Homage To Evelyn Quince
Hmm.
The Party and the Candidates
NR readers have often taken me to task for my squishiness on abortion
[Lifts eyebrow] How ribald!
I am firmly pro-life — after the first ten weeks.
[Shifts in seat; long exhale] MMmm, you naughty boy.
O.K., that’s kind of lame. But it’s still better than the replies Rudy Giuliani offered, both at the debate and during a brutal battering by Laura Ingraham yesterday.
Good God. Now you’ve just ruined it for me. That’s unbelievably filthy even before I think that Rudy might have been in drag at the time, Ingraham was wearing her famous leopard-print skirt, and they probably networked their pagan tryst through Ingraham’s old match.com profile. I mean, ugh.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch Cumguzzling Monster Twats IV, whose producers are far more subtle with their eroticism.
I am firmly pro-life — after the first ten weeks.
That’s basically the “pro-life” position anyway.
Firmly pro-life–until the fortieth week (or the delivery, whichever comes first). That’s been the position I’ve noticed among the pro-lifers.
That was a good post by Frum, though. Fortunately, no one will listen to him.
Howdy, my hippie friends! I’ve created a new banner for you at Sadly sad. Or whatever. Check it out! Gavin, you are welcome to use it copyright and royalty free. It’s because I care about you. Not like that, weirdo.
Consider this a ‘hit and run’ type trolling, since I have to work this week, and can’t devote my full time to making fun of the hippie types that visit your site. But seriously, hippies, you guys crack me up!
See you in 3+ months, hippie dudes and dudettes.
ok — i clicked on your “famous leopard-skin print” link, clicked on the “images” link in google, and it came back with a picture of mr. t with a duck’s bill for a nose.
wtf?
Gah. The reference is to the skirt Ingraham wore in a photo introduction to ‘young conservatives’ on the cover of the New York Times Magazine. Ingraham, David Brock, Dinesh D’Souza, others I can’t remember. I guess a pic is not online but I’ve referenced it at my old dump once and get a steady stream of google hits for it, so there’s definitely a demand if someone wants fire up their scanner.
Not only are the producers of Cumguzzling Monster Twats IV more subtle in their eroticism, they probably have more respect for women.
Rudy’s one of countless Repub pigfuckers who should thank the unholy Gingrich for moving the mistreatment goalposts so far. (And the Clenis for providing an always applicable distraction.) On the other hand, I half wonder what his second wife and their kids will do if he does get the nomination. They’ll probably have many millions quietly funneled their way for silence, but damn could they sink him.
By random chance I know one anecdote about Rudy’s relationship with his daughter. A family friend sublet his place in the city while he was mayor. In this apartment Rudy had turned a bedroom into his office, and put his daughter in a windowless tiny room that was barely more than a pantry. The truly horrible part is that there was a lock on the outside of the door of the room. As in Rudy could lock his daughter in a windowless room at night. I can’t pretend to know if the lock was used, but the family friend made clear it wasn’t some relic of a previous incarnation of the room that just hadn’t been removed.
Rudy scares me. I honestly think he’s insane in a verifiable, clinical sense.
What a coincidence. I am firmly pro life too. I believe that a woman has a right to live her life on her terms, and only bring children into it when she is ready to do so and wants them. How could pro life mean anything else?
Poverty, wrecked lives and an endless cycle of children having children. If they had to accept that in their lives, things would be different overnight.
One wonders what reproductive rights would look like if white men were the only ones who could get pregnant…
mikey
html menken —
i’d like to see the ingram picture… however, a duck-billed mr. t is what i picture ingram looks like out of her studio makeup anyway…
Following up on my anecdote, according to wikipedia, since Rudy’s website curiously omits mention of his children, his daughter is a senior in high school, let’s say 18 years old, small chance of 17. He became mayor in 94. Meaning she was, at most, 5. He was potentially locking in a toddler.
Like I said, scary man.
I agree with whatever gordons owner said! Admittedly, it makes no sense, but I’m a liberal for the day! We all know that liberals aren’t required to make sense, right? Save that for the clear thinkers i.e. conservatives.
Yes, because major fetal developments start on the 71st day. Before that it’s just a few nondescript cell clusters.
Brad, who’s different in ways unexpressed, said:
Holy cow! I’m shaking in my boots now! That friggin’ mayor had kids!!!!!!!!
Thanks for opening my eyes, and I hope you being ‘different’ doesn’t cause you much trouble, brad.
Kevin, quit tryin so hard.
Either it comes or it doesn’t, n it hasn’t.
One wonders what reproductive rights would look like if white men were the only ones who could get pregnant…
Thirty-plus years ago, Flo Kennedy said “If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.”
