When the feds who caught guys up like this were working for Dubya, it was a triumph. Now, it’s traitorous.

I think you gotta give Hoft credit for his eye-popping banner.

I can see Mogadishu from my sink.

But Sadly, No!’s complaints also apply to the “official media” story in the Oregonian.

http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/11/fbi_thwarts_terrorist_bombing.html

Flashy headline, check

Same images in same context, check

“18 minutes” in prominent position in story, check

Note that the failure to detonate was due to a long-term FBI operation buried in story, check

Incendiary, anti-Muslim comments in comments section, check

From the middle, we notice that haters gotta hate. We notice you are one of them. We wonder whether you are going to figure this out, or just marinate in it.

concern troll is concerned

nice nick tho

Marinate.

“18 minutes” in prominent position in story, check

The prominent position being right under the paragraph that said it was a dummy bomb.

This, this is absolute proof we need to tighten airport security. And watch all musselmen, and outlaw sharia law and also colored negroes. And wax our legs so we get those beautiful slick highlights down our shinbones, accentuating slim, blade-like ankles and narrow feet decanted into sharp-toed red patent pumps with stratospheric heels. There’s nothing quite like legs so smooth they seem wet. God, I just want to rub mayonnaise all over myself.

Sorry, what?

Clearly anyone having anything to do with Christmas needs some extra ball or boob squeezing.

@undertoad. I didn’t say Hoft was the only stupid person in the world, just that he was one of them. That may be a hard distinction for you to grasp, but I suppose you’ll explain that by pointing out that there are other stupid people besides yourself.

tighten airport security

Did he have the fake bomb in his ass?

I loved the Gutter Stinch Who Stole Christmas, though.

theage.com.au first paragraph pretty succinct:

Teen arrested after US car bomb plot thwarted

A SOMALI-BORN teenager plotted to carry out a car bomb attack at a crowded Christmas tree lighting ceremony in central Portland yesterday, but the bomb turned out to be a dud supplied by undercover agents as part of a sting, federal prosecutors said.

Undertoad, just to be serious for a moment, using all the power of will I possess, I’d simply point out that this is a left-wing blog mostly aimed at ridiculing the fever swamps of the extreme right. We all know the commercial media will pick the story up and run with it in similar fashion. The fun is in seeing how the whackaloons will handle it. It’s kind of like when train enthusiasts get together and excitedly discuss how the Atchison, Topeka & Santa Fe No. 1010 Baldwin 1901 2-6-2 is famous for pulling the 1905 Death Valley Scotty Special to its record-breaking run, at speeds not beaten until the 1936 Super Chief was introduced into service. Some might say these train enthusiasts are incredibly dull halfwits who went wrong as children and ended up wanting to wear mattress ticking overalls their whole lives. Others might say they’re harmless hobbyists helping to keep an important part of our collective heritage alive by caring for these massive machines that helped bind a sprawling continent together. We here at Sadly, No are not interested in trains, unless they are freighted with mangoes.

I think that explains it.

200 SOMALIAS were seen crossing the boarder?!? WON’T SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING? WE’RE LETTING ENTIRE COUNTRIES IN! HUNDREDS OF THEM!

And that poor boarder. Pobrecito.

Your favorite train SUCKS!!!!

detonate a brick of Play-Doh.

WON’T SOMEONE THINK OF MR. BILL?!

oooooooooooohhhh
noooooooooooooo

All you liberals…and your OPINIONS…and your SNARK. You should be more like undertoad. You know, dumb and humorless.

Furthermore, I don’t like to marinate; I like to brine. It makes me more tender and juicy.

I like to brine.

So…I should spit on you?

Meanwhile, it’s the 21st Century, why don’t these guys have a web store?

vs is a hater
vs is s hater
vs is a hater
nyah nyah nyah nyah nyha nyah

Many supplies for those of the shambling persuasion; fear in a can to make my job easier.

We wonder whether you are going to figure this out, or just marinate in it.

You’re soaking in it.

We have a lot of Somalians around here. Generally they are peaceful and everyone gets along just fine. We did have a 16 year old Somalian kid arrested this past summer for terrorist threats, or a plot, I forget. I see the Somalian women on the bus all the time. I just love the fabrics they wear. Very beautiful.

I like seeing the FBI actually doing it’s job and *preventing* violence. The wingnuts seem almost disappointed. They’s love nothing better than for this idiot to have succeeded. Then they could scream for Obamar’s impeachment.

Meanwhile, it’s the 21st Century, why don’t these guys have a web store?

Oh, my god! I love ‘vague sense of unease’! I always wondered where that came from!

This comment thread needs a liberal who will cry “Entrapment!” just to justify the further existence of all the Wingnut fears. So here goes:

The FBI makes these kind of incidents just so Winger blogs and comments will look stupid.

“So…I should spit on you?”

At least buy me a drink before we get to the kinky stuff.

You’re soaking in it.

this made me laff, cuz for no odd reason (as my daughter says), this phrase has recently made a reappearance in my vocabulary…

They shoulda had those cans of fear instead of the Terror Alert color code.

At least buy me a drink before we get to the kinky stuff.

I bet you say that to all the TSA agents.

“You’re soaking in it.”

So it’s the HATE that made my hands so soft!!

Hence, the saying:

Soft hands, hard heart.

“I bet you say that to all the TSA agents”

I didn’t get searched ONCE during my turkey day trip. 🙁

Soft hands, hard heart.

you know who else had soft hands and a hard heart?

you know who else had soft hands and a hard heart?

The Venus de Milo?

The Oregonian on-line headline:
FBI thwarts terrorist bombing attempt at Portland holiday tree lighting

We’re pretty mellow ’round here. He’ll, we could have used the excitement.

I didn’t get searched ONCE during my turkey day trip. 🙁

perhaps you shouldn’t have worn your I OPT OUT maternity top?

Pantload?

I OPT OUT maternity top?

The best selling part of the “Just Say Yes” collection.

Oregon Public Broadcasting is also leading with and playing up the “no immanent danger” aspect. OTOH NPR inflicted Ari Shapiro’s singing on us this morning, aaiiiyeeee!

I use steel wool and a bleach solution on the dishes.

Peeple, it’s the war on freaking Christmas! Somalis are skateboarding into ‘Merica and you do nothing!!!

Immanent. Oh well. I’m still in bed.

“Male Silverback”

Known to do tag-team commenting work with “Male Rooster.”

@vacuumslayer
“At least buy me a drink before we get to the kinky stuff”.

It’s usual for the sub to buy the dom a six-pack of beer to fuel the evening’s water sports. Madge brings her own..

The fact is, you have been outed as the lefty haters you are, youve got nothing contructive but hating USA and partiots, as well as maybe loving the dark people and giving them a pass when whites are being descrimenated against more than ever in history, all for PC and to make liberals feel good about hate.

I’m a righty. Hell, my left hand is too dumb to type and can barely manage to pick my nose.

There’s no ‘I’ in tag-team*

*VgbR

Meanwhile, it’s the 21st Century, why don’t these guys have a web store?

customers have to be visually verified as a monster. It’s a nanny state regulation.

Tintin “That may be a hard distinction for you to grasp, but I suppose you’ll explain that by pointing out that there are other stupid people besides yourself.”

Haters gotta hate, and I understand that is the point of the site.

My only question is, what do you get out of it?

You don’t become a critical thinker by constructing better ad hominems. You don’t become a better person if your only retort to anyone is carefully-honed snark. You only attract people interested in spite — which means when a sensible commenter shows up, he is simply attacked, and that is that.

If you hated the argument, and not the humans making the argument… you’d come to think more logically, determine truth more easily, and not just take a big, steaming dump on whomever you’re speaking to.

Build a better world… that is my bottom line.

customers have to be visually verified as a monster.

You mean, if I go there I’ll have to drop trou?

I didn’t get searched ONCE during my turkey day trip. 🙁

“What are you smuggling under that shirt, lady?”

You mean, if I go there I’ll have to drop trou?

sure, I bet they love a chuckle.

Anyone want to build a better world in Undertoad’s bottom line?

Build a better world… that is my bottom line.

*VBDSMR

Undertoad is David Fucking Brooks?

Concern troll is playing the “both sides do it JUST THE SAME AMOUNT EXACTLY” card? On a holiday weekend?

Why do toads hate Christmas?

Hell, my left hand is too dumb to type and can barely manage to pick my nose.

OMG, you are a lefty hater! Poor lil guy.

Anyone want to build a better world in Undertoad’s bottom line?

My parents gave away my LEGOs in 1982. %^(

Anyone want to build a better world in Undertoad’s bottom line?

See my comments in previous thread re: As long as the checks clear.

But I would suspect there will some serious foundation reconstruction work. Underpinning at the least, if not helical piers.

“Sadly, No! Building a better world….by mocking wingnuts.”

and not just take a big, steaming dump on whomever you’re speaking to.

we accept all perversions here.

Especially actor.

O/T, best reader comment evar on the novel:

just wanted to say thanks for Rise Again. I have never read an entire book in my life. I read yours in 3 days time. I am currently reading it again because my craving hasnt been satisfied. Will there be a sequel? and any chance of this story hitting the big screen?

I can’t tell you how touched I was to get that. But now what? I want to recommend things. Maybe Steve King’s short stories, maybe ‘The Stand’… Harry Harrison’s Deathworld trilogy, The Hobbit… Turn this spark into a fire.

helical piers

You mean DNA?

But now what? I want to recommend things.

My Little Pony Shambler.

The Oregonian called it a Holiday tree? Obviously this plot is due to the DFH’s.

Hey Spengler, got yer book delivered today. It’s sitting all smooth and uncreased in a priority position in the media backlog.

I’m hoping for some motorway-crippling snow to come down so I can ‘sink my teeth in’, so to speak

I’m no Helical Piers Anthony, but hope you enjoy it as much as it’s going to enjoy you.

Oddly enough, while the media and the wrong wing obsess about an inept attempted terrorist act (in part enabled and set up by the FBI) by a scary brown man with a funny religion. there has been almost no attention to this guy who had so much explosives in his house that the authorities had to withdraw from the premises as too dangerous for them. Wonder what could possibly be the difference between the tow incidents?

Build a better world…with Legos.

Build a better YTTERBIUM PROOF world

“Underpantsload said,”

Yer bottom line is no place for any world except the crotch cricket infested dingleberry forest you’ve been cultivating. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go rinse my brain with Clorox.

*guffaw*

That guffaw was for exford.

There are five elements named after Ytterby, Sweden:
Erbium, Terbium, Ytterbium, Yttrium, and Athol.

He looks just like Tom Cruise except with blondish hair.

and not just take a big, steaming dump on whomever you’re speaking to.

Your unstated assumption is that there is no way joking about a person can lead to a better world. Also apparently that no one can do anything to build a better world if they occasionally laughing at those they think are acting ridiculously. You are of course free to believe what you like, but I think most people here would disagree on both counts. They might also laugh at you and discuss sexing your mother, which you may either consider proof of man’s incivility to man or japing local color.

They might also…discuss sexing your mother, which you may…consider…japing local color.

That’s a funny way to spell “gaping.”

“both sides do it JUST THE SAME AMOUNT EXACTLY”

That was not what I wrote, and not what I ever thought.

I think the right is far worse in knee-jerk name-calling and dismissal of arguments. People like M*lkin and C*ulter make it practically mainstream. But copying their tactics is just making everything pro wrestling.

Atholl Brose (or Athol Brose, Athole Brose) is a Scottish drink obtained by mixing oatmeal brose, honey, whisky, and sometimes cream Wikipedia says so.
No mention of Ytterbium as an ingredient. Unless you’re a hater trying to make a worser world!!!

No mention of Ytterbium as an ingredient.

Given that you live in the upside-down part of the world, you can’t be expected to know the old question I was answering: What are the four towns in Massachusetts named after John Quincy Adams?

Hint: number three is Marblehead.

But copying their tactics is just making everything pro wrestling.

Ridicule and mockery are useful and potent antidotes to stupid, delusional, and destructive individuals and ideas. A necessary part of building a better world is eliminating the ideas and marginalizing the people who promulgate them.

