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Four Feet Six Inches of Stupid (IMPORTANT UPDATE)
In what has to be the worst idea since lawn darts, the dim-witted Gay Patriots have decided to hold a contest to determine who is the “Grande [sic] Conservative Blogress Diva 2009.” There’s enough funny here to keep us busy until 2012, even leaving aside the faux-French “grande.” For instance, there is the accidentally revealing similarity of “blogress” and “ogress,” which seems particularly apt given the line-up of nominees, which includes Our Lady of the Shit Moat, Sister Hypochondria, Professor Wine Box, Old Mrs. Attila the Gun, Atlas Shrieks, Frau Eva Schlusselweiss, and Canada’s very own Four Feet Six Inches of Stupid. Not surprisingly, the whole idea of giving a prize to a woman has left the commenters at Gay Patriot a little, er, flaccid.
So, it’s up to us SadlyNauts to bring a little oomph to the Très Grande Conservative Ogress 2009 competition. And the best way to do that is to go over there and vote en masse for Kathy Shaidle, aka Five Feet of Fury Four Feet Six Inches of Stupid. The best reason for voting for Shaidle is that Bruce and Dan do not seem to have stumbled upon the delicious irony of Gay “Patriots” giving a best blogger award to a foreigner. That alone is reason to give the lavender, white and blue ribbon to Shaidle. But there’s more — the vile pint-sized racist is a raging homophobe too. Finally, having a bunch of liberal gay abortionists and closet jihadists tip the vote in her favor as a joke is just the ratfuckery that the award deserves, especially given the loathsome lineup of nominees offered by the Gay Patriots.
And just in case you needed one more reason to go vote for her, consider this recent post where she defends not having to back up racist comments when people ask her if she has any support for them:
“Do you have proof to back up that racist statement? Any studies? Any statistics??”
Of course not, you dickhead.
Unlike you, I didn’t waste the last good years of my life being brainwashed in academia; I lived with and worked with and talked with actual, normal human beings (professors definitely don’t count) and that’s how I formed my knowledge of how the world really works. Through the evidence of my senses and my own personal experiences.
I do not rely upon junk science or faux history or Marxist theory.
Most of these commenters and bloggers are clearly jealous of the simple fact that I’m smarter and more worldly than they are, that all their “education” and backpacking around the world actually made them dumber than I am — but they can’t admit that.
If that doesn’t make you want to vote for Shaidle (“Hate You Can Believe In”), then nothing will. Right now Sister Hypochondria and Atlas Shrieks are ahead. Go vote for Shaidle!
UPDATE: Shaidle has now pulled into the lead, but keep voting anyway, please! We want her to have a commanding lead in front of the rest so that they can’t catch up.
SECOND UPDATE: The Gay Patriots have demonstrated that Gay Patriots like to fix elections. They have stealthily and without explanation tried to remove Kathy Shaidle from the poll as it appears on their site. But, here’s a link to the poll where you can still vote for Kathy. The voting links in this post have also been fixed to direct you to that poll instead. Shame on you, Bruce and Dan! Let every vote count!!
THIRD AND FINAL UPDATE: Shaidle has been disqualified. Go here for details.
Arky said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:36
And that’s why she sticks an onion up her ass when she feels a head cold coming on.
Christ, is there any way we can encourage this person to run for office?
Arky the Lumberjack said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:39
Are we sure this isn’t K-Load in a blonde wig?
Rick Massimo said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:40
“I lived with and worked with and talked with actual, normal human beings …”
“Most of these commenters and bloggers are clearly jealous of the simple fact that I’m smarter and more worldly than they are, that all their “education” and backpacking around the world actually made them dumber than I am …”
She’s right, you know. It wasn’t easy backpacking all around the world without talking to another actual human being, but I managed it. Silly me – I could have interacted with some people, and then I’d be almost as smart as Shaidle.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:43
Alrighty, Clif.
Although I find it hard to avoid voting for the shrieking harpy, when I’m voting for gits and shiggles.
Matt said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:46
I gotta say, having never heard of this midget troglodyte before, my life is diminished now by being aware of her existence.
DJShay said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:48
Wow. Shaidle’s response is the conservative movement in a nutshell. “Vote for Stoopid!”
dbati said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:49
I’m with Matt. I am sorry for having clicked through, and know now that I will never get that 10 minutes of clicking around her site back.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 23, 2008 at 15:53
Damn, our whole country is diminished by her existence! Make her go away!
WereBear said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:06
It seems she hasn’t met normal human beings.
However, I would not urge her to get out more. Normal human beings wouldn’t want that.
dBa said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:11
Backpacking around the world makes you less worldly than those who haven’t backpacked around the world…
And…I’m ok with that.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:15
And Shaidle pulls pass the Malkintent™, 65 to 64…
Bill Rutherford, Princeton Admissions said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:22
Atlas Juggs with a clear lead at 161 votes. Slow down!
Bill Rutherford, Princeton Admissions said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:22
I mean, hurry up!
Fucking “you’re posting too quickly” message.
El Cid said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:23
Why are all these damn words floatin’ here on my damn screen? I got plenty far in life without having to rely on words like you people, I go with non-verbal, screaming impulses just fine. I do not rely upon junk lexicons and Marxist grammar. You think you’re so smart but all your talking and writing and thinking actually make you more dumb.
RvB said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:28
every professing heterosexual is have their future aggressively chopped at the roots.
And all your bases are belonging to me.
Jacob Singer said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:41
Ok, I voted. Now I need a shower.
Navvy said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:41
Canadian Cynic provides a greatest hits of KKKate as we fondly know her along with timely commentary on the rest of our convenient collection of mental midgets known as “The Blogging Tories”.
http://canadiancynic.blogspot.com
owlbear1 said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:42
It shows, Kathy. It really, really shows…
El Cid said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:45
I just talked to a bunch of people and they said there was no such thing as global warming and also we don’t need all these damn rocket ships and stuff to get to space we got all these airliners and they’re already about high enough in the sky and probably we just need to get pilots willing to fly into space and we’ll be there.
chocolatepie said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:47
Nothin’ like a poll written in Times New Roman with a 00FFFF aqua blue background to class up the design at that place.
I hope this woman has lots of kids that turn out to be gay, Prius drivers, liberal arts majors, or all of the above.
