Yokel, 1; Global Warmin’ Perfessers, 0
More bubba-liciousness from Bob Owens at the Confederate Yankee:
ABOVE: More FauxtographyGlobal Warming Fauxtography?
Brian Ledbetter of Snapped Shot passed this along, a draft report from a global warming group that was too lazy to find an image of a flooded home that suited their ethos, and instead purchased a stock Photoshop creation to better sell their alarmism to the McMansion set.
If they put such little work in the images, it you wonder how much effort they put into the science of the report, doesn’t it?
If you click through Gomer Bile’s links, you’ll discover that his fauxtrage is directed at one photo (out of hundreds of illustrations, photographs and graphics in a 200 page draft report) which showed a house surrounded by a foot or so of “graphically rendered” flood waters.
Y’all see what I mean? That photoshopped pitchah is mower proof that global warmin’ is jes’ anothuh liberal lie. And it ain’t jes this pitchah I’m talkin’ about; them so-called science perfessers done used hundreds of othuh pitchas that ain’t real and was drawn by so-called artists. An’ anothuh thang: don’t them pointy-head perfessers know that photoshoppin’ a pitchah uses more electric powuh than jes’ takin’ one? Bunch o’ elite hypocrites, if y’all ask me. Now will one of y’all come on an’ gimme some munnah so I can buy mahself anothuh chah-cole gree-yul?
Really, folks, please buy Bob Owens a grill*, because if you do he’s going to wind-up in the burn ward the first time he tries to grill himself up a mess of pig trotters.
*Cf.
[Dialect updated thanks to the expert advice of Jude]
UPDATE: Brian Bedwetter at Snapped Shot, who was the one that got Bob all hee-hawing about Photoshopped floods and the like, doesn’t like us and has blocked our link to his site, a sure sign that he stands behind his work. So after you see his clever little Mohammed carton to which our link has been directed, you can copy and paste this link —
http://www.snappedshot.com/archives/2566-Climate-Fauxtography.html
— into your browser to see the page originally linked.
Gavin adds: Hey, what’s this written at the bottom of the report?
By God, Clif! Dude’s an idiot, sure – but regional dialect jokes? That’s the best you could come up with?
There’s plenty of stupid to go around in this article. It boggles the mind that all you could manage was to pretend that Mr. Owens talks funny.
I’ve noticed that Confederate Wankee is often wrong about things. I should develop some sort of theory on that. Then I’ll have it tested on Mythbusters…hopefully with the Build Team. Although Adam and Jamie seem like straight up dudes…I mean, Kari is Kari is Kari, you see.
Yeah, that’s the ticket.
Kari looks and talks like a woman I used to date. She also had a bit of a mean streak. Fascinating woman.
While searching for that one damning photo (which appears somewhere aorund pg. 62), he apparently missed the large DRAFT watermarked on each page, the First Draft – Do not cite or quote on the bottom of each page, and the occasional blank space saying graph/firgure under development. I’m sure people in the reality-based community would probably come to the conclusion that the picture is just a placeholder.
“this just proves that there is no global warming. The lefty scientists have no clue what they are talking about.”
Someone tell me this comment is satirical, and not someone’s actual opinion.
Please?
If they put such little work in the images, it [makes] you wonder how much effort they put into the science of the report, doesn’t it?
No.
Any other questions I can clear up for you?
I’m sure people in the reality-based community would probably come to the conclusion that the picture is just a placeholder.
Don’t worry, when the pic is replaced in the final draft, there will be much crowing from Jim Bob that THIS PROVES HE WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG! The headline will probably read “GLOBAL WARMING ATHEISTS PROVED TRAITOROUSLY WRONG!”
I’m sorry, even if that illustration appears in the final report, I don’t see the problem. This report is about the anticipated future effects of global warming, and isn’t a history. Honestly, why NOT use a photo illustration if it fits the graphic design better? It’s an accurate depiction of the effects of global warming. I guess the ‘get off my lawn’ conservatives are boggled by illustrations that LOOK like photographs. Technology, ain’t it awful?
Someone please convince Bobby-O that he can best show his devotion to Bushie and McStupid by flossing with at least four shotguns?
McW: There’s an even more obvious approach, but it may result in fewer posts.
Right. This photo fakery proves there is NO SUCH THING AS FLOODING! There has never been a photo taken of a home being flooded. Searching Google for Images of Flood home or flood house will pull up no such images.
Uh, wouldn’t that be a “chah-cole gree-yul”?
Just sayin’. I’m from Mississippi originally. I know the lingo.
You know…during the time of MahCharcoalGrillGate, Owens was living pretty near where my folks live. Despite being far inland, Raleigh gets hit with a nasty hurricane every couple of years or so (they like to crawl up I-40).
