Tragedy is when I stub my toe.

Comedy is when you get tortured, tied to a fence, and left to die.
~

“Lucrative sideline?” What exactly is the monetary value of a grudging apology from a bigot?

Shorter wingnuttia: How dare you call us on our bigotry and hate! It just proves that you are the real hateful bigots who are prejudiced against bigots.

I’m unclear as to what the beef is here. So someone said something extremely shitty and got caught? That’s the issue? Well, hey, save the super-funny fun homophobia for poker night with your buddies.

Well, hey, save the super-funny fun homophobia for poker night with your buddies.

Or not. How about grow up and recognize that most of the world is (thankfully) not just like you and you need to deal with it.

Crybaby tattletales? Is she in kindergarten?

I’m unclear as to what the beef is here.

Some comedian called an audience member a “fucking faggot” and later had to apologize because people who saw it had the NERVE to be offended and talk about it in public.

The average furry has more sense than to get near her.

I think the stupid cunt is right. And, of course, she should have no objection to anyone calling her a stupid cunt. Otherwise, she is a crybaby tattletale.

she should have no objection to anyone calling her a stupid cunt

She has neither the warmth or the depth. (someone had to say it)

Way back when, we told folks that they had better not throw Larry the Cable Guy under the bus.

Or else, what, whore?

Yeah, that’s what I thought. Dumbass rednecks who think they’re being persecuted because they’re expected act like the Americans they slobber on about…pathetic to say the least.

“The average furry has more sense than to get near her.”

True. Say what you will about the behavioral standards and pervasive dysfunctions of the fandom, &c.

And, of course, she should have no objection to anyone calling her a stupid cunt.

Really, she doesn’t. Wrong tack.

First they want to get married

OF ALL THE FUCKING UNMITIGATED NERVE!

Her first book was nominated for the Governor Generals Award (poetry).

Books for people who don’t read many books!

Well, so what? What’s wrong with bein’ sexy?

From her bio:
Her most recent book is the essay collection Acoustic Ladyland: Kathy Shaidle Unplugged.

Looks like the Death Panel had pre-approved her. Either that or it’s a reference to her massage unit.

Stonehenge
~

“Well, hey, save the super-funny fun homophobia for poker night with your buddies”

That would be strip poker, amiright? Bukake optional, but encouraged.

Shorter Five Feets Of Phewry = “If we can’t use egregiously vicious behavior to make the people we fear feel like garbage, TEH TERRORISTS WIN.”

The post is actually about the same length as the title … & that’s the good news.

Well, at least she has the courage to stand up for her laughably defective paradigm …

Comments are closed.

… yet is too gutless to take the inevitable flaming that her weak shit deserves.

Kathy Shaidle: proof that the gene-pool needs new filters & more chlorine.

To further jim’s observation, more of Kathy’s brilliant insight:

By Kathy Shaidle on Sunday, June 19th, 2011 | No Comments

The difference between Muslims and Jews:

99% of Jews reading this story went, “OMG! What an embarrassment! These people are idiots. Arrest them.”

The majority of Muslims around the world reading a similar story about imams stoning a dog would say, “So?” or “Sounds like a great idea!”

Oh wait. There’s a flaw in my argument:

The majority of Muslims around the world can’t read.

My bad.

UPDATE: turns out the BBC got the whole thing wrong. It never happened.

Things just haven’t been the same since pick-a-ninny and jig-a-boo went out of favor.

The majority of Muslims around the world reading a similar story about imams stoning a dog would say, “So?” or “Sounds like a great idea!”

And he knows this because?

Boy, does that person have one boring blog.

Wow.

Reading the post she links to, all I can think is, “What utterly clueless WATBs.”

Just unbelievable. Yeah, it’s exactly like Lenny Bruce. And this pimple on my ass is exactly like the Trail of Tears if it wound up in Auschwitz.

Fuck.

Beyond their inability to distinguish public distaste of content from government persecution, to think that simply being on stage should exempt anyone from criticism is absurd. I have to wonder if they’d write a slightly different column had the comic called the patron a “fucking nigger” instead, and if so, why.

Grow the fuck up. If you say it, own it. If you don’t want to own it, don’t say it. I don’t recall Andrew Dice Clay apologizing to anyone. He dined out on being offensive. For all their pissing and moaning, it looks like Larry the Cable Guy is doing just fine, thank you. A role in the new Pixar flick and a TV show on History! is hardly dumpster diving.

Shorter article Shaidle linked to:

“Sure, in the past, a comedian telling a dirty joke could be subjected to a months long, psychologically and financially debilitating trial that could end with imprisonment, but at least they didn’t have to apologize to the Huffington Post.”

I shall endanger my gay mafia card by mentioning that first we wanted to not get killed, fired, evicted, arrested, outlawed, driven underground, harrassed, demonized, disowned, defrocked, et cetera et cetera et cetera. Wanting to get married is a fairly recent idea (though a very old, even ancient, fact). Kathy could stand tall and lick my Santorum hole were I to allow it.

BTW, not a furry but a big fan of poker and bukkake – count me in.

My introduction to Lenny Bruce came in high school via a copy of The Essential Lenny Bruce, a copy of his routines that had been transcribed over the years. I don’t recall Bruce ever addressing an audience member in a bigoted fashion, although, admittedly, his responses to hecklers weren’t included in the book. I’m sure he probably dealt with them effectively, if not devastatingly, even vulgarly.

Calling someone a fucking asshole, prick, WATB, or (even slut, cunt, or bitch) refers (usually) to behavior, not status. Insults like faggot, nigger, spic, or gook are all status pejoratives and imply that the membership in such a is it self a debased state, making ascription of the attribute an insult.

May I play a mournful bassoon obligato at this point? I’m telling ya, it was brutal to specialize in that instrument in ’70s-’80s Alaska.

Four-year All-State in T-Sax, tho. Suck away, nerdy girllZ!

Way back when, we told folks that they had better not throw Larry the Cable Guy under the bus. Initially, it might be white males with southern accents who are sacrificed to the PC gods

You mean Daniel Lawrence Whitney of Nebraska? Seems to me he has a pretty great comedy career for somebody who ISN’T FUCKING FUNNY.

(even slut, cunt, or bitch) refers (usually) to behavior, not status.

