarlathotep – Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Leni Riefenstahl – Völkischer Beobachter – YouTube Downfall parodies.
Feh – Meh – Teh.
Nobody wants to read my stoned rantings.
True, this. What people really want to read is drunken rantings, committed to the screen in that fleeting moment of lucidity when the larychmose phase is coming to an end and self-awareness kicks in for a few seconds before the final downward spiral into oblivion.
Or so I hear from a friend.
I’d volunteer to be Exhibit A, but that slot’s been claimed directly above.
Should any of the sci-fi fanz out there give a flying fuck at a rolling dough-nut, this piece of crap might be fun to poke holes at or in.
I haven’t the psychic fortitude to pick even the most obvious parts apart, & it is slowly rotting on the PJMedia vine. But try this:
As if a “gun-loving libertarian accountant, &c.” isn’t (as well as being lame authorial projection) a personal & political statement to begin w/. If you don’t want to be panned on the basis of your politics (We can imagine what a swell scribe he is, anyway.) keep your fingers off the keyboard & your mouth shut, schmuck.
Bet the comments are amusing, but haven’t dared.
drunken rantings
Yes. Immediacy. Too effing much polishing/re-writing/short-term memory loss when typing on the weed. (I am informed.)
larychmose phase
Something to do w/ a tree?
Doesn’t matter ’cause Reagan woulda swooped in made everything perfect.
One of Steve Reich’s more melancholy pieces.
I don’t know what he’s titled his opus, and can’t be arsed to find out, but I suggest The Big Tough Strong Heroic Guy Who Beat the Mean Old Government and Also His Parents and That Bully From Third Grade, Because He’s So Much Cooler and Smarter Than Them And (wheeeze, wheeeeeeeze). I think that title could apply to lots of libertarian fantasy novels.
Seriously, I like the genre. Why does it attract so many morons? And what kind of regulations are there to deal with in Alabama? Seriously, just don’t sell land to any black folks and you should be all set.
Jesus Christ, speaking of impotent man-children:
NEWT GINGRICH: Reagan would have. Reagan would have had — Reagan would have thought about and studied radical Islam and Reagan would have had a strategy and would have pursued it.
In the wingnut blather about Egypt, I’m sensing a bit of nostalgia for the first Bush term. Back then, they could talk about the evil, scary Muslims and how we needed to wipe them off the face of the earth, and people listened. They got drunk on all the fear and hatred they created. Then they proved how fucking incompetent they were at running a war and oh yeah the economy got in the way, and suddenly people weren’t in the mood for that bullshit. So their carnage-boners have been basically wilting for five years now, and they needed a way to get their hate on. Egypt was the perfect opportunity. Filthy, scary Muslims breaking shit and attack people! Maybe they’re terrorists! Obviously, we need to Do Something, preferably a Something that fattens up the Complex and lets them bathe in the glory of dead war casualties once more. Bunch of fuckers.
Reagan would have thought about and studied
No further comment required.
Too effing much polishing/re-writing
Craftsmanship, babe.
short-term memory loss
Huh? Did you say something just a moment ago?
(I am informed.)
I am the walrus.
NEWT GINGRICH: Reagan would have. Reagan would have had — Reagan would have thought about and studied radical Islam and Reagan would have had a strategy and would have pursued it.
Is he fucking high? The decade of radical Islam’s coming-of-age happened to be the decade of Reagan’s government in the U.S. He had absolutely no policy to deal with it, or any clue how to deal with it, or any desire to come up with a policy.
I am the walrus.
Donny, you’re out of your element!
8:30 AM in Cairo. Overnight battle in Liberation Square: 5 dead, 15 wounded by gunfire; 800 injured.
Fuck me, beginning to look depressing… whether its the last hurrah of the regime, or a start of a more serious fightback???
As the missus is out working there at the moment (but away from Cairo), I’ve been watching Al Jazeera (?) for what seems like 24 hours. Gets a bit repetitive, but at least there is no god-damn yachting world clips like CN-fucken-N….
This is shameless; Roger L. Simon finds a self-described secular, libertarian and pro-Bush blogger from Egypt and interviews him. Because, of course, a secular libertarian pro-Bush blogger’s going to be very much in touch with the way the rest of Egypt feels.
It’s interesting, because it’s a case in point of how the “echo chamber” works. Conservative media does report the news on the ground, but only by interviewing people who are politically acceptable to them (like this guy). The thing is, at least in the U.S. (probably not in this case) the people politically acceptable to them usually get their news and biases from watching conservative media in the first place. So it’s a giant feedback loop.
T&U, do your blog if you want to. I’ve no doubt many S,N’ers will stop by.
I like to think of my blog as the written equivalent of a graceful ballerina dancing a beauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuutiful dance while getting a violent bout of diarrhea and shitting all over the stage. It’s a car wreck of randomness and attention-whoring. But people are kind enough to visit once in awhile.
Also too, I have no idea if people think I’m funny or not but I amuse the HELL out myself and in the end that’s all that matters, no?
Also too, you’ve said some things over the months since I’ve been here that have had keyboard-ruining properties. So joke ’em if they can’t take a fuck.
Vagina – Vajayjay – Vajazzle
Glubdammit, as soon as I leave for work you guys break out the good stuff.
(Just like mrs. bughunter.)
And really? Nobody thought of “Duskull — Psyduck — Dudeskull”??
You slackers.
M. Bouffant said,
February 3, 2011 at 10:49
Interesting; I saw the article a few days ago but didn’t even bother to click.
There’ve been plenty of authors who use sci-fi as a vehicle for their politics before, and conservatives doing it is nothing new (if you count Heinlein as conservative, there’s him: Orson Scott Card definitely counts). So the premise that “sci-fi is getting more conservative” is false. Sci-fi’s what it always has been, plenty of room for everyone. Some of the conservatives are pretty good reads too.
For this particular article:
What sounds out of place here is the notion that if there were big scary monsters running around Alabama, the monster-hunters would still be getting harassed by petty regulations. In a state of emergency, petty rules and regulations are the first thing to go out the window and those who (rightly or wrongly) try to leave them in place get stampeded and trampled by public opinion. (Look at the 9/11 aftermath).
Sounds like the classic conservative fantasy of heroes being prevented from winning the war by bureaucrats tying their hands and stabbing them in the back, which is why people think it’s bullshit.
“Also too, I have no idea if people think I’m funny or not but I amuse the HELL out myself and in the end that’s all that matters, no? ”
Sex with boyfriend?Sex with hubby?Sex with self.
Sounds like the classic conservative fantasy of heroes being prevented from winning the war by bureaucrats tying their hands and stabbing them in the back
It’s more like a tired 1950’s b/w SciFi Horror Movie trope, which is why people think its BS, except those who feed on BS and see themselves in the role of the “teen who is the only person to see the threat and must overcome both the monster and the bureaucracy.”
And: It’s NOT SF. It never was. If people are still writing that, then its either a) a screenplay, which hasn’t produced decent SF since Blade Runner imo, or b) amateur crap that gets published only in fanfic sites or vanity press.
I think if more people read fantasy and SF classics like those from Asimov, Heinlein, Delany, Sterling, Banks and Reynolds*, we’d have a better informed society. Or at least better SF on TV, dammit.
*budgeted myself to six when I composed the sentence; many more would fit. Insert your favorite F/SF authors here.
Ooh, ooh. Forgot Wilson and Shea. EVERYONE should read Wilson and Shea.
Stoned.
I came to SF via movies and TV (Star Wars, Star Trek, Firefly and the like). Of the authors you listed, I’ve only ever read Heinlein (and only “Starship Troopers”).
But one author that shouldn’t be overlooked: H. G. Wells. I read “War of the Worlds” when I was ten, loved it, still love it and have yet to see a movie adaptation I really like. “The Time Machine” wasn’t bad either.