It was quite a popular slogan among us Second-Wave Feminists, but then Roe v. Wade made it obsolete. Temporarily. Because when it comes to the rights of women, it seems like there will be some successes, and then everybody forgets why that particular issue was so important, and meanwhile the Talibangelicals are working in their eternal darkness to return us all to the status quo ante, since the one thing Talibangelicals of every stripe, plaid, and pattern agree upon is that Daddy-God Hates Guurls.
a different brad, don’t even bother. Kevin makes shoelimpy look like George Will.
brad, buddy! (but not in that way my friend),k when you say,
“Kevin, quit tryin so hard.
Either it comes or it doesn’t, n it hasn’t.”
I’m forced to say, ‘huh?’ You can either like or dislike my (might I say ‘brilliant’, or maybe ‘masterpiece’) banner for the sad people, but if you aren’t even willing to use English, well, them’s fighting words.
“a different brad, don’t even bother. Kevin makes shoelimpy look like George Will.”
Indeed! BTW, who’s shoe limpy?
Aside: I’ve heard that Mydol does WONDERS for calming hysterics, woman of hysterical nature.
Just sayin’.
So, Rudy likes it rough, huh?
Why am I not surprised?
And, yeah, he is one scary mega-authoritarian shit head.
I’m expecting him to have a short shelf life, however. Like MadJack McCain, he’s gonna peak about 16 months too early.
No doubt Kevin’s generally better mannered than limpy, at the very least. I just mean he hasn’t found his muse yet.
Which is to say, Kev, that my response to your attempted routine is why bother?
It’s neither prickly enough to provoke any anger, and don’t doubt I do give you credit for not trying that tact, nor biting enough to deserve real notice.
Hysterical Woman just pwned Kevin.
And he doesn’t even know why. He probably never (george) will.
Just a heads up… If you stop whining about trolls, they probably will not appear to correct your ridiculous ideals, such as ‘a 20 ppm increase in CO2 will destroy the world! For God’s sake, that’s almost .01% of the atmosphere! We’re doomed!’
So quit whining about those of us who are smarter than you. Otherwise, you might have to face the fact that you aren’t all that smart. And I wouldn’t even wish that on my hippie liberal foes.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch Cumguzzling Monster Twats IV, whose producers are far more subtle with their eroticism.
Link please.
The fallacy here is that Rudi’s ever-shifting position on abortion will hurt him with the Fundie Wingnuts. It won’t. He’ll have a nice little meeting with Dobson and the gang and pinky-swear to appoint a bunch of Roy Moore clones to the federal bench and all will be forgiven.
But I’ll do it, my hippie liberal friends! For the good of the world. Enough with this hippie crap! Hippies are idiots, plain and simple.
Aside: I’ve got people chopping down about a third of the trees on my farm. Some might say it’s to make the rest of the trees grow faster. But it’s really ujust to piss the hippies off.
Hippies totally suck.
Kevin said, I’ve heard that Mydol does WONDERS for calming hysterics, woman of hysterical nature.
Lesley encourages Kevin to post that comment here and here.
Just as long as you don’t mow the lawn again, kevin. Cause that would be a crime against hughmanatee.
*sigh*
God made him simple.
Kiss my broken tree, hippies. Allow us to make a living, huh? Or don’t. we’ll murder the trees anyway, friggin hippies! I am easily killing over a thousand trees today. Maybe 40,000 this month. All to give the finger to hippie environmentalists. Oh yeah, cash is involved. Sadly, I immediately replant, which gives hippies cause for celebration :(.
Seriously though, I LOVE making fun of you guys. You guys actually think you understand the ecosystem of ‘the whole world’, don’t you? Admit it, you think that if one thing dies, the enire ecosystem is in trouble! sheesh.
Get out of the city, ppl! It’s high time that you shake off the gavining you’ve been fed and that you learn a bit about reality. There’s both good and bad out there, but why learn about it from the iron cold anvil that is gavin? His boyfriend jilted him, but why let that effect you? Experience the peace, love, and grace that is available to you, or anyone. Gavin will see it soon too, once he gets over his jilting. But why wait for him? As Shakespeare might say, “Out out, damned people!”
Plz plz plz learn what peace is before you attempt to proclaim it. I’ll be completely with you when you do.
Dead guy painter, you speak of only yourself :(.
I shall do it for you, Lesley! ‘Cause I care. Alot.
Smiling Mortician, your link didn’t work.
Try mine.
I must protest at the downward direction of this thread. Kevin promised some hit-and-run trollage — we have had the hit, where is the running?
How can I engage in perverse fantasies involving Laura Ingraham and brutal battering, when the thread is awash with Kevins? Hmm… leopard-print skirts… she can whiten my sepulchre any day…
Smilin’ Mort: God made him simple.
Either god or all the gas huffing.
Aside: I’ve got people chopping down about a third of the trees on my farm. Some might say it’s to make the rest of the trees grow faster. But it’s really just to piss the hippies off.