N__B

Shirley?

Stop calling me that.

John Quincy Vacuumslayer…

You know, Undertoad, the best way to defend people being attacked is to say nice things about the person doing the attacking. Actually confronting the attacker–that’s just making it all professional wrestling.

Okay, underload, here’s a proposal: I’ll have Sadly, No! Customer Service refund your subscription fee and you can go spend your time at places that you find more uplifting rather than hanging around here, hands on hips, humorlessly calling us bad people for humorously calling other people bad people. Okay?

Sadly, No! Customer Service

Whenever I call, I get “The Four Seasons” played on a accordion as hold music and hang up before I get served.

When I call, all I hear is heavy breathing.

When I call, all I hear is heavy breathing.

You’re a bad person, making fun of the asthmatic.

YEEESH!

Dunno where the 18 minutes came from; word is he tried to detonate several times with his cell phone before being taken into custody.

Dunno where the 18 minutes came from

Don’t worry about it. Tricky Dick didn’t know where they went to.

Undertoad – We’re basically evil, granted, but a lot of what goes on around here is just good-natured ribbing.

Dunno where the 18 minutes came from

From the same orifice from which the wingnuts extract all their “facts”.

‘Welcome to the Sadly, No! Customer feedback hotline. For concern-troll related enquiries, press one. For detonation of Portland area explosive deives, press two repeatedly. If you’re Gavin M, hold the line and we will negotiate with your hostages..’

DEIVES

devices

DEIVES IRAES

hostages

KIDNAPPERS

Fuck.

Ahhhh, thank you. Well done.

Sadly, No … alicublog, Snark Hunting, Driftglass, Doghouse Riley… many others including about 5 Jane Austen blogs.

They keep me from going absolutely apeshit insane with rage and frustration and grief over what is going on in our country. Can’t speak for all the SadNoses, but I DO read the political-news blogs, to my despair. I DO sign petitions, send $$$ to the occasional outspoken honest-appearing politician. Deep Sigh. It seems so futile- sometimes you gotta laugh, jeer, mock. Otherwise I might end up entangled in a really stupid FBI sting.

Disraeli!!!

hostages

Fuck.

It works either way in this case.

“… press two repeatedly …”

That actually made me laugh aloud. I hardly ever do, a sour smile is my usual response. Thankyou…

LOL N__B

boop boop boop
‘The bomb you are trying to detonate is a fake. Please hang up the phone and surrender to authorities.’

N_B, don’t kid a kidder. I know all about those infamous Sadly, No all-night polka parties.

I haven’t called anyone bad people Tinnie. That’s just something you made up in order to attack me. That’s what everyone has done and I’m well familiar with the game of identify and attack the outsider until he leaves. It’s good work, and at the end of the day you have a site where everyone remaining agrees on how the echo chamber of laughs operates.

Because it’s meant to be funny! Ha! Ha! Those people are such morons, ha ho haw! It’s humor alright, but not really a sophisticated humor, right? Dick jokes are funny and I wouldn’t be down on a comic who uses them, but for a whole 45 minute set? Really, that’s all ya got?

But finding your material is the same whether it’s based on GP, or The Oregonian… fuckin laugh riot to the people who disagree with you, huh?

Up your game man, you’re on Memeorandum now.

Somehow, I get the feeling that the message one would get from calling the Sadly, No! customer feedback hotline would go something like this.

N_B, don’t kid a kidder.

I don’t. I stopped when the court order kicked in.

@Major Kong, thanks man I appreciate it.

You know, that comment made 3 hours ago would have disarmed me.

DEIVES IRAES ISREAL

flaxebn

“Dick jokes are funny and I wouldn’t be down on a comic who uses them, but for a whole 45 minute set?”

Undertoad has seen my stand-up. 🙁

Undertoad: good name, BTW. …. You liked “Word according to Garp”, you sound intelligent even slightly progressive-leaning.

Why don’t you just enjoy yourself with the SadNoses? Even more than we (they) like to pick-a-little peck-a-lot at teh Trolls, we like clever new voices.

Grab a beer, hop in the hot tub. Flirt with “Truculent & Unreliable” (my favorite screen name, makes me consider changing to “Highly Irascible” -a note I spotted on a Hospital file of mine.

Don’t wanna end up like Smut Clyde
Poor me, the Sasquatch Isrealite

Undertoad has seen my mine stand-up. 🙁

fixxored for orly-ness

I voted straight D in the last three elections, K! I was a hard code libertarian but I realized it was a mistake.

Don’t wanna end up like Smut Clyde

A little unguent will fix that right up.

Ridicule is the only weapon which can be used against unintelligible propositions.

“hard code libertarian but I realized it was a mistake.”

Hard coding anything is always a mistake.

Thomas Jefferson said,
November 27, 2010 at 21:39 (kill)

Ridicule is the only weapon which can be used against unintelligible propositions.

Well said, Slaveowner of Liberty!

Also, too,

When someone rides out bare-ass nekkid into the ring, does a headstand on the saddle and proceeds to douse the audience with explosive diarrhea, it is not incivil to mention what a disgusting wretch they are. It is also not an act of hate to withhold any applause for the headstand, no matter how well executed.

Justme –

You need to attend better rodeos. At the high end (Cirque du Vallée du Soleil, for example) it’s the clowns (in my example, JSMcC) who have the diarrhea.

Geez dude, was just tryin to get some lulz

Occasionally I will feel the same as Undertoad (assuming UT is sincere and not just trolling). For example, I wasn’t so upset about the Senate being “broken” during the health care debate, because those exact same “broken” aspects are what helped Bush’s ridiculous Social Security plans go down. A lot of liberal activist types that I followed on Twitter did not feel the same.

The difference, of course, is that nobody was making up ridiculous shit about the Social Security privatization, or just stone ignoring a major aspect of a story the way Hoft is doing. That’s what deserves to be mocked.

Heh. Well-said, justme.

So is that a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ on adding a place setting? There is a table just for the earnest.

a Scottish drink obtained by mixing oatmeal brose, honey, whisky, and sometimes cream Wikipedia

served at

all-night polka parties

Sounds like it would provide

Underpinning at the least

ugly hunchy made me giggle. Is the Earnest table little and made of plastic?

Ok, Undertoad?

I know you’re just a tired old concern troll model with little grasp on what words mean, but, well…I think it’s the little grasp on what words mean part that makes me want to respond briefly.

Ad hominem does NOT mean “insult” or “adding an insult to a correct criticism of action, style, or character”.

It is a specific fallacy where one tries and dismiss critics or opponents and basically makes a personal attack and claims that because of the personal flaw cannot possibly be correct in their assumptions or anything else.

It is looked down upon not because “it is mean”. It is looked down upon because it is fact free and assertion free and it is a distraction tactic usually employed to prevent one’s audience from being exposed to proofs against one’s error-filled bullshit. I.e. it is almost only ever used by people who are wrong and are trying to use that to reinforce in-group dynamics.

So, now that the phrase has been explained…

What part of Tintin’s statement was factually inaccurate?

Was there not a substantive point made with regards to the original article and comments that directly addressed and/or showed evidence to the truth claims being made?

No, it doesn’t fucking matter if he was rude or brusque in these statements. If I was explaining how evolution works, it wouldn’t be less real or my explanation any less correct if it was interspersed with curse words.

Substance over style.

Now, let’s look at your initial claims. You tried to “call out” Tintin by basically making the argument that the mainstream media (one which has wholly capitulated to the insane right-wing and is no less susceptible to unconscious racism, sexism, homophobia, etc…) did the objectionable actions.

The problem with this is that this in no way invalidates Tintin’s argument. If something is objectionable, the fact that other people, people who should know better are doing it is sad, alarming, and depressing. And well, it’s still a bad thing when the completely insane do it.

So, your statement was a complete fail and when people corrected you, all you have done is jump from innocuous comment to innocuous comment as a distraction from the fact that you really have nothing.

I mean, you don’t understand what ad hominem means, you have no real rejoinder to the post in question other than “other people suck too”, and yet are trying to use it to justify some sort of “both sides do it” idiotic and may I add tired argument.

What I’m saying, kid, is that you should be grateful that most of the responses to you have been off-topic japes, because you are way out of your league when it comes to brainpower and if you managed to get the “serious discussion” you crave (on a fucking comedy blog), your flesh would be torn from your bones by the level of logical evisceration you would endure.

I guess, what I’m saying is:

POOP.

Cerberus –

Your argument is completely invalidated because you’re a mean meany. Also, I’d like to have your children. Because I’m at work and STARVING.

Is the Earnest table little and made of plastic?

(Obviously vs has never even been near the Earnest Table).
Oh no. Stable oak. Weighty silverware. Deep, rich tablecloths. Placemats with quizzes about Marcus Aurelius.

I’m as fond of aureoles as the next man, but marking them seems extreme.

Chairs of rich Corinthian leather?

omg, an N_B joke I didn’t have to Google to get. *pats self on back*

If I was explaining how evolution works, it wouldn’t be less real or my explanation any less correct if it was interspersed with curse words.

But it would be more fun!

N_B

I do make fantastic children.

A good baste and some aromatic vegetables for flavor really do bring out the unique succulent taste. And you’d be surprised what a little splash of wine brings to the meal.

I am sitting at the computer eating carrots and romaine hearts with homemade ranch dressing. It is fucking delicious. Just throwing that in there…

omg, an N_B joke I didn’t have to Google to get.

I lack Gavin’s talent for psychedelic linkages, so I’m aiming for Peace Through Strength Freedom Through Work Toad Through Hole funosity through obscurity.

I lack Gavin’s talent for psychedelic linkages, so I’m aiming for Peace Through Strength Freedom Through Work Toad Through Hole funosity through obscurity.

And Funosity is achieved! And, to be fair, I have to Google other people here (when I’m not feeling lazy). DAMN YOU, INDIAN RIVER COMMUNITY COLLEGE!!!! *shakes fist at sky*

A good baste and some aromatic vegetables for flavor really do bring out the unique succulent taste.

I’m not a fancy cook, so, you know, Shake-N-Bake.

Chairs of rich Corinthian leather?

No ma’am. They are hardback, roughhewn, and uncomfortable; but that’s okay because the earnest mostly just stand, since sitting is seen as frivolous.

They are hardback, roughhewn, and uncomfortable

Marlboro Chairs.

Chairs of rich Corinthian leather?

Actually that is my lap. I follow the John Boehner school of eternal life which holds that well tanned skin will indefinitely preserve vitality.

Teh Sadly customer line talks upside down and back-to-front for me

00 + 64

Wilcome to the Sedly No! hotline, hey bro. For a sit at the table made of ruch Curintian lither, pruss one…

This comment thread needs a liberal who will cry “Entrapment!” just to justify the further existence of all the Wingnut fears. So here goes:

And Firebaglake DELIVERS!

http://my.firedoglake.com/teddysanfran/2010/11/26/fbi-thwarts-bomb-plot-at-xmas-tree-ceremony-in-portland-oregon/

And you’d be surprised what a little splash of wine brings to the meal.

My guess is it brings less than the preferred serving size.

Look.

Cerberus is just a gray, fuzzy, self-centered aardvark who thinks he’s hot shit because his comic book lasted 300 isues. No one here listens to anything he says. So crypto-concern-trolls don’t have to, either.

Also, Cerberus pees in the sink. Never has this been stated with such detail and such care.

And Firebaglake DELIVERS!

Bears a striking resemblance to so many of those supposed domestic terrorist plots uncovered during the Bush administration which involved hapless basement dwellers totally reliant on FBI plants to actually implement their byzantine schemes.

the earnest mostly just stand, since sitting is seen as frivolous.

ugly is on fire. Not literally! It’s not from a gas burner or anything. He’s just really funny today.

Cerberus pees in the sink

Aha!!

No, vs, I will not wash your dishes at home.

dammit.

Typical liberal hypocrisy. If a conservative says blacks are inferior or that women should learn to enjoy rape, the politically correct liberals are all over them.

But it’s perfectly OK to make fun of subservient ugly hunchbacks.

Rationalize THAT, liberal elitists!

