Free To Be … YouTube And Me

Kathleen Parker’s on-again, off-again love affair with YouTube hit the skids last week:

One of the questions posed during the CNN-sponsored “debate” came from a talking snowman who cited global warming as the most important issue for snowmen.

Ha-ha! Can you imagine!?! Snowmen aren’t even real!

(Never mind that global warming is a topic of interest to many voters, in particular voters in a Democratic primary, and that a snowman is a too-obvious-to-be-clever-but-nonetheless-compelling visual, comparable to 98 percent of political cartoons ever published.)

Some questions were serious, including one about health care for illegal immigrants and another about Iraq — but too many of the 39 were beyond silly.

Questions Kathleen Parker is interested in = serious. Questions about topics in which she is not particularly interested = silly. This seems an unnecessarily subjective metric for such stark differences.

Even if the candidates were irritated by this faux show of democratic connectivity, they had no choice but to participate. If you refuse to play with the YouTubies, you risk being viewed as elitist and out of touch with Tha Peepul.

YouTubies? Are these the people who produce YouTube content or the people who view it? How often must a person view YouTube content to become a YouTubie — or is the appellation based on something else entirely? For example, I visit YouTube pretty infrequently, yet I vote Democratic, occasionally cultivate facial hair, rarely tuck in my shirt, and do not feel intimidated when someone mentions an unfamiliar musician. As such, I’m guessing that I’m a YouTubie.

Also: “Tha Peepul”? Is this meant to imply these YouTubies are illiterate? Hooked on phonics? Ardent fans of hip-hop music?

[T]he only conclusion to draw from this exercise is that Republicans, scheduled for a similar trivializing gantlet in September, should decline. Let’s give the Democratic candidates applause for gamesmanship, but concede that playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.

YouTube : Democrats :: FoxNews : Republicans

If it is necessary to submit to anything demanded by anyone, then no one worthy will run for public office. To wit: At a recent off-the-record dinner party, a congressman was asked who he thought would make a good president. His response was telling: “Do you mean among those running or those qualified people who won’t run because they’re unwilling to submit to the humiliation of our political process?”

To which, also, Kathleen Parker ascribes her suffering of an acute mortification from having published such widely syndicated columns as John Edwards’ Death by Bangs and Pornifying Politics.

Alas, sadly no. Her actual follow-up sentence begins:

Commenting on that process recently, Newt Gingrich doubtless spoke for many…

As always, actual quotes from actual columnists.

 

Comments: 48

 
 
 

playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.

George Bush, scratching his head as he lies his ass off in the most clownish way possible: “Want some wood?”

 
 

Paker first it: it’s ‘teh’ not ‘tha’.

and how many questions were beyond silly, 10?, 15? 30? the pharse “Too many’ is pretty subjective and depends on what is being talkeda bout – For example how many Viking Beserkers trying to kill you with an axe are too many? One I should think. Yes? Yes.

 
 

Some of the very serious wingnut bloggers have suggested that they and the rest of the very serious gaggle of very serious wingnut bloggers, seriously compose very serious questions of the GOP candidates to make sure that silly snowmen talking about silly topics like Global Warming, don’t get thrust upon the very serious GOP candidates.

I seriously love this idea. Can you imagine the questions plucked from the comment sections of LGF, Malkin, Riehl, et al? I think that THIS is what the candidates worry about most – the very public exposure of who their base really is: a healthy mix of the paranoid, fanatical, violent, insane, and st00pid.

“Governor Romney, do you think we should nuke ONLY Iran or BOTH Iran and Mecca?”

“Mayor Giuliani, do you think that ALL liberals should be sent to Gitmo or should we save the able-bodied ones for slave labor?”

“Senator Brownback, do you think that all non white male Christians should be deprived of the franchise, or should we let married white women with at least 4 male children vote as well?”

God damn, I would watch every second of THAT debate.

 
 

Also: “Tha Peepul”? Is this meant to imply these YouTubies are illiterate? Hooked on phonics? Ardent fans of hip-hop music?

They wake up frequently during the night to urinate.

 
Spalpeen Hammer
 

Aren’t YouTubies all homosexualists? Or am I thinking of TeleTubies?

 
 

Yes, clearly, the best way forward for Republicans is to continue to shun, fear and misunderstand teh Intertubes! The entire primary process and general election campaign should be conducted through AM radio and direct mail!

 
 

inviting so-called “ordinary Americans” to film themselves posing questions to presidential candidates does not advance democracy, no matter how much hoopla we manufacture.

Gasp! Not the ordinary people! Who is digging the ditches while the proles engage in such nonsense?