See, when people tell me the Industrial Age put an end to the quaint country traditions of seasonal scapegoats and faux-human-sacrifice (like corn dollies, Cock Robin, John Barleycorn, Beltane fires, etc.), Kevin comes along and proves them wrong. He’s out there cutting down trees in honor of his personal embodiment of a mythical evil or misfortune.
Best be careful, Kevin: You’re supposed to appease the nature spirits through the growing season, and then ritually kill them at harvest time. (Unless you have a summer harvest crop, in which case, chop away! And don’t forget to toss some in the Bale Fire!)
Remember, don’t say “hippies” three times, or you’ll summon them.
Sometimes, hippies steal conservative folk’s children and replace them with changelings. This is how upstanding, righteous Christians end up with gay kids.
And hippies can take on the form of a beautiful woman and seduce Republican men in their dreams to suck out their
moneylife force and steal theirmoneysemen. That’s why so many GOP leaders keep getting caught with their pants down.And then, one time, Randy Beamen’s big brother saw a hippie with a hook on it’s hand, dragging a dead dog that had been dried in a microwave oven…
I Believe in Hippies: Because the Fey Folk are sooooooo last century!
(Gak! its hand! I was so frigging worried about the damn strike tags I totally missed the typo.)
Kaye G ruined leopard print anything for me….
Les, I did it. Check ’em out! I even confronted the ridiculous sexism of the gay chick link you sent. Again, it’s ’cause I care.
Any chance you can goad your handler into some kind of ‘photoshop off’? I understand that gavin isn’t very good at photoshop, but neither am I ! It will make for some great hilarity, and gavin and his bf probably won’t have to admit how much they suck at pshop. ‘Cause I suck at pshop!!!!
Don’t be gay, Gavin. Accept my challenge! You’ve got 2 hrs and 17 minutes to prove you aren’t gay. After that, I give up.
PC tells me to say that gay is great or something. Screw that. Being gay is for fags.
Jeez, kevin said he was leaving, not to return for 3+ months, TEN posts ago. Now, I know that as a Conservatard he floats randomly around the space/time continuum, rarely flying over and never touching down in Reality Land, but this is absurd…
Time to go to bed. Not up for the empty nothingness that is kevin tonight.
Dot:
Sigh. Humans are so foolish. And I had such high hopes at the beginning of this thread.
You see, boys and girls, I have a dream…
I dream that, one day, I’ll starting reading a Sadly, No! comment thread which is rudely interrupted by the local yokel. All present continue their erudite and witty converse, Yokely continues to bleat about this, bleat about that, while being ignored totally. No-one so much as deigns to notice. Yokel eventually (which may take a while, given the alarmingly slow rate of uptake of some yokels) realises that (a) he’s made himself look a total dog’s pizzle, and (b) no-one really cares about him here. Yokel thereupon drags his sorry arse off to bother someone else, probably bubbling snot from his nose as he blubbers about our neglect.
That, children, is what I’d like to see. I’d be so excited about that scenario that I’d probably refrain from sleep for a good half hour (which is about a week to a cat).
Perhaps humans are deficient in the disdain gene. I know that cats aren’t. Hell, we invented the concept. Just try, people, that’s all I’m asking. For the kitty cat?
I think I said’4′, but no matter. I am here for one night only, in an effort to stop you being gavined (lied to). As you can see, I have no ability to sway those who WANT to be gavined. But for the rest of you, can’t you come over to the side of rationality? It’s just as fun as being crazy and saying crap like ‘Bush Caused 9/11!’
Not ‘as fun as’. It’s even MORE fun! Since you don’t have to believe BS, and actualy get to spout TRUTH for a change.
Join me, aging hippies!
G’Night! I’m not a liberal, so I’ve got to work in the morning. sure wish I could get one of those government paychecks for doing nothing that libetals get… but no matter. See you in 4ish months! Please spend your subsidies well! It’s partly my cash.
Friggin’ hippies.
Jesus-Christ-licking-come-from-the-bathhouse-floor how come nobody mentioned Frum’s next paragraph?
Read this month’s Vanity Fair…Michael Wolfe details how Guiliani is truly fucking insane! And Qetesh, ditto.
God I hate you liberals so much I’m gonna chop down a buncha trees…’cause I know you liberals never use wood. Or never have any use for wood. ‘Cause us conservatives know our wood is for anally raping young children in Iraq. Later you stupid Hippies, I’ve got to go murder some brown children just because it pisses you Hippies off.
Friggin’ non baby rapin’ hippies.
By any standards, the Republican contest has drawn what ought to be the most impressive array of candidates since … well maybe since ever.
From his point of view, I could see this – I mean, if you liked Dubya, you’ll love these guys!
Hah! It would be just like a liberal to make such a statement as seen above, where someone used my name to make some liberal cause du terre. The funny part is that he’s stuck on the ‘anus’, and the color of the enemy.