Dreamweasel said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:48
Whoops; too late. I think I voted for Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf.
dr. luba said,
December 23, 2008 at 16:56
I voted as directed, but Atlas Juggs is still ahead. Sadly, yes.
I also had a gander at her website–does anyone go there voluntarily rather than through SN trickery? And, really, no comments? Why is it that so many right wing loonies have either no comments or very strictly moderated ones? Must be their great love of free speech and the common man.
kc said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:05
actual, normal human beings (professors definitely don’t count)
I am appalled by this egregious slam of Professor Wine Box (ha!) and Instahack . . .
Navvy said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:07
dr. luba, hilariously, Shaidle is the Queen of Canada’s Speech Warriors and a leading harpie in their efforts to squash Canada’s Human Rights Commissions which rudely goes after them whenever they say nasty things about brown people. Mark Steyn is of course their fearless leader.
N.C. said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:14
Shaidle now has 180 votes to Juggs’ 167.
Hooray for Sadly, No! Tonguejack my pollbox!
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:18
Unlike you, I didn’t waste the last good years of my life being brainwashed in academia; I lived with and worked with and talked with actual, normal human beings (professors definitely don’t count) and that’s how I formed my knowledge of how the world really works. Through the evidence of my senses and my own personal experiences.
I’m not sure that her, errrrr, involvement with “actual normal human beings” was particularly fruitful.
Pardon the pun.
Legalize said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:19
I have asked around among real people who never have gone to those wastes of space (academia) and they told me that stupid people like the people who check your eyes (Marxists) are not necessary and that when your vision starts getting a little blurry, also, all you have to do is work harder as well and you’ll be fine.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:19
Seriously, what is it with North Americans (note the added “North”) that we somehow believe that inbreeding will make us smarter and better than people who look around the world to find solutions to problems that, you know, might not have occured in an echo chamber?
Girl from UNCLE said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:24
No comments are allowed on Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf’s (thanks Dreamweasel!) website.
Quelle suprise!
kc said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:28
Why do you belittle her by calling her “Four Feet Six Inches of Stupid?” If she says her circumference is five feet, who are we to dispute it . . .
Gerald Curl said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:29
I have a little Shaidle
I made it yell in hate
And when it’s drunk and angry
Then Shaidle I will bait
Shaidle, Shaidle, Shaidle…
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:35
Pollbox tonguejacked.
Seriously, there’s already three times as many comments over here as on that poll. I wonder how many of those voters are Naughties…
Raenelle said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:39
Shaidle leads now, with almost a quarter of the total vote.
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:39
Through the evidence of my senses and my own personal experiences.
That’s how I finally figured out that the Sun revolves around a flat earth, contra junk astrophysics and Marxist geometry.
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:40
I feel I’ve done my part to spread xmas cheer. Little Shaidle is ahead right now – 225 to the Anchoress’ 110.
Sporkey said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:41
I clicked over to her site. How terribly hilarious the un-pc names for neighborhoods was! *barf*
I’m four foot ten, and I drink tequila straight, and if she’s ever in my bar saying that shit, well, she’d find a bar stool lodged up her nose. But I’d be more interested in what the non-white people call the white neighborhoods. That would probably be funny.
“Five Feet of Fury”? Riiiiight. More like “Five Feet of Stupid”, seeing as how you’d have to dig that far to find her IQ. Facts are for
the little peoplethe liberals.fivefeetoffurry said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:41
As of 7:40 a.m Pacific Time, we’re up!
Which blogress should be the Grande Conservative Blogress Diva 2009?
Selection Votes
Amy Alkon 6% 50
The Anchoress 13% 110
Ann Althouse 6% 46
Little Miss Attila 1% 7
Tammy Bruce 4% 37
Dymphna of Gates of Vienna 0% 4
Sondra K of Knowledge is Power 3% 25
Mary Katharine Ham of The Weekly Standard 2% 14
Rachel Lucas 3% 23
Michelle Malkin 8% 65
neo-neo con 1% 10
Pundita 0% 2
Kathy Shaidle of Five Feet of Fury 27% 227
Pamela of Atlas Shrugs 20% 169
Debbie Schlussel 2% 19
Sister Toldjah 3% 21
829 votes total
kenga said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:47
Wait – who said lawn darts are a bad idea?
Good clean fun I say, and good for the gene pool.
You don’t even have to use ‘em on a lawn – just tack a sheet of plywood to the garage(I used a barn) wall, and throw them like you’re a softball pitcher.
And the damn kids’ll stay out of your yard voluntarily, no yelling or signs needed.
It’s quieter than skeet, too.
Doug Alder said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:49
Kathy Shaidle of Five Feet of Fury 26% 216
As of a few minutes ago she was in the lead
The Klute said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:51
Unrelated, but Dennis Prager just gave Sadly, No an early Holiday present.
npr said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:52
Wow. It’s like some mad scientist put Sarah Palin and a pig in a matter transporter and fucked up.
She’s got my vote, just cuz I’d hate to have to see A-Juggs’ celebratory music video.
Willy said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:55
Lawn darts are great! Ya gotta pay attention though, and that is where it fails with most people.
Those ubiquitous bean bag toss games suck mightily…where’s the challenge of imminent harm?
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:57
The racist statement that she is so proud of by the way is this one:
“the movie and television industries are pretty much run by Jews”
Jebus these people are boring. Vile, hateful and stupid yeah, but also mind numbing bores. The only new thing they’ve added to their list of people to hate is the gays… no, that’s not right, the Moooslims… no, they’ve always hated them too. No, their objects of hate never change. It’s like they are frozen, forever trapped in a gooey drop of amber bile.
Given the season I think I’ll pity them for now. Not that it will do any good.
aimai said,
December 23, 2008 at 17:57
Oh, come on. Click on the link to debbie schlussel. She’s gone right around the fucking bend with her attack on Obama for failing to host a star studded memorial for his grandmother every day of his vacation in hawaii, and also with her hand drawn fake Obama birth certificate. I mean, that’s a masterpiece of racism and moronic idiocy all at once. And say what you will, those two things don’t have to go together. They usually do, but man, this is naked.
aimai
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:00
Lawn darts are Charles “I got a list” Darwin’s game of tag, you’re it.
