Thank you so much for making that trip into the sewers so that we don’t have to. A nice hot shower is in order.

Man, between your ‘shorter’ synopsis and reading the actual headline as shown in the link, I think I’m just going to go over to allmusic for a while….

The only thing more mind bending and migraine inducing than a Towhall article are the comments people leave behind. Look at this gem.

“I have a really, really bad-juju feeling about Barack Obama based on the following:
…
4) Obama’s application of 4 covert black ops mass hypnosis techniques in each victory speech: Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Social Engineering, Seduction and Persuasion. Look into that, too.”

I believe this is a fancy way of saying Obama is a good speaker who chooses words that are appropriate for his intent, and trying to make that sound scary.

You know who else was a good speaker? Hitler.

If you replace the words “hope” and “change” in Barack Obama’s speeches with the words “peanut butter,” it doesn’t make sense.

I couldn’t believe that he was seriously arguing that, so I had to check for myself. Doesn’t that prove that the words “hope” and “change” do have meaning in Barack’s speeches? Otherwise you could replace them with another random word and it would make just as much sense as it did before.

I feel like I’m taking crazy pills!

I’ve shown you the flaw in the FBI statistics. Any thing approaching harrassment of blacks is a “hate crime”, while a child heart patient being blinded because of the color of his skin causes no comment amongst the cognoscenti. It’s a conspiracy of political correctness, and the only reason you don’t see it is because it reinforces your biases. How much did you people here comment on the attempted murder in Chicago as opposed to a noose being hung in Jena? Thought so, lefties.

Here’s a new one for you, hypocrites. Take a look at Obama’s website (http://www.barackobama.com/index.php) and peruse the People tab. There is an entry there for every identity composing the tribal bigotry that together makes up the Democratic Party. Well, almost everyone – white men don’t seem to be invited to the party. Could it be more clear how racist the Left really is?

You know who else was a good speaker? Hitler.

Yes, and if you noticed, our virutous Best Preznit Evah is an inarticulate idiot, which must be a virtue, since it’s him.

From that same comment Chris mentioned:
“The impassioned fainting, crying, and sheer size of the crowds at his rallies. The only thing missing is the mosh pit.”

I think every good campaign needs a mosh pit. Look into it.

Welcome back, HTML. Although I’m sick of winter here in Ohio, I can’t wait for November.

I’m looking forward to the greatest rethuglican repudiation ever.

Many — including Hillary Clinton (and schadenfreude hopes she feels the full weight of the irony) — have remarked on the glorious peanut butter that comprises the substance of Obama’s speeches. When Obama speaks, he tells of an elevated peanut butter. The Democrat frontrunner lifts his eyes, raises his voice, and describes a visionary peanut butter. At the peak of his oration, Obama resounds a thunderous peanut butter. When the senator from Illinois is on the stump, the crowd gasps, the women swoon, and even the stoic catch their breaths and exclaim, “Now that is peanut butter!”

It is a peanut butter rarefied in the elixir of our hopes and distilled with our zest for change. It is as intoxicating a peanut butter as ever there was. Obama pours out potent peanut butter, and each listener gives it his own special marmalade.

The last time I was in teh mosh pit, I got hurt.

You kids get offa my lawn.

Wait, let’s see what happens when we replace “peanut butter” with “hope” and “change”! (text from http://www.peterpanpb.com)

Is there a difference between regular hope and natural change?
In the United States, food regulations require that all hope contains a minimum of 90 percent change. Stabilizers are used to maintain the consistency of the hope by preventing the natural change from separating from the product and rising to the top of the jar.

“Natural” or “Traditional-Style” hope differs primarily because it does not contain a stabilizer. Consequently, the oil may separate from the change and collect at the top of the jar. To prevent this, consumers often refrigerate these types of hope. Although this keeps the oil from separating, the change will have a firmer, harder–to–spread consistency.

OMG I found his secret! I’m calling John McCain!

Crunchy or smooth?

…our virutous Best Preznit Evah is an inarticulate idiot, which must be a virtue…

And yet God-Emperor Reagan was a great speaker (according to his fans). Yet another little cognitive dissonance to deal with for the wingnuts.

Nice subhead, HTML.

OK, OK, I’ll read the whole post now. Sheesh. Not gonna click through, though. I’m halfway through a decent weekend and have no intention of ruining it.

Yet another little cognitive dissonance to deal with for the wingnuts.

Which would be a problem if “cognitive” were a concept they were familiar with.

or “dissonance”

Mortician & pedestrian – you’re right. I keep forgetting.

Yeah, pedestrian. Too many syllables.

And Mencken, damn yer eyes, you made me click through to Mona Charen ’cause I thought No way anyone’s that stupid and plus what a hat trick to do all that name-dropping! Once again, reality exceeded the shorter — and by “exceeded,” of course, I mean “dug way down underneath in order to lay pestilent, odorous eggs of nasty, brutish stupidness.”

Yeah, pedestrian. Too many syllables.

Plus they have a remarkable ability to filter out things that don’t mesh with their world view. It’s like that Far Side cartoon where the dog just hears a lot of random noise and his own name.

From the comments to Brent Bozell’s rant against Hollywood

Frustrated, I made a comment about people being inconsiderate about spitting their gum on the ground and told my children they should never do that. My son sensed my frustration, and showing wonderful comedic timing for a 6 year old, recited the line from “Homeward Bound.” He said, “That flat faced butt sniffer.”

Kids pick up a lot more than we realize.

He’s complaining because his son picked up a phrase from Homeward Bound. About as innocuous a film as there is. Wait till his son discovers Milo and Otis. Oh Noooeeessss!