And finally (after going back and finding MB‘s OP): Mr. Richardson’s SF choices are getting more conservative, the genre is not. He’s holding up Card, Pournelle and two newcomers that he likes as cherrypicked examples. Typical winger fallacy.
Can’t say I’ve seen Firefly and the like; don’t watch TV anymore. But lots of people liked Firefly so I’ll give it the benefit of doubt. Stargate SG-1 had moments, but wasn’t consistent.
If you’re interested in reading more SF, I suggest you start with Frank Herbert’s Dune. It’s thick but it’s riveting. (Cue DKW.) His novellas (Dosadi Experiment, Whipping Star, Hellstrom’s Hive etc) are shorter, if you don’t want to read a tome. Herbert is among the most imaginative of classic SF, and his works have aged well.
For more modern books, I highly recommend Peter F Hamilton. Start with his Nights Dawn trilogy. Epic and very approachable. Would make for a great screenplay if not for the fact that his novels would take up 50 hours each on the screen.
I show the government as lumbering and bureaucratic at best, and cold-bloodedly ruthless at worst.
This food is terrible. And such small portions!
,,,would you guys read it? Be honest.
As much as I’m in the “everyone should have a blog” crowd, I gotta say that you should give a bit of thought to why you’re doing it. If it’s just as an outlet for the crazy thoughts that pop into your head after a joint or two – by all means go right ahead. You don’t even have to tell anyone about its existence. N__B’s previous blog was almost a year old before he let anyone found out about it. And then Google killed it with bad spam recognition software. Good times.
The crowd here is very supportive, so if you do go ahead you’ll have a pre-built rogues gallery of commenters from day one.
TL;DR version: Yes I would read your stoned rantings but I’m not sure if that should make any difference to whether you start blogging or not.
It’s thick but it’s riveting. (Cue DKW.)
That’s what your mom said.
Picking thru the mangoes, I see that the Red Staters are big fans of the Military SF subgenre (shocking, I know) and Baen Books, both of which are quite fond of tired tropes and easy markets for hacks. They’re like romance novels on testosterone, great entertainment but shallow and forgettable.
On, now SG-1 I loved. Not that it’s a timeless classic or anything, just something I really enjoyed. I haz a big sad that all ten seasons were just taken down from Hulu.
Dune, I’ve read, as well as the sequel. I agree, incredibly good book, but the advice I’ve gotten is pretty much “read the third one and then stop.”
Hamilton I’ve never heard of, but will look up and put him on my list. The last two sci-fi authors I discovered (both modern) were John Scalzi (Old Man’s War) and Kristine Kathryn Rusch (Retrieval Artist). Only read the first of both series, nothing extraordinary but still pretty enjoyable. They both made for good ways to kill time on an airplane.
Here’s a ripe one:
Science Fiction tends towards conservative, because it’s always about the stark truth.
Caveat – Oversimplifying generalizations follow.
Genre fiction is inherently conservative. It is meant to be entertaining first, everything else is gravy. Under those conditions stories have a tendency to not challenge their readers assumptions.
Consider how many fantasy/science fiction stories/series/settings/universes have some sort of utopian Golden Age paradise in the past that the current crop of characters are trying to return to.
Consider how the concept of bearing arms for self-defense.
Consider the glorification of all things military.
Sure there are exceptions, but fantasy and science fiction are too filled with Galtian individualists who succeed despite bureaucratic rules and regulations – individuals who are marked for greatness due to their genetic heritage – to be anything other than conservative.
Consider how horrible grammar have I am using in comment previous to the one reading now you are.
Reagan would have thought about and studied radical Islam and Reagan would have had a strategy and would have pursued it.
is he fucking kidding? reagan couldn’t stay awake during cabinet meetings! i’m pretty sure studying the intricacies of middle eastern thought and politics would be waaaaay to tedious to keep his attention. although i guess maybe radical islam would give him nightmares, forcing him to stay awake…mommy!
Sure there are exceptions, but fantasy and science fiction are too filled with Galtian individualists who succeed despite bureaucratic rules and regulations
I think that’s popular fiction in general, actually. It’s a time-honored way of making the hero stand out in heroic fashion.
Heck, “going Galt” happened in the Illiad, look at Achilles.
I think that’s popular fiction in general, actually.
Sure. Anything done with the primary intent of entertainment, like your mom, will be like this. A tendency for the good guys to wear white hats and the bad guys to have evil-twin goatees.
Again, generalization.
What do you read, DKW? I don’t find your observations hold generally, at all. Except, again, for the crap that makes it to movies and TV.
One more time: That is NOT representative of literary science fiction.
Unfortunately for the genre, one has to actually read a novel in order to consume real SF. Thus the widespread misperceptions.
At best, TV and movie SF are representative of a pulp, military SF subgenre. And unfortunately, it’s what most people think of when they hear the term “science fiction.” Star Trek, while fun, did more than any other single franchise to cement that misperception.
Go find anything by Samuel R. Delaney. None of them are easy reads. It’s as good as anything by James Joyce, Herman Hesse, etc.
When she takes her teeth out she’s better than your mom.
re: Heinlein as a conservative.
His most blatantly political book is For Us, The Living (published post-humously, but written very very early in his career). It’s filled with outright lectures, even including nonsense like “if you have a hundred units of cash and distribute it thusly,,,”. There are some concepts in there that are quite different from your usual conservative/libertarian world view.
If it’s conservative, it’s pre-Hayek-ian conservative. A pro-Welfare State Libertarianism.
I’ve not read Rand’s We The Living which seems to be referenced in the title of the novel, so maybe my background isn’t deep enough to discuss it sensibly. And I am not going to. Fuck Ayn Rand with fire held in a man’s hand. Anyways, yeah. For Us, The Living. Horribly shitty book with a ridiculous concept used solely to allow the author to string together a bunch of political lectures.
I think that’s popular fiction in general, actually. It’s a time-honored way of making the hero stand out in heroic fashion.
I am so going to write a thriller where the hero is an ad hoc committee whose heroic knowledge of parliamentary procedure and careful attention to detail and nuance saves the day!
What do you read, DKW? I don’t find your observations hold generally, at all.
Au contraire. He qualified his comment with “popular entertainment”. I concur with his observation. The crap written for the masses with an eye towards making a buck is almost always devoid of artistry and is written to the lowest common denominator in order to maximize an audience and a profit.
Like his mom.
And my tag fails.
Reagan would have thought about and studied radical Islam and Reagan would have had a strategy and would have pursued it.
Gingrich lost me at “study”.
No. Wait. Here’s where he lost me:
Reagan would have thought
Of all the mindless fucking cowboys ever to sit in the Oval, Reagan is in a class nearly by himself.
What do you read, DKW?
Pr0n mags. For teh articles.
I don’t recall reading any Delany – Dhalgren sounds familiar, but if I did read it, it was decades ago.
But, Frank Herbert? Dune? Address my points, lib:
1. Historic Golden Age Utopia? Maybe a pre-Butlerian Jihad one?
2. Second Amendment issues. Like there are any good guys from Dune that evar go unarmed.
3. Glorification of teh military.
4. Rugged individualist who suceeds against Big Government – and only he can do it by virtue of his lineage having no mixing with inferior bloodlines.
Check and mate.
When she takes her teeth out she’s better than your mom.
Yeah, well your granny is mean and jumps around all the time.
But, Frank Herbert? Dune? Address my points, lib:
Sure.
The novel is an allegory to Lawrence of Arabia, which pretty much dismisses your points….
Heck, “going Galt” happened in the Illiad, look at Achilles.
Yes, and man-boy love lured him into socialism and his ultimate demise. It’s a real parable for our times.