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:02
I’m not sure why Clif left out the pre-words leading up to the first block quote, which are:
How many arguments have I had on the web (Damian Penny’s comments section is particularly bad for this) with idiots who — after I’ve made a matter of fact, everybody-knows statement about the importance of preachers/barbershops/grandmothers/basketball/hair in Black culture, for instance — leap at the opportunity to engage in some moral exhibitionism… (emphasis added)
The pale Canadian midget’s claim of being down wit’ da hood is even funnier when one realizes that everything she “knows” about black people came from Hollywood movies (the tip-off was “barbershops”), which, earlier in the very same post, she quoted with approval the “factual statement” that Hollywood is run by Jews. Who, presumably, totally know from black folk.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:08
she quoted with approval the “factual statement” that Hollywood is run by Jews. Who, presumably, totally know from black folk.
Well, I mean, every Schwartz is a schvartze, after all, in Kathy’s world.
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:10
Not to mention that it’s a bit h-word for a tiny white Canadian lady who has just dropped some “common knowledge” about the importance of hair and grandmothers in black culture to complain about people who engage in “moral exhibitionism.”
Susan of Texas said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:10
Dymphna is my favorite. You gotta give it up for someone who named herself after a fake saint based on a fairy tale.
kenga said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:11
heh. “moral exhibitionism”.
That sounds like fun. If it weren’t so frickin’ cold out(8 deg F at 7AM in metro-Boston) I might be up for that later today.
There’s malls nearby, and it’s the holiday season.
What could possibly go wrong?
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:13
How many arguments have I had on the web (Damian Penny’s comments section is particularly bad for this) with idiots who — after I’ve made a matter of fact, everybody-knows statement about the importance of preachers/barbershops/grandmothers/basketball/hair in Black culture, for instance — leap at the opportunity to engage in some moral exhibitionism…
I spent a minute parsing this statement…OK, it was a wasted minute but what the heck…and I’m imagining the situation that created this:
KS: Come on! Everybody knows how important preachers/barbershops/grandmothers/basketball/hair is in Black culture!
DP’s comments section: Racist!
Some moral exhibitionism. Since when is calling a spade a spade, “moral exhibitionism”?
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:15
Sexy Shaidle what have you done
You made an ass of everyone
You made an ass of everyone
Sexy Shaidle what have you done
Sexy Shaidle you broke the rules
You blamed it all on the Jews
You blamed it all on the Jews
Sexy Shaidle oooh you broke the rules.
One wint’ry day the net was waiting for a lover
She came along to piss on everyone
Sexy Shaidle the greatest of them all.
Sexy Shaidle how did you know
The Jews and the fags control everything
The Jews and the fags control everything
Sexy Shaidle oooh how did you know.
Sexy Shaidle you’re five foot small
However big you think you are
However big you think you are
Sexy Shaidle oooh you’re five foot small.
We gave her every vote just to sit at her table
Just a snarl would lighten everything
Sexy Shaidle she’s the latest and the greatest of them all.
She made a fool of everyone
Sexy Shaidle.
However big you think you are
Sexy Shaidle.
MaryRC said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:16
Nice to see you’re giving a boost to a Canadian girl. Kathy could use one, too. She must be getting tired of having to fellate Mark Steyn.
Looking at that line-up above, I had a chilling thought. Remember that “Pretty in Mink” calendar of conservative women on ABC News a month ago? Can you imagine this crew posing in furs? Kathy or Pam in that Ann Coulter praying mantis pose? The Anchoress or Ann Althouse peeking cross-eyed over one bare shoulder like Mary Katherine Hamm? Wouldn’t that make you want to poke your eyes out?
Another thought: in what universe would the Anchoress and Pam Geller be running virtually neck-and-neck in the same contest? I couldn’t think of two stranger bed-fellows. Oh great, now I have to poke my eyes out again.
And I see my favourite conservative blogress, PUMA and birther “texasdarlin”, isn’t even on the list. Granted, texasdarlin doesn’t have much of a personality herself. But her site is such a fascinating peek into the world of the conspiracy theorist. It’s all there: projection, paranoia, circular reasoning, the willingness to embrace any theory, however wild, rather than give up your belief that Obama is a Kenyan/Indonesian usurper. I think she deserves a calendar of her own.
Office of President-Elect Backtrack Obama said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:16
This Shaidle woman seems the perfect replacement for Warren at the inauguration what with the sweet,sweet fag-hate.Shame she’s floridly racist AND Canadian…Oh well Warren it shall be then!
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:22
The approved quote about Jews running Hollywood comes from vdare.com. Can’t say I’m surprised that she hangs out there.
Still, one wonders at the amount of emotional labor one must exert to hate Jews AND Muslims. I suppose it must give her, in her own words, “the semi-satisfying sensation that [she's] engaged in something resembling work.“
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:25
Since when is calling a spade a spade, “moral exhibitionism”?
They really are just tired of holding it all in. All they really want to do is run down the street yelling “Ni**er, ni**er, ni**er, jewwww, ni**er, ni**er, ni**er.
People with Tourettes can sometimes suppress their tics for a short period but eventually they have to have some kind of release. I wonder if it isn’t something like that.
kenga said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:25
Y’know Rusty, maybe she could save time and just hate all followers of the book. Free up some CPU time for other pursuits, so to speak.
g said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:26
Do we get little stickers to put on after voting?
I voted!
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:32
Y’know Rusty, maybe she could save time and just hate all followers of the book.
That would certainly subvert the dominant paradigm, which is:
Christians: hated by all liberals
Jews: hated by some conservatives (militia/Ron Paul libertarian wing)
Muslims: hated by all conservatives
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:35
Sexy Shaidle what have you done
“Sexy”?
I threw up in my mouth, a little.
Joe Max said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:35
Cause I’m Kath Shaidle, yes I’m the real Shaidle
All you other Kath Shaidles are just imitating
So won’t the real Kath Shaidle please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?
Y’all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Bolton just burst in the door
and started whoopin her ass worse than before
they first were divorce, throwin her over furniture (Ahh!)
It’s the return of the… “Ah, wait, no way, you’re kidding,
he didn’t just say what I think he did, did he?”
And Dr. Althouse said… nothing you idiots!
Dr. Althouse’s dead, he’s locked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)
So, will the real Shaidle please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
and one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
Ha ha!
Guess there’s a Kath Shaidle in all of us!
Fuck it, let’s all stand up!
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:38
Here is her list of jobs she’s held in her life.