Why’s it funny? Because liberals love to talk about rear ends, and are only ok with light-skinned enemies. If the skin-color gets too dark, then we must be the bad guys, right, hippies? Fake Kevin said so!
Furthermore, you’ll be orgasmic about Pelosi and Reid!
if you liked Dubya, you’ll love these guys!
It’s like an axis of weasels!
Yeah, and because only the white enemies are truly enemies. My racial pride is condemned by you friggin’ hippies. I love my wood and dream every night of Dear Leader ‘splaining my wood to me ’cause it pisses you hippies off so much. You liberals who love gay marraige so much are a bunch of FAGS.
Later, you gay lovin’ homophobic faggots.
Wow, and here I was thinking maybe I was commenting a little too much while procrastinating tonight. I guess not. Urgh. I apologize to our feline overlords for having fed the badness.
Don’t take this the wrong way my hippie friends, but your logic is only mowed down faster at your buds at atrios’ or arriana’s site. That’s not a sign of compitence. Perhaps if you would state outright that your goal is to steal from the rich and give to the poor, we could laugh you into meaningless, much like we did with kos, atrios. firelake, and huffpo.
Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE the fact that there are fools like you in the world. It makes me margiinally smarter. I emphasize ‘marginally’.
Hey, did any of you hippies hear that 9/11 wasn’t caused by angry muslims?!?! Google it! Apparently, it was all Bush’s idea, as far as you hippies know!
Friggin’ hippies.
Apology accepted.
Look my hippie friends, my great glorious mower of freedom is going to mow down to the roots your jobless conspiracy theories that are never expresseed on this site. I’m going to mow them down to their ROOTS ’cause I know it will piss off you friggin’ hippies.
Those angry muslims!?!!? are in my sock drawer killin’ my doodz.
friggin’ hippies.
Of course this wasn’t me. But isn’t it interesting how what might be considered a ‘liberal’ would say such tripe? Was it to silence debate? Was it to say deep felt feelings of racism without admitting that he was a racist?
Look, no offense, but I think you guys are silly, mostly because I don’t agree with your world positions. But can’t we agree that the person masquerading as Kevin is in need of help, before he harms others? “Later, you gay lovin’ homophobic faggots.” He says. Is that cool with hippie liberals? I’ll be honest: In the conservative genre, that would count as the suxx0r.
Only Gavin has that crazy dude’s IP address, but I hardly think he’d report the truth. He’s never one so before!
Screw it. Believe whatever crazy crap you want, hippie dudes and dudettes. Believe that America is evil. Whatever.
Friggin’ hippies.
squishiness on abortion
Too graphic.
The fact is, my hippie compadres, that Gary Ruppert is my beeyatch. I have even wingnuttier ideas than he, and I can prove them, if you’ll just read my next hundred and thirty-two posts. Remember what I said about having a job? Just kidding! I can do this stuff all night long, as long as it irritates you hippies.
Damn hippies.
Hippies hippies job sleep hippies trees falling hippies pissing off hippies misguided friends hippies hippies Photoshop Gavin hippies!
Friggin’ hippies.
I can misspell words faster than you hippies can think them up! I can stay up all night writing things to aggravate you hippies and still get to work in the morning and single-handedly support all of you welfare recipients! but don’t get me wrong, my friends. I do it all because I love you. You’re all so very, very wrong, and none of you have enough actual life experience to understand why I am so vehemently anti-hippie, but you’re all hippies, so i guess you’ll never know! Dilute! Dilute! All-One-God-Hippie-Get-A-Real-Job!OK!
Friggin’ hippies.
Yeah, did you homocommieliberaldhimmiannecoulterhaters wish to ‘splain how all the hate is about you and not ME callin’ you faggots a bunch of faggots. Don’t you stupid silly liberals understand that my mom is going to kick my ass if I don’t mow the lawn tomorrow? I really got to go to bed now and save my wood for my Beloved Leader.
friggin’ hippies.
Thank you Fake Kevin for showing your true colors. Us real Kevins would never joke about the truth that you hippies hate so much. That your wrong and murdering a million Iraqis is neccessary to protect my mom’s lawn which I’ve got to mow right now for reals.
friggin hippies!!!!
Kevin must be Annie Angel on steroids.
mmmm….tripe(in jelly).
Just like momma used to make.
Gee, it’s like I can’t tell which one is the real Kevin and which are namestealers. Guess I’ll just have to ignore them all. Pity, that.
I’m on crystal you stupid hippie
I like pie!
Friggin’ hippies.
Kevin: we’ll murder the trees anyway, friggin hippies! I am easily killing over a thousand trees today. Maybe 40,000 this month. All to give the finger to hippie environmentalists. Oh yeah, cash is involved.
You know, if you make just one “Will blow job for money” sign a day instead of making a new one for each passing motorist…
It’s like an axis of weasels!
