Above: Mary Katherine Ham

‘LOLcons’ concept created by Jon Swift and named by Marita. (Online LOLcat builder here.)

This just in:

Above: Ann Althouse

[Hanx! Adam C.]


Comments: 81


I don’t think Mary Katherine Ham would refer to them as “Hespanics.” I’m sure they’re always “Meskins” to her.


“U Fluhsed Mah Bible :(”

I was toying with “Invisible Wingnut Bukkake”… but the less said the better.

(for gods sake, don’t google it!)


This is one of those jobs Americans won’t do, right?


Re: Althouse: DO NOT WANT


I can has teh crazy?


LOLcon language is a curious mixture of l33t and Miguel.

Perhaps a LOLcons in party hats crossover someday.


Hanx! Gavin.

TRex, u can hold teh crazy in ur sml arms.

Clem, A.


It’s official. I will never get tired of these LOL posters.


I can has bulemia?

** it works for both!! **


“cooking is hard; let’s go shopping!”


Does this have anything to do with lolicon?


So, the young lady in the first picture is on a bathroom floor with a bunch of books – one of which, at least, is a cookbook – and she appears to have crawled out from under the sink area. Plus, she looks a bit miffed she got caught doing whatever it the fuck it is she’s doing.

Now. Do I wanna know what she’s really doing or should I just give it a miss? ‘Cause whatever it is, it can’t be good.


What a skank,and then man boobs below it.Please I just had lunch.


Ur in my arkives, stealin my ideas

I is innocent!


Hey, we’re teh LOLcons and this next one is off our new record. It’s called “Wingnut Face Mullet”.


I gotta say: MKH is pretty hot (although not so much in that picture). As for AA: no way.


LOLcons are brilliant. Almost as brilliannt as Ann’s homemade onion rings.


Ur in my arkives, stealin my ideas

The correct defense to this, of course, would be “I never did, The Kenosha Kid”.



“I can has ‘nother cheezburger”?


Shalom gentlemen.


The Rabbi has returned to strike down your liberal fallicies with sound conservative logic.


My own suggestions…




How iz we 2 sumbit lolcons?
Here iz wun.


Yes Marco, we cons are brilliant which is why we shall win the presidency and reclaim control of congress in 08.


You libs may criticize this but what do you have to say about the breck girl’s $1200 hair cut.


March forward, brave Saul. Take back teh Country from dem libruls.

Hey, I didn’t make a typo this time!


Take back the country we shall. Tancredo 08.


I guess I’m too old. I think these would be much funnier if they weren’t written in some kind of pidgin baby talk…

Probably just me…



Woot. Tancredo/Malkin 08 you mean.


I have the same reaction to seeing any video of Althouse that I do of George Bush or Joe Lieberman…a strong urge to projectile vomit.

What an ugly, clueless woman she is…


You know Marco that wouldn’t be such a bad idea.


So Mikey my good friend how was that beef stagenoff.


I hope it was kosher?


mikey, it’s the kitty paws, they make for difficulty in typing. And remember, this is a foreign language to them; their native tongue is rougher.


If so can I have some?


Geez, dude, if you’re so fond of Pie, go get a piece…



I second a different brad’s question.

How do I submit this?



That’s awesome and I mean it the way it sounds. Awesome in a 13 year-old girl from 1983 kinda way.


How do you know I’m not a 13 year old girl from 1983, Marco?


At the end of her egg salad video she scolds her audience: You could have given that $200 to [lists a number of charities] but you gave it egg salad for nothin’.

Here’s a suggestion Ann, take the money you’ve received and donate to a charity.


t4toby said,

August 10, 2007 at 23:05

I second a different brad’s question.

How do I submit this?


(eh, what’s the quote code anyway?)

I like it, but I think prefer “I’m in your countree, blame’n your victims”


Dammit, bloody URL code….

[url=]This Work?[/url]

If not, then this:




I think you could do a whole slew of Mark Steyn LOLcons that start with “im in ur countree…”

And I think the code you’re looking for is “blockquote” in these.


One last lolcon.


That last one is great, a different brad!

Retire? Bullsh*t. Incarcerate!


t4toby said,
August 10, 2007 at 23:23

How do you know I’m not a 13 year old girl from 1983, Marco?

You just became more awesome. I mean, a pony!?!? What’s more awesome than that? Maybe Hugh Hewitt’s man boobs, but that’s a size-related awesomeness.


Ham looks like she’s inside the bell jar. Only a matter of time before she goes all Plath on us.


THAT’S MK Hammer?! She looks… Stable.


How do I submit this?

The email info lives here, although I can also grab stuff from the Web (I just lose track of things in comments a lot because I’m usually running from window to window)…


Just bear in mind, the cells for “The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show” were drawn and colored in Mexico.
For that alone they should be granted daul Mexican-American citizenship, and allowed free ingress and egress to this country.


The Rabbi has returned to strike down your liberal fallicies with sound conservative logic

Rebbe dear, please tell us why you deny the Lordship and Saving power of Jesus Christ> Please tell us why little Jewish children are told specifically that the Love of Christ will not save their immortal souls.
How can you be a sound conservative without Jesus. And why are all the other conservatives wrong to acknowledge and submit to the Saving Power of the Holy Ghost?
Please tell us, Rabbi!