Woolworth’s cashier, promoted to office mgr
Candy counter at the Cineplex Odeon
Coat check, Holiday Inn
Admin assistant x 2
Production manager, Catholic New Times
Marketing something or other, Novalis Publishing
Web content editor, United Way
Web editor, The Shopping Channel
Freelance writer throughout
Wow, I’m so impressed. I worked at Wendy’s as a cashier and was promoted to shift manager once too. This gives me the right to tell all them th’ar elitist per’fessers with their fancy book larnin’ how little they understand the “real” world. Which anyone knows is controlled by the JEWS and the FAGS!!
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:40
Sorry about that actor212. I should have spent more time on that.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:50
Sorry about that actor212. I should have spent more time on that.
It’s OK, it reminded me that even as jaded as I am, there are still some things in this world that can make me emotional.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:50
these fine conservative lasses!
Chacon a son gout, Coachie.
jim said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:51
Shaidle now @ 356 … (F5) … er, 358 … (F5) … 378 to Pam Atlas @ 171. I’m hoping the #2 place gets 332 votes – because Shaidle’s 333rd vote was meeeee!
I’m jim, & I approve this ratfuck.
OT, NSFW & OMGWTFBBQ:
Something beautiful happens When Memes Collide … or when some infidel cyberterrorist decides to rewrite history. Reebok Akbar!
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:52
“Coat check at the Holiday Inn”?
Is that what they’re calling the “3 AM hooker in Des Moines that discounts for groups” these days?
Gary Ruppert said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:54
The fact is, I would like a post devoted to the one year anniversary of that powerful and persuasive masterpiece Liberal Fascism.
Loneoak said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:56
I’m totally stuck on the notion of moral exhibitionism–you can interpret that term in two wildly different and equally hilarious ways, like the duck-rabbit.
Moral Exhibitionism #1: Excuse me, Miss, I would like to show you my package. What’s that? No, I don’t mean what’s in the box, I mean my genitals. You see, I’m not wearing any pants under this trenchcoat and I would really enjoy displaying my genitals to you. Really?! Wow, that just makes my day. [Flashes] Thank you so much, have a Merry Christmas!
Moral Exhibitionism #2: LOOK AT MY MORALS, BEYOTCHES! Oh, yeah, you like that don’t you, you stupid sluts. My moral package is the biggest in town!
gbear said,
December 23, 2008 at 18:59
Swear to the deity of your choice that this is true: It was also about 8 deg this morning in St. Paul when I was heading in to work. While I’m waiting at a stop sign, some guy drives past me with no coat, shirt, or upper body clothing of any kind drives past and then pulls into a self-service gas station. I almost followed him just to get the rest of the story.
Noen at 18:15, unfortunately Lennon could have written those lyrics. He may have been a champion for women’s rights once he met Yoko, but everyone else was fair game for his scorn. ‘Baby you’re a rich fag jew’ indeed.
D.N. Nation said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:00
My favorite wingnut welfare moment of the year happened when Glenn Reynolds linked to a Tom Sowell column fawning over Liberal Fascism that was printed in the National Review. Triple wingnut score!
El Cid said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:03
noen: It sure took you a lot of words to prove that she knows more than you ’cause she worked with people and stuff.
Marion in Savannah said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:05
Just voted. Shaidle in first, with 410 votes. Runner-up is Atlas’ Jugs wtih 173.
DMcK said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:07
I like how we’re voting for Bestest Ogrely Bloghag Nutjob for 2009. Futuristic!
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:09
Extra bonus irony: GayPatriotWest, whose poll this is we’re ratfucking to give the victory to a woman who cold kicks it at Vdare, is Jewish.
commie atheist said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:11
Well, I mean, every Schwartz is a schvartze, after all, in Kathy’s world.
And every Cabbage a King!
commie atheist said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:20
Amy Alkon, hopeless romantic:
When I hear couples brag, “We just knew from the moment we saw each other!” I’m amazed that they think this is romantic, and not an announcement that they’re idiots. I always want to ask, “What, exactly, did you know? That she’s reasonably tall, attractive in a sort of bookish way, and you wanted to have sex with her?”
Of course, from the moment I saw Amy, I went, “Ewwwww!!!” so I guess we’re even.
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:24
“What, exactly, did you know? That she’s reasonably tall, attractive in a sort of bookish way, and you wanted to have sex with her?”
A good question for John McCain.
59lespaulcopy said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:25
Thankfully, workplace IT blocks her site, ’cause just those few sentences makes me wanna take a shower. Or several.
Ash Wing League said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:25
Is it me or are all of the nominated ‘divas’ homophobic? I guess it sort of makes sense considering who these guys are but still…
D.N. Nation said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:26
Yeah! Screw those idiots! How dare they say this!
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:33
When I hear couples brag, “We just knew from the moment we saw each other!” I’m amazed that they think this is romantic, and not an announcement that they’re idiots. I always want to ask, “What, exactly, did you know? That she’s reasonably tall, attractive in a sort of bookish way, and you wanted to have sex with her?”
No, dickhead, it means that they wanted to have sex with each other forever.
Now, I realize longevity is a concept lost on a self-professed street-walker…
commie atheist said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:33
This is fun. Ann Shithouse:
I’d say this is great news for Cheney. Only 23%. Because it’s not as though most Americans have a whole list of ex-Vice Presidents to call to mind at a moment’s notice. Most everyone knows Cheney. And then who? Were they tested on the depth of their knowledge? Maybe they remembered Al Gore, and also George H.W. Bush. And yet only 23% put Cheney last. I’d say that’s a big pat on the back for Dick.
Of course, when you read the actual story, you get this:
An additional 41 percent feel that Cheney is a poor vice president, with 34 percent rating him a good number two.
And the kicker:
Only one percent of those polled say that Cheney is the best vice president in U.S. history.
If I had time I’d click on the other links and find something stupid within the first few posts for each, but I think you get the drift: these are some stupid, stupid people.
commie atheist said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:35
Oops – that would make more sense if I included the title to her post:
CNN poll finds that 23% of Americans think Dick Cheney is the worst Vice President of all time.
dickhead said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:37
I’m really not as bad as everyone makes me out to be.
comsympinko said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:40
One of the most profound regrets of my life is not being able to practice ophthalmic medicine in the age of lawn darts.
