Because there haven’t been enough “This is central to my point” jokes around here lately

goldberginvisablesammich.jpg

Above: Did you ever hear of a ‘wish sandwich?’


Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! It’s like Christmas and my birthday and National Free Homosexual Abortions for Everyone Day all rolled into one for me!

Jonah Goldberg brings us some good news:

More Bookscan Chat

From a reader:

Subject: You beat the student but can you beat the masters?

Jonah, I sent your “gloat” over Yglesias’ low sale figures to a liberal friend in publishing and he conceded that you destroyed Matt’s numbers. However, he sent some figures suggesting that you don’t do quite as well against some true liberal heavyweights:

Chomsky, Hegemony or Survival – 176,000 (pb/hc) – Bookscan

Frank, What’s the Matter With Kansas? – 255,000 (pb/hc) – Bookscan

Rich, The Greatest Story Ever Sold – 113,000 (hc only) – Bookscan

Krugman, The Great Unraveling – 150,000 (pb/hc) – Bookscan

Phillips, American Theocracy – 147,000 (hc only) – Bookscan

Lakoff, Don’t Think of an Elephant – 255,000 (pb only) – Bookscan

Weiner, Legacy of Ashes – 101,000 (hc only) – Bookscan

Me: Not sure how to respond to this, as I am grateful for as well I’ve done even if I never sell another book. But a few points. First, my book is still selling, according to Bookscan about 1,200+ a week. The paperback (with new material!) won’t be released until 2009, so it’s entirely possible, though hardly guaranteed, that I will match or beat many of the combined sales numbers…

New material?!? The mind boggles. Anyone care to wager a guess as to what arcane secrets this new material will reveal? Personally, my money’s on a new chapter entitled, “Nepotism: How REAL men (NOT liberal fascists) Get Jobs at Formerly Respectable Conservative Publications.”

Gavin adds: My money’s on rebuttals, with that peculiar triumphal whining that Jonah emits when his arguments are demolished, thereby proving his point. An anticipated phrase: “Liberals only further demonstrated how much [the book] had gotten under their skin when they attacked its….”

Gavin hastens further to add: …Oh my gosh, no; that’s not what he’s up to at all. Joel, Blue Buddha, and Susan of Texas (in the comment section) totally pinned this one.

libfascfranklin.jpg

Because just as Franklin from Peanuts was named in sly reference to the most liberal and fascist of American presidents, the rapid rise of the demogogic Barack Obama campaign shows how ingrained and insidious is the liberal urge toward…

Well, I believe this is central to my point:

 

Comments: 107

 
 
 

My money is on a chapter entitled “Appeasement: How Obama’s Chamberlain-like foreign policy shows The Left is just like Hitler*”

*Note: I am not implying that The Left is exactly like Hitler, merely showing that they come from a similar intelektual background.

 
 

“I don’t really know too much about the new material that will be included in the paperback version, but I don’t think that’s the real issue. If any of you have studied my new material and can tell me what I should focus on, please e-mail me at paperbackwinger@aol.com.”

 
 

SPOILER ALERT!

I probably shouldn’t give this away but new edition will likely include the recent discovery by Pantload’s readers researchers that Mein Kampf was actually written by Karl Marx in 1879. The manuscript was then stolen by gay IslamoBohemian provocateurs, smuggled to Vienna and stashed in an attic where it languished for thirty years. Guess which disgruntled veteran of the Great War stumbled across it while looking for turpentine?

 
 

Liberal Blogs: Like the Hitler Youth but Even More Fascist

 
 

Appendix CC–How To Find An Audience For The Stupidest, Most Factually Devoid Argument In History.

Be your Momma’s Boy.

Write for the NRO.

Repeat.

 
 

Especially StrangelyNot or Whatever

 
 

Following His Grace: The November election will be the denouement of Goldberg’s narrative of liberal fascism’s rise to pervasiveness and permanence in the U.S. No matter what happens—whether the liberal fascist hard-liner (Clinton or Obama) or the liberal fascist lite (McCain) wins—true classical liberals will lose and the nation will suffer. Perpetual victimhood is Goldberg’s argumentative aim.

He should be able to write the coda the day after the election.

 
 

1, 200 a week. Wow, Jonah mommy is really laying out the money isn’t she?