The novel is an allegory to Lawrence of Arabia, which pretty much dismisses your points….
wev. The novel is about a shitty little spoilt brat who, because of his racial background, is entitled to rule the universe. A feudal universe where all the power rests in trade and commerce. Totes not conservative at all.
The novel is about a shitty little spoilt brat who, because of his racial background, is entitled to rule the universe.
No, the novel is about a man who sees oppression by an empire that is run by capitalists and sets out to prove the inherent flaws by harnessing the ecology of a strategic planet and turning it against them.
It’s practically Lord of the Rings.
The novel is an allegory to Lawrence of Arabia
The paperback edition that I read as a boy was prefaced by a letter from Frank Herbert explaining that he was not founding a new religion and did not wish to receive any more applications for membership. God bless us, every one.
“I am so going to write a thriller where the hero is an ad hoc committee whose heroic knowledge of parliamentary procedure and careful attention to detail and nuance saves the day!”
Apollo 13?
Anyways, yeah as actor mentioned – my generalization is based on the notion of it being popular literature. Stuff intended primarily for entertainment and escapism. Lends itself to conservative tropes.
And again, generalizations. There are always exceptions, for example just about anything by Teddy the Fish.
Finally, the point about SF being young-ish as a genre and how it’s difficult to do real literary stuff in the commercialized ghetto of science fiction. Sure, acknowledged. I’m not trying to criticize science fiction – I’m a big fan. Just trying to acknowledge that escapist shit is inherently conservative, and that’s because conservative ideas are easier.
Star Trek, while fun, did more than any other single franchise to cement that misperception.
And this is where hardcore Trekkies would segway into the debate of “Starfleet is NOT military.” “Yes it IS.” “No it ISN’T.” Etc, etc, etc.
For Us, The Living sounds like something I should read, also too, if only for the “pro-welfare state libertarian” thing. That piques my interest.
I am so going to write a thriller where the hero is an ad hoc committee whose heroic knowledge of parliamentary procedure and careful attention to detail and nuance saves the day!
Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy?
Just trying to acknowledge that escapist shit is inherently conservative, and that’s because conservative ideas are easier
What burns my oil is when a perfectly good story with a dark ending, like “Super-Toys Last All Summer Long” gets turned into a happy-ending piece of shit like “A.I.”
I am so going to write a thriller where the hero is an ad hoc committee whose heroic knowledge of parliamentary procedure and careful attention to detail and nuance saves the day!
I’d read it.
That piques my interest.
Did I mention that it’s a shitty book? Because it is. And I actually like Heinlein too.
Also, more than a little misogynist. It was written in the late 30’s, so that may account for why – but that doesn’t make it a less cringe inducing read.
Star Trek, while fun, did more than any other single franchise to cement that misperception.
Those are the same asshats who think Kirk is better than Picard
*ducking and running*
Shorter Irky Irksome:
Yes. He BLAMES him!
Yes. He BLAMES him!
Like History’s Greatest Monster, only faster!
Those are the same asshats who think Kirk is better than Picard
In Kirk’s defense, he boned a lot more space ladies. That’s a plus, right?
In Kirk’s defense, he boned a lot more space ladies. That’s a plus, right?
Which fed into the sub-military fetishism.
For the point of pop sci-fi being inherently conservative because conservative ideas are easier – not necessarily. The whole concept of Star Trek was to make a progressive utopia in which the problems of the present (racism, nuclear age, etc) no longer exist. And somehow, they end up managing to make an economy that runs without money… but never get into explaining how that works. All the big problems of today have been solved, but they never really explain how: you just accept it and enjoy the show. Conservatives don’t have a monopoly on simplistic utopianism.
Also, more than a little misogynist. It was written in the late 30?s, so that may account for why – but that doesn’t make it a less cringe inducing read.
If I could read half of James Bond (novels, not movies), I probably won’t have trouble getting through this.
Kirk – Picard – Janeway
All the big problems of today have been solved, but they never really explain how: you just accept it and enjoy the show.
Yea, but it’s a construct, giving as a postulate of the society and therefore never explained (anymore fully than how dilithium crystal can warp space…altho eventually that gets explained at Trek-cons 🙂 )
And the problems do exist. Racism, bigotry, the Cold War, and so on, but they’re presented as other people’s problems to be solved by Kirk holding a phaser to the appropriate party’s head and saying “Fix it. Our way. Now.”
The aims might have been noble but the execution is straight outta Limbaugh.
Alt. Shorter Irksome:
Those are the same asshats who think Kirk is better than Picard
The only Starfleet captain worth speaking of is Captain Jonathan Archer. End of discussion.
The only Starfleet captain worth speaking of is Captain Jonathan Archer.
Boy, talking about wimping out…
Knives.
I’ve gotten some intensely negative reviews of the ol’ book from regressives who picked up on its subtle yet compelling anti-authoritarian, ‘you fucking glibertarians don’t know shit from Shinola’ message.
Those folks don’t like criticism for the same reason they don’t like humor: insight is bad.
I’ve gotten some intensely negative reviews of the ol’ book from regressives who picked up on its subtle yet compelling anti-authoritarian, ‘you fucking glibertarians don’t know shit from Shinola’ message.
I wondered if that would happen…frankly, I thought your perspective on society was fairly unique for a book purportedly about zombies, and I liked the fact that you were willing to raise a little heck, sacrificing a few sales to people who wouldn’t know better anyway.
This in: re sci-fi politics, incidentally.
End of discussion.
I’d rather do Janeway. And to highlight my earlier point about nevar being able to compete with actor’s perversion – he’d rather do Pike.
Kirk – Picard – Janeway
well done. how did we miss that before?
The Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. – The Reverend Billy Graham – The Reverend Horton Heat
well done. how did we miss that before?
I know, right?
Ferdinand Marcos – Corazon Aquino – Michelle Malkin
he’d rather do Pike.
We talking about the young virile Pike of the movie or the shriveled raisinette of the series?
From Irksome:
“Note that by saying the Muslim Brotherhood “must reject violence and recognize democratic goals”, the White House is presupposing that the Muslim Brotherhood accepts violence and does not recognize democratic goals.”
Soooo, if I say Irksome must reject violence and recognize democratic goals, I am presupposing that Irksome accepts violence and does not recognize democratic goals. Can I get on CNN now?
We talking about the young virile Pike of the movie or the shriveled raisinette of the series?
Considering the infections you’re carrying, probably the first followed by the second a few weeks later.
Actor, I appreciate your attempt to pluck the fuse you ignited. Let me try to explain the Kirk/ Picard thing.
Picard is pretty good. A thoughtful, firm leader, always using his intelligence to guide events away from violence and conflict, but never hesitant in the face of an active threat. He interacts with all peoples and creatures with the same even-handed approach, sensitive to their cultural and organic peculiarities; a perfect champion for all that is good and strong in mankind.
Kirk fucks the green girl with the big tits. Then he beats up the alligator monster.
I’m sorry, there’s no contest here.
Maria from Metropolis – Teh Crushinator – Glenn Reynold’s customized Real Doll
And the problems do exist. Racism, bigotry, the Cold War, and so on, but they’re presented as other people’s problems to be solved by Kirk holding a phaser to the appropriate party’s head and saying “Fix it. Our way. Now.”
Messianic liberalism. Yes, I see… it’s the basic psychology of the neocons who started out as Democrats and became Republican circa the 1970s.
I’m sorry, there’s no contest here.
Which part of *ducking and running* made you think I’d even try to defend my choice?
I mean, Kirk bangs anonymous Vegas keno girls. Picard gets stabbed in the heart, and still manages to bag Michelle Phillips, Jennifer Hetrick, J C Brandy, Famke Jannsen, Gates McFadden AND Donna Murphy!
You look at quantity. *I* look at quality…
OK, except for DK-W’s mom, but she has a bulk rate.
it’s the basic psychology of the neocons who started out as Democrats and became Republican circa the 1970s.