Ooooooooh. Do I have the place all to myself? Perfect. *puts on polka record, luxuriates on Corinthian leather sofa*

Time for a blog pimp…and you’ll be happy to know: no picture of me or my cleavage. Did I just hear a collective sigh of relief? SHUT UP! FUCK YOU! I HATE YOU ALL!

@Cerberus, I knew a guy back in the day who used that handle, are you by any chance Dave M.?

“I know you’re just a tired old concern troll model with little grasp on what words mean, but, well…I think it’s the little grasp on what words mean part that makes me want to respond briefly.”

Dude please. If you want to know what ad hominem is, read the above… you have just committed it.

BOOM HEADSHOT

But it’s perfectly OK to make fun of subservient ugly hunchbacks.

I make fun of zombies and slutty mothers, too. I know no shame.

Still here.
Meanwhile, will visit the artist’s blog.

I have prussed one, end the thingy went all buzzy. It’s munted eye thunk.

That buzzy is the accordion!!

Uh oh, someone is going to lose their seat at the earnest table.

Also, vs is a seriously disturbed individual.

Damnit- I don’t even have a dick joke to add substance to the discussion…

00 + 64

Wilcome to the Sedly No! hotline, hey bro. For a sit at the table made of ruch Curintian lither, pruss one…

mirth

Oh, snap.

Looks like Undertoad showed YOU, Cerberus.

He does SO know what an ad hominem is.

>Because I’m at work and STARVING.

I recommend some cream Wikipedia soup.

Next up: The straw man argument.

Have any blogs had anything to say about Crazy Branson Wal-Mart Guy?

Have any blogs had anything to say about Crazy Branson Wal-Mart Guy?

I think we may be approaching peak wingnut and the singularity of stupid and crazy.

OMFG, we were eighteen minutes — EIGHTEEN MINUTES, I TELL YOU!!!! — from a Muslim trying to detonate a brick of Play-Doh.

Just think, if he weren’t a Mooslim, he would have put crispy bacon bits in that Play-Doh, to serve as tasty, greasy bits of sodium-packed shrapnel.

Crazy Branson Wal-Mart Guy was set-up by the FBI.

“Also, vs is a seriously disturbed individual”

I wouldn’t say “seriously”

Wait…you got that from Tom Waits hates casseroles?

Wait…you got that from Tom Waits hates casseroles?

All civilized people hate casseroles.

Awww. Sometimes I get such a hankering for tuna-noodle casserole.

Awww. Sometimes I get such a hankering for tuna-noodle casserole.

Is this hankering “ironic”?

Sorry, I meant that the art was disturbing. She has all these ‘oh, I’m a really normal person’ blog posts, then in the the gallery are all these demonic seeming things. Maybe it’s just me.

We’ll put tuna-noodle casserole on the menu.

“Is this hankering “ironic”?”

Not even slightly. I also don’t wear ironic t-shirts with kittens on them…or ironic trucker hats.

Gee, maybe I will get a spot at the Earnest Table.

“Sorry, I meant that the art was disturbing. She has all these ‘oh, I’m a really normal person’ blog posts, then in the the gallery are all these demonic seeming things. Maybe it’s just me.

We’ll put tuna-noodle casserole on the menu.”

I have no idea what to say to this. Just bring me some casserole. Unlike Tom Waits, I don’t hate them.

Sorry, I meant that the art was disturbing. …. in the the gallery are all these demonic seeming things.

I can see how they might be a bit disturbing, but would not call them “demonic.” They strike me as more surreal and dreamlike.

An I’m down at the corner of ‘casserole’ and ‘How do they work?’

I checked out the website for the “Hoxton Monster Store” and was really upset at them having “freshly extracted nails” on the shelves. I mean, how irresponsible can they be? They’re treating Ragnarok as if it were a joke.

An I’m down at the corner of ‘casserole’ and ‘How do they work?

Lookin for the waitress that wore a serpentine smile

That buzzy is the accordion!!

Oh, I thought that was the improvisatory kazoo solo.

Is this hankering “ironic”?

Irony-deficient anemics often crave ice, do you desire the tuna noodle casserole be frozen first?

vs , I was just hoping to get blurbed…..

like…
Disturbing!! –said the ugly hunchback that washes dishes and rings the dinner bell

The improvisatory kazoo solo is Gavin’s kidnappers negotiating with you.

Time for a blog pimp…and you’ll be happy to know: no picture of me or my cleavage. Did I just hear a collective sigh of relief? SHUT UP! FUCK YOU! I HATE YOU ALL!

Who’s the concern, troll, now? I for one, welcome, myyour cleavage, overlords.

VS can welcome my overlord

Lookin for the waitress that wore a serpentine smile

With 16 shells from a 30.06.

Back in MN we called it hot dish. Some kinds can be quite tasty, like the one I make with real wild rice, sage sausage, mushrooms, celery, onions, garlic, chicken broth and assorted spices.

“Disturbing!! –said the ugly hunchback that washes dishes and rings the dinner bell”

It’s going on my first coffee table book. 🙂

I’ll use one-word sentences so you libs will understand.

The guy at the Branson Wal-Mart needed that weapon because he knew that the Feds would persecute him if he started passing out ant-government literature.

And guess what? HE WAS RIGHT!

(I’m still working on why he didn’t actually defend himself.)

Liberals. Hmf.

“Who’s the concern, troll, now? I for one, welcome, myyour cleavage, overlords.”

Ah! *relief*. Then Pregnancy Boob Watch 2011 is a go!

Sage Sausage is what we used to call that waitress in the diner down at the corner.

Don’t beware the undertoad.

Hate the undertoad.
~

But was she a hot dish?

When I was a kid, about 12, a cop tried to set me up. He was maybe forty or fifty, I wasn’t sure because he was fat and had blond hair. I knew he was a cop because he lived across the street and I saw him in his uniform and I saw him in his cop car too. Well, one day he came over to my house right after school, about three thirty in the afternoon and asked if he could come in. He showed me the peace sign so I would think he was cool.

But I knew he wasn’t really cool because my older brother told me he was a pig. Anyhow, he sort of just came in the house and sat down on the sofa where I had put my satchel. He looked in my satchel and took out my left over peanut butter and jelly sandwich and started eating it. It took him about ten minutes until he could finish chewing.

Then he reached in his shirt pocket and pulled out a cigarette, but it wasn’t really a cigarette because it looked just like the ones my Uncle Jess made out of his Prince Albert can. Anyway, he asked me if I knew what he had, and I told him he had a Prince Albert cigarette, like my uncle Jess’s.

He asked me if I wanted to help him smoke it and then he pulled out a lighter and lit it. It smelled really funny and I knew it wasn’t a real Prince Albert cigarette. I told him he couldn’t smoke in the house and that he should go home. After he smoked half of his cigarette he put it out on his shoe and put it back in his shirt pocket.

Then he said he would come back the next day and maybe I would like to help him smoke the cigarette. He said I could ask my friends if they would like to come over too and we could all smoke and listen to Jackie Wilson’s song, Higher and Higher, then he laughed.

I told my older brother about it and he told me to stay away from the “fucking pig”, and I told my best friend, Fred, and he said maybe we could steal the cigarette and smoke it in the woods behind his house.

When the cop came over again, my older brother was at home and he asked the cop why the fuck he was trying to get his kid brother to smoke dope with him. The cop got all embarrassed and ran away. He never came over again. Fred’s older brother gave us a cigarette to smoke in the woods.

I’m frankly whelmed by underload.

Pregnancy Boob Watch 2011……………….

speechless……..

When I was a kid, about 12, a cop tried to set me up.

Set you up, or sex you up? I think he was hitting on you.

….a hot dish?

hot as a microwaved convenience store ham and cheese.

I’m with B^4. That guy was perving on you. Fucking gross.

Also, when I typed this in, my iPhone tried to auto-correct “perving” into “pegging”

Also, when I typed this in, my iPhone tried to auto-correct “perving” into “pegging”

Why question the wisdom of auto-correct?

From the middle, we notice that haters gotta hate. We notice you are one of them. We wonder whether you are going to figure this out, or just marinate in it.

All. One. Guy.

Also too hubby is watching Ark playing LSU…and he just said “that guy has two gaping holes”

Everyhing is goatse now. *sigh*

Happy Hour!!!!

Gotta go pound a couple shots and beers before starting in on the dishes.

Chef is mulling tuna and/or squirrel casserole, for tomorrow.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11834184

Actually being mean and nasty to someone is an ad hominem attack. It is an ad hominem _fallacy_ only when used as described previously.

/inner pedant taking over

Actually being mean and nasty to someone is an ad hominem attack.

Whereas I am more partial to the ad mominem.

Are we going to end up with more FBI agents posing as Islamic terrorists than Islamic terrorists, like we did with the Weathermen?

Anyway, I’ve been in Portland during this foiled/faked (practical joke played by the FBI?) terrorist attack and no one around me is even bothering to talk about it.

The other day at the V.A. hospital, we were also on lock down for a while, onstensably because someone with a gun was holed up in the building somewhere having a talk with the police. Ho-di-do. People were milling around, vaguely aware that there was a problem somewhere with a guy with a gun, but not making a big deal out of it. In the end, NOTHING HAPPENED—no one got hurt. Nice.

I would like to see news reporters end their foiled terrorist attack reports with “whatever” to help the nervous nellies talk themselves down.

I was EIGHTEEN MINUTES AWAY from telling Undertoad about how I fucked his mother. WTH, let’s do this thing anyways.

So anyways, this here comedy blog has some pretty good reach. It’s no site with camwhore livestreams, but there’s plenty of folks who read it. Because it’s Teh Funneh. It just also happens to shine a bit of a light into the dank sewers of the right blogosphere and brings us stinking froot like Jim Hoft’s piece. And while it may not be feeding the hungry masses or curing cancer or preventing the Ytterbium-powered mega-villains from advancing their sinister plot to impurify our precious bodily fluids (with Ytterbium!) – it still serves to remind us of the opportunistic fuckwits out there bent on making everyone pee their pants in fear, not in laughter.

IOW, first you get the snark, then you get the funny, then you get the pageviews and then you get the women, er I mean the increased awareness of how fucked up these fearmongering bigots are.

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE! This site is also really fucking funny.

Incidentally – hiw fucked up are these fearmongering bigots?

d00d with a deadly lump of Play-Doh, already being monitored by the FBI, who just happens to be brown:
TERROR! OMG! WE ALL COULD HAVE DIED! RAISE THE DEFCON LEVEL TO OVER NINE THOUSAND!

Bomb factory</a. so fucking filled with explosives that bomb squads have decided that it's too dangerous to invesigate – discovered accidentally by the guy's gardener stepped in a pile of explosive powder – although the guy happens to be a fifty-something white dude:
*crickets*

Being snarky and mean about it?
Priceless.

Ugh tag fail. I blame Tintin and his mean spirited ad hominems which are either French or faggy or both.

ad mominem. Hee hee, I’m going to be using that one again.

Two tenth to two-fifteenth! I PWN U NAOW THREAD!

Are you going to make sweet sweet love to the thread now? I’ll let you two have some privacy if you wish.

Welcome to the FBI’s Terror Theater!

Watch each week and see law enforcement professionals prod and provoke the mentally ill into acting out their fantasies.

Joins us next week when we get to watch Post-traumatic Stress Disorder fanned into a killing rage.

So tune and FEEL THE TERROR!!!

I must rise in protest against the neologism “Holiday Tree”.

Regardless of changing religious fashions, the thing is and always will be a Yule Tree.

Are you going to make sweet sweet love to the thread now?

Uh – I thought that I was already doing that. Geez, I’m glad your mom cured me of self-respect, otherwise I’d be feeling pretty inadequate right now.

“Uh – I thought that I was already doing that. Geez, I’m glad your mom cured me of self-respect, otherwise I’d be feeling pretty inadequate right now.”

Omg, I’m sorry. I guess that was an “is it in yet?” moment for me.

