Shorter LGF Commenters

Mass Murder at Virginia Tech


  • While it may be premature to assume that the killer was a Muslim jihadi, much blame is due liberals and their anti-gun. . .say, is it just me, or are Asian people actually sort of creepy?

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard.


Comments: 64

Hysterical Woman

I may just be a gun bigot, but I don’t see how a conceled gun would help you if some random guy is shooting people. If guns were magic bullet shield then no soldier would ever get shot.


Meanwhile, over at Hot Air, the eliminationist version of the Tootsie Pop question is asked:

– How many posts does it take to get to the Muslimicious center of the Blame Pop?

– I know! Let’s ask the Prophet!

(*post* *post* *post* *CRUNCH*)

(answer: 13).


Well the theory is that someone would shoot the guy before he killed 32 people. It certainly isn’t impossible.

Of course you would have to figure out what % of college students would actually try to get a permit and out of those how many would bring their gun to class on a given day and out of those how many weren’t psychopaths.


… and had the gun training necessary to enable them to overcome their very natural panic and get off clean shots…



Andy Warhol’s estate is going to sue you for plagiarism over that pic…

By my watch the media has already been missing the point over this for at least 8 hours now…


In Texas, you can’t take a concealed weapon onto school grounds. What are Viriginia’s laws?

It’s possible someone could have taken him out, but not likely. Someone could have had throwing knives. Someone else could have had a baseball bat. Someone might have had a blowgun with a cyanide-tipped arrow.

Real life murder does not play out like a movie or 24. It’s not like some badass would whip out a couple of Glocks, dive across the room in slow motion, shield a really hot college girl from the mayhem and land 26 rounds into the guy. I’m getting my CCW permit, but not because I want to be a vigilante or save the world from evil.

Gun politics were not the first thing that came to my mind.

33 people dead. Damn. That’s depressing.


* Pakis are considered “Asian.”

Wasn’t Debbie in Prussian Blue or something?

Hysterical Woman

Debbie’s insistence on adding ALL CAPS COMMENT makes her look even worse. Still, good thing she doesn’t delete them. I like the guy who pointed out that if Muslim terrorist are shooting up schools here, that actually makes Bush look bad.


What, if anything, are these guys & gals saying about the missing WH and RNC emails?


I’m shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here!


Pakis are considered “Asian.”


Debbie’s so busted. She knows that South Asians are popularly called “Asians” – just not in the United States, but in Britain. But then she pretends not to know that “Paki” is a racial slur, which it sure as hell is – just not here (not popularly anyway), but in Britain.

What a total cobag. Equally desperate to miscomprehend the term “Asian” as she is to get away with race-baiting Muslims.


why does she have to play so fast and loose with grammar? i think she needs a kick in the face. no really, will someone please kick her in the face?



I’m not going back but I checked out the Hot Air comments earlier and my favorite two morans are “Dr. Blather” and “januarius” or some shit like that. The first piranha wants to use this shooting as an excuse to arm every student, teacher, cafeteria worker and custodian in the nation to the teeth and the second is convinced that the lamestream media is plotting behind closed doors on how best to conceal that this was really a muslim. There are also the requisite attempts to blame Iran. What’s more disturbing is that there are a bunch of commenters typing with one hand and feverishly speculating about the weapons used and how good of a shot this guy must have been. The quote that must have caused a massive virtual bukkake moment across the HotAir nation is here:

I was, a few decades ago, a damn good combat pistol shooter (real world, not IPSC type competitive range shooting). As good as I was, I just can’t picture me being able to achieve such a kill ratio, even against an unarmed crowd. So, either engineering students in general have become as sheep-like as liberal arts students, or this guy had a lot of training, was dang good at it and lucky as heck.

Qetesh the Abyssinian

Lawnguylander, that comment deserves to be bronzed and preserved for posterity. The breathless ‘real life’ narration, the spurious use of terms like ‘kill ratio’, are thrilling enough, but what makes it perfect is the last half of the last sentence. How can anyone who gets hard thinking of guns say something as asinine as ‘dang good at it and lucky as heck’?

“Hey, my mom doesn’t like me to swear.” Yeah, carry on, dude. ‘S not like we’re all laughing at you…


Hey, has anyone heard from Adam Yoshida lately?