Uhhh, Imma haveta disagree with that.

According to one story, Bruce once solicited and accepted a cigarette from a ringside Wilt Chamberlain, then, instead of putting it in his mouth, examined it and told the audience in a shocked voice, “He nigger-lipped it!”

The audience stirred uncomfortably for a moment–and then Chamberlain cracked up.

That’s edgy material. Calling someone a faggot is just taking a dump onstage.

But yeah, I do love how conservatives like to refer to slurs as “bad language,” as if dehumanizing and insulting a human being based on who he or she is is just like using the word “fuck.” That’s privilege in a nutshell, bitches.

I dunno, are we hanging or defending Jo Koy? An off-the-cuff response to a heckler during a stand-up routine – I can see how that would be a situation where “I misspoke” might be a believable excuse. At the same time, it’s hard to disagree with this:

Watching a straight male comic get on stage and attack gay folks or throw around an insulting ‘Faggot!’ while also bemoaning the difficulties in his life, I think that the comic lacks any sort of perspective. I wish those comics would step it up. It’s lazy, and disproportionately affects members of your audience in a way you can’t understand.

I totes agree that teh majority of assholes who complain about PC censorship are just borderline sociopaths with no balls that want to say Nigger and Faggot without getting in trouble, but I’m not sure if this is one of those cases.

re: (even slut, cunt, or bitch) refers (usually) to behavior, not status.

I know that Slutwalk is a new phenomenon, but teh ideas that they are marching for aren’t exactly recent discoveries.

First they want to drive, then they…….oops, wrong blog.

SHECKY LIEKS PIE!

jim says:
Your comment is awaiting moderation.
June 20, 2011 at 2:22 pm

Sticking up for yourself or for your loved ones is being a busybody now?

If your jokes bomb, STOP REPEATING THEM.

Comics sometimes say things that enrage people. The real reasons for that rage matter.

Blending all those different reasons into a shapeless homogenous stew to make your point is the stuff fail is made of.

LarryThe Cable Guy & Sarah Silverman aren’t being renditioned to a secret Gulag … or even losing their jobs.

If you follow the chain of links there’s more:

Videogum’s own Joe Mande has a stand up bit that he does (hold on, hold on, Joe Mande is not the nightmare) about being asked to perform at a college, but the organizer of the event asking him to please be sensitive about what types of jokes he tells, because some of the students have identity issues and one of the comedians they invited recently was booed off-stage. Joe Mande, surprised, having never heard of a comedian being disliked so much that he was actually booed off-stage, asked to hear what the joke was that was so offensive. “Oh,” the organizer said, “I don’t remember the wording exactly, but he said something like if he ever caught his son in bed with another boy, he would stab them both to death.” [At this point in the bit, Joe Mande makes a horrified face.] “OK,” Joe Mande told her, “well, don’t worry, because usually when I go on stage I tell jokes? Not my hate-crime fantasies.”

The comedian that Joe Mande is talking about in that bit, incidentally, is Jo Koy, a regular panelist on Chelsea Lately. OF COURSE.

Lenny Bruce was totally about the stabbing.

The comedian that Joe Mande is talking about in that bit, incidentally, is Jo Koy, a regular panelist on Chelsea Lately. OF COURSE.

With apologies to our gracious overlords, Sadly, No! I mean OF COURSE you’d want to get little facts like that right OF COURSE. Nonetheless, there’s a statement here also about how even lie-beral Hollywood with teh homophobia and something. ARGLE BLARGLE – Lib-tards are teh real ghey bashorzz!!

Urgh. Shoulda clicked through. Nevarmind me.

Nope, Tracy Morgan said something similar last week. Jo Koy said it some while back. WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT FAGGOT?

Okay, fall of your mom teh horse with an EPIC bit of redenigs komprehandshun FAIL, gotta get back in teh saddle.

re: behaviour based insults

What about cocksucker*? That’s a behaviour based insult** – is it therefore acceptable as a substitute for faggot? Slut, cunt and bitch are most definitely in teh same category.

* Sure cocksucker can refer to womens too, like your mom – but generally it’s used to mean GGGGHHHHEEEEEYYYYYY.
** What about blogwhore?

Uhhh, Imma haveta disagree with that.

Well, they include both group and behavior. As the old joke goes,

What’s the difference between a bitch and a slut?

A slut will fuck anybody. A bitch will fuck anybody but me.

Now there you go again. You’re overeacting. Just calm down.

Now, now I’m sure these comedians who have gotten their start playing before a more liberal younger audience wouldn’t mind having their religion, gender or skin color called something crude onstage as a response to their mild humor.

BTW, how did anyone “make” these comedians apologize?

Also, so Tracy Morgan was not only doing awful hatescreed as material, but it was stolen hatescreed? That’s what oughtta get him kicked out of the union.

* Sure cocksucker can refer to womens too, like your mom – but generally it’s used to mean GGGGHHHHEEEEEYYYYYY.

I once heard my dad and some of his friends generally agree about another guy they knew being a cocksucker. They’re WWII generation. They meant he was a ass kisser or brown noser. Had nothing to do with teh ghey. It came as a surprise to me that this was so universally understood by their generation.

Throwing glitter on an anti-gay politician is TERRORISM! PUT THEM IN GUANTANAMO!

http://www.bilerico.com/2011/06/conservatives_call_for_violent_response_to_glitter.php

BTW, how did anyone “make” these comedians apologize?

Well, waterboarding would be totes ok.

No fart jokes either.

Yeah, I think “cocksucker”, like “motherfucker”, has long since had its general meaning something different than the literally obvious. In my experience it is rarely if ever used to indicate actual, y’know, cocksucking.

a TV show on History! is hardly dumpster diving.

Unless it is a show about dumpster diving. (I’ve got one in development w/ the History Channel right now.)

Thanks for the credit, & sorry for bringing Five Feet back to public awareness.

In my experience it is rarely if ever used to indicate actual, y’know, cocksucking.

I dunno. There’s teh general ejaculatory usage like Zounds! or Odds Bodkin! or Great Ceasars Ghost! or Cushlamocree! but maybe with a bit moar wistfulness and/or regret. Like “Cocksucker, it’s raining again!” But outside of that, at least IME, cocksucker is used as a pejorative that indicates that the accused is gay. And I don’t mean “gay” as in actually homosexual*, but gay as in “worthy of contempt, similar to the contempt that our homophobically bigoted society** deems right for homosexuals”.

