Shorter Hugh Hewitt

Senator Craig Should Resign

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Above: Hewitt

  • Senator Craig’s behavior is so outrageous, in this time of war, that we are compelled to accept a Republican replacement for him — in contrast to the diaper fetishist David Vitter (R-LA), the appointed replacement for whom would be a Democrat.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.


 

Comments: 16

 
 
 

You can’t hunt for some strange in a time of war now? Since I am single, I have to remain so till the war is over?

Oh wait, I am gay so I should never date anyone ever and am probably banned fom Hugh Hewitt’s shitter anyway.

 
 

Once the war is over, Hugh will volunteer his own bathroom for a Senate homo orgy. A time and a place for everything.

I like that he acknowledges he didn’t demand Vitter’s resignation but doesn’t bother to explain it. Diaper sex for money apparently does not disqualify you as a war leader.

 
 

Since I am single, I have to remain so till the war is over?

Yes, exactly. The War that will Never Be Over….

 
 

It isn’t that breaking the law or behaving immorally disqualifies you from leadership during a time of war- if it did, we wouldn’t be at war in the first place, now would we?

He specifically says that Craig’s lack of judgement disqualifies him. And I mean, really, it’s apples and oranges. Sex with a female hooker? Who hasn’t been tempted? Sex with a man in a toilet? What is he too stupid to know the difference between genitalia? Hewitt has probably been with some pretty ugly broads, but there is a big difference between man-ugly and just plain man.

Now if he had set up a camera in the ladies room, he could get some sympathy.

 
 

Craig may be another self-hating hypocrite but I don’t think he should resign over a misdemeanor. I know men were trolling that bathroom for quick anon action, but the cop couldn’t know whether Craig was prepared to do it without more than playing footsie, and as far as I’m concerned a homosexual come on is not lewd by definition.

 
 

Craig may be another self-hating hypocrite but I don’t think he should resign over a misdemeanor.

I think he should resign over shame. It’s different.

 
 

We keep reading the articles (rants) in the business sections of papers and magazines that there are not enough workers or people out there who will do the low-wage jobs like flipping burgers, digging ditches, or picking up our garbage. The candidate I will vote for in the next election is the first one who vows that their first act in office will be to force all these talking heads and pundits to get real jobs.

Hugh, Hugh! I said no pickles on my hamburger! Are you stupid? … Ooh, right.

 
 

Jebus, if we start demanding that our public officials resign over poor judgment, we’re in for some interesting times. On the plus side, there would be some 500 six-figure jobs opening up in downtown Washington, convenient to the Union Station and Capitol South metro stations!

 
 

Didn’t Larry Flynt put out a call this Spring for information on closeted Republican Reps and Senators?

Sure seems like a lot of them are walking into stings lately…

 
 

Manboobs Hugh is the personification of Rethug values: the right wing movement above everything – – country, family, everything.

 
 

Ew. Man teats.

 
 

Sure seems like a lot of them are walking into stings lately…

I guess it’s possible that someone tipped off the Minneapolis Airport Police about Craig frequenting that particular, ahem, tearoom, but it doesn’t seem very likely. And it seems even less likely that an airport cop in Minneapolis would independently recognize and try to entrap a relatively obscure Senator from Idaho. I mean, whenever I see Mike Crapo in a men’s room I offer him a tug job, but I didn’t think anyone else had that particular hobby.

 
 

As much as it pains me to say, I don’t really think Double H Cup is being hypocritical here. Sure, he would be a hypocrite if he had principals or even a consistent political belief system. But it’s clear from all his words that he doesn’t and, in fact, only cares about one thing, electing Republicans. His position is therefore entirely consistent with his worldview and goals (however, small minded and pathetic they may be.)

 
 

I just wanna know where Hugh is running to…

 
 

I just wanna know where Hugh is running to…

IHOP was having an all-you-can-eat chocolate pancake special….

 
 

lesly said:
the cop couldn’t know whether Craig was prepared to do it without more than playing footsie, and as far as I’m concerned a homosexual come on is not lewd by definition.

Depends on how and where it’s done. Public restrooms are not the place and it is not ok to engage in sex in public. In Craig’s case he stared at another man sitting in a stall. He was repeatedly peeking at him between the cracks. He also initiated physical contact. All of those are “lewd behavior” and that is what he was arrested for.

 
 

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