How did we get here again?

Can someone please remind me why the Republicans are portrayed in the press as the party that respects and is in touch with the common heartland American? I mean, look at this:

Cheney apologizes for West Virginia inbreeding joke

Vice President Dick Cheney threw a verbal insult at West Virginians on Monday, but quickly apologized.

Talking about his family roots and how he’s distantly related to Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama, the vice president noted that he had Cheneys on both sides of his family.
“And we don’t even live in West Virginia,” Cheney quipped. “You can say those things when you’re not running for re-election.”

West Virginia Gov. Joe Manchin, a Democrat, quickly asked Cheney to apologize.

“I truly cannot believe that any vice president of the United States, regardless of their political affiliation, would make such a derogatory statement about my state or any state for that matter,” he said.
On Capitol Hill, Cheney’s comment was denounced by both Democrats and Republicans.

“This is exactly the type of stereotyping that we don’t need from our elected officials,” said Rep. Shelley Moore Capito, R-W.Va. “It’s disrespectful, and it’s certainly not funny. … As a proud state, I can say we are disappointed.”

Sen. Robert Byrd, D-W.Va., blasted Cheney, saying that for a vice president to openly display “such contempt and astounding ignorance toward his own countrymen” was an insult to all Americans.
“Now that he or the administration he represents no longer needs their vote, Mr. Cheney apparently feels that he is now free to mock and belittle the people of West Virginia,” Byrd said.

Again, this is not a mere gaffe: Cheney and his ideological cohorts have sincere contempt for anyone who isn’t rich and white like they are. How have they been able to get away with it for so long?


UPDATE Oh, the humanity:

Cheney & West Virginia [Kathryn Jean Lopez]

Honest question. I’m from New York City so I have no idea. If you’re from Wyoming, you can make jokes about West Virginia, can’t you? I know a New Yorker absolutely can’t make jokes about West Virginia. And I know a West Virginian can make jokes about a New Yorker. But if you’re from Wyoming, aren’t you — if you’re name isn’t Cheney, at least — part of the normal-American club and it’s all good?

But remember – K-Lo’s a heartland lovin’ populist!

(Via.)

 

Comments: 201

 
 
 

because we’re all stupid fucking inbreeds, naturally.

 
 

Shut up, that’s why.

 
 

It’s because dumb and greedy think that sniffing around at the feet of the upper class might yield a crumb or two for them.

 
 

A press corps who’s far more interested in living in interesting times so they can publish their hagiographic memoir than in those stupid peons, the American people, and whatever the hell it is they want.

 
 

How have they been able to get away with it for so long?

…because they own the newspapers and radio stations and run the schools?

 
 

I understand that the Vice-President apologized by telling the citizens of West Virginia to go fuck themselves.

 
 

How have they been able to get away with it for so long?

That’s the kind of elitist, “rhetorical” question that shows how out of touch you Democrats are. Now, who wants to watch me kill a fag?

 
 

What’s the problem, he just told a state full of people that they fuck their own sisters. I mean, if he had done something like order orange juice at a diner, then you could make a case for elitism

 
 

Come on Brad, whom among us doesn’t like a good hillbilly joke?

I mean, sure, I’m not a politician, but what’s the outrage here really? Since when are we supposed to pretend that Cletus jokes aren’t funny?

 
fortran trousers
 

Contempt? Sure.

Look at his energy policy, his directing of war profits to his buddies, his attitude to the war dead, constitution-as-asswipe, etc. If only this “gaffe” was the worst disrespect Cheney has shown.

 
 

Okay, I promise to get all outraged-like next time someone mentions Buttfuck, Arkansas.

 
 

The fact is, this sort of joke goes over spendidly in The Heartland, and you’re an elitist elite for thinking otherwise. I know this, because I’m in touch with the Average American. I’m such a great journalist.

 
 

Far be it from me to defend The Big Dick, but (being a Virginian) I have been known to make West Virginia jokes at an average rate of two a week.

And when I saw the interviews in which West Virginians calmly explained that they didn’t vote for Obama because “we have enough trouble with those people as it is,” I felt entirely justified in my ridicule habits.

Judge me if you will.

 
 

“You can say those things when you’re not running for re-election.”

Every single time the conservatives whine about political correctness, we should tell them to ignore it. Let them call the American people stupid, shiftless, hairy, gay, inbred creeps. They can knock themselves out doing it. Why let them pretend to be victims instead of revealing them to be the jerks they are?

 
 

Geraldine Ferraro will tell you: he’s able to get away with it because he’s black.

 
 

I have been known to make West Virginia jokes at an average rate of two a week.

You don’t represent those people in government. A simple matter of professionalism. If I’m a union shop steward I don’t let it be known that the boys in the warehouse are a bunch of cock-biting whores.

 
 

At least they aren’t breeding with animals like those fish-frog fuckers up in Innsmouth, Massachusetts.

 
 

I wonder how many people condemning his joke are the same people who attributed Obama’s loss to racism.

 
 

It’s because dumb and greedy think that sniffing around at the feet of the upper class might yield a crumb or two for them.

I think Travis is right. Some of those dumb and greedy foot-sniffers inhabit the upper ranks of the press corps, which doesn’t help.

 
 

The fact is, we have freedom of speach, all of us, not just liberals. Why does Cheney have to apologize for a joke. liberals need to not be so easily offended by everything, should just do what we do in the heartland, shrug, go back to work and pray. At least he is not an out of touch eleitist like Obama.

 
 

It’s pretty amazing that these swine can pass themselves off as “of the people” and “in touch with heartland values” when time after time they display their contempt for such values.

Off the top of my head:

Foley chasing Congressional pages
Larry Craig doing the bathroom tapdance
David Vitter
Newt Gingrich, divorcing his wife while she was in the hospital
The Keating 5
Iran-Contra

God, I could go on but why bother? Outrage seems so…weak as a response.

 
 

Gary Ruppert said,
what we do in the heartland

fuck yeah the heartland

 
 

You’re all geared up in water ski accoutrement.

Are you gonna put on the biker jacket?

 
 

Republicans insult the “Heartland” and work against their interests, so they’re the Party of Heartland Values.

Republicans drive the economy into the dirt, so they’re the Party of Fiscal Responsibility.

Republicans wage an illegal and stupid war that they can’t win, so they’re the Party that Wins Wars.

Republicans get caught in a wide variety of sexual scandals, getting caught in enough sleazy shenanigans to open their own 24-hours-a-day S&M gay donkey show, so they’re the Party of Morality.