A time when men were men and a prosthetic eye was just a consequence of poor aim.
kenga said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:47
By Dionysus, I swear that the thermometer outside the back door(one of those cheap plastic dial thingamabobs) told me it was 8 deg F at 7AM this morning.
litbrit said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:50
Ratfucking completed. Like some of the others, I hadn’t heard of the woman before today, but I happily put aside my normal due-diligence standards in service of the Greater Good.
fadgeophile said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:54
Now that is some high-grade funny.
Really. What would I do without greater wingnuttia at which to laugh?
Amy Alkon said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:55
No, dickhead, it means that they wanted to have sex with each other forever.
My dick is right where it belongs, thanks.
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:55
A time when men were men and a prosthetic eye was just a consequence of poor aim.
Speaking of putting somebody’s eye out:
http://www.fivefeetoffury.com/:entry:fivefeet-2008-12-21-0001/
Snorghagen said,
December 23, 2008 at 19:59
I lived with and worked with and talked with actual, normal human beings…
Actual, normal human beings. Yick. Those fuckers creep me out.
kenga said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:02
I’d have figured those repair jobs were usually left to a Mortician.
I mean, if you’re trying, it’s going to take out a lot more than just an eye.
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:05
“Of course not, you dickhead” could become the new “bookmark this, liberals.”
kenga said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:08
Oh!
I was thinking it should involve one of those red pots on the tripod near the exits. And a bell.
tigrismus said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:15
I do not rely upon junk science or faux history or Marxist theory.
Random, context-free anecdotes are the best way to determine reality.
g said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:16
Can we give them all awards, you know, to help their self-esteem?
El Cid said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:20
A remarkably low percentage of people name the bubonic plague as the worst disease ever*, so this is in its own way an endorsement of the bubonic plague, and quite surprisingly to me.
*According to data from people I talk to and stuff, not the fancy word-using types
roseyv said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:24
“One of the most profound regrets of my life is not being able to practice ophthalmic medicine in the age of lawn darts.”
Cheer up, it’s not like you’ve entirely missed your window. An acquaintance of mine, whose father is an eye surgeon, once lamented: “he’s never spent an entire July 4th at home in my lifetime.”
The Goddamn Batman Fought The Blogress To A Draw On Top Of A Giant Typewriter said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:26
No write in votes for Adam “Two Hundred Kilos Of Lard In A One Hundred Kilo Sack” Yoshida? Folks, I’m officially dismayed.
tigrismus said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:29
Ah, Rusty, that link is classic: little miss “I didn’t waste the good years of MY life being brainwashed in academia” denounces the town she grew up in as “a crappy place full of anti-intellectual slobs.” Living, working, and talking with these common clay of the new west types during her formative years was obviously where she actually got most of her “knowledge of how the world really works.”
noen said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:30
That’s a good idea g, SN should have an end of the year award show. The Westminister Wingnut Show. I vote the Pantload for best of show but Amy has good confirmation and strong lines. I’d give her an honorable mention.
(: Tom :) said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:30
Gerald Curl said, December 23, 2008 at 17:29
I have a little Shaidle
I made it yell in hate
And when it’s drunk and angry
Then Shaidle I will bait
Shaidle, Shaidle, Shaidle…
(Cartman)
Shrews – make stupid claims!
Shrews – that’s why they’re lame
(Stan)
I will try to match her spin
I made sense, I’ll try again
(Mr. Brazlovski)
Sadly, No! I love you!
You’re so hot on your blog
Everybody now!
There Are Some Questions Which The World's Greatest Detective Is In No Goddamn Hurry To Have Answered... said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:32
…such as this one from Professor W.B.
slimslowslider said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:32
i nominate justanamericancindy4 from Rosettasister’s blog.
D.N. Nation said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:34
From the lovely Ms. Althouse:
You dummy, they weren’t stacking him up against other individual VPs, they were taking stock of the general statement. Why even attempt to defend this?
fadgeophile said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:35
Anyone catch these modifications of the old ‘Cathy’ cartoon?
The Goddamn Batman spends too much free time with Robin, Boy Wonder said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:35
“Blogress” being key. Adam in a Mu?umu?u is a little frightening to me.
commie atheist said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:36
I don’t know about you, but I really want to see Glenn Reynolds and Michelle Malkin interview Michael Steele and “Joe the Plumber,” right after I watch Dr. Helen turn the tide of radical feminism by interviewing men’s rights advocate Dr. Glenn Sacks…
…right after I take this cyanide pill.
mikey said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:38
No, wait, this is some valuable data.
I didn’t realize that I could simply designate any statement I make as a statement of fact and from thence forward it may not be questioned, nor do I ever have to provide evidence to support my claim. Merely the act of stating certifies the, uh, factualness of the statement.
Ready? Here we go:
I have Zinc Buttocks.
And no Junk Science can prove that I don’t, Dickheads…
mikey
fadgeophile said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:41
NO!
NOT HTE BUTTOCKS!!!1!
N.C. said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:45
Are The Buttocks the Jews of liberal ass-ism?
PeeJ said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:45
What a pleasure to sleep in then find S,N! engaged in a most excellent ratfuck. Merry Xmas!
Update: Seven feet of diarrhea in a five foot bag is way ahead.
commie atheist said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:46
Miss Atilla responds:
Are campaigning for Kathy Shaidle in the Conservative Blogress Diva Contest over at Gay Patriot. They’ve give us all little punny names that are supposed to insult us; I’m “Old Mrs. Attila the Gun,” which makes me sound kinda married, yet spinster-like, at the same time. I rather like it.
But it isn’t just any gun, Guys: it’s a Ruger .357; I love the way they put their wheelguns together. I like Smiths, but I love Rugers.
I’ve decided to put the rest of my weight behind The Anchoress—such as it is. Apparently certain swaths of the Loony Left have decided that a woman’s mass correlates with the force of her ideas. Laugh if you like, but have you come up with any novel systems lately for estimating a woman’s intelligence or rhetorical force? I thought not. (WTF?!?)
Why not? I get that all the time. Mostly it’s from muddy-headed lesbians, but sometimes it comes from straight women. It’s as if they are so tired of male condescension that they must have someone to talk down to, and The Short Chick is it. Oh, and men also pull this crap: a few males like to act as if there is something childlike about a small woman. (Also: medium-sized women, and tall women.) I barely notice that any more, though.
So go to Gay Patriot and make your feelings known; fill in the ballot for Kathy Shaidle, too, if you like: after what their Human Rights Commission has put the Northern Blogosphere through, I’d love to see this award go to a Canadian.
tigrismus said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:47
I have Zinc Buttocks.