But straight off the press is probably saving her a ton of money…

 
 

Can Pantsload write anything that isn’t both self-pitying and self-promoting? “It’s only my first book…Chomsky has the support of universities…the publisher didn’t print enough copies…I was No. 1!1!!1!!!” He really brings out the “pathology” in “pathetic.”

 
 

“How the Jon Stewart show is a death camp for rational argument”

 
 

Napoleon,

That picture was simply lovely. Haven’t seen anything that good since I stopped in a diner in the Midwest somewhere and they had portraits of various trucks belonging to their regulars… And yes, they called them portraits!

The best part was that the headlights and taillights really lit up!

Classy! And creepy! Just like that gun-totin’ jeebus…

 
 

I sure hope my rich friends can one day buy my book in bulk to drive up my sales. Oh wait, I don’t have rich friends. I must be a fascist.

 
 

The first book was too HRC-centric, since she was the clear and obvious Democratic nominee back when the book was scribbled out the first time.

He’ll have to go back and Obamaize some of the passages. For example, we’ll find that Obama is not really interested in strong diplomacy but rather a willful Nazi fascist sympathizer who will actually sell nukes to Iran to help pacify the Sadrites, and then launder the money over to terrorist guerrillas in South America so they can overthrow Hugo Chavez and replace his government with a military junta that, for all its flaws, is willing to bow to the new American Liberal Fascist government.

That chapter will not include a single word indicating any ironic self-awareness. Naturally.

 
 

You just don’t get it. Jonah insists that modern liberals are not as bad as the Nazis. It’s a nicer form of fascism. Modern liberals would never condone warrantless wiretapping, denial of habeas corpus, secret prisons, or torture. That’s the bad form of fascism. Wait a minute…

 
 

Wow, Jonah mommy is really laying out the money isn’t she?

They put the “nut” in “wingnut welfare”.

 
LA Confidential Pantload
 

The New Liberal Fascism: Now with Twice the Pantload!

 
 

Since the core of his argument seems to be “liberals want me to do good things, when I don’t want to, so they are fascists” there can be further chapters on:

Oppression of Fatherhood: “When I’m expected to change the baby’s diaper, it is a misuse of my Y chromosome, which was Intelligently Designed to favor wanking and letting Mommy get me jobs.”

Global Warming and the Castration of Conservatives: “The secret liberal fascist agenda is to make us all drive smaller cars so we don’t have a Manhood Compensation device anymore. What are we supposed to do then?”

The Fascism of High Expectations: “Liberals offered a choice of candidates, none of which were Old White Guys who did badly in school and life. This is goosestepping on my own hopes for a future in politics.”

 
 

Doodle Bean said,

May 18, 2008 at 16:39

Napoleon,

That picture was simply lovely. Haven’t seen anything that good since I stopped in a diner in the Midwest somewhere and they had portraits of various trucks belonging to their regulars… And yes, they called them portraits!

The best part was that the headlights and taillights really lit up!

Classy! And creepy! Just like that gun-totin’ jeebus…

When I lived in Dayton, OH, there was a mega flea market called “Trader’s World” halfway between Cincy and Dayton off I-75. It’s own by the megachurch next door, which a few years ago, boasted that they built the largest Jesus statue in North America*. At the flea market, various vendors have lightup waterfall pictures (like you see in Asian resturaunts) and fiber-optic statues galore. The best fiber optic statues are, of course, the angel and crucifix ones. There’s nothing like seeing “INRI” lit up with flashing multicolor lights, as if it were a neon sign on a diner saying “Eat at Joe’s”.

* North America, because the one in Brazil is larger.

 
 

Fuck yeah, the Chips!

 
 

That was in reference to picture caption, just to be clear.

 
 

largest Jesus statue in North America

Why is the cross only the size of his forearm?

 
 

Some quality whining further down in that paragraph about the paperback edition.

Authors like Chomsky and Krugman have/had huge institutional advantages given previous sales records a friendly mainstream media and enormous support in some cases from the Democratic Party (Lakoff, Krugman) and universities (Chomsky). Meanwhile, most of the mainstream outlets — NYT, The New Republic, The Economist, PBS etc — have either ignored the book entirely or played shabby shoot-the-messenger games trying to discredit me and the book rather than engage it honestly. Also, it’s been a miserable time for conservative books generally these last few years.

Battle on, Jonah!