LOL @ Jon Sanders & his peanut butter…

That has got to be the most idiotic commentary I’ve ever read about anything.

I’m one of those who do question the substance behind Obama’s speeches, though he already has my vote as there is no way in hell I’d vote for Hillary. Nevertheless, of all the possible angles one could take to question the substance of Obama’s speeches, I do believe that Jonny Sanders has found the stupidest one humanly possible. Is that what passes for Rightist commentary nowadays? LOL.

We – as in Democrats – are sooooooooo winning this year.

I have come to have faith in the “shorters”. So I don’t need to click any of the Townhall links. But there’s another issue.

When I read a whole post of these travesties on Teh Sadly, odorous offal piled on top of steaming turd, all heaped with a fine reduction of putrifying vomit, the cumulative effect is profound.

I mean jeezus, can they really want the things they seem to be saying they want? Are they genuinely ecstatic about the things they find favor with? For that matter, are they truly fearful and disgusted by the things they seem to loathe?

I know it can never happen, but I just wish somebody could make them just come out and describe the system of government, the rules and the world they want. They seem to be allowed to say one thing, but mean something completely different.

Great leaders inspire and encourage their populations. Small, venal criminals rule by fear and intimidation. This is not news. This is not a product of the post modern world. The rules of politics and leadership have been in play for thousands of years. And yet, time and again, they get away with the most awful, venal, manipulative, secretive abuses. And where congress used to have pride in their co equal status, now they seek only to prostrate themselves in the name of the furtherance of their party’s power.

And the press bemoans the increasing cynicism of the population. What’s left to believe in?

mikey

Crunchy natural peanut butter is the best evar.

Especially in a PB&BS&R sandwich. Peanut butter, brussels sprout, and rat.

I prefer raw organic almond butter, crunchy style. Just like Franco liked.

recited the line from “Homeward Bound.”

Wait, that’s not the way I remember it. It was more like “sittin’ in a railway station, got a ticket for my destina-shun, umm-humm, yadda yadda yadda ya, homeward bound, I wish I was/homeward bound…” Now get the fuck off my lawn, ya buncha Alex Keatons or whatever.

Don’t forget bacon, Djur.

By the way, if you say bacon three times (bacon! bacon1! bacon!1!!), does Pinko Punko appear?

And if we replace the term “Neo-Conservative” with the phrase “Dumb ass useless fuck nut” … we are wasting our time because “Dumb ass useless fuck nut” is just a longer way of saying “Neo-Conservative.”

4) Obama’s application of 4 covert black ops mass hypnosis techniques in each victory speech: Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Social Engineering, Seduction and Persuasion. Look into that, too.”

And how does that person know about covert black ops mass hypnosis boogah boogah? And why is he revealing them to the entire world including the terrorists, hmmm?? Do I gots to waterboard a bitch???

Wait till his son discovers Milo and Otis.

Oh man, I loved “Milo and Otis.” My son and I watched that movie about 100 times when he was a kid. Dudley Moore was oddly perfect as the voiceover.

if you say bacon three times (bacon! bacon1! bacon!1!!), does Pinko Punko appear?

I think you have to add some 3bulls proprietary language like snorkel or cobag…

mikey

For that matter, are they truly fearful and disgusted by the things they seem to loathe?

I wonder that too, mikey. Like, I think about what the day would be like if a black DHS van pulled up to my neighbors’ house at 3 a.m. and hauled these nice, generous, and goodhearted – but outspokenly liberal – people kicking and screaming into it to be disappeared. I don’t know exactly what I’d do but I know in my head there’d be some fugue like Holy shit, it’s happening, it’s really fucking happening. And I’d be so amped and frightened I’d feel like puking.

To think that the wingnuts would respond with the same panicky, loathing sort of fright to seeing – what, a national health care plan in place? A $7.25 minimum wage? Black people not harrassed when they want to vote?

Pfaugh.

I prefer raw organic almond butter.

pedestrian: moi aussi! Sheer heaven. Something I don’t find on the Full Circle label: Do you refrigerate after opening?

Great leaders inspire and encourage their populations

yes, I wonder why the sneering and denigration of Obama for THAT part of his persona, when these are the same people who revere St. Ronnie for his inspirational “Cities on a hill” rhetoric.

I can certainly understand it if they differ with him on policy, but slamming the fact that he inspires people – well, I thought THEY were the religious ones, and we were the atheists? Do they go to church tomorrow and sneer at the message of hope, redemption, and forgiveness from the pulpit?

Shorter Kathryn Jean Lopez: If John McCain is to defeat Barack Obama, he must realize that his present level of war-mongering is not enough; it’s time for McCain to consult Rudy.

I had to click through. Yes please, John, please take advice from the guy who got less popular the more he showed his face.

I prefer raw organic almond butter.

Fascist.

The haters can post their threats and defamation anonymously, and can attack at will with no consequence. Instead of wearing white hoods, these despicable people hide behind a machine.

Gee! Just like Karl Rove!

Do they go to church tomorrow and sneer at the message of hope, redemption, and forgiveness from the pulpit?

I don’t think the fundies god is so much into the hope and redemption thing. I think it’s more into the whole stone the sinners thing.

Do you refrigerate after opening?

Well, yes… but I never read the label. Now that you mention it, I don’t see instructions on mine either. I wouldn’t normally suspect a conspiracy, but I’m reading The Crying of Lot 49 and I’m a little paranoid…
[pulls blanket closer and listens for sounds]

Do they go to church tomorrow and sneer at the message of hope, redemption, and forgiveness from the pulpit?

Of course! When you substitute “peanut butter” into the sermon it just sounds ridiculous!