Don’t mention weasels, or Guiliani will start chewing on his podium again. He hates the Mustelidae, possibly because Repubs can’t take competition on an even playing field.
Vic: “Will blow job for money”
There you friggin’ oral sex haters go again. Is that cool with you clintonlovincommieoralsexhaters ’cause my mom always gives lil’ Kevin a good Bob Dylan hating suck when I finish mowing the 1.3 acre lawn behind the trailer.
friggin’ hippies.
I don’t think I believe that Kevin gets wood quite as often as he claims.
[Friggin hippies!!!!]
Shorter Kevin: “Hippies.”
There. I just freed up your last night before you get all super busy. No need to thank me, it’s what I do, ma’am.
Oh dear! Someone has allegedly chopped down a tree and bragged about it in cyberspace! Whatever am I to do? Oh please say that it is not so. For I am as dense and easily upset as the mythical pansy image of me that exists only in the minds of true he-men such as Kevin.
Oh Kevin, you have so completely unmanned me. Your rough and macho posturing has made me curl into a ball. Truly you stand astride a tower of rigid manhood, proudly brandishing your man-chainsaw, sawing through and toppling the other tall phallic-like objects. How could I have been so foolish to doubt and contradict in any way your wisdom?
May I offer you some pie at this juncture?
Hippies!!!!
Can’t we all just get along?
Ok, either someone is on a full scale squishee bender, or they are tweaking. Also, does the real Kevin use google as his home page, or the fake Kevin?
Friggin hippies.
I would love for him to expound more about global warming. He makes me tingle.
I just want to say that I am available 24/7, and gladly offer up my tasty flaky crustiness to Kevin, in all his Hindu-godlike manifestations.
OK people, this is just a suggestion. Chimp-logging. Someone needs to install a PC in the chimpanzee enclosure at various zoos, and start up a blog in their name. Here I am skimming over the details of making a chimp-proof PC, since I imagine that the primate-language people have sorted it out.
Then, when Kevin gets bored between bouts of lawn-mowing, he can log on, check the latest comment thread, and choose a range of chimp-aggravating actions from the menu. Staring, or sneering, or whatever. His computer sends a STR or SNR packet through the nets to the zoo computers; at their end, the monitor turns on and displays a big pair of staring eyes, or a suitable expression. This can go on until the chimps eventually lose patience and start throwing things at their computer. The computer detects the POO or FRT event, and adds it to the comment thread… and finally (thanks to the magic of the Interducts) Kevin’s monitor displays a screenful of brown. Or yellow, as the case may be. This is definitely what the WWW is all about.
This strikes me as a perfectly good substitute for the kind of interaction Kevin has been seeking. So at the end of the day, he’s happy… we can return to our high-minded discussion of leopard-print skirts, so we’re happy… and the chimps, well, they’ve learned a new way to express their feelings, and that has to be good for them.
Portrait of Kevin
104% off topic.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3AzpByR3MvI
I want that as my ring tone. Not the weird lolita chick part, but the chorus.
Also, I would kill someone for a colonial-era military jacket like that*. Seriously. Like ninja. Name the target.
*Obviously a higher-quality one then the cheap prop outfit used for the bad, kids ADHD TV show. But still.
Dear Kevin,
Do you think I, Ann Althouse, am attractive? It would be very civil of you, as would a lack of comment about my wine ghlash.
*hic*
Do you think trees have their own way of singing?
Oooo, bellybutton lint!
What I particularly like about the chimp-blogging suggestion is that when you get annoyed with someone wasting bandwidth with unnecessary diatribes, you can accuse them of c-logging up the Internet.
“Hah! It would be just like a liberal to make such a statement as seen above, where someone used my name to make some liberal cause du terre”
i thought all your posts on this site were fakes posted to make you look stupid.
“can’t we agree that the person masquerading as Kevin is in need of help, before he harms others?”
whenever you want help “Kevin” just call. once you’re done mowing the lawn of course
That, children, is what I’d like to see. I’d be so excited about that scenario that I’d probably refrain from sleep for a good half hour (which is about a week to a cat).
Perhaps humans are deficient in the disdain gene. I know that cats aren’t. Hell, we invented the concept. Just try, people, that’s all I’m asking. For the kitty cat?
Acutally Qetesh, I was kinda hoping for the exact same thing. I don’t know why people won’t do that either.
i thought all your posts on this site were fakes posted to make you look stupid
That assumes the original shows some sign of compitence.
Atheist, I think this is where you can divide the world into cat people and dog people (because what fun is it if you don’t make a complete generalisation about something?).
Cat people ignore dickheads, and treat them with the disdain they deserve. Dog people keep running after the brightly coloured toys the dickhead keeps throwing out, oblivious to the fact that they’ve run after the same toy a thousand times before.