I think they espoused the liberalism solely as a way to get laid, figuring all them hippie chicks would put out if they slapped on pointed ears and said how logical things were.
Not realizing the ears didn’t change the fact they were small-penised assholes.
Those are the same asshats who think Kirk is better than Picard
Whatevs. The important thing is we all know Jake would kick Wesley’s ass.
Actually the number of long-haired dirty F. hippies was always quite small — the peace movement was not much larger than the teatard movement. Most of the so-called ex-radicals were never radicals, they were lumpenproles then as now. Which goes to show that a vocal minority, as long as it’s white, can change the way things happen.
I would be honored if you would escort me. (Then buy me drinks)
Expensive date, she is drinking for two now.
“Note that by saying the Muslim Brotherhood “must reject violence and recognize democratic goals”, the White House is presupposing that the Muslim Brotherhood accepts violence and does not recognize democratic goals.”
That would be disappointing, because the Muslim Brotherhood explicitly rejects violence and advocates for democracy. It sat out the first rounds of the current protests because the leadership thought they were too divisive.
Obviously I disagree with some of their other positions, but the definition of democracy is not “zero political rights for anyone that I disagree with”. Erik and his conservative friends are essentially saying that we should prevent democracy in Egypt because we suspect that some of the democratic opposition is secretly not 100% pro-democracy. If that is the bar, he just disqualified himself.
Of course what he means is, the only good muzzie is a dead muzzie.
Jake would kick Wesley’s ass
Heh. Totally.
actor, Jeffrey Hunter? He was the original.
DK-W, Alfred Bester, The Stars My Destination.
Actually the number of long-haired dirty F. hippies was always quite small — the peace movement was not much larger than the teatard movement.
True, but then the neo-con-abes weren’t movement radicals then, either. They believed the movement was bigger than it actually was, and so assumed easy pickings.
“…Messianic liberalism. Yes, I see… it’s the basic psychology of the neocons who started out as Democrats and became Republican circa the 1970s.”
Chris, you are so smart it scares me.
Sometimes I try to imagine a world in which God lets Jesus off the hook (long before the whole cross thing, see), maybe because Jesus has an amazing glimpse of Christians Future, so Jesus gets to be a carpenter and get married. And he still has a sensibility – for example, he thinks his daughter is terrific, so he decides that she and all the other little girls should get to go to school, and maybe even wait till they’re 16 before they get married. And he persuades everyone in the region that life is better if nobody is hungry, so everyone gives some of their food to the food bank. Later on, he’s still building furniture and stuff, and then he’s the best grandpa ever, and later than that, he dies peacefully in his sleep with umpteen dozen fat great-grandbabies around. The end. I guess I’m not the messianic type.
actor, Jeffrey Hunter? He was the original.</I?
Ooooh, I forgot about the inset episode!
Yes. I'd do Jeffrey Hunter. We could compare blue eyes in the dim glow of a couple of lit Marlboros.
Oof, actor, tag fail distracts from the exquisite beauty of your Jeffrey Hunter word-picture. Now I am thinking about the sound-track. A Ken Burns-type fiddle solo?
Same basic logic as the guys screaming “why won’t they condemn 9/11?” at Muslims who’ve been doing exactly that for ten years.
I think Obama kind of has to. The name “Muslim Brotherhood” is such a bogeyman over here that he had to be seen as publicly hectoring them and demanding that they stop being so bad, before he could give them any kind of an olive branch. He probably knew better, but you know how it is.
Wow my tag-typing sucks today…
I guess I’m not the messianic type.
I dunno. Do the fat great-grandbabies have frikkin’ laser beams coming out of their eyes?
A Ken Burns-type fiddle solo?
I sorta had something more Sinatra-y in mind.
Edison – Eisenstein – Michael Bay
Nostradamus – Edgar Cayce – Criswell
Jesus gets to be a carpenter and get married. And he still has a sensibility – for example, he thinks his daughter is terrific, so he decides that she and all the other little girls should get to go to school, and maybe even wait till they’re 16 before they get married.
The Last Temptation of Christ: Jesus has a vision of leading a normal life, married to Mary Magdalene and with kids, and decides he’d rather be crucified.
This, basically.
The Muslim Brotherhood is a fact of life, you can’t change it by wishing it away. I’d point out though that even though France, Britain and America had democratic governments already in the early nineteenth century, you had to wait over a hundred years (1944 for France) before women even had the right to vote. For other social issues, like gay rights, it took even longer.
I for one am ready to try this “let them evolve at their own pace” thing, even if I might not like the immediate result as much as I like America or France. Trying to force modernization on them via puppet governments won’t work: ask the Shah in Iran or the PDPA in Afghanistan.
The Last Temptation of Christ: Jesus has a vision of leading a normal life, married to Mary Magdalene and with kids, and decides he’d rather be crucified.
Probably the smart choice.
He’s doin’ it wrong.
Larkspur said,
February 3, 2011 at 18:09
I love the alternate history. Care to turn it into a novel? It might piss off as many people as the Da Vinci Code.
Care to turn it into a novel?
It’s been floated…
I assume The Last Temptation of Christ is the movie, which I have not seen, but probably should.
…off the hook… Yeah, I know. Imagine smooshing two stories together – Groundhog Day and Jesus Story. The hook, no the cross, no the gibbet, no the Glenn Beck marathon…. God keeps forsakin’ the poor dude over and over and over.
Apparently, in urban fantasy it is really odd to have a main character who is a gun-loving, anti-authoritarian, stay-off-my-lawn libertarian accountant, who ends of working for a group of Alabama contractors
Nothing says exciting like contract accounting in Alabama.
Nothing says exciting like contract accounting in Alabama.
“But wait! There’s a premature debit to the retainered billable hours on the part of the architect!
That means that the butler is part of the conspiracy! Quick! To the Taurus!”
El Manquésito said,
February 2, 2011 at 20:28
Lester Young -> Bird -> Kenny G
NOOOOOO!!!
DK-W, Alfred Bester, The Stars My Destination.
Added to queue, but only because Al Bester was a decent goalie for teh Leafs back in the day. d00d was short enough that he tucked himself right into the net.
Picard is CLEARLY more awesome than Kirk. I don’t understand why people don’t see this.
In Kirk’s defense, he boned a lot more space ladies.
You only think so because Picard doesn’t bone and tell.
For other social issues, like gay rights, it
tookis taking even longer.Fiqst for accuracy, alas.
I assume The Last Temptation of Christ is the movie, which I have not seen, but probably should.
The book is good, too, but it lacks the je ne sais quoi that the movie has from having an all dark-haired, mostly Jewish cast except for blond Willem DeFoe playing Jesus.
Missing the big sausage?
You dick.
Prick!
Thanks for the feedback, guys. I agree, drunk is better. Probably more cringeworthy, but that’s part of the point.
Sure there are exceptions, but fantasy and science fiction are too filled with Galtian individualists who succeed despite bureaucratic rules and regulations – individuals who are marked for greatness due to their genetic heritage – to be anything other than conservative.
Norman Spinrad dissected that in The Iron Dream. There’s also Michael Moorcock’s essay “Epic Pooh”, which you can actually read online.
The Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. – The Reverend Billy Graham – The Reverend Horton Heat
Hey! the Reverend Horton Heat is fucking awesome. He is not the nadir of some icky “descent of reverends” scenario. I would close that sequence out with Ted Haggard or that guy in Georgia who was putting his gay lovers on the church payroll.
Picard is CLEARLY more awesome than Kirk. I don’t understand why people don’t see this.