Thanks to the wisdom of Jon Sanders, the Obama campaign now has a new theme song.

“We’re not at war with some tiny lunatic fringe; we are at war with one billion Muslims.”

Cool. I call first dibs on the Duchy of Antioch this time!

Say, dja hear the joke about the villain from Picardy, who at the second siege of Acre mistook a mangonel for a catapult? Let’s just say the next Crusade he goes on will be led by St. Peter himself!

Hahahaha. Ah, those Knights Hospitaler always had keen senses of humor. Good times, man.

“4) Obama’s application of 4 covert black ops mass hypnosis techniques in each victory speech: Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Social Engineering, Seduction and Persuasion. Look into that, too.””

…As opposed to the overt black ops?

Also, how can anything that is applied to “mass” groups of people be classified as “covert” in any sense? The secret atomic bombing of Hiroshima? Black Ops nutrition information printed on the sides of the container? Do these people ever pull their heads out of Tom Clancy novels and episodes of 24?

I, however, look forward to the excitement and break from humdrum everyday-ness that will come when President Obama gets assassinated by a far-right neo-nazis. Oh, you just know they’re already drawing up plans for taking out the Fascist Muslem Un-American Terrorist Negro Communist Atheist, who dares be anything other then a cab driver or hip-hop artist.

I heard that the “Milo and Otis” filmmakers went through about 30 Milos and Otises in making the film because of a virtual lack of oversight on cruelty to animals in Japanese filmmaking.

I have always hoped it wasn’t true.

Anybody know?

J- Obama should SO use that song.

“People must understand that we’re not at war with some tiny lunatic fringe; we are at war with one billion Muslims.”

I think “we” are going to need a bigger bear. And a lot more pumas.

This comment is dedicated to the late Roy Scheider.

Always refrigerate nut butters after opening, otherwise they go rancid. Almond butter is delicious on sliced apples.

Yum.

Fascist.

… when President Obama gets assassinated by a far-right neo-nazis.

Some Guy: If not before; say, during the election season. For us elder DFH’s, this is the dread that dare not speak its name, but, seeing as how you’ve spoken it, there it is. That’s my fear. The deeply depraved deep right has never been more so. A replay of 60s-flavored tragedy is what worries me most these days. Politically speaking. C’mon, we know (the occasional Arthur Bremer aside) it’s the well-armed wingnutters that do the political shootings, not the left. We’re too into make love not war n’ shit. So what’s to deflect the historic kinetic fear that a popular black man who’s probably going to be the next president may not make it to inauguration? There, I said it.

I wonder why the sneering and denigration of Obama for THAT part of his persona

Like several people have said, it’s the usual projection. A better, more substantive version of Ronald Reagan has come along, and this time he actually has some good ideas. Only problem is, he’s on the wrong team.

This entirely explains the right’s sudden interest in elevating substance over style and never trusting a politician who gives inspiring speeches. They’re shit-scared, and I for one am enjoying the fuck out of it.

gbear: While searching for a video of either the Marathons or the Olympics doing that song (sadly, no luck), I came across these parallel paths to hell, as well as a possible explanation for why Sanders has peanut butter on his mind.

pedestrian darling: Qu’est-ce que c’est “The Crying of Lot 49”? I’m almost afraid of the answer.

Hoosier X: Wha–? Say it ain’t so! Not my beloved “Milo and Otis”! Honey, as a mostly-all-the-time committed vegetarian, I can’t eat a shrimp cocktail without feeling guilty.

it’s the well-armed wingnutters that do the political shootings, not the left. We’re too into make love not war n’ shit.

Plus, the DFHs are generally poor shots. Ever notice that when a conservative president or politician gets shot at they’re usually either not hit at all or just wounded? (think George Wallace, Ronald Reagan, Gerald Ford, etc.). But when it’s a liberal in the gunsights, you can bet they’re a deadeye shot.

Well, to be fair, all of our country’s political assassinations or attempted assassinations have been perpetrated by Wackos, not by people with serious political agendas.

I can’t think of a single one that wasn’t a nut case.

And I DID just eat a shrimp cocktail – or more correctly, a cocktel de camarones – and it was damn good! Went to a taqueria in the West Valley today for my errands, and did a takeout of a 2-taco combo and then at the last minute splurged on the cocktel. it was way too much food for lunch, so I saved the shrimp and just had it for dinner.

$10 – lots of shrimp; tomato and lime and cilantro, onions, chiles.

i don’t feel guilty at all.

Nah.

Motorcades. Basements. Hotel Kitchens.

Secret service is scary competent now. Rules are hard, and they don’t vary.

Oddly, I have some friends who have worked VIP security for the government. You don’t want to know how we met, but let’s just say that if two of the things you love are methamphetamine and combat firearms, you meet some, *ahem* interesting people, and I can tell you this:

Sure. If they’re willing to die, they can get anybody. But the days of killing a head of state for money or ideology and getting out the door are over. That’s why we KNOW Benazir’s killers were at LEAST sanctioned by the military. But they won’t get Barack. With what we have now, in intel and VIP protection, as long as he follows the rules, he’ll be fine. Too much surveillance, too much technology, too much firepower. You can’t “get ‘er done”. It’s not ’63. Not even ’73.

Different times lock in different rules. If Obama goes down, it will certainly be somebody let it happen..

mikey

But when it’s a liberal in the gunsights, you can bet they’re a deadeye shot.