My patented Cat Vs Dog analogy holds for politics, too. Everyone who thinks that application of force (“authority”) solves everything is clearly a dog person, while those who think that you make the effort to get along are cat people.
Doesn’t hold up forever, of course. Both dogs and cats lick their own arses, and I’m not sure what that says politically.
That all politics is local, of course!
NobodySpecial said,
May 10, 2007 at 15:47
That all politics is local, of course!
_____ Ya know how people always say they spat coffee on their keyboards when they read something funny? When I read your comment I did just that. I think some even came out my nose. Of course, it didn’t hurt that my cat was “playing the cello” at the moment I read it.
Everyone who thinks that application of force (�authority�) solves everything is clearly a dog person, while those who think that you make the effort to get along are cat people.
Qetesh,
I think you are missing a whole class of dog people: the slobbering sycophant type. These are the ones who pant around after the alpha dog, strutting past a defeated enemy as if they were the one who actually fought him off.
Now a well-adjusted alpha dog does what he has to for the pack, and he doesn’t need to make big shows of force to assert his leadership. It’s the aggressive, second tier wannabes that are the source of the trouble.
None of which holds a candle to the cat philosophy: if I can’t have sex with it, play with it, eat it, or be eaten by it, it just doesn’t exist. Words to live by!
Doesn’t hold up forever, of course. Both dogs and cats lick their own arses, and I’m not sure what that says politically.
Cats don’t slurp; dogs do. That might help you make the distinction.
Luckily I wasn’t drinking coffee, but I did laugh immoderately, making my two cats look at me with weary expressions because I woke them from their doze.
No cello-playing here, at the moment. We’ll see what the morrow holds.
Thanks for pointing out the slurping thing, Dorothy. Just what I was looking for.
Yes, the doggy hierarchy thing is important. Cats, of course, reject any notion of hierarchy as alien, since each cat is Queen (or sometimes King) of their own domain, and thus they treat each other as graciously as royalty.
By which, of course, I mean good old-fashioned royalty, not the sort that goes out partying and throws up on the paparazzi.
Cats often seem to save thier cello-playing for when company stops by. Hmmm….. perhaps the next time we have an unpleasant troll visitation, the only response the troll should get is a slightly moist rasp, rasp, rasp.
True enough about the cat people and dog people.
There’s also bird people, who don’t associate with others much at all, just kind of flit around through life looking for some tasty fruits and shiny objects to bring to their temporary nest before migrating somewhere else. Un-attached, unaligned types mostly. Not necessarily unfriendly.
Candy, excellent suggestion. I call upon every patriotic, or matriotic, or neurotic, Sadly, Nosian to join us in our rasping troll response. Together we can defeat the troll horde!
All I see is pie.
A good defense is the best offense! You can lead the battalion, Qetesh.
Atheist, your bird people comment reminds me of the cockateil an ex of mine had. When the ex used to clean his weed, the bird, whom he allowed to fly about the room, would land on the table and eat the seeds. Then she’d go to her perch and hang upside down for a while, bat-like. I’ve actually known a lot of people who were like that, too.
Fish people are interesting. Dreamy, distant, often perfectionists. Spend all day on the computer, occasionally looking away to gaze into the aquarium, only to murmur, “That rock is not at the correct angle to the coral. And I need to add another algae eater.” Tend to be hoarders and dislike moving Cats like aquariums a lot, too, come to think of it.
That cockatiel was like, woah, everything’s spinning maaaan….
I may have know a few fish people. Didn’t like ’em too much, but that’s subjective I guess.
That bird was higher than a Georgia pine, as me old dad used to say.
Aw, isn’t that just darling…Kevin thinks he’s the new Pollock…only Kevin works with a ‘different’ medium, his own feces.
OT, as though this thread could get any more OT, but the Gonzales testimony has been interesting. That Bush lap dog is going down hard. I’ve been following it on Truthout.
Gonzales testimony has been interesting
Yeah, I guess I should follow that better. I’ll check it out.
What I commonly try to follow is more the millitary developments of our occupations, and also all those carrier groups in the Persian Gulf. But certainly domestic concerns can’t be ignored, especially when they pertain to the Neocon’s “Unitary Executive” theories. Thanks for pointing that out.
Oh, so it’s another one of these threads, is it?
Herr Doktor: I know some linguists, though they’re not the sort that would have chimpanzee-proof computers. I’ll ask around to see if anyone has some, because I think your experiment is a terrific idea.
And if people get tired of lengthy feces-hurling bouts from the chimps online, they can write a Greasemonkey filter that boils it all down to:
I like poo!
What is the whole ‘Pie’ thing about around here anyhow?
That all politics is local, of course!
Catching up after all that pie – this is really goddam funny.
Whew.
Then there’s the turtle people, who just sit around like gigantic lumps, feeling perfectly safe in their hard shells, and pull their heads in at the first sign of trouble.