The egg salad performance piece was odd. She had already eaten the big sandwich, the one in the roll, but it was unrecorded, so she found a piece of white bread, and ate a second sandwich, still stuffed with too much crap, to disguise the taste. She bit it, pornographically, such sweet disgust, tempered only by her sips of wine. Choking on her sandwich, sacrificing for the viewers, the people who paid to witness the spectacle. An egg salad escort. And yeah, the money, it coulda’ should’ gone to a good cause. Instead, you hit the paypal button for lil’ ol’ egg-eatin’ me. More, Ann, more. Eat the egg salad, eat the egg salad. It disgusts you, you love it. You love it. Eat it. Eat it.


So. No one knows what that girl was doing on the floor of the bathroom with a bunch of books. That’s gonna worry me all night, now.


Hey! I really was a 13 yr old girl in 1983. I saw Duran Duran at MSG and The Police in Atlantic City. Then I saw the Ramones at City Gardens and bought A Different Kind of Tension and never looked back. Next stop: Articles of Faith. Step the fuck back from the chicks who were 13 in 1983. We rule.


So who gets the Bukkit captions? Rush? Denny Hastert? I say Cheney.


I are serious blogger


Next stop: Articles of Faith.

Oh no, if you have a copy of the ‘Wait’ EP, I’m jumping into this wood chipper out of envy.


who gets the Bukkit captions

Bolton’s got the ‘stache to play walrus.


Gavin — Indeed I do. Please don’t woodchip yourself. It lives in my basement with the rest of my vinyl (cool things — like the Feederz sandpaper encased album) and I listen to the two “complete” cds that have come out because I am deeply lame. It’s sad.


No, seriously. I now listen to everything on cd/mp3. I freaked with delight when I recently discovered that someone had ripped the WNUR Middle of America comp to the internetz. It is in my basement — but I would rather download it than bust out the turntable. No excuse!


I’m vinyl-poor these days, but I still have a copy of the Meathouse cassette somewhere.


Matt T.,

I’m guessing that Ham, in a show of solidarity w/ Pace University Koran flusher Stanislav Shmulevich, was preparing to swirl more books. Looks like she has a Hindu idol (upper right) destined for the thundermug, too.

“Mola Ham, you betrayed Shiva. Prepare to meet Kali…in HELL!”

(Burns, falls from cliff, strikes head, hits water, devoured by crocodiles.)


Gavin: Ha! See? I couldn’t play a cassette now if I wanted to — but I did download a bunch of JFA recently (all of which lives in my basement); they rule. I’m getting very nostalgic in my old age.


Ahh, so it’s Wingnut Vaugely Offensive Yet Completely, In The Grand (Or Even Minor) Scheme Of Things, Meaningless Gesture, #8, An old favorite.



Although MKHam, solo, is probably a BUKKIT lolcon. (I HAS NO BUKKIT… & I MUST POUT)

T4tobey, my immediate reaction to Mark (“Rhymes with whine, not with stain”) Steyn is usually IM IN YR COUNTRY, M-BARRSNG MY NATIVE LAND. Also, while he has the decency (or vanity) to avoid the Wingnut Facial Mullett, I would like to know why he uses the same cheap glue-on flocking as the GI Joe doll action figure ca. 1967. Because it’s not a good look, and even very young children are unlikely to confuse Steyn with a real soldier.


So explain to me my liberal friends why Bill Clinton didn’t take bin laden from the Saudis.


This thread makes me want to eat some Ham…


Because Clinton cared more about covering up his affairs than defending American national security.


Thats why? Admit it libs democrats don’t care about America all they care about is raising taxes and partisan witch hunts!


Saul, that’s absurd. Democrats mostly care about making suicide vests…


So because one democratic president screwed and intern or two that means that all democrats care about raising taxes??? I don’t think so!


The dems in congress care nothing about the war on terror thats why keep undermining our President by voting to withdraw troops and creating scandals out of nothing ie federal attorney firings!


Sir! mikey here. Reporting, sir.

Thank you, mikey. At ease.

Thank you, sir.

mikey, I’ve got a problem.

I’m sorry to hear that, sir.

I’d like your help with it.

Anything I can do, sir.

mikey, we’ve got an infestation.

Sir, I’ve got half a script of Kwell in my footlocker!

Thank you, mikey. Not that kind of infestation. We’ve got trolls.


That’s right. Trolls. And not the more benign kind.

There’s a benign kind?

Well, there are amusing trolls. Literate trolls. Even well read trolls.

I’ve seen ’em, sure.

These are ‘special’ trolls. They have – er – limitations.


Yep. They’re just not real bright.

So they’re…

I’m afraid so. They’re…



Hi, I’m from the Netvocates. I’m here to help.


saul is driving me to borededcide. saul can get a load of this dangerous tempstress!


OK, the Althouse one was nearly funny. What’s more funny than some lady eating your food?

LOLcons! I guess.


Really like republican potty.

Saul, the answers to your questions are here.


How does the DSMV IV describe this form of bulemia where the subject reads cook books and then pukes?



It’s true, I love to sex me up some puppies and kittens…then I eats’em.


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