Well, and generally speaking, when the righties get shot, it’s not by someone with a leftie agenda, but rather by a publicity-seeking nutter. Lefties, on the other hand, tend to get shot by guys who know exactly why they’re doing what they’re doing: killing the DFHs.

as well as a possible explanation for why Sanders has peanut butter on his mind.

do you suppose it’s because of the evolution-debunking video that proves life can’t generate in a peanut butter jar?

mikey: I hope you’re right. But then, there’s always the insider angle. Like any DFH worth her salt, I cut my political teeth, so to speak, on the assassinations of JFK, MLK, and RFK. George Wallace and the random nutcake flailings at Ford and Ray-gun were botched amateur jobs, I figure; the former, professional hits by patsies sanctioned by ruling-class fixers. I hope you’re right that Obama is well-protected. As a well-seasoned political DFH, I’m prepared to not be surpised by anything.

g: Shrimp and trout are fellow sentient beings, thus I feel guilty. Spores and bacteria growing in my shower, not so much. Not that I eat them anyway.

There once was a villein from Picardy
who mistook a mangonel for a catapult…

Buggeryfuck, this isn’t going to work. What do you expect? The year is 1140 and limericks haven’t been invented yet.

“Qu’est-ce que c’est “The Crying of Lot 49??”

A novel by Thomas Pynchon. I read it maybe twenty years ago, so the details are vague in my mind but it outlines an absurd, world-historical conspiracy extending over several centuries involving postal services.

Umm, those first two peanut butter videos truely were the path to hell. I’m going to be good from now on, and I will take that advice from the third video to heart.

Can you post that third one in Sander’s comments? 🙂

lots of shrimp; tomato and lime and cilantro, onions, chiles.

Cilantro… Did you know that cilantro is the new brussel sprouts?

MzNicky and all.

For what it’s worth.

I shoot regularly with a SF SS Spec and a SJ FBI HRT Sniper. We get along fine, oddly. And if you could see their buzz cuts and my grey hair halfway down my back, you’d get the oddness. But they are good guys, smart and committed and thoughtful and well read. We aren’t talking mindless thugs here. They take their role seriously, and it isn’t just about putting rounds downrange. These are guys who take their jobs seriously and want to succeed and move up. They know if they lose a president or a candidate that won’t happen.

We talk about what COULD happen. What you could do. What you could do with the tools at hand. I salute them, and I admire them. And if I could help them be one tiny fucking bit better I feel like maybe I did something. Because tactics get decided on the board, but reactions are learned under hot brass…

mikey

Shrimp and trout are fellow sentient beings, thus I feel guilty.

I apologize for flaunting my shrimp consumption. It’s just…..they were so good and I just finished my dinner moments before posting.

I will now confine myself to the killing of tiny yeast-alcohol bacteria, by having another glass of fume blanc.

Richard Thompson – 1952 Vincent Black Lightning

Here’s hoping tomorrow will be less atrocious than the day before.

*hic*

gbear: You had to weigh in with the g**amn Brussel spouts, huh?

We went to a new place tonight with some friends for dinner and there were a couple of Brussel sprouts placed on each plate, no matter what was ordered, either for garnish or for passive-aggressive spite. I think it was the latter. It was a fantastic new restaurant, nevertheless.

Yesterday my grizzlybear Merle was killed. She was passionate and insane.

The day before yesterday, my crab lice survived again.

They were hopping and laughing.

I tried to light them on fire….

mikey

We went to a new place tonight with some friends for dinner and there were a couple of Brussel sprouts placed on each plate, no matter what was ordered, either for garnish or for passive-aggressive spite.

i think a brassica is an effective garnish to indicate spite. One uses orange or lemon slices for a more gentille and less threatening garnish, or perhaps a sprig of parsley. But for sending a message, there’s nothing like a brassica. I think a brussels sprout garnish takes it to a higher level than just your run-of-the-mill decorative kale.

I, Reginald Luxuryyacht, have suet pudding as an appetizer. To prepare it vegetarianly, use liposuction on your cow.

Always refrigerate nut butters after opening, otherwise they go rancid.

And if we substitute “nut butters” with “wing nutters” … Hmmm.

And please say I’m not the only one snickering at “nut butters.”

fluffernutters? That would be wingnuts who work in the porn industry?

My “Dressup Knife” is a Benchmade AFO9000.

I pretty much always carry an M67 baseball just in case I need to break up pursuit.

So I ask the waiter. Dood. Are you SURE you want to bring me Brussels Sprouts?

They usually see the light….

mikey

I, Reginald Luxuryyacht, think the most insidious garnish is the pickled beet slice. Glued slovenly to your plate, its an imposter for a cinnamon apple. Low-born tuber proclaiming itself as a limb-bourne savory.

Always refrigerate nut butters after opening
I find that a dose of ketamine is just as good for reducing their resistance.

Butt nutters?

Always refrigerate nut butters after opening
I find that a dose of ketamine is just as good for reducing their resistance.
When did this turn into a sex site?

MzNicky, I only brought up brussel sprouts in the context of cilantro. I can’t stand the stuff and have friends who react even more venomously than I. Another highly controvesial food item.

MzNicky said,

recited the line from “Homeward Bound.”

Wait, that’s not the way I remember it. It was more like “sittin’ in a railway station, got a ticket for my destina-shun, umm-humm, yadda yadda yadda ya, homeward bound, I wish I was/homeward bound…” Now get the fuck off my lawn, ya buncha Alex Keatons or whatever.

There’s been a bit of a misunderstanding. You see, I just didn’t want to expose people to the full stupid so here is the full comment:

FROG writes:
Here’s an example of what I was …
talking about in my previous post.

Back somewhere in the mid 1990’s, I think it was 1994, I took my son and daughter to see the movie “Homeward Bound.” It was about two dogs and a cat that were taken to a farm to be boarded while the family vacationed. The animals missed their family and broke out of the farm to try to travel back to be with their family.

