Althouse in Wonderland
“Toinette” Althouse (1788)
Ann Althouse, the shame of the University of Wisconsin Law School, thought that she could add light to the debate as to whether Harry Reid is a racist or not by using the definition of racism employed in the secret language that she speaks with her imaginary friends.
If by “racist” you mean somebody who would use other people’s feelings about race in a purely instrumental way to amass political power, then Harry Reid is a racist.
This is, of course, a most excellent definition because it would immediately render every civil rights activist who ever lived a racist thereby taking the whole the-liberals-are-the-real-racists trope to new and dizzying heights.
But the real fun comes when another right-wing law professor, Eugene Volokh, takes issue with Ann and tells her you can’t win arguments simply by making up new definitions of words. This pushes professor Althouse into full-splutter mode:
The reason why I put it that way is not because I saw that as a standard meaning. It is intended to express what I think is exactly what Reid was doing. The clause begins with “if.” Seen that way, I’m saying: If what Reid did is racist, Reid is a racist.
Well, that certainly settles that.
In a similar vein, let’s discuss whether Ann is an alcoholic or not. If by “alcoholic” you mean someone who drinks red wine from boxes, then Ann Althouse is an alcoholic. Now I know that this isn’t a standard definition of alcoholic. But this definition is intended to express exactly what I think Ann is doing, namely drinking boxed swill to get high. That’s why I said “if.” If someone who drinks boxed wine is an alcoholic, then Ann is an alcoholic. Not that I’m saying she drinks boxed wine or is an alcoholic, but if she did. . . etc.
Graduates of the University of Wisconsin Law School who took any courses from Ms. Althouse may cite this post in their request to have a pro-rata amount of their tuition refunded.
[h/t commenter Ted the Slacker]
Hey, don’t knock box wine. They come in handy because the guys who collect the recycling can’t tell how much of a lush I really am.
Even looking at her own wacky definition for a minute, seeing as how this quote from the 2008 election wasn’t even revealed publicly until a few days ago, I’m stumped as to how Reid was using it to “amass political power.” I’m going to chalk it up to the always-dependable Liberal Mind-Control Rays/Beams, that Reid used to send his private quote into peoples’ minds and make them vote Democrat. Thus, political power, central to my point, also.
we can play that game too.
“If” Ann drinks this boxed wine, Ann is a drunk.
“Villains!” she shrieked, “dissemble no more! I admit the deed! — tear up the planks! — here, here! — it is the beating of my hideous heart!”
If my aunt had a cork up her butt she’d be a wine bottle.
“If” Ann has sex with goats she’s a, well you know……
If we had ham we could have ham and eggs.
If we had a chicken.
And a cock.
What did Harry Reid “did” (in Ann’s words), anyway? Talking is doing?
The reason why I put it that way is not because I saw that as a standard meaning. It is intended to express what I think is exactly what Reid was doing. The clause begins with “if.” Seen that way, I’m saying: If what Reid did is racist, Reid is a racist.
If what she did is begging the the question, then she is a question-begging question beggar. Who begs questions.
Essentially, Harry Reid “did” have a private conversation where he said, “here’s why I think this guy might be able to get some votes.”
Actual quote with poor word choices aside, how is that “amassing political power” in any way, and how could any thinking person considering it something he was “doing.”
Is that photo from Ann’s flickr page?
If Ann’s writing is breathtakingly stupid, then Ann is breathtakingly stupid.
Hey, no ad hominem there. Harry Reid, thou art avenged!
Oh, and instead of that being Portrait of Ann “Toinette” Althouse, I think it should be Portrait of Ann “Toilette” Althouse.
I disapprove of what Sarah Palin does with her children and for that reason we aught to adopt it as the new definition of pedophile.
use other people’s feelings
What? I mean, WHAT THE FUCK? How does one do that? Annie Outhouse’s feeling have become a commodity? Anne’s feelings – don’t leave home with out them!
I suppose it entails shoving things down throats or something.
Boxed wine is great for rafting and camping.
Hahahahah! I see that the vortex is about to claim some new victims. Come and enter the vortex, libs!
Really, come enter the vortex. Please? Pretty please? You don’t realize how lonely it is here. I mean, I had to marry one of my commenters, for fuck’s sake. How desperate is that?
Please come into my vortex. I promise to share some of my wine with you…
Hey, no ad hominem there. Harry Reid, thou art avenged!
By grabthar’s hammer!
I wonder if she pierces the boxed wine bag with a straw and drinks directly from it when nobody’s around. Just like a Capri Sun!
At least she admits she isn’t interested in making life easy for her listeners [sic].
Ann really fits into that outfit. She looks just like a real inbred aristocrat from the 18th century.
Meaning, damn she’s homely.
If by “an actual relic of an ancient civilization” you mean a fuzzy, pixellated photo taken by Viking in 1976 and later shown to be the artifact of a fuzzy, pixellated photo, then I am so definitely a Super Huge Alien Sphinx built by L. Ron Hoover.
Also, Tucker Carlson’s new BFF Matt Labash doesn’t like traffic lights, ergo, they are rape.
If what Reid did is racist, Reid is a racist.
I like this formulation. Once I adjust it a little bit, I will be able to prove I wrote Don Quixote, which I did by the way.
Please come into my vortex.
What’s with the sexbot talk?
L. Ron Hoover.
Thanks for mentioning that – The Church of Appliantology must never be forgotten.
Interestingly, for a law prof, Mousey Box should know that an enormous amount of case law exists to prevent lawyers from re-interpreting the plain language of statute to mean its opposite. It’s called, quite surprisingly, the “plain language rule, ” words in statute must be given their plain, everyday meaning unless the statute specifically directs otherwise.
Methinks Labash needs to keep better tabs on who he lends his car to, the whiny little pisher.
What’s that you say? Rape isn’t sanctioned in this country?
LULZ. That’s pretty fucking funny.
Do people who say/write shit like this just not realize that, like, a shitton actual rape victims exist? Or do they not care?
she pierces the boxed wine bag with a straw and drinks directly from it …Just like a Capri Sun
Well that’s what I do for my lunch.
What?
The reason why I put it that way is not because I saw that as a standard meaning. It is intended to express what I think is exactly what Reid was doing. The clause begins with “if.” Seen that way, I’m saying: If what Reid did is racist, Reid is a racist.
What’s missing here is:
Indeed, that is central to my point.
AA has almost out-Jonahed the Master Po(o) himself.
Who says meritocracy is dead?
Althouse: “My post was intended to offer the suggestion that we ought to disapprove of what Reid did with race and for that reason we ought to adopt it as the definition of racist.”
Well, I disapprove of what Althouse does with logic, but that don’t make her a logician.
(and rather than launching a campaign to change the standard definition of this “powerful word”, she might think about using a word that already exists: racialist)
Do people who say/write shit like this just not realize that, like, a shitton actual rape victims exist? Or do they not care?
He’s just joking, man. Gad, you libs have no sense of humor.
she pierces the boxed wine bag with a straw and drinks directly from it …Just like a Capri Sun
Well that’s what I do for my lunch.
What?
I prefer to start early. Desk whiskey and tasteless office coffee make the crushing boredom go away…
La Althouse:
Now it all makes sense: She’s dumbing down the conversation against her will.