 
 

If I’m a union shop steward I don’t let it be known that the boys in the warehouse are a bunch of cock-biting whores.

If. you say? How hypothetical is that statement? Any good looking ones? Where is the shop?

 
 

Scott said,

June 3, 2008 at 19:24

Republicans insult the “Heartland” and work against their interests, so they’re the Party of Heartland Values.

Republicans drive the economy into the dirt, so they’re the Party of Fiscal Responsibility.

Republicans wage an illegal and stupid war that they can’t win, so they’re the Party that Wins Wars.

Republicans get caught in a wide variety of sexual scandals, getting caught in enough sleazy shenanigans to open their own 24-hours-a-day S&M gay donkey show, so they’re the Party of Morality.

Republicans completely fail at virtually everything and are sore losers, so they’re the Party that always wins elections.

 
 

The Right is in touch with the heartland like a coyote is in touch with bunny country.

 
 

On the (far) right: Murdoch and company.

On the near right: Donald Graham and Pinch Sulzberger.

All of the above: billionaires.

Any questions?

 
 

Travis Disaster said,

June 3, 2008 at 19:20

fuck yeah the heartland

Sort of makes you wonder what anthropologists 3,000-4,000 years from now will think when they unearth that coffin.

 
 

I wonder how many people condemning his joke are the same people who attributed Obama’s loss to rampant incest amongst West Virginians.

 
 

But, but…Heartland authority David Brooks says if Applebee’s had a salad bar, Obama wouldn’t fit in there.

 
 

Yep. Nothing says funny like incestuous hillbillies, as Al Capp knew.
http://www.lil-abner.com/dogpatch.html#dogpatch

 
 

PSSST! HEY! DAVID! Come close. Um…Applebees doesn’t have salad bars. If you’re going to use this as a vehicle to test someone’s folksiness, at least know what the hell you’re talking about. Okay, bud?

Bwahaha!

Brooks should NEVER be allowed to live this down.

 
 

Blue Buddha said,
June 3, 2008 at 19:39
Sort of makes you wonder what anthropologists 3,000-4,000 years from now will think when they unearth that coffin.

I believe it will be along the lines of “How is babby formed?”

 
not even an mba
 

Well, that’s a pretty good round-up of outrage you’ve got there. Here’s the short answer:[sweeping generalization mode] people who vote Republican like this sort of shit. Your racists and bigots and homophobes and religous intolerants all vote GOP. [/sweeping generalization mode]

It’s the inclusivity of hate. Strict muslims vote Republican because that’s the best way to stick it to TEH GHEY, while gay but otherwise vanilla folk are all quaking in their boots at the thought of brown people. They all want strong personalities who are willing to slap the PC folk around a bit.

OTOH, Dems are pathologically a-feared of offending. If only Barry had said “Yeah, I called ’em bitter. There’s plenty of folk right there in the heartland that are bitter. After the past eight years, it’s no wonder.”

The reason you never hear about Republican candidates alienating a demographic (but instead embracing the base) isn’t only because our media is a sick and broken thing. It’s just been so long since a “Fuck You” type with a D after his name has really made an impression.

But that’s just my take on it.

 
 

I wonder how many people condemning his joke are the same people who attributed Obama’s loss to rampant incest amongst West Virginians.

Because Cheney said it: zero.

 
 

Why does Cheney have to apologize for a joke.

I’m with Mr Ruppert on this one. West Virginia should apologize for being shot in the face.

 
 

Because there are plenty of asshat white folks that get off on race, religion, and revenue. The 3 Rs. Hate you some brown skin folks. Hate anyone that isn’t a christian, or doesn’t follow the teachings of hate from the bible. Gotta hate you some queers. Finally, gotta hate anybody that is getting a free ride. That is unless it is me, me, me!

 
not even an mba
 

Also, WTF is Cheney doing outside of his undisclosed location? DN-acon ’08 is like only two months away, we’ve gotta start ratcheting up the terror alerts. I suspect we’re at Level Fuschia (strong possibility of homo-suicide-fashion-bombers).

 
 

I grew up in WV, and let me say in Cheney’s defense, the state has a very small pool of (a) last names (b) facial features (c) genes. It’s not like he just made up the ‘inbred’ slur out of thin air.

 
not even an mba
 

I wonder what proportion of Jeff Foxworthy fans have asked why they’re allowed to call each other n—–?

 
 

I just took a drive around the Xcel Center at lunchtime. People are starting to line up for the Obama rally and the press tents are set up across the street. There’s definitely a nice buzz going in St. Paul today, despite the rain. It’ll be nuts by the time I get off work (there’s also a big high school graduation ceremony right next door at 5:30pm).

 
 

The stereotype of hillbillies being inbred is racist and owes its origins to America’s fondness for kicking people when they’re down. If a large number of black people are poverty-stricken, it’s their fault because they are immoral and sub-human, and not racism according to these fucktards. If a large number of people in Appalachia suffer from ricketts, it’s not because of malnutrition (you know, the real cause) but because of inbreeding. It’s just another kind of racist, sadistic bullshit and Dickhead Cheney needs to fuck right off.

 
not even an mba
 

Oh, BTW to reinforce my point at 19:49,
If your actually read the linked article you’ll find that the apology was issued by Lea Anne McBride. So, big surprise, Cheney didn’t apologize for shit. And the spokesperson’s apology was along the “I’m sorry you were offended” line. When’s the last time a Democrat had this type of cojones?

 
 

It’s the inclusivity of hate.

I think we do have to make a distinction between “inbred WV” stereotypes and racism, homophobia or other kinds of “hate.” Yes, it’s disrespectful, and it is the antithesis of politic (as distinguished from political) behavior for the VP to make such a joke, but it’s not the same — and I submit not as bad as — all the real hate speech that gets posted, spewed or otherwise injected into public discourse every day. The latter is deserving of outrage. This? A snicker at how ham-fisted and stupid it was for Cheney to say it, but not much more.

 
 

“Again, this is not a mere gaffe: Cheney and his ideological cohorts have sincere contempt for anyone who isn’t rich and white like they are.”

I knew what you meant of course, and I agree completely with the point. But just to be slightly pedantic, this is a gaffe — a gaffe being defined as saying the truth (or what you perceive to be the truth) in a setting where that statement would not be considered socially acceptable or appropriate.