That’s why I like Kirk bettar. Seriously, Picard? Universe-wide expert on archaeology, half a dozen highly technical scientific fields, fencing and running marathons Such a brilliant master tactician that when assimilated by teh Borg, it’s all “these countless cultures that we’ve worked our way through have nothing on this guy!”. He’s like Doc Savage, only way more capable.
Kirk was always meat with a dash of devilish rogue and a thick topping of pompous self-importance. IOW, a character I find much easier to relate to.
The Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. – The Reverend Billy Graham – The Reverend Horton Heat
Hey! the Reverend Horton Heat is fucking awesome. He is not the nadir of some icky “descent of reverends” scenario. I would close that sequence out with Ted Haggard or that guy in Georgia who was putting his gay lovers on the church payroll.
How about The Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. – The Reverend Billy Graham – The Reverend Peter Popoff?
Plus what Spengler said.
Norman Spinrad dissected that in The Iron Dream.
Is that that book-within-a-book one? Hitler writes some novel or other?
Kinsey Report – Drudge Report – Minority Report
The Mrs –> Me –> The cutest dinosaur-obsessed kid EVAH!
We need to find a way to profit off that little dude — we’ll consider it future rent.
🙂
the Reverend Horton Heat is fucking awesome.
And playing in Salt Lake City this evening! We’re so there.
Kirk was always meat with a dash of devilish rogue and a thick topping of pompous self-importance. IOW, a character I find much easier to relate to.
Ah, I see, here’s the problem. I’m talking about who I’d rather *bang*, when you are talking about who you’d rather *be*.
We need to find a way to profit off that little dude — we’ll consider it future rent.
AAAAAH!
You know, he is going to hate you for this when he gets older. I am so glad YouTube didn’t exist when I was a child, for SO MANY reasons.
Well goooooolly!
And playing in Salt Lake City this evening! We’re so there.
I am sick with envy. Seriously though? Salt Lake City? That tops my list of “places i imagine the Reverend Horton Heat would want to avoid”
That tops my list of “places i imagine the Reverend Horton Heat would want to avoid”
I’d have thought so too, but he’s here about twice a year. Plays a little tiny club downtown. Always on school nights, though, which sucks but oh well. I bet he just does a quick show here on his way between real towns.
(SLC is actually much more cosmopolitan than the rest of Utah. Which means it’s still backwards and fucked up, but not as much as people think.)
pedestrian, I don’t even know what to say to that.
According to the Jerusalem Post, Huckabee addressed the controversial issue surrounding the disputed West Bank, saying, “It is inconceivable in many ways that we would have to even argue and debate whether or not Israelis could live in Israel, not just in parts of Israel but anywhere in Israel they wished to live.”
“I cannot imagine as an American being told that I could not live in certain places in America because I was Christian, or because I was white, or because I spoke English.
How about if we illegally annexed part of Canada and you were told you couldn’t live there because you weren’t Canadian? Fuckhole.
Ah, I see, here’s the problem. I’m talking about who I’d rather *bang*, when you are talking about who you’d rather *be*.
Well sort of. I wouldn’t want to *be* Kirk. I’d much rather be Picard and I’m not just saying that to get in your pants. He is objectively more awesome than anyone on any scale you can imagine. His first nemesis was someone who essentially had the same powers of God and Picard not only won each time they met, but often in spectacularly massive PWNAGE style. That’s also my problem with him as a fictional character.
I’d still prefer to bang Janeway though..
Yep, Iron Dream had Hitler emigrating to the US and writing SF. IIRC. For reasons cosmic or non existent I read it nearly in tandem with The Man in the High Castle. Doing that sucked me into a bizarre place where I was unsure just what was real history and what wasn’t. Maybe the drugs had something to do with it as well.
pedestrian said,
February 3, 2011 at 19:03
Oh, don’t get me started on Huckabee again…
The short list of
“places i imagine the Reverend Horton Heat would want to avoid”
1. Salt Lake City
2. The Betty Ford Clinic
3. Mecca
4. Pennsylvania Dutch country
5. Afghanistan
re: Anderson Cooper
I dunno why teh wingnuts all have such a hate-on for teh Vanderbilt boy. He’s white as white can be, has an extremely affluent background -basically he’s from the right circles. And he’s fucking hardcore, having had his start as an amateur journalist that assigned himself to war zones around the world. Motherfucker is so badass that he’d never shoot a man to watch him die, because that would be boring.
Plus, the dude knows how to handle a firearm!
I’d much rather be Picard and I’m not just saying that to get in your pants.
I’m not a mom, so I didn’t think you were.
I gotcha. But if I didn’t like people who were appallingly, mind-blowingly, unrealistically awesome, I’d have some self-esteem problems.
Oh, that’s nothing compared to some of the stories I shared on my now-almost-never-updated blog — and the pic I have of him with his finger shoved up his nose that I posted there and many other places.
Can’t wait to show that one to his prom date …
Pretty damn cute, Mark D.
C’mon, it’s easy: While Picard can get the business pro a good deal on a rental car, Kirk can get ME a good deal at a hotel!
Pretty damn cute, Mark D.
I’m impressed- he gives a shout-out to the Devonian! THE DEVONIAN!!
Picard is CLEARLY more awesome than Kirk.
It goes without saying, he’s bald!
And this is where hardcore Trekkies would segway into the debate of “Starfleet is NOT military.” “Yes it IS.” “No it ISN’T.” Etc, etc, etc.
To be fair, in Roddenberry’s original vision Starfleet was less so, it was the network that put the pressure on for more monsters and more militatistic action. Lowest common denominator once again.
Wow. My brain hurts.
What is the White House position on starship captains?
Politico, for example, says of the email that went out under Michelle Obama’s name, “The gaffe was enough to make you wonder whether the White House had simply cut and pasted Southern clichés to create the first lady’s announcement.”
Imagine the screaming if she said, “Charlotte’s right near the border with South Carolina, racism central!”
Gadzooks, they’re grasping for strawmen.
I have some “policy ideas” regarding this guy, too.
The Devil made him do it.
The thread at TDB was too serious to post that there.
Plus, EVERYBODY knows that Kansas City bbq is the best.
re SLC, fuck Utah.
Barbecue may be found only in Lockhart, TX. Anything else is crap.
Is that that book-within-a-book one? Hitler writes some novel or other?
Yep. It’s kind of strange to review because Spinrad does a good job emulating the cheesiest cliches of pre-New Wave militaristic science fiction. Is it good writing when you convincingly write in a bad style?
If I were gonna fuck a city, it would prolly be Charleston, SC.
re SLC, fuck Utah.
Two missionaries at a time! The anecdote about the guy seducing a pair of Mormon missionaries was hilarious.
Politico, for example, says of the email that went out under Michelle Obama’s name, “The gaffe was enough to make you wonder whether the White House had simply cut and pasted Southern clichés to create the first lady’s announcement.”
Seriously, these people are getting upset because the WH said something vaguely complimentary about Charlotte? What was she supposed to do instead, say it was a bland, boring dump? (Which is pretty much true).
I’m curious to see how the wingnuts will spin the prayer breakfast speech which was smarmy and pandering. Wingnuts usually love that shit, so…yeah…
Haven’t you heard, the second coming was much like that: Jesus just came quietly on the earth to spend some time here, and see how his teachings of love and sharing had progressed. We worked for the foodbank, homeless shelter and various charities helping poor and less fortunate.
Unfortunately, his second coming was in southern US in mid 50’s.
After ideas of sharing wealth and taking care of the poor came into the knowledge of House Un-American Activities Committee, he was branded as a communist stating “there is no Jesus Christ in heaven” (he was cut off, before he managed to continue the “I back here on earth.”) and lynched by a KKK mob in Alabama.
Wait, so Michelle Obama sends out an email saying Charlotte has “great BBQ” and people call it a gaffe because some self-appointed BBQ czars call some other city’s the “best?” The mix of poor reading skills, knee jerkery, and elitism makes me sad.
