Poultry In Motion
In the wake of the Watergate era, the media critic Erik Barnouw noted the habit of Washington reporters to write in code, couching important stories in such a way as to make them appear rote and ordinary to the average reader, while suggesting depths of intrigue to the cognoscenti. This is what Barnouw was talking about:
McCain, Cornyn Engage in Heated Exchange
At a bipartisan gathering in an ornate meeting room just off the Senate floor, McCain complained that Cornyn was raising petty objections to a compromise plan being worked out between Senate Republicans and Democrats and the White House. He used a curse word associated with chickens and accused Cornyn of raising the issue just to torpedo a deal.
As this was a press conference, a video recording exists. It shows McCain in a rooster suit affecting an exaggerated Tennessee drawl.
McCain: “Cornyn, you pecker. You raised — I say — you raised the issue just to torpedo a deal. Well, you can pullet. Go get laid, you sulky cock, before you get egg on your face.” [McCain turns to the camera] “That boy thinks he’s a smart feller, but it’s just the other way around.”
Things got really heated when Cornyn accused McCain of being too busy campaigning for president to take part in the negotiations, which have gone on for months behind closed doors. “Wait a second here,” Cornyn said to McCain. “I’ve been sitting in here for all of these negotiations and you just parachute in here on the last day. You’re out of line.”
McCain, a former Navy pilot, then used language more accustomed to sailors (not to mention the current vice president, who made news a few years back after a verbal encounter with Sen. Patrick Leahy of Vermont).
McCain: [singing] “The first mate’s name was Cornyn, by Christ, he was a gorgon; ten times a day he’d stop and play, a-with his friggin’ organ.” [Toot-toot!] “Ag-ag-ag-ag-ag! By the way, Cornyn, cluck you!”
Cornyn’s office declined to comment on the incident. McCain’s camp specifically denied that the senator ever claimed to know more about the immigration issue than other senators, but acknowledged that the two Republicans had quite a disagreement.
You’d almost think that official Washington was unaware of McCain’s chicken-suit, Quick Draw McGraw, and Popeye theatrics, and gnomic appearances as Johnny Cloud, Navajo Fighter Ace. Why oh why can’t we have a better press corps?
Waitaminute!! We’ve got a PRESS CORPS????
mikey
Did Cornyn leave the meeting madder than a wet hen, without uttering a peep?
It’s spelled wrong, Mikey.
It’s press CORPSE!
Does that clear things up?
Nah, he’s pretty hard-boiled.
I can almost hear that hornpipe. 🙂
What did Orrin Hatch have to say about all this?
Poultry in Motion?
Hahaha I’m lovin’ it.
P.S. We have the finest press corpse in the world, and don’t you forget it.
P.P.S. Cornyn isn’t a chicken hawk, but he does possess a forbidden lust for box turtles.
P.P.P.S. Upon further review, while Senator John Cornyn does possess a forbidden lust for box turtles, he is also a chicken hawk.
He was madder than a wet hen.
He was madder than a wet hen.
Well, Hatch does like to be the one who rules the roost…
He’s no . He ought not to put in one basket.
Is this another Sadly, No! plea for bucks?
He’s no spring chicken.
That’s true, but he’s younger than Robert Byrd. Byrd should have taken him under his wing when he had the chance.
Is this another Sadly, No! plea for bucks?
Well, honestly, these guys make chicken feed from this blog…
Yeah, we can always use a bit of scratch.
I thought you all just did it for the chicks.
Sweetie, this croquettery will get you nowhere.
Sweetie, this croquettery will get you nowhere.
Oh, don’t mind me, I’m just feeling a little cooped up tonight.
You mean as in hormone free?
The press corps really laid an egg on this one. They’re all such chickenshits…
You mean as in hormone free?
Careful there, honey, or you’ll end up getting hen pecked. No one wants that.
That was fowl.
They’re all such chickenshits…
They aren’t so bad. They just need to get all of their ducks in a row is all.