Actually this Cheney quote is a pure example of a gaffe, as opposed to just regular “dumb things” said by politicians every day, which are labeled as gaffes by the chittering doofuses in the media.

 
 

the state has a very small pool of (a) last names (b) facial features ( c) genes.

You’d get a big deja vu if you came to my state, then. I’m also used to having my state made fun of at the national / international level – plenty of that during the 2002 Olympics, f’rinstance – and it doesn’t bother me much. RB’s point about professionalism is well made, though; that’s not how statesmen are supposed to talk about us wholesome salt-of-the-Earth (or Lake) types.

 
 

Look, West Virginia is a lovely state. But let’s face it: dudes fuck their sisters over there.

 
 

A snicker at how ham-fisted and stupid it was for Cheney to say it, but not much more.

I am sick and tired of how these snooty sophisticates from Wyoming lord it over us.

 
 

Three cheers for that Edison guy!

 
not even an mba
 

Dan Someone,
Excellent point. People aren’t rounding up rednecks and stomping them, or spray painting death threats on their double-wides. That is indeed an important distinction.

 
not even an mba
 

Fucking Edison and his god damn DC. Listen Tommy of Menlo Park, you had one good idea – the corporate research team. Well, to be fair, in terms of technological advancement, it was a fucking amazing idea. But the only other thing you were right about was that you never really understood electricity.

 
 

Headline coming soon: Joke Victim Apologizes to Cheney.

 
 

Wow. Brooks actually said this?

Obama’s problem is he doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who can go into an Applebee’s salad bar and people think he fits in naturally there.

Okaaay:

1) Yeah, as noted, Applebee’s doesn’t have a salad bar. I knew that, and I’ve eaten in Applebee’s like twice in my life. Way to stay in touch, Bobozo.
2) He doesn’t? Why? Despite all rages to the contrary, Obama seems like an average guy. Really, he does. These people’s beloved Mittens Romney…now that was someone who didn’t seem like he fit in. But anyway…
3) WHO CARES? Why is someone bringing up this idiotic argument in TWO THOUSAND AND EIGHT, when we’ve had 8 years of President He’ll-Have-A-Beer-With-Me and all that this has entailed? Are you serious, Bobozo? Are you serious. You cannot be serious. You cannot be this intellectually lazy, this creatively bankrupt, this outright stupid. Can you?

I wouldn’t want to have a beer with FDR, but…know what? Screw it. Let this pudgy war-mongering coward spout this line forever and ever. Reason and logic have no place in his worldview.

 
 

Edison also had a really good short statement: “Religion is all bunk.”

 
 

Look at this dead elephant! LOOK AT IT! You see what AC does? For God’s sake think of the children.

 
 

Come on Brad, whom among us doesn’t like a good hillbilly joke?

Those of us who aren’t the Vice President of the United States.

 
 

I understand that the Vice-President apologized by telling the citizens of West Virginia that he meant Tennessee Kentucky Southeast Ohio North Carolina Georgia Newfoundland.

 
 

Leaving aside the stupidity of choosing the chief executive on the basis of how laid-back they might seem, why would you want to have a beer with a dry drunk? I don’t care how “elitist” and Lurch-like Kerry seems, or how, um, smart Al Gore seems — either of them could at least drink a beer or two without waking up six months later in a Mexican hospital completely bald and clutching a Yale pennant.

 
 

I’d have a beer with FDR. Fuck, yeah!

 
 

I’d have a beer with George Clooney. Therefore he should be president, and whatever else he wants.

I imagine if Cheney had his way Satan would be president, and they would have a running bet to see who can make George look like a bigger fool.

 
not even an mba
 

More Edison
In 1902, agents of Thomas Edison bribed a theater owner in London for a copy of A Trip to the Moon by Georges Méliès. Edison then made hundreds of copies and showed them in New York City. Méliès received no compensation. He was counting on taking the film to US and recapture the huge cost of it by showing it throughout the US when he realized it has already been showing in the US by Edison. This bankrupted Méliès…
Edison’s favourite movie was The Birth of a Nation.

Fucking asshat. Fuck him with an Electrified Zombie Elephant.

 
 

Of all the candidates, I would have most wanted to have a beer and an Applebee’s salad with Mike Gravel. I also didn’t vote for him, because I’m not a moron.

 
 

I’d have a beer with Truman.

Hell, I’d split a couple of cases with the guy, and after he passed out I’d use his phone to recall Enola Gay.

Sometimes you just have to fuck with history.

 
 

What can I say? I’m an island.

I mean, harrumph, I take great umbrage, etc., etc.

 
 

It would have been great to do a number on Nixon. Get him drunk (no problem), shove him in the trunk of a Cadillac, and he wakes up in Tiajuana, married to a goat. Or, even worse, Mickey Kaus.

 
not even an mba
 

I’d like to have a beer with Dennis Kucinich’s wife.

 
 

I’d like to have a beer with George W. Bush.

 
A Bottle of Beer
 

Gimme a break. The only way I’d be seen with Bush is if I were broken over his face.

Hic!

 
not even an mba
 

Id like to have a beer.

 
not even an mba
 

Even that uppity one, up one.

 
 

Guys, stop thinking small. You’d be having a snort of coke if you were with Bush.

 
 

The former Premier of Alberta was a beer lover. While Mayor of Calgary he would spend office hours in a fairly divey hotel pub near city hall pissing it up with the regulars.

It all came to a head when, as premier, he stumbled into a government-funded homeless shelter, throwing money on the floor and berating the occupants for being unemployed.

He tearfully apologized the next day and promised to scale back the booze. This incident caused about zero political damage to ‘teflon’ Ralph Klein, man of the people.

 
Robert Frost, writing to David Brooks
 

The witch that came (the withered hag)
To wash the steps with pail and rag,
Was once the beauty Abishag,

The picture pride of Hollywood.
Too many fall from great and good
For you to doubt the likelihood.

Die early and avoid the fate.
Or if predestined to die late,
Make up your mind to die in state.

Make the whole stock exchange your own!
If need be occupy a throne,
Where nobody can call you crone.

Some have relied on what they knew;
Others on simply being true.
What worked for them might work for you.

No memory of having starred
Atones for later disregard,
Or keeps the end from being hard.

Better to go down dignified
With boughten friendship at your side
Than none at all. Provide, provide!

Also, you’re a lazy dope.

 
not even an mba
 

Okay, enough with your fantasies about being alone in a room with W and a ready supply of glass or substances where fatal overdoses have been known to happen. Dennis Kucinich’s wife!