S. T. D. Hanson

As a professor, I heartily approve of the idea of every student packing for every class, JUST IN CASE. Now about the grade inflation…

a different brad

Check this out. Livejournal (hah) of a guy who was misidentified as the shooter in a bunch of forums online.
Apparently there are asian LGFers, too.
Coming out. I am not the shooter. Through this experience, I have received numerous death threats, slanderous accusations, and my phone is out of charge from the barrage of calls. Local police have been notified of the situation.
Long quote, but if you don’t follow the link y’all still need to see this.
“My original intention was to wait until I got AdSense on my site and donating all the proceeds to Charity. However, this situation has now spiraled out of control. I am now confirming that I am not the shooter. I will be available for interview by a news agency to clear my name, talk about the experience, and give my opinion on how the situation could have turned out better if other students were allowed to be armed. I will only speak with individuals who are interested in donating to charities resulting from today’s events. Please e-mail all correspondence to

a different brad

Whoops, meant that to be a little longer, but that’s the important part.


Lawnguylander, please, please, *please* tell me you fucking made that up. Please. Jesus Christ.


I was, a few decades ago, a damn good combat pistol shooter …

I think that’s the same guy who “got laid” over summer vacation. She was from France. There’s no way to contact her. But it really happened.

Random Observer

I like how the news media, whenever ANYTHING happens, has to mention terrorism. Corey Lidle crashes into a building – hmm could be terrorism. Shooting at a school – hmm could be terrorism.

And then there are the people who are convinced, depsite all evidence to the contrary, that something like a school shooting just *has* to be crazed Muslims.


RO – that’s because they want to re-experience that circa 9/11 feeling of kill-em-all abandon so badly, they can taste it.


“I was, a few decades ago, a damn good combat pistol shooter (real world, not IPSC type competitive range shooting). As good as I was, I just can’t picture me being able to achieve such a kill ratio,”

CNN is useless for details, but this wasn’t a damn shoot house, this was a kid with a gun (dun know the type. CNN says he fired ~30 in about two minutes, so it was prolly a semi pistol with a extra-long magazine. The kind of magazine that USED to be illegal) who chained the doors shut, walked into a class room full of bored, half-awake kids and started shooting.

“So, either engineering students in general have become as sheep-like as liberal arts students,”

…wow. Right, they should have wiped out their fucking M60s and returned fire before the second shot. Dick head.

“this guy had a lot of training, was dang good at it and lucky as heck.”

Yeah. Not like there’s anywhere to train with guns in West Virginia. At All.

My original post on this got eaten, but this type of arm-chair bravado pisses me off to no end, and I’m just wondering how long until some idiot pulls up that African church shooting thing again.


It must be sad for them, this could have been the terror attack they are all hoping for.


You know, the thing is, it is terrorism, but in it’s most basic sense: that which can cause terror. Maybe as a byproduct of whatever that student was suffering from, but I’m fairly sure there will be a few students who’ll be a bit jumpy after this. And I don’t blame them.

I think it’s rather telling that Teh Nuts assume it’s a Muslim terrorist. As if there aren’t good ol’ white boys who aren’t either. So it’s either “gotta be a durned Towelhead” or “The student is insane, but damn, he’s got a wonderful aim. WOW!”. It’s as if the two are mutually exclusive, and they’re not.


Oops look like I spoke too soon.

“The execution of 33 people with small caliber arms… a student visa… a nation with a population of muslims officialy at 20 million and unofficialy at up to 200 million. A nation bordering pakistan, india, ubekistan, kasikstan. A militant group of Uighurs. No ID, No face suicide. 3 bomb threat to test security. A state wide “state of emergencyâ€?. 50% kill rate…. on going police activity around state. Al Queda cells busted in the western provinces of China today.”

A Chinese Al Queda operative, sneaky terrorists!

a different brad

Meh, somehow I butchered that and put my own words in the middle of the quote. Don’t comment and drive, folks.


At least he didn’t force any female students to wear scarves.

That would have been barbaric.


D Sidhe, sorry, I could never make something like that up.

And Qetesh, what struck me most was that he had pictured in his head the “kill ratio” he considers himself capable of attaining. On a day when a bunch of college students get murdered he and a bunch of other soulless fucks are imagining whether they could have beat the actual shooter’s high score.

Meanwhile over in the top right corner at the Fox News site their “Top Video” is titled:

Deadly Force

Firearms expert on handguns used in Virginia Tech massacre

They know their audience. Gotta give them that.


this type of arm-chair bravado pisses me off to no end …

C’mon, Some Guy.