What I like about Sadly is someone very funny puts up a post after the fashion of a starter pistol, and off go some of the wittiest, most depraved, self-indulgent people anywhere, ranting and raving for several hundred comments. There’s a hard thread of truth under it all, which is nice, but TEH FUNNEH is what brings the kids back. They could hand a late night comedy show to this crowd and it would get funnier immediately. Sadly, we racka discpr.

Poor little undertoad came in here all righteous and flurry, fluffed up his rooster feathers and look all you big boys just pooped all over him.

He reminds me of my son that I allowed to come back home this month IF HE registered in college because lawdamighty he needs him some schooling.

I guess that was an “is it in yet?” moment for me.

Mwahaha that’s what Mom said about him too!

NO WAIT… damn.

What I like about Sadly is someone very funny puts up a post after the fashion of a starter pistol, and off go some of the wittiest, most depraved, self-indulgent people anywhere, ranting and raving for several hundred comments.

And here I was thinking the wittiest, most depraved, self-indulgent people were all having a big orgy after a Wodehouse reading. My imagination sometimes runs wilde (sic).

They could hand a late night comedy show to this crowd and it would get funnier immediately.

Ahem: As when sometime in the recent past I typed that S,N! was the world’s largest writers room.

Now where the hell’s the writers ass’t. in charge of snacks & beverages? I want a Yoo-hoo!

post-Wodehouse traipses and Sadly No! don’t clash, B^4

Far be it from me to agree with the hated FDL, but I think that Partridge fellow is more or less right on this one. The guy did everything short of slipping on a banana peel to fuck up, and the FBI played him for a whole year. What did they get out of it? A big headline.

The only justification for a prolonged sting operation like this would be to take down someone big or to dig up more information on the target’s contacts. This loser didn’t know shit about anyone or anything and they spent god knows how much time and money and effort to turn him into a big scary Credible Threat.

I suspect that if the FBI cared to poke around the Prison Planet forums and invest a year of effort, they could probably get some Glenn Beck watching ignoramus to drive a fake carbomb up to the Tides Foundation or a hotel where the dreaded SOROS was staying. Same with Stormfront. They’ve egged greenies into blowing up SUVs for Gaia before.

This is a complete non-story, and I live in Portland.

(Of course, if someone did plant a bomb at Pioneer Square, I wonder how many tears Gateway Pundit would shed over a couple dozen killed and maimed queers and libtards.)

(Of course, if someone did plant a bomb at Pioneer Square, I wonder how many tears Gateway Pundit would shed over a couple dozen killed and maimed queers and libtards.)

In that case, the narrative would shift to “they deserved it because they protested when the Homeland Security Administration waterboarded illiterate goatherds turned in for bounty money and vengeance by their neighbors.

Damn you Forza. Here I was, wallowing in smug self-satisfaction (not an euphemism for masturbation) about coining that phrase – when all along, you’ve been laughing it up for years! Sept. 18, 2006? Grrrrr. I… I… gimme a minute here… got it… I’d have beaten you to that bit of brilliance, but I was too busy doing your mom.

Here I was, wallowing in smug self-satisfaction (not an euphemism for masturbation) about coining that phrase

I hear ya, I felt the same way about Ozymandumbass. Worst thing is, Yahoo search has no results, so I almost wrote a post in exultation.

I’d have beaten you to that bit of brilliance, but I was too busy doing your mom.

As were we all, DKH, as were we all…

SIGH

We’re going to be seeing a big asplodey of FBI stings and weird drug busts and investigations, I suspect, in the next couple of years — it’s great press, and they’ve figured out Obammy won’t do anything whatsoever to reign in their fun.

I get a sense it’s going to be like in the early 1970s, when the gummint cops were transforming small groups of cranks into big scary coup-capable armies, and peaceful protests into riots, and all the rest of it. I was a kid then. I remember thinking, “is America so fragile that these 20 people can bring it to its knees?
The answer is yes, as long as it’s lucrative for the security apparatus budget.

I know I’m way late on this, but between the Venus de Milo and DEIVES IRAES, we all owe N__B one internet each for tonight’s performance. And N__B owes me a new keyboard.

I get a sense it’s going to be like in the early 1970s, when the gummint cops were transforming small groups of cranks into big scary coup-capable armies, and peaceful protests into riots, and all the rest of it.

I have heard that everybody in the CPUSA knew who the COINTELPRO agent was because he was the only one who paid his membership dues on time.

” And N__B owes me a new keyboard.”

But you haven’t even gotten to the part about my boobs yet.

Hey Dr. Psycho,

Regardless of changing religious fashions, the thing is and always will be a Yule Tree.

SHUT UP, you fucking NAZI! It’s a CHRISTMAS tree! Why do you hate JESUS so MUCH? Are you a MUSLIN?!

Ad hominem: am I doin it rite?

But you haven’t even gotten to the part about my boobs yet.

On the contrary, I have been weeping bitter, bitter tears about the absence of your boobs. I just didn’t think it was polite to point that out.

Ad hummernem

Fixt for more naughtiness

Maybe add adhummernem to ad mominem to make ad mammanem?

Sure, why not?

A Google image search for ad mammary has some stuff you probably don’t want to see. Don’t go look.

You won’t be laughing NEXT time, because NEXT time … it’ll be Silly Putty!

Appears to be a distinct pattern of these “domestic terrorists” being the sort of people that would need a cheat-sheet to matriculate beyond the short-bus. What I’m saying is … for its own sake, America needs to watch Trig, especially if he isn’t having a good day.

Uh oh, someone is going to lose their seat at the earnest table.

I’ve snuck away to go fap gambol & caper many a time. They always let me have my seat back … the naive fools!

My boobies broked the thread. I sorry, thread. I’ll be a good girl now.

Just going back over the thread…

Oh, my god! I love ‘vague sense of unease’! I always wondered where that came from!

Here I was blaming the “FNORDs”.

ugly is on fire.

Better throw him in the water.

Poor little undertoad came in here all righteous and flurry, fluffed up his rooster feathers and look all you big boys just pooped all over him.

I warned you all about this. Thanksgiving = projectile shitting.

I know I’m way late on this, but between the Venus de Milo and DEIVES IRAES, we all owe N__B one internet each for tonight’s performance. And N__B owes me a new keyboard.

I’ll give you the keyboard just for being the only person to respond to Venus, which I thought was my best line. BTW: until now, it was all in the office. I truly amaze myself with the lengths I’ll go to not to write a report.

My boobies broked the thread.

Pix or it didn’t happen.

pix

I’ll be a good girl now.

Please don’t.

pix

My tongue was just eaten by a grue.

And can police/officials “thwart” a “car bomb” “attack” if the FBI drove the plot and the “car bomb” is a fake bomb with a fake detonation mechanism? Shouldn’t the headlines be more like “Police nail teen in car bomb sting”?

I’ll give you the keyboard just for being the only person to respond to Venus, which I thought was my best line.

It was so good that I felt obliged to give my wife give the back story on “You know who else…” then read out the preceding four posts just so I could back it up as the punchline. It took me a few seconds to get it; she burst out laughing right away. So you can at least rest assured that your procrastination has not been in vain.

WordPress eats another post – & another angel gets its wings piles.

It was something to the effect that: you libz will be laughing out the OTHER hole when teh terrists escalate to Silly Putty … & that given the caliber of domestic villains’ intellectual firepower, DHS surely needs to have a 24/7 team watching Trig’s every move. “Fox Leader, this is Fox Two. Confirm visual recon on Tango Papa – looks like he’s still having a pretty good day, over.”

MERDE.

Poor little undertoad came in here all righteous and flurry, fluffed up his rooster feathers and look all you big boys just pooped all over him.

I plead Not Guilty By Reason Of Apathy, yer honor.

you libz will be laughing out the OTHER hole when teh terrists escalate to Silly Putty

I just ate dinner. I’d appreciate you not conflating Silly Putty and goatse.

I’ll give you the keyboard just for being the only person to respond to Venus, which I thought was my best line.

It was pretty awesome- I just needed some serious thread catch-up.

Mammaries … Like the corner of my mind…..

Ok this is the second time I’ve linked to pix in my blog and suddenly everyone has disappeared. It makes me feel like I have B.O. or something…

But in all EARNESTNESS I know I’ve been incorrigible lately. I blame the hormones, which seriously do make me feel–well let’s just say for decency’s sake–randy…and flirty. And you’ve all been more than accommodating…which is awesome of you.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, Hunchy is saving me a seat at the Earnest table. Yay!

Misty water-colored mammaries? Hmmm… Nereid? I need to ask DK if your mom’s name is Doris…

I need to ask DK if your mom’s name is Doris…

I think it’s Mulva.

Mammaries are usually about 50% of my mind at any given time. 20 years ago it was about 75%.

I’m sorry, but I often don’t find N__B funny at all. Mostly because the jokes, they go right over my pointy haid.

And VS: seen thos pix. Moar plz or we may lose interest and leave you all alone an unmolested. (see, this is more my speed)

exford legs: There’s no ‘I’ in tag-team*

Way down South it’s pronounced “taig team,” and as you can see, there is an “I” in there.

Ok this is the second time I’ve linked to pix in my blog and suddenly everyone has disappeared. It makes me feel like I have B.O. or something…

I think it’s the “or something”, they’ll be back in ten minutes or so.

I have to google most of N_B’s jokes. But it’s worth it cuz I wuv him.

And, WC, I’m all pixed out for now. All I can offer is updates on the status of my breasts.

I often don’t find N__B funny at all.

Mrs. __B, is that you?

All I can offer is updates on the status of my breasts.

They’re growing rapidly now, and in just a few months they’ll take their first steps!

Rofl

Mrs. __B, is that you?

Well I’m here with yer mom, if that’s who you’re referring to.

All I can offer is updates on the status of my breasts.

Well I guess I’ll have to take what I can get because at this point I’m desperate very interested.

Well I’m here with yer mom

Given how cold it gets in her graveyard, I’m impressed.

Hmmm.

A little fuller…tender…plus I’m fascinated with them…ok, I’m gonna stop before this turns into S,N After Dark.

plus I’m fascinated with them

Join the club- high five, VS!

fuller…tender…plus

You can learn so much here.

*high 5*

I step out into the wind and cold, and it hits me- my last comment should have been:

One of us! One of us!

Unfortunately, “preview” is no substitute for “rough draft, then revision”.

From the “fulling” link:

In Roman times fulling was conducted by slaves standing ankle deep in tubs of human urine and cloth. Urine was so important to the fulling business that urine was taxed. Urine, known as ‘wash’, was a source of ammonium salts and assisted in cleansing and whitening the cloth.

The extra “E”…

I’d post a link for my poor joke, but last time I looked up that phrase, the first result was Our Lady of the Shit Moat’s place.

**shudder**

All I can offer is updates on the status of my breasts.

F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5

OK, Sadly after dark has my complete attention. Please tell us more…

Ok, but this is it…and I’m not even sure it’s that scandalous. Let’s just say, if I don’t play with them, who will? Who, I ask?!

A urine moat is more practicle than a shit moat.

I would volunteer my services in the name of science.

VS, you have left us a gaping hole through which to thrust our jokes. Please at least try to make it a little bit of a challenge.

And N__B, the secret is layering.

Gaping holes and shit moats are throwing a big bucket of ice water on my naughty parts.

“I would volunteer my services in the name of science.”

Ok but ONLY for science.

“We notice that haters gotta hate. We notice you are one of them. We wonder whether you are going to figure this out, or just marinate in it.”

Hat-tip to Crid for spotting and calling attention to the plurals in Undertoad’s first post. Until then, I had been undecided: Troll? Not a troll? (I tend to be a benefit-of-the-doubt guy.) Undertoad’s tone was combative from the first. But the royal ‘we’ nails it for me.

I’m a lurker, btw. I visit SN every day and often go the comments to get a fix of intelligent, rapid-fire wit. 20 on the hype, tonight, folks. Thanks.

People are gonna see this thread tomorrow and be like “WTF?”

Ok…sweet dreams, everybody.

VS, something popped up, and it’s hot enough.

Oh, sure, you can go to Wal-Mart, buy a backpack, buy a gun, buy some ammo, buy some cold medicine, buy some brake cleaner, and take it home, but all of a sudden, if you go into Wal-Mart with a backpack full of ammo and meth and a gun, you’re some kind of weirdo!

