Shorter Charles Krauthammer
Posted on November 2nd, 2007 by Travis G.
Above: ‘Kiss of Death’ (1947), featuring Richard Widmark.
- Perhaps it’s not even legal for Hillary Clinton to serve another term in the White House.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.
Yes, but considering that Grapthar’s Kraphammer ends up recommending that Bill Clinton, First Husband, avoid weird conflicts of an ex-president in the White House by having Hillary spirit Bill down to Argentina as some sort of ambassador is not likely to be opposed by one Bill Clinton.
I.e., “Please, please Hillary, don’t throw me in that thar briar patch of Argentina, so so far away from Washington and from you, surrounded by all those terrible mean pretty I mean horrid Argentinian women.”
Legal? This is America!
Bill back in the White House? Got my vote.
I think it’s cute when criminals and sociopaths speculate as to the legality of anything. Kraphammer isn’t qualified to opine about any matter more substantial than the city code of parking enforcement (and probably only really tiny cities).
So the Clintons have a strained, strange relationship, yet they will rule together like they share the same brain? The Wookie defense makes more sense than that.
did he just take one of his old column’s about hilarty as first laday and cut and paste switch everything for TEH CLENIS?
My favorite bit of nastiness in a very nasty column:
Which I read like this: Hillary Clinton is a failed wife; Bill Clinton is failed husband. Their staying together sullies the institution of marriage and renders them unfit to serve as President and First Husband.
They pay this asshole money to write that tripe?
Shorter Krautie:
Clenis! Hitlery! Argentina! CLENIS!!!1!
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. 😉
Hey! where’d my subscript go?
It’s not illegal if the president does it!
Yes, it’s just that simple.
Do Americans really want a historically unique two-headed presidency constantly buffeted by the dynamics of a highly dysfunctional marriage?
We much prefer the dysfunctional father-son relationship we’ve got in the presidency now, is that it?
Do Americans really want a historically unique two-headed presidency
It’s better than a no-headed presidency.
“Duh, is our children learning? Duh, Iran is part of an Axis of Evil!”
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. 😉
A big smiley face sticker for t4toby. Always cite your sources, even for genres of blog posts!
We much prefer the dysfunctional father-son relationship we’ve got in the presidency now, is that it?
For Krauthammer, yes. From his article:
I’ll have to remember this the next time my dad visits and we sit down to eat dinner together.
“Do Americans really want a historically unique two-headed presidency constantly buffeted by the dynamics of a highly dysfunctional marriage?”
Hmmm, that doesn’t seem to have bothered Charles in W and Dick’s case. And they’re not EVEN thinking about the children.
It seems to me that the only way that a woman can actually hold power is as a cunning, shadowy, usurper, as did Hillary during Bill’s presidency.
Were she to actually win an election, Hillary would immediately become the puppet of her husband and male relatives.
Thanks, J.
I think.
It was supposed to be extra small, to illuminate the snark, but WordPress failed me. I don’t understand why the preview is more tolerant to HTML than the actual post.
Thanks, J.
I think.
Do think. I like the Shorter concept attribution in Sadly, No!’s shorter posts, especially when it annoys people.
Well, we just need to pass legislation mandating that Bill Clinton only appear in rubber or latex. Problem solved.
I for one certainly hope it is not legal for Hillary Satan to serve another term in the white house. Hilldog is the closest thing we have in this country to a European style socialist as evidenced by her plans for “Hillary Care”, and $5000 baby bonds. She is definately in the pocket of that treasonous dog George Soros.
We seem to be of one mind on that. If it slightly irritates people, I’m usually in favor of it.
I would have quit using the attribution long ago if it didn’t annoy people.
That picture is so wrong and yet so right.
saul exhibits all the intellectual capacity of someone home-schooled by baboons.
Two wet suits?
I don’t know how we’re ever going to be able to compete with the Mallard Fillmoresque sharpness of saul’s wit. Let’s jusr declare Fred Thompson, I mean Fred Satan, president right now.
Ha ha. I called him Fred Satan. In your face, conservatives!
TWO highly intelligent and competent people in the White House? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Better one incompetent boob.
BTW, why didn’t the Repubs complain about this Bush-Clinton-Bush-Clinton thing in 2000? 2004?