 
 

pedestrian said,

May 18, 2008 at 18:04

Why is the cross only the size of his forearm?

Because it’s Mekka-Jesus, about to destroy Tokyo.

The best time to see that statue is in the winter, because it looks like he’s offering piles of snow as a sacrifice.

Yeah, Ohio is weird like that. The large cities (over 100k pop, such as Dayton, Toledo, Columbus, Cleveland, etc) have no problem with Muslims, Catholics, Buddhists, atheists, pagans, etc. wandering around, but once you leave those city limits, you’re in “you’re all going to Hell!” Fundyland.

 
 

There’s nothing like seeing “INRI” lit up with flashing multicolor lights, as if it were a neon sign on a diner saying “Eat at Joe’s”.

That’s nothin’ BB! Years ago, at the late lamented Jax Discount Store, they had brightly colored, blinking jeebus clocks!

I walked by on the way to work in the morning, saw them and thought, ‘Naw. That’s too tacky even for me! Besides, it’ll clash with my rockin’ Elvis clock…”

Sadly, by the time I changed my mind and went back at lunchtime, they were sold out. I never saw them again.

Damn!

 
 

Just to be clear, jeebus was blinking as the clock ticked. Classy! And creepy!

And I do love me some ‘Touchdown Jeebus’!

 
 

A friend of mine went to college there a few years ago, and reported it’s even weirder in person.

They don’t seem to have internalized that whole “meek” thing very well.

 
 

joel said,

May 18, 2008 at 16:56

The first book was too HRC-centric, since she was the clear and obvious Democratic nominee back when the book was scribbled out the first time.

He’ll have to go back and Obamaize some of the passages.

I bet that’s the reason for the update. When it went off to the printing press, Hillary was the “inevitable Dem candidate”, and no one thought Obama would even get this close to winning. What’s funny, is that around that time (late 2007), Giuliani was seen as the inevitable GOP candidate, and his campaign sank like a rock during the primaries because he couldn’t say anything besides “9/11”.

 
 

It’s own by the megachurch next door, which a few years ago, boasted that they built the largest Jesus statue in North America*.
Uh…no.

Not to mention that that Jesus is not only 6′ shorter than our 70-Foot Jesus, but is far too artistic. I much prefer the ill-proportion and milk-carton simplicity of our homegrown Lord & Savior. Plus, theirs is made out of wood and styrofoam…ours is concrete.

The ultimated bonus point…our Jesus was built by a Neo-Nazi, not some pansy megachurch.

 
 

NU CHAPTIR: “Barack Obama’s Racial Wrighto-Ayersian-Soetaran-Manchurian-Kenyo-Odingan-Bitter Fascism and How To Survive The Next Four Years In Your Mom’s Basement Especially With Frito-Lay Snacks”

 
 

1. Extensive corrections of facts.
2. Jonah’s Sekret Plan for Conservative Dominance, Starring Jonah Goldberg.
3. New chapter: How Barack Obama’s socialism will lead to unisex bathrooms and economic collapse, but with a happy face on it.

 
 

Oh, no, you know what comes next: the happy face has to be updated to clearly somehow reference Barack Obama. Discuss.

 
 

It’ll be a brown, not yellow, happy face?
Have an Afro?
Wear a Dashiki?

It certainly won’t be subtle.

 
 

The fact is that the Obama campaign is full of a bunch of juvenile whiners. Here is a reflection of how they act.

Bush: “Some seek to appease” (never mentioning Obama by name and not talking about him)

Obama culties: “WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH”

Huckabee: “That was Obama ducking from a gunman” (never mind that urban areas like Obama’s home town are filled with gun violence due to anti-gun laws)

Obama culties: “WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH”

E-mails: “Obama is a Muslim posing as a Christian” (never mind that it’s a reasonable suspicion, since Wright is a NOI Muslim, and Obama was raised a Muslim)

Obama culties: “WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH”

Real America is getting sick of the whining. Charles Johnson put it best.

I’m a little amazed that there are still Obama Democrats out there on all the talk shows today, whining and spinning and faux-seething about the President’s “appeasement” remarks in Israel. They want to look tough to the petulant Nutroots base, to the Kos Kids and the DUmmies and the Olberthings. They want to look different from John Kerry, who let himself be “swift-boated.”