Kathleen Parker, meet Peggy Noonan. But I’m sure you elitist bitches already know each other.

 
 

Al Gore’s earth tones, Hillary’s cleavage, Edwards’s haircut, Omaba’s middle name; where did all this shit come from? The YouTubies? S/N!

At least she used “gantlet” correctly.

 
 

…but concede that playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.

Somewhere, in an old garage, Fred Thompson’s (rented) red pickup truck is shedding a tear.

 
 

playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.

Seein’ as how I’m one of those “masses”, I feel kind of offended. And they accuse US of being elitist?

 
 

“Rudy Guliani, with just how much gusto would you seduce me, don a Reagan mask, flip me over a horse and prolapse my rectum/bust my pubic bone with your incredible, entrepreneurial procreation pole?”

“Ron Paul, just how un-PC and maverick are your opininons on this and that?”

“Dear Mr. Huckabee… Why do you *rawk* so damn much?”

 
 

“Mr Tancredo, do you think only gay male homosexualists should be killed by stoning, or should we include the gay woman female homsexualist lesbos?”

 
 

…but concede that playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.

No, no. but playing buffoon to corporate overlords is.
Man, I hope the republics back out of the debate. and I hope CNN holds it anyway and leaves the empty podiums up.

Show the country just how much you love her, guys. ‘Atta boy.

 
 

playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.

No, but it should be.

On my darker days I just wish they would all give up the pretense of “debate” and go into full-on Chinese Superman mode. We wouldn’t lose much substance-wise and, at the very least, drinking a beer while standing on your head, or palming a dozen goose eggs with your bare hand demonstrates some level of focus and dedication.

 
 

“Mr. Romney, Mormons believe in polygamy. (Oh, come on, yes they do.) Muslims believe in polygamy. What assurance can you give the American people that you aren’t working for al Qaeda?”

 
 

This question is for all the candidates.

Who would win in a fight; Ron Paul or Mike Gravel?

 
 

“Tha Peepul”? ” Ewwww. That makes my cringer cringe.

and

“playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency”? Oh really? Is it not? And this would be as opposed to, say, playing buffoon to barking heds like Tweety Matthews and Vulfie Blitzer, or to those who attend $1,000-a-plate fundraisers?

Sounds like she’s trying to fashion herself as Peggy Noonan Lite, for some inexpicable reason.

 
 

BUMFIGHT!!!!

mikey

 
 

I believe the expression is ‘YouTubers’, particularly if you’re a carrot or potato.

 
Herr Doktor Bimler
 

playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.
OK, but some sort of musical talent should be a criterion. How about playing saxophone to the masses?

Incidentally, how do you manufacture hoopla? Some investors were planning to build a hoopla factory in my city, but they couldn’t get the land re-zoned, so I never did find out. I think it was eventually built in China, on account of lower environmental standards.

 
 

shorter kathleen parker:

allowing our politicians to interact with people who have not signed loyalty oaths threatens to cheapen our democracy.

 
 

Actually, Dok, it’s not that hoopla manufacturing itself is the problem. Here in the US they’ve banned most of the precursor chemicals, so most of the hoopla is manufactured in small mom-and-pop hoopla labs in rural california north of sacramento. You gotta set up in an old single-wide well off the main roads, ’cause the smell of the cooking hoopla is harsh….

mikey

 
 

Dear Sadly No,

You just might consider posting this on your website. It is a acknowledgement that Iraq is doing extremely well. This comes from The Democrat New York Times writers. Unbelievable!

Love In Him,
Marie Jon’
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/30/opinion/30pollack.html?_r=2&oref=slogin&oref=slogin

 
Herr Doktor Bimler
 

To tell the truth, I was shocked to find out that hoopla is a synthetic. Shocked and disillusioned. I used to think it was some kind of herbal high, the way people talk about the stuff… Organic, natural, so it must be harmless.
OK, after a few quick hits of hoopla, I am suddenly inspired to crank up the stereo, put on Karajan conducting Bach’s Mass in B Minor, and point the speakers out the window. If the neighbours complain, I will explain that I am playing Mass to the buffoons.

This is my brain on hoopla ? °.

 
 

Please send Retardo a big hello for me.WINK!

A Kiss baby,
Rie

 
 

Actually, Dok, it’s not that hoopla manufacturing itself is the problem. Here in the US they’ve banned most of the precursor chemicals, so most of the hoopla is manufactured in small mom-and-pop hoopla labs in rural california north of sacramento. You gotta set up in an old single-wide well off the main roads, ’cause the smell of the cooking hoopla is harsh….