My parents own a grill. Know what they do when the storm’s coming? Wheel the damn thing into the garage. I think I’ll now go back to my original point:
OK, I started following some of the links Wankee cites, and reading the comments therein, and all I can say is “Whew!” The number of conspiracy theorists who don’t understand the concept of buying stock photos is staggering. There’s one site where the commenters are debating whether there’s subliminal messages in the swirling waters of the photoshopped flooded house.
somebody get a butterfly net.
Right, ’cause they’re the same thing …
… you dumb cunt.
.
Clearly in the section on future effects, the smarty-pants scientists should have gotten into their time travel pod and gone into the future and taken a picture of the flooded house. That they didn’t proves that CY’s parents never kissed at that high school dance and he therefore doesn’t exist.
Absolutely, Grand Moff. Don’t you know all climatologists are required to be graphic designers as well? They take that in second year.
Right, ’cause they’re the same thing …
Haven’t you heard? Scientists are all Photoshop experts nowadays.
Do you think he knows there is difference between science and scientists and the graphic arts and communications department?
Scientific team discovers Viagra and then produces and directs a commercial where middle aged man can not throw a football through a tire on a rope.
effing Brain Candy dude.
Damn you, g! I owe you a Coke.
oops, g beat me to it.
cur
Note the paranoid idiot use of the rhetorical question. Not “this proves global warming science is a hoax,” but, rather, “It (makes) you wonder…doesn’t it?”
The it-makes-you-wonder trope is kissin’ cousin to the venerable isn’t-it- interesting-that… trope.
Then again, maybe the poor schmuck just had a deadline to meet.
A deadline…in his IMAGINATION.
And look at all of those graphs! If this nonsense was real, they would include non-photoshopped photographs of instrument readouts for every single data point!
Seriously, though, on behalf of sane North Carolinians everywhere, I sincerely apologize for this d-bag.
hey, help me out here. I am having a “discussion” with CY about the stupidity of people that don’t believe in global warming. give me links or data to disprove his “32000 scientists don’t believe in GW”. (I am Fred Jones in his comments.)
tufdawg, you’re rassling with pigs. It’s not a good idea.
How about, ““32000 scientists also believe in the restorative properties of toe-jam but that doesn’t make me want to start eating it.”
This one is halfway there
“tufdawg, you’re rassling with pigs. It’s not a good idea.”
I know, but it is fun in a perverted kind of way, and it just pisses me off that people won’t at least even consider the possibility that the earth is warming. (even though, technically, we are in a slight cooling period now.)
i am getting my masters in geosciences and morons like CY, who probably barely even passed science in high school think they have all the answers.
Keep him going, tufdaawg. I’ve got a shot at bingo.
I think the oft-used line is…the number of scientists who don’t believe in GW is essentially equivalent to the number of scientists named “Mike” who do.
tufdaawg—just so you know what you’re up against.
And I’d help you over in Wankeeland, but Gomer banned me after I got a little randy with the ReynoldsBot.
i am getting my masters in geosciences and morons like CY…
I was gonna pick up a minor in Morons…
Doh, someone’s mad at the photo link because I am an anti-American hatemonger.
Anti-American hatemongers need love, too.
(sniffle)
I met those guys while running sound for their live demo show in Berkeley. Adam’s very personable, seems like he’d be a fun guy to go drinking with. Jamie is more… reserved – the intense, quiet type. Unfortunately, none of their team was with them. Kari… yeah… good looking, whip-smart, nice boots… my kinda woman…
You’d think these guys would be perfectly fine with artists’ renderings equating to proof of something. After all, we went to war with Iraq because Colin Powell showed Congress some drawings of Iraq’s non-existent WMD facilities, didn’t we? And if I recall correctly, Iraq’s entire WMD program consisted of some handwritten notes and sketches on a few sheets of paper. IOKIYAR, I guess.
I don’t know, he should be happy about this SN post since in that photo he looks like he actually has a chin, or did you guys do some Photoshoppin’?
Too bad the Dunning-Kruger Effect doesn’t have short-term negative impacts on selection in the human species…
So, in Chin/Brain-less World…a small, grill-tossing sized tornado swept his Precious up and away into the neighbors yard, and said grill was damaged such that it needed replacement, apparently in some fashion that isn’t visible in the photograph (I hadn’t realized until this point that charcoal grill technology had advanced so far beyond the “metal bowl that holds coals and a grate” that I was used to. It must have blown the quantum flux capacitor, or perhaps a plasma conduit ruptured.) — but global warming is just silly.
I think I just had an aneurysm. Do you smell toast? I smell toast.
Meanwhile in another Universe, Bigoted Northerner is explaining that their use of a photograph from the recent Iowa floods just proves they are using a national tragedy to further their political agenda.
dang, it’s like CY is proud of his ignorance or sumthin!