They refuse to learn the lesson: “swift-boating” worked not because Kerry was a wimp about it (although he was), but because there was substance to a lot of their allegations. When you whine and complain about “unfair remarks,” but those remarks contain more than a grain of truth, it’s obvious to a lot of people—even to supporters. And whining doesn’t generally play well in the US.

The Obama camp is playing purely reactive politics, and in this case it’s over-reactive politics. I don’t think the American public is buying it, despite the deluge of desperately yapping Dems in the media.

The fact is that the President is right, and Obama knows that his policy of surrendering to terror is going to cost him the Presidency.

Obama might think that his time in Muslim schools and in Pakistan allows him to understand radical Islam, but he doesn’t know enough to oppose it’s terroristic aims.

 
 

Jeremiah Wright “was” a “former” member of the Nation of Islam, since he continues to praise Farrakhan and hasn’t been targeted for death for apotacsy (like Malcolm “X” was).. then that means that Wright is a member of the Nation of Islam, and Obama could be a member too.

 
 

I’m still sort of angry with Bush Jr. and all the Republicans for letting the September 11th, 2001 attacks happen in the first place. But they were just so sure that they didn’t have to have any meetings about terrorism that all the worried experts couldn’t get Bush Jr or Condi or Unka Dick or Mr. Eagles Soar tell them anything other than “no” or “you’ve covered your a**” or “no”.

 
 

The paperback (with new material!) won’t be released until 2009

Chyarite. If he’s adding new material we’ll see that bad boy shortly after McCane’s Vision of the Age of Aquarius comes true.

 
 

Mr. Eagles Soar was so concerned that he stopped flying on commercial airliners…he just wasn’t concerned enough to direct the FBI to concentrate attention on terrorists. Which is why there were a whole bunch of FBI in New Orleans on 9/11/01, staking out a whorehouse. Because as long as Mr. Eagles Soar was safe from terrorists, he could direct his deep concern to more important things, like sex for pay.

 
 

Well, let’s be honest, Ashcroft also had reason to be concerned about secularist fanatics who have always hated him.

 
 

Why, yes, I am an “Obama Cutie.”

But I also think I am attractive by virtue of my intelligence and compassion.

We liberals call this the “Trifecta” and it explains how we generally breed true.

 
 

Obama’s campaign didn’t get rolling until his campaign made the Obama Girl video.

That should tell you what you need to know about Obama’s feelings on women.

 
 

Anyways, Hillary has poisoned the water and millions of women will either not vote, or vote for McCain in order to get Hillary in 2012.

 
 

Well, let’s be honest, Ashcroft also had reason to be concerned about secularist fanatics who have always hated him.

Yes, because so many secularist fanatics have shot doctors outside of clinics and blown up nightclubs, and so many right-wing politicians have received anthrax mailings.

 
 

well, the number of abortion bombings is greatly exaggerated. And maybe security for right-wing politicians was so good that the anthrax mailings didn’t get so far up the ladder. Maybe the people they had working security were better than Daschle’s security.

 
 

that means that Wright is a member of the Nation of Islam, and Obama could be a member too.

You haven’t even scratched the surface. Oprah also used to be a member of Wright’s church and she hasn’t had a fatwah issued against her either, even though she left the church! George W. Bush appeared on Oprah when he was running for president in 2000 and openly hugged her on camera.

My question for you is this: If George W. Bush isn’t secretly a member of the Nation of Islam, WHY DIDN’T OPRAH KILL HIM???

 
 

Oprah left Trinity due to it’s radical teachings. Trinity is not technically NOI, but it’s a NOI front

 
 

The paperback will come with a secret decoder ring, accidentally left off the HB.

 
 

Maybe the gooper party won’t lose 7 Senate seats this fall.

Maybe they’ll lose 8.

What do you think, gary the ruppert?

 
 

Trinity is not technically NOI, but it’s a NOI front

It’s possible. I went to a mosque for years before finding out it was really just a front for the Jehovah’s Witnesses.

 
 

I heard Gary Ruppert had John McCain’s black baby.

 
 

well, the number of abortion bombings is greatly exaggerated

Ah, Gary, you take me back to the days of Operation Rescue’s notoriety:

Frome a speech by Rekha Basu at the Emma Golman Clinic:

And remember David Shedlock? He was the sanctimonious face of Iowa’s Operation Rescue,
a Bible-quoting Assemblies of God minister who blocked clinic entrances, accosted women in pharmacies, copied down their license plate numbers and sent letters to their houses chiding them for killing their babies. Not only did he end up impregnating another married anti-abortion activist while he was married to someone else, but he later went to jail for sexually abusing a couple of elderly residents of the nursing home where he worked.