I’m more and more convinced that saul is either a precocious15 year old, or a learning disabled 25 year old. either way, he loves banana cream pie.
Someone should send kraphammer a card of appreciation for reminding the public that by electing Hillary we would also put Bill back in the Whitehouse . Contrary to the thinking of the infantile minds on the right, most americans will view this as positive rather than negative,
thank you charlie for all you help although not intended. Perhaps you keep forgetting that one should think before writing , a common flaw of the flawed right.
“saul exhibits all the intellectual capacity of someone home-schooled by baboons.”
I see no reason to impugn the intellectual capacities of banoons.
Sons = OK
Wives = Badbadbad
Caveat! IOKIYAR
Silly Cymon Dendu.
The problem is William Jefferson Clinton, former president of the United States, commander in chief of the Armed Forces, George Washington’s representative on earth.
George Washington’s representative on earth??!?! For fuck’s sake, Chuck, that wouldn’t even get accepted in an essay competition in Parade Magazine.
The relationship between a father and an adult son is psychological and abstract; the connection between husband and wife, concrete and quotidian.
I suspect that Bill & Hill have had very little “concrete” contact since…hmm…the mid-1970s or so.
Problem solved.
For Krauthammer, yes. From his article: [quote]
Aha, thanks. I couldn’t bring myself to go read the thing.
I had to go look up “quotidian”, too. Krauthammer must be teh smrt because he used it correctly (or maybe misused it in a way that happened to make sense).
The relationship between a father and an adult son is psychological and abstract; […]
OK, I’ll concede this one. I think it was Dubya’s relationship with his mother that really caused the concrete, quotidian scars.
But we have a two headed Presdency right now – Granted one of heads does not have a brain but that doesn’t matter since Cheney makes all the decisions. At least with Bill Hillary both brains would be working organs
bob
saul is also anti-semite fro hating george soros
“I suspect that Bill & Hill have had very little “concrete” contact since…hmm…the mid-1970s or so.”
Why suspect that? For one thing, it buys into the bullshit rightwing narrative that the Clintons have a loveless, barren, sham marriage that is maintained only for the pursuit of power. For another, it assumes that grownups don’t come to certain understandings in their marriages. I know more than one (happy, long-married) couple in an open relationship; Bill and Hillary got married in the Swinging Seventies. Who’s to say Hillary knew what Bill liked right out of the starting gate? And even that buys into the bullshit rightwing narrative of Bill Clinton as sexual glutton. Fuck a bunch of that (no pun intended).
I think the reason there wasn’t a whole lot of screeching in 2000 about the dynastic implications of a second Bush president was this: So many real and obvious problems with the man himself made it completely unnecessary to indulge in ridiculous sophistry.
Krauthammer, being a conservative, has nothing else but sophistry and logical fallacies in his rhetorical arsenal. Don’t believe me? Pick an article at random and read it. Case closed.
Maureen Dowd is almost as bad, but at least she’s funny.
SamFromUtah-
I, as well, had to once again consult my Two Dollar Word Dictionary to see WTF that meant.
He doesn’t have a superiority complex. I promise.
Hoosier, I think the (D) after his name makes that highly unlikely.
No, George Soros is an anti-semite for not supporting Christ’s-choice-for-president and the heir-to-the-prophet-Reagan, George W. Bush.
Geez, don’t you learn about religions before you start making broad claims about them?
The best part is the cognitive dissonance generated by the fact that Bill and Hillary have done whatever it takes to remain together and respect the sanctity of marriage. They’re doing a lot better than Newt, or Rudy, etc, etc, etc…
Suck on that, social conservatives.
Suck on that, social conservatives.
I told you you had one chance left to even prove you were part of the human race. You’ve run out of chances. And I won’t hesitate to report you to our FBI, even though you’re in India. Got it asswipe? It’s obvious you can dish it out but you’re nowhere near man enough to take it. I have the entire record.
I could prove that I am part of the human race, but I have a date with a Feministislamopopulist.
Just remember the old rule of thumb when dating anyone named Beth:
Conservatives suck, Liberals swallow.
I know which one I would like to pole.
About their opinions, of course!
Krauthammer, being a psychologist, has nothing else but sophistry and logical fallacies in his rhetorical arsenal.
Amended.
Hey Sadly, No! guys and gals. None, and I do mean none of the YouTube content you’ve embedded in your page is working. All of them say, “This video is no longer available.” What’s the story with that?