* But that’s how the connection works, so the implication of teh actual sucking of cock is sorta important.

** and “society” not meaning society at large, but rather the closed in-group of folks on teh playground. i.e. a group small enough to still be able to get away with using “gay” or “cocksucker” as an insult.

Also, too. Making public a comedian’s bigoted outburst to elicit an apology is using the media as a witch hunt and Teh Hitler!

Spreading radically edited tape of a public servant as fact so it costs them their job is “journalism.”

So she’s into homophobia, too? Last time I heard of her she was busy hating people of unwhiteness. Wow….how can such a little person contain so much shit?

Come visit me! I’d love to hear from you!

Calling someone a fucking asshole, prick, WATB, or (even slut, cunt, or bitch) refers (usually) to behavior, not status.

Slut, cunt, and bitch are borderline. Those three are disproportionately applied to women (and bitch to gay men as well) over men, giving them a status insult quality as well. (Cunt seems to be an equal-opportunity insult in the UK, but I won’t assert that with confidence. It’s definitely NOT the case in the US.)

Yeah, while cocksucker=bad person is inherently homobigoted, I think the link has been weakened in many ways. Much as the kids these days call everything thisfag and thatfag, less as a pejorative than with faux-disinterested affection, cocksucker doesn’t really bring to mind the sucking of cocks as part of the equation. Just like, present company excepted, motherfucker isn’t usually used to indicate the fucking of mothers. Motherfucker=bad person, as a societal meme hardly suggests general contempt for mid-life copulation.

HG,

You make good points. As a member of teh mid-life, my understanding of current cocksucker usage may be off. And there certainly is a lot of this-fag, that-fag being used. So perhaps these words are carrying their negative connotations without being linked to homosexuality or at least specific homosexual practices. Fudgepacker, however you gotta admit still specifically relates to behaviour.

Short people got no reason to live.

Yoo hoo, me again! Here’s me standing up for Geert Wilders, you that hilarious Dutch Parlimentarian who cracks jokes about the Koran being like Mein Kamp and banning Muslems from The Netherlands. Such fun! Of course “they” will want an apology.

Don’t make fun of the Italics tho.

Named Republican Legislator of the Year in 2006, McGee currently chairs the state’s transportation committee as well as the Regional Substance Abuse Authority Legislative Committee.

Anyone care to guess why he’s in the news?

Hint: he IS a Republican.

I blame teh gheys.

Fudgepacker, however you gotta admit still specifically relates to behaviour.

I’m pretty sure “shirtlifter” is in the specific category as well.

Will someone puuuulleeeeze glitter bomb me?

“Whether this has political ramifications for the future and for his future I think is way too early to tell,” Senate President Pro Tem Brent Hill told KTVB news. “We’re still waiting for the circumstances to unfold. Certainly none of us has had a chance to visit with Sen. McGee to find out how this transpired from his point of view.”

But Weiner needed to resign and forsake any political future, because, PENIS!

What behaviour would that be? Hmmmmm?

Fudgepacker, however you gotta admit still specifically relates to behaviour.

Goddamned Oompa Loompas.

Hint: he IS a Republican.

First thing that pops into my head is men’s restrooms and playgrounds. BUT I heard about this earlier on da boobtube. It’s just boring old grand larceny.

What is so scandalous about fudge-packing?

Regional Substance Abuse Authority

They really don’t like McG. in Idaho, do they? Leave him alone!

Oompa Loompas is scabs.

Also, why is it with these guys that it’s always exactly the thing they’re supposed to be most in tune with that they fuck up?

It’s not the anti-corruption crusader getting busted for drunkenly stealing and crashing a stranger’s truck, or the substance abuse and transportation dude getting caught with his hand in the till. NooOOOOooooo. Every. Single. Time. It’s them being precisely 180 degrees off. WTF? Is it just that it only makes news when the irony is so perfect, or are they somehow drawn to that with which they should never be entrusted?

What is so scandalous about fudge-packing?

Depends on who you are.

Rofl! I love it.

Oompa Loompas is scabs.

Not to mention illegal aliens!

Mitt will now demonstrate The New Romneycare!

I blame teh gheys.

Probly teh Joos, too. No matter. They’ll all be in the same camps when President Bachmann takes office.

I am introducing legislation to refuse entrance of any lighter or book of matches from Mexico into the US.

Also, I have that line in Python’s Philosopher’s Song, “Just as shloshed as Schlegel Shaidle” stuck in my head.

I can’t find my pants! Illegals stole my pants!

Probly teh Joos, too. No matter. They’ll all be in the same camps when President Bachmann takes office.

You know, I wouldn’t want to stereotype, but since profiling is all okey dokey ever since 9/11, I’ll go ahead and do that…
Bachmann sure looks like a good NAZI name to me.

I’m on Meet the Press this weekend to discuss Geh Glitter Terroists. Or was it Oompa Loompa wildfires? I forgot….Hey! Where the hell are my shoes!? Goddam it Cindy, I think the lawn guy stole my shoes! Or maybe it was Consuela!

Kathy Shaidling is an apologist for racist, bigoted, homophobic statements that she agrees with but wants to hide her true makeup behind a patroniizing superiority facade.

Ooops, my humor appears to have gone too far.

My story begins in nineteen-dickety-two. We had to say “dickety” because the Kaiser had stolen our word “twenty”. I chased that rascal to get it back, but gave up after dickety-six miles. (the children laugh) What are you cackling at, fatty? Too much pie, that’s your problem! Now, I’d like to digress from my prepared remarks to discuss how I invented the terlet…

They really fight for their rights to hate gays.

I shall endanger my gay mafia card by mentioning that first we wanted to not get killed, fired, evicted, arrested, outlawed, driven underground, harrassed, demonized, disowned, defrocked, et cetera et cetera et cetera.

Special Rights.

I shall endanger my gay mafia card by mentioning that first we wanted to not get killed, fired, evicted, arrested, outlawed, driven underground, harrassed, demonized, disowned, defrocked, et cetera et cetera et cetera.

We wouldn’t know anything about that. Romans? Never heard of ’em. Can’t hear you! Lalalalalalala!