If what Reid did is racist, Reid is a racist.
On what would have been Elvis Presley’s birthday (Jan 8th), some local radio DJs noted that he would have been seventy-five this year. One of them then said “he’d still be alive, wouldn’t he?” Yes, radio person. If Elvis hadn’t died, he’d still be alive.
Not entirely relevant, but I found it funny even if nobody else does.
I find that Peet’s goes better with my desk whiskey.
words in statute must be given their plain, everyday
racist!
So I know I’m going to regret this. I know that what I’m contemplating is the pursuit of the kind of forbidden knowledge that leads people to spend the rest of their lives at Arkham Asylum, gibbering in a corner.
But I can’t help but wonder just WTF was her dissertation like, and did anyone on her committee make it out with their sanity intact?
We liberated Iraq because of Saddam’s red light camera rooms.
Yes, radio person. If Elvis hadn’t died, he’d still be alive.
Well, let us redefine “dead” and so revive him.
When any attempt at funniness is anchored on a hackneyed “at least take me out to dinner” end of paragraph punchline, you are not funny. Put “i hate speed cameras” into the Wingnut Argumentatron 5000 Comedy Edition and you get: speed cameras are like rape, take me out to dinner at least! Harharblartpoop/oops
I find that Peet’s goes better with my desk whiskey.
I’m cheap. And I find that the sulphuric unfiltered water and stale Maxwell House provide a nice complement to the sweet and burny flavor of Old Crow.
use other people’s feelings about race in a purely instrumental way to amass political power
ummm, *cough*entire “conservative” movment*cough*
pardon me – i must have a limbaugh stuck in my craw…
Many Australian box wines are actually of pretty high quality.
Or do they not care?
Nope. Not one bit.
Hey, I’ve got Labash’s spare keys, anyone else want to drive?
I’m tempted to ask how it could be that a law prof. could write such clap-trappy gibberish but then I recall John Yoo. Anyway, reading and rereading her post just bemuses the fuck out of me.
I want to challenge people to think about what is “racist,” not save the word for the meanings that have already been established.
I can’t read that without bursting out laughing. I’m speechless.
Let’s use it in ways that are useful.
Brilliant! One could use it to exploit people’s feelings to amass vast political power. For instance.
Well, g, there’s your problem right there: assuming Annie Outhouse is, in fact, a thinking person.
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what _______ is to ______ and ___________, it all becomes very clear.*
(*I’ve replaced my usual text with what I hope will start a S,N! Mad Libs/SAT mashup. Let’s see if anyone notices …)
Ah, so if by “child molester” we mean anyone who writes for a wingnut blog, then Ann is a child molester.
Gosh, this is fun.
what’s all this i hear about this “scary palin” becoming a common tater on a frog’s nose?
I want to challenge people to think about what is “racist,” not save the word for the meanings that have already been established.
I can’t read that without bursting out laughing. I’m speechless.
Uh, yeah, Ann–your “fellow” academics have been doing that for about 50 years now. Why don’t you leave that to them? Thanks.
I want to challenge people to think about what is “racist,” not save the word for the meanings that have already been established.
Let’s use it in ways that are useful.
Awesome. It’s like a parodic gutting of academic speak.
use other people’s feelings about race in a purely instrumental way to amass political power
Heh.
It’s like a parodic gutting of academic speak.
ZOMG!!1 An Outhouse is Alan Sokal in drag! Best troll EVAH!
Many Australian box wines are actually of pretty high quality.
Quote Monty Python: “This is not a wine for drinking. This is a wine for laying down and avoiding.”
I want to challenge people to think about what is “racist,” not save the word for the meanings that have already been established.
Not “save” a word for what it actually means? I, um, wow. YIPE.
in one-fourth of all automated ticket cases, the ticketed car owner wasn’t the one actually driving the vehicle at the time of the infraction
Where I live, that’s still a violation by the driver, and an affirmative defense by the vehicle owner. You’d have to be a dingleberry to assume these all led to unjust convictions of the owners rather than being sorted out as soon as they hit the court.
Just sayin’, my mom’s recent automated ticket citation (for failing to come to a complete stop before a right turn) came in the mail and included a secure website URL to remarkably clear .jpgs from the traffic light cameras of a zoom of the license plate and a windshield view of the driver behind the wheel, along with a lower res, 30-second .avi of the entire infraction from a top-down 3/4 angle.
She was so busted she just laughed and sent them a check for the fine.
right-wing law professor, Eugene Volokh, takes issue with Ann and tells her you can’t win arguments simply by making up new definitions of words.
Somewhere in here lies a comment about making up definitions of “right wing” given how the Overton window has shifted so far that Eugene Volokh doesn’t quite cut the standard of right wing anymore, but I am too tired to think of some compact and snarky way to comment on this right now.
MILHOUSE!!!!
Actually, what Harry Reid said is an all too common sentiment to hear. If what Harry Reid said makes him a racist than very, very many people in this country are racists. Which means all those conservatives who claim this is a post-racial world are 100% wrong. Way to score points for the team Althouse!
There’s glory for you.
I used to prefer RumpleMinze with the work coffee, for that just-brushed-your-teeth freshness.
Teh Great Gazoogle just taught me a different way:
Vodka Soaked Tampons
I’m surprised she continues to go by “Ann Althouse,” her slave name.
Vodka Soaked Tampons
That really wouldn’t work for men… or would it?
For certain meanings of works. In spite of my own sexual proclivities – or perhaps because of them – I just can not see that working out well, mechanically speaking.
Perhaps our resident buttseks proponent would chime in?
Vodka Soaked Tampons
Bloody Mary, anyone?
I’m going to go full-metal-pedant here for a second. I think the reason conservatives are so frustrated by discourse on race is that they are more likely to understand racism as a state of being (though it’s not that hard to find anti-racists who also essentialize racism) instead of as an act or accrual of acts built into structures. Essentializing racism leads one to aversive racism–the belief that one cannot be complicit in racist acts or institutions because one “is not racist.” Thus, racism isn’t a charge made in context (racist is as racist does)–it’s one’s nature suddenly erupting in speech rather than a statement that (in the case of Lott or George Allen) throws unwelcome light on a record of racist acts, or approval of such acts by others. When the light is thrown onto Reid’s record, you find consistently anti-racist action, so the comment reads as a inelegant speech, as ethos betrayed rather than disclosed.
As someone who studies communication, for me the more interesting question is why we take these sort of statements seriously as a cause for reflection (no matter what the conclusions we draw) but we tend to otherwise ignore actions that are consistently and materially racist.
If you beg the question, you’ve begged the question.
If Elvis was still alive, he would be dead by now.
Ooops, tig was inb4 me by a fucking mile.
As an addendum, I’m not saying that Ann Althouse is an idiot. I’m just saying that if conditioning your premises on the truth of a preferred conclusion makes you an idiot, then Ann Althouse is an idiot.
Perhaps our resident buttseks proponent would chime in?
I’m not shoving cotton up my ass for you or anybody else, dammit!
Oh, you weren’t a-dressing me?
Carry on, then.
Althouse in Wonderland
“Althouse in Her Fantasies.”