And no Junk Science can prove that I don’t, Dickheads…
My muriatic acid Erlenmeyer bidet says otherwise.
Vice Admiral Marget the Omnipresent Dock Labourer said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:47
I was going to try to find a picture of Shaidle standing so I could try some idiotic animated GIF, but the image search is really really creepy.
http://images.google.com/images?q=Kathy%20Shaidle&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&sa=N&tab=wi
commie atheist said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:49
Nice. Prussian Blue right next to Obama/Wright.
MzNicky said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:52
Actual, normal human beings. Yick. Those fuckers creep me out.
Snorghagen has put his finger on it. Thank you sir!
The Goddamn Batman Proffers A Postscript said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:55
By the way, I’m not sure that FFSIOS counts as The World’s Shortest Racist, since on one of the few occasions that I’ve caught the Jerry Springer Show, they had on a midget Klan member. But she tries harder.
Snorghagen said,
December 23, 2008 at 20:58
Shaidle is not only way ahead – she’s close to an outright majority. This is a triumph for small, strange, reactionary women everywhere!
Anonymous said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:01
kc:
We dispute it because we are the ones who care about girth. Girth is much more important than length – er, I mean height. Ask anyone!
.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:02
Pammy is going to have to try bikini-blogging in December to pull this one out.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:04
Dammit, RB, you broke the blog again.
Simba B said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:04
—
Xayywechkle Fining the Precious Dramaturg said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:04
Pundita sez:
Here is the whole of the Pundita essay:
Simba B said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:07
Xayywechkle Fining the Precious Dramaturg said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:04
You know, RB, change that last g to a d, and it gives me an idea—use insult nouns.
Turbine Yukon Palin said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:07
What a repulsive little hatebag. She and Malkin are like some bookends of evil. Bleah.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:08
You
dummydickhead, they weren’t stacking him up against other individual VPs, they were taking stock of the general statement. Why even attempt to defend this?Fixed your post for meme-ability.
Snorghagen said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:13
T. S. Eliot just wishes he could poetify like that.
Righteous Bubba said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:15
Pundita link for dramaturdical verismellitude:
http://pundita.blogspot.com/2008/12/thanks-to-gay-patriot-and-watcher-of.html
Djur said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:16
After I was first introduced to that particular line (in its “rich fat” incarnation) I listened to the coda of that song many, many times. And I could never convince myself that the line was anything other than “Baby you’re a rich man too.”
DrDick said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:18
It is with great pleasure that I cast my vote for this diminutive ultrarefined distillation of hateful putrescence as the epitome of rightard femblogging. Must note that she is not merely trouncing the competition, she is plowing them under and sowing the earth with salt.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:22
T. S. Eliot just wishes he could poetify like that.
I would like to add my dignitude to the sediment.
The Reality-Based Dave said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:25
Keep voting! We’re only a little bit ahead.
Shelly- 69 – 5% (thinking about that number & Shelly at the same time made me throw up a little bit in my mouth)
Anchoress- 118 – 9%
Spammy- 178 – 14%
Shaidle- 667 – 51%
All others are below 5%.
HA!
jim said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:30
Uh … I don’t know if anyone’s pointed this out yet, but it looks to me like you can vote more then once.
I think you know what to do here, folks.
Ain’t democracy grand?
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:33
It is with great pleasure that I cast my vote for this diminutive ultrarefined distillation of hateful putrescence as the epitome of rightard femblogging. Must note that she is not merely trouncing the competition, she is plowing them under and sowing the earth with salt.
Mr Chairman!
The grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat state of New York, home of the Macintosh apple, the fine wineries of the Hudson valley, the Long Island potato, the Empire State Building and the birthplace of that grrrrrrrrrrrrrreat liberal Democrat, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, casts its votes for Katie Shaidle!
Chris Moorehead said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:46
It would appear that you’ve finally found a mate for Adam Yoshida. Can you imagine the offspring of such a union?
fadgeophile said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:50
Yep. you can vote as many times as you wish.
I do enjoy a good, old fashioned rat-fucking!
David in NYC said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:54
Not surprisingly, the whole idea of giving a prize to a woman has left the commenters at Gay Patriot a little, er, flaccid.
From the Gay Patriot his own self, (comment #6 on the voting page):
Gotta give it to you, Clif: you do know your wingnuts.
BTW, 5FoF is now at 51% (thanks, no doubt, to Sadly, No!).
M. Bouffant said,
December 23, 2008 at 21:59
Now at 53%!!!
mikey said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:12
May God bless the Americans who’ve stood shoulder to shoulder with them
Um, were our guys standing shoulder to shoulder with the iraqis while we were bombing baghdad, or did that only come after we occupied their country, deposed their government, disbanded their armed forces and imprisoned tens of thousands of them?
‘Cause while god’s diggin it, I’m pretty sure many iraqis are more than a little pissed off…
mikey
Mr. Todd said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:13
ahaha. man, this is really hard to parody. at the end of her post she makes reference to playing “the ‘studies & statistics’ card”.
pretty soon people will be playing the ‘evidence card’. communists.
HumboldtBlue said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:19
This poor woman has some serious and unresolved issues … to whit
I loved my mother (my dying-at-the-same-time grandmother? Not so much. Sorry. Hey, you didn’t know her. Shut up. She gave Christmas presents she’d rescued from the apartment garbage room, ok? There’s “Scottish” and then there’s obnoxious) but I hated every minute I spent in Hamilton away from my “real” life. Why wouldn’t I?
That’s during a discussion of It’s A Wonderful Life
And here I thought I was a sad sack loser.
pch1013 said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:20
Oh my. She praises Steve Sailer. Steve fucking Sailer.
Vic said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:26
Are we sure someone’s not going to throw a tantrum and demand a superficial popularity contest award for male bloggers only? “End affirmative action!”
M. Bouffant said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:39
Found a poem of Five Feet of Fuckface’s.
“Contacts with Trotskyites”
Via the Google image list someone above linked to. Thanks!!
M. Bouffant said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:43
VADM Marget’s list, to give credit where it’s due.
Matt said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:43
I have a soft spot for all of the esteemed blogresses. Indeed, knowing that they exist, that spot may never be hard again.
Oh look! Porn! I’m saved!
