Wait, We Didn’t Order The Poo Poo Blather
But that’s what Michelle Malkin is serving. Umm, thanks, but no thanks.
Above: Where Michelle would prefer to watch
liberals drop their kids off at the pool.
Dear lord, what is it with these perverted reactionaries? First there was Dan Riehl’s ‘Hot For Teacher’ fetish, and now Michelle Malkin ‘Enema-tizes the We-shat-on’, bakes Schiesse-Crispy Treats, brews up a pot of s.h.i. tea, and otherwise indulges her scat fetish:
“Walden Pond, Fifth Avenue style”
Plus: Defecating on an American flagA “guilty liberal” family tries to live a “no impact” lifestyle in New York City.
The New York Times reporter, Pamela Green(!), chronicles the family in “The Year Without Toilet Paper.”
[…]
So, they refuse to wipe their two-year-old’s bottom and have sworn off paper to save the trees.
While we’re on the subject of liberal crap: […]
[…]Perhaps the most disturbing scene of the afternoon, however, involved the man who pulled down his pants in front of women and children and defecated on a burning U.S. flag. This disgusting act actually elicited cheers from some members of the crowd, but we hope that the emotion it produces in the community is one of revulsion…
A few fringe actors? Not.
Sure, Michelle, we liberals are all a bunch of GG Allins! But it seems you’re enthralled by our act a little too much if you know what I mean (and I think you do).
Perhaps the most disturbing scene of the afternoon, however, involved the man who pulled down his pants in front of women and children and defecated on a burning U.S. flag.
My first response was “Sure, and they all spat on troops, and cried out “Hail, Satan our master”. Then they roasted a baby alive (an aborted baby, naturellement) and all had homosexual sex.
My second response was “Look, this is a public place. It’s the middle of fucking Wah-shing-ton, fercrissakes. There are at the very least hundreds of people around, plus plenty of cops. Who’s going to drop their dacks and lower a rope under those conditions?” To say nothing of the fact that anti-war protesters are not really the sort to do those sorts of things. Carry sternly-worded placards, yes. Shout slogans in unison, yes. Crap on a flag? I think not.
My third response was “I can almost hear the sizzling hair.”
Wait a minute, she thinks some shmo shat on a burning flag? What’s it called when a writer carelessly throws together things in order to make a point?
Mrs. Krabappel and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and then the baby looked at me.
Then they burned a flag.
What’s it called when a writer carelessly throws together things in order to make a point?
Talking out of her arse?
Hey, I was putting the damn fire out, OK? You got a problem, you take it up with whoever set fire to the flag in the first place, OK?
Talking out of her arse?
Cliche A-Go-Go?
They had 30,000 counter protesters and she had such a cute hat. Certainly if a flag were burned and ..other events transpired..we’d have Wingnut Production photographs. Even just one little pic from one of the 30,000 to document the atrocity and to liven up her post. Just a small piece of evidence. Something.
Sadly, no.
What’s it called when a writer carelessly throws together things in order to make a point?
Citizen journalism! Citizen journalism rendering the dinosaur media obsolete.
Mrs. Krabappel and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and then the baby looked at me.
Then they burned a flag.
EXACTLY
presumably after shitting on the burning flag they left it on someone’s doorstep rang the bell then ran away
I believe that this fine newspaper is the source of the story about the protest in Portland. The facts are not important its about how you feel, this poor individual was probably so scared of being drafted that his sphincter spontaneously released. At least I didn’t have read a quote from this patriot. http://www.portlandtribune.com/opinion/story.php?story_id=117459283544877600
How long until the wingnuttosphere is calling on every Democrat, every liberal blog to denounce this quite possibly fictitious event, while all the time loudly shouting how it’s what every democrat is really thinking?
So, they had eleventy-hundred super-patriots on hand to defend America’s honor against the Islamocommienazipeacenik horde and they all stood idly by while some Hippie pinched a Cleveland Steamer on a burning flag? That’s some nice defendin’, right there.
I mean, Jesus, does she not even see how the one lie undermines the other lie?
Wait a second…is this site run by a bunch of Bush Derangement Syndrome loons?