McCain made me larf.

Kathy Shaidling is an apologist for racist, bigoted, homophobic statements that she agrees with but wants to hide her true makeup behind a patroniizing superiority facade.

Less of an apologist than a throat rammer.

You know, I wouldn’t want to stereotype, but since profiling is all okey dokey ever since 9/11, I’ll go ahead and do that…
Bachmann sure looks like a good NAZI name to me.

She’s got dem crazyass nazi peepers too.

By the way, you all like how she dropped that bomb at the debate? Where she said she was going to run for president? I was positively stunned.

The white youngsters these days amaze with calling their friends and other white people “nigger” all the time. I’m on a softball team where I’m probably the oldest player by about 15 years and you never stop hearing the word. The other night I was on third base and this guy says, “if it’s a fly ball to left don’t tag up unless it’s way deep, that nigger out there has a great arm.” And later in the same game, “did you see me take that nigger out at second?” The only black guy in the whole league is on our team so they were talking about white guys both times and the latter comment was made right in front of him. He didn’t react at all. Kind of how it seems to me that when English and Irish people call people cunts, they’re almost always talking about men and most people don’t seem to bat an eye. Maybe that’s what’s happening with the n-word.

I’ve been permanently banned from the Congressional Movie Theater.

” It’s just boring old grand larceny.”

it’s not the larceny that makes it funnay. The chairman of the transportation comittee, stealing a car while shit faced from substance abuse is Mark Foleyicious.

My story begins in nineteen-dickety-two. We had to say “dickety” because the Kaiser had stolen our word “twenty”. I chased that rascal to get it back, but gave up after dickety-six miles.

Hee hee, that is my Dad’s ringtone.

Cool!

Yo cracker, that homerun was so honky, you da trailer trash man!

Ooops, while being shit faced … As the chair of the substance abuse board…

First, they came for our rubber chickens…

Your honor my client was merely doing field work for an advisory report to the abuse board.

Not crazy:

McGee was found and arrested at 3 a.m., sleeping in the cab of the truck, registering a blood alcohol content of .15 when given a breath test. McGee, who said he had been looking for the “Promised Land,” was booked and spent Sunday in the Ada County, Idaho, jail.

What the hell is wrong with this new phone!? Everytime I dial it the goddam televison changes channels! Cindy! Cindy! Someones put my new shoes on the wrong feet! Cindy!

“Promised Land” is a cool name for a brothel.

Or crotchless undies.

Passed out from .15%.

Fucking lightweight should be run out of the State on a rail for not being able to hold his liquor.

Truly we have evolved to the pinnacle of civilation. I give to you crotchless undies for men.

“Certainly none of us has had a chance to visit with Sen. McGee to find out how this transpired from his point of view.”

This is called, benefit of the doubt, I believe.

Maybe he was.

Watch out Canadians, Bachmann now thinks you folk are totes hawt.

OOOOOOOOOO these babes are SOOOOOOOOOO HAWT!!!!!!!!

Giroux, now Shaidle

fapfapfapfpafpapfpapfpapfpafffffffffffffffffffffffffffaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaapppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp

Passed out from .15%.

In all fairness, he may have metabolized some of it while sleeping.

One problem: Canada did undertake a major stimulus program.

I am moving into my new federally-funded office next month. Also thanks to the feds for helping to repair the boiler in my building. And those are our conservatives.

Oh. I thought for sure Michelle had heard about this.

A shitbag writes:

Gleckman argues that this sentiment is “strikingly at odds” with her plan to eliminate capital-gains taxes and “remove 23,000 millionaires from the income tax rolls.” He is equally critical of Minnesota governor Tim Pawlenty’s plan to also scrap taxes on dividends and interest, under which, Gleckman says, “57,000 households making $1 million or more would avoid paying any income tax.”

But Gleckman reveals no contradiction here, just some deceptive writing on his part. He never acknowledges that these individuals would still effectively be taxed when the firms they invest in are taxed.

Under both Bachmann and Pawlenty’s plans, no millionaire would “avoid paying” taxes. They would pay the taxes, as they do now, when the corporations in which they own shares pay the corporate income tax. They just wouldn’t face double taxation of earned income and a tax bias against saving. And to Bachmann’s point in the WSJ, these investors would certainly still see the “tie to the government benefits that people demand” when they scrutinized the levels of taxation their firms were paying in the profit-and-loss statements.

They would pay the taxes, as they do now, when the corporations in which they own shares pay the corporate income tax.

AKA, almost never and not very much then.
~

BORED

mmmmmmmdyyhhdhhyssosyyssooooooooosoo+++ooossyyyyyy
mmmmmNmdyhhhddhyysssyssoooooooooooooo++oooosysssyy
mmmmNNmdyhhhddhhhysosssssssooooo+oo++++oooossyyyhm
NmmNNNmhyyhhddddhhsoosysoo++++//:////////+++osyyhh
NNNNNNmhyyyhddddddhsosoo+++//::::/+++++//////+::/s
NNNNNNmhyyyyhdddmhyssssso+/:::-://+ooooooo+:--:--/
NNNNNNNhyyyyhdddddhyssooo/-::://+oosoosys+/:-:/::/
NNNNNNNhyyyyhdddsosyyssoo:-://+/osyyyyssys::::///o
NNNNNNmhyyyhdddh++::hssso/://////syysyysys+:::///o
NNNNNNmhyyyhdddy+/::yssss+////::/ssooooooso+++++oo
NNNNNNNhyyyhdddy++//oo/ooooooo++ossooooosoo+++ooos
NNNNNNNhyyhddddyo++//o++++oossyyysssssssysssoooo++
NNNNNNNhyyddmdhyso++++++ooossyyyhyssssyhhyyssoooo+
NNNNNNNhyhddmhyysssoooooossyhhddmhyyyyhdddhyssssoo
NNNNNNNhyhddmhhyssssssssyyyyydmmNhyyyyyhdddhyyyyss
NNNNNNNhhdmmmddhyssssyyyyyyyydmmMhyysyyyyhdddhyyys
NNNNNNNhhdmmmmdhyyyyyhhddddddmmNNdhhhhhhhhhdmmdhhy
hhdNNNNdhhmmmmdhhhhhddddddddddmmNmhhdmmmmmmmmmmmmd

what about the syrup? huh? Huh? C’mon, tell me. Sugar makes sugar levels lower? I don’t get it. Soooo, what’s up?

