Jonah Mom and Morgentaler*
Roy gets this right (as is his wont) in summarizing Jonah Goldberg’s latest cocktail napkin note. But he leaves us with a bit of teh stupid:
Part of my reasoning [for not being pro-choice] is politically pragmatic. Right-wing activist Grover Norquist once told NRO’s David Freddoso that anyone who can go to black-tie dinners and face the haranguing of rich donors for his pro-life stance has the backbone to support tax cuts, too. [Emphasis added]
Backbone [or sheer lunacy] is needed in order to support things that are extremely unpopular — you no more need backbone to support tax cuts than you do to announce that you love America, don’t much care for the French, or find that Canadians have a funny accent. (And we don’t mean the English-speaking ones). Having a backbone when it comes to fiscal policy looks a lot more like this. (And that).
Jonah then goes back to his award-winning act consisting of making “a very serious, thoughtful, argument that has never been made in such detail or with such care“:
But I am convinced that a baby minutes, days or weeks before full term is, simply, a baby. And despite what you constantly hear, Roe v. Wade doesn’t recognize that fact.
Roe v. Wade doesn’t recognize the fact that a baby minutes [!!!] before full term is a baby? Could you find anyone in the motherfucking United States who supports aborting a baby minutes or days before full term? Are you arguing with real people, or are you having time travel fantasies again? As for the Roe v. Wade bit, Sadly, No!
With respect to the State’s important and legitimate interest in potential life, the “compelling” point is at viability. This is so because the fetus then presumably has the capability of meaningful life outside the mother’s womb. State regulation protective of fetal life after viability thus has both logical and biological justifications. If the State is interested in protecting fetal life after viability, it may go so far as to proscribe abortion during that period, except when it is necessary to preserve the life or health of the mother. [Emphasis added]
* This post is dedicated to Canada, our home and native land. (link)
Well who cares if the ladies die on the table? Republicans don’t care about people once they’re born, silly!
I take the position that puppies and kittens are cute, and I don’t care what anybody else says!
Huzzah! for the “me, mom and morgentaler” refernece
Um, we DO remove fetuses from women’s bodies “minutes before full term”. Every day.
It’s called an “elective Caesarian section delivery”.
What’s his point again?
Yeah, cause third term abortions are, like, totally legal in most states, for any reason whatsoever.
Does he go back and read what he has written, or does he just let fly with the verbage, logic be damned?
(Rhetorical Question. I already know the answer.)
Remember when Jonah was giving Democrats credit for courage for going on Fox, and lambasting the president for his cowardice for only appearing in carefully scrutinized townhalls?
Me neither.
Like all conservatives, his courageous stand against consistency is a great part of his charm.
Yeah, but you can’t really expect him to have read Roe v. Wade before discussing it. Some of that legal language is downright tricky n’ shit.
I know this is stepping on toes, but I feel it’s important to note that I fully support the right for women to feel sexy, day, night, at work, or even on the phone. In no way whatsoever would I hope to abridge or shy from their right to feel sexy — even while wearing that ratty salmon-colored flannel thing my wife wears to bed. Whatever the consequences of this stand, just note that I fully and readily take responsibility.
If you’re in Canada, and you want an abortion, they’ll send somebody (with a French accent, yet!) to give you an abortion within the hour. And its FREE!
But if you need real medical care, you have to wait for years, so you’re better off driving over the border (’cause we all know that all of Canada is close to the US border) to the US to pay thousands of dollars for health care (which is available to everybody (who can pay) and isn’t just limited to citizens (unless they’r here illegally)) so you can get healh care RIGHT AWAY! And you can also pay ten times as much for your medicine but it’s worth it because you know it’s SAFE medicine, vetted by the FDA, not like the Canadian medicine which is bottled and inspected by filthy sodomy-addicted Newfoundlanders.
Thank you, Glenn Beck, for showing me the way.
Liberals. Hmf.
And before you laugh at me about the Newfoundlanders, I saw it!
Okay, Jonah, let’s take this real slow. A pregnancy, like Gaul, is divided into three parts. In the case of a pregnancy, these are called trimesters. Try saying it: trimester.
So, what manner of barnyard animal does this Jonah chap use to slake his carnal lusts? He’s not the goat*ucker, is he?
It pisses me off when people attempt to discuss legal opinions they haven’t read and don’t understand.
Um, we DO remove fetuses from women’s bodies “minutes before full term”. Every day.
It’s called an “elective Caesarian section delivery”.
What’s his point again?
What they can? They do? It’s OK? Crap looks like Chapter 4 has totally be redone- looks like Johna’s book is going to have to be delayed until March…
Okay, Jonah, let’s take this real slow.