If that Hot Air dude had been anywhere near the area, he would have totally rappelled down from the dormitory roof, burst into the room and roundhouse kicked the gun out of the perp’s hand while quipping, “A heel for a heel!” and then blasted the baddie to Kingdom Come with the twin spring-loaded .45 automatics racked on precision-fitted wrist sheaths under his sleeves.

And you know it.


blasted the baddie to Kingdom Come with the twin spring-loaded .45 automatics racked on precision-fitted wrist sheaths under his sleeves

Which reminds me… 24 is on. Gotta dash!


Well, now we have to attack China. We can fulfill Rummy’s dream. China will be our ENEMY!

Nah, they’re not Muslims. The wingnuts are too invested in that particular target. There’s too much narrative to rewrite at this late date. Although, that freeper sonic quoted is trying his best. I wouldn’t mind if the wingnuts spread their hate around to some other races. Maybe it will keep them from finalizing their Final Solution for the Muslims.


For those with strong stomachs, check this out from Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler commenter “ACLPoo”.


It’s a crowded field but this is priceless,

“#927 Klaus 4/16/2007 6:06:05 pm PDT

Islamists plan long term. They would need to disarm the US citizenry – their greatest threat to taking over the United States internally. A senseless mass murder raises the volume of the anti-gun enthusiasts. the islamists would need this to appear unconnected to jihad. Enough events like this could very easily lead to disarmament of the public.

I propose that this may be a covert islamist terrorist attack for the eventual, long term purpose of disarming the public. Remember Lee Malvo and John Muhammad. Is there a pattern here?”

Sadly, no.


I mean, I love this site more than I can say.

But, no, with the linking to LGF, gross.

No, no. It’s something you avoid, darlings.

a different brad

In a strange way, reading these comments makes me feel better, some of em, anyway. The stuff in the post/comment D Aristophanes linked to is horrible, yet later on there’s a comment that’s just…… I don’t even know.
“It’s only tinfoil-hat time after the fact – right now, it’s just me wanting to be wrong.”
His own words, about his words.


Oh, fer cryin out loud…

Do these sad little fuckers live in a Tom Clancy fantasy?

Can any of them (or you?) really address killing at eyeball range?

I’m pretty fuckin sickened.

This isn’t an adventure novel…

This is a fucking lunatic with two guns who butchered a bunch of kids..

Kill ratio…You sad little fuck…

G’night. Sleep well…



Mikey, they can’t, but that’s not the point of their point, now is it?

They’re just using what the have to make theirs, probably. I’m kind of weirded out by that site Little Green Footballs. That is weird shit, and it makes me fucking pissed off. WTF is the matter with those fucking strange people, really?


Full Disclosure: I’ve watched, and I’ve hedged, and played around, and wanted to comment, but I haven’t. This will work out one way or the other.


D Aristophanes: ACLPoo writes: “If he was part of a political movement of some sort, execute everyone affiliated with it.” Sure would be a shame if he was a college republican or an NRA member!

The LGF mantra of ‘Muslim until proven kufir’ when it comes to any crime is sad. Their hate seriously hinders their reasoning abilities.


By which I mean, I’ve watched, and hedged commenting here. I like this little site. It makes me happy. I do love when smart people are present, which is usually.


Wow, Schlussel’s ALL CAPS replies to commenters saying that ‘Paki’ ain’t a racial slur? Not just stupid, but a total fucking loon.


A Chinese Al Queda operative, sneaky terrorists!

Never mind that the Freepers are too ignorant to know that the Chinese suppression of the Muslim Uyghur minority is being done under the bullshit guise of their being linked to Al Qaeda. Never mind that five of the Uyghurs shipped to Guantanamo had to be found political asylum in Albania when released without charge. Oh, and that they don’t actually look like the majority of Chinese, because they’re Turkic.


I like the notion that the kids that were killed got killed because they were too stupid and lazy to do anything other than die. Hur hur hur what are they liberal arts students?


mikey said @ April 17, 2007 at 6:47

Oh, fer cryin out loud…

Do these sad little fuckers live in a Tom Clancy fantasy?

Can any of them really address killing at eyeball range?

Does the fact that all of them are Yellow Elephants tell ya about their qualifications and mentality on dealing with potential deadly threats?