In all fairness, he may have metabolized some of it while sleeping.

Yeah, I thought of that, but still… ranting about the promised land at .15 is as bad if not worse. Maybe two hours between passing out and discovery, that’s what, one drink cleared, maybe two?

If knocking back a six pack turns you into a blithering idiot, you have no place in either politics or a bar.

Hmmm. Let me rethink that “blithering idiot” and “politics” thing.

Hmmm. Let me rethink that “blithering idiot” and “politics” thing.

One of these makes one considered gifted in the other.

“NNNNNNNhyhddmhhyssssssssyyyyydmmNhyyyyyhdddhyyyyss”

Ah, yes. Totally agree.

The one time I ever got Breathalyzed (They were gonna charge me with Physical Control, because I was drunk and had my car keys in my pocket, even though I wasn’t driving and in fact my car wouldn’t run), I blew .16, and I was completely coherent and backwards-counted just fine. I couldn’t walk a perfectly straight line with my toes touching my heels because I never could, being knock-kneed, slew-footed, and with no vestibular balance.

This guy’s a lightweight.

As I mentioned in the last thread, I ‘used’ her material a lot when Steynwatch was alive and well, and she really is the nastiest piece of work I have ever come across on teh intertubes. Tis not just homophobia, racism & islamophobia are part of her screed, as well as a very disturbing hatred of liberals.

I had my own ‘brush’ with her after commenting on her website about 3 years ago. We had a brief exchange of emails, hers containing threats (legal at first, got creepier later) and insults. Mine were wind-uppy at first, but one particular one sent her over the edge. She had recently got married, and I made some crack about her husband being deaf as well as blind and that really threw her into a loop. Our last correspondence, obviously written when she was drinking, was so full of venom against myself and Mrs lobbey, that I was forced to report her to the authorities. The creepy part was that she had figured out my real name and where I lived.

The authorities in canada must have taken action, as I never heard back from her again, although I did get a number of silent phone calls a few weeks later. Was part of the reason I gave up Steynwatch (laziness and an inability to write being the other 2), don’t really want to invite crazy people into my life.

Warning to anyone tempted to comment over at her mango patch.

gocart mozart said,
June 20, 2011 at 23:08

McCain made me larf.

Me too.

that hilarious Dutch Parlimentarian who cracks jokes about the Koran being like Mein Kamp

Mein Kamp
A wacky sitcom about a teenage Hitler’s time as a summer camp counseler. In the pilot episode, he organizes the blond kids and gets them to lock all of the Jewish children in the outhouse.

It could happen – someone greenlit “Heil Honey, I’m Home”, after all

That shitbag that Sub referenced is a piece of work. While claiming that Gleckman is engaging in “some deceptive writing,” the shitbag fails to note that Pawlenty also proposes to lower the corporate tax rate to 15%.

He also writes that the millionaires “just wouldn’t face double taxation of earned income…”. This is just wrong. “Earned income” has a specific meaning in the Tax Code. It is income from wages. Income from interest and dividends is called “unearned income.”

This guy also shows some love for the “Fair Tax.” I can only hope that more of the Rep candidates will join Cain in pushing for it. It is a sure loser, in that there is nothing fair about it.

And those are our conservatives.

Well, yeah, but they were forced to do it at knifepoint. I don’t think Harper’s new majority government will be enacting any stimulus programs, no matter the situation, unless it is to stimulate more tar sands development.

Flawed prototype units destined for destruction manage to escape from the cloning lab. One is a neurotic mess, one is a womanizing lothario and the third is truest to the original, albeit in a three foot tall body. Follow their wacky antics on Two and a Half Hitlers.

I suppose I could make the argument here that just like those who invest money in the corporation I work for, I too invest in that corporation. I invest time and effort as well as intellectual property. The company pays taxes (in theory) on the profit they earn from my work. So by this idiots reasoning, those of us that pay income tax are also being “double taxed”.

Grizzled and cantankerous war criminal hiding out in the backwoods of some third world country tells his children amusing anectdotes about his zany adventures back in the twenties. See the story from before Mein Kampf in How I Met Mein Führer.

Follow the antics of the doctors hired by Josef Mengele to travel around occupied Poland performing medical experiments in:

M*A*S*H
(Mobile Aryan Surgical Hospital)

OK, I just made myself puke

I’m reading all the interesting ideas for new television programming on here and I’m thinking: You know, that’s better than what’s on these days. I’m also thinking that there’s at least one actor who reads this stuff as well as at least one writer and I’m thinking this material should be showing up on my small screen very soon. Perhaps in a SCTV or Kids in the Hall sort of format.

“NNNNNNNhyhddmhhyssssssssyyyyydmmNhyyyyyhdddhyyyyss”

Ah, yes. Totally agree.

Oh come on! That’s total bullshit an you know it.

Each episode a collection of vignettes in the lives of the Secret Police as they round up dissidents, look for love and escape the wrath of the autocratic tyrant that is their Chief. Bound for a record number of Emmy awards it’s Hitler Street Blues.

Sponsored by Panzer Strike Cigarettes, the latest and greatest songs of the Fatherland – it’s Your Hitler Parade.

Who steps the goosiest? Who salutes the heiliest? Who sings the Horst Wessel Song with the most verve? Find out on “American Hitler!”

I Love Eva

“Eva, I’m home”

(after learning about the incident in the munitions factory where conveyer belt runs too fast and she ends up shoving unattached bomb fuses into her pockets)

“Eva, you have some ‘spaining to do!”

Ya know–somehow I ended up on mailing lists for all these asshole Democrats, like Obama and Biden. Naturally, there has been a sharp increase in the emails begging for money lately.

My response to the last one:

I’m not giving you people anything. Ask those billionaires who are still enjoying Bush’s tax cuts for money and leave me alone.

I know nobody will read it, but I had to say it.

And we can’t forget reality TV:

Survivor…

No, I can’t do it — too easy and too tasteless

Ten years ago, a charismatic nationalist rabble-rouser was sent to prison by a military court for a crime he did commit. This man promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Berlin underground. Today, still wanted by the government, he survives as a soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find him, maybe you can hire… The Adolph-Team.

