What? no bong? For shame.

OOOOO!!!!! A TEA SET!!!!

Kettle?

My bedroom offers all that stuff to guests except I don’t charge anyone to watch TV and I don’t have a frat boy with a bottle of booze sitting on the toilet.

Automatic douche…so if you’re just sitting there taking a crap, you get jets of water up the ass, whether you wnat them or not?

If they offer pot, then they should also offer a bar stocked with potato chips instead of booze, and an alternate checkout time of whenever.

pay tv AND tv? That’s living!

Automatic douche…so if you’re just sitting there taking a crap, you get jets of water up the ass, whether you wnat them or not?

They found that “automatic” tested better in focus groups than “mandatory” or “compulsory.”

So…pot included in every room…maybe we ARE moving towards Jonah’s nightmare of America being one big college campus.

Teh totalitarian temptation from Roosevelt to room service.

Where is this? Knowing where would influence my decision about whether to bring my own chronic.

There’s a fancy Sushi restaurant in West Seattle that has a toilet in the women’s restroom that has a control panel on the side.

It heats the seat, spritzes, and then blows dry.

Those crazy Japanese!

So Jonah Goldberg comes with every toilet?

I am deeply offended at the thought that Doughy Pantload could be mistaken for one of us!

Sir! You have offended Mah Family Honor!

I am so chagrinned that I didn’t actually use the bidet my hotel in Chicago was equipped with.

When my first wife and I were looking at apartments in Brooklyn, the rental agent took us to one (which we subsequently did rent), saying that the owners were decorators. “Do you know what they put in the bathroom?” she asked dramatically. “A dais!”

(She meant bidet. I had fantasies of giving speeches in the bathroom, but it was not to be.)

pot included in every room…maybe we ARE moving towards Jonah’s nightmare of America being one big college campus.

Teh totalitarian temptation from Roosevelt to room service.

hilarious!

Not a well known fact, but about fifteen years ago Logitech was considering producing a line of heated toilet seats with jets of warm water and blow dry. A friend of mine was a VP there at the time and had one of the prototypes.

Damn thing sprayed water everywhere but where it was, er, needed most.

Also I was in vegas once with a thug from chicago doing a deal for a thousand blank cook county birth certs. He’d never been anywhere, and we had no trouble convincing him the bidet was a drinking fountain.

He thought it was functionally retarded, but he used the damn thing…

mikey

So Jonah Goldberg comes with every toilet?

Please don’t ever make me think of that again. Thank you.

Okay, that made me laugh!

Mitt Romney came with the toilet?

Well, I guess it beats the:

Best Buy Inn
Dr BLT copyright 2007
http://www.drblt.net/music/BBInn.mp3

where baby Jesus is no longer welcome at Christmastime.

You folsk set me up for that, when this is the one I really wanted to drop:

Bashin’ Bush is so Last Year
Dr BLT
copyright 2008 Right-wing Records
http://www.drblt.net/music/BushBashDemo.mp3

copyright 2008 Right-wing Records

Imagine the hordes of thieves eager to steal surefire hits who have been dissuaded by this stern notice.

One man’s trash is another man’s treasure, Righteous. Are you among the nearly 2000 that downloaded Playin’ Politics with the Dixie Chicks last year. C’mon, you can admit it.

That’s what I thought. Your silence speaks volumes.

Big deal. THIS Holiday Inn offers TIE-UP PARKING LOT. And…satellite channel!

http://web.travel.rakuten.co.jp/portal/my/info_page_e.Eng?f_no=408

I am planning to stay at a Howard Johnsons Express on my impending bizness trip.

And yes, a toilet is one of the amenities!

No mention of pot, however.

So Jonah Goldberg comes with every toilet?

/Contemplates changing “with” to “in.”

Nah.

I did in fact stay in a Holiday Inn last night. No pot or auto-douche, though. It did have a lovely view of the Gulf. I imagine that had I really needed some pot, the sketchy guy hanging out by the pool could have hooked me up.

That’s what I thought. Your silence speaks volumes.

Maybe he just thinks your a putz and doesn’t feel like getting into it with you.

“I am so chagrinned that I didn’t actually use the bidet my hotel in Chicago was equipped with.”

I used the bidet, but my chagrin was that the turd I dropped in it would not flush away.

Shucks, mine just came with the ol’ fashioned manual kind . . .

“Big deal. THIS Holiday Inn offers TIE-UP PARKING LOT. And…satellite channel!”

I’m still holding out for a hotel that offers complimentary riding crops along with that Godiva truffle when they turn down the bed at night.

But, can you see the TV from the autobidet? (And is there a place to set the tea?)

So Jonah Goldberg comes with every toilet?

If CafePress were serious, they’d offer a line of JohnnyCake holders.