Dear Sirs,
I, Ann Althouse, would like to note that my colleague, Debbie Schlussel, is not Don Imus, as she herself points out a number of times. I, Ann Althouse, can understand the confusion, but they are different people. Please take note.
Furthermore, I, Ann Althouse, would like to note that I have been to Virginia and seen Virginia Tech sports teams mentioned on television a great number of times. And I, Ann Althouse, work at a university, in a school building, at that. If this had taken place in a different school in a different school it might somehow have involved me, Ann Althouse. The thought boggles the mind, to think…. ooooo!
My own feces!


Pardon me, Ann Althouse. That should read “if this had taken place in a different school in a different state”. I, Ann Althouse, apologize for the error. The incivility of this place, no preview button?, makes me, Ann Althouse, want to leave quickly, and not proofread.


I cannot fathom the mind of the turtle. Seriously, I can’t. They’re like, all turtley. You know.


Yet they’re all doing it, even the one in front who must be imagining the back end of a turtle.


I should never have clicked that linke.
Ann Althouse is coming to Brooklyn.
The horror
the horror.

a different brad

I also should have logged back in and looked at what I was posting.


freerepublic: “A nation bordering pakistan, india, ubekistan, kasikstan.”

Not ubekistan and kasikstan!!! I wasn’t aware there WAS a nation that bordered all of these countries.


You can’t make China the next big enemy because the wingnuts are too vested in this one? I call intentional grounding. A ten yard penalty and loss of down.

Ever see Rambo III – our hero fighting along with the heroic taliban against the Godless Soviet Russkies? As soon as the Commies vanished we found a new ‘mother of all enemies’ that we might fight against for all eternity. The second the dollar deflates and we pay Luxembourg style prices for knock-off Chinese goods at Walmart the wingnuts will be ready. They need an enemy. Their lives are completely empty without one.


oh noes our precious precious guns. this tragedy might actually have an impact


See? This is why I never go wandering around the wingnutosphere alone! Those alleged “people” exhibit not a single shred of humanity amongst the lot of ’em. Why do they enjoy awful events like this one so predictably? I suppose it never, never occurs to the wingnuts that crimes like this one are committed by people who are, in essence, exactly the same as them: consumed by hatred and fear. A pox on ’em all!


These people not only see eeevil Muslims behind every tree, but they also think the moon is following them.


since when does South Korea border Uzbekistan? by osmosis?

What strikes me the most absurd development this morning is that Our Prznit is going to hie himself to Blacksburg to help The Nation with the Healing Process.

The LAST fucking thing law enforcement officials in this poor, stricken town needs is to take on the horrendous, expensive, stressful and overt-time heavy burden of a Preznitial visit by the Hugger-in–Chief.

It’s fucking obscene. This motherfucker is coming down and all manpower is going to be diverted away from the crime scene to directing traffic on the state roads.


I cannot fathom my Left Breast! Seriously, I can’t. It’s like all mammarial, you know!


From what I’ve heard, the shooter was a naturalised American, originally from South Korea. More than likely, he was also a Christian (most South Koreans are). So, he wasn’t an illegal alien or even on a student visa, nor was he from a Muslim country, nor was he Muslim.

I’m now trying to guess what possible spin the right wingnut sphere will put to these facts…

My money is on a Manchurian candidate type of thing.


Random Observer: I like how the news media, whenever ANYTHING happens, has to mention terrorism.

D. Aristophanes: that’s because they want to re-experience that circa 9/11 feeling of kill-em-all abandon so badly, they can taste it.

I agree, D.A., but this kind of crap has been happening since forever. Remember when gangs were the big boogeyman in the early 1990s? Around then, there was a murder here in Salt Lake City – one man killed another man; lots of witnesses, well-known motive, and so on – a very cut-and-dried case. The only thing that wasn’t known for sure was whether either of the men had anything to do with any gangs. But the news reporter had something like this to say:

“We do not know at this time whether either man belonged to a GANG or whether this incident was GANG-related; we’ve contacted Lt. Whitebread of the GANG-violence task force of the SLCPD. He says that at this time there is no evidence that GANGs were involved but GANG violence experts are searching for clues that GANG rivalry caused this…”

The terrorism fad might be wearing thin now, but the relentless screaming heads of television (RIP, Media Horse) will always be looking for that new button to push to get us to shut our brains off and quiver in fear. Preferably, from their POV, racist – helps that kill-’em-all fever you mention.


[…] the victims themselves (for not tackling the guy as he was reloading) and, of course, Muslims, Muslims, Muslims, and more […]


So, either engineering students in general have become as sheep-like as liberal arts students,

Of course, now it turns out the killer was an English Major.


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