 
 

This is good news…for Republicans.

 
 

Did Cheney just admit he’s a result of inbreeding? This might explain some of his defects as a human being.

 
 

I wish we could all agree that we should hate Cheney on his ample record of violence, illegality and horror and not his lame sense of humor.

 
Malfunctioning David Brooks Robot
 

Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American Suburban Class Bad News For Democrats Average American

 
 

Wouldn’t have minded having a beer with Herbert Hoover. Of course, it was the middle of Prohibition…

 
not even an mba
 
 

Rickets?

 
 

I’d like to have a beer with a malfunctioning robot…

mikey

 
not even an mba
 

Sure it’s pre-Portlanding, but I didn’t see it until now, and I thought that others may have missed the Giant Pill Bugs.

 
 

I wish we could all agree that we should hate Cheney on his ample record of violence, illegality and horror and not his lame sense of humor.

It’s like a vast smorgasbord of hate and this is the jello salad.

 
 

Edison also had a really good short statement: “Religion is all bunk.”

That was actually Henry Ford, I think. “Religion is bunk.” I remember it being quoted by Mustapha Mond in “Brave New World” as a sacred pronouncement by His Holy Ford.

 
not even an mba
 

Dick: I’m in ur tubes, disparaging ur cousin-humpin’
WV: Oh, swain, blaggard, thoust of vile tongue and disparaging demeanor. Where are my pearls?
Flack: ROFL, jk. Dick loves him some cousin humpin’, least screwing over some cousins. Send angry e-mails to DNC.
Dick: LOLZ, uze inbred hicks got no choice. What, like u gonna vote for a black man? gg l00s3rzz!!!
WV: Shucks, he’s got us there don’t he Jim-Bob.

 
 

Obama would seem totally out of place around Burger King’s fondue pots.

 
 

I heard somewhere that RB is a shop Stuart.
Bloody elitist Jacobites. Out of touch with the concerns of ordinary Scotsmen.

 
 

Obama would seem totally out of place around the Baskin Robbins hors d’oeuvre tray.

 
 

Out of touch with the concerns of ordinary Scotsmen.

The girls in the steno pool are all haggis.

 
 

But remember – K-Lo’s a heartland lovin’ populist!

in this instance “heartland” is a type of pie

 
 

I would love to have a beer with Melies.

THAT would be awesome.

 
 

I believe Henry Ford actually said (or was reported to have said), “HISTORY is bunk”. And since he undeniably did give the nation “The International Jew” and “The Protocols of the Elders of Zion”, it would be fitting if he did say it. But perhaps the Great Gazoogle knows for sure (I will check).

 
 

Obama was out of place at Uno’s foie gras bar. Or he wasn’t. Whichever is central to my point.

 
 

Here’s Ford’s full quote:

“History is more or less bunk. It’s tradition. We don’t want tradition. We want to live in the present, and the only history that is worth a tinker’s damn is the history that we make today.” (Chicago Tribune, 1916).

 
not even an mba
 

Bobo: I is Viktodor VON DOOMSchlingen!!! Ph33r me!
not_Bobo: WTF is it now?
Bobo: Dr. DOOM will Spele end of primary campaign HUBRIS!!!!
not_Bobo: WTF – Dr. Doom, enemy of hubris? What comic books have you been reading?
Bobo: Check it, he won less than half of the past 13 primaries!
not_Bobo: WTF, you’re claiming that argument now that it looks like Hillary’s done with it? Because it’s not that great an argument.
Bobo: Nonono. See Barry’s an elitist, out of touch with the working class American. McCain’s gonna wipe the floor with him.
not_Bobo: The Admiral’s son? The married a filthy rich heiress candidate? Fifty bucks an hour McCain?
Bobo: And also, the Democrat plan to paint McCain as Bush III ain’t gonna work. Rush Limbaugh said so.
not_Bobo: WTF am I doin still reading this? Big Pharma is your source for determining what’s factually accurate? Holy fucking shit. Please tell me this is a parody piece.

 
Reginald Perrin
 

Ms. Lopez has misplaced her copy of the rules, so here we go, for her and the rest of the uninformed:

1.

 
 

part of the normal-American club

What was it Groucho said? “I don’t care to belong to a club that accepts people like K-Lo as members”?

 
 

Obama would never have a beer at an Applebee’s because everybody knows that negroes are afraid of apples and bees. And they only drink malt liquor.

 
reginald perrin
 

1. If you are from New York you may make fun of people from New Jersey.
2. If you are from New Jersey you may make fun of people from Connecticut.
3. If you are from Illinois you may make fun of people from Wisconsin or Indiana.
4. If you are from New Mexico you may make fun of people from Texas, but people from Texas may make fun of people from Oklahoma and Louisiana.
5. If you are from North Carolina you may make fun of people from South Carolina, and vice versa.
6. If you are from North Dakota or South Dakota you may all make fun of each other.
7. If you are from West Virginia you may make fun of people from Virginia, but only on odd-numbered days and both of you can make fun of people from Kentucky or Arkansas, but only on alternating days.
8. If you are from Florida, everyone else gets to make fun of you.
9. If you are from Manhattan south of 96th Street you get to make fun of everyone and they all get to hate you behind your back.
I hope this clears things up for Ms. Lopez.

 
not even an mba
 

The K-Lo update is beautiful. It may lack the Kitchell elegance and brevity, but it’s a strong contender for bitchslap of the week. Kinda like:

K-Lo: How come they can call each other niggers inbred hicks? Must be because Cheney can’t get no breaks.
Appalachian Pastor: No.

 
 

“I heard somewhere that RB is a shop Stuart.”

Well at least he isn’t a house Stuart.

Or a field Stuart.

 
not even an mba
 

Oh wait. RB, was your Bush beer comment related to him being a recovering alcoholic? Ohhh, that’s subtle.

 
not even an mba
 

Or a field Stuart

or a Little, Stuart.

 
Emperor U.S.A. (the naked truth)
 

Far be it from me to defend The Big Dick, but (being a Virginian) I have been known to make West Virginia jokes at an average rate of two a week.

And when I saw the interviews in which West Virginians calmly explained that they didn’t vote for Obama because “we have enough trouble with those people as it is,” I felt entirely justified in my ridicule habits.

Judge me if you will.

What she said. Fine, give Cheney hell just on principle, but don’t try to pretend there’s not several big grains of truth in the stereotype. Come see the place for yourself if you don’t believe it.