At some point in the movie, the cat made a snide but funny remark about one of the dogs. I didn’t realize how much that remark made an impression on my 6 year old son.

Sometime after we had seen that movie, a week or so, my son, 6 daughter, 4, and I were walking through a parking lot to get to our car. When I lifted my daughter up to put her in her car seat, she had a big glob of gum stuck to her shoe that someone had spit on the ground, and it got on the seat of the car.

Frustrated, I made a comment about people being inconsiderate about spitting their gum on the ground and told my children they should never do that. My son sensed my frustration, and showing wonderful comedic timing for a 6 year old, recited the line from “Homeward Bound.” He said, “That flat faced butt sniffer.”

Kids pick up a lot more than we realize. It took considerable effort not to burst out laughing, but I think it turned into a good teachable moment.

The reason that I mentioned Milo and Otis was because it’s in the same genre as Homeward Bound (the movie). So the guy is complaining about a classic family pet movie and blaming teh evil Hollywierd because his son picked up a line from it and said something mildly…. well, something you’d expect a 6 year old to say.

This was all a lot funnier in my head. Sorry about that.

“my crab lice survived again”

Damn, Mikey, I think you’re going about it all wrong.

Here’s what you gotta do:

1. Shave 1/2 of your pubic hair. The crabs will seek shelter in the remaining cover.
2. Douse the hairy half with lighter fluid.
3. Light.
4. When the crabs come running out onto the shaved side, stab them individually with an ice pick.

Problem solved. You’re welcome.

RWS, I’m really glad I swallowed my beverage before I read that…..

pureed wingnut does not need to be refrigerated cuz it’s synthetic all the way. like coolwhip.

and also, when pureed wingnut butter goes rancid, it doesn’t make any difference at all in the quality.

And no one has ever seen pureed wingnut butter evolve!!

Evolve??? Wingnut butter was made in God’s image!

fluffernutters? That would be wingnuts who work in the porn industry?

No, no, no. Fluffernutters are the ones who verbally fellate the Pretzeldent.

Back somewhere in the mid 1990’s, I think it was 1994, I took my son and daughter to see the movie “Homeward Bound.”

OK, stop.

The son is now 20.

The worst example of HomoWood’s corrupting influence this wing nutter can come up with is a comment by son that took place 14 years ago.

And he also has an extraordinarily vivid recollection the gumshoe incident.

Look, I’m not a parent. Maybe being a parent gives you a crystal clear recollection of everything your child does or says for decades, but my instinct is to call b.s.

pureed wingnut isn’t good enough to be called a “butter.”

It’s what a food manufacturer would label a transfatty “spread” like margarine or cheesewhiz. Come to think of it, pureed wingnut is very likely neon orange in colour.

and there’s the wingnut melt, which is a “random bag of shit” spread on toast.

Arky, my sisters are still quoting things that their kids said 14 years ago. They remember. Besides, they just dont make corrupting influences like they did back in the old days…

MzNicky: As a fellow paranoid-with-a-sense-of-humor, I assume you’re familar with Gore Vidal’s essay suggesting that “Arthur Bremer”‘s diary was actually written by E. Howard Hunt?

(Denis Lehane said in an interview, “Here in Boston, we have a tragicomic sense of history. God is a joker, and it may turn out that *you* are His punch line.”)

And the press bemoans the increasing cynicism of the population. What’s left to believe in?

Because on a Saturday evening somebody’s got to say it, Mikey:

“Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer!”

Dammit. Kenzie and Gennarro are my friends.

When they took that life under the bridge? I cried.

But tonight? Tonight’s enough.

And I’ll believe I’ll join you….

mikey

[…] Vance wins for pointing out that I saw the story at Sadly, No! Thanks, […]

I’ll let Bruce say it:

Well, now young faces grow sad and old
And hearts of fire grow cold
We swore blood brothers against the wind
Now I’m ready to grow young again
And hear your sister’s voice calling us home
Across the open yards
Well maybe we’ll cut someplace of own
With these drums and these guitars

Now on the street tonight the lights grow dim
The walls of my room are closing in
There’s a war outside still raging
You say it ain’t ours anymore to win
I want to sleep beneath
Peaceful skies in my lover’s bed
With a wide open country in my eyes
And these romantic dreams in my head

G’night, mi amigos

mikey

So, the thing with brussels sprouts is that people usually boil the crap out of them (and also they’ve been frozen for a month, or were never properly ripe, or something like that). But a couple of weeks ago, for some reason, I picked up a whole bunch of them at the farmers market, rubbed them with olive oil and a little salt, and cooked ’em up in a pan for around 5 minutes (I think with a lid part of the time, sort of steaming them partly but also browning the outside). A little salt and pepper and damn, those were good.

gbear: My understanding is that some people have a genetic trait that renders cilantro unpalatable. My father has it; the way he describes it, it clearly tastes completely different to him than to me. I, and everyone I know who enjoys cilantro, taste it as sort of a citrusy parsley taste — and it’s certainly not strong enough in any case to engender any strong dislike. Everyone I’ve spoken to who dislikes cilantro describes it as having a strong and unpleasant taste, often ‘soapy’. Is that true in your case?

The genetic trait some people have that makes cilantro unpalatable is a soul and for those of us who have one soapy does not come close to describing the taste. Scientifically speaking cilantro is simply body odor in a green leafy form proven in clinical studies to taste like it was grown in Dafydd Ab Hugh’s armpits. It’s consumed mainly by well heeled coastal elites going on about literacy rates and free healthcare under Castro while they swill their Chardonnay and simultaneously and conspicuously do not condemn Bill Ayers and cilantro is the brussel sprout of liberal fascism.