(Okay, he is some kind of weirdo.)  

My Grinell journal is ready.

I can’t wait to hear the right wingers scream when the FBI does this sting to a winger terrorist.

In this age of austerity, why aren’t the wingers screaming for FBI privatization? They all hate ‘the feds’ anyway. It’s like a comicbook perpetual motion machine: hate the gubment on one side, tuff on crime on the other.

I knew I’d seen this guy before:

http://www.donmartinshrine.com/html/gallery1.htm

Has it occurred to anyone that he and people like him are the enemy?

But the royal ‘we’ nails it for me.

A little know fact: Queen Victoria was a troll, and passed the troll genes on to Kaiser Wilhelm and Tsar Nicholas, thus indirectly causing World War I.

N__B

Gavin was onto something about the trolls/haxxorz

When Dollfuß (who incidentally, at 4’11,” wins the giant lollypop as the Littlest Dictator) was shot and killed by domestic Nazi party haxxorz in 1934, Mussolini threatened war with Germany, while rioting broke out in northern Italy as Nazis attempted various shows of force and power grabs there.

.

It’s cruel beyond words to give a giant anything as a prize for being little. To inflict optical illusions on people is no better than forcing them to have aural sex.

I see my evil twin was here last night. She’s just like me except she has no inhibitions and is, well, evil. I apologize for her behavior. I’ve chained her to my bed so she can’t do anymore harm.

And just remember this:
Haters gotta hate
Lovers gotta love
Trollers gotta be concerned. Very concerned.

Everyone knows Play-Doh is non-toxic.

OK, I’m at istock looking for pics of Siberia and look what I find.

Oh
em
gee

Erm, let’s try this again.

I’m at istock looking for pics of Siberia

Really?

nice puppies

I’m at istock looking for pics of Siberia

Really?

Yup. Just picked up a gorgeous birch forest one.

Puppy fry tomorrow at Hove, Actually!

*refuses to Google “Hove”*

Don’t look at me.. I live in Hove, but I only burn couches.

exford, I don’t trust that cat…not one bit.

I’ve got Mini__B while mom’s asleep. One of his favorite positions is fake standing, where i hold him upright (my hands under his armpits) and he pushes off my lap with his legs.

So…it would be wrong for me to masturbate by having my son give me a foot job, right? AFAF.

I wouldn’t put it past Marley, she though we said ‘fry the pooch’ but she set fire to the couch instead. Bloody destructive when she’s bored.

The First Law of Internet Millinery and Haberdashery

Hatters Gonna Hat.

So…it would be wrong for me to masturbate by having my son give me a foot job, right? AFAF.

There’s a lot of wrong in that question. Right now I’m not feeling so bad about my Evil Twin™.

Oops, my bad! Sorry Marley! You’re a ladycat! Don’t set the dog on fire! Bad cat! Bad!

Right now I’m not feeling so bad about my Evil Twin™.

Some of us reabsorbed our evil twins while still enwombed.

What? You think yer betta than me?

I blame society.

In Russia, society blames you.

Because even there, haters still gonna hate.

In Soviet Russia, evil twin absorbs YOU!

What? A naughty version of VS, chained in a bed? You say this like it’s going to calm us down?

“What? A naughty version of VS, chained in a bed? You say this like it’s going to calm us down?”

I’ve made her quit thrashing around, bra-less.

*sigh* I breaked it agiyun.

Ok, off to the pub.

A naughty version of VS, chained in a bed?

Errrr, remember I said I wouldn’t wash your home dishes…..there may be room for negotiation.

Psssst, Hunchy. Lemme out of these cuffs and I’ll make it worth your while.

I’ll get a hacksaw. Wait, how did Quasimodo rescue Esmerelda………brb.

So…rather than throw ice water through a gaping hole onto VS’s naughty bits again, I’ll just point out that two wrongs don’t make a right.

Unless one of the wrongs is committed by a dirty Muslin, then all actions are justified automatically.

My naughty parts are still hot…but that story is depressing. *sigh*

Alvöru Borð, Kapara Stol, Serjetà Tal-Mejda

Baby names, peoples. Icelandic, Croatian, and Maltese for Earnest Table.

Alusel Kärnkonn, Chiniya Chura

Estonian and Swahili, for Undertoad.

If none of these work for Bebe Vacuumslayer, feel free to use them to populate your next sword ‘n’ sorcery tale.

Currently, I am favoring Nontristis, Chakusikitisha Hakuna, or Tidak Sedih, which are, respectively, Latin, Swahili, and Indonesian. And are eponymous, woo hoo.

ahhhhhhhhh, shit.
To avoid getting upset about the mosque arson, I’m going to focus on shitting myself over the Koreas.

Sorry, EvilVS. It’ll have to wait.

To avoid getting upset about the mosque arson, I’m going to focus on shitting myself over the Koreas.

For a change of pace, try pissing yourself over the congressional plan to eliminate the tax break on employer-provided health care.

This thread just cold bringz da lulzorz!

From the writers room:
So we got a toad, evil breasts, the Earnest table and a footjob.
Who’s going to be the wacky best friend?

Who’s going to be the wacky best friend?

I nominate T&U. There’s endless friend-barging-in-the-door possibilities with crutches.

If Sadly, No were stranded on a desert island, you better believe there would be mass sodomy and cannibalism before first nightfall.

My boobies broked the thread. I sorry, thread. I’ll be a good girl now.

Sounds like the Tit Fairy paid you a visit.

From the writers room:
they’re on a desert island. This promising…sort of a “Lost” ….homage

try pissing yourself over the congressional plan…

Yes. Good. Coffee scented.

If Sadly, No were stranded on a desert island, you better believe there would be mass sodomy and cannibalism before first nightfall.

You say that like it’s a bad thing.

sort of a “Lost” ….homage

Or a Lord of the Flies fromage.

I’m thinking Lord and Flies, two wacky cops fighting the evil Boobwoman. They replenish their powers by sitting at a table with a guy called Earnest who is like that guy in the time jumping series.

me said,

November 28, 2010 at 19:22

= WTF TAGFAIL !?//1??/1!//?

Smalltag works in preview like a charm, gosh darn fuck it all to heck.

evil Boobwoman

My disbelief doesn’t suspend that far.

evil Boobwoman

My disbelief doesn’t suspend that far.

Man, have you been reading the comments here? She sows (in all senses of the word) trouble wherever she and her Boobs of Disaster go!

Dude, that’s not trouble.
Trouble would be K-Lo doing like VS.

Trouble would be K-Lo doing like VS.

Breeding?

If Sadly, No were stranded on a desert island, you better believe there would be mass sodomy and cannibalism before first nightfall.

I! W? Coordinates?

Speaking of the Earnest Table, that’s how I found S,N. I was reading my Glenzilla, as I dutifully did, and he linked to something by HTML Mencken, and I discovered S,N, its commenters, and Junkpuncho, the Cockpunching Llama, and I haven’t been back to Greenwald much since, I hate to say. He was getting a little tiresome. Actually, he wasn’t, reality was.

Earnest Table is the wacky best friend. Running gag: Earnie explains how evolution works interspersed with curse words. ‘It’s fucking natural selection, dude. The Galapagos Islands are full of that shit.’

Also ‘Lost’ migrates from the desert island. Let’s do a jump to Ytterby, Sweden.

If Sadly, No were stranded on a desert island, you better believe there would be mass sodomy and cannibalism before first nightfall.

But foremost would be gay abortions on demand, for free.

Let’s do a jump to Ytterby, Sweden.

I’m seeing an “evil boobs/Swedish bikini team” mash-up.

Ahh, now I see, Getting a seat at the table is the importance of being earnest.

She’s distracting all the boys from some Very Important Snarking with her Subversive Breasts of +1 Chaos.

Yes, chowder, it is important to refresh before posting your hour-old joke.

“Sadly, No! Lost on Snark Island” could be next season’s big hit.

You’ve got the gay European, the gay west coaster, the randy New Yawker, the blond flirt with the tits, the sexxy liberrian who’s also the wacky sidekick (imagine her trying to run her knee scooter over the beach sand. Hilarious!) the bald and vaguely disturbing science freak, the bug researcher from Down Under (or parts nearby), the potty mouthed Canadian and a cast of thousands of smart-mouthed, sharp tongued jackasses to make cameo appearances.

Instant classic!

Y’see, funny needs three ingredients to flourish: fuel, air, and posting space. It’s easy to smother the air with a blanket of unfunny posts and thus the danger of a conflagration of hilarity is easily extinguished.

See the above three posts for examples.

Don’t forget the Evil Twin!! For when the show jumps the shark.

Do i like this pitch? You betta bet I do.

Awwww, WC–we love your jokes. *hugs*

For when the show jumps the shnark.

FTFY.

Just throwing out some titles for the epic…

Inner Pedant
DEFCON Level 9000
Vague Sense of Unease
Fuller, Tender, Plus
Boobs of Disaster

I got a Slidewhistle!!

Will there be wifi?

Will there be wifi?

Ooh yeah, good question!

As I wait, my ardor cools…

and these cuffs are starting to chafe!

We also have evil nemeses (nemesisisises?): Incoherento, the southern preacher who ensorcels you with his crazy ramblings; Mangalanga, the crazed Philipina she-ferret; Queen Arnold, who sits high in her castle surrounded by a shit moat, plotting how to stop the dusky people from dropping litters; The Greeyul-Meister, who plots against the dusky hordes coming across the sothern border and begs for funding; Teh Pantload and his evil sidekick K-Lo, who spew badly written and poorly edited misinterpretations of history and current events between begs for money.

Just spitballin’ here, of course. Feel free to add your own ebils.

Couple of places you could use this.

I envision Evil Twin as a re-occuring cameo. I see casting Lee Marvin. Except that he’s dead. Or cast against type and go with Spencer Tracey. Except that he’s also dead.

Evil vs,
It turns out that things didn’t work out so well for Quasimodo.

Hmph. Maybe WC will come save me.

Also, the role of Evil Twin has been FILLED!

I got a Slidewhistle!!

Do you have a cackle bladder and a slap stick?

Evil Twin has been FILLED!

I thought that was the Empress Nympho.

Maybe WC will come save me.

“I’ll save you, Nell!”

/Dudley DoRight

Empress Nympho. / FILLED

Nope, not gonna do it, wouldn’t be prudent, just gonna sit here on my hands…

My Ardor Cools. That would look good on the marquee too.

See? And WC reaps all the rewards.

IceNine, there’s something about the way that sounds that I like too. It’s kinda poetic-like.

I got a diddley bow.

My Ardor Cools is a great title because it’ll be the obscure in-joke only we know, then every episode we can ridicule the audience!!!!

Lee Marvin, Spencer Tracy…..Zombie Actors on the Island???

By the way, I had forgotten how incredible Charles Laughton was as Quasimodo.

fyi: Wikileaks is out .

What about the theme music? Yakkety Sax / Gorecki mix, I’m thinking.

What about My Cool Ardor, even more dissing on the audience. They’ll be all “WHAAT??” and we’ll be all “heh heh”

Show it on Fox.

Is there no composer in our midst? Or fringe.

Wondering ….if instead of the fox channel graphic popping on in the corner…..it would be

VPR

ROFL

ENH! WP no likee Evil vs!

Wondering ….if instead of the fox channel graphic popping on in the corner…..it would be

VPR

I chuckled.

Earnestly admitting that I had to googlez ‘Gorecki’. Dude had the blues I reckon.

Puppy Max: Could work. Maybe grab the audience with that nifty opening to Carmen Burana over the credits. And it will be a l-o-n-g credits roll, considering the number of Sadlynauts!

I’m still focused on casting: How about Paul Giamatti for N_B … Edward Norton for Cerebrus … and Jessica Biels for Vacuumslayer? (‘The Illusionist’ is a fun film….)

I think everyone needs to think about who might be right to portray them on the big screen. I got dibs on Peter Ustinov. Except that he’s dead.

Hoof-&-mouth doubles down on the stupidity:

Federal agents this week saved Portland citizens from a massive terror attack.