And the rabbit people. They just fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
I hope I don’t break the Internets with that.
This thread is not very ribald at all!
Seems somewhat piebald to me.
Horsefeathers!
You try walking aroun the mall in a ribald suit, Kathleen!
atheist: There is a script you can use so that anytime someone like annieangel or kevin posts, all you see is “I like pie!” It’s saved some sanity around here, during particularly bad troll infestations. i believe it was introduced by a gentleman called I’mJohnGalt. I’m being forced to do something productive now, but perhaps someone could point you in the right direction, if you’re interested.
So, instead of a pie scrip Kevin gets a poo scrip?
Sweet!
Kevin makes me nostalgic for JackGoff.
atheist: There is a script you can use so that anytime someone like annieangel or kevin posts, all you see is “I like pie!�
The script is here but you need Firefox with Greasemonkey to use it.
All three are well worth the money.
In re: Rasping.
Here ya go.
This thread raises so many questions….
If 500 trees are cut down by Kevin and everyone has their pie script running, do the trees make a sound?
How can I be a frigging (sorry, friggin) hippie if I don’t know how to frig?
If a tree falls on a mime in the forest, does it make a sound?
Who cares? One less mime is never a bad thing. =)
” , !”
You guys just don’t get it. There’s pies inside the tree trunks, man!
One addendum to the cat philosophy; if it feeds you, favor it.
Kevin, in all his Hindu-godlike manifestations.
Hey! There’s only one avatar of a Hindu god in this community, and it sure as hell isn’t this Kevin dweeb. Oughtn’t he to be mowing lawns or chopping down trees or some other He-Man activity, anyway?
I’ll bet his own mother doesn’t leave millk ‘n’ choc at his shrine! I’ll bet he doesn’t even have a shrine! So there!
PS Don’t worry, I don’t eat the chocolate because it makes cats, even avatars of Hindu gods, sick, so I give it to the handmaiden. She appears humbly grateful. All is well.
*waves paw dismissively at Teh Kevin* You are not necessary to my existence in any way. You may go and do…whatever it is that you do.
Kevin, look! is that a Spotted Owl? I think it just called you an asshole!
SHOOT IT!!!!1!! SHOOT IT NOW, MOTHERFUCKA!!!!!
Eh, Cumguzzling Monster Twats IV was a thin premise, and you could tell Steve Guttenberg was phoning it in. Now Cumguzzling Monster Twats VII: Mission to Moscow, THAT was a movie.
What?
WF
since each cat is Queen (or sometimes King) of their own domain, and thus they treat each other as graciously as royalty.
Medieval royalty. Pretending to ignore each other while vigilantly eyeballing any possible incursion. Punctuated by outbursts of ninja leaps and screaming, which may be either warfare or sex, or both.
Which is why I say MSM people are dogs, and bloggers are cats.
Howdy again, my hippie friends! I have to go back to work at 3 AM to oversee the installation of an Air Products oxygen injection system so I can’t ‘be’ with you that long (that’s right. We burn crap. A LOT of it. ‘Cause we hate humanity or something. HAHAHAHAH! I burn stuff in your name, my hippie friends! The evil carbon dioxide, made in your name, in massive amounts! Now you can say ‘Kevin made all of this carbon dioxide in my name, and all I got was a bunch of CO2 and this lousy t-shirt’!) So let’s get right to it, shall we? I’ll do you in reverse order.
Hippie/spiritualist wannabe Ganesh Bengal Cat said: “PS Don’t worry, I don’t eat the chocolate because it makes cats, even avatars of Hindu gods, sick, so I give it to the handmaiden. She appears humbly grateful. All is well.”
I don’t think I can add more to that. See where hippieism leads you? “Dig” on that, hippies.
The Gay Brad says: “One addendum to the cat philosophy; if it feeds you, favor it.”
You guys totally dig cats, huh? I kinda like them too, but not quite the way that you guys do. That’s sick, dude. Even for a Brad who’s ‘different’.
Friggin’ Hippie Pie said: Ah who cares what she said! She’s brave enough to admit that she’s a friggin’ hippie. Even if she doesn’t shower, I say, kudos to her! Speak truth to power, friggin hippie pie! You guys do it so well! But don’t speak truth to some kind of power who might fight back, like Islam. Better to say bad things about Bush or Republicans, since they support freedom of speech. Say things like “No blood for oil” and stuff. Not things like “Islam equals misogyny.” The first will get you rave reviews from the silly hippies at sadlyno, but the second will get you killed!
‘Nuff said? Nope, there’s more.
Dan Someone said: Heck, I can’t even repeat it! Is this a person in good standing in Sad’s hippietown?
It’s funny, I guess, that the liberal idiots would rather fake that they were me than refute my often ridiculous arguments. It’s kind of sad the way Gavin allows his ‘buddies’ to do it, but that’s the way he’s made things.