Arky4That1 said,
December 23, 2008 at 22:56
Awesome. Maybe he’ll step in and take The Littlest DerAngel’s crown or dozen roses or battery operated device or whatever the prize is, spurring a Force Five tornado of H8.
M. Bouffant said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:00
‘Twould appear that there’d be about 50 to 60 votes there if Naughties hadn’t been to visit.
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:09
I voted for 5′ in the poll, but all things being equal I would have really voted for Schlussel. She has a post up about how Obama has his picture taken shirtless to appease the gays who are upset about Rick Warren. That’s top-shelf batshit right there.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:16
Are we sure someone’s not going to throw a tantrum and demand a superficial popularity contest award for male bloggers only? “End affirmative action!”
Knock yourself out. I’ll chime in later.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:17
‘Twould appear that there’d be about 50 to 60 votes there if Naughties hadn’t been to visit.
Oh great. Now GayPatriot is going to think he’s all that. It’s going to take at least four posts of him in that shitty T shirt of his to knock him back to earth.
Sirius Lunacy said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:32
Iiiichhh! I went and looked at the Pretty in Mink photos and found that my main Manne Coulter turned out to be the most femunine of the bunch. I’m sure I saw some of them in the final scene of The Bird Cage.
M. Bouffant said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:38
Yes, they did a good job of “spackling the hag” on Ms. Coulter.
DrDick said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:52
Heh. Just went and voted again. At 53%, followed (distantly) by Coultergeist at 12% and The Nunnery at8%. We have a blowout. La Wankita has gone nuclear and vaporized the opposition.
actor212 said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:53
“spackling the hag” on Ms. Coulter.
*making notes*
That’s a keeper.
The Reality-Based Dave said,
December 23, 2008 at 23:55
The Sadly-Naughts are making a difference!
Shaidle – 828 – 55%
Spamela- 185 – 12%
Anchoress- 122 – 8%
Everyone else is less than 100 votes…
HA-ha!
Ben said,
December 24, 2008 at 0:47
The good news is that the bilious munchkin is far and away in the lead. The bad news is that GP is placing some nasty tracking cookie on the poll. They might throw out all her liberal-tainted votes.
pch1013 said,
December 24, 2008 at 0:50
G-d forbid we should queer the vote or anything.
Arky4That1 said,
December 24, 2008 at 1:17
Win.
mikey said,
December 24, 2008 at 1:26
What, there’s some kind of rule that when you vote you have to “mean it”?
Shit, don’t tell Norm Coleman….
mikey
Stag Party Palin said,
December 24, 2008 at 1:29
I think she would have more votes with a better nickname, like ‘Five feet of finger food.’
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 1:45
“Five feet of Furry”
dangerblond said,
December 24, 2008 at 1:55
OMG. Like some commentors above, I was blissfully unaware of this nauseating bigot until I clicked through. Yikes! Like Sporkey, I was particularly floored by the very unfunny neighborhood names. 5 feet of fury is right – this woman is mad at the world, and there is nothing we can do to make it up to her.
jim said,
December 24, 2008 at 2:11
Hmm, clearing out my cookies didn’t work.
But, AHEM.
If you nuke your cookies while using a modem that switches IPs, & you just copy-&-paste the link location into a new window, I believe your diabolical subversion of their reindeer games is pretty much untrackable – let alone if you’re also surfing Teh Intarwebz behind a proxy.
I’m just sayin’.
Another Kiwi said,
December 24, 2008 at 2:28
3 inches of brain stem.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 2:30
“unterminated” brain stem
mikey said,
December 24, 2008 at 2:35
Undifferentiated protoplasm…
mikey
lesserdevil said,
December 24, 2008 at 2:44
We’re talking about a stupid so profound it sucks in intelligence from minds across a broad spectrum and actually converts it into antimatter. This is an ignorance so overwhelming that not even the spelling of simple words can exist in the same place with it. Combine that with some of the raunchiest cases of vaginal self abuse, caused by the utter lack of any attractive qualities about the women housing the disturbingly fetid cavities, and you wind up with an entity so hideous it’s impossible for its physical manifestation to be viewed without nausea, headaches, vomiting, internal bleeding, black outs and/or unconsciousness, or any combination of the aforementioned. These “women” have “fans,” animals similar to those monkey creatures from the Wizard of Oz except without any of the redeeming qualities, and for those people this description of their idols needs summarization:
Ignorant bitches with nasty twats, highly toxic halitosis, beady yellow eyes and sagging foot long breast tubes.
Mike in Teh Heart.....Shoulderland said,
December 24, 2008 at 2:57
Latest update :
Amy Alkon 4% 67
The Anchoress 8% 131
Ann Althouse 3% 52
Little Miss Attila 1% 9
Tammy Bruce 2% 41
Dymphna of Gates of Vienna 0% 4
Sondra K of Knowledge is Power 2% 28
Mary Katharine Ham of The Weekly Standard 1% 17
Rachel Lucas 2% 27
Michelle Malkin 4% 72
neo-neo con 1% 12
Pundita 0% 2
Kathy Shaidle of Five Feet of Fury 58% 986 LOL!
Pamela of Atlas Shrugs 11% 192
Debbie Schlussel 1% 24
Sister Toldjah 2% 28
mikey said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:18
Feel the Power of teh Sadly…
mikey
Another Kiwi said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:23
Nobody expects teh Sadly
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:24
OK, folks, now we’ve got PZ’s attention. …Should be fun.
Marsupial said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:24
Wow — someone named ‘Pundita’ has a whopping 2 votes! Maybe she needs to campaign a bit.
Simba B said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:30
Attention Mgmt—
Have we not dealt with someone or some group leaving comments here and then linking back to them from right wing blogs and the like saying, “lookit those evil liberals”? Well, this looks like such an attempt.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:33
good dawg, ckc, be careful! that might bring Cigar Skunk back!!
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:34
…I think the wingnuts would say “lookit those evil liberals” regardless of whether the quote was a ratfuck or not, and their followers are too dense to deal with context anyway.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:35
I’d take Cigar Skunk over the Truth(sic) any day.
Max said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:44
Oh dear, looks like they’re onto us – they’ve removed Shaidle from the lineup, silently. Gone from the actual options, but still listed in the links to where they’re all from below…
Anonymous said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:45
Five Feet of Futile Posturing: “people…trying…not to notice…that Asians and natives can’t handle their booze as well as Caucasians and Blacks. If you just accept this stuff, life is so much easier and less stressful.”