But at least he was keeping Iowa safe from abortion.

Great peeps you Rethugs have on your side. Fine, upstanding folks. And not a hypocrite among ’em.

That is one thing I’ll say in absolute gratitude to Bill Clinton: He called out the federal marshalls on those terrorists. Even before Shedlock got busted for raping old people, he got busted for assaulting a federal marshall outside of Planned Parenthood in Des Moines, and did time.

But at least he wasn’t a liberal fascist.

 
 

Gary Ruppert:
Better material, please!!!!!

 
 

What the hell is a secular fanatic? Some who really, really doesn’t want to go to Church? Someone who doesn’t want the Pope telling Americans what to do? Someone who actually noticed that Bush steered a ton of money to black churches, making some much richer and more powerful, so they’d tell their congregations to vote for him? Someone who doesn’t like the Moonies bankrolling the Republican Party?

You’d better be for secularism or you will end up worshipping the Korean Father like your fellow repubs. Look it up. Senators, crowning ceremony, national humiliation.

If Islam ever takes over the US it’ll be because they paid Republicans to let them do it.

 
 

If Islam ever takes over the US it’ll be because they paid Republicans to let them do it.

Shrub didn’t sell his soul to rock and roll, you know.

 
 

Is there a way to figure out how many of the books Jonah “sold” were bought in bulk by conservative book clubs who then give them away or sell them at a steep discount?

And truly, anyone with any modicum of sense knows that the proper way to deal with the eeevil Iranians is to sell them weapons like Reagan did. That’ll show ’em who’s boss!

ence in the middle east.Or maybe, we can follow the Bush North Korea plan whereas we throw out the Clinton/Carter treaty that kept their plutonium locked up, freeing it up for nuclear weapons, only to, years later, go back and attempt to get a treaty that gets us half-way back to where we were before!

Republican foreign relations can be summed up as taking 15 steps back, then taking two forward and trumpeting the progress.

Here’s my chapter, “The negotiated peace between Egypt, Jordan, and Israel: How the liberal fascists lost their chance at winning a war.”

(Peace = no war, and no war = losing, ergo peace = losing, and endless war = winning.)

I am sure that the continued peace between Egypt, Jordan, and Israel will be central to his point that peace cannot be achieved through negotiation.

 
 

“Secular fanatic” is one of those Madlibs like “Liberal Fascism.”

Republicans used to use those cardboard code wheels. But since they discovered computers in, oh, 2007, they are able to come up with them more quickly.

They really should come up with one that encapsulates the whole “anti-abortion, pro death penalty” thing, which is presently so unwieldy under the term “pro-life.” I mean, it’s an oxymoron, isn’t it?

 
Your friendly neighborhood bookseller
 

Yes, we carry “Liberal Fascism.” It’s right over there, in Young Adult Fiction.

 
 

Did no one notice the eerie similarities in the hand gestures though!!!

http://media.radiosai.org/Journals/Vol_04/01APR06/images/Coverstory/sacred-heart-2-www.geocitie.jpg

Either that or I’m calling a ‘homopansy’ alert.

 
 

Don’t make fun of Jonah. He’s autistic.

Well, okay, he’s aspiring to autism.

 
 

I was thinking about Chamberlain’s folly. He was more afraid of the Commie Russians than the Nazi’s and allowed Hitler to extend his borders eastward, hoping to direct the Nazi war machine towards the commies and away from England and France. As horrible as this plan was, it actually makes a heck of a lot more sense than Bush’s plan to remove the quasi-secularist Iraq regime and hand Iraq over to a pro-Iranian regime in order to confront the Iranians(?! is that the plan?!). It also probably has more parallels with Reagan’s policies of arming the Taliban to confront the USSR in Afghanistan or Reagan’s policies of providing support to Iraq during the Iran-Iraq war in the sense that they both involve helping your eventual enemy gain more power.

 
 

[updated with a new pic, btw]

 
 

Looks more like Charlie Brown, Gavin. Especially with the red background.

I think you’ll need to go darker.