Pretty funny though, and gives great insight into the lack of logic of the left. Don’t discount me, say horrible things, and then say you’re me! Friggin’ hippies.
Hah! I’ve shut up the hippies! That’s a big win, in the wordly take on things.
See you tomorrow, after I’ve caused the emission of roughly 73,256 lbs of CO2 in Gavin’s name. Quit whining, hippies. I said ‘pounds’, not ‘tons’.
Friggin’ hippies.
Rasp, rasp, rasp.
Where’s everybody gone? Donchu like cello?
Duros62: UR responsible for me spendn n hourz lookn kitty pron. Tnx a lot.
I’ll do you in reverse order.
Pretty gay sounding, Kevin.
Oh, and Kevin? Study hall’s over. Go back to class.
off Sulking because he was ignored. Worked like a charm tho.
Qetesh the Abyssinian, this pic is for you. (male almost grown kitten grooms adult male dog).
Hey there, my hippie friends!
Simba said: “Pretty gay sounding, Kevin.” Never said I wasn’t, dude. But don’t get your hopes up. I’ve already found a man, and he’s got what they call on prime-time TV, a ‘vijayjay’. Also: boobies! He totally rocks. It’s a small price to pay that I must call him a girl, per his request. Guys are silly, no?
“Oh, and Kevin? Study hall’s over. Go back to class.”
Sadly, my time for learning is over :(. I’m stuck believing that hippies or Democrats are idiots who neither understand the world, or even simple economics. Don’t hate me because I recognize the left’s lack of ability to understand numbers, huh? Instead, hate me because I’m a jerk. Because I am. When the left comes up with silly reasons that we should be huggy/kissy with the jihadis, or that we should actually blame ourselves, I ‘splain why they’re idiots, without wasting a breath. Yup, I’m a jerk. Hate me for that.
Update: My calculations were in error! Our new plan will create 77,124 lb of CO2 a day, not 73,256 lbs! My Zionist plans of raising the level of the ocean by 80 feet have almost come to fruitiion! Next: I plan to become Jewish so that my Zionist plans make more sense.
Friggin’ hippies.
Bill the Pilgrim said:”off Sulking because he was ignored. Worked like a charm tho[sic].”
No. It didn’t.
Rasp, rasp, slurp, rasp. Cello time again.
Qetesh the Abyssinian, this pic is for you.
Awwwww. How cute. Nice to see the boys doing their share of the laundry, too.
Rasp, rasp, rasp. Slurp. Rasp.
Kevin, you know we are having a header contest at Three Bulls. I bet you won’t enter. Don’t think you can win?
Oh my God! Is Kevin for real? That was the fucking funniest thing I’ve ever seen! And I can’t decide if it was funnier if it was for real, or if it’s funnier if it wasn’t for real.
Geez, the wingnuts are getting stupider by the day.
Kevin’s post are too long. Anyone have the cliff notes?
Kevin’s post are too long. Anyone have the cliff notes?
He likes pie.
Slightly longer shorter Kevin:
I like pie, friggin hippies!
Even longer slightly longer shorter Kevin:
I like pie, so I’m going to write stuff to piss off the kind people Rush Limbaugh told me people who disagree with him (and therefore me) are.
um, “kind OF people.”
Qetesh
Sorry for the kitty porn effect.
This’ll make up for it. Not all dogs are philistines.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/7371579@N04/493880539/
Hey, I have a job, dirty hippies!
Well, it’s not much of a job. It’s soul crushingly boring, and it doesn’t pay well. But I contribute!
Well, not really. I work for an insurance company denying treatment to poor sick people.
But it …. you know, it kinda looks like fun to play hacky sack in the sun. But No! I’ve got a lawn to mow!
You know, a hippy once scared me. When I was four….. I had always lived in our little suburb, and never saw anybody who looked different. I wet ’em. The hippy was nice though, and took me back to my mom, who screeched at him and called the cops. Then she spanked me for playing with the dirty dirty hippy and hosed me down naked in th driveway while all the neighbors watched….
did I say that out loud?
I now declare this thread kevinned. *royal wave*
Rasp, rasp, rasp, rasp, slurp, burp, rasp…..
Ah, this is satisfying!
Where was I?
rasp rasp rasp…
Rasp, rasp, rasp, startled look, rasp, slurp.
You’re right, there’s really nothing like it!
Rasp, rasp. Hey, Luschka, c’mere! Rasp, rasp, dig in claws, rasp.
rasp, rasp, rasp, rasp, rasp, rasp, slurp.
flings poo.
You dirty hippies are dirty! And you’re hippies! And you’re dirty! And you don’t have jobs! And you are dirty hippies! And I have a job, unlike you dirty hippies, so I can only post every two or three minutes!
Dirty hippies!
(Oops! I forgot to spell some words wrong so you wouldn’t know if it was for real or not! Sorry.)