Plus, EVERYBODY knows that Kansas City bbq is the best.
Bless its heart.
I’m curious to see how the wingnuts will spin the prayer breakfast speech which was smarmy and pandering. Wingnuts usually love that shit, so…yeah…
They’ll go the classic route, saying he’s a secret Muslim who cursed the other attendees under his breath while feeding them halal meat products.
I can’t believe that there’s an answer to this question.
Wow. My brain hurts.
Whelp, there goes 2012. I can see the attack ads now.
“Michelle Obama thinks that North Carolina has great barbecue. Tell the Obamas that if they want good barbecue, they should go back to Chicago. Vote Republican.”
My entire office is now incapable of working, being convulsed in hysterics. It’s the hairnet, doncha know…
FYWP. Let’s try that again.
“What is the White House position on starship captains?”
I can’t believe that there’s an answer to this question.
Barbecue may be found only in Lockhart, TX. Anything else is crap.
If all you’ve had is white people barbecue, I guess that could be true.
The anecdote about the guy seducing a pair of Mormon missionaries was hilarious.
Indeed, it’s much more common that the missionaries seduce each other.
White people get the cilantro ratio just so.
Consider how horrible grammar have I am using in comment previous to the one reading now you are.
I thought Loughner was being held without bail.
White people are easier to barbecue, since you can tell how done they are by skin color.
Is it good writing when you convincingly write in a bad style?
Not sure it’s unintentional. Ever read Greenhouse Summer?
After ideas of sharing wealth and taking care of the poor came into the knowledge of House Un-American Activities Committee, he was branded as a communist
Hmm. Everyone here’s familiar with “It’s a Wonderful Life”? Nice warm Christmas movie with nice Christian undertones, described by Capra as made to combat a modern trend towards atheism?
Yeah, well, J. Edgar Hoover must’ve had his doubts, because it was one of many things identified as communist subversion by the FBI during the Red Scare. Good times.
We need to find a way to profit off that little dude — we’ll consider it future rent.
Child modeling. My daughter did it thru preschool
But be warned, you spend an awful lot of time on the road with a cranky kid.
“If all you’ve had is white people barbecue, I guess that could be true.”
Ironically, the best bbq joint in Lockhart is called “Black’s.” True dat.
I’d much rather be Picard and I’m not just saying that to get in your pants. He is objectively more awesome than anyone on any scale you can imagine.
BOOKMARKED!
I’m not a mom, so I didn’t think you were.
DK-W can’t despoil unbreeding wombs?
Ooooh, call the National
InseminatorEnquirer!It goes without saying, he’s bald!
This.
When I started losing my hair, I told my ex I would Picard long before I went bald.
AHAHAHAHAHAHA
When I travel, I find the best Bar-B-Q is always found at an independent BBQ restaurant. It is often different from the BBQ you grew up with and not what you were expecting. But any independent joint that has survived the pre-fab franchise onslaught is almost garaunteed to be fantabulous.
OK, can we just settle the debate here.
There is no “KC BBQ”. There is no “Charlotte BBQ”. There is no “Lockjaw TX BBQ”. THere is no MEMPHIS BBQ.
There is only meat burnt on an open flame anyplace but Burger King, and it’s all fucking awesome.
Besides…Fette Sau, Williamsburg Brooklyn and the rest of the country can suck it.
Spengler Dampniche, Author of God said,
February 3, 2011 at 20:24
Quick! To the Taurus!
AHAHAHAHAHAHA
Yeah, who would be silly enough to have the hero driving around in a classic Mustang or somesuch….what?
dammit.
Yeah, who would be silly enough to have the hero driving around in a classic Mustang or somesuch….what?
Or in law enforcement. What a silly concept!
To be honest though, (spoiler alert) one of the most heart wrenching parts of Rise Again was when the Mustang died.
When I travel, I find the best Bar-B-Q is always found at an independent BBQ restaurant.
Always. The sadder it looks on the outside, the better it is. It’s not open because it’s pretty.
There is no “KC BBQ”. There is no “Charlotte BBQ”. There is no “Lockjaw TX BBQ”. THere is no MEMPHIS BBQ.
There are regional variances in the rubs, the types of meat used, the sauces, etc.
Fette Sau just incorporates all of them into their menu.
…tendency for the good guys to wear white hats and the bad guys to have evil-twin goatees.
Cardboard characters are a signature of weak writing, no matter what genre (unless you’re going for camp or parody). Gotta have some sympathy for the devil.
So if you meet me, have some courtesy, have some sympathy, and some taste.
Use all your well-learned politesse or I’ll lay your soul to waste.
GET TO THE CHOPPA!
DK-W can’t despoil unbreeding wombs?
Interesting theory. Now if we can put together a good sample population of test wombs – say thirty or so, I’d be glad to do my part in the investigation. For Science! of course.
Rule: in fiction, when an absolutely stock, vintage automobile is introduced, it will be destroyed. The better its condition, the messier its demise.
Shorter K-Lo:
the bad guys to have evil-twin goatees.
Initially I misread that.
To be honest though, (spoiler alert) one of the most heart wrenching parts of Rise Again was when the Mustang died.
Uh, you’re thinking of (SPOILER ALERT) True Grit.
Fette Sau just incorporates all of them into their menu.
And uses them on BACON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And uses them on BACON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It’s Williamsburg. They use bacon for everything.
Cardboard characters are a signature of weak writing
I’m a scuba diver, and so naturally, when I heard that Clive Cussler wrote fiction, thrillers no less, that involved scuba diving, I had to read a few.
Wow.
I mean, wow. How crappy could it get? And yet, the guy’s written something like 30 books with really intriguing plot lines (three have been made into movies, I think), but damn, the characters suck moosecock.
It’s Williamsburg. They use bacon for everything.
And your problem is….?
Now if we can put together a good sample population of test wombs – say thirty or so, I’d be glad to do my part in the investigation.
Nuh uh, dude. Double blind study.
Meaning we have to blindfold K-Lo too for the first twenty nine times.
Rule: in fiction, when an absolutely stock, vintage automobile is introduced, it will be destroyed. The better its condition, the messier its demise.
Chekhov’s Chevy
My favorite spoiler alert of all time showed up on a Christian comments section talking about getting people to read the bibble:
“SPOILER: Jesus dies at the end”
I wish it was mine.
Chekhov’s Chevy
Sulu’s Subaru
Shit, I’m s-o-o far behind on this thread. I’m patiently jogging behind while it sprints away at breakneck speed. There’s no hope of catching up unless except to go into Pure Lurker Mode and read-read-read-read-read-read.
So as long as I’m Lurker Mode, I’m toodling off to Egypt again. This thread is one of those delightful wandering-all-over-the-place species. Much fun to read even if I can’t play too.
And your problem is….?
I’m just saying it’s not much of a leap. Although I’m glad the rest of the country has caught on to what we’ve known out here for a while–that bacon is delicious and nutritious.
“SPOILER: Jesus dies at the end”
But there’s a hint of a sequel…
Although I’m glad the rest of the country has caught on to what we’ve known out here for a while–that bacon is delicious and nutritious.
I know people from the Heartland.
Nutritious? Really?
Nutritious? Really?
Yes. We have a special enzyme that converts it into the nutritional equivalent of kale by volume.
Yes. We have a special enzyme that converts it into the nutritional equivalent of kale by volume.
Blanched kale, sauteed with lardons, garlic, and onions, and served with a side of white beans would be an awesome dinner.
Random Comment- Foodie Pr0n Comment- Foodie Pr0n thread
Rule: in fiction, when an absolutely stock, vintage automobile is introduced, it will be destroyed.
Does this only work for automobiles? How about Heidelberg platen letterpress machines? AFAF.