/cheney voice

 
 

A Hitler ‘stache, please?

 
 

Hilarious pic, Gavin. Someone totally has to produce a “Liberal Franklinism” T-shirt.

 
 

Oh, I found something else (see above). There’s definitely a long-simmering liberal plot, here, finding its final fatal flowering in Obamafascism.

 
 

Nope. Gary IS McCain’s illegitimate black baby. Just ask Karl.

 
 

Gavin, how did you get a video of Obama’s future Cabinet meetings?

 
 

Baby Jeebus in the News

My point keeps getting more and more central.

 
 

Dear Jonah,
Let me know when you’re done with the new material. I’ll make sure to leak it asap.

 
 

“Because it’s Mekka-Jesus, about to destroy Tokyo.”

Off topic, I guess, but in the old “Gatchaman” anime the heroes actually did fight (and blow up) a giant Mecha jesus in one episode. O.K. the giant evil Jesus was made of magma, but still. Later on in the series they fought Mecha Buddha to. He shot lasers from the chakra in his forehead. God I love that show.

 
 

I wish everyone didn’t hate me so.

Oh. Sorry about that, Tokyo…

 
 

Sorry. I just read this, spit half chewed scone on my computer, and HAD to share.

This is our esteemed SecState, on AF1 returning from the “Embarrass me W” mid east tour:

As for Arab criticism Bush leans too far in supporting Israel, Rice said, “The president isn’t pro this or pro that. The president is pro-democracy and pro-peace.”

Pro democracy and pro peace. What will he claim next? That he’s a former NFL star?

mikey

 
Trilateral Chairman
 

And truly, anyone with any modicum of sense knows that the proper way to deal with the eeevil Iranians is to sell them weapons like Reagan did. That’ll show ‘em who’s boss!

You know, the current shtick is that we’ve been in a state of undeclared war with Iran since 1979 or so. This leaves me with a hope–admittedly faint–that the Republicans will eventually be forced to throw Michael Ledeen, Oliver North, and John Poindexter under the bus. After all, they *did* provide aid and comfort to a hostile regime….

 
 

Jonah Goldberg is not a traitor. Gary Ruppert is also not a traitor. As far as I have been able to determine Goldberg’s and Ruppert’s problem is their use of the indefinite farticle. If you examine their texts carefully you note quickly that where one should apply the definite farticle they instead choose the indefinite farticle. Leads to all sorts of inversions, like you are what you write.

 
 

Doodle Bean wrote:
And I do love me some ‘Touchdown Jeebus’!

Correct usage of the indefinite farticle.

 
 

Ah, I’m ever the late one. I was thinking that ol’ JG needed an upgrade to his blog header, so I thought I’d make him one.

AKA, “fixed”.

 
 

As for Arab criticism Bush leans too far in supporting Israel, Rice said, “The president isn’t pro this or pro that. The president is pro-democracy and pro-peace.”

It is impossible for a BushCo lackey to open his or her mouth without committing grievous assault on logic.

The president isn’t pro anything, he’s pro something.

Wow.

It also reminds me of McCane statement that he wasn’t anti-anything.

 
 

MC McCane is objectively pro-neocon.

 
 

I expect Jonah’s next chapter will be something along the lines of

Liberal Treason: How the Media Destroyed the Bush Administration and Sabotaged the War in Iraq

 
 

I have never lied to you.
Well, that’s a lie.
But I swear, it’s the only one!

 
 

Liberal Treason: How the Media Destroyed the Bush Administration and Sabotaged the War in Iraq

Sounds way too reasonable. I’m betting on something more akin to…

“The Hippies are going to grind up millions of fetuses from forced abortions and use them to fertilize switchgrass for their anti oil campaign against America.”

I could be wrong, and he’s likely to have room for both. It’s not like he has an editor, or anything.

 
 

WordPress killed my father.

 
 

“The paperback with new material…” hmm. I suppose Pantyload will prove that any African American who voted for Obama is fascist. When it is pointed out that the Revs Jackson and Sharpton weren’t made President, he’ll say that proves his point, whatever it is!

Maybe the book will come with cupons for 1/2 off the 2nd dinner at Chilis’ or a free Grande Latte, no scratch that, a free uh– what DO conservatives drink to forget?