Many Australian box wines
What about the Louis St Ouaouaga Ouaouaga then???
Perhaps our resident buttseks proponent would chime in?
Here I thought he was sterilizing out of courtesy, but it turns out he was just a lush the whole time.
The fact is, if you put a vodka soaked tampon up your ass you are a fagot.
But if I put a vodka soaked tampon up your ass, Gary, who’s a fagot now?
Even Yogi Berra would go “WTF?” at that bit of whimsy.
Bloody Mary, anyone?
Awesome.
“Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what _______ is to ______ and ___________, it all becomes very clear”
I’ll play.
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what Tiger Woods is to fidelity and trust, it all becomes very clear.
Also:
“Bloody Mary, anyone?”
*spit!*
We have a winner!
Vodka Soaked Tampons
Interest, website, newsletter…
I don’t think faggots would do it, for several reasons.
1. It would be pretentious (not to mention stupid) to use good vodka and I, for one, wouldn’t be caught dead buying that nasty cheap shit.
2. A soaked tampon would, as I mentioned above, be difficult to insert. And if you’re going to go to that much trouble, well Mary, there are far more enjoyable things for which to make the effort.
3. No self respecting faggot would allow a string dangling from his butt. Note: tails for furries, toy’s power cords and handles are not strings – those things are completely different thank you very much.
A prototype buttplug/flask is in the works. I should probably include remote control, yes? Yes, Bluetooth, I think.
Pardon me, but at what point in the process is the tampon soaked in vodka?
A soaked tampon would, as I mentioned above, be difficult to insert.
There have been great advances in cardboard tube insertion technology since your salad days, Mr. PeeJ..
D-KW’s mom wrote an op-ed piece.
There have been great advances in cardboard tube insertion technology since your salad days, Mr. PeeJ..
Don’t tell me that! Man, you’re just destroying my business plan.
I don’t think faggots would do it, for several reasons.
1. It would be pretentious (not to mention stupid)
Sorry, that’s where you lost me.
I want to challenge people to think about what is “POOP,” not save the word for the meanings that have already been established.
I use it in an instrumental way, if I forget the words. Or I use the 12-minute drum solo. Either way I’m a dumbass.
Love, Ann
PS if you voted against Barack Obama because he’s black, then you are a racist, unless you were just trying to amass political power. In that case, you’re a racist.
Just cut the string off, and when you’ve absorbed enough vodka you can poop-shoot it out at someone.
“if” I had a hammer…….
use other people’s feelings about race in a purely instrumental way to amass political power
Umm … what is Philadelphia, Mississippi?
I will be able to prove I wrote Don Quixote, which I did by the way.
I always suspected that J– was really Pierre Menard.
Boxed wine is great for rafting and camping.
Not all bottle-stores sell big enough boxes, mind you.
what other crime-fighting technology do we consider reliable that nabs the wrong person 25 percent of the time?
ID line-ups.
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what Tiger Woods is to fidelity and trust, it all becomes very clear.
Are you married to Tiger Woods?
If not, WTF business is it of yours?
“Are you married to Tiger Woods?”
No, but I fucked him.
I’m here all the week. Try the veal!
It occurs to me that mentions of shitbox tongue-jacking are (disturbingly) absent from recent threads. I offer this comment to help rectify the situation.
Also, teh fucking profanity level is dangerously low.
i must have a limbaugh stuck in my craw…
My pet craw just died.
Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
The fact is, [I am] shut up.
@PeeJ: This might give you a shot in the arm.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dxvUGURMfBY
Fucking also.
PeeJ, there has also been a dearth of Shit Moat sightings.
It’s like I don’t even KNOW this site anymore.
If Ann thinks onion rings look like wahinas, Ann’s wahina looks like an onion ring.
Thanks Kid, it did indeed. It’s loke a call to the Emergency Profanity Team:
“like” too. And such as.
Cunt: let’s use it in ways that are useful.
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what Lady GaGa is to taste and decorum, it all becomes very clear.
Better?
One does not need to be married to Tiger Woods to use him as a lit’rary device.
But it helps.
As for rape guy – I think it’s funny he used “sanctioned”, a word that can mean either “allowed” or “punished”, adding ambiguity to what he thought was a definite statement.
And yeah, in this country we don’t countenance rape – we just define it such that ten men having sex with an unconcious sixteen-yr-old ON VIDEOTAPE is not considered rape, necessarily.
So yeah, that’s just like automatic redlight tickets.
Cunt: let’s use it in ways that are useful.
Sorry, I can’t imagine any way cunt could be useful. But that’s just me. PENIS, on the other hand….
Cunt: let’s use it in ways that are useful.
OMG, you’re a genius! I’ll never lose my car keys again!
“I’ll never lose my car keys again!”
Yeah, but the ten minutes you’ll spend “finding” them whenever you want to drive will make you late to everything.
OTOH, have you ever walked around your house looking for your sunglasses when they were right there on top of your head all the time?
If my aunt had balls, she’d be my uncle.
Completely OT, I had never noticed until just now while reading the Glennster at Salon the his blogroll, titled “blogs I read” includes Sadly,No!.
Note that he never bothers to give us his thoughts on An Outhouse, vodka soaked tampons, buttseks or cunt.
Thanks to the Library of Babel, we are all Pierre Menard and Cervantes and Ann Althouse now. And Sancho Panza for that matter.
Or HITLER for that matter.
Cunt: let’s use it in ways that are useful.
Now that’s what I call pushing scholarship in a new direction!
If what Outhouse wrote is idiotic, then Outhouse is idiotic.
If you put your lips on a vodka-soaked double reed, you’re a fagottist.
Hm, after reading her actual post, I’m kind of thinking that saying “that’s great, but will it play in Peoria?” makes you a Midwesterner (if by Midwesterner you mean not someone who is from or lives in the Midwest, but someone who is particularly concerned about the preferences of canonically dull, provincial people).
If you put your lips on a vodka-soaked double reed, you’re a fagottist.
O BOES!
I can’t believe no one else caught this little gem, linked in the vodka-tampon article above:
POOP!
Why do I get the feeling that the little conservatard dipshit would be perfectly OK with racial profiling, a crime-fighting technology that nabs the wrong person about, what, 90% of the time?
tampons…wine boxes…cunts… There’s something there about a box in a box but it’s eluding me….
Let’s do the fork in the garbage disposal…
Vodka Soaked Tampons
With just a splash of dry vermouth, and an olive.
Or, you know, AKVAVIT.
Whale Chowder said,
January 13, 2010 at 2:29
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what Lady GaGa is to taste and decorum, it all becomes very clear.
Better?
—
I’d prefer if you said Frank Marino and Mahogany Rush, but then I have imaginary sex with Okinawan Ph.Ds.
I want to challenge people to think about what is “stupid,” not save the word for the meanings that have already been established.
the fork in the garbage disposal
Soon to be the official dance of WeHo, no doubt. You bitchez is so crrraaaazeee!
Butt Monkey Wins The Internet!!
#
Butt Monkey said,
January 12, 2010 at 23:59
Vodka Soaked Tampons
That really wouldn’t work for men… or would it?