Sorry to be off topic, but I didn’t see anywhere else to tell you this…
Schumer gives the thumb up to torture: http://talkingpointsmemo.com/
I do mean none of the YouTube content you’ve embedded in your page is working.
Ah, the retribution of Jeebus is finally upon us. Repent sinners! Repent!
?? Still works when I try it.
CAH-LEEEEEEE-NISSSSSSSSSSSSssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssharrrkkkgllll
That picture is so, so awesome.
Uh what???
Ummm? Yeah, not quite Chuckles.
t4toby: The ‘live preview’ copies the HTML you write directly into the preview area, as far as I can tell. I’m fairly sure you could put a little frameset in there with a million popups of goat porn, but the server would filter it out when you actually posted.
It’d be nice to get a list of tags and attributes that actually work and for that to be available somewhere near the comment box. I could probably do the grunt work on that if the Sadlynauts would be willing to insert it unto the template, yea, even unto a popup.
I’m fairly sure you could put a little frameset in there with a million popups of goat porn, but the server would filter it out when you actually posted.
The better to keep Mickey Kaus away from Sadly, No!
Bill back in the White House? Good, we’ll be back to heterosexual blowjobs in the Oval Office.
All those opposed to heterosexual blowjobs, raise your hands. Anybody? Anybody?
Tribe: “republican,” not “Republican.”
Of course, Krauthammer failed to mention Senator Prescott Bush, President George H.W. Bush, President George W. Bush, and Governor Jeb Bush. In case you’re keeping count, that’s actually more elected offices than the Kennedy family has held in the same number of generations, and twice as many presidencies.
Honestly, I wasn’t aware Americans worshipped Diana. To the extent they did, it was a mild shadow of the extent to which she was deified in Britain — and in both countries, it was something of a populist sentiment regardless, because she was seen as sort of a ‘common person’.
I dunno from worshiping, but I’m basically right there with dead Dodi. She was smokin hot, rich, great smile, sparkling eyes and you just got a sense that she’d be rollicking good fun in bed.
Hokay, that’s pretty close to worship…
mikey
OT: From a Townhall Ad
Yes! However, we don’t want to see shows Pat Boone. Funny that.
As far as the pic goes, for anyone who has not seen that movie try and catch it the next time it’s on TCM. That movie will fuck you up. Also check out this site for woodcut prints of film noir. Good stuff here. http://www.filmnoirwoodcuts.com
MIkey, she was also an anorexic aristocrat, who obsessed about her weight, thought silk frocks were great for travelling “because they don’t crease”, and spent the entire annual budget of a small country on frockage. Very shallow, in other words. Shallow and priviledged, and completely unaware of how priviledged she really was. It’s easy to look good when that’s all you’ve got to do with your life. I’d smile pretty too, if I had that much dosh.
Hysterical Woman: I’d say double beef Explicit Sex, Extra Dirty Language, hold the Sick Violence, thanks.
thought silk frocks were great for travelling “because they don’t crease”,
Ummm….is this bad? Cuz I….well, okay, there’s SOME rayon, but..
No, Krauthammer mentions Daddy Bush and Shrub, but believes that their relationship is perfectly acceptable since the not very competent father is completely ignored by his utterly incompetent son. Krauthammer seems to believe that an excessive number of reasonably capable people in the White House at the same time might unleash forces that will destroy the Republic.
MIkey, she was also an anorexic aristocrat, who obsessed about her weight,
Which is a mental illness rather than a character flaw.
On the other hand she fucked every cauliflower eared upper class prat who came her way simply to spite Charles and the rest of his family… where as Charles at least loved Camilla, and is still with her today; but still, how crap a wife must you be to lose out to Camilla?
What’s more, Diana also pretended to care about various charities purely as a public relations exercise, but then didn’t leave a penny to charity in her will; And obsessively courted the gutter press paparazzi to the point of deliberately staging “See Through Dress” moments, then howled about the horrors of that self same paparazzi intruding into her life; and eventually died due to one high speed chase too many with them, due to being too stupid or arrogant to wear a seat belt whilst her drunken driver careened regally across public roads.