“Qu’est-ce que c’est “The Crying of Lot 49??”

A novel by Thomas Pynchon. I read it maybe twenty years ago, so the details are vague in my mind but it outlines an absurd, world-historical conspiracy extending over several centuries involving postal services.

Yeah, its some kind of a postmodern detective novel. I don’t think it is even trying to be plausible, but it is funny in parts. It also has me looking for secret signals apparently. I never had enough interest to read the Da Vinci Code, but I think its the same kind of thing.

cilantro is the brussel sprout of liberal fascism.

I do a lot of Indian and Andean cooking, so give me so misshapen tits and a finger mustache and call me Hitler.

“Do they go to church tomorrow and sneer at the message of hope, redemption, and forgiveness from the pulpit?”

Yes.

Another edition of short answers to simple questions.

I’ve had enough of the constant bashing of the most experienced and progressive candidate in the Democratic field. That candidate is Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton.

But the male-dominated blogosphere has constantly bashed her and worked hand-in-arm with the Republican hate machine to try and bring her down.

Barack Obama is a lightweight who won’t win, because he has no achievements and no real clue as to how to defeat the Republican machine.

Obama has never faced hard scrutiny from Republicans or their media. If he is the nominee, they will destroy him by bringing up all the flaws in his life and all the questions, such as about his real ethnic heritage.

Hillary Clinton recieved more negative grief for sincere emotion than he did for his constant plagirism.

In a head to head matchup, I guarantee that McCain breaks 350EV on Obama.

But, if McCain faced Senator Clinton, she would win over 400 electoral votes. Losing only the deep south (Mississippi to South Carolina), the Deep west (Montana, Wyoming, the Dakotas, Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas, Utah), Alaska, and Indiana. She wins 34 states, Obama loses 38 states.

Obama is a certain loser, and a lot of feminists will not vote for him because they want to see a woman president in the next 20 years.

Obama is a cromagnon who believes that women are inferior to men and there’s no real reason for us to support him.

Obama’s primary success so far has been built on a coalition of Republicans and fringe Democrats. The Republicans are voting for him in order to pick the weakest possible candidate.

Clinton’s primary coalition is Democrats.

Obama’s campaign talks about hope, but then lies about Clinton on NAFTA and Universal Health Care.

Obama’s health care stance is virtually the same as John McCain’s!

Obama also votes the same way as McCain 40% of the time in the Senate. So it’s no wonder that he’s so conservative.

America needs Hillary to be the nominee because she is the only one who will defeat John McCain. She is the only one who will fight to defeat McCain and the Bush regime.

Obama can’t sweet talk his way into the Presidency. He doesn’t have the facts or plans to impress America.

He’s a Music Man, scamming Democratic primary voters, but let’s hope that he doesn’t ruin America by getting the nomination and losing.

Obama’s primary success so far has been built on a coalition of Republicans and fringe Democrats. The Republicans are voting for him in order to pick the weakest possible candidate.

Primaries, much like windmills, do not work that way.

In any case, it’s nice to see Gary’s spreading himself out to adopt new identities just as stitled and talking-point focused as himself. It was getting tiring with just one idiot troll undergoing personality-fragmentation.

Yeah but BartCop’s cool and he says the same stuff. I don’t know what to do.

Oh sorry, forgot to say the shorters were marvelous, as ever.

“Obama is a certain loser, and a lot of feminists will not vote for him because they want to see a woman president in the next 20 years.”

Shit, when did they extend presidential terms to twenty years?

Well, this is certainly new. Wingnut trolls deciding that they’re bored with the same boiler-plate, blanket attacks on the DFHs, and now singling out Obama, because they’re so shit scared of him? Did you know that he’s BLACK?! And that his name is similar to various bad people? Scandalous!

Ann Laurie: I’m not familiar with that Gore Vidal essay, but I’ll look it up. Gore Vidal rox.

Scientifically speaking cilantro is simply body odor in a green leafy form proven in clinical studies to taste like it was grown in Dafydd Ab Hugh’s armpits.

Hey lawnguylander, that’s an eerily accurate description of what Brussels sprouts taste like to those of us who despise them! Cilantro, on the other hand, I liked until everyone and her mamma started puttin’ the dad-blamed thing into everything they made.

Ira Allen: You misspelled “plagiarism.” Sorta detracts from your point, which is central, I know. May wanna fix that before your next spamming round.

And by the way, leave “the feminists” out of your racist rants, douchebag.

One thing I’ve noticed from the DLC attacks on Obama is they’re saying:

1) He’s getting too many of his votes from independents and Republicans.
2) He’s too liberal.
3) Therefore he can’t win.

Seems to me you can’t have 3), if you’re arguing both 1) and 2).

1) He’s getting too many of his votes from independents and Republicans.

Because the DLC would never pander to Republicans, would they?

When Harold Ford, Jr. walked onto the Quick Center stage for his OPEN Visions forum he knew whose district he was standing in.

“There is not a better Congressman in Washington than Chris Shays,” said Ford, to a crowd of about 600 Fairfield University students and community members.

“No national legislator has been to Iraq more times than Chris Shays.”

Real salsa is chopped tomatoes, onions, jalepenos and cilantro, so I’ve come to love the taste. It’s used a lot in Tex-Mex.

One of my kids took part in a research study on brassica and taste buds. Evidently there’s a chemical in them that only some people can taste, making them bitter to some people but not others.

As for Clinton, I’m torn. She’s tough enough for the job.She’s learned to deal with the Republican destruction machine. If Obama wins, they’ll tear him down daily, and I don’t know yet if he can effectively govern under those circumstances. But there’s some things I don’t like about her, starting with Iraq.