And we can’t forget reality TV:

No, I can’t do it — too easy and too tasteless

How about Big Brother? Oh, wait…

He’s the Chancellor for life of a major European nation. They are twenty blond hotties looking for love. Watch him choose on “The Hitchelor.”

A forensic anthropolgist and a Gestapo agent team up to chronicle the physical characteristics of the skulls of untermenschen in the riveting drama “Bones”

Perfect Stranglers

Straight-laced, uptight, semi-panicky low-level journalist working for the Volkischer Beobachter has hilarious encounters with wacky and eccentric long-lost cousin from Occupied Ukraine, who has kooky sayings, and does ridiculous dances.

Drafted together into the Shutzstaffel in 1943, the zany duo become concentration camp guards specialing in piano wire executions. Zany fun!

Are You as Smart as a Bolshevik?
The winner gets to go home, The loser gets an all expense paid train vacation to a mystery destination

How I Met Your Fuhrer

The story starts in 1930, but is told in flashback from 1960. Our narrator, Hans, is telling his children about living in Munich and looking for a political leader to follow

Hmmmmm

Not a horrible idea.

Compete in a trivia contest with Creationist-loving self-important gasbag for treasured items from his collection of WWII memorabilia in Win Ben Stein’s Hitler.

hhdNNNNdhhmmmmdhhhhhddddddddddmmNmhhdmmmmmmmmmmmmd

+1

Wolf Blitzkrieg brings you today’s news on The Situation Hitler.

hhdNNNNdhhmmmmdhhhhhddddddddddmmNmhhdmmmmmmmmmmmmd

OH-I know–the sound of those old modems. Next thing you hear: “You’ve got mail”.

Right?

Don’t forget about the Axis Allies:

A group of tourists are shipwrecked on what was supposed to be a three hour tour Japanese-controlled South Pacific atolls:

Girrigans Isrand.

Oh. Em. Gee. I am so sorry Intoortubules. Some many posts, so many lame teevees ideas before I got to this. Well bettar late than nevar.

Now, this is the story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute, just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became Führer und Reich Chancellor

In Upper Austro-Hungary, born and raised
On the playground was where I spent most of my days
Singin’ and drawin’ paintin’ in water
And all plottin some German Land of the Father
When a couple of jews
Who were up to no good
Startin making trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
But I will get them back, yes I will, see if I don’t BwaaaAHHahaHAhaAHaahaH!!EIN-ty-elf!! waggen!

The East Bunker

Political drama set in the Chancellory bunker in 1945. Rivalry, intrigue, betrayal, and triumph of the will in the halls concrete-encased tunnels of power. Beyond the main story-arc centered on the Fuehrer, the ensemble cast–Bormann, Himmler, Goebbels, Goering, Keitel, and Jodl–provides dramatic insight into the nitty-gritty of domestic power politics set against a backdrop of heightened international tension.

Wasteful spending that is apparently not wasteful.

This may shock you, but Republicans are a bit hypocritical when it comes to spending.

Most excellent comment from same:

Marriage is a SACRED institution, which is why in the USA we have Elvis weddings, underwater weddings, shotgun weddings, drunken weddings, Civil War re-enactment weddings, nude weddings, skydiving weddings, hippy weddings, Star Trek Kingon weddings, knights of the round table weddings, Star Wars weddings, and dog weddings.You really must show respect for the institution.

Speaking of Hitler…
~

Two and a Half Jews (umm, a little too dark)
Skins (again with the dark?)
Extreme Makeover: Eugenics Edition.

better quit this whole thread until this mood passes.

Fatherland Knows Best
Third Reich from the Sun
Everybody Loves Adolph
The Amazing Master Race

Speaking of Hitler…

You can use that phrase any time.

Open Letter to Callista Newt Gingrich.

Dear Mrs. Newt Gingrich the third,

I understand that your current endeavours have hit a bit of a snag with personnel, but I am delighted to hear that your campaign will continue on. In fact, I am writing to you to offer my services as Campaign Manager Entire Staff Including Administrative Personnel. You can rest assured that I am the right Dragon-King for the jobs, as I understand that the goal of the campaign has nothing to do with merely winning the nomination and the Presidency. This campaign is about Winning the Future with American Solutions *wink wink*. Indeed, all of America knows how Newt behaves when he’s under the stress of an important job and it’s in our best interests the name of the sanctity of marriage that I’ll do my best to ensure that situation never arises. Look at my resumee – I have nevar been part of a winning campaign!

Call me and we can discuss some of the creative ways ideas I have for official campaign mailers and the potential of doing market research and targetted advertising opinion polling with matching campaign funds.

Yours,
Dragon-King Wangchuck

Hey, that’d make a pretty good blog entry. If only I had a blog to post it to.

I could read the thoughts I’m thinkin’
I could argue with Abe Lincoln
If only I had a blog

A comedy about concentration camps! With bumbling POWs, and sardonic Nazis…. Hitler’s Heroes!

….wait, that’s not quite it.

f only I had a blog to post it to.

tell me about it.

Are You as Smart as a Bolshevik?

HAhahahhaa

Law & Order – Schutzstaffel Division

How about a comedy about a wacky prisoner-of-war camp? Or would that be too tacky??

Law & Order – Schutzstaffel Division

It’s just not the same with Leonhard Briscoe.

I meant “without,” but it actually works with the mistake…

“How about a comedy about a wacky prisoner-of-war camp? Or would that be too tacky??”

I was about thirteen when a friend told me that Hogan’s Heroes actor Bob Crane had been beaten to death a few years earlier. I made a callous joke about being beaten in the masturbation sense (not knowing about Crane’s sex life and the details of the incident). My friend reprimanded me and got very serious. The odd thing is that this friend was, even then, creepy and violent — perhaps a sociopath; he went to prison in his early twenties for a contract killing and is still there.

I am sorry this story isn’t funnier, if anyone can make light of it, be my guest.

Save the cows, save the world!.

The odd thing is that this friend was, even then, creepy and violent — perhaps a sociopath; he went to prison in his early twenties for a contract killing and is still there.

I am sorry this story isn’t funnier, if anyone can make light of it, be my guest.

I LOLed.