Hey, jenniebee, why do West Virginians hump their sheep on the edge of a cliff? So the sheep will push back!

 
 

does actually K-Lo issue forth the thought of political correctness? oh, the humanity indeed

 
 

There used to be an absolutely awesome blog post on the Cracked magazine website titled something along the lines of “An Open Letter from the Office of the Vice-President.”

I am no longer able to find this blog post anywhere. The internet Wayback machine does not have it. I think this blog post is Cheney’s Nikolai Yezhov, erased from history for being politically unsuitable.

At any rate, the point of the completely fictional, but nonetheless to my eyes and ears completely accurate, open letter from the office of the vice president was that Cheney does not care, and does not have to care.

Nobody can touch him. He has the legal system wrapped around his pinky, he is better at manipulating the wheels of the most powerful government on earth than anyone else in recent memory, he is already two heart attacks past what anyone would have expected him to survive, and he can throw any legal action taken against him into such a spin as to not wring itself out until years after he is gone. So if he wanted to fornicate with a goat while strutting down the steps of the Lincoln Memorial dressed in a feather boa that would make Edie Bouvier jealous, he is going to do it. Everybody else can fuck off.

I really wish I could find that blog post.

 
 

… the only history that is worth a tinker’s damn is the history that we make up today.

Fixed.

(Is “Fixed.” one of those things that’s not politically correct anymore?)

 
 

I dunno, Hoosier, I just write what’s funny to me and let the rest worry about what’s passe’

 
 

Go fuck yourself.

And now my friend Harry would like to apologize for getting his face in the way of my gun.

 
 

You know, I’m starting to think that this K-Lo lady might not be too smart.

 
 

Lesly said,
June 3, 2008 at 19:16

I wonder how many people condemning his joke are the same people who attributed Obama’s loss to racism.

I’ll assume we can attribute your loss to brain damage.

 
 

(Is “Fixed.” one of those things that’s not politically correct anymore?)

I don’t think so, if by “not politically correct” you mean “is a net-cliché beaten beyond death into compost.” IMO the fixing does take some cleverness.

We’ll see what the other cliché-cops have to say.

…you did ask.

 
Captain Obvious
 

You know, I’m starting to think that this K-Lo lady might not be too smart.

I was thinking the same thing.

 
 

The fact is, blacks do not work as hard as whites, and break the law more. Is this because they are genetically inferior, or because of cultural issues, does not really matter. We keep giving them welfare money and they keep getting pregnant, selling drugs, and in jail. As long as they only murder each other.

 
 

It’s a big country, folks — just ask David Byrne:

I see the shapes,
I remember from maps.
I see the shoreline.
I see the whitecaps.
A baseball diamond, nice weather down there.
I see the school and the houses where the kids are.
Places to park by the fac’tries and buildings.
Restaunts and bar for later in the evening.
Then we come to the farmlands, and the undeveloped areas.
And I have learned how these things work together.
I see the parkway that passes through them all.
And I have learned how to look at these things and I say,

(CHORUS)

I wouldn’t live there if you paid me.
I couldn’t live like that, no siree!
I couldn’t do the things the way those people do.
I couldn’t live there if you paid me to.

I guess it’s healthy, I guess the air is clean.
I guess those people have fun with their neighbors and friends.
Look at that kitchen and all of that food.
Look at them eat it’ guess it tastes real good.

They grow it in the farmlands
And they take it to the stores
They put it in the car trunk
And they bring it back home
And I say …

(CHORUS)

I say, I wouldn’t live there if you paid me.
I couldn’t live like that, no siree!
I couldn’t do the things the way those people do.
I wouldn’t live there if you paid me to.

I’m tired of looking out the windows of the airplane
I’m tired of travelling, I want to be somewhere.
It’s not even worth talking
About those people down there.

Goo Goo Ga Ga Ga
Goo Goo Ga Ga Ga

 
reginald perrin
 

And as a homosexual-American, may I just say that people named “Dick” and “K-Lo” need to be extra sooper dooper careful about the rules of etiquette with respect to making fun of things. Truly, to be a conservative is to live without a sense of irony. Maimed for life, poor dears.

 
 

Well at least he isn’t a house Stuart.
Or a field Stuart.

They put arugula in their haggis, you know.
Please excuse the lack of tartan jokes.

 
Typical West Virginian
 

I’d like you to meet my wife and sister. She’s the prettiest girl in town (and still has most of her teeth.)

 
 

AP now reporting Obama is over the top in delegate count. Guess this means we can expect Hillary’s concession speech some time in 2010.

 
 

heeheeheheheee YAYS!

Stick THAT in your Iris and smoke it.

 
 

I once got in a barfight in Montana because someone was talking shit about WV, so no Kathryn-Jean, you do not get to make that joke just because you’re from a rural state. I was 18 and very drunk and wouldn’t recommend it.

Incidentally I recently heard about a study that rated WVa as the least average state based on how far it deviated from national norms in terms of age, racial makeup, income etc. etc. so much for the “normal american” thing.

But I have to go screw some relatives and their farm animals now. Then off to get some chitlin’s at Panera.

 
 

“Please excuse the lack of tartan jokes.”

Oh, you’re always Tartan up your jokes.

OK, I think we’ve kilt this topic.

 
 

I’ll assume we can attribute your loss to brain damage.

I’m sure you hope so, SomeNYGuy. And no pun intended.

 
Belligerent Glaswegian*
 

Who’re you callin’ a wee jock, Jimmy?

* Not Lobbey Dosser

 
 

But just to be slightly pedantic, this is a gaffe —

Ahem. Begging your pardon. A gaffe is a mistake or a social mis-step.

When someone deliberately scripts an offensive joke, that is not a gaffe, it’s a deliberate insult.

Cheney was simply revealing the contempt in which he holds ordinary people, specifically those from West Virginia, and his joke was also intended as an insult to Obama.

This wasn’t a gaffe, it was a view inside his twisted soul.

 
 

Lesly said,
June 4, 2008 at 0:43

I’m sure you hope so, SomeNYGuy. And no pun intended.

No pun detected.

 
 

Matthew Yglesias wrote what I thought was a piece of hackery in the recent Atlantic. [I’ll see if it’s available online…] in which he claims that Obama’s saying he’d meet with the baddies was a ‘gaffe’ that turned into a position.

As I sed, hackery.

Also, Scotsmen taste tartan tangy.