Massive!!!

A massive quote/lift from Byron York, that is.

Evilvs ain’t so evil . I suspect subterfuge.

I choose Peter O’ Toole.

Dead doesn’t matter since we have a zombie connection.

I suspect Superfudge.

Oh, and I choose Ione Skye, Ewa Frolling or young Cybill Shepard to play me. They’re actresses I somewhat favor in some way or another… at least been told that… *shrug*

Oh, and I choose Ione Skye, Ewa Frolling or young Cybill Shepard to play me.

Actually, with modern computer graphics capabilities there really isn’t any reason it can’t be all three.

Brent Spiner too obvious?

Wuups. Carmina Burana. As apology, here’s a good link to the whole piece (70 minutes total). ‘O Fortuna’ begins a 1:20 and runs through 4:10.

BIG vocal piece–perfect for all the voices here. Plus great percussion. I love the gongs!

http://www.uctv.tv/search-details.aspx?showID=11787

(I hope the link works. First time I’ve tried to insert one in SN…)

Russell Crowe as Exford Legs

Also, the scene where T&U throws the Trike Force off the trail with her orange gas-spewing Eau d’Cheeto Grenade. And thwarts Christine O’Donnell by pulling out a copy of Military magazine and escapes while the Trike force.. do what O’Donnell hates most.

How do you expect to get a young Cybil Shepard on the cast? WITHCERY?

hmm, WITCHERY

Also,

HORMONES ISRAEL

When Gateway Dumbshit was traded to Kelsey Grammer’s place from First Things, it raised the readership at both sites!

hmm, WITCHERY

I am not Evil vs for nothin’!

HORMONES ISRAEL

They are if you pay them enough.

I choose Peter Sellers. If nothing else, he could 1) make himself up to be sufficiently unattractive (particularly since he’s dead) and 2) make me funny.

“SN” – “Somanygenius “No”italls”.

This blog is great, if you like “Kinderbarfen”.

It is wonderfullen to see so many the “informed

children” of the world, such as “Cerberasshominempro”

playing in their own vomit. Oh, wait, never mind –

“this is a “comedy” blog”! : )

If Sadly, No were stranded on a desert island, you better believe there would be mass sodomy and cannibalism before first nightfall.

If cannibalism was limited to “between the thighs”…

Just throwing out some titles for the epic…

Lake Titicaca

I’m still pissed a wikileaks for stealing the name of the user-editable database of information about golden showers I was going to start.

If cannibalism was limited to “between the thighs”…

And sodomy was limited to “all up in the ear canal”.

LiberTEA, I had to detract style points for overuse of quotation marks and the poor quality of your word play, but I was wowed by the inclusion of a smiley, so 4.2 overall.

I’m still pissed … about golden showers I was going to start.

I see what you do here

I’m thinking Lord and Flies, two wacky cops fighting the evil Boobwoman.

Detective Inspector Lord and Flies of Scotland Yard’s Flying Thompson’s Gazelle Division!

Can we talk directors? I’d suggest Robert Altman, Stanley Kubrick, or Federico Fellini. Except they’re all dead.

I’m still pissed a wikileaks for stealing the name of the user-editable database of information about golden showers I was going to start.

You could call yours “wikileeaks.” Extra E, and all that.

– that mosk-arson article WC linked has seriously annoying comments. Cons’ favorite trope these days really is the “one of THEM did this to make us look bad”, isn’t it.

…Scotland Yard’s Flying Thompson’s Gazelle Division!

I nearly lost it. I think we have the title here….

Except they’re all dead.

That’s less of an obstacle than you might think in Hollywood.

Exiting to work on a synopsis / treatment for the SN epic. When I’m done, I’ll pitch it in LA.. Using a knuckleball. (I like Hoyt Wilhelm, Tim Wakefield, Phil Niekro, and Jim Bouton!)

Or maybe I’ll just pitch it altogether….

Had fun today! I’ll check in later.

Peter Lorre for the PM part. Except he’s dead.

re: gatewayp/byork

Hopped out of the boat and swam through mangoshark infested waters right to the Oregonian.

http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/11/portland_mayor_police_chief_di.html

I dunno, the Mayor might be a little off in hoping that the current Justice Dept. is much different than the previous one on the terrorist issue, but overall it sounds more like they don’t want the local police to become permanent federal agents.
What is odd is that many commenters seem to think it was the hippies screaming for more rights violations after terrorist attacks…..which I don’t remember being the case.

Oh, an actor for me……..how about Edward Norton?

Fuck. The mouth-breathers are just eating* it up.

Federal agents this week saved Portland citizens from a massive terror attack.

Letr’s try that again, shall we.

Federal agents this week brought their manufactured “terror” non-attack to culmination which resulted in saved Portland citizens from getting subjected to a massive terror keyboard commando attack by mouth-breathing bedwetters

*VCoprophagiaR

how about Edward Norton?

He died?

tigris, “Word play” acceptability and “punctuation nuance” is, of course,

in the eyes and mind of the beholder – especially on a comedy blog : )

It’s important to consider, in this 21st century, “faded torn jeans” and

“distressed clothing” while evaluating that which is for a “critique”.

You “deserve” a 5.0. Have a nice day.

Okay, Art Carney.

tigris, “Word play” acceptability and “punctuation nuance” is, of course, in the eyes and mind of the beholder

There are actual rules (who knew?!) for punctuation; you can look them up.

There’s only one rule for comedy: it has to be funny.

You’re oh-for-two, bubbie. Maybe you could go hone your skills in the comedy comment section at NRO or Atlas Juggs or something.

If your clothing is distressed perhaps you should use two smileys, that might cheer it right up. I also find doing the laundry can help, but have the bad habit of waiting until my socks have actually developed PTSD.

Also, speaking of rotten mangoes, the comments section over at Gateway Dumbshit are, well, predictable:

The muzzies did the same thing here in Georgia. They got in a little PR trouble and to focus the blame on us white and black racists, they burnt thier own mosque.

http://www.mdjonline.com/view/full_story/8621204/article-Man-who-prayed-at-mosque-charged-with-arson-in-blaze

Miranda July has my vote for director

I think I’m making a new rule that anyone who brings mangoes here also has to bring me a pressie. “muzzies” *shudder*

I was thinking Baldrick from Black Adder for bell-ringing UHTWDARTB

I haven’t seen any of miranda’s movies.

VS, the mangoes are the prezzie. After all, you didn’t say it had to be a good present.

I feel a pout coming on.

actor: Jeff Goldblum

Spengler: Paul Giamatti

Heh. I like him. Are you tall and bird-like like him?

LiberTEA, is that you, finndistan?

Paul Giamatti for N_B

The only actor who can possibly play me is Vincent D’Onofrio. Dead ringer for me when he’s not a cockroach. B^4 can attest, having gloried in my physical presence.

B^4 = Michael Chiklis.

I take actor to be a womanising intellectual like Goldblum

Good VS = Virginia Madsen.

Evil VS = Zombie Veronica Lake.

NIIIIICE

T&U = Zombie Barbara Stanwyck.

Smut Clyde = Vincent Price.

Physical educator Nick Saban: Chris Cooper

I didn’t realize P.E. Saban was dentally deprived.

That’s about all I have for anthropomorphising people’s online personalities

Substance = Evil Jimmy Stewart. (Watch “After the Thin Man” if you think such a thing cannot be.)

So we’re like, producers now?

Springtime for Hitler and Germany
Winter for Poland and France…

He was a great dancer.

-the thin man-

‘How they can expect a woman to have any mystery left for a man after living in a place like this for three days, I don’t know.’

‘Darling you don’t need mystery, you’ve got something much better. Something more alluring.’

‘What?’

‘Me.’

‘You!’

“Ha, ha..’

a bit like S,N!

Substance = Evil Jimmy Stewart. (Watch “After the Thin Man” if you think such a thing cannot be.)

I seen that. Sorta comes out of nowhere – or maybe it just seems that way considering how long that rascal is – but when he turns on the nasty, he turns it up high, son.

tigris, “Word play” acceptability and “punctuation nuance” is, of course,

You “deserve” a 5.0. Have a nice day.

Burma Shave.

Vanity demands that I point out that Virginia Madsen is nearly a decade older than I am…lovely though she is…

Although I guess that s moot cuz we’ve already brought the dead and undead into this.

Who’s Vanity? Is she good looking?

I heard she’s cruel

Only to be kind. Or maybe to be kind of cruel.

Fine. Good VS = Naomi Watts. Listening to Liev Schreiber is what turns her evil.

Who’s Vanity? Is she good looking?

Prince thought so.

Prince thought so.

He met her by a baobab tree.

So we’re like, producers now?

No, I remain a non-productive moocher.

M. stands for Minnie?

okay, we’ll change your chair from ‘M.Bouffant’ to ‘M u ff’

MALIGNANT!

I’ll be played by an animated 3-D version of myself, by the way.

How about ‘Black Ryan Down Behind the Thin Red Enemies of the Sun’? Too faptastic?

g=Meryl Streep

I am trying to come up with the perfect T&U. She has to be intelligently foxy.

Substance = Evil Jimmy Stewart

Ew new: Bugs Bunny.

Never watched much Blackadder . They talk in some weird dialect . But this was enough to convince me to go with Baldrick.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8r0a582B9hQ&NR=1.

T&U=Rosario Dawson

Tigris=janeane garafolo

I am trying to come up with the perfect T&U. She has to be intelligently foxy.

Only one person could play T&U: Tallulah Bankhead. Bonus – she’s already dead.

Hmm, I was thinking Rosalind Russell.

I go to sleep for a few blasted hours, and when I get back, S,N is absolutely smothered in vs’s boobies and T&U’s legs.

I heartily approve, and wish to bestow on both of them, this laurel & hearty handshake (wipes hands).

M. stands for Minnie?

Millicent!

Thanks, stack! Now you have to cast yourself in the S,N movie…

Rosalind Russell was for T&U, btw. Joan Blondell for VS.

I am trying to come up with the perfect T&U. She has to be intelligently foxy.
Ahem.

” Joan Blondell for VS.”

That’s….interesting.

“Mr. Slim” Matt T. Burma Shaver – nicely done.

I don’t think Stanwyk is pretty enough. *picky*

I don’t think Stanwyck is pretty enough.

There’s only one possible response to that: No.

No? But she’s funny, blonde, and beboobed!

Whale Chowder – Karl Marx is rolling his grave laughing

at your “funny rule”. This SNot blog is snot just comedy

it’s “also” a “big” “joke”.

And Stanwyck is drop-dead gorgeous as well as smart as a whip.

And Stanwyck is drop-dead gorgeous as well as smart as a whip.

Exactly.

Tigris and youfraidease: PTSDC

Hey look – ( FYI, just to help out here, and to ease the “obvious confusion”),

look over there, “that” is a “hole in the ground” – now you know the difference.

You are welcome. ” : ) : ) : )”

Karl Marx is rolling his grave laughing

Groucho Marx wonders how you got into his pajamas.

Your problem is you are just too subtle.

exford legs – Thank you, this is LiberTEA.

You have some interesting “golfing” friends, good on you.

Suggestion, please keep in touch with your extended family.

Whale Chowder – Karl Marx “stole” your pajamas.

Tigris – That, was funny.

You guys are having a good time here, guess it’s

of no use discussing politics.

BTW, any opinions here on N. Korea…

North Korea is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.

“North Korea”

Name search OVER.

Kim family = Bush family.

“Mr. Slim” Matt T. Burma Shaver – nicely done.

You don’t have to call me “mister”, mister. The whole world calls me “Hank”.

North Korea is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.

But I caaan staaaan his mother.

Substance McGravitas – exactly, although as a “wonderful human being”

he did remove the lion’s share of food off of his family’s table and

offered the food to his goose stepping royal playmates.

If only the entire world could see and understand the “miracle”

of a “beautiful” and peaceful communism utopia…

Mr. Slim” Matt T. – was wondering who in the world everyone

was talking about, it sounded like “prank” though.

N_B – we are wondering where you will “staaan” her… since you caaan.