How about a comedy about a wacky prisoner-of-war camp? Or would that be too tacky??

Ahem, woodrowfan. Ahem.

Fudgepacker, however you gotta admit still specifically relates to behaviour.

Workers in the confectionary business have traditionally held a low status.

Workers in the confectionary business have traditionally held a low status.

They may be lowly, but they’re delicious.

Speaking of Nazis,

And Shaidle,

Wow. She links to vdare. As if it’s completely normal and legit.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu……………

Obviously, the most notable fact about street crime in America is that blacks commit a disproportionate share. And, the most obvious reasons for this are the same reasons as why, say, blacks are disproportionately represented playing defense in the NFL. Here is Lawrence Taylor famously breaking quarterback Joe Thiesmann’s leg. You look at L.T. and say: he’s got all the tools it takes to be a really good mugger.

o0
O

They may be lowly, but they’re delicious.

Brother!

Zombies, eh?

Call the hall! Unsafe working conditions!

We don’t have to worry about the ref calling time because of hitting below the belt.

How about a sitcom about a sociopathic kid living in a typical Austrian suburb, and getting into wacky misadventures? Leave it to Hitler.

I am sorry this story isn’t funnier, if anyone can make light of it, be my guest.

I laughed because people are awful, aren’t they?

You mean those same “gene” things you keep telling me make some men stick their junk up another guy’s butt might make other guys stick a gun in somebody’s face?!

Hi there! Me again! Giggle, I just gave away my favorite line to read and reread when I have quiet time with the Black & Decker. Hope I gave you all a thrill you just can’t get out of your mind!

Beef. It’s not just what’s for dinner anymore.

Obviously, the most notable fact about street corporate crime in America is that blacks whites commit a disproportionate share.

Hmmm, must in der genes or sumptin’.

Nothing about the SCOTUS Wal-Mart decision? Huh.

Nonnymuss has this site confused with a news blog.

Kos is thataway ————>

Beef. It’s not just what’s for dinner anymore.

Soylent brown

Nothing about the SCOTUS Wal-Mart decision? Huh.

Spoke on the phone with my aunt- my cousin is in Manhattan at a rally protesting the decision. I come here for the LULZ0RZ, it keeps me from banging my big bald head against a wall, or a wingnut.

Funny how Christians hate the idea of evolution, yet incontrovertably prove that natural selection is alive and well:

Dublin, Ireland
Homes and a Roman Catholic church in Belfast, Northern Ireland, came under attack last night in the city’s worst night of sustained violence in recent years. And as riots erupted in a divided Catholic and Protestant area, many are asking why the Ulster Volunteer Force (UFV), the pro-British paramilitary organization being held responsible for the violence, has refused to go away despite having supposedly destroyed its weapons.

Kos is thataway ————>

Good lord, man. How could you send someone to that psych ward?

Hey, I don’t appreciate your characterizatoin of DKos as a “psych ward”, as you so “eloquently” put it.

Soylent brown POOP

Fitzr’d for Innertube traditions an’ all.

Good lord, man. How could you send someone to that psych ward?

zombie, here.

“Soylent Brown™ is Poop-le!”

I like the way you think, Rev.

“it keeps me from banging my big bad bald head against a wall, or a wingnut.”

Fixed four yew.

Fixed four yew.

You’re a thorough man, Fenwick! Hey, when are you planning to move west?

Well, that’s what I get for missing your blog, B^4. I spend too much time here, I guess.

Whale: I thought your Third Reich sit-com titles were teh bestest ever.

*slips back into the shadows*

Well, that’s what I get for missing your blog, B^4. I spend too much time here, I guess.

I just threw up that post a few minutes ago, Rev.

*slips back into the shadows*

Not until you throw up a name for a Sitlercom.

Whale: I thought your Third Reich sit-com titles were teh bestest ever.

Was that because I din’t offer any? Or were you speaking in the future tense:

Set in Hawaii, the tale of the Third Reich’s spies in paradise: “Hitler Five-O”

A time traveling autocrat who never uses peaceful means when guns and bombs will do: “Dr. Hitler”

An astronaut finds a lamp on a deserted island; when he rubs it*, out pops a magical dictator: “I Dream of Hitler”

Nah, you’re right, those were fuckin’ hilarious.

*uh huh.

B^4: I want to list my tiny rowhouse in spring 2012.

I’ve worked out 2005 miles drive in detail.

I’m doing some advance packing now. Many hanging files. Also packing up a substantial part of my library. It will be easier for painters to move around. I’ll keep the boxes neatly stacked and labelled upstairs in the bedroom, writing room, and library.

I believe the house will show better: prospective buyers can imagine their own furniture and their own decorative things on the walls, their own lamps and lightining.

Anyway, this big effort is one of several things that have diverted my attention from S,N. (And I may have to defer the Duchy indefinintely. I dunno.)

It was Thread Bear wot put up the mostest bestest ever Hitler sit-coms. My memory is like Swiss cheese.

Thread Bear….Whale Chowder…tigris…y’know, I was confused by multiple mammalian critters and such…which are my mostest bestest-ever favoritest kinds of critters.

Something tells me it’s all happening at the zoo.
I do believe it, I do believe it’s true….

So the next crisis the wingnuts get their knickers in a twist about, can we say they’re “soylenting themselves?”

Actually, I can’t get too squicked out about this; what food item isn’t ultimately recycled shit? What, too few steps?

Not until you throw up a Sitlercom.

I tried two up-thread. (Look for titles in bold.)

Okay compadre, I’ll try another before the game comes on. (I loves me some baseball plenty much!)

Before I forget: ‘Girrigan’s Island’

Quel fromage.

Actually, I can’t get too squicked out about this; what food item isn’t ultimately recycled shit? What, too few steps

As I like to sum up existence: Everything’s made of shit, & we’re all dying.

What with Hitler being rebaptized a Mormon (repeatedly), I think a sitcom set in the upper levels of the Celestial Kingdom (the one where they get to keep their genitals), would lend itself to many zany antics.

Or maybe a game show where those consigned to Outer Darkness™ vie for a spot in the CK? Name that Hitler?

A gameshow where contestants answer trivia questions but you must frame your answer in the form of a scream of agony: “Hitlerdy”

What with Hitler being rebaptized a Mormon (repeatedly), I think a sitcom set in the upper levels of the Celestial Kingdom (the one where they get to keep their genitals), would lend itself to many zany antics.