Yep, all of us hate Bush here not because he has done things as a President (our President) that we strongly disagree with, but just because we’re insane in the membrane. Only lunatics would ever disagree with the President of the United States.
How about that Bill Clinton?
What’s it called when a writer carelessly throws together things in order to make a point?
It”s called lying.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go cook bacon in the buff.
while some Hippie pinched a Cleveland Steamer on a burning flag?
That’s fucking hilarious. I saw a kid of about 14 on the subway the other day wearing a Cleveland Steamers jersey and burst out laughing. He seemed very pleased that someone got it.
Oh. The source of this claim is the fucking Portland Tribune. Folks, the Tribune is a bought-and-paid-for rag, a mouthpiece of the Portland Business Alliance. The only thing they hate more than the city government is those goddamn filthy hippie protestors. I note that they claim that the riot cops only came out in response to a cop being knocked off a bike. I don’t believe that for a second — the Portland police have pretty consistently busted out the goon squad with the pepper spray and batons whenever there’s a peep of organized protest.
All I can say is that I’ve witnessed events in the past where non-protestors damaged property to make it look like the protestors did it. For what it’s worth, even the Trib claims that this was a “small splinter group.” Of course, the Portland media has a long, illustrious history of patching together ominous pictures of black blockers marching with a few shots of smashed mailboxes and broken windows, and then some angry protestors, and turning that into a story.
In any case, I’ll consider taking this seriously the moment that Michelle Malkin chooses to address the fact that her thuggish friends in the Gathering of Eagles were harassing and slandering peaceful protestors with no provocation other than their own ugly prejudice. Yeah, I’ll be holding my breath.
I’m guessing Michelle was watching Mr. Show and got confused:
Um, wouldn’t shitting on a burning flag, you know, hurt? Note that the “story” comes from the opinion page of the PT, not the news section. Funny that.
The part I loved in the Portland Tribune story was the response to the reader who wuestioned the autheticity of the reportage–“we’ve got photos, but we’re not gonna show youuuu!” Priceless.
“questioned”
sorry
Enema-tizes the We-shat-on’
Hail Eris! All Hail Discordia! Kallisti!
Strange, how there is never any photographic evidence of these alleged flag-burning incidents which seem to occur with some regularity at anti-war protests.
I mean, these lying morons could take one photo and then just recycle it whenever there’s a demonstration, right? Hell, they could just stage their own flag-burning in their back garden, photograph it, and say the Dirty Fucking Hippies did it at the protest.
Conservatives are teh stoopid. They don’t even appear to be good at the basics of criminal and fraudulent activity. Sure, they attempt it all the time, but they always manage to fuck it up, somehow. How hard would it be to fabricate a burning flag incident, ferchrissakes?
Also, being unlike the conservatives with their scatological fetishes, I have no opinion on the alleged defecation. Although, Ginger Yellow brings up an excellent point on the technical aspects of the alleged act.
I think an excellent way to test for the ‘modern conservative disease’ would involve finding out if someone had basic fucking common sense.
Being a Malkin fanboy would seem to preclude having basic fucking common sense.
Draw your own conclusions.
Man, that is some deeply shitty citizen journalism right there. I mean, this crap really stinks. It’s like the turd world over there or something…
mikey
Why were my posts on this removed?
Nevermind, most likely caught in teh server switch limbo.
More about this at . Malkin’s conclusion (“A few fringe actors? NAHHHT”) is, shockingly, not shared by the Portland P.D. or the (conservative) Portland Tribune.
I guess my other comments also reside in former Sadly, No! hell, owlbear.
But I do want to link to TPM on this.
According to police spokeswoman Officer Cathe Kent, the confrontation began when a splinter group at the end of the march tried to pull a bicycle patrol officer into their group…
“This was a splinter group. It was not the group we negotiated with for weeks before the march. Those people had a peaceful march and went home,” said Kent.
Also, note the LGF troll, and the Michelle Malkin troll (commenting as Michelle), in the comments.
Ah crap- another mangled post.
So would ann coulter call the burners/shitters “Flagots”?
mikey
I can’t believe that Sadly No isn’t denouncing this. No, wait. I can.
They probably burn flags just to keep warm.