She’s right. I’ve got to stop staying awake nights fretting about the level of alcohol tolerance among indigenous Americans.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:47
Well, maybe we should move on to another one – with the help of PZ’s minions we could force them to remove the choices one by one.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:50
I vote for Amy Alkon (for old times sake!)
ignatov said,
December 24, 2008 at 3:59
Five Feet of Faulty: “If you just accept…that Asians and natives can’t handle their booze as well as Caucasians and Blacks…life is so much easier and less stressful.”
I must stop lying awake nights fretting about the level of alcohol tolerance among indigenous Americans.
pch1013 said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:15
Simba/ckc — in right-wing (specifically LGF) circles, they refer to that sort of poster as a “moby.” Apparently because Moby (the bald techno music dude) once encouraged his readers to post fake inflammatory posts on right-wing blogs.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:21
…over at Pharyngula commenter garble has kindly left us a link to allow us to continue to express our hope that FFoF will be the Blogress of choice. (wasn’t able to put it in a link – probably better cut and pasted anyway. – hope someone saves some screenshots of the tallies as they get close to “election day”)
http://poll.pollcode.com/exN2
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:21
(ooh – looky there! it linked all by its lonesome!!!)
Stag Party Palin said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:24
Apparently the Joyeuse Chauviniste has declared Five Feet of Felch Queen the winner by taking her it off the poll. No way there are enough gay conservatives to catch her now.
Stag Party Palin said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:25
FYWP. Non-union I guess, since it wouldn’t let me strike.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:31
…hooray, I’m Moose Roadster Palin (my mother will be SO proud!)
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:32
(if you think that post is oblique – go up one to the Joyeux whatever one)
Nentuaby said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:43
Our efforts appear to have bombed her straight off the roll call. I can’t help feeling that at least partly reaches our goal. (Greetings from Pharyngula, by the by.)
Steerpike said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:48
I think we have defined “The opposite of Viagraa’. Or possibly that should be the “antidote”.
“If you exprerience an erection lasting more than four hours, contact your doctor immediately…or just click this link…”
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:49
…perhaps Clif could add garble’s bypass link to the full ballot as an update.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:51
(which he probably did while I wasn’t looking…aargh)
Clif said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:58
I did.
p.a. said,
December 24, 2008 at 4:59
is that quote for real??!! wow.
ckc (not kc) said,
December 24, 2008 at 5:36
…slightly OT – prompted by a commenter at the poll whose choice was “Dymphna of GoV”. St Dymphna is:
…the patron saint of those who suffer from mental illnesses and nervous system disorders, epileptics, mental health professionals, happy families, incest victims, and runaways.
…man, those saints sure do know how to multi-task!!
elvi said,
December 24, 2008 at 7:45
Five Feet of Faulty: “If you just accept…that Asians and natives can’t handle their booze as well as Caucasians and Blacks…life is so much easier and less stressful.”
I guess not having “backpacked around the world” means she never tossed a few dozen back with any White folk in England or N. Europe and then beat the shit out of each other over a footie match. Puke. Repeat.
sarah said,
December 24, 2008 at 12:09
wow, m. bouffant. thank you(?) for the link to the poem. here’s the important part, for those of you not in the mood to read it:
wow. just wow.
kiki said,
December 24, 2008 at 13:02
Her book (signed by Mark Steyn!) is called The Tyranny of Nice. Presumably she just fed ‘Liberal Fascism’ into some kind of thesaurus script for the title; wonder if she did the same for the content?
The Tyranny of Nice. Jesus Rock-’Em-Sock-’Em-Robots-playing Christ on a fucking rubber crutch, these people are stupid.
Lex (Agent of Chaos) Azagthoth said,
December 24, 2008 at 13:13
Dymphna is the patron saint of the mentally ill, that oughta tell you enough….LOL…..so do we vote for these for their blogging or for Hillary’s Senate seat?
Mrs Tilton said,
December 24, 2008 at 14:00
Shame on you, Bruce and Dan! Let every vote count!!
No, you just don’t get it. Disenfranchisement, like marriage discrimination, is a trivial abridgement of liberty compared to, say, a small increase in the capital gains tax.
Mrs Tilton said,
December 24, 2008 at 14:04
And may I just add that the Goddamn Batman’s comments have once again made me soil me trews with wholesome laughter; though of course his/her nyms alone are usually enough to do that.
Walt said,
December 24, 2008 at 14:19
sadly though, the little attention whore will just add her election to the “i’m persecuted for my beliefs” file.
What vileness.
Mr. Todd said,
December 24, 2008 at 15:05
its letting me vote for her more than once, i’m totally acorning this shit.
kevvyd said,
December 24, 2008 at 15:29
Ah yes, Five Feet of Unfuckable Hag. Vileness, indeed.
luko said,
December 24, 2008 at 15:32
lol she’s winning by a landslide.
writzer said,
December 24, 2008 at 15:54
Sadly, she’s withdrawn from the pageant.
actor212 said,
December 24, 2008 at 16:37
Bruce and Dan are dickheads.
npr said,
December 24, 2008 at 17:24
So the fix is in.
I like this comment from the GP:
…..All of our nominees are fab, but I have soft spot for Pam
Yeah, she makes me go flaccid, too.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
December 24, 2008 at 18:35
Walt, people who hold views like those SHOULD be persecuted.
Vile indeed.
Vain said,
December 24, 2008 at 20:43
So is it just me, or all our the glorious nominees all single women? Coulter, K-Lo too.
No family to speak of, no husband, goddamn those conservative values!
actor212 said,
December 26, 2008 at 0:37
So is it just me, or all our the glorious nominees all single women?
Pammy’s divorced. At least she managed to rope some sap into providing genetic material under the cloak of legitimacy…
Bina said,
December 31, 2008 at 9:50
On behalf of all Canadians, I humbly apologize for Ms. Five Feet (on a good day) of Fuckhead. She is our greatest national shame, after the current band of Conservative squatters on Parliament Hill.
A Wikileaks Supporter said,
December 11, 2010 at 3:03
This whole Wikileaks fiasco is pretty crazy. You should check out http://voteonwikileaks.com. It’s a recently launched website that seems to be going viral. They got something like 50,000 visitors in the first 24 hours of launch. It’s sort of like a crowdsourced collection of arguments against and for Wikileaks. As a blog owner, you’d probably find some of the opinions there a good read.