Does Hitler get a second ball?

Gestapo the Pigeon!

Wait. Too meta?

Does Hitler get a second ball?

A sequel to Rollerball: Hitlerball—Descended!

Jail bird?

Gestapo the Pigeon!

Not for my cartoon-addled brain.

How about Schweinhund and Son?

I thought burgers were mostly poop already, thanks to the underfunding and defanging of the USDA?

Also: Hitler Knows Best.

Something tells me it’s all happening at the zoo.

What makes you think that?

Hitlerwood Squares

Ripley’s Believe It Or Nazi.

CSI: Hitler

The Hitlermooners

“Bang-zoom, to the moon Alice Eva.”

Also: Hitler Knows Best.

Also Also: Hitler Knows Brest.

The Hitlermooners

I am so lucky I wasn’t drinking anything when I read this…

Benny Hitler

Aldoph’s Bunker Place

Will and Race

All My Hitlerjugend

Tuesday’s program: The Gauleiter rigorously questions Bertha about the missing ration books. Newly-widowed Wilhelmina, through grieving for Col. von Lebensraum, vows not to give into defeatism and steels her will resolutely, with renewed dedication to the Volk.

Dietrich returns unexpectedly on leave from Festung Brest, to find Lili in the arms of Oskar, his best friend from their freikorps days. Unterscharfuher Braun lays a trap for the blood-traitors running the black-market ring.

After her schoolfriend Romy confides she is one-quarter Gyspy, Hilda wrestles with her national-socialist duty. Hans gets orders for the Eastern Front.

Surf Nazis Must Die on the beach: HitlerWatch.

The U-boat

Glee-schaltung

The Price is Reich.

Will and Race

V-e-r-y nice, Looch

Bottom of the 1st. *slips out*

Schweinfeld

Heil Street Blues

Hitlering the thread

Will and Race

WIN!

30 Rockets

Also, Hitler Knows Best

Also, too: Mussolini ha sempre ragione.

(The San Marino treat.)

Will and Race

Can only add a humble third- or fourthing to this.

Though I would like to know who Megan Mullally will be playing.

Next up on Channel V2…

Though I would like to know who Megan Mullally will be playing.

Winifred Wagner?

Blitzkreig Train

“Tanks, Ho!”

Krupp Magnolias

Doogie Howitzer

Though I would like to know who Megan Mullally will be playing.

Goebbels.

Chico and the Ubermensch

Welcome Back Hitler

Your Pogrom of Pogroms

My Three Aryan Sons. My Three Sonderkommandos.

Josef Mengele M.D.

Peenemunde Junction and the spin-off, Zyklon B Acres.

Various famous people compete at set tasks in order to shore up a hyper-inflating economy:

Weimar Celebrity, Get me outta here!

The Lebensraum Zone

Ruhr Valley Days.

Face the Fatherland.

The Vichy Chef.

Weimar Celebrity, Get me outta here!

I want to be a Millionaire! Billionaire! Gazillionaire! Googleplexaire .

Fuck it, I wanna buy an egg with money I can carry in my pocket.

But outside of that, at least IME, cocksucker is used as a pejorative that indicates that the accused is gay.

ho, ho! it is clear that you have not ever experienced swidgen

So, You Wanna Marry A Gauleiter?

Pimp My Panzer

Survivor: Stalingrad

You people! You know you’re just setting up Ben Shapiro’s next book!
Sesame Street—-SS!?!?!?

Drei’s Company
The zany adventures of two, lovable Jewish girls and their wacky male roommate after he ends up in the boxcar with them because everyone thinks he’s gay!
We’ll come and knock on your door
(We’ll come and knock on your door)
We’re just looking for Jews
(We’re just looking for Jews)
We’ll take her and her and him
Drei’s company Too!

Did I kill the thread? Was it my disrespect in tarnishing the hallowed memories of Janet, Chrissy, and Jack?

Goosestepping With The Stars

ohemgee, the hitler’s are making much lulz here! i only wish my brain were a little more clever…

The Kristallnacht Show

Heyoooooooooooooo.

Magnum, SS

Holocaust, She Wrote.

Throw Momma on the Train

Throw Momma on the Train

Oh, that’s inspired!

Triumph of the Will and Grace

The Mary Hitler Moore Show

Mengele Behaving Badly

Parks and Re-Education

Mengele Behaving Badly

Ha! Awesome.

The First they came for the Communists’ Wives Club

Luftwaffe Behind

Seinfeld

Life With Fatherland

True Crime Against Humanity

Göring My Way

Oops. “Seinfeld” was supposed to have a strikethrough. It worked in preview, it did!

Oooh! Just Gas Me.

Yeah, <s> works in preview, but you need <strike> to have it actually show up. FYWP.

Also, the show Less Than Perfect would have involved euthanasia vans.

Adolph Hitler and the Pencil of Doom

Thanks to all the little people. You know who you are.

Cattle Car 54 Where Are You?

The Dresden Fires

Arbeit Macht Frei Willy

Buffy the Hebrew Slayer

Leave It To Himmler

McHeil’s Fallschirmjagers

General Student’s mighty airborne assault on Crete has begun. But McHeil and his platoon of wacky misfit paratroopers mistakenly jump over the wrong Aegean island!

McHeil is flabbergasted upon discovering that Demetrios–the platoon’s unofficial cook, Creten collaborationist, and thick-as-a-brick untermensch–has jumped with the platoon! Hijinks and heil-arity are the orders of the day!

Deftly done, Hogeye. I larfed at all three.
MB: Yeah, I liked that one too.

I suppose we could go to the other side of the world for,

Nanking For A Day

but I don’t know if anyone’s ready to pass the Bataan just yet.

Busted

Not to mention the fact that the car depicted at her blog isn’t a Fury, it’s a ’64 Ford Falcon. No Plymouth Furies had single headlights.

No Plymouth Furies had single headlights.

Well, there was the ’76.

But yeah, you are correct sir. That’s a Falcon alright. I thought it looked funny. I couldn’t place why.

Goes to show, when they’re wrong about everything, they;re wrong about everything.

Do you think Shaidle has had plastic surgery?