ESTELLE: Frank, if Aunt Baby were alive today, how old would she be?
FRANK: She’d never make it.
George thinks a little and looks hopeful.
In other news, it’s mean and just not nice of Coakley to bring up Scott Brown’s 2005 amendment to block rape victims from obtaining emergency contraception because Brown’s daughters say he’s a nice guy who would never deny rape victims contraception.
No doubt he would have been a member of the “It’s Al Franken’s fault we voted in favour of rape” 30 member Republican senate caucus, had he been there.
If yo mama so fat, she too big to fail.
Note that he never bothers to give us his thoughts on An Outhouse, vodka soaked tampons, buttseks or cunt.
What makes you so sure?
@pierre, those things are all well and good. But only one at a time. Ask Big Bald Bastard about bourbon and Peach Melba enemas, if you want to know what taking it to the wall is all about.
Ooh, fun with metaphors!
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what Dan Brown is to literature and high art, it all becomes very clear.
Also, anyone who criticises another woman for wearing her breasts in public really shouldn’t get to talk about social mores, no? (Ann Althouse is a social moray. Cue Frank Sinatra puns in 5, 4, 3…)
I don’t get it. The Lady Is A Tramp?
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what Rachel Ray is to cooking and tv hosts, it all becomes very clear.
Once you accept the fact that Althouse is to logic and the law what Glenn Beckis to sanity and actual clowns, it all becomes very clear.
I don’t see the humor in this.
Hey, the Ho is in Chi-town and I have nothing better to do. Indulge me.
I was talking to Glenn Beck at the White Swallow the other day — we were having a couple of Brewskis (George and Mitchell Brewski, as I remember) and Glenn said, “you know what the hardest part of being a child molester is?” And I said, “no, Glenn, tell me — what is the hardest part of being a child molester?” And he said, “getting the blood out of your clown suit.”
It was getting late, so we left.
I don’t understand what this is all about.
I watched Doctor Who for years. I’m sure it also had no Negro dalek.
Is it racist to point that out?
Oh my god.
Girl Daleks.
Eeeew. Girl daleks have cooties.
George and Mitchell Brewski
Ah yes, the pop-top brothers.
Once you accept the fact that Althouse is to logic and the law what Glenn Greenwald is to women and having sex with them, it all becomes very clear.
First reaction: Who are you and what have you done with the real F. M.? Sorry, but A) that just doesn’t work and B) doesn’t seem up to par with what we’ve come to expect from F.M.
On further contemplation: Mmmmmmm, I dunno. I am too critical possibly due to my, you know, being, as they say, in GG’s camp?
It is something to ponder. I shall have another martini and do so.
Althouse twists logic like…., well, frankly, it is hard to come up with anything that twists as much as Althouse twists logic.
Yet her wildly mislead “fans” put it this way, essentially “Althouse is this wonderful way of putting things so that people can really see what is going on.”
Here is an example of just that, and how her mislead fans see it.
Picking on An Outhouse is like ______________.
Using speds in office chat.
Shooting fish in a barrel.
Wanking.
Which is to say, I’m spifflicated and we kan haz nu tred nau plz?
O.K., PeeJ, shameful admissions time. Forgot the dude was gay. I had the sexbot joke from yesterday in mind when I wrote that.
Also, I’m Troofie. Wait no I’m not. Shameful admissions time is over.
Wait a minute, fuck everything. I was thinking of Glenn Reynolds. Jesus Christ.
At first I was happy that I even had a reputation here to defend, because this site is years old and I’ve been here for like a month. Not that it matters now goddamnit.
Also, teh fucking profanity level is dangerously low.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2010/jan/11/tom-hicks-jr-quits-liverpool-email,
‘blow me, fuckface’
M.Bouffant…. you picasa pictures show either a very distressed mind ro a very high intake of strong liquor.
HaH! Glenn Beck doesn’t have a clown suit!!! Otherwise accurate, though.
HaH! Glenn Beck doesn’t
haveneed a clown suit!!! Otherwise accurate, though.Tried to tighten that up a bit.
Oh, Tautology, thy name is Althouse.
Wait a minute, fuck everything. I was thinking of Glenn Reynolds. Jesus Christ.
Sorry, Monk, but actor still retains the self-pwnage trophy from a while back.
Once you accept the fact that Althouse is to logic and the law what the Beast from 20,000 Fathoms is to keeping the house tidy and being able to play the tuba, it all becomes very clear.
If Volokh said an idiotic thing, Volokh is an idiot.
Can I be a law professor?
Eeeew. Girl daleks have cooties.
I think that’s spelled with an ‘-er’. Besides, just cuz YOU don’t like ’em doesn’t make ’em ewwie. Hmph.
like mr. labash here, i too hate speeding cameras. first, i dislike cameras monitoring public behavior. mostly though, because i tend to speed. and yes, they are just a means of collecting revenue, but so are all speeding tickets. and parking tickets as well (seriously, is there harm in parking somewhere for 3 hours instead of 2? no, no there isn’t).
unlike mr. labsah though, i’m not a fucking lunatic who likens it to the horrific and violent act of rape. it’s an inconvience, mostly because you can sometimes talk yourself out of a ticket. a cop is not likely to ticket you for driving 50 in a 35 zone if it’s a 3 lane road and 1 AM with no traffic. if you’re good enough, you might only get a verbal warning. the camera, however, doesn’t care.
so, here’s my suggestion for his list of complaints: first, one must trot out the old standard: if you aren’t doing anything wrong, you needed worry about those cameras…. okay, that’s out of the way. now, don’t want your friends getting tickets in your car? don’t lend them the fucking car. don’t want to get caught by cameras? remember where they are and don’t speed there. don’t run red lights. or, do what i used to and just take the damn subway instead. there, no more tickets.
I’m more curious than ever as to whether An Outhouse uses this sort of argument in the classroom, or if she’s actually sane and well-reasoned when she’s teaching and uses her blog to let the crazy out. Unfortunately, she’s probably got the alcoholic’s paranoia and wouldn’t let someone sit in on her classes to check out her style; doubtless there have already been plenty of UW students who have tried.
And WRT vodka tampons, the original link is one of those dumb-ass “guess what I heard the kids are doing these days!” urban legend bullshit things in the same genre as rainbow parties. (Snopes has it listed as “undetermined”; I’m of the opinion that if there’s no write-up in a medical journal, it didn’t happen.) I am constantly flabbergasted at technical grown-ups who have either forgotten, or were completely out of it in high school and never realized, that most teenagers are consummate bullshitters; they would be the sort of substitute teachers who would be perennially puzzled as to why Mike Hunt never showed up for class. Alcohol enemas, on the other hand, are quite real and the seed for at least one Darwin Award.
He doesn’t like automatic redlight ticketing because it cannot be bribed or intimidated by wealth or status 100% of the time, meaning that if he decides he’s entitled to break the law he’s going to both get caught and pay for it, and that just sticks the fuck in his craw.
What you say is true, Goddamn Batman, but if we didn’t take liberties we wouldn’t have such sparkling conversations. Speaking of sparkling, champagne enemas have been much discussed for years.
Now this is just funny:
zombie rotten mcdonald said, [Felonius Monk: “Wait a minute, fuck everything. I was thinking of Glenn Reynolds. Jesus Christ.”] Sorry, Monk, but actor still retains the self-pwnage trophy from a while back.
Monk, don’t you just hate when this happens and you don’t even get the darn trophy? What’s worse is when you’ve followed actor’s commenting career, but you missed the self-pwnage trophy-gettin’ event.
Glenn Greenwald / Glenn Reynolds
They have the same first name. They’re both lawyers. They are both public figures, known primarily through their writings. Um…. each surname has two syllables. And… yup, that’s about it.
Once you accept the fact that Althouse is to logic and the law what Glenn Reynolds is to logic and the law it all becomes very clear.
If my aunt had balls, she’d be my uncle.
That’s giving her too much credit. If your aunt had balls, you could make a reasonable case for calling her your uncle, though it would likely piss her off.
What Althose said is more akin to, “If by ‘uncle’, we mean my mom’s sister, then my aunt’s my uncle”.
Posts like these are why I live for this blog.
I.
Love.
You.
Once you accept the fact Althouse is to logic and the law what traffic lights are to rape and comedy, it all becomes very clear.
Can someone link to actor’s self pwnage?
Oh, and Althouse is to logic and the law what the Patriots are to winning when not cheating and getting a victory in the ’09 playoffs.
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Too soon?
I am so sorry that my employers IT department made it impossible for me to join in on the discussion about vodka tampons.
If Althouse were a tampon, she would be a vodka tampon.
Can someone link to actor’s self pwnage?
That’s a rather personal question.
If Althouse were to douche with wine, she would have a Box of Wine.
If Althouse had balls, she would be Ann Coulter.
If Ann Coulter had breasts, she would be Jonah Goldberg.
O the purported T: Texas preparing for big fun with the school board’s upcoming vote on a new social studies curriculum.
Should be plenty of quotable quotes coming from that.
Srsly, that pic of An Outhouse at the top now makes me think she’s wearing a giant (vodka soaked?) tampon on her head.
As opposed to just being a box of whine?
Let’s see, Mark. There’s this one. But, IIRC, the trophy award was more recent.
There was something last week on teh GOS about that.
Big problem with this is, as textbook publishers don’t want to be arsed printing a different set for each State, and Texas is a huge market, what Texas says winds up going for everybody. Fucktards.
What unmitgated twaddle! (if by “twaddle” you mean “something insignificant or worthless” – i.e. a typical Althouse rumination)
Following last week’s highlight reel, can I suggest the following…
@annalthouse if u dfine law prof as crzy ashol w/ crabs, cn splain y u get none. Sry, jus usin yr logic.
Ps. Thanks Tintin for the Slack love.
OT – Would you give this guy a quarter to buy a clue?
http://i48.tinypic.com/rl0121.jpg
Learn To Speak Teabag
OT – Would you give this guy a quarter to buy a clue?
Looks like the guy behind him was a recent recipient of Captain Teabag’s talents.
Speaking of OT, and Tintin please get yer ass (sans, one hopes, a vodka soaked tampon) out of bed and give us a new thread!
It will come as no surprise to anyone here that the “Protect Marriage” movement has it completely wrong. Upside down, backwards, whatever.
Nate does the numbers:
*sigh*
As long as we’re still here, how ’bout some sports news:
I don’t really give a shit about the whole McGwire/steroids issue, but I just love it when someone named Dick Pound gets quoted.
Also, PENIS.
Peej – don’t worry, Ted Olson in on the case:
http://www.edgeboston.com/index.php?ch=news&sc=&sc2=news&sc3=&id=101048
However, former WADA president Dick Pound criticized Selig and said he’s skeptical of claims that baseball is becoming cleaner.
Ballplayers cheat. League looks the other way. Fans cheer. League makes money. Sanctimonious politicians get involved. League promises it will clean things up. Ballplayers find better ways to cheat. Life goes on.
In my earlier comment the excerpt is not from 538.com but from an AirAmerica article about the 538.com study. I regret the error.
I read that Ted Olson piece the other day. I am now highly conflicted becuase Ted Olson is such a total dickweed but that article makes me think there may be hope for conservatives (and America) after all.
With a name like Dick Pound it must’ve been hilarious when attendance was taken via Lastname, Firstname.
I regret the error.
Non, je ne regrette rien.
I am now highly conflicted because Ted Olson is such a total dickweed but that article makes me think there may be hope for conservatives (and America) after all.
Two points that temper my enthusiasm:
1) This just reinforces what we already knew – that most rich, educated elites are not particularly homophobic, but see taking that position as an easy way to hang onto their loot. If the pillory and the noose would divert the peasants from class warfare, they’d be happy to revive them. I suppose that we should be encouraged that the rats are leaving the ship, but I’ll bet this is strictly a finger-to-the-wind, which way is the money and prestige situation.
2) The only reason that any of these bastards give a shit now is that many openly gay people have worked or inherited their way into the upper crust. As soon as those few are given the same legal rights and respectability as their wealthy peers, they will start sending their checks to the Republican Party (or so Olsen an his ilk are betting).
To misquote Gandhi: “”First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then they co-opt your leaders, then your leaders declare victory, then things continue much as they were before.”
cate,
let me fix
I think the reason conservatives are so frustrated by discourse on race is that they are more likely to understand racism as a state of being
for you …
I think the reason conservatives are so frustrated by discourse is that they are more likely to understand pretty much anything as a state of being
there … fixed … assuming the conservatives in question understand anything in the first place.
Further off topic than usual…
I have some biz to conduct in Fall River. It turns out that there are no hotels in central Fall River and I’ll be arriving by train (to Providence) and bus (to F.R.) so I don’t want to be a twenty-minute drive away. There is, however, one place to stay downtown: the Lizzie Borden Museum is also a bed and breakfast.
I’m booked for two nights in her parents’ bedroom. I’m debating whether to get Mrs. __B a pair of the hatchet earrings for sale in the gift shop.
Two points that temper my enthusiasm:
There’s also a tiny suspicion* that lurks way in the back of my little haid that Ted is acting as … agent provocateur? no, damn rattletrap brain.. anyway it’s actually a huge deception wherein they get the case to the SCOTUS prematurely, all in order to lose.
* I have already expressed my corollary to François de La Rochefoucauld’s “Those who are incapable of committing great crimes do not readily suspect them in others.” No one need point out what my suspicions say about me.
N__B, the hatchet earrings are a must!
I’m debating whether to get Mrs. __B a pair of the hatchet earrings for sale in the gift shop.
DOOOO IIIIIT. That’s pretty much the best souvenir EVER.
Two to nothing is a better majority than the 2000 election. Hatchet earrings it is.
You know who else is with Coco?
I’d be pissed if my other half went there and didn’t bring me back something tacky – something exactly like the earrings.
And, since we’re left to our own devices here, take a look at the “customers who bought this item also bought:”
(via Buzzfeed)
Unadorned linky: http://www.amazon.com/dp/0805470859/?tag=buzz0f-20
I am now officially jealous of Mrs. N__B!
I am now officially jealous of Mrs. N__B!