The fact is, LiberTEA exposeses the liberals as the hippocties they are, which is , also fags. Amen

Gosh, if only there were a capitalist paradise w/ which we could contrast North Korea!!

The nation’s economic crisis has catapulted the number of Americans who lack enough food to the highest level since the government has been keeping track, according to a new federal report, which shows that nearly 50 million people — including almost one child in four — struggled last year to get enough to eat.

BTW, Leslie Nielsen will be playing me.

Leslie Nielsen will be playing me.

Forbidden Planet Leslie, or 503rd knock-off of Airplane! Leslie?

capitalist paradise

Like China! That’s who Gliber-T wants us to be just like.

Like China! That’s who Gliber-T wants us to be just like.

I, for one, am ready to take part in the Boxer Rebellion. Briefs chafe.

503rd knock-off of Airplane! Leslie?

Naked Gun 2-½ Leslie. Oh wait, that’s the same guy.

Me, I’m looking forward to the Rape of Nanking.

Ooh, that was the out loud fingers, wasn’t it?

M. Bouffant – a well said – “truthy” statement, an interesting

as expected liberalized “statistic”…

WASHINGTON — Some 17.4 million US households struggled to get enough food to eat last year because money was tight, the US Department of Agriculture said Monday…

…which of course is a bit different than Kim Jong Il stealing food from you,

that which you have grown but not allowed to consume, you would agree.

N__B
Ouch . Harsh!!!

True fact: Leslie Nielsen was Korean.

Harsh!!!

It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken. I prefer the young Leslie.

Leslie Nielsen was Korean.

Wow. What makeup can do for a guy. I heard he was actually Kim Jong Il, who kidnapped him and put himself into his movies. This is why he kept doing the same schtick over and over.

Sort of like our new troll friend.

BTW – gosh, capitalism is a scourge. Things like keyboards and computers

never should have existed or be invented or at least these necessities should be

provided to all of us for free. We want Freedom not “slavery to “ugly” capitalism”.

which of course is a bit different than Kim Jong Il stealing food from you

Woo hoo! We’re better than the worst fucking country on the planet! USA! USA!

Keep scoring those “points” FlibberTEA. Just let us know when you break for halftime.

Wouldn’t want to miss the halftime show. I hear it’s a depiction of Lady LiberTEA* giving George Washington “The Delaware” while being fisted by Thomas Jefferson.

*I trust you see what I did there.

Whale Chowder – Thank you for the acknowledgment, however

“troll” would be an incorrect term. Troll was a few statements ago,

now we are family. Kim Jong Il is a troll, everyone “loves” Kim Jong Il

even though he looks like Leslie.

…which of course is a bit different than Kim Jong Il stealing food from you

We don’t exactly live in an agrarian economy here, so the stealing is of money:

because money was tight

See there? And why was money “tight?” Because your capitalist overlords are keeping it for themselves. It was in the news.

Major Kong – Yes, USA!

You have the right spirit.

Leslie Nielsen will be playing me.

Better hurry up and shoot your scenes before rigor mortis sets in.

You might want to take your irony detector in for a tune up LiberTEA……

So far most of the cast is dead, WC.

M. Bouffant – …”capitalist overlords” : )

Sounds like a Leslie Nielsen film…

Things like keyboards and computers never should have existed or be [sic] invented or at least these necessities should be provided to all of us for free.

Please provide me w/ the name of the hedge fund manager who invented computing.

Major Kong – working fine, gauging by your comment, thank you very much.

Hey, that’s not fair! China has hardly any militarist adventures overseas! I don’t think he wants us to be that much like China.

Sadly, my synopsis / treatment for the Epic SN mega-blockbuster, action-adventure, romantic comedy and slasher film fell apart like soggy tissue paper.

It started pretty well during the Set-Up about a legendary clam the size of Tokyo that rises from the sea every thousand years. But it sorta derailed at Plot Point One when the intergalactic Space Pirates of Zilch ruthlessly seized all of Earth hair care products. Plus it was edging into really sleazy pornography. Oh well, back to the drawing board…..

Maybe we could do the location shoots in Pyongyang? The Ministry of Concrete could built some truly monumental sets! We can slip-stream most of the production behind Kim Jong Il’s obsession with movies.

Plus he’s our ally!

Kim Jong Il is weirdly fixed on film. And he’s an ally!

M. Bouffant – obviously, Al Gore….

Wuups. The last line brought to you by the Department of Redundancy Department…..

White Phowder – it IS obvious “what you have done here”.

Congratulations on your superior level of cleverosity.

Screw you all. I’m playing myself.

Screw you all. I’m playing myself.

I’m currently watching The Walking Dead. Which one are you?

So far most of the cast is dead, WC.

AHEM.

Bigot.

All I ask is that a section of the film is made of Potato prints.
And I am played by Greta Garbo who was really a man but not this time.
It’s layers

I of course would have to be played by Slim Pickens.

I of course would have to be played by Slim Pickens.

That goes without saying. Say hi to Hedley for me.

The fact is, tea was invented by the Chinese. Is LiberTEA therefore objectively pro-Communist dictatorship? The fact is, yes.

We want Freedom not “slavery to “ugly” capitalism”.

Thank you for spending what little time off you have from your job at Target (which, I should congratulate you, being similar in spelling to Taggert is the most Randian of big box retailers) to explain to us how the economy works. Or are you at The Shack these days?

We’re all a bunch of ignorant failures here, so it’s nice to have such a clear winner at the game of life spell it all out for us. Your work here is done!

However, your grasp of history might not be as strong as your knowledge of economics, because it’s pretty widely known the internet was invented by a bunch of long-haired hippies from California and thus every time you use it, it’s like giving Al Gore and Satan a simultaneous handjob.

I’m currently watching The Walking Dead. Which one are you?

AMC refused to pay scale for zombies, claiming that their SAG membership expired upon … umm.. expiration. Splitters.

Say hi to Hedley for me.

Hi, Hedy!!

Zombie, did that sound like a complaint? Well, OK, it was, but not because I hate zombies(even though YOU PEOPLE MAKE ME SICK), it’s just that your wing of the guild is so much stronger than mine.

I’m skeptical about the North Korean model of socialism. I think there are some fundemental contradictions in melding socialism with hereditary succession.

I vastly prefer anarcho-syndicalism and autonomous communes. It seemed to work pretty well in The Holy Grail. [3:15]

uh…Leslie Neilson just died. Probably nothing to do with us, but we should be careful.

I vastly prefer anarcho-syndicalism and autonomous communes.

Seems to be working for the breathers in the Walking dead. I mean, except for the racism, sexism, violence, and hatred.

uh…Leslie Neilson just died. Probably nothing to do with us, but we should be careful.

Shh. Looking to revive his career with a cameo on the Sadly, No series.

Ooooh. Look who’s watching Zombie-killing pr0n.

I’m trying to work out where we’ll fit the animated wood carvings and pornographic etchings into the screenplay.

I suppose it could be a dream sequence…

Also, too:

So far most of the cast is dead, WC.

Including the dude who’s playing me. I was mostly acknowledging what the rest of you have probably long known: Mr. Nielsen has expired on this day. And trying to turn that into a funny. I am cut to the quick that you undermine me so.

For that, I will suggest zombie Roseanne Barr to play you. Don’t worry, she’ll be long dead by the time this show gets off the ground.

Ooooh. Look who’s watching Zombie-killing pr0n.

Yeah, the breathers seem to be worse than the shamblers in that show.

So, realistic, is what I say.

Yeah, the breathers seem to be worse than the shamblers in that show.

Nobody bad-mouths Laurie Holden while I’m in my bunk.

OK, Nathan Fillon plays me. But I get to play Tintin. That’s my final offer.

She need to drop a ton to play me, but I hear death can do wonders for weight loss.

Nobody bad-mouths Laurie Holden while I’m in my bunk.

O yeah, I’m looking forward to her turning shambler. ROWR. or, perhaps, rrOOOAAHGHHARRrrrrrr.

I’m looking forward to her turning shambler.

Should be almost as good as the L.H. barbecue in Silent Hill.

your wing of the guild is so much stronger than mine.

Kitty brains in a bowl!!

NOT ZOMBIE SNACKS

Should be almost as good as the L.H. barbecue in Silent Hill.

You are a kinky bastard. You may be interested to know that I hear there’s an evil twin chained up somewhere around here…

You are a kinky bastard.

Oh, I preferred her pre-barbecue. But I appreciate post- too.

BTW, ZRM: Try “Already Dead” by Charlie Huston. Nice characterizations of shamblers, biters, and the fucking Lower East Side hipsters.

Oh, I preferred her pre-barbecue.

O, you’ve got a lady cop fetish. I see.

BTW, ZRM: Try “Already Dead” by Charlie Huston

noted. But I have World War Z and Spengler’s damn fucking famous novel up on the reading list first.

O, you’ve got a lady cop fetish.

Dated one, a long time ago. I refrained from making freudian gun jokes. The effort damn near killed me.

BTW, ZRM: Try “Already Dead” by Charlie Huston. Nice characterizations of shamblers, biters, and the fucking Lower East Side hipsters.

Skipp and Spector did a pretty good biter-in-New-York novel too, The Light At The End.

“Frisked me?! Damn near killed me!”

Hm. Needs work.

Physical Educator NIck Saban – all good points.

Not sure how to “free” us from the slavery of capitalism –

you can “enlighten” us…

One way is to just quit buying stuff. Anyway you seem to enjoy overlooking

all of the good that Corporations have done for the world.

We need few old fashioned unions – get rid of them and also get rid of

the Federal Reserve System which seems corrupts and unnecessary.

Hah. Engineers and Architects kill these threds DED DED DED.

Fortunately, I am also dead.

Except for weak-TEA trolls.

make that… seems corrupt and unnecessary.

zombie rotten mcdonald – hey – we are family, dude.

all of the good that Corporations have done for the world.

Yeah, like Exxon in Alaska, BP in the gulf, or the lovely Bhopal good thing.

Among others. Tool.

zombie rotten mcdonald – hey – we are family, dude.

come here a little bit closer, lean your head down….

dang. Another brainless libertarian. O well, feed ’em to the biters, they’ll eat anything.

In regards to Islam (submission), the “Religion of Peace” with it’s pride and joy –

Sharia Law, is a religion / form of government of peace without freedom.

So, to all of you good (and entertaining) sports here –

Freedom on Earth, goodwill to women and men.

Freedom is not free. Peace without Freedom is Nothing.

Happy Zingy Holidays.

That’s MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU JEEZIS HATER!

Happy Zingy Holidays.

Ziggy fucking sucks.

zombie rotten mcdonald – just in – the current weather forecast is for continued

sunshine and no clouds. For those who haven’t seen any sunshine for awhile…

…dang. Some fresh air is for good health.

Peace without Freedom is Nothing.

yeah, tell it to the Kurds, asswipe. Or Iraqis. Or Palestinians. Or Somali. Or any number of others that we have tried to bomb into freedom.

zingycombie rotten mcdorkald – amen, you hit your nail on the head,

guess you had to use a flashlight.

zingycombie rotten mcdorkald – if you could please be a little bit more rude,

perhaps your point would be clearer…

the current weather forecast is for continued

sunshine and no clouds

Weather is local, shit for brains.

Round here, it’s cold. Windy. Snow and freezing rain. High joblessness, and enhanced starvation, cuz we got brand new Republican Governor, Senator, and State Legislature. Likelihood of childhood death is high.

if you could please be a little bit more rude,

perhaps your point would be clearer

I will try: Lick my taint.

zingycombie rotten mcdorkald – well, you surely have a busy place

“where the sun don’t shine”..

zingycombie rotten mcdorkald – not sure what that is, can’t understand you anyway

with your mouth so full….

zingycombie

but that is fucking funny.

No kidding, it’s like a Dennis Miller joke or a Kelsey Grammar movie.

Some fresh air is for good health.

For the freedom, free it is not.

Please to walk the fork, then take another road.

Matched to the grasp of English, your understanding of the world is.

Substanceabuser McGravitas – Merry Christmas.

BadgerTEA.