 
 

Well, as long as Cheney doesn’t start dissing Charles Elmer Doolin, I’m pretty much “outraged” out.

 
 

Yes, it’s time to get in their faces…

Obama clinches nomination, plans celebration
1 hour ago

Obama arranged a victory celebration in St. Paul, Minn., at the site of this summer’s Republican National Convention — an in-your-face gesture to Sen. John McCain, who will be his opponent in the race to become the nation’s 44th president.

 
 

Electrified Zombie Elephant
Band-name Japanese horror movie of the day.

 
 

PeeJ, either Yglesias stole that from Krauthammer or vice-versa. In either case, it doesn’t reflect well on either of them.

And I thought we’d put plaid to this meme.

 
 

It’s like a vast smorgasbord of hate and this is the jello salad.

Exactly.

The reason it offends any thinking person is that it was gratuitously mean. It’s not like you have a buddy from WV and you tease each other about the states you come from. This was Teh Dick being mean because he can and he likes it.

I thought Nixon was bad. But Dick Cheney is quite possibly the sickest, most twisted fuckhead that America has spawned outside of our famous serial killers.

And he’s killed far more people.

I swear, when I saw that clip on the Daily Show about some morning news person visiting the Cheney home, I almost hallucinated there was blood oozing from the walls.

 
 

How about ” _____ will _____ in 5…4…3…2…”.

Is that played out?

 
 

I just noticed that little Richie Cohen’s WaPo comments page is full of angry white right wingers.

ifthethunderdontgetya wrote:
So many little right wing cowards, typing their insults at the next President of the United States, Barack Obama.

How sad it must be for you.

Ha ha!
~
6/3/2008 8:10:58 PM

The schaden freuds itself.

 
 

How about ” _____ will _____ in 5…4…3…2…”.

That one just doesn’t pay off often enough as the focus is usually too narrow. Maybe if you could game the results a little bit with breadth:

Idiot will add to the thread in 5…4…3…2…

 
 

I just noticed that little Richie Cohen’s WaPo comments page is full of angry white right wingers.

I find reverse-chronology blogs disorienting.

Nice smack, by the way!

 
 

I see RB is tired of being smacked around pwned!1one!!

 
 

Fuck the hearland. If they are so stupid as to vote for the Republitwats who think they are all inbred shit heads then they get what they deserve.

Of course, the heartland is all inbred shit heads so it makes perfect sense.

 
 

Now RB’s gonna bust out the recipies.

Y’all been warned.

 
 

The fact is, black people aren’t very smart or ambitious. I made this statement earlier. Nobody here to challenge my facts and logic? OK then.

 
 

Jeez gary, I thought you were busy watching McSame make a fool of himself…until he was yanked off the toobz for our next president, Barack Obama.

 
 

Now RB’s gonna bust out the recipies.

Dead pets because I’m in a bad mood. But thanks henry!

19 years ago my astute duck died. What she had was a disintegrated throat and if I had the money she would have lived many more weeks. Just this side of Detroit is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When a duck dies that has been twinklingly close to someone here, that duck goes to Rainbow Bridge.

 
 

Only RB would have an ass-toot duck for a pet.

 
 

Take a fucking joke. If it wasn’t Cheney, no one would have a word to say about it.

 
 

If it wasn’t Cheney, no one would have a word to say about it.

Bullshit. Name any other vice-president who wouldn’t get an earful. The guy is not Joe-Bob down at the bait shop he’s the “brains” behind the most dangerous idiot in the country. A little more hate can’t hurt.

 
 

Only RB would have an ass-toot duck for a pet.

Monster!

 
 

the most dangerous idiot in the country.

Said idiot actually being Joe-Bob down at the bait shop, as interpreted by an alcohol and cocaine addled dimwit preppie.

 
slippy hussein toad
 

Take a fucking joke. If it wasn’t Cheney, no one would have a word to say about it.

Cheney is one of those people who I really am not in a giving mood about. He should fall on his fucking knees and beg for his worthless piece of shit self to be forgiven. Not just to the one state that he’s insulted. But to the many thousands who have been slaughtered in the name of his goddamn stock options.

Cheney is one of those people who makes me sad that there’s no such thing as Hell.

 
 

I think we do have to make a distinction between “inbred WV” stereotypes and racism, homophobia or other kinds of “hate.” Yes, it’s disrespectful, and it is the antithesis of politic (as distinguished from political) behavior for the VP to make such a joke, but it’s not the same — and I submit not as bad as — all the real hate speech that gets posted, spewed or otherwise injected into public discourse every day…

No, we don’t. The thesis that poor working-class rural people can be mocked by people who won’t say “chink” in reference to a gap between two boards is (a) elitist in the most offensive sense and (b) yet another reason why West Virginians keep voting for Republicans in opposition to their own best interests. Darth Cheney felt free to “joke” about people who don’t have many opportunities to travel to Hawaii on the government’s money in search of unrelated heiresses to marry (like the current GOP candidate) because, ha ha, who *cares* about Those People’s feelings?

The whole “Oppression comes with a points system, and I (we) shall award the points” meme is an invention of the ruling class to keep the ‘house servants’ and the ‘field hands’ fighting with each other instead of fighting the real enemy — the ruling class. It’s been a great convenience to the courtiers otherwise known as Media Village Idiots, and it’s led directly to the last four months of ugly, hate-ridden, shameful slanging between the two remaining Democratic candidates when they should have been uniting to bitchslap Old John McSame for the craven lifer that he is. For instance, you mention ‘racism’ & ‘homophobia’ as “real hate speech” but don’t include sexism. Presumably an innocent oversite on your totally hate-free part, but the omission leapt right out to my female feminist eye. And, yeah, I *do* get irritated by the sexism of certain Obama supporters, whyever do you ask?

Or, to channel my first response in Jim Webb’s voice: Go blow your “thesis advisor” at the poetry slam, emo boy.

 
 

I swear, when I saw that clip on the Daily Show about some morning news person visiting the Cheney home, I almost hallucinated there was blood oozing from the walls.

It was in the contract that taping didn’t start until Morning News Pod had licked all oozing blood & other bodily fluids from *every inch* of those walls.

 
MileHi Hawkeye
 

If not for the the abundance of sheep, Wyoming would be out-inbreed West Virginia in a heartbeat.

 
 

Aaron the mongoose just died mincingly. I don’t know how she got stuck in that rotten brushed aluminium box. I blame the mangy fingernails.