I think I’ve donated to Jim Himes for the 2008 campaign (I should write that stuff down someplace!).

Chris Shays serves on the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee. But instead of using his position to actually conduct oversight of private security contractors in Iraq and ask the tough questions that his job demands, he has been using it to relentlessly defend the Bush Administration and effusively praise witnesses like the CEO of Blackwater USA:

Yeah but Ira, Obama got to be an Illinois senator and a U.S. Senator without having to be married to a former president…

So Ira could you possibly debunk this email a friend sent? I’ve checked some of it but I admit I haven’t spent hours on it.

====
Let’s take a closer look at who’s really qualified and or who’s really working for the good of all of us in the Senate. Obama or Clinton.

These bills can be found on the website of the Library of Congress thomas.loc.gov

========
Clinton

Senator Clinton, who has served only one full term – 6yrs. – and another year campaigning, has managed to author and pass into law – 20 – twenty pieces of legislation in her first six years.

These bills can be found on the website of the Library of Congress thomas.loc.gov , but to save you trouble, I’ll post them here for you.

1. Establish the Kate Mullany National Historic Site.
2. Support the goals and ideals of Better Hearing and Speech Month.
3. Recognize the Ellis Island Medal of Honor.
4. Name courthouse after Thurgood Marshall.
5. Name courthouse after James L. Watson.
6. Name post office after Jonn A. O’Shea.
7. Designate Aug. 7, 2003, as National Purple Heart Recognition Day.
8. Support the goals and ideals of National Purple Heart Recognition Day.
9. Honor the life and legacy of Alexander Hamilton on the bicentennial of his death.
10. Congratulate the Syracuse Univ. Orange Men’s Lacrosse Team on winning the championship.
11. Congratulate the Le Moyne College Dolphins Men’s Lacrosse Team on winning the championship.
12. Establish the 225th Anniversary of the American Revolution Commemorative Program.
13. Name post office after Sergeant Riayan A. Tejeda.
14. Honor Shirley Chisholm for her service to the nation and express condolences on her death.
15. Honor John J. Downing, Brian Fahey, and Harry Ford, firefighters who lost their lives on duty. Only five of Clinton’s bills are, more substantive.
16. Extend period of unemployment assistance to victims of 9/11.
17. Pay for city projects in response to 9/11
18. Assist landmine victims in other countries.
19. Assist family caregivers in accessing affordable respite care.
20. Designate part of the National Forest System in Puerto Rico as protected in the wilderness preservation system.

There you have it, the fact’s straight from the Senate Record.

=============
Obama

During the first – 8 – eight years of his elected service he sponsored over 820 bills. He introduced

233 regarding healthcare reform, 125 on poverty and public assistance, 112 crime fighting bills, 97 economic bills, 60 human rights and anti-discrimination bills, 21 ethics reform bills, 15 gun control, 6 veterans affairs and many others.

NY TImes Obama’s record in the Illinois Senate http://www.nytimes.com/imagepages/2007/07/29/us/politics/20070730_OBAMA_GRAPHIC.html

His first year in the U.S. Senate, he authored 152 bills and co- sponsored another 427. These included:

1. The Coburn-Obama Government Transparency Act of 2006 – became law,
2. The Lugar-Obama Nuclear Non-proliferation and Conventional Weapons Threat Reduction Act, – became law,
3. The Comprehensive Immigration Reform Act, passed the Senate,
4. The 2007 Government Ethics Bill, – became law,
5. The Protection Against Excessive Executive Compensation Bill, In committee, and many more.

In all, since entering the U.S. Senate, Senator Obama has written 890 bills and co-sponsored another 1096.
====

Re: The Crying of Lot 49:

At about 150 pages, it is approximately 0.05% the length of any other Pynchon novel, making it perhaps his most finishable work. It is a paean to the conspiracy theories of the late 1960’s, rendered with wit and humor. It is a briefer and somewhat more mainstream approach to the paranoia of the Illuminatus! trilogy, with less focus on the drugs and sex and more on what it’s like to slowly find out about the things going on behind the scenes of our everyday world.

It is also the original source of Yoyodyne Industries, which featured so prominently in Buckaroo Banzai.

I go back every couple of years and reread it. It takes about a minute and a half to get through, and it’s always a pleasure.

Yo Anna Comnena,

I like your work. Then and now.

Sadly, there is no comic exaggeration in your post. They really are that pathetic. Worse job in the world: wingnut blogger.

Look, I’m not a parent. Maybe being a parent gives you a crystal clear recollection of everything your child does or says for decades, but my instinct is to call b.s.

No, the gumshoe/”Homeward Bound” incident, has the distinct feel of one of those “parental anecdotes” that a parent tells over and over and over and over again to prove some salient point. Usually, it’s to illustrate a essential personality characteristic of your child. In his case, it appears to illustrate an essential grievance he has against the rest of the world.

We went to a new joint last night, and I had the mixed grill.

Redbeans and rice on one side, red cabbage slaw on the other, with cajun bbq sauce and ‘Vampire’s Blood’ for dippin’…. not a b-sprout in sight, and a nice, complex, lingering spice in the mouth that faded pleasantly under the several microbrews we had later at a friend’s housewarming party…. we believed in a better world, for a while.

At least until I woke up to Charlie Sykes on my TV machine and Townhall on my laptop.

Ewww. Can I exchange this country? I think it’s gone bad.