Hey, when I click the link in Clif’s blockquote that’s supposed to go to the photo, I get a page with a cartoon of the Li’lest Mooslim Bomber — see, it’s funny ‘cuz he has a bomb in his turban — and the following text:
Now that’s good stuff. Oh, and we’re a “bunch of anti-American hatemongers.” Everyone, update your CV.
Tried to go where the link sent me, and apparently SadlyNo! is not on the “nice list” there and anyone trying to go there from here is banned!
There’s a racist illustration of a terrorist with a bomb coming out of his headgear….with the caption “I’m MAD!”
The ole perfesser has dissed you guys here at SadlyNo!…must make you very sad and depressed!
Sorry, the CF link is good, but the link to the pic in the shaded box is where the banning is happening for some reason…
32000 scientists don’t believe GW
Um, so what? scientist is a very broad term to use. kind of like saying my podiatrist doesn’t believe you have a brain tumor.
So “SnappedShot” redirects you to some image calling you a hatemonger, and LGF says “you are a idiot.” Do any other sites block refers based on political disagreement?
“Hold the hatemongers” where?
The build team has been at the Dragon Con convention in Atlanta, GA, for at least the past two Labor Day weekends. I’ve met them, and Kari is a very nice girl.
FIFY
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
You are an idiot! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Between our legs.
I feel it’s important to mention that Kari had her butt scanned FOR SCIENCE.
i like how in the comments page confederate dickwad calls those who believe in the global warming consensus “truthers.” trust right-wingers to turn truth into an insult. they seem to already believe liberty is an insult, since they use the word “liberal” as an epithet.
eh, screw it. i’m in too bad a mood to cope with conservatives today.
I just left this message on the entry about what a bunch of meanies we are at Sadly, No:
Let’s see if it’s there more than five minutes.
Link?
Hoosier X,
Your comment’s going to be there for quite a while, pal. 😉
Regards,
B. “David Duke (D-LA)” Ledbetter
Well, I think I hold the record for having a comment yanked from CY’s ratty little site: 45 seconds. Nothing profane, just questioning his integrity (I got my answer on that one, by the way).
You mean my reference to “Five Easy Pieces” was misinterpreted by SnappedShot’s crack misinterpreting team as a gay joke?
Wow.
Just wow.
(By the way, Brian L., your link doesn’t work. Look like somebody can’t handle the heat. What if we promise to be politically correct enough to suit you?)
hey! they yanked MY post! now it’s personal.
funny thing is, it just looks like no one reads his site, because he deletes all his posts. because they’re all from people calling him and his 32000 mail-order scientists a bunch of dumbasses.
That Charles Johnson Robot IS malfunctioning. It should be “You are a idiot.”
Good grammar is the swastika of liberal fascism.
It’s reminiscent of the evolution denialists’ claims (of course), such as the old one about peppered-moth evolution in response to industrial pollution and subsequent changes in bird predation. You see, apparently the researcher of the original study staged a couple of photos so you could see both moth forms side by side. Staged photograph = evolution is false! QED (per Moonie crank Jonathan Wells).
The scary thing is that Wells is a smart guy, and got a PhD in developmental biology from Berkeley for the sole purpose of “debunking” evolution since it doesn’t fit in with Moonie church doctrine. A bit out of Gomer’s league, but same tactics all around.
[…] him Jerry. Race him. « Yokel, 1; Global Warmin’ Perfessers, 0 Low-hanging fruit » […]
Jonathon Wells is one of the geniuses from Ben Stein’s Expelled.
He’s not one of the alleged Expelled. He’s one of Stein’s experts.
I don’t think he accuses evolution proponents of being Nazis, giving him limited usefulness for Stein’s agenda.
Yeah, he’s been with the Discovery Institute (discovering ways to lie about science since 1990!) since the beginning. Being trained in an actual relevant discipline, he does manage to be more sane than many of the other cranks (while lying through his teeth, that is).
The fact is, apparently Wankee hasn’t banned me…but my “Gary Ruppert” was only up for a few seconds.
The scary thing is that Wells is a smart guy, and got a PhD in developmental biology from Berkeley for the sole purpose of “debunking” evolution since it doesn’t fit in with Moonie church doctrine.
I was part of the fundie education system from kindergarten through eighth grade, and again in college. We were given our choice of the following career tracks, depending on aptitude and what were thought to be the needs of the movement.
Lawyer
Teacher
Academic
Creationist
Business Leader
Pastor
Youth Worker
Missionary
It was like a weird cross between the homosexual agenda and the soviet education system.
What? He banned Gary Ruppert?
Has Gary just been DN the whole time?
“UPDATE: Brian Bedwetter at Snapped Shot, who was the one that got Bob all hee-hawing about Photoshopped floods and the like, doesn’t like us and has blocked our link to his site, a sure sign that he stands behind his work. So after you see his clever little Mohammed carton to which our link has been directed, you can copy and paste this link”
I am outraged. That is clearly not the real Mohammed wearing a turban-bomb, but merely a drawing of a figure who could, quite frankly, be almost anyone. This kind of disinformation is typical of the conservative community, and PROVES that there is no such thing as Islamic terrorists.