 
 

Maybe the book will come with cupons for 1/2 off the 2nd dinner at Chilis’ or a free Grande Latte, no scratch that, a free uh– what DO conservatives drink to forget?

</I

It should have Taco Bell coupons.

 
 

If Jillian is still reading, this 2006 speech, “The Founding Fathers and the Economic Order” by Forrest McDonald, (a highly respected and very conservative historian known as widely acknowledged as quite an expert on the period) might be of interest with respect to your teaching about the depression…

Granted, he’s a conservative, but he’s not pc. Forgive the dig at “effeminancy” (consider the period) and that he appears to be glad Hamilton got his way. Perhaps we all are. That doesn’t mean Hamilton’s views were part of the vision shared by of most or all of the founders. Quite the contrary.

An excerpt:

As to whether the Framers intended to create a capitalistic order, the weightier evidence balances to the contrary. Let us start by considering what they understood by property rights. The appropriate source is Sir William Blackstone’s 4 volume Commentaries on the Laws of England, a work that James Madison said was “in every man’s hand.” On the second page of the second volume, subtitled “Of the rights of things,” Blackstone defines property as “That sole and despotic dominion which one man claims and exercises over the external things of the world, in total exclusion of the right of any other individual in the universe.” Splendid statement, but Sir William devotes the remaining 518 pages of the volume to qualifying and specifying exceptions to his definition.

Every state had adopted English prohibitions of “offenses against public trade,” which banned usury, regulated the price of bread, and forbade such practices as “forestalling” (buying or contracting commodities on their way to market), “engrossing” (buying large quantities of commodities with intent to sell them in other markets), and “regrating” (buying and reselling products in the same market). Americans, like Englishmen, also recognized that their right to acquire and hold private property was subject to rights residing in the public. As an aggregate of individuals, the public retained rights to grazing, wood gathering, hunting, passage, and water use on privately owned lands. In its corporate or governmental capacity, the public reserved the right to restrict the use of private property and even take it from the owners in certain conditions.

These legal barriers were reinforced by ideological considerations. Granted, Americans were, by and large, a practical and not an ideological people, but they had embraced a pair of ideas that took deep roots. First was republicanism. When Americans proclaimed their commitment to republicanism as part of the reaction against George III in 1776, most did so willy-nilly without knowing what it entailed. The body of literature on the subject was large and readily found, however, and soon public figures were versed on the subject. The actuating principle of a republic was public virtue, virtue meaning manly devotion of one’s self to the wellbeing of the public. The opposite of virtue was vice, meaning effeminacy, or a love of luxury.

The very idea of economic growth that inheres in a market economy was incompatible with this primary principle of republicanism. Plato, believing that relative equality of property is essential to a republic, proposed to limit inheritances and recommended that no republic be established on the sea or on a navigable river, for that “would expose it to the dangers of commerce” and the inequalities that resulted from trade. Lycurgus, “in the most perfect model of government that was ever framed,” ancient Sparta, had forbidden trade altogether. And Montesquieu, whom American devoutly admired, declared that if people were allowed “to dispose of property [as they] pleased,” a republic would be “utterly undone.” As disparate a pair of Americans as John Adams and Benjamin Franklin agreed. Adams denounced credit as responsible for “most of the Luxury & Folly which has yet infected our People,” and declared that anyone who could devise a way to abolish credit forever “would deserve a Statue to his Memory.” Franklin characterized commerce as “generally cheating” and wrote bitterly of its corrupting and debilitating effects.

The second ideological barrier arose from the agrarian tradition and the accompanying mystique of the land. You have heard Jefferson’s quotation – isnt it on the Jefferson Monument in Washington? – “those who labor in the earth are the chosen people of God if ever He had a chosen people.” That attitude was widely shared in l8th century America, and so was Jefferson’s comment that “the mobs of great cities add just so much to the support of pure government as sores do to the strength of the human body.” These prejudices found expression in assorted ways, including the ubiquitous landed property qualifications for voting and office holding, which insured that agricultural interests would dominate government at the expense of commercial, manufacturing, and financial interests….

http://oll.libertyfund.org/index.php?Itemid=267&id=177&option=com_content&task=view

 
 

Of course, he won’t finish the new material until about 2013, so whatevs.

 
 

Did you think Kathleen Parker was bad?

