Bananas have appeal for a lot of people!

I just want to find pigman.

Umm, the chimpanzee is in the zoo. The whole idea is for people to be able to see the animals in the zoo. Here’s a crazy thought. If you don’t want people to look at the chimpanzee, don’t put him in the zoo!!

Similar Regulations:

Sign in Library: Please, do not read the books.

Sign in Hospital: No Sick People Allowed

Sign in Parking Lot: Pedestrians Only

mikey

You try dressing like a chimp and walking through the mall.
See if you like how that feels.

To mikey:

There is a difference between looking and LOOKING. Looking like when you see someone really interesting on the subway and you make broad over-the-head sweeps of the crowd so that you can discretely memorize the way his/her jeans fill out is totally different from sitting in the seat accross and staring, finger pointing, gum smacking, camera phone clicking. Try it out, you will see.

Monkeys aren’t really that different from people. Certainly when it comes to making eyes, picking fights, and copulating.

is there anything that cannot be made funnier with the addition of a banana?

It is a sad day when an article in the Washington times is more interesting and better-informed than a Sadly, No! blog post poking fun at it.
Come on, guys! The reasons for the request are spelled out in the article.

is there anything that cannot be made funnier with the addition of a banana?

Michelle Malkin? Well … I guess if she vlogged with it … with close-ups … then maybe.

A sign posted on the glass enclosure asks onlookers not to stare at the apes. “Look away when an animal seeks to make contact with you, or take a step back,” it says.

Good advice when forced to interact with rethuglicans, too!

Sign at Sadly, No!:

Please do not mock the wingnuts.

BTW, Michelle Malkin doing the evolution thing with the banana would make my penis disappear.

BTW, Michelle Malkin doing the evolution thing with the banana would make my penis disappear.

Behold, the atheist’s nightmare. Now if you study a well-made ping-pong ball …

Ah, Ann Althouse’s Right Breast gets all the good lines…

I’m guessing by “staring” the zoo is referring to long, direct eye contact, which to apes is a threat behavior. And it’s probably as much for safety as it is for “politeness”: chimps are neither small nor weak, and I would never want to piss one off.

(Twenty years ago, I saw the silverback male gorilla in the London Zoo attack the glass trying to get at the idiot who was teasing him. The whole primate building shook like there was an earthquake. Idiot, of course, thought it was sooooooo funny….)

You try dressing like a chimp and walking through the mall.
See if you like how that feels.

I did.
I did.
Thanks for the tip.

Listen, the guy was just lucky it was only a banana peel. Could have been a handful of monkey shite. Could have been a shot of monkey sperm in the face, ‘cos some of those dudes really like wanking.

Hey, you try masturbating in a cage and see how…no, I’ll stop there.

Sign in Library: Please, do not read the books.

This reminds me, is there anything dumber than those road signs that point out where libraries are by using a picture of person reading a book? Why can’t they just make sign with the word “Library”? Ya know, if I can’t read the word library, chances are pretty good that’s not where I’m going.

Look, goddammit! Apes are not Monkeys!
Apes have flattened ribcages (like ours) and move through trees by brachiating (swinging under the branches with their arms)
Monkeys have ribcages shaped more like dogs, and primarily move through trees by running along the tops of the branches.

Monkeys have much smaller brains than apes.
They are more like squirrels in a lot of ways.

Staring at a chimpanzee is a THREAT behavior. Cut it out!

I like apes. Don’t fuck with them or make fun of them.

dAVe is abso-fugging-lutely correct, apes are not monkeys. And humans are apes. Chimps & gorillas are our cousins; LET ‘EM THE HELL OUT OF THE ZOOS, GIVE ‘EM A THOROUGH SHAVING, SLAP SOME GAP THREADS ON THEM, AND LET ‘EM GO SHOPPING AT THE MALL LIKE THE REST OF US!! (I’d be very interested to see which retail establishments they wish to decorate with their flying feces.)
P. S. Or a Thoreau shaving.

Scarcely a day goes by where I don’t think “Ya know, there was a Seinfeld about that.”