White Phowder – too busy trying to figure out these carbon credits.

Please leave your email address, some folks here would like to know

where you get your weed.

LiberTEA will be played by William Hung.

zingycombie rotten mcdorkald – amen.

zingycombie rotten mcdorkald – hear he is doing quite well in Hong Kong now

or is it Pyongyang… maybe Kim Dong Il is available after retirement…

A haiku *ahem!*:

Seeking to score points
LiberTEA aims carefully
Bullet enters foot

Whale Chowder should be played by Adam Baldwin.

White Phowder – love Haiku, that is a good one. You get the

traditional 4.2 rating. Now go see a doctor for your foot, you will

have to wait in line for several hours and the doctor won’t be back

until Tuesday so, please be “patient”.

Zombie Margaret Dumont. She will be me. Stately and clueless, and imposingly be-bosomed. Yes.

Adam Baldwin who writes for BigFailywood? Fuck you, you nasty ol’ zombie.

Jeepers, it looks like that Sunday night tackle football event was unpleasant for Indianapolis fans.

Also, I killed LiberTEA or whoever. It’s more refreshing without him or her. He or she is not DED dead, just thred-ded.

Adam Baldwin

Adam baldwin, deployer of the many varieties of weapon upon the good ship Serenity.

he may be a whackaloon in real life, it is true.

Larkspurfect – everyone here is loving you…

I want to believe in Adam Baldwin, although it was disconcerting to read about his recent forays into unscripted self-expression. I think we should warm up some oil, take away his clothes, get Nathan Fillion, take away his clothes, and put them together in an arena where we can watch Fillion school Baldwin real good. Nathan will be magnanimous, Adam will be more sensible, and we will have recorded the whole thing to watch over and over. In our bunks.

You can dig up Ted Cassidy’s hand to play me, or Jack Voglin’s if Ted is otherwise engaged.

WC, no that’s Steven Baldwin. Adam is a wingnut, too, but not related to Steven and Alec.

I would love to have Paul Winfield (dead, so qualifies) handle my occasional cameos. He was a role model.

Also, we could name vacuumslayer’s bebe Vera.

deployer of the many varieties of weapon upon the good ship Serenity

Oh… then I retract my exclamation. Just goes to show, though, that you gotta watch those shamblers like a hawk. One minute, you’re trading good-natured ribbing, the next they’re equating you to some sort of wingnut writer, next thing you know they’re noshing on yer grey matter.

“It is a little worrisome”, you folks here appear to be possible closet conservatives…

you know, some conservatives are funny such as Mr. Baldwin. His brother Alec

is a possible closet conservative. You can’t work in Hollywood unless you show that

you can make a lot of money and still pretend to hate it and also be able to

french kiss Hugo Chavass.

And what the fuck is with the third-grade troll?

Somebody talk to the union and have them do something about this.

Or child services. He can’t be old enough to be up this late.

I’ve been waiting years for this chance…

Piefilter!

justyouandme – it seems as though the third grade “troll” and “troll”

isn’t a bad thing, is the only one making any sense here tonight.

Besides, we are all family here, you all are like a bunch of nutty

kinderbarfen sisters and brothers. Try to be nice or you will all

have to go to bed early without your sugary snacks.

WC, no that’s Steven Baldwin.

Sadly, No. I had to look him up because I don’t follow actors and I was shocked at what I found.

I like pie!

And what the fuck is with the third-grade troll?

the Sadly No JanusTroll has gone katty-wampus.

No, really. I do.

I’m having some right now.

you know, some conservatives are funny such as Mr. Baldwin

How many times must I remind you that looks aren’t everything?

Snowflakebrain – You are welcome. We will be disemvoweling

YOUR comments – hello to greasemonkey.

What kind of pie?

Isn’t it cute the way the troll touches on every little talking point. It knows all the blast faxes by heart!

Okay, I took another pass at a synopsis / treatment for the epic SN mega-blockbuster, freely adapting the storyline from the children’s story Three Billy Goat’s Gruff.

But I had to abandon it: The Troll under the bridge wasn’t working at all. To begin with, he wasutterly ignoranant even the simplest fundemenatals of correct usage and punctuation. Indeed, all he really had going for him was his lethal Comma Splice. Sadly, the Troll was so slow, stupid, and inept that he couldn’t do any damage at all. If you’ve got no Troll, the whole story collapses

But I’ve got another seed: Dystopian future. What was formerly Oklahoma is invaded by violent weirdos and crazies–the Sadlynauts–under their evil leader, Sharia Law. (I’m thinking Tina Turner for the role in my head, but we’ll have to cast younger. Any ideas?)

I don’t follow actors

It has long been my experience that it is better to follow actors than to let one (or more) get behind you.

M. Bouffant – you are right, just because a person is ugly and intelligent, should

not be the way to judge her or him. It is that which is within you that really matters.

Nice hair there Bouffant.

White Phowder – agreed, these trolls have got to go, it’s ruining the good

Karma that we all have going here – Namaste.

Chloë Sevigny as Sharia Law. I’m already frightened.

the Sadly No JanusTroll has gone katty-wampus.

Points for “katty-wampus.”

This gibbering drool-faucet makes “Address my post, libs” sound coherent.

Has Tintin not been paying the troll service on time or something? Used to be we at least got idiots who could occasionally form complete sentences.

Badger time.

What kind of pie?

Punkin, what else?

Sadly, the Troll

I smell a Christmas special!

Also, stand-in for Tina Turner: Grace Jones.

I love punkin pie. Dint have any this year. Must remedy that.

Okay, y’all. It’s time for Anthony to put me in the cornfield.

Now look, you “smart” guys, a little secret, people do get paid to

rattle your chains to get the comment count higher – surprise.

Have a nice week, punkadodaldoos. : )

William Hung will actually be performing an “interpretive dance”, modeled on the logic and clarity of taint-licking LiptonTEA’s verbal effluent. I predict the judges will be astounded by William’s personal courage and bravery, although points will be deducted for performing his “solo” dance accompanied by a pre-deceased hairless Vietnamese potbellied pig.

STOP MAKING FUN OF TRIG.

Anyway you seem to enjoy overlooking

all of the good that Corporations have done for the world.

No, the only thing I enjoy overlooking is the opposing team, collapsed in bitter defeat, watering the gridiron with their blood and tears as I stand over them and laugh. Overlooking all the good that Corporations have done for the world is just what I do to pass the time between Saturdays.

Wuups again! Typos. Dropped words. Skippy, my editor, was way too stoned when he let that last post go through! (Or maybe whatever the Troll is suffering from is contagious!) I’m off to take a shower to think about dystopian Oklahoma and how to fit Inhofe and Coburn into the storyline.

But it’s got a happy ending: The Native American Tribes end up with the whole state! Sharia Law and the Sadlynauts ride off in a glorious sunset, heading south for Texas. (I like the sequel potential, too!)

On a more seriouser note, just finished reading the NYT summary of what was leaked by Wikileaks. I have to say that I don’t approve. Of the leak that is. Don’t see what purpose that sort of broad spectrum leaking serves.

Oh, and GibletTEA: look at the comment counts where you didn’t troll. They’re better than any five wingnut sites, asshole. You aren’t being paid except in RushBucks, redeemable at any Dominican whorehouse.

Inspiration while the shower warms up. I’ve got the perfect director for the project: Sam Peckinpah. Except that he’s dead.

Sam Peckinpah. Except that he’s dead.

Not a problem.

I gotta warn against Zombie unions. They’ll rip your lungs out, Jim

I always chuckle at the idea that the Wingnut Wurlitzer doles pennies out to idiots to post comments at sites like Sadly. To what purpose? Demoralize liberals? We seem to kind of thrive on them, actually. To derail threads? I don’t think Sadly has had railed threads since I started bothering the threads. To annoy us? Badger filters and disemvoweling work. To accentuate the idiocy of the opposition? MISSION ACCOMPLISHED, SHRUBBY!

WC, there are a lot of things I don’t approve of. I’m on the fence about the leaks for the moment. I am, however, extremely amused that a government that thinks it’s just peachy to wiretap any and all of its citizens for any or no reason at all gets that sort of whiny when information flows the other way.

If they don’t want it leaked, they need to protect it better. Apparently, that feeling of invincibility that comes from a lack of prosecution and a powerless populace doesn’t extend to the reality of lax security.

Sam Peckinpah. Except that he’s dead.

I believe he should exec- produce. Sam Raimi should direct. Maybe some guest work by Tobe Hooper.

Tagfail courtesy of liberTEA. And FREEEDUM.

On a more seriouser note, just finished reading the NYT summary of what was leaked by Wikileaks. I have to say that I don’t approve. Of the leak that is. Don’t see what purpose that sort of broad spectrum leaking serves.

Knowing history is good, knowing history sooner is gooder.

Don’t see what purpose that sort of broad spectrum leaking serves.

The truth hurts. As good a reason as any.

OTb funny

I was looking for the Dead String Quartet clip as the obvious soundtrack for S,N! Teh Show. This has some funny in it though. I guess the Young Republicans haven’t changed much in thirty years.

LiberTEA thinks
he’s so great
because he
writes on a
WebTV. But
I am writing
on a WebTV
while playing
Tetris in an
other window.

Most men who are sexually attracted to trolling liberal blogs can and do indulge their promiscuous urges with little or no restraint; i.e., it’s “party time” all the time. My wife and I watched a sad documentary about AIDS a few years ago.

Three Billy Goat’s Gruff.

Where’s Evil VS when you need her?

Seriously OT, but access to the whole blogspot.com corner of the bloggosphere turns out to be blocked by Chinese URLs.
On the other hand, checking in at Sadly.com is no problem at all.
Evidently S,N! poses to threat to the stability of the Chinese government.

Must be a NZ thing, because I was just able to reach blogspot. I’m sure the invasion will go smoothly.

Where’s Evil VS when you need her?

Reporting for duty…

BTW, for director, I vote Tim Burton…natch. (If you know my art, you know why.)

Though zrm made a bold choice in Sam Raimi and Tobe Hooper. As a horror aficionado, I heartily approve. I’d take it one more (surreal) step further and go with Dario Argento.

BTW, this thread smells like stale cupcakes. I blame me because I like to use shower gels that smell like foodand LiberTEA, who just fucking stinks.

Oooh… S, N! movie soundtrack: Ry Cooder.

Quick question: if I call up the salon and ask if they have an opening for a facial, does that sound dirty?

BTW, I just went and stalked visited the HELL out of several S,N bloggers this morning.

YOU’RE WELCOME.

Oh yeah. I’m drinkin’ coffee.

Ya know, if nobody plays with me, I’ll be forced to play with myself.

EIGHTEEN MINUTES, I TELL YOU!!!!

And several months.

Ya know, if nobody plays with me, I’ll be forced to play with myself.

Dood, you LIKE an audience for that…

LiberTEA will be played by William NotHung.

FTFY

I always chuckle at the idea that the Wingnut Wurlitzer doles pennies out to idiots to post comments at sites like Sadly.

Really. I mean, it’s not like this is a serious political blog and while we may discuss things seriously even heatedly, eventually it’s all PENIS and POOP anyways…

Nice characterizations of shamblers, biters, and the fucking Lower East Side hipsters

Wait…they’re not the same (not)people?

I take actor to be a womanising intellectual like Goldblum

Except I can act a bit. Oh, and I hate wearing glasses on the screen.

It used to be that you could distinguish a good Goldblum movie (like Jurassic Park) from a bad one (Silverado) by whether he had his contacts in or his glasses on.

Buckaroo Banzai totally fucked this trope, tho. He wore both at various points.

But this was enough to convince me to go with Baldrick.

You do continually come up with clever plans.

Plus, the dishes seem to get undone…

Who’s Vanity? Is she good looking?

If you like slutty hiphop girls from the 80’s and don’t mind about their sexual history.

uh…Leslie Neilson just died. Probably nothing to do with us, but we should be careful.

I will be played by Pat Sajak.

If you like slutty hiphop girls from the 80?s and don’t mind about their sexual history.

I deny those rumours! She was a virgin when I snuck out in the morning!

Fucking revenge…how does it work?