Psycheout are you demanding the worship of graven images?
owlbear1, I am asking, nicely, that people not set fire to an poop on the flag. I am shocked that this is even a subject for debate.
I’ll admit that the title is very funny, but I don’t understand why Sadly No chose not to denounce this disgusting display performed in front of women and children.
Have you seen the video of Portland protesters burning a flag and a soldier in effigy while they ghoulishly chanted? Can you defend that? Would you even want to?
[…] 7.1: Far-left “comedy” website chortles in Wait, We Didn’t Order The Poo Poo Blather. Sadly […]
They probably burn flags just to keep warm.
That is totally uncalled for, Psycheout.
We burn crystal meth and welfare check stubs to keep warm. Flags are only torched for special occasions, like to celebrate an abortion or when we convert someone to gayness.
My mistake, HTML. Thanks for clearing that up. It was just a guess after all.
“They probably burn flags just to keep warm.”
Who spilled the cat about our alternative energy plan? Goddammit. That was supposed to be a secret until AFTER we turned over the Federal government to the U.N.
“disgusting display performed in front of women and children.”
Would it have been better if there were no woman and children present?
And why do woman need to be shielded from anything? Would it harm their frail sensibilities and hinder their ability to birth children?
“Can you defend that? Would you even want to?”
Who’s defending it? Beyond which, why shouldn’t it be defended? They’re burning a US army guy in effigy. Okay. So they’re wackos trying to start shit, but so what? It doesn’t hurt anything, anyone, nor cause any public money to be lost. If they want to hate the military, they’re free to do it. You wanna annoy them? Say that, then don’t give them any press.
There will always be an element of “dumbfucks trying to out-shock everyone else” at any large gathering of people, particularly at emotionally-charged events. Issue is taken, however, when certain people try to cast that small group of shit-starters as the default for the entire group. Trying to paint the entire anti-war movement (which is the majority of the nation, btw) as effigy burning loons is an dishonest as trying to paint the entire Christian Right as closet KKK members who want to vandalize the homes of jews and blacks with swastikas and racial slurs.
Incidentally, I skimmed both the article and the low impact site, and didn’t see anything about “not wiping the 2 year old”. Maybe I just didn’t see it.
Also, things can be printed on things other then wood pulp, Michelle.
Enema-tizes the We-shat-on
Hee hee. But until there is photographic evidence, all of this is no better than e-scatological speculation.
Watched the vid. I completely defend the burning of the American flag. In fact, I would rather have a million symbolic flags burned right now than suffer under one more minute of the Bush administration’s actual gutting of the Constitution.
As for the burning of the GI in effigy, not easy to defend–unless they were implying that going to Iraq was a waste of one’s youthful life. Harsh, cruel, childish–but it does have a bit of truthtelling in it.
Not what I would ever do in protest, but I’m not them.
Still have yet to see evidence of the shitting.
This disgusting act actually elicited cheers from some members of the crowd, but we hope that the emotion it produces in the community is one of revulsion…
There’s something funny about this sentence, ain’t there? Witnessing such an act WOULD produce ‘revulsion in the community.’ Does that even need stating? Her ‘I hope,’ then, seems oddly inappropriate.
I think it’s a sort of Freudian slip. As in, part of her brain knows she’s not fooling anyone with this made-up shit, not even the idiots who follow her. She overrules said brain part and prints this trash anyway, but the ‘I hope’ betrays her anxiety that she’s not getting away with it.
Would it have been better if there were no woman and children present?
I think it would be terrible if women had witnessed this disgusting act. Because if there’s anything women who care for young children are unused to, it’s cleaning up shit.
Oh, wait.
I can’t , can’t link to Michelle. But what the fuck does the family in Manhattan not wiping their 2 year old have to do with a fictional shitting on the flag in Portland?
And BTW, there are a lot of people in the world who don’t wipe their ass with paper, and their hygeine is a lot better than ours….
Uncle Mike, you sure are cutting these punks a lot of slack there. Did you hear what they were chanting?
�Build a bone fire. Build a bone fire. Put the soldiers on the top. Put the Fascists in the middle and we’ll burn the F’in lot�
