Three Turkeys for Thanksgiving
Posted on November 26th, 2009 by Tintin
ABOVE: Jay Nordlinger and Turkey (front to back)
Shorter Jay Nordlinger, America’s Shittiest Website™:
Re ‘Attack of the Seven-Foot Fairy?’
- Is it Thanksgiving already? Well, that means it must be time to start the War on the War on Christmas!
Shorter John J. Miller, America’s Shittiest Website™:
Thankful
- I am thankful for my self-published book. Soon a wounded soldier in Afghanistan who is receiving his very own copy, specially autographed by me, will be thankful as well, particularly for my autograph. By the way, here’s a link so you can buy my book and be thankful too.
Shorter Debbie Schlüsselputer:
Thanksgiving Is NOT for Vegetarians
- Vegans can bite me. Ever hear of moobs??
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
WOOOO!! FALL BREAK!!
SHOW US YOUR MOOBS!!!!!!
I will refrain from saying “Screw you Miller”, on this, the true American holiday.
Hey wait a minute. I don’t see:
1. There’s no hunger in America because there was tons of food in the grocery store when I bought my 50 lb. turkey.
2. The fact that Indians welcomed the pilgrims proves Europeans were right to slaughter the native people of America.
3. President Obama can’t truly appreciate Thanksgiving because he’s a scary Islahomofascist. (Avec intense analysis of his turkey pardoning skills.)
4. When Sarah Palin is president, we’ll really have something to be thankful for.
Damn you, I want the complete set!
Oh, what the hell. Screw you Miller! I mean, honestly, “And I’m thankful that guys like me have the chance to write pieces of entertainment that may help with their rehabilition in some small way.”
Having one’s brain try to jump out of one’s skull when reading such drivel isn’t really rehabilitation, now is it? And bonus points to SadlyNo’s spellcheck for picking up Miller’s misspelled word in his post. That’s the tight quality control we’ve come to expect from NRO….
I can’t believe that little shit, Johnny Miller, plugged his book again in a piece about Thanksgiving!
Debbie’s just jealous because she saw a pair of bobble-tits that were nicer than hers.
it is still possible to sleep peacebly because rough man stand ready
Veiled prison rape reference (cf Miller)
I won’t even begin to point out the spelling AND nonsensical syntax errors.
Unprovoked bile at vegetarians (aka liberals, duh), Muslims (hint! hint! wink! wink!), the Spanish (because they’re not American?), attempted cutesiness that’s just plain creepy, and feces…yep, Frau Schlüssel embodies the entire wingnutosphere in just two paragraphs.
Oops, I meant the French, not Spanish. Even better.
Shorter Debbie:
One of the great things about thanksgiving is keeping out people we don’t like.
Debbie Schlussel’s not only an asshole, she’s also a moron. Carnivores ONLY eat meat. She probably means “omnivore”.
‘Cause if she DOESN’T, and, according to her, a vegetarian diet turns dudes into chicks…does that mean SHE’S turning into a dude?
Merry Verbotenization!
“We live in a dangerous world—but one in which it is still possible to sleep peacebly because rough man stand ready to visit violence on those who would harm us.”
And if you play your cards right maybe he’ll pay you a visit honey.
Conservatives are fucking weird. Why do vegetarians offend them so much? The less people eating meat makes meat cheaper for them by lowering demand.
They just can’t stop obsessing about what other people jam down their own throats.
Several of Debbie’s commenters are conservatives vegetarians, and they’re ticked off at Debbie.
Fapping and fapping in a private-gym gyre
The wingnuts strain to hear the Paliner;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Conservatism is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The Dems lack all conviction, while the Reps
Are full of passionate intensity.
Surely some election is at hand;
Saint Ronnie’s Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: a waste of desert sand;
A shape with PENIS body and the head of a POOP,
A gaze blank and mindless as Miller,
Is moving K-Lo thighs, while all about it
Wind shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough men, their hour come round yet again,
Allow bad writers to sleep peacebly?
Several of Debbie’s commenters are conservatives vegetarians, and they’re ticked off at Debbie.
She’s being swarmed by a pack of Hitlers!
Happy “whatever you like calling today as long as it has some sense of grace within it” Day. Off to the Tart’s family for much food and repeated choruses of “Do your balls hang low?”
“Do your balls hang low?
Do they wander to and fro?
Do you have that strange sensation?
That they are touring cross the nation?”
Etc. etc. etc.
Hey! We’re simple folk.
I guess we could be thankful that Lil’ Debbie has a heavily-photoshopped 15-year-old photo of herself up at her website, so we don’t have to see what she really looks like.
Life as a zero-sum game; that’s the wingnut’s template, isn’t it?
“[Something all people in general have traditionally enjoyed] is NOT for [a particular group of outsiders to my in-crowd, of whom, for political reasons, I disapprove].”
You mean “moops”.
moobs.
MOOPS.
George, Debbie:
It’s spelled “boobs.”
You’re welcome.
Shorter Jay Nordlinger, America’s Shittiest Website™:
The plural of anecdote is too data.
Shorter John J. Miller, America’s Shittiest Website™:
YAY ME.
Alternate Debbie Schlüsselputer:
Fuck putting aside differences and drawing together as a nation to give thanks for all the ways we are blessed, today is really only about meat and vegetarians can get the fuck out.
Also, if you want to talk moobs, Hugh Hewitt must have suckled soy from his infancy on. Also too, I bet Debbie’s got back cleavage.
I was late to the party yesterday, but I just gotta say
I know you confused the hell out of me. Seeing the pictures of the Red Dawn remake, with all the Republicans thrown in the re-education camps brought a tear of joy to my eye.
I hear it’s got a tragic ending though – (SPOILER ALERT) The sonsabitches break out of the camps.
If that ain’t a tearjerker I don’t know what is. Makes Old Yeller look like A Night At The Opera.
I’d bet that wounded soldier in Afghanistan would rather be back home, unwounded.
Which is where he would be if not for Dumbya and company dropping the ball for 7 years for their Iraqi quagmire.
~
I’d bet that wounded soldier in Afghanistan would rather be back home, unwounded.
“Wounded” is understating it; he lost both his legs. I can’t get over Miller’s crassness, using this man’s permanent, life-altering injury to plug his damn book.
“And I’m thankful that guys like me have the chance to write pieces of entertainment that may help with their rehabilition in some small way.”
They don’t. Any other questions?
He didn’t lose his arms. He can still write an Amazon review for the book.
It’s not just the crassness; how egotistical and detatched from reality would one have to be to think that one’s signature in a book one had written would in any way, shape, or form help compensate for the loss of another’s legs? Did I miss the just miss the part in Waltzing Matilda where he sings about how he doesn’t miss his former life as a rover now that he’s got an autographed copy of John J. Miller’s vanity-published book?
Damn typos. Did I
miss thejust miss the part….John J. Miller:
In other news, a wounded soldier in Afghanistan now holds the record for shortest ever turnaround time from gift to E-bay …
.
Happy Thanksgiving, Sadlynauts!
I’m getting ready to make some white chocolate bread pudding…take that Obama, WHITE FRAKKING CHOCOLATE!!…and am wondering what I did with all of my “Let’s Destroy Christmas” paraphernalia from last year. Especially the Jesus-getting-butt-raped-by-horny-shepherds diorama…that one is just too awesome!
Somebody seriously tell me…do these moops get get paid for these offhand, 30 second bursts of in-creativity? If so, why not us? Are you listening, Mr Frank?
In other news, godlstein has written a vegetarian cookbook available on amazon, and is offering autographed cockslaps to real men who’ve been injured.
I am thankful that the Sadly, No! team chooses to keep on writing this blog, and providing us with the Shorters that make each day a little easier.
No shit, really. Thanks guys.
Now me and the girls are off to Snowwy’s new digs (the crazy man bought a house!) for their inaugural turkey day. I like turkey, but Lil’ Debbie’s still an idiot.
Gavin may have time to get a post up later today, but if he doesn’t, I’ve set up a Sadlynaut list for the Christmas in the City toy drive (cf and cf). The list here; please consider helping make a homeless kid really happy, and let me know if there are any (appropriate) toys you’d like added to the Sadly list.
Happy turkey/tofurkey day everyone!!!
They think vegetarians eat people who are in a permanent vegetative state and your average fReichtard has all of the symptoms.
Either that or they think it’s vaginatarians and they’re just plain jealous.
Who’s surprised that Lil’ Debbie thinks Thanksgiving is all about stuffing your face?
Anybody?
I was a lot healthier when I was vegan, ballooned up a bit since I stopped checking what I eat as much as I used to. Going vegan for a while wouldn’t hurt, Debbie. You might even look like that picture on your site again someday.
Via LGM godlstein wants you to pay TWENTY BUCKS A MONTH to read him.
Well, the pre-Thanksgiving turkey*, cooked day before yesterday, has been carved up, bagged, and frozen and the carcass is cooking down in a pot on the stove for turkey & rice soup; the cornbread and biscuits for the dressing were baked last night, crumbled, and allowed to dry; the celery has been sauteed in butter with the sage and other spices added; now I’m ready to go to mom’s to put it all together.
*(I cook about 4 turkeys a year since I can’t stand that nasty pressed turkey deli meat…and thanksgiving is the only time of year that I can reliably find turkeys that aren’t injected with 15% or more of that preservative broth crap. Plus, Kroger had the good (non-adulterated) frozen turkeys for $.37/lb! So I have my turkeys for the rest of the year stockpiled in freezers all over the place – and I only paid about $4.50 for each of them.)
How mean-spirited does someone have to be to write a Thanksgiving column that does nothing but sneer at the holiday menu choices of other diners that don’t affect her?
What a shriveled up little turd Debbie Schlussel’s soul must be.
efficient! I do something similar with chicken, since it my preferred poultry.
Happy Thanksgiving to all.
MOOBS!
MOOPS !!!!!!!!!!
Children, please.
Mantits.
preying mantits?
FYI, Glenn Greenwald likes Brad.
FYWP
http://www.salon.com/news/opinion/glenn_greenwald/2009/11/25/bolton
Why look! It’s a Cornustupida of Arrogance and Mendacity.
…again today.
Please everyone have a safe and healthy Harvest festival.
gobble gobble
O.O
preying mantitis
Happy Thanksgiving, Sadlies! Thank you for being you.
I sure treasure the two holiday traditions of the past couple yeasrs – George Bush holding a plastic turkey, and Sarah Palin gabbing away while Quasimodo cuts the throats of upsidedown turkeys flailing their limbs in aluminum cones.
Classic.
George Costanza said,
Mornington Crescent.
Perhaps you should explain the rules, Mr Fugit
(unless you were referring to the Peculiar Crimes Unit).
Via LGM godlstein wants you to pay TWENTY BUCKS A MONTH to read him.
Ha. It looks like they ripped off the Led Zeppelin IV symbols and the Three Bulls background.
Also: The QOR Club.
I sense cockplay.
What happened with the catch wrestling site? I thought that was supposed to generate some revenue.
Very old news, but Jeff gets the smackdown from Dan Riehl.
and
have made my T-day already. Thanks.
Zero comments. I assume all the action is behind the paywall.
Debbie’s so great, not caring if other people eat ham. Hooray for tolerance! Unlike a certain other so-called “religion” I could name but won’t because it is the subtext of everything I say ever. So it’s kind of odd that she is so bothered if someone eats tofu (although the Tofurkey is pretty awful actually. The Unturkey was good but they went out of business).
So if “soya chunks” sounds like “artificial feces for a movie set”, I wonder what “mashed up food stuffed into an intestine” would sound like, really. I mean, aside from a delicious kosher kishka. What I don’t wonder, by the way, is what sort of movies Debbie has been watching where feces, artificial or otherwise, are important.
And the phrase “certain substances and essences” totally makes Debbie sound like a sane person and I hope she makes a habit of talking like General Jack D. Ripper. The cromulence of it all would behoove me so much.
I am thankful that there are dedicated people scouring the wingnut blogosphere and separating for us the so-bad-it’s-hilarious comedy gold from the so-bad-it’s-bad dross.
Rick…um…oh yes! MORAN! Allow me to share my secret Thanksgiving desire. I wish to go through an entire Thanksgiving Day without reading in a newspaper, seeing on the internet, or have anyone mention to me that Native Americans have nothing to be thankful for today, that they are in mourning, and that it’s my fault.
My what a noble desire.
The Mayflower stuck around until April 1621, supplying the colonists with whatever food they couldn’t beg for, trade for, or steal from the Indians.
Mission unaccomplished.
Cornustupida
Shirley you mean ‘cornucrapia’.
my secret Thanksgiving desire
Give the man credit for honesty. The world would be a more beautiful place if those annoying dispossessed people would have the decency to disappear.
Ick ick ick!
Not only did I click on the Dan Riehl link provided by someone who obviously hates Thanksgiving, to read the most hideous sentence ever:
(Can you imagine? DON’T!)
but America’s Shittiest Website has gone shit-brown for Turkey Day, & (Google-style) have a graphic of a child in an “Indian” costume about to sodomize a turkey.
Now I can’t watch any more football, because I am struck blind.
Kind of OT, although it was on-T for the last post which was way too long to get involved with (“put your hands up and back away from the thread”)…
Anyways, this. Mebbes that pasty dickhead who wrote the article about food insecurity might want to help out with this. Or mebbes a fucking 13-year-old girl knows more and is a better person, eh?
The fact is, Happy Thanksgiving to True Conservatives in the Heartland. Screw you, liberals eleitists on the coasts. I hope you choke on your tofurkey.
Here’s to our troops. however, their C in C is a fraud and hates America.
Hopey Changey biased idiots? Get back to reality soon, before the Free Market does for you.
Who does Debbie think she’s fooling? She’s having bile for Thanksgiving.
Nuts to the face, right Ruppert? Get cancer.
Uhh… is WordPress working?
FYWP!!!
I am thankful that Gary has ridden me reverse cowgirl while I tatooed the Protocols of the Elders of Zion on his back.
That’s not the real Gary. The real Gary is a bigoted, prissy little chickenhawk who likes to fantasize about awful things happening to anybody who disagrees with him or has a different skin color, but would never actually come out and say “I hope you choke” because somebody’s fist might come out of his screen and pop him if he did. I don’t have to hope that this imitation Gary chokes on whatever pathetic bird he eats today, because even if he did, and sustained major brain damage from lack of oxygen before some elitist who actually knew something like the Heimlich maneuver rescued him, nobody could tell the difference.
And as Joe Max said:
November 26, 2009 at 18:44
I am thankful that the Sadly, No! team chooses to keep on writing this blog, and providing us with the Shorters that make each day a little easier.
No shit, really. Thanks guys.
Yeah, me too. Thanks Brad et al., and keep it coming!
Debbie’s got another article explaining how keeping kosher influences her Thanksgiving. It’s mostly neutral but she can’t seem to resist taking a gratuitous swipe at Muslims (halal is a ripoff of kashrut and also a “lite” version thereof) and animal advocates (Jews care about not inflicting needless suffering in animals, but they’re not PETA whackos*).
I mean, I’m a pretty argumentative person and all, but I find that I can usually give a 30-minute talk about cancer without throwing in something like “growth for growth’s sake is the ideology of the cancer cell” or “normally when these cells somehow enter the wrong environment, they recognize that they are not wanted, unlike C-plus Augustus and his imperialist stooge mercenaries argh sheep pimp argle blargle “**.
* I think she’s still sore over Agriprocessors and the UO certifiers and how PETA made it slightly more difficult to “deny that men do all they can to dissimulate this cruelty or hide it from themselves,” &c. Because you know, now PETA is a bunch of anti-semites of course.
** I am not often invited to speak at Liberty University, though.
Smut Clyde:
I once intended to do so. I thought I’d work up to it by honing my rusty writing skills on something simple and straightforward, like cricket, then some large gentlemen – at least I think they were gentlemen, though I would never have described an accent as “eldritch” prior to their visit – from the Ministry of Serendipity reasoned with me over the course of several days.
Debbie’s got another article explaining how keeping kosher influences her Thanksgiving.
Does she show any awareness of the dissonance between (a) “My self-imposed food restrictions are no barrier to my participation in a celebration of national unity”,* and (b) “The self-imposed food restrictions of those people over there make them Outsiders who must be Excluded! Unclean! Unworthy!” ?
I suppose I could visit her website and check, but I would rather talk someone else into doing so.
Come to think of it, one could argue that her find-an-outgroup approach to the holiday is historically the more accurate way of commemorating a bunch of rigidly exclusionist Jonestown-lite nutbars.
Does she show any awareness of the dissonance between (a) “My self-imposed food restrictions are no barrier to my participation in a celebration of national unity”,* and (b) “The self-imposed food restrictions of those people over there make them Outsiders who must be Excluded! Unclean! Unworthy!” ?
Cognitive dissonance is central to the wingnut personality.
Now WordPress is accepting my comments? Oddly enough, WordPress’ spell-check function registers “WordPress” as a misspelling.
Well, the comment I was going to post originally was:
Who does Debbie think she’s fooling? She’s having bile for Thanksgiving dinner.
I’m thankful for Gary and hope he finds the liberal disciplinarian of his dreams. Don’t stop believing, big guy, and don’t forget your safe word!
“We live in a dangerous world—but one in which it is still possible to sleep peacebly because rough man stand ready to visit violence on those who would harm us.”
This is such a beautiful example of homoerotic conservative war lust it deserves its own post
Don’t stop believing, big guy, and don’t forget your safe word!
HEARTLAND!!!
What rough beast slouches towards Bethlehem to visit violence on those who would harm us?
Whatever rough beast it be, rest assured that Mr Miller gets tingly as he contemplates it.
Of course, Yeats was predicting the current state of the Republican party:
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
This is such a beautiful example of homoerotic conservative war lust it deserves its own post
I’m squicked out by the humiliation-porn element.
“Effete urban couch-dweller (likes Gor cosplay, sleeping peaceably; trading liberty for a little short-lived security) seeks rough, virile, upright-standing man for protection.”
likes Gor cosplay
I see what you did.
I bet the safe word is “Wolverines!!!!1!!!”
But how do they get the numeral in there?
I wonder what Ernie Anastos is doing for Thanksgiving.
Brining the turkey, indeed.
likes Gor cosplay
Likes QOR cosplay
Or is that cockplay?
I see what you did.
Initially jesting, but then I remembered that Miller wrote that book that you mean people were so mean about, in which Portia the beautiful slave-girl (“who holds a vital clue”) is the Mary Sue character.
Just noticed that N_B was onto the Yeats business up at 16:09.
All your Saga references are belong to us.
All those on your Druidic Solstice gift giving list are sure to enjoy”The First Assassin” or “Liberal Fascism” or “The Kosher Vegetarian Cookbook (with cockslapping signifiers full color inserts)” You can get them all, singly or together, at Amazon.com. Just type the tag “buzzkill neocons”
Oh, I think not.
but then I remembered that Miller wrote that book that you mean people were so mean about, in which Portia the beautiful slave-girl (”who holds a vital clue”) is the Mary Sue character.
Ah, yes, the Miller’s tale… I thought the ass-kissing parish clerk was the Mary Sue character.
“”a heavily-photoshopped 15-year-old photo of herself “”
Do you mean one from 15 years ago, or one of her when she was 15? Because there is a MASSIVE bloody difference.
What rough beast slouches towards Bethlehem to visit violence on those who would harm us?
…
Whatever rough beast it be, rest assured that Mr Miller gets tingly as he contemplates it.
And Debbie will eat it, if it’s kosherly butchered. Then bitch about those who wouldn’t eat it.
but then I remembered that Miller wrote that book that you mean people were so mean about, in which Portia the beautiful slave-girl (”who holds a vital clue”) is the Mary Sue character.
Who holds a vital clue 100 miles away. I guess that makes it a distal clue, as well.
B to the BBB
As far as beating egg whites into mashed sweet potatoes and baking it up. — Mission accomplished! They were freakink deli ious. Also. The fresh ground nutmeg dnt hurt
Awesome kg! You really can’t go wrong with Ipomoea batatas.
All those on your Druidic Solstice gift giving list are sure to enjoy”The First Assassin” or “Liberal Fascism” or “The Kosher Vegetarian Cookbook (with cockslapping signifiers full color inserts)” You can get them all, singly or together, at Amazon.com. Just type the tag “buzzkill neocons”
Rats, I already made my purchases.
Vegans can bite me
Debbie is made of tofu??
she is fairly bland and pale…
“Rough men.” I love that no conservative ever remembers that women are in the military. I couldn’t have passed for a “rough man” even on my butchest day.
I’ve got a full belly, I’m surrounded by pets and loved ones. Fresh drink nearby. Jesus, I’m soft!
I’ve got the goddamned squishy belly to prove it>
“We live in a dangerous penis—but one in which it is still possible to blart peeancefreeancebly because rough manatees stand ready to visit post-objectivist discontinuities of scale on those who would address my post, libs.”
Remixed.
I hear a soldier in Afghanistan had a copy of The First Assassin in a breast pocket over his heart and it stopped a bullet and saved his life. And he was a rough man. Also.
she is fairly bland and pale…
And she’s certainly tasteless.
So maybe she’s why Hewitt has moobs?
Smut Clyde said,
November 27, 2009 at 1:57 (kill)
What rough beast slouches towards Bethlehem to visit violence on those who would harm us?
#
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 27, 2009 at 2:27 (kill)
Whatever rough beast it be, rest assured that Mr Miller gets tingly as he contemplates it.
AHEM. http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/26655.html#comment-1002305
I’m thankful that we had a good dinner and my parents are on the socialism-provided train home.
Smut Clyde said,
November 27, 2009 at 2:48
Just noticed that N_B was onto the Yeats business up at 16:09.
Yeah, N__B was all up in Yeats’ grill!
Yeah, N__B was all up in Yeats’ grill!
I was hankering for some Anglo-Irish breakfast meat.
On this day of giving thanks, I am thankful that I live in a country where I can choose not to click the links to those fuckweasels’ asshattery.
Shredded God-Damned Gerbil with Swirled Red Leicesters
All you do is get God-damned gerbil and put butter and pepper on top of it before risottoing it. That – putting those seasonings on top – is the secret. Whisk the meat, then put it on top of some leech toe. Put Red Leicester (at all grocery stores, make sure to get this Red Leicester too) over top of it. Put it in the microwave for 30 seconds. You can add to it whatever you want. Some people put a layer of solemn Reblochon cheese on it and just eat it like that. I chop up pasta filata, medium Gouda and Manouri cheese and put them on top, as well as goat skull. WARNING: You will never be able to order gerbil at a restaurant or bar ever again, as they simply won’t measure up to the ones you can make at home.
Miller’s rough men quote is one of those lines attributed to someone alwayswithout citation, and when you go look for the source, it just isn’t there. In this case, it’s George Orwell.
The person who actually wrote that line is Tocqueville, but he said roughnecks, not rough men.
Shredded God-Damned Gerbil with Swirled Red Leicesters
…awful lot of cheese in that recipe – don’t imagine you’d even be able to taste the gerbil
…awful lot of cheese in that recipe – don’t imagine you’d even be able to taste the gerbil
A strategy that works with spleen as well.
B^4 – How would you serve gizzard?
We all live in a dan-gerous pe-nis ♪
♫
a dan-gerous pe-nis ♬
♪
a dan-gerous pe-nis ♫
B^4 – How would you serve gizzard?
When I cook it at home, I simmer the bayjaysus out of them for a couple of hours, until they are tender and use them as I’d use any chicken part (think Ernie Anastos here), but I do like the fried gizzards that the Chinese restaurants often serve (the one on 4th Ave around 8th St in Brooklyn does them pretty well).
I often buy chicken hearts, put them on a skewer, and grill them up- a trick I picked up from the Brasilenos. Best part of the chicken (unless you’re Ernie Anastos).
B^4 – How would you serve gizzard?
With fava beans and a nice Chianti!
Do my bidding, Bastard.
Do my bidding, Bastard.
I hear and obey.
When I cook it at home, I simmer the bayjaysus out of them for a couple of hours…
The bayjaysus is the best part!
Do not meddle in the affairs of gizzards, for they are subtle and easily over-cooked.
Do not meddle in the affairs of gizzards…
“I don’t know how long they tortured him, but through the endless screams and inane babble, they discerned two words: ”
___________ _____________
(it’s a contest, folks)
“I don’t know how long they tortured him, but through the endless screams and inane babble, they discerned two words: ”
Bookmark this!
…they discerned two words:
“Dried dung.”
…for they are subtle…
Apple and pumpkin pie, leftovers. Mmmm!
I’ll stick with the white truffles.
…they discerned two words:
Turnip! Buttocks!
Hmm, I though I burned those photos.
…they discerned two words:
Morningtown Crescent.
Vagina boob.
And also.
Semiotic blancmange.
fucking pelicans
Mickey Kaus!
Lonny Martello!
“…they discerned two words:”
Shalom, gentlemen!
N__B, please accept this humble offering of one (1) internet. Use it in good health.
I actually appreciate this poem now, after hating it in high school. Duuuuude.