Freddy “my friends call me Neo-Fred” Hiatt sez have some Toe-Suck Guru:

ifthethunderdontgetya wrote:
Dick Morris scribbled:
But I don’t do political science; I do politics, and I’m convinced that McCain can still win — if he’s willing to follow the road map below.
—————————————–
You’re going to reveal your toe-sucking secrets, Dick?

What a surefire vote-getter! I hope McSame listens to your advice.
~
5/18/2008 6:20:31 PM

!

 
 

The fact is, one of my conservative credentials is screwing my sister. It works out well for me, and it differentiates me from you liberals.

 
 

It really writes itself.

Black liberation theology = Aryan supremacy
Obama stadium rallies = Nuremberg rallies
Will.I.Am = Leni Riefenstahl.

Of course, American liberal fascism is very different than German Nazi fascism – indeed that is central to his putz. For example, Claus von Stauffenberg tried to spare the German army from total defeat by assasinating Hitler with a suitcase bomb, whereas an American officer trying to spare his country the humiliation of withrawal from Iraq would probably use a gun. Bombs have become too Muslim.

 
 

Fozzetti said,

May 18, 2008 at 23:53

Maybe the book will come with cupons for 1/2 off the 2nd dinner at Chilis’ or a free Grande Latte, no scratch that, a free uh– what DO conservatives drink to forget?

…or perhaps a coupon for 1/2 off on a TGI Friday’s Bisexual Three Way Romp appetizer.

 
 

With a purposeful grimace and a terrible sound
He pulls the spitting high tension wires down
Helpless people on a subway train
Scream bug-eyed as he looks in on them
He picks up a bus and he throws it back down
As he wades through the buildings toward the center of town

Oh no, they say hes got to go
Great Mecha Jesus!
Oh no, there goes Tokyo
Great Mecha Jesus!

History shows again and again
How nature points up the folly of men
Mech Jesus!

 
 

Meanwhile, most of the mainstream outlets — NYT, The New Republic, The Economist, PBS etc — have either ignored the book entirely or played shabby shoot-the-messenger games trying to discredit me and the book rather than engage it honestly.

Talk about an ungrateful bastard. Sam Tanenhaus at the NYT did his usual thing of getting a softball review for a wingnut book (as opposed to the hatchet jobs he commissions for liberal books) and just because the review wasn’t kissing his fat behind, he gets a strop on.

DP is a made man in the wingnut family, larded with money for fucktardery. Of course, the wingnut welfare roll might get a bit pinched next year, just in time for the paperback.

 
 

Here’s a chapter for Jonah’s book:
Republican senator wants lowest income renters to pay for mortgage bailout
http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/2008/05/republican-sena.html

 
 

And whenever someone does engage his book honestly he replies “Yawn” Perhaps the PB will come free with a XXXLG bag of Cheetos. The kind you get at Walmart.

 
 

Why is the cross only the size of his forearm?
“It’s twue, it’s twue!”
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, miss, but you’re sucking on my cross.”

 
 

DP is a made man in the wingnut family, larded with money for fucktardery. Of course, the wingnut welfare roll might get a bit pinched next year, just in time for the paperback.

I believe this would be the ultimate illustrative example of that colorful phrase, “pinching a loaf”. Or perhaps in this case, a bunch of them.

 
 

…larded with money for fucktardery.

a pull quote for the paperback edition….

 
 

I don’t see the problem.

There are still Millions of Howler Monkeys.

Rock on, dood…

mikey

 
 

larded with fucktardery for money.

may be more appropriate…

 
Teh Howler Monkeys
 

Inspired by the heroic example of our brother & sister workers in the S,N! hamster wheels, we have initiated a program of industrial militancy. We will bang out no more screeds of gaseous persiflage until our entirely reasonable demands are met. More edible foliage and a better retirement package for the Howler Monkeys!

larded with money for fucktardery.
Also, we would like to see this in one of RB’s recipes.

 
 

Alright, I wanna know right NOW!

Are Teh Howler Monkeys Herr Clyde or our favorite Mortician?

mikey

 
 

[whistles nonchalantly. Goes back to work.]

 
 

Anyway for a smart and dexterous guy to get in on this wildlife welfare?? I’m willing to work nights…

(Mmmm. Green Pellets. Delivered)

 
 

My 5-year-old really hates Sesame Street….should I be getting suspicious? I mean, she’s just never, ever liked it.

 
 

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