We have a special enzyme that converts it into the nutritional equivalent of kale by volume.
Must be one fucking huge molecule, cuz y’all keep needing those seat belt extenders on airplanes…
Blanched kale, sauteed with lardons, garlic, and onions, and served with a side of white beans would be an awesome dinner.
Needs moar bacon
James Bond did not smash every car he drove.
Fette Sau just incorporates all of them into their menu.
I’m sorry, but I thought Fette Sau was OK but nothing to write home about.
I have to laugh, though, at the idea. Mrs. Obama says Charlotte has “great barbecue” – so the wingnuts come out to defend the opposite point – that Charlotte barbecue is lousy.
Maybe this is the strategy the Obama’s should start following. Obama can praise various Republican figures, setting off a round of outraged contradictions from the wingies.
“I must acknowledge that Sarah Palin is a brilliant woman,” says Obama.
Next morning Michelle Malkin posts that “How dare he try to foist the naive and foolish Sarah Palin upon us????” She then analyzes video footage of “Sarah Palin’s Alaska” to calculate the value of the Palin families kitchen cabinets, to refute Palin’s claim to be “just a hockey mom.”
“John Bolton has a long an respectable career as a foreign policy expert,” says Obama.
Erik son of Erik immediately goes on the offensive, discredits Bolton as a dangerous war-mongering neo-con.
it could work!
Must be one fucking huge molecule, cuz y’all keep needing those seat belt extenders on airplanes…
5,000 calories of kale is still 5,000 calories.
James Bond did not smash every car he drove.
Jean Luc Picard broke every Enterprise he drove.
Kirk? Not so much!
Blanched kale, sauteed with lardons, garlic, and onions, and served with a side of white beans would be an awesome dinner.
Kale is also yummy with shallots and a little bacon grease.
How about Heidelberg platen letterpress machines – Varityper photocomposing machines – FYWP
I love the fact that when Mrs. Obama praises Charlotte barbecue, the wingnuts fall all over themselves rallying to the opposing view, which is that Charlotte barbecue is lousy.
This could be a great new tactic.
Obama could perhaps say, “I have to acknowledge that Sarah Palin is quite intelligent.” The next day, an outraged post appears from Michelle Malkin, castigating Obama for daring to foist such a naive and clueless personality on America.
He could compliment John Bolton’s long foreign policy career. Then Erick Son of Erik would come out and denounce Bolton as a neo-con warmonger.
it could work.
James Bond did not smash every car he drove.
This is true. Sometimes it was the bad guys who did the smashing.
Holy crap. The Rolling Stones are planning a 50th anniversary tour.
Talk about stopping in your tracks….
For all you food pr0nies, do you use most greens pretty much interchangeably or no?
Can’t we all just agree that anyplace East of the Mississippi and South of the Potomac has “great barbecue” and get along?
This could be a great new tactic.
I don’t think the Obamas should risk it. When you stare into teh st00pit, teh st00pit stares into you.
There need to be more slow chase scenes. A good author can add tension to any chase scene. I haven’t seen the movie but i have heard that in Bubba Ho Tep there is a chase scene of two people on walkers through a nursing home.
Ironically, the best bbq joint in Lockhart is called “Black’s.” True dat.
YOU LIE!
Gee, I hope they have some new material.
Sometimes it was the bad guys who did the smashing.
Another unique aspect of On her Majesty’s Secret Service (other than the Lazenby thing of course) is that the smashing is actual done by not-a-villain love interest as played by Diana Rigg.
Can’t we all just agree that anyplace East of the Mississippi and South of the Potomac has “great barbecue” and get along?
Kansas City is west of the Mississippi.
Kansas City is west of the Mississippi.
Yeah. We know.
I haven’t seen the movie but i have heard that in Bubba Ho Tep there is a chase scene of two people on walkers through a nursing home.
Best. Bruce. Campbell. Film. Ever.
Ossie Davis as JFK. Inspired!
No no no no. One can sub say, Kale for mustard greens. Watercress for arugula. Beet greens for chard. Endive for radichio.
Need to take into account bitterness, heft, swpiciness, earthiness, etc. Young weedhopper must watch and learn.
For all you food pr0nies, do you use most greens pretty much interchangeably or no?
Pretty much.
Movies are not books you click-fingered bastards!
No no no no. One can sub say, Kale for mustard greens. Watercress for arugula. Beet greens for chard. Endive for radichio.
I thought she was talking about kale/chard/mustard greens/beet greens type-stuff.
Money rape!
Yeah. We know.
I know you know. I’m just saying I can’t agree with this statement.
Maybe I need to get out of the house.
I’m actually a pretty good great cook, Pup. Believe it or not.
And the greens I was referring to were dark, leafy ones.
Gee, I hope they have some new material.
Actually…
“Get Off My Lawn”
“Flatulent Girl”
“(Can’t Get No) Bowel Traction”
“Angina”
“Gimme Pepto”
“Let’s Spend The Nap Together”
“Start Me Up (The AED Song)”
“Waiting On Depends”
Yeah, Diana Rigg. I can’t picture her any way but this
Yer welcome, you leches.
Movies are not books you click-fingered bastards!
Well okay but, what if the movie has Diana Rigg in it?
James Bond did not smash every car he drove.
Surprising, with all those martinis he downed!
For all you food pr0nies, do you use most greens pretty much interchangeably or no?
I treat the tougher, leafy Brassica varieties (collards, kale) interchangeably, and use escarole and chicory pretty interchangeably, but I’d have to answer no. Kale chips, though, should be in everyone’s repertoire.
I haven’t seen the movie but i have heard that in Bubba Ho Tep there is a chase scene of two people on walkers through a nursing home.
Get thee to Netflix! The movie starts out as a cheesy horror/comedy, and ends up an elegaic portrayal of aging in American society. I give it four and a half (out of five) nods of the naked noggin
And the greens I was referring to were dark, leafy ones.
I gotcha, girl. I’m actually prefer kale in soup and stuff like that, because it’s pretty…stiff?
The Rolling Stones are planning a 50th-anniversary tour that will also serve as a farewell tour, the Daily Mail reports. “They want to bow out on top of their game, and not short-change their fans,”
Did they actually SEE “Shine A Light”?????
Well okay but, what if the movie has Diana Rigg in it?
How high does she kick?
Yeah, Diana Rigg. I can’t picture her any way but this
I’ve always pitied Linda Thorson, just for that one photo. She was hot in her own right, but in a very different “Baby Spice” kind of way…
Oh, WP, why can’t you just get painfully sick and die.
Can’t we all just agree that anyplace East of the Mississippi and South of the Potomac has “great barbecue” and get along?
Nope. I live north of the Potomac and I’ve never had to cross the river to get great barbecue.
Another unique aspect of On her Majesty’s Secret Service (other than the Lazenby thing of course) is that the smashing is actual done by not-a-villain love interest as played by Diana Rigg.
Yes, one of many such aspects. I actually hadn’t seen it until pretty recently because I’d been told Lazenby didn’t have a very great portrayal of Bond. Man, good movie. And I think the last one that actually followed the novel it was adapted from.
“Ironically, the best bbq joint in Lockhart is called “Black’s.” True dat.
YOU LIE!”
OK. So, here’s the deal: Next time you want the best barbecue in Lockhart, fly to Austin, drive the 40 or so miles to Lockhart, then, turn around and drive back to Austin and eat at The Iron Works on Red River.
So no matter how much I ignore work, I’m still 300 posts behind. With that in mind I’ll offer the following:
The Duke — The Dude — Dudeskull
Also: how many people can say they watched a bald eagle being harassed by seagulls outside their office window?
Too: picked up a rental upright bass last night. I have all of three days to learn six pieces for my first jazz band practice on Sunday. Whee!
Beet greens for chard.