Durr, also those figures showing temperatures in the future are “projections” which is a fancy pants book-larnin word for made up! Durr, why didn’t these so-called scientists just send magic thermometers into the future, duh-huh? I bet these long-haired intellectual bald guys wear shoes an’ everything!
Plus I like to think of S,N! as more of a snark-mongering site. I sometimes feel bad about the whole “let’s mock stupid and/or crazy people” thing, so it’s important to remember that these guys are somehow agenda-setters.
Bud said,
I am outraged. That is clearly not the real Mohammed wearing a turban-bomb, but merely a drawing of a figure who could, quite frankly, be almost anyone.
Indeed. If they put such little work in the images, it you wonder how much effort they put into the logic of the post, doesn’t it?
You don’t have to wonder.
You can just read it.
Don’t forget Petersen’s Field Guide for Identifying the Logical Fallacies of the American Conservative.
Go to the Petersen’s Web site for a check list.
*swoon* Kevvie’s over there!
I sometimes feel bad about the whole “let’s mock stupid and/or crazy people” thing, so it’s important to remember that these guys are somehow agenda-setters.
It’s not just that. They’re agresively stupid. Proud of their ignorance, they’ll cut you if you try to shake up their notions at all. Look at the evolution thing They’re so myopic and petty that they simply cannot stand the idea of someone looking at the world different from the way they do. Look at the abortion thing. They’re so terrified of having to admit they might not know something, they’ll cling to long-disproved nonsense and scream about semantics instead of having to humble themselves before anyone. Look at the Iraq thing.
Stupid people don’t hurt anybody; assholes do. Owens’ problem ain’t that he’s dumber than a bucket of shit, it’s that he demands the rest of us be that stupid.
Has Gary just been DN the whole time?
The fact is, no. Many people have played Gary Ruppert over the years, including myself on numerous occasions. It’s like Hamlet. Everyone takes a stab at the role.
The fact is, there is a real, genuine Gary Ruppert. And he’s usually easy to spot, but he’s as rare as a Peruvian dumplesmfhsshf.
Dear wingers. We’re not anti-America. We’re just anti-YOU.
Goddammit! I wanna see some *mad science* ! CY and his ilk trash real science with their bullshit, they deserve to be set upon by mad scientists drunk on bathtub Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters drilling Schloss Confederate Yankee with honking big mean-ass death rays. We’ll drink your fuckin’ milkshake and toast yer grill, ’cause we’re SCIENCE!!!
I’m pretty skeptical about Dead Anthrax Guy, but I kinda hope he really was a Democrat. We need more Democratic mad scientists, not for killing unlucky bystanders, but for putting the fear of Darwin and Einstein into them. Doktor Sleepless for President!
What’s more, mad scientists have better barbecues.
“If you click through Gomer Bile’s links, you’ll discover that his fauxtrage is directed at one photo (out of hundreds illustrations, photographs and graphics …”
What number or percentage of fake photographs in a government scientific report would be problematic for you?
What number or percentage of fake photographs in a government scientific report would be problematic for you?
…said Anonymous, the most anonymous of anonymousites.
Actually, I’ve been to a lot of scientific talks, and given a few myself (I am a real doctor, not in climatology, by the way), and it’s pretty common to see stock photos, pictures from advertisements, and pics from sites like The Onion.
Also placeholder pictures in mockups, but that’s a no-brainer.
You know Anonymous, its not so much the number of fake pictures in the report but the declaration that all of the science in the report must certainly be garbage because of a SINGLE artist’s rendition.
Get it?
Ignorant accusation based on a total inability to distinguish fantasy from reality.
Some of Shakespeare’s best gags hinge on the concept.
Well played, all. The chawbacons over at the site that thinks Sadly No links have cooties are all worked up. If this is media criticism, no wonder things are as hosed up as they are.
As I left in a comment over there, have any of them ever created a work for publication that didn’t feature the use of crayons?
What number or percentage of fake photographs in a government scientific report would be problematic for you?
In a draft copy, a 0% level would be problematic to me. It would suggest that the authors were putting more effort into the images than into the science of the report.
Who f**kin’ cares. Get over it.
These fools are like people standing around in a burning building arguing about who set the fire.
Well, when the only content in a report that you can approach is the pictures they become serious business.
tufdaawg
give me links or data to disprove his “32000 scientists don’t believe in GW”.
How to Talk to a Climate Skeptic
It’s not like they’re positing that unicorns exist. Surely even deniers of global warming can accept that floods happen, with or without Photoshop. If this were a scientific paper on the Loch Ness monster, I could see the outrage.