Good idea, J-, but I think it’s going to need to be slower than that.
When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much…
[…] Seb at Sadly, No! pretty much says the same thing — except for the bit about trench coats and berets — but I swear I […]
Come now, Legalize, reading and understanding interfere with (but, of course, will not prevent) Jonah and ilk from pulling politically convenient claptrap from their fecund assholes. More broadly, admitting acquaintance with reality and knowledge jeopardizes his position on the wingnut welfare Wurlitzer. Have a heart, man.
What, exactly, is the origin of the ‘Doughy Pantload’ moniker?
reading and understanding interfere with (but, of course, will not prevent) Jonah and ilk from pulling politically convenient claptrap from their fecund assholes.
I think it would prevent it, which is part of why they don’t bother. Another part of why is that they believe reading is all hard and faggy, and as you say threatens their position in the wingnut welfare crowd.
Did the Pantload ever manage to hire an intern? If he did – whoever it is, I’m tempted to feel sorry for the poor bastard except that it’s most likely a Pantload Wannabe. I’m not even sure what a pantload wannabe is – maybe a shart?
I take the position that puppies and kittens are cute, and I don’t care what anybody else says!
It is not because we are certain of their cuteness, but because we’re not, that we can say we are pro-puppy and pro-kitten.
I never really thought about where “Doughy Pantload” might come from.
I read him in the LA Times long before I discovered Sadly, No, and the first time I saw Jonah referred to as “Doughy Pantload,” I thought, That sounds like Jonah.
No backstory needed.
I believe TEH :LEFT aka Norbizness coined the phrase “doughy Pnatload”
Ready to move on, Jonah? Can you say the word without reading it? Comfortable with the idea of dividing a 38- or 40-week period (biology and math are so confusing!) into three parts? Okay, moving on. Let’s try a new word: viability. Viability.
Yes, Norbizness.
I knew this place was full of Canadians. They have no odor. But they do have a certain odour.
I find your patience very shrill, J. Very shrill indeed.
Of course I can say it.
[pause]
Vile hillbilly.
But Jonah, where do you stand on the viability of a Cadbury Cream Egg?!! Do you have the backbone to say that, yes, you believe that Cadbury Cream Egg should be “birthed,” whether the parent is male, female, or a git with tits? And do you support criminalization for doctors who break the Egg and spill its delicious sweet goo? Where do you stand???!!!!!!
“But I am convinced that a baby minutes, days or weeks before full term is, simply, a baby.”
How many, though? How many weeks before birth can it be before he’s willing to admit it’s not a baby? 4? 12? 36? 108? eleventy?
What are you looking at me for?
Let me give you your weekend homework today, Jonah, because it may take a while to complete this exercise. Now that you’ve learned about viability—I suppose saying vile hillbilly will do for now as long as we’re clear on what you’re talking about—you need to determine its relationship with a new, important term: attending physician. Two words: attending, physician. So, here’s your assignment: “Viability and attending physician. What to they have to do with each other and what do they have to do with abortion?” And “I don’t know” doesn’t cut it this time.
I’m becoming convinced that J– has the entire Intert00bz in his pants, and can locate and provide any reference in real time merely by reaching down and…
Um, the details are messy. But thank goodness for the capability.
I met some Canadians once. They seemed very nice, but just to be safe I beat them all to death with a pool cue. Nobody seemed to mind…
mikey
I just never quite got the doughy pantload part. I have raised two little girls through the diaper phase, and never encountered anything doughy.
Then again, maybe that’s because I had human children.
Right-wing activist Grover Norquist once told NRO’s David Freddoso that anyone who can go to black-tie dinners and face the haranguing of rich donors for his pro-life stance has the backbone to support tax cuts, too
To re-phrase — the true test of a politician’s principles and character is his or her willingness to disagree with a small but wealthy minority, since the opinions of the less-rich majority of voters are unimportant.
Not that I’m arguing with this statement, but blah blah sad indictment mumble so-called democracy blah blah blah.
Did you see the column where he was gloating about a minor lack of unity in … Belgium?
To Jonah, the problems in Belgium mean that the EU is going to fall apart soon. And that’s good because … well, I think it has something to do with free health care in much of Eurpope. And the five or six weeks of paid vacation. And it makes him happy to think the EU is going to fall apart soon because that would prove that we do everything better in the US.
Or something.
The Pantload at his Doughiest.
Pathetic. Petty. Paranoid.
I take the position that puppies and kittens are cute, and I don’t care what anybody else says!
That’s just hysterical…
the true test of a politician’s principles and character is his or her willingness to disagree with a small but wealthy minority, since the opinions of the less-rich majority of voters are unimportant. Not that I’m arguing with this statement, but blah blah sad indictment mumble so-called democracy blah blah blah.