Pedantic Bastard is pedantic.
Yeah, Diana Rigg. I can’t picture her any way but this
Yer welcome, you leches.
Even better!
Yeah. And a lot of greens have an interesting almost rubbery texture. But in a pleasing way.
That’s really cool.
I’m actually prefer kale in soup and stuff like that, because it’s pretty…stiff?
Yeah. And a lot of greens have an interesting almost rubbery texture. But in a pleasing way.
Alright! You two are talking in some kind of code and it’s insulting that you can’t just say PENIS and DILDO….
Even better!
You magnificent Bastard!
Also: how many people can say they watched a bald eagle being harassed by seagulls outside their office window?
That’s awesome- I went to the banks of the Hudson last week and saw six of them near the Indian Point Nukular plant. Hopefully, the fish weren’t too radioactive- eagles shooting lasers from their eyes would make BIRDEMIC! look like a picnic!
Too: picked up a rental upright bass last night. I have all of three days to learn six pieces for my first jazz band practice on Sunday. Whee!
You can always go to band camp.
Ya know, usually when I do stuff like it is just a little bit on purpose. But this time, I swear I was just thinking of spinach and Swiss chard.
One time…at band camp…
But this time, I swear I was just thinking of spinach and Swiss chard.
I don’t care what the state of his chad was….
If you get it little wheels it’s easier to play walking bass lines.
If you get it little wheels it’s easier to play walking bass lines.
And if you attach a reel, you can go bass fishing.
One time…at band camp…
That line would have been totally, disturbingly different if it had involved an upright bass.
One time…at band camp…
That line would have been totally, disturbingly different if it had involved an upright bass.
Or a smallmouth bass.
Ew.
Reeders.
*tries very hard not to think of Rule 34*
fly to Austin, drive the 40 or so miles to Lockhart, then, turn around and drive back to Austin and eat at The Iron Works on Red Rive
Been there. I used to live in Austin, smedley, not long after IWB opened. Stopped in a couple times on the way back from a day at Hippie Hollow.
How about Heidelberg platen letterpress machines?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
And kale is good just about any way. Sauteed onion, garlic, and kale with salt, pepper, and a little oregano, then topped with feta makes for a good pizza, like a big flat spanakopita.
If you get it little wheels it’s easier to play walking bass lines.
But “rolling bass lines” just sounds wrong.
And kale is good just about any way
Especially on sale.
Also: how many people can say they watched a bald eagle being harassed by seagulls outside their office window
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=485919671260&set=a.76818846260.88866.619616260&ref=nf
Dunno if he’s got his privacy setting maxed – if you can’t see that, tell me and I’ll make a mirror.
I like my men like I like my greens: low-fat, green and covered in bacon fat.
low-fat, green and covered in bacon fat.
When can I find this low-fat bacon fat of which you speak? I’d be all over that stuff like ravens on road kill…
It’s time for Sadly, No! One Thread Mash-Up!
That line would have been totally, disturbingly different if it had involved an upright bass.
How about Heidelberg platen letterpress machines?
actor’s mom again
When can I find this low-fat bacon fat of which you speak?
You can’t find turkey bacon?
Entertaining trolling over at LGM. Althouse-related, so entertainingly stupid.
http://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2011/02/that-concept-free-speech-i-do-not-think-it-means
http://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2011/02/more-on-what-free-speech-means
I like my men like I like my greens: low-fat, green and covered in bacon fat.
I like my women like I like my coffee: weak, bitter, and old.
Reeders
I’m a brass man, myself.
I’d be on it like a monkey on a cupcake.
Actually, you know what? I’m not a big bacon-eater. I may it a handful of times a year. I mainly use the fat or lardon for flavorin’ stuff.
Fixed for accuracy.
turkey bacon
Communist.
I was gonna make a me/coffee joke the other day. Something about being hot, strong and bitter. Or at least give me strong and bitter.
Not sure it’s unintentional. Ever read Greenhouse Summer?
No. Just Iron Dream, Bug Jack Barron, and Child of Fortune (whose made-up slang was right on the border between fun and twee).
But Iron Dream is definitely emulating the kind of stuff that got pumped out by the dozens in magazines of the 40s and 50s and mostly (justly) forgotten.
Canadian bacon is low fat. For bacon. It is also bland and boring but one expects that Canadian bacon would be.
OK, can we just settle the debate here.
Sadly, no. BBQ seems to be as much Serious FUCKING Business as chili (and I’ve seen some scary chili argument threads in other forums).
I like my women like I like my coffee: weak, bitter, and old.
I like my men like I like my espresso: dark, intense, and topped with whipped cream and a little sprinkling of cocoa.
You can’t find turkey bacon?
Sure I can find it. Why the hell would I want to? That stuff ain’t groceries.
Fag Tail. FYWP, just because I’m blaming you.
Oh, I’ve got opinions. Very important ones.
I like bacon, but I don’t seem to fetishize it the way so many online folks do. Maybe it’s because I have a kosher-keeping friend and so I have to think about foods for entertaining that he can enjoy too.
As for kale– made some baked kale chips this morning, as it turns out. Dead easy to do and quite tasty.
“I was gonna make a me/coffee joke the other day. Something about being hot, strong and bitter. Or at least give me strong and bitter.
Wait till you hit 50 or so. The missus is hot all the damn time.
Sadly, no. BBQ seems to be as much Serious FUCKING Business as chili (and I’ve seen some scary chili argument threads in other forums).
Oh yes. Chili guys are hardcore.
I like my men like I like my espresso: dark, intense, and topped with whipped cream and a little sprinkling of cocoa.
I!
W?
Video?
I like my women like I like my coffee: ground up and in little baggies in the freezer.
Nonsense!
It bruises the coffee…
The fact is–The O’Reilly Factor–is fact free
Not the kind of hot I aspire to be. But I think I read something the other day about women with hot flashes being at lower risk for breast cancer…?
I like my men like I like my espresso: dark, intense, and topped with whipped cream and a little sprinkling of cocoa.
Y’know, how come I never see you and Poopyanus posting at the same time?
Wait till you hit 50 or so. The missus is hot all the damn time.
Hm. Apparently I got divorced a half decade too early…
It will come as no suprise to several people here that, IMHO, the best bacon is the stuff I make right here in casa Pupi-n-Ho.
Yeah weird hardcore chili mythology is weird
I like my women to be your mom.
Gary Ruppert said,
February 3, 2011 at 22:19
The fact is–The O’Reilly Factor–is fact free
I call fake Gary.
the best bacon is the stuff I make right here in casa Pupi-n-Ho.
Do I really have to make a “porking” joke here?
Weirder? Hardcore chili porn.
It will come as no suprise to several people here that, IMHO, the best bacon is the stuff I make right here in casa Pupi-n-Ho.
Do you have an electric smoker?
I like my women like I like my bourbon: frequently.
The President announced he is “praying for peace” and “looking for a new dawn in Egypt.”
That really helps! We needed decisive clarification of US foriegn policy’s differentiation between despotism and democracy.
Wow, he’s so spiritually guided, you’d almost think his favorite philosopher was Jesus…
Reverse cowgirl, I think.
As opposed to the position with bankers, buns-up kneeling.
re: Canadian bacon
Eggs Benedict. That is all.
Canadian bacon: the creative application of leftover luncheon meat
“Do you have an electric smoker?”
No, I have a finely tuned grill that works great for “cold smoking”.
This just in: Patti Davis is still hot.
No, I have a finely tuned grill that works great for “cold smoking”.
TIDOS Yankee weeps!
Harry Reid would enjoy it.
No, I have a finely tuned grill that works great for “cold smoking”.
I know a great alleyway in Williamsburg for that!
BTW: This is 1,038 (or thereabouts)
“Eggs Benedict. That is all.”
I want that NOW.