My Pet President, part II

Amanda alerts us to the fact that Amazon took down the customer reviews for My Pet Goat we’d written about here.

Sadly, we only have those reviews we quoted saved. If anyone out there has more, we’d love to put together a post that includes as many of them as possible. The current reviews are in the extended entry.

Bestes book in da worl!, July 15, 2004
Reviewer: A reader
I think this is the bestes book in da worl! I was lef thinkin for seven minutes caus this book is soooo cooool. I wanna read it again and again and I don care if the whole worl is attac. This is the coooolest book eva!

Presidential material, through and through!, July 6, 2004
Reviewer: Lolla Fallujah (Hannah Storm’s house)
After reading the enclosed story “The Pet Goat,” I was stunned by its lyrical beauty and easy cadence. The tempo, the choice of words, and the layout on each page captured my imagination so much that it took me about seven minutes to recover my bearings.


Comments: 6


The Poor Man has at least one.


I’m confused….the quotes are back on Amazon

Those are (afaik) new reviews being posted by, uh, terrorists. Or something.


Here’s one (I knew I should’ve whacked them all while I had a chance):
I wish you’d have given me this written question ahead of time so I could plan for it.
I’m sure historians will look back and say, gosh, the goat could’ve done it better this way or that way. You know, I just – I’m sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this book review, with all the pressure of trying to come up with answer, but it hadn’t yet.

The goat would’ve gone into Afghanistan the way he went into Afghanistan. Even knowing what he knows today about the stockpiles of weapons, the goat still would’ve called upon the world to deal with Saddam Hussein.

See, I’m of the belief that the goat will find out the truth on the weapons. That’s why the goat sent up the independent commission. The goat looks forward to hearing the truth as to exactly where they are. They could still be there. They could be hidden, like the 50 tons of mustard gas in a goat farm.

One of the things that the goat talked about was that he was surprised of the level of intimidation he found amongst people who should know about weapons and their fear of talking about them because they don’t want to be killed.

You know, there’s this kind of – there’s a terror still in the soul of some of the people in Iraq. They’re worried about getting killed, and therefore they’re not going to talk. But it’ll all settle out. The goat will find out the truth about the weapons at some point in time.

However, the fact that he had the capacity to make them bothers the goat today just like it would have bothered the goat then. He’s a dangerous man. He’s a man who actually not only had weapons of mass destruction – the reason the goat can say that with certainty is because he used them.

And the goat has no doubt in his mind that he would like to have inflicted harm, or paid people to inflict harm, or trained people to inflict harm, on America, because he hated us.

I hope – I don’t want to sound like the goat has made no mistakes. I’m confident he has. I just haven’t – you just put me under the spot here, and maybe I’m not as quick on my feet as I should be in coming up with one.



From the wonders of tabbed browsing, I put the first 50 of 53 reviews available Sunday night up on a blind link at:

My apologies to the authors of the other 3 reviews. Please grab this file & use it to your own ends rather than link to it.


I saved the first 25 of them — will send to you via email.


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