Not only is the smell bad, but pretty soon your knee-deep in the hoopla.

 
 

…you’re…

 
 

This comes from The Democrat New York Times writers. Unbelievable!

You do know what “op-ed” signifies, don’t you? These gentlemen are not NYT writers, they work for the Brookings Institution.

 
 

ack! marie Jon’ in the flesh! (so to speak) and just when Brad left for vacation!!

 
 

Love In Him

Whoever that Him is I bet I’d kick his ass in a drag race.

 
 

Sinking in your fight
Too many runaways
Heating up the night

Hmm, runaways.

Sounds like a Hooligan’s Holiday….

mikey

 
 

Love In Him

That’s fucking creepy. I think we’re supposed to skin Him, make a comforter out of His skin, I guess sew it with thread made from his sinew, then make love under that comforter? Ewwww….

mikey

 
 

I think the purple YouTubbie is teh gay.

 
 

Oh, hi Marie! We missed you.

 
 

[…] afraid I have to agree with the Weirdos and Hippies over at Sadly No on this issue.  And that’s not easy.  Well done, […]

 
 

This bit really bothers me:

inviting so-called “ordinary Americans” to film themselves posing questions to presidential candidates does not advance democracy, no matter how much hoopla we manufacture.

“So-called,” Kathleen? Are you an “ordinary American,” Miss MSM? Rush Limbaugh is being a dolt on this issue as well. Michelle Malkin is not. B4B is not. Sadly, No! is not.

Let the debate go forward. If a question is out of line, say so and answer some other question. It’s not that hard, RINOs.

 
objectivelypro-
 

Ewwww. That makes my cringer cringe

Just this morning, I had to shut my cringer off and hose down the filter panels.

That’s some sludgy mess, I tell ya.

 
 

Oh, and Patrick Ruffini is right. Save the Debate.

 
 

We sincerely hope you will reconsider any decision to snub the critical January 29th primary state of Florida and 51 million unique YouTube users. The Republican Party is about freedom. A free and open debate that includes the American people could be just what the doctor ordered to break the stanglehold of the liberal media.

That’s pretty funny, Psycheout. Isn’t stanglehold a Ted Nugent number?

 
Qetesh the Abyssinian
 

playing buffoon to the masses is not a requirement for the presidency.

How about playing bassoon to the masses?

Oh. Herr Dok. You beat me to it.

Hey, dig out the Handel and play masses to the buffoons.

Oh, bloody hell, Dok. D’you get fresher air in NZ? Am I just getting all your breathed-out air and thought-out funnies?

 
 

Isn’t Parker the same dipshit who wrote a death threat against John Kerry and Wesley Clark (which she attributed to a Delta Force officer who doesn’t exist)?

On another note, if this the picture that launched a thousand falafels?

http://thumbsnap.com/v/KBhm7Zcd.jpg

 
Herr Doktor Bimler
 

Am I just getting all your breathed-out air and thought-out funnies?

Honestly, Qetesh, I honestly meant to leave the second joke (masses to the buffoons) for someone else, but I got greedy.
Blame it on the Hoopla. I’m going to cut down on that stuff; it’s worse than Substance D. Might switch to Brouhaha — people say it has fewer side-effects.

 
 

M-Jo citing Ken ‘One More Try’ Pollack is Teh Funny. I don’t know what the under/over is on Teh Rapture!!1!ZOMG! arriving before Iraq is unfucked-up, but that’s a hard one to call.

 
 

worse than Substance D.

Great. Thanks doc. Now I gotta remember Benicio del Toro scratching madly at all the buggies scrambling over his skin … that, and the Marie Jon presence here have sent me scrambling for the Atropine and calamine lotion.

Note to self: never watch Scanner Darkly whilst under the influence again. It’s just wasteful, really. Superfluous.

Is this why I no longer see the preview?

 
 

Pornographers have leapt on the youtube bandwagon with the launch of youporn and porntube. Not very nice.

 
Hysterical Woman
 

What does that have to do with the post, Cruella? And do you always have to link to your blog?

 
 

Oh dear. Pornographers, huh? Ok. Where do they fall on the hate’m schedule? Muslims, Fags, Pornographers? Something like that? I mean, sure, it’s consenting adults providing a perfectly legal product for consumption by yep, you guessed it, more consenting adults. Man, we gotta expend some time and treasure to stomp on that, ’cause it pisses jesus off.

Who’s with me??

mikey

 
 

I think I’ll go over to youporn.com and watch some samples, purely for research on that disgusting vice of pornography, of course.

 
 

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