Herr Doktor, I agree, but I have a hard time believing it takes much steel to get up in front of a bunch of wealthy donors and argue that abortion is bad or taxes should be cut.
mikey-
My tenure 20 miles south of the border made me appreciate our mellow if somewhat goofy neighbors to the north. I’m not sure you can find people nicer than the average BC resident.
Maybe its all the chronic? Who knows?
Quote the Raven:
More!
Sam:
You missed the most important part!
It’s “When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much *AND* they have adequate health insurance…”
“When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much *AND* they have adequate health insurance…”
Dammit! I always forget that part.
Thanks for the correction. I’ll take what I can get to supplement the red-state public education I endured as a lad.
A pregnancy, like Gaul, is divided into three parts.
Typical liberal, bringing France into it….
To pro-choice voters, it’s surely offensive to watch someone sacrifice the individual liberty of women for political expediency. But, morally, it just doesn’t seem as bad to me.
Well, to be fair, it would seem that way. After all, Jonah’s completely willing to throw women off the rails.
Where was Jonah appearing in Montreal? This is a pretty liberal place and Jonah would look pretty silly on Ste Catherine Street or in the Plateau spewing his crazy conservative talking points. He would definately really, really not fit in up here.
So, what manner of barnyard animal does this Jonah chap use to slake his carnal lusts?
After looking at his photos, I’m thinking Jonah’s “carnal lusts” don’t get more adult than 15 Big Macs and a cartload of party-sized Cheetos bags. Or maybe I’m just hoping that no other sentient beings were harmed in the slaking of Jonah, because, euuch.
As for the Doughy Pantload moniker, Jonah is a Pantload, also Doughy. You could (assuming a strong stomach) make up a whole batch of trading cards: the Doughy Pantload, the Drunken Pantload (Hitchens), the Shrieking Pantload (Pam O.), the Pantless Pantload (McArdle)…
anyone who can go to black-tie dinners and face the haranguing of rich donors for his pro-life stance
What kind of dinners does he go to, anyway?
Cuz at the black-tie dinners I’m familiar with, there’s not a whole lot of haranguing going on.
Did he somehow get his name put on the wrong guest lists, and he just accepts all invitations for the food?
Maybe he showed up in the wrong ballroom once.
I am with t4toby. BC rocks. The province, not the comic strip.
Great Idea, Annie Laurie!
You know where the cards could go?
IN TEH SAMMICH GALLERY!!!1!
We haven’t forgotten, you know.
We’re still here, and there still is no Sammich Gallery
This post is dedicated to Canada, our home and native land.
I wish it was my home and native land . . . .
I still have an open offer for any smart, progressive Canadian dude or dudette who’s looking for an American sweetie.
Jonah won the nickname in a contest a while back, but the original source was apparently here.
To pro-choice voters, it’s surely offensive to watch someone sacrifice the individual liberty of women for political expediency. But, morally, it just doesn’t seem as bad to me.
Ah, yes–the fundamental principle behind all of Goldberg’s arguments: “It just seems like this to me.”
the slaking of Jonah
Good title for a horror movie. Rob Zombie for director.
kthnxbye
Jillian –
Are you near Hollywood, FL? Half of Quebec decamps there for the worst of the winter, it seems. I understand you teach – the last time I checked the NAFTA portions of immigration laws post-secondary teacher could qualify for visas pretty easily with a job offer. This was a few years ago, though, and I expect much has changed.
As for Me, Mum, and Morgantaler, I remember a great concert of theirs at Concordia back in the summer of ’92. Montreal is fun – the only place I have ever lived where they had communist skinheads who went around ambushing and beating the crap out of the fag-bashing and paki-bashing skinheads.
I take the position that puppies and kittens are cute, and I don’t care what anybody else says!
Second.
where they had communist skinheads who went around ambushing and beating the crap out of the fag-bashing and paki-bashing skinheads.
See, this is cool. We oughta have hippie skinheads (but count me out. I like my hair). We oughta have union skinheads. We oughta have SO MANY different skinheads that they all just go critical and start bashing each other with megan’s 2×4 and stomping everybody with their doc martins.
Huh huh. That’d be cool…
mikey
Xenos, in a few years I’ll have enough points to qualify for Canadian immigrant status. I’ve checked into it a bit, and it’s just the money part that is the real hassle at this point, unless I have a job offer or a spouse.
And yeah, I’m not too far from Hollywood. I suppose I’ll have to break my go-go boots out of storage and see if I can wrassle me up a Canadian boyfriend!