I could go on; but let’s just say that the fact that even some liberal people seem to be unable to tell the difference between someone who’d actually be just the right side of crazily fun in bed, and nothing more exotic than a typically blonde bit of horsey sloane with a neurotically needy and self obsorbed/self obsessed personality, on top of which is supported at the British taxpayers expense and the ever fattening wallet of vultures like the Murdoch press… well, I’d say that’s not a phenominal argument for once for republicanism of the best sort, wouldn’t you?
That is where Craphammer makes his big mistake, George Jr. is anything but adult:
I am the decider, bwah, bwah, bwah!
I am relevant, bwah, bwah, bwah!
Gimme my dummy, bwah, bwah, bwah!
Bush Jr. never even made it out of the fucking pram!
Well, in the words of some truly great thinkers Qetesh, Duh.
I didn’t say I wanted to become her partner.
And I certainly didn’t concern myself with anything as trivial as her social-economic position in the world.
In as delicate language as possible, I said I’d like to bang her.
And, well, if she wasn’t dead? I really would. And I remain convinced that it would be rockin fun…
mikey
I’m not sure, now that I think about it, that I ever got over that eighties feathered blonde hair thing. Still makes my motor run…
mikey
‘Course, I actually think Hillary’s pretty hot too…
mikey
George Soros is a treasonous dog who wants to destroy our constitution and form a one world socialist government. That dog immigrated here from Greece long ago, Congress should vote to revoke that dog’s citizenship!
You know, in the right context, Saul is pretty funny.
They made a movie about that, y’know.
Is it just me, or is saul the most boring and all around generic wingnut troll we’ve had? His writing is just plain dull and even Rush wouldn’t touch his arguments. At least Kevin’s kinda entertaining, what with his drunkenness or mild retardation or whatever it was.
Is it just me, or is saul the most boring and all around generic wingnut troll we’ve had?
It’s not just you. The Littlest Rabbi reads like a “fortune” program farting out lines from a 2003 Limbaugh program.
Dating the Dead Dep’t.: I dunno, mikey I never got the impression Lady Di would be able to enjoy herself, let alone any one else. And as a full time shut-in, I waste an awful lot of brain cells on concepts like that.
“typically blonde bit of horsey sloane.” I do believe Mr. Kyra Sedgewick w/ Play-Doh© summed the late Lady up perfectly. “Sloane” indeed!
If Hillary gets it shouldn’t Bill be known as the “First Gentleman”?
Years of tradition and all that.
Calling him the ‘First Husband” would be really fucking sexist.
Yeah, saul isn’t even any fun to debate. Calling George Soros a dog three times in two sentences… referring to Hillary as “Hillary Satan”… ok… is he communicating in code to an Islamic terror cell or something? Because, otherwise his transmissions don’t make sense.
Saul is an idiot, without any redeeming qualities, but may well be a fourteen year old girl with bad acne, so a little slack is required…
mikey
#
Herr Doktor Bimler said,
November 2, 2007 at 23:13
“Krauthammer, being a psychologist, has nothing else but sophistry and logical fallacies in his rhetorical arsenal.
Amended.”
Arsenhole,ReAmendified.That’s better…
By the bye, that’s a mighty nice bit of photoshoppery there.
Lack of a God, what a dipstick Krauthammer is.
Wouldn’t a real Nazi spell “Heil” right?
Do we have a namespoofer?
I think the reason there wasn’t a whole lot of screeching in 2000 about the dynastic implications of a second Bush president was this: So many real and obvious problems with the man himself made it completely unnecessary to indulge in ridiculous sophistry.
I was surprised when a usually rather conservative acquaintance, an immigrant from Bangladesh, ranted in 2000 that Dubya should not be allowed to run for president. “First the father, then the son?” he explained. “This is making a prince! I came to America to get *away* from such children of privilege!”
The intertoobz were not nearly so all-encompassing then, but from the international media I could find off-line, he wasn’t the only person to find the whole Bush Dynasty meme… less than true to the American Ideal. In retrospect, of course, we should have paid more attention to our more experienced global neighbors about this.
K. Ron Silkwood said, “Bill back in the White House? Good, we’ll be back to heterosexual blowjobs in the Oval Office.”
Can we add “consensual” and “with adults” and “not for money” to this? I just want to make sure we’re really separating from the GOP.
Oh yeah, and that photoshop? Genius. I like it even better than the lollipop one.