Well, she is married to a living god, but don’t be jealous on account of the earrings. They can be yours: http://www.lizzie-borden.com/GiftShop.aspx
NYT
Pat Robertson said that Haiti is cursed by a “pact with the devil.”
thank you, pat, that is very helpful
And, since we’re left to our own devices here, take a look at the “customers who bought this item also bought:”
Oh, my. Makes one wonder what the “unknown binding” in those communion wafers actually is.
Makes one wonder what the “unknown binding” in those communion wafers actually is.
Cartilage?
Not out of the realm of possibility. Still, Olson is putting his conservative cred on the line with the majority of the base, most of whom see things in black and white and who would not be convinced that the damned liberal Supremes would give them their favored outcome.
The other day I was saying someone needed to step up and shoot Pat Buchanan. I see I was quite wrong. Robertson would be a far more productive target if your goal is to save dysfunctional evangelicalism from itself.
I wish I could keep myself from hating that man.
Good thing my religion doesn’t proscribe such sentiments- that way I’m at least not a hypocrite.
Shorter me: Fuck Pat Robertson in every orifice with a rusty Garden Weasel. Twice.
Cartilage?
I’m not sure if that’s more or less disgusting than what I had in mind…
Makes one wonder what the “unknown binding” in those communion wafers actually is.
Wankage.
For churches who prefer the wafer for use in the Communion service.
As opposed to, say, actual bits of flesh from J.C.’s body?
T&U got there first!
I’m not sure if that’s more or less disgusting than what I had in mind…
At the moment, I’m fixated on “Guests are treated to a breakfast similar to the one the Bordens ate on the morning of the murders, which includes bananas, jonny-cakes, sugar cookies and coffee in the addition to a delicious meal of breakfast staples.” I may pass on the home-made sausage.
Shorter me: Fuck Pat Robertson in every orifice with a rusty Garden Weasel. Twice.
Really, it’s no different from him saying that we brought 9/11 on ourselves because of our wicked ways, or that New Orleans brought on Katrina because of teh ghey. Pretty much his standard response to any disaster, natural or otherwise, is “God did it because you were bad.”
I may pass on the home-made sausage.
Oh, but you’re willing to eat cakes made of jonny?
Snotcho sauce!
Oh, but you’re willing to eat cakes made of jonny?
Yes, yes I am.
T&U got there first!
Yes, but I was so very demure about it. But kudos to you for not beating around the bush.
Really, it’s no different from him saying that we brought 9/11 on ourselves because of our wicked ways, or that New Orleans brought on Katrina because of teh ghey. Pretty much his standard response to any disaster, natural or otherwise, is “God did it because you were bad.”
When he eventually gets shot in the face, I’ll say “Pat Robertson died because he made a deal with Satan for riches and power.”
I’ll probably be right, too.
“Guests are treated to a breakfast similar to the one the Bordens ate on the morning of the murders, which includes bananas, jonny-cakes, sugar cookies and coffee in the addition to a delicious meal of breakfast staples.”
Good god, Lizzie Borden’s parents must have been fat.
Good god, Lizzie Borden’s parents must have been fat.
You’ll sink to the lowest depths to justify murder, won’t you?
PeeJ, perhaps you are not aware that Astroglide does wonders as a candle stick polisher. Just saying.
As opposed to, say, actual bits of flesh from J.C.’s body?
This was actually a significant point of controversy at my fundie evangelical childhood church. We believed that round wafers were devil cookies, while homemade crackers were just what Jesus would have insisted on at the dinner table.
We also drank grape juice, not wine, because that is what the Bible must have meant where it says wine. In fact, did you know that this is the only inaccuracy in the King James Version? Our Lord’s chosen vessel must have been distracted while that bit was being poured like a golden puddle into his heart
Raised as a methodist. Nothing like a sip of Welchade and a Saltine to inspire communion with the divine.
Don’t you like Robertson’s grasp of history? Napoleon the Third?
You’ll sink to the lowest depths to justify murder, won’t you?
Hey, what can I say? I hate fatties.
“distracted” was supposed to link to an article on the male lovers of King James, but enough about me.
Pretty much his standard response to any disaster, natural or otherwise, is “God did it because you were bad.”
Yeah, that’s his vile, typical self. But I take some small comfort knowing that he’s kicking himself all over the place for not having prayed imprecatorily for something to happen to Haiti. So he could claim “credit” for it.
“Lord, we ask for additional vacancies on the court.”
“I would warn Orlando that you’re right in the way of some serious hurricanes, and I don’t think I’d be waving those flags in God’s face if I were you”
“”I’d like to say to the good citizens of Dover: If there is a disaster in your area, don’t turn to God, you just rejected him from your city. And don’t wonder why he hasn’t helped you when problems begin, if they begin. I’m not saying they will, but if they do, just remember, you just voted God out of your city.”
“Maybe we need a very small nuke thrown off on Foggy Bottom to shake things up”
“Well, I totally concur.” –Pat Robertson to Jerry Falwell following the Sept. 11 attacks, after Falwell said, “I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People For the American Way — all of them who have tried to secularize America — I point the finger in their face and say: “You helped this happen.”
As a child, I don’t think I realized that when Jesus talked about wine in the bible, he meant, like, real, actual WINE. Then again, I grew up in a Protestant family in rural Kansas and the only wine I ever saw anyone drink was the boxed pink shit at my uncle’s on Thanksgiving.
candle stick polisher
Oh come on, at least put a veil over it!
I’ve always thought that laughter was the least reliable way to define something as funny or not, and this post only proves my point.
two, four, six, eight,
time to transubstantiate
But Pat doesn’t do just disasters. Let’s not forget Pat on Ariel Sharon’s stroke:
“”God has enmity against those who, quote ‘divide my land,'” Robertson told his television audience. “And I would say, woe unto any prime minister of Israel who takes a similar course…”
Will Pat Robertson please just hurry up and DIE already?
Another fave
a delicious meal of breakfast staples
i have too much metal in my diet already
Can someone go drop a bag of anvils on this motherfucker?: “Amidst the Suffering, Crisis in Haiti Offers Opportunities to the U.S.”
I am too burning with rage (at least, I think that’s rage) to post any coherent response.
Let’s not forget Pat on Ariel Sharon’s stroke:”God has enmity against those who, quote ‘divide my land,” Robertson told his television audience.
Yeah, because the “Butcher of Sabra and Chatila” was such a pussy peacenik.
Christians are funny.
“As described in the Bible, manna resembled Coriander in size and shape: it was like a grain, like a small white round ball-like seed which was collected, ground up, and baked to make cakes, like wheat is ground to make bread. So, no, the Catholic wafer host does not imitate manna in either size or shape.” (From ped’s DEVIL COOKIE link)
Fundy “Logic”:
If bad things happen to people I hate, it’s God’s punishment;
If good things happen to people I hate, it’s because they have made a deal with teh Devil;
If bad things happen to people I like, it because (a) they didn’t pray hard enough, (b) the Devil was striking out at his enemies, or (c) God was calling them home;
If good things happen to people I like, then God was rewarding them.
Q to the E to the D
Hatchet earring nothing, there’s a Lizzie Borden BOBBLE-HEAD!
T & U: at least he didn’t advocate bombing them into loving us.