 
 

I just got home from attempting to go to the Obama rally in St. Paul. I got off the bus right in front of the Xcel center and started following the line to the end. I must have walked 30 blocks and 2 miles in a line that serpentined it’s way around most of downtown St. Paul. It took me half an hour just to find the end of the line (and I was taking as many shortcuts as I could find). Someone said that there were 60,000 people downtown for the rally, but I can’t even begin to verify that number. I should have stayed for the scene but I decided to get home and follow it on the media. Just an incredible incredible turnout. Amazing. Wow.

 
 

well, maybe just 25 blocks

 
MileHi Hawkeye
 

So, who’s playing at the Rally, gbear– Prince, Bob Mould or the Replacements?

 
 

Ok, now that Barack has locked up the nomination should we go ahead and start declaring eternal Democrat control now or wait until the convention?

 
 

I’m an inbred Greek-a-billy. I’m not running for re-election either, so can I say this crap too? Yep, say anything in not running again or if it’s not something you actually ever have to vote on. Gay marriage? Not sure about that…..Gays? Oh, they’re GREAT! Never have to vote (YET) as to whether or not to outlaw the LGBT community, just their marriages. Funny ain’t it?

Birth of a Nation was Edison’s favorite? Interesting. Didn’t know that about the Bros. Melies though. I don’t think The Smashing Pumpkins gave them much more than a mention in that 90s video for the lame song they had out either though. Only us Film School geeks gave a crap.

OK, anyone else think that Obama’s comment there about McCain not respecting his (Obama’s) accomplishments is finally going to get some winger pissed enough to call him “uppity”? Come on, we need bets on that one ever since t4toby brought it up. Or is Toby drunk right now? Heeheehee…..

 
Flappy McScrotum
 

1. If you are from New York you may make fun of people from New Jersey.
2. If you are from New Jersey you may make fun of people from Connecticut.
[ snip ]
8. If you are from Florida, everyone else gets to make fun of you.
9. If you are from Manhattan south of 96th Street you get to make fun of everyone and they all get to hate you behind your back.
I hope this clears things up for Ms. Lopez.

10. If you are from Pennsylvania, you may make fun of people from New Jersey and Delaware.

 
 

MileHi, I have no idea. The only way I was going to get to hear the speech was to come home and hear it on the radio. I would have still been standing outside right now.

 
Ghost of Joe Liebling's Dog
 

“… if you’re name isn’t Cheney …” — KLo

And shes, or she’s, or shes’
their, or there, or they’re
editor?

Color me impressed.

 
MileHi Hawkeye
 

Well, as the Decemberists have taught us, nobody goes to an Obama rally to hear Obama.

 
not even an mba
 

Okay, I’ll start with acknowledging that Anne Laurie totally pwned
No, we don’t. The thesis that poor working-class rural people can be mocked by people who won’t say “chink” in reference to a gap between two boards is (a) elitist in the most offensive sense and (b) yet another reason why West Virginians keep voting for Republicans in opposition to their own best interests…
The whole “Oppression comes with a points system, and I (we) shall award the points” meme is an invention of the ruling class to keep the ‘house servants’ and the ‘field hands’ fighting with each other instead of fighting the real enemy — the ruling class. It’s been a great convenience to the courtiers otherwise known as Media Village Idiots, and it’s led directly to the last four months of ugly, hate-ridden, shameful slanging between the two remaining Democratic candidates when they should have been uniting to bitchslap Old John McSame for the craven lifer that he is.

In my defense, well remember how HAAMs got himself banned for outstanding performance in the field of assholery. Beyond the pale, over the top, not fit for human consumption. Because, you know some people actually died of AIDS, and some people reading this might know one or two poeple who died of AIDS and well, just generally asshole-ish. No one’s died of redneck-ery, well except a handful of Darwin Award winners. Hope this TLDR enough that no one’s noticed how much of a pussy I am.

 
not even an mba
 

As much as I’d love another go at beating Edison’s dead and rotten corpse with the Electrified Zombie Elephant…hey I do love beating the rotting corpse of Edison!
Forget the light bulb (and the fact that at least two other people had already installed working ones) Edison’s real legacy is of course General Electric.
Seriously, fuck that fucker.

 
Malfunctioning Glenn Reynolds Robot
 

I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron! I’m a fucking moron!

 
 

10. If you are from Pennsylvania, you may make fun of people from New Jersey and Delaware.

11. If you’re from Earth, you make make fun of people from Utah.

 
 

Yeah, but all those earth people gonna be sorry some day, right Sam?

 
 

Yeah, but all those earth people gonna be sorry some day, right Sam?

I dunno. I’m thinking of moving there some day – they have a lot of good ideas.

 
Rest of the Planet
 

Don’t worry. When we tell jokes about people from the US, we use foreign languages or even more foreign accents, and then we snigger. You suspect that we’re laughing at you but you can’t quite prove it.

 
not even an mba
 

Zoweee! Obama’s clinched the nomination just in time for the media to start focusing on McCain.
If you only spend twenty odd minutes listening to a clearly senile dottering old idiot trying to connect with anyone or anything while reading a laundry list off a teleprompter…actually, just FFwd to the beautiful sign off.at 21:30. Skipping the godawful speech means you won’t know that this is the ten millionth time he’s delivered the same line, but wow. That’s not a speech McCain believes in.

 
 

My best skiing ideas ever occurred to me at a place called Solitude, southeast of Salt Lake City.

 
 

@D.N. Nation –

Obama’s problem is he doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who can go into an Applebee’s salad bar and people think he fits in naturally there.

Okaaay:

1) Yeah, as noted…

To the list of three items you supply, I’d like to add a fourth: Mr. Brooks, who the hell was your English teacher in high school? I tried to diagram that sentence, and it looks like someone stabbed a stick figure to death with a pair of scissors.

 
 

My best skiing ideas ever occurred to me at a place called Solitude, southeast of Salt Lake City.

I know Solitude well. I don’t ski very much, but it’s a nice place and you can just stay up there in general mountain prettiness for low off-season rates in the summer.

I will concede that the mountain parts – and, hell, even some of the desert parts – of my state are beautiful. As with everywhere else it’s the people that make it an annoying place to live sometimes.

 
not even an mba
 

I mean the best that Michael Maverick-Fluffer Scherer could do was:
“The McCain speech was better written than it was delivered”.