Speaking as an English-speaking Canadian (from Nova Scotia) living in the USA I have to say that I get kidded constantly about my accent and the weird way that I pronounce certain words–schedule for instance. Of course this is completely off topic so I will STFU now except to say “Hi Jillian”
Xenos, in a few years I’ll have enough points to qualify for Canadian immigrant status. I’ve checked into it a bit, and it’s just the money part that is the real hassle at this point, unless I have a job offer or a spouse.
despite what the Canadian immigration form say, marrying a Canuck doesn’t help you all that much, so don’t just go marrying to get the little ol’ Blue passport (however, it has to be said, there are lots and lots of other reasons for marrying a Canuck lady, #1 being that most of them are sexy & pissheads).
Except for Cathy Shaidie, obviously, and that stupid bint at some bar in Calgary, who threw me out a poor bar for swearing! Apart from those two, Canadian women are all pretty hot.
and I just realized that it was Jillian who wrote the “I want to move to Canada”, sorry, gender mix up, damn my short attention span…..
Jillian, whom I have it on good authority is Teh Hawt can pretty much get whatever canadian she wants, with or without go-go boots. If I was a canadian, I’d be looking at a South Beach vacation and a whirlwind romance, but hey, that’s just me…
mikey
I can already do it, Rob! “Shedyule”. See? “Oot”. I would gladly eat my breakfast at Tim Horton’s. Je parle un petite peu de Francais aussi (fill in the accents and cedilles yourself; I’m lazy). I think Stephen Harper is a lunatic! I’m totally ready to be Canadian!
lobbey, I wouldn’t necessarily mind a nice Canadian girl, either. I’m good that way.
Personally, I look terrible in go-go boots but …..
Je parle un petite peu de Francais aussi (fill in the accents and cedilles yourself; I’m lazy).
I think if you go to Quebec you get free French classes.
marrying a Canuck doesn’t help you all that much
I disagree, at least as far as immigration goes. Other helpfulness is yours to sort out.
If the State is interested in protecting fetal life after viability, it may go so far as to proscribe abortion during that period, except when it is necessary to preserve the life or health of the mother. [Emphasis added]
You need to read Roe’s companion case, Doe v. Bolton. Health of the mother is defined to include everything from psychological issues to socio-economic harm. Shortly after Roe several states attempted prosecutions of third trimester abortions, but none succeeded because per Roe/Bolton and their definition of “health of the mother,” it is virtually impossible for a licensed physician to perform an illegal abortion until the moment of full delivery.
Shortly after Roe several states attempted prosecutions of third trimester abortions, but none succeeded because per Roe/Bolton and their definition of “health of the mother,” it is virtually impossible for a licensed physician to perform an illegal abortion until the moment of full delivery.
Goes to show you the judiciary gets the key issue here.
We’re not short on people. We’re short on compassion.
Sheesh, the thing that pisses me off is how hard this is for some people to grasp…
mikey
You need to read Roe’s companion case, Doe v. Bolton. Health of the mother is defined to include everything from psychological issues to socio-economic harm. Shortly after Roe several states attempted prosecutions of third trimester abortions, but none succeeded because per Roe/Bolton and their definition of “health of the mother,” it is virtually impossible for a licensed physician to perform an illegal abortion until the moment of full delivery.
Sadly, No. Doe v. Bolton preceded Roe v. Wade and made no reference to trimesters, as did Roe. Furthermore, the Court explicitly rejected the proposition that abortion on demand should be legal through out the full term of the pregnancy, citing “compelling state interest”. From the majority opinion:
“The Court’s decisions recognizing a right of privacy also acknowledge that some state regulation in areas protected by that right is appropriate. As noted above, a state may properly assert important interests in safeguarding health, in maintaining medical standards, and in protecting potential life. At some point in pregnancy, these respective interests become sufficiently compelling to sustain regulation of the factors that govern the abortion decision. The privacy right involved, therefore, cannot be said to be absolute. In fact, it is not clear to us that the claim asserted by some *amici* that one has an unlimited right to do with one’s body as one pleases bears a close relationship to the right of privacy previously articulated in the Court’s decisions. The Court has refused to recognize an unlimited right of this kind in the past.”
Jonah could have saved himself a lot of embarrassment by actually reading the decision.
“To pro-choice voters, it’s surely offensive to watch someone sacrifice the individual liberty of women for political expediency. But, morally, it just doesn’t seem as bad to me.”
Wow, it is hard to believe that someone could so un self-consciously barter away the individual liberty of others. I knew this guy was soulless, but i thought he at least had some shame. Fuck him. Seriously.
Where was Jonah appearing in Montreal?
Montreal University