I think they’re coming around!
Hatchet earring nothing, there’s a Lizzie Borden BOBBLE-HEAD!
That’s for me. Mrs. __B is not a bobblehead kind of girl.
“Amidst the Suffering, Crisis in Haiti Offers Opportunities to the U.S.”
While on the ground in Haiti, the U.S. military can also interrupt the nightly flights of cocaine to Haiti and the Dominican Republic from the Venezuelan coast and counter the ongoing efforts of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez to destabilize the island of Hispaniola. This U.S. military presence, which should also include a large contingent of U.S. Coast Guard assets, can also prevent any large-scale movement by Haitians to take to the sea in rickety watercraft to try to enter the U.S. illegally.
sadly, my application to become gaulieter of the protectorate of haiti was turned down
Can someone go drop a bag of anvils on this motherfucker?
Sadly, what he’s espousing is in line with America’s historical attitude/policy toward Haiti.
From teh Wikipedia:
From 1957 to 1986, the Duvalier family reigned as dictators, turning the country into a hermit kingdom with a personality cult and excessive corruption. They created the private army and terrorist death squads known as Tonton Macoutes. Many Haitians fled to exile in the United States and Canada, especially French-speaking Quebec. In the 1970s the United States funded major efforts to establish assembly plants for U.S. manufacturers. In the mid 1980s the US continued military and economic aid to the regime.
Ah, yes, how could we forget the Reagan administration and its support of Freedom?
T & U: at least he didn’t advocate bombing them into loving us.
Only because they’ve figured out that it looks bad, and really, any large-scale disaster will do for a Great Conservative Experiment.
See also: Hurricane Katrina
Yes.
[No, that passage isn’t about manna but how could I not bring it up?]
FYWP
Just now was not the first time that a comment consisting only of four letters – FYWP – was eated by wordpress. It makes one wonder.
Sadly, what he’s espousing is in line with America’s historical attitude/policy toward Haiti.
This is true, but seeing someone spout this kind of shit so un-self consciously right after such a tragedy is fucking mind-melting.
My favorite part is this: “This U.S. military presence, which should also include a large contingent of U.S. Coast Guard assets,” (because we don’t have any other military left) “can also prevent any large-scale movement by Haitians to take to the sea in dangerous and rickety watercraft to try to enter the U.S. illegally.” ZOMFG ILLEGALS! On RAFTS!
And thou shalt eat it as
don’t forget that we continue to provoke god’s wrath by wearing clothes made out of mixed fabrics and not building altars out of undressed stones
Nothing better to do so
“candle stick polisher”
Oh come on, at least put a veil over it!
Whatever turns you on PeeJ.
I throw you a hanging curveball and this is the thanks I get? Were you refering to the veil of the Virgin Mary you blasphemer! Dick Pound, also. (You know, if my mommy named me that, I would go by Rich Pound. Just saying.)
Pat Robertson did not say that those Haitians spoke with a French negro dialect so I give him credit for that. Nothing to see, move along.
Gocart’s Law: The longer a Sadly No! thread goes, the inevitability of a Penis reference approches %100.
I’m so late to this game, but let me try one:
If “Althouse” meant “someone who can only derive sexual satisfaction from live animal-on-child porn,” then Ann Althouse would have a really embarrassing name.
I GOT MY SWIM TRUNKS
AND MY FLIPPY FLOPPIES
IM FLIPPIN BURGERS YOU AT KINKOS STR8 FLIPPIN COPIES
IM RIDIN ON A DOLPHIN
DOIN FLIPS AND SHIT
Y’ALL MOTHERFUCKERS CANT TOUCH ME IM ON A BOAT!
E$
a comment consisting only of four letters – FYWP – was eated by wordpress
wordpress is a god-fearing program and thought you were trying to blaspheme by posting the name of god in tetragrammaton
Ezra Klein is on a motherfuckin boat said,
Yeah, but there’s no way you fucked a mermaid, dude.
Gocart’s Law: The longer a Sadly No! thread goes, the inevitability of a Penis reference approches %100.
also, Godcartwin’s Law of Convergence suggests the ever-increasing likelihood of a cameo appearance by Hitler’s penis.
only wine I ever saw anyone drink was the boxed pink shit at my uncle’s on Thanksgiving.
Stop making fun of Ann Althouse. The poor dear has suffered enough.
That Heritage Foundation guy who thinks we should use the earthquake in Haiti as an opportunity to invade it is a real asshole, but as usual, for the real major league assholery you have to go to the pros:
http://mediamatters.org/mmtv/201001130017
Glad to see how Rush’s brush with mortality during his heart attack in Hawaii gave him more compassion for his fellow man.
Hatchet earring nothing, there’s a Lizzie Borden BOBBLE-HEAD!
If she’s bobbling an axe, SOLD!!
Then, of course, there’s FOX:
http://mediamatters.org/blog/201001130025
They’re all black people, ya see – there’s a deep-seated connection.
Hatchet earring nothing, there’s a Lizzie Borden BOBBLE-HEAD!
If she’s bobbling an axe, SOLD!!
If they have bobbleheads of Lizzie’s parents with detachable heads, I’m in.
If she’s bobbling an axe, SOLD!!
“Slash fic” is somehow not the appropriate idea…maybe “chop fic”?
Then, of course, there’s FOX:
yeah because a guy who torches his own yarbles in a laughable attempt is JUST AS CRITICAL as a natural disaster that kills 100,000 people. It’s OBVIOUS which of these requires more pants-wetting.
Hatchet earring nothing, there’s a Lizzie Borden BOBBLE-HEAD!
and people say American culture is on the decline.
Speaking of the wonders of American culture, Substance has discovered this:
http://houseofsubstance.blogspot.com/2010/01/oreo-barbie.html
If they have bobbleheads of Lizzie’s parents with detachable heads, I’m in.
I was wrong. THIS is the best souvenir EVER.
M. Bouffant … your Picasa pictures show either a very distressed mind or a very high intake of strong liquor.
Both, and …?
That’s just the display album, used mostly to link stuff I think others (often here) should see. If you could see the private albums … You’d be asleep.
Hey, I finally have a use for this box of remaindered copies of Liberal Fascism.
In other news, “Fuck you Lane Kiffin.” Also, PENIS.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/13/tennessee-football-riots_n_421255.html
It turns out that fucker was right. Haiti did make a deal with the devil:
It took until 1947 before the original principal plus vig was paid off.
Rush is right if by “Rush” you mean “asshole” and by “right” you mean “an asshole”.
Godcartwin’s Law of Convergence suggests the ever-increasing likelihood of a cameo appearance by Hitler’s penis.
Happy now?
Rush … his fellow man
assumes facts not in evidence
I will be very disappointed if Mr. N_B does not bring back “Lizzie”-engraved hatchet key-chains for all of us w/o pierced whatevers!
Saw this headline on Huffington Post: “Man on trial for fatal Russian Roulette game in Maine sex dungeon.”
That’s it. I’m done with the internet.
M. Bouffant, Hitler had a rooster! My thoughts of him have completely changed. Good for him.
It turns out that fucker was right. Haiti did make a deal with the devil:
You think that’s bad…
“Man on trial for fatal Russian Roulette game in Maine sex dungeon.”