I dunno, I think they’re a bunch of loons.
I dunno, I think they’re a bunch of loons.
Now you’re just being a turkey.
Oh, stop grousing.
More of a gaggle, I’d say…
Oh, stop grousing.
You’re right. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get my hackles raised.
Say, has anyone heard anything about Dan Quayle lately?
The press tends to be vultures if you ask me.
If they ever want to catch a Tory he’s the man to chase…
If they ever want to catch a Tory he’s the man to chase…
Well, as much as I enjoyed that little nugget, I should get to sleep. I have to be up with the roosters.
McCain just needs to take Cornyn under his wing, instead of brooding on their differences and worrying about feathering his own nest. But no, he’s always running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Bird brain… A chicken pox on both their houses!
Okay, I’ve overdosed now. Time for bed.
Auk!
Well, perhaps this explains some of his overreaction.
Hey, come up with your own act.
Geez, McCain sure is making a ham of himself, huh?
What? Why is everyone looking at me like that?
that wouldn’t be green eggs and ham, would it?
I’d be more comfortable floundering around with fish metaphors, myself.
Is it too late to suggest awarding a Pullet Surprise to Gavin M.?
Unfortunately, yes.
It’s too bad Linc Chaffee wasn’t there for the dispute. He had a unique perspective on Senatorial politics. He might have represented a blue state, but he was a Rhode Island red.
Does the saying “The chickens have come home to roost” apply here?
Johnny Cloud, Navajo Fighter Ace?
Damn, there’s a reference!
I was going to make a cock joke, but I chickened out…
i don’t want to ruffle any feathers but this thread is for the birds.
You mean McCain used FOWL language?!!!
I think I’ll go paint Rhode Island Red, then go home and pullet.
My favorite member of Black Uhuru was Duckie Simpson.
But Puma Jones was definitely a hot chick.
They think they’re a couple of pheasant pluckers, but it’s just the other… ah, never mind.
Now you know why I crossed the road.
Never going Bawk!
FYI: Pammy’s getting genocidal again. She’s up in arms over the “fact” that “Condhimmi” isn’t letting Israel push the Gazans into the sea (as one of her lovely commentators suggested the other day). She one-ups her call for “DEATH TO GERMANY!” by shrilly imploring us to “CARPET BOMB GAZA ALREADY!”
honestly, my first thought was, “wow, McCain called him a cocksucker?”
Only those eagle-eyed visionaries can sort the wheat from the chaff, whilest the rest of the punslingers just flounder around, eventually clamming up.
[…] sadly, no! McCain: “Cornyn, you pecker. You raised — I say — you raised the issue just to torpedo a […]
Actually I’m having trouble getting past this line from the journalist:
McCain, a former Navy pilot, then used language more accustomed to sailors.
OK, I see what he meant — the language has had more experience with sailors than with pilots.
But does he mean it in a good way or what? He could be implying that the words in question have a long career of lingering on the wharf when the fleet comes in, or that they have been seen in dingy waterside dives, hanging out with swarthy lascar seafaring types. Alternatively, the language might be honest blue-collar words, who shipped out in the days of the merchant marine, and knew Malcolm Lowry.
Inquiring but easily-confused minds would like to know.
Mehitabel the Abyssinian would like to add that she is more accustomed to dry food.
Feck. Shouldn’t comment while smoking dried leeches.
Actually I’m having trouble getting past this line from the journalist:
McCain, a former Navy pilot, then used language more accustomed to sailors.
OK, I see what he meant — the language has had more experience with sailors than with pilots.
But does he mean it in a good way or what? He could be implying that the words in question have a long career of lingering on the wharf when the fleet comes in, or that they have been seen in dingy waterside dives, hanging out with swarthy lascar seafaring types. Alternatively, the language might be honest blue-collar words, who shipped out in the days of the merchant marine, and knew Malcolm Lowry.
Inquiring but easily-confused minds would like to know.
Mehitabel the Abyssinian would like to add that she is more accustomed to dry food.