“…they discerned two words:”
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TwoWordsObviousTrope?from=Main.TwoWords
Enjoy this video of Palin being spoofed by Canada’s national treasure, Mary Walsh.
a quick sound bite from Palin.
That’s going to fester.
I LOVED Daniel-Day Lewis when he was with SAGA.
I am thankful, a day late, that someone else has clients as fucking stupid as mine: http://www.27bslash6.com/p2p.html
Who holds a vital clue 100 miles away
Slavegirls with absurdly long arms are TEH HOTT.
The fact is, Sarah Palin stands for freedom and USA power, which is why liberals hate her.
And John Miller continues to fuck that chicken.
And the discerned two words?
“Mechanical cyclops!”
I just saw a report on Russian Times television (RT is Russia’s version of CNN) on the free traveling medical clinics being run in the USA, providing health care to people who have none.
I can’t be sure, but it seemed like there was an almost smug overtone to the coverage, mixed with pity. Maybe I’m just imagining it, but just watching the report made me profoundly embarrassed for my country. Even the goddamn Russians don’t treat their citizens so badly.
With a lot of hard work and more than a little luck, Sarah Palin might make a passable night manager at a Wendy’s somewhere.
Not day manager, mind you. She’s not ready for the big time just yet.
‘Shire, Baggins’
Rose bud?
Rosebud Light?
“I don’t know how long they tortured him, but through the endless screams and inane babble, they discerned two words: ”
Abby Normal
Too Data!
“Bookmark this!”
“I’m thankful that so many Americans are willing to risk their lives to protect our freedom. I’m thankful that modern medicine can rescue them from terrible injuries that would have been fatal just a generation or two ago. And I’m thankful that guys like me have the chance to write pieces of entertainment that may help with their rehabilition in some small way.”
Of corse, big rough John isn’t going to risk his life, because he’s tto valuable writing thise pieces of entertainment to help rehabilitate amputees who protect his blessed way of life. Sort of like his hero, Ronald Reagan, who fought the battle of Palm Springs in WWII.
“Fact is…” and when they were done he was heard to whisper “heart land” as his eyes fluttered closed and a snowglobe fell from his hand.
“Fact is…” and when they were done he was heard to whisper “heart land” as his eyes fluttered closed and a snowglobe fell from his hand.
So the story has a happy ending, after all.
I just saw a report on Russian Times television (RT is Russia’s version of CNN) on the free traveling medical clinics being run in the USA
RT is evidently doing a better job that the national U.S. press, then. Those traveling clinics have been touring major American cities since summer. At every stop they are swamped by people in need of basic health services.
Given that they are operating a wealthy country whose political establishment is debating health care and insurance reform you might be tempted to think that even the existence these traveling temporary hospitals would be a major national story. Silly thinker. See, a couple of hundred Ignint McNuggets played 17th century dress-up and yelled at their Congresspeople, which is clearly the more relevant story.
“Fact is…” and when they were done he was heard to whisper “heart land” as his eyes fluttered closed and a snowglobe fell from his hand.
The fact is, no matter how hard Gary pretends to be a sled, Todd Palin still won’t ride him into the sunset.
So the story has a happy ending, after all.
I forgot to tell you about how he was visited by the ghosts of Wars on Christmas past, present, and future, who addressed his posts.
I completely realize that a couple of exceptions don’t make the rule, but an Orthodox Jewish family in my neighborhood are the only people I even knew personally who eschewed celebrating Thanksgiving. (Although they threw a mean Succot, and even invited their goyim neighbors to dinner.) It wasn’t that they couldn’t have made an all-Kosher turkey dinner, it was on religious grounds
On the other hand, I worked with some Iranian ex-pat musicians last Wednesday night, who were all excited about a recipe for turkey with rice pilaf stuffing they were trying out for dinner the next day, all completely Halal.
It’s just Lil’ Debbie all full of shit as usual. Stuffed with shit, one could say.
Before that, did his old co-work come to tell him that he can sleep his night safely and uninterrupted without worries and he can, infact, bookmark it?
Debs replies to a commenter who points out that men have been eating soy for centuries without developing breasts:
And how could you ever know? There are only two kinds of “facts” in her world: those that call into question her prejudices and can’t be proven, and those that support her prejudices and can’t be disproven.
That’s… that’s more than two words, Gare Bear.
Of course, how could I have missed it:
USA Power!
…they discerned two words:
Teh buttocks.