I know what you mean. It’s not like anyone was holding a gun to his head.
There’s glory for you.
Bravo, animus, bravo!
http://www.whitehouse.gov/blog/2010/01/13/help-haiti
You can also help immediately by donating to the Red Cross to assist the relief effort. Contribute online to the Red Cross, or donate $10 to be charged to your cell phone bill by texting “HAITI” to “90999.” Find more ways to help through the Center for International Disaster Information.
Once you accept the fact that Althouse is to logic and the law what the Beast from 20,000 Fathoms is to keeping the house tidy and being able to play the tuba, it all becomes very clear.
heh.
If they have bobbleheads of Lizzie’s parents with detachable heads, I’m in.
The lesson Lizzie teaches is that all parents have detachable heads.
Brad posted about Haiti in May and gave a link to a group that could use some love:
http://www.healingartmissions.org/Support.php
The lesson Lizzie teaches is that all parents have detachable heads.
Hey, I have a newsletter, if you’re interested…
Hey, I have a newsletter, if you’re interested…
Vegetarian, so can I substitute Gardenbrains®(“the original veggie brains”) in the recipes?
What I don’t get about the whole God-has-punished them bit is, there’s sin everywhere. What’s taking God so long? I mean, Columbia’s basically a big horny bacchanal every weekend, but I don’t see us falling into the pits of hell, unless “losing to Baylor in football” qualifies as the pits of hell.
Wasn’t just the sin, it was the “TRUE STORY: THEY MADE A PACT W/ THE DEVIL” what done them in. Because casting off the shackles of slavery is a Satanic idea.
You lost to Babtiss? Ha ha.
Holy Crap. It is a “true story”.
“It’s hard not to become an atheist when certain people aren’t incinerated by bolts of lightning.”
–Calvin & Hobbes
“the original veggie brains”) i
Cauliflower? eww.
different strokes, I guess. But there aren’t a lot of vegan zombies, is all Imma sane.
OK, one more and then I’ll quit.
I’m more weary than even this thread.
Rush started it and you know we’ll be hearing more of it in the days to come, blaming the victim.
Surprisingly, Haiti didn’t just magically become poor. Seems it had a little help.
The Good Dr. Chomsky wrote a chapter about it in 1993:
You can read the rest of the piece here.
Well, Felonious Monk, God is a prick, at least accordng to Robertson’s theology What Pat meant to say is “NIGGER, NIGGER, DIE NIGGERS!” He was being obtuse because he has to.
Political Correctness and all that !!eleventy! (Cops shooting black kids excepted)
Off-topic ( & even off-OFF-topic):
Remember, kids, the Internets are indeed SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS.
It’s always an ugly* scene … When Trolls Attack!
————————-
* Admin’s 5th candidate = IRONYGASM WITH BELLS ON
I will be very disappointed if Mr. N_B does not bring back “Lizzie”-engraved hatchet key-chains for all of us w/o pierced whatevers!
I think you mean: Lizzie-engraved hatchet key-chains/cock-rings.
Re Haiti: I watched about two hours of news tonight. The main issue, of course, is the horrible number of deaths and the damage to the lives of everyone else. In the background on screen, I noticed something that may not get much play in the press: poverty kills in more ways then you’d think. Poor people can’t afford steel, so they under-reinforce their concrete and don’t reinforce their masonry…so when an earthquake comes their buildings pancake.
To put it another way, it’s not that no one in Haiti cares about the quality of their buildings, it’s not that they never heard of building codes, it’s that people and nations living hand to mouth have more immediate uses for their money than rebar. It’s a logical trade-off – spending money on immediate basic needs rather than on modern construction techniques – that, like Russian roulette, works fine until it doesn’t.
I’m debating whether to get Mrs. __B a pair of the hatchet earrings for sale in the gift shop.
Had lunch once at the Alferd G. Packer Memorial Grill at Boulder University. No souvenirs.
Yesterday my space swine Piper died alarmedly. When the taxidermist opened Piper up she found a tennis ball right next to Piper’s tentacle. Sometimes there’s just too much sad news, ya know?
Really, it’s no different from him saying that we brought 9/11 on ourselves because of our wicked ways, or that New Orleans brought on Katrina because of teh ghey. Pretty much his standard response to any disaster, natural or otherwise, is “God did it because you were bad.”
or that all the Swedes killed by the Tsnami in Thailand deserved it because Sweden allowed teh gheys to be married…
(btw, what is it about Sweeden and The Netherlands that gets the wingtards all worked up. Most European countries have similarly ‘liberal’ aproaches to social stuff, but you dont hear the tossers banging on about Belgium or Austria)
how did our zombie reps on Sadly No miss this bit of blatant anti-Zomie propoganda:
http://www.truthout.org/111709Giroux
Had lunch once at the Alferd G. Packer Memorial Grill at Boulder University. No souvenirs.
I’m not so sure. What was the menu?
Gocart’s Law: The longer a Sadly No! thread goes, the inevitability of a Penis reference approches %100.
But isn’t this true of any thread or long piece of text? As Palahniuk would say, “On a long enough timeline, the probability of NOT PENIS drops to zero.”
Anyone who has read Naomi Klein can watch Haiti over the next few months take shape as an example of Disaster Capitalism in action:
First, there will be widespread, tearful appeals for aid, and Americans, generous by nature, will respond. Money will funnel into mainstream first-responding agencies like the Red Cross, which will spend it on immediate, life-saving concerns like search-and-rescue, food and medicine.
Next, NGOs like USAID will follow up with larger, long-term development programs, designed to stimulate the impoverished economy of the country.
Residents of poor subsistence fishing and farming communities will be relocated “temporarily” to hastily constructed camps farther inland “to make it easier to feeed them and protect them” while the rubble is cleared away.
Rebuilding contracts will be awarded to companies like KBR and Bechtel, who will hire very few locals for these projects, and only for the most menial, hazardous tasks.
Instead of rebuilding their tumbledown villages, residents will be told that new luxury resorts and golf-courses will bring in more money to the local economy, and everyone will benefit. They will be told that there will be jobs available for everyone, and life will be better than it was before the quake.
Some jobs will be available, but wages will be ridiculously low, and the Haitians will find themselves still living in the “temporary” camps, only now they will be punished for trespassing if they try to leave. The squalor of their lives will be as bad as before, or worse, but now they will be contained out of sight of the wealthy tourists who now relax on the beaches where Haitians once fished. Once free and poor, now they will be poor and enslaved.
This is exactly what happened over and over again on islands in the Indian Ocean after the Tsunami in 2004.
Anyone who has read Naomi Klein can watch Haiti over the next few months take shape as an example of Disaster Capitalism in action:
Yup. That was the most chilling thing about reading that Heritage Foundation blog post I linked to. It was fucking blatant.
A recent comment on a long-dead thread:
Lostlamb, the reason that wingnuts attack Sweden and the Netherlands rather than Austria is [deleted to avoid Godwin’s Law violation].
Steerpike:
I think you just predicted the future better than Nostradamus, man.
Tragic.
L.
Have another drink Sue Ellen
Thanks for the article.Really getting excited about read more. Will read on…