Dan Someone-
Afraid I have to disagree. Yoyodyne showed up in V., which was his first novel.

re, the crying of Lot 49

I’m with Dan on this, weird, funny, odd, in places, but compared to some of his other books, not too much of an effort. After over a year I am still struggling through Gravity’s Rainbow. Don’t get me wrong, its good stuff, but hells bells, its an effort.

I’m with Dan on this, weird, funny, odd, in places, but compared to some of his other books, not too much of an effort.

That’s a fine piece of short fiction, and very deep.

Comments on Hugh Hewitt’s column are HILARIOUS! Check out this concern troll, ApolloSpeaks:

“According to the strict interpretation of Islamic law Barrack Hussein Obama born of a Moslem father is an apostate from Islam: a capital crime punishable by death as Obama is a practicing Christian. According to Islamic law Obama’s Moslem father obligates him to practice Islam and no other religion. This makes Obama an enemy of Allah and his prophet, a repudiation of fundamental Islamic values and beliefs. In other words, an Obama presidency would be seen as an affront and insult to Moslems worldwide and be exploited by Jihadists to energize their movement and win over new recruits.

“Worse still, with the Iranian parliament on the verge of passing an Apostate Law-making apostasy a capital state crime in accordance with Sharia-there is no way that the mullahs could hold direct, open talks with Obama or any member of his administration. For such talks would be seen by the Moslem world as legitimizing Obama’s apostasy thus bringing ridicule, contempt and shame upon the mullah regime. As the mullahs are trying to win over Moslems to its brand of Shiite Islam negotiations with Obama would defeat their purpose and be a public relations disaster.

“To be sure, if Obama should win in November his inauguration will be marked by massive anti-US demonstrations in all major Moslem cities calling for the death of the US and its newly elected president. As US relations with Islam is bad enough we simply cannot afford four years of Barack Hussein Obama.”

Funniest thing I’ve read all day.

As US relations with Islam is bad enough we simply cannot afford four years of Barack Hussein Obama.

Um, yeah.

He’s a stealth-Moslem non-Moslem fascist communist Christian atheist liberal terrorist appeaser of terrorists, is what I’m gathering from all I hear. It gets hard to keep track.

Ownbear, you obviously don’t know the real Hillary Clinton or you would not have asked that question. Rather than post 35 years of her tirelessly working for not only women and children of all races and colors, but American people period. I am just going to give you a little background info on my hero. She has been there for us, and I, if no other person of color will, stand up for her when she need us most. http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/05/us/politics/05clinton.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

Barack Obama is an opportunist, a divider, and more importantly he is not qualified for the office of President of the United States. I believe that he may win the nomination, but I know that he will not win the Presidency. If you think that I will gloat when he lose, you don’t know me as well. I love my country, and my party, but we are making a huge mistake, and the Republicans will capitalize on it in November. When the Obama camp cry racism at least it will truly be justified time. The Republicans will not wait for lunch, they are going to eat his breakfast.

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/05/us/politics/05clinton.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

When the Obama camp cry racism at least it will truly be justified time.

Oh well done.

I think Bozell’s anecdote is intended to illustrate that Hollywood made his child aware of the existence of butts. In a family film, no less! Why, in his day, nobody knew what a butt was until their wedding night!

Yes, that statement’s a beaut.

Our voting choice has so many variables that I think people tend to make it much more simple, and let emotions make their decisions. Take Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Conservatives might have basic needs met but don’t feel safe and secure. (It’s an authority thing.) Liberals feel safe but don’t have as strong (and cultivated) sense of belonging, which might be a factor in Obama’s popularity; he gives them that. There’s nothing fascists or religious about that; it’s just that both also take advantage of that need. (Jonah gets it wrong, but he should be used to that.)

Some people make it to the top, but many don’t.

tnautry, Senator Clinton is a Republican. A “Moderate” Republican to be sure but STILL, a Republican.

That Times biography confirms that opinion for me.

And please spare us the “Not Qualified” for the job shtick? I’ve already stated my beliefs on that subject.

“I couldn’t believe that he was seriously arguing that, so I had to check for myself.”

Pedestrian, I did the same thing, and I still don’t believe it.

I’m praying that Jon Sanders is playing an Alan Sokal style prank on Townhall, to show how lax their standards are.

For those of you who don’t click through to read every entry, not only is that shorter summary completely lacking in exageration or humorous paraphrasing, Jon manages to make his case even worse by the quote he uses to make his point:

“But, you know, there’s something deeper in this argument we’ve been hearing about inspiration. It really has to do with the meaning of peanut butter. Some of you know I talk about peanut butter a lot. And it’s not surprising, because, if you think about it, the odds of me standing here are very slim.

And so I talk about peanut butter. I put peanut butter on my signs. I gave a speech in Boston at the convention about peanut butter. I wrote a book called The Audacity of Peanut Butter.”

That’s what he leads with: A quote where the term “hope” does, in fact, have an obvious, specific meaning that’s inherent to the story Obama is telling.

Cripes.

I’m not sure you should put the words “Hugh Hewitt” and “tit” in the same post.

http://www.sadlyno.com/wordpress/uploads/2006/12/hewittits.jpg

Read Ford’s statement on the Shays comments here: http://haroldfordjr2006.blogspot.com/2008/02/ford-statement-on-shays-comments.html

Question: did Jon Sanders have a craving for peanut butter when he wrote that, or something?

K-Lo on Tweety’s ambush of Kirk Watson:

The poor local pol\’s answer was instructive (and accurate): “Well, I’m not going to be able to name you specific items of legislative accomplishments.”

Accurate? Yeah, sure. And I’m Elvis Presley\’s love-child!

[…] fine folks at Sadly, No! have done it again with their latest Two Minute TownHall. I just wanted to add my two cents on a couple of the screeds […]