Shorter Glenn Reynolds

STRATEGYPAGE: “Al Qaeda appears to be moving its main effort to Afghanistan, after operations in Iraq, North Africa, Somalia and Europe (not to mention North America) have all largely failed. But continued Taliban activity in Pakistan and Afghanistan has provided al Qaeda with one area where they might be able to have a little success. But that will require a change in methods.”
posted at 05:09 PM by Glenn Reynolds

  • The National Intelligence Estimate for Iran is questionable, but the unattributed speculations at this combination military news and wargame site seem pretty good.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.


Comments: 28


“The al-Qaeda buildup in Afghanistan is of great concern for the safety of the free world. Now watch me frag this noob!”


So the fact the assorted, disaffected Saudi Arabian drove planes into the WTC, the Pentagon and some Pennsylvania farmland means that they failed in north America?

Does that mean that the twin towers are secretly being hidden in Giuliani’s ass? That some 3-thousand odd human beings are really alive and living in Ann Coulter’s basement?

These fucksticks think that AQ just showed up one day in 2001, and from there really took off. Just so happens that AQ comes from the same areas they have retreated to, and not without the assistance of this current administration.


God help me if I ever need a lawyer and he’s the only one available


I know a country that’s changed it’s methods in Afghanistan many times.

How we doing?


This story, taken from a blog that has a toy store and a jokes section.


StrategyPage is a never-ending source of semi-coherent unhinged wingnuttery. I’m surprised y’all haven’t covered it more often. (Speaking of which, where’s the ChronWatch love?)


The U.S. is offering the potentially anti-al Qaeda tribes weapons, equipment and other aid. This might work, as the Afghan tribes are amenable to gifts

Yes, everyone knows that the Afghans race is +20 greed and -10 magic. However, they are also +30 courage, making them excellant frontline combatants for the Americans (+50 intelligence).


Afghans Afghani
excellant excellent.

What would I do without preview?


I’m surprised that Reynolds didn’t link to this:

Al Qaeda in Iraq has not been defeated, but its end is near. Start planning your AQI Victory party now.

Wooo hooo, a victory party? Can it be on a big ship or something… maybe an aircraft carrier. And the president could land on that carrier with a big banner that said “Mission Accomplished” and I could bring tacos. (Tacos are the food for victory celebrations over AQI).


Earth to Perfesser Corndog: Some 50 percent of Afghanistan is now controlled by the Taliban; the Northwest frontier of nuclear Pakistan is firmly in the hands of al Qaeda. And Iraq? Um. . . .Mission Accomplished!

Dumb shits.


Hello. Is this thing on? Tap tap.


There seem to have been some technical difficulties, comments-wise.

Let me pick up where I left off. Shouldn’t the official food of “Victory over AQI” be something American, like a corndog, or pemmican, or a beaver tail?


They’re crunchy shelled tacos with ground beef and orange powder inside. Can’t get much more American than that.


That’s what the pros call regurgitation.


The U.S. is offering the potentially anti-Russian tribes weapons, equipment and other aid. This might work, as the Afghan tribes are amenable to gifts
Fixed in the interests of nostalgia.


Doctorb, you are correct. What we know as “Mexican” food is indeed a border concoction. Tex-Mex, baby!!


But what we really need is a “Victory over AEI” celebration.


I still say that serving tacos encourages illegal activities.



Wargame site, my arse. Everyone knows you can’t use the Middle East as a start for a successful world campaign. You have to start with Australia and then move into Siam. Those 2 extra armies per turn come in handy! Come on triple 6!


I say we attack the Basques next. I mean, you never really know. Bush could lead the air assault just like in that movie “Independence Day”. News ratings would go through the roof, man!


You have to start with Australia and then move into Siam.

Maybe if you are a liberal pussy. I go straight for North America.

Alaska, Greenland, and Mexico is all that I have to defend and I get 5. Plus I can pick off Iceland and Kamchatka for cards without stretching my defenses, then sweep through South America to Brazil and West Africa.



Yeah, um, so at what point did AQ move their base of operation to Iraq and when did… oh never mind, there is no use is there?


I say we attack the Basques next. I mean, you never really know.

Actually, we DO know that they’re terrorists/terrorist harborers(ETA), so bombs away*! I’m hoping for a scene more like the infamous Slim Pickens’ one in Dr. Strangelove, though. It would suit Shrubya perfectly.

*Bombing Basques bad! Bad!


Pfft. Doing the Australia-Siam gambit is like putting a hotel on Baltic Avenue. Sure, you have a hotel, but so what? It’s not going to bring anybody to their knees.


The good news is that Al Qaeda cannot launch any of their rust buckets equipped with EMP-weapon-launching devices from Afghanistan.


Aww, shit. More Cheetos stained 101st Chairborne recliner Pattons. Look fellas, I like Command and Conquer and Starcraft as much as anyone. I’ve tons of movies and T.V. shows featuring giant wars for the fate humanity. Guess what? That doesn’t make me an expert in global political and military strategy. I’m going to guess it doesn’t make you experts either. So why should I care about your baseless ruminations? Why should I believe it when you tell me “Al-Queda” has failed? You weren’t saying “Mission Accomplished” in 2003 were you? If you were, why should you have any credibility about this?

Aww forget it. Anyone with “News As History” as the slogan for their wargamer site isn’t worth the trouble.


I say we attack the Basques next
What for? Criminal negligee?
Clothing hater. Closet sadist.


I like the Strategy Page. Of course considering the unsourced unsubstantiated nature of his posts, and the largely speculative subjects, and the frequency with which he spreads wingnut bullshit talking points, i consider his blogposts merely speculative, and look to clue me in to trends with which I might not otherwise be aware. lots of garbage. And on the plus side for a wingnut site, it doesnt go out of its way to be gratuitously insulting to the left.
Still, lots of nutery. Definetly.


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