I thought Hil’s best chance to drop out was last Friday when all of America was prepping for the Portlanding and therefore not paying attention. Well played Senator Clinton, this trainwreck of a speech will stink it up enough that you can just slink out the…she’s not quitting? WTF?

 
 

He tearfully apologized the next day and promised to scale back the booze. This incident caused about zero political damage to ‘teflon’ Ralph Klein, man of the people.

Old Ralphie just sums up Alberta & Calgary, what a dick.

Belligerent Glaswegian* said,

We’re not all pie supper boys, you know, some of us are from the ‘burbs…….

 
 

Obama’s problem is he doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who can go into an Applebee’s salad bar and people think he fits in naturally there.

Can I add a fifth item to the list. please?

David Brooks doesn’t know squat about regular folks eating at Applebees. Not one Applebees restaruant has a salad bar. Fail.

http://www.crooksandliars.com/2008/06/03/memo-to-david-brooks-applebees-doesnt-have-a-salad-bar/

 
 

Well the Hillary super-delegate warrantless wiretapping supporting bankruptcy bill loving war voting war funding Bush fellatin’ DINO incumbant Leonard Boswell won the 3rd District Dem primary in Iowa over knew the war was wrong all along Obama supporting peace and poverty activist PAC contribution free all around good guy Ed Fallon.

And my car was totalled today in an accident that was totally not in any way my fault by an uninsured poor guy and all the insurance I’ve been able to afford to carry on my 14 year old long since paid for car is liability. I guess I should be glad I wasn’t hurt because my medically uninsured full time student ass would be laying up in the county hospital right now.

It has not been a good day.

It fucking sucks to be poor in this country. The last thing people in unfortunate circumstances need is assholes like Dick making stupid fucking jokes from their perch on Mt. Olympus when they’ll never have to worry about how they’re going to pay the rent or how they’ll replace a car they’ve had twelve years and was still in really good shape but to the people who decide such things was old with over 200,000 miles and thus is not worth shit. Dick and Lynn and George and Laura will never have to think about these things.

Fuck them and fuck any smug asshole who thinks like them.

 
 

As I was watching McCain’s speech tonight, I was thinking “where have I seen this guy before?” And then it hit me – I saw him running for president back in 1996, when he was calling himself bobdole. Just pitiful.

Now, I think I’ll cruise over to corrente and post a “no ramen for YOU!!” comment.

 
 

not even–yeah, I noticed that too. On to McCain. And what Obama said about him.

Is it weird of me to be really happy that a mixed-race person finally has a chance of becoming President (you know, other than an Irish-Catholic who looked like everyone else in the line)? I just want to jump up and down and cheer! And that’s kind of rare for me.

Oh, for added humor Charles of LGF sort of live-blogged Obama’s Victory Speech (YAY!!!!!–for Obama, that is) in the comment version of snorts and grunts, which I promptly live-blogged at The Watch…HAHA. A more politically astute analysis of Obama’s speech really cannot be found than in the comments by Charles in the above link, I promise.

 
 

wow, Candy. Sorry to hear about the car and the day. Glad you’re ok but it still sucks.

 
not even an mba
 

Yeah, except Bob Dole’s problem was that Bob Dole was flat. Bob Dole delivered a speech like Bob Dole delivers pineapples, regularly in non-descript trucks. John McCain orates like a fifth grader in the school play. He seriously looks like he even he doesn’t believe the shit he’s saying.

 
 

Thanks gbear. I’m a little shook up but I’m going to crawl into bed and just forget about everything for a few hours. 🙂

 
 

#

g said,

June 4, 2008 at 0:46

Ahem. Begging your pardon. A gaffe is a mistake or a social mis-step.

When someone deliberately scripts an offensive joke, that is not a gaffe, it’s a deliberate insult.

Cheney was simply revealing the contempt in which he holds ordinary people, specifically those from West Virginia, and his joke was also intended as an insult to Obama.

This wasn’t a gaffe, it was a view inside his twisted soul.

I agree. I’m just saying, that’s what a gaffe is. (He spoke what he believed to be the truth, and it was socially inappropriate and personally damaging.)

It was just a little aside about the use of language. It irks me when reporters call regular dumbass mistakes “gaffes”.

 
Malfunctioning Larry Johnson Robot
 

I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon.I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon.I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon.I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon.I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon. I have the tape. It is devastating. How dare you ask me for the tape! You dummy, it’s coming soon.

 
Smiling Mortician
 

Memo to Lex: Do not link to LGF, at least not from here. It just leads to a screaming, bouncing, gaudy & idiotic animation that . . . wait. No worse than an actual link to LGF, I guess. Carry on.

 
 

Because I’m gracious, here’s one for Iris.

 
 

As with everywhere else it’s the people that make it an annoying place to live sometimes.

Getting back to this post, I enjoy West Virginia. But that’s when I’m in the mountains, with no one around.

I guess I’m just antisocial, or something.

 
 

Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mounting mama
Take me home, country roads.

 
Mo's Bike Shop
 

You can say those things when you’re not running for re-election.

Unfortunately, this is not an admission that he plans to leave on Jan. 20.

And since I actually come from BFE, I’ve got to chime in on you children of the Applebee harvest:

I grew up in a small town where you had to assume that at least a few of the kids on the short bus to Bangor were the result of the genetic boundaries of living on an island. Yeah, the parents had different names, but there were only about thirty family names on the island..

Inbreeding is a bad thing, that’s why we joke about it. But you achieve nothing by making other people the scapegoats of your anxieties. You may also reveal your misapprehension of the issues involved.

 
 

Country toads, stay off those country roads.

 
 

I like country roads myself.

 
 

I took a right at Albuquerque. You?

 
 

” No one’s died of redneck-ery, well except a handful of Darwin Award winners.”

I have to take issue with that notion. counter examples include the people who died in the Monongah Mine, the Hawks Nest Tunnel incident, the
Buffalo Creek Flood, the Mine Wars and more recently the Sago Mine. All were made possible by the notion that working class hillbillys (and Blacks and Italians in two of these cases) are somehow unimportant. I hate being all self righteous about this, and indeed I like me a good sheep-fucking joke as much as the next guy, but since we’re on the topic I thought I’d point it out.

 
humbert dinglepencker
 

Excuse me! Excuse me! I have two words…Don Surber.

 
 

So yeah, Ford said history was bunk; Edison said religion was bunk. And this trial is travesty of a mockery of a sham of a mockery of a travesty of two mockeries of a sham.

 
 

Thanks for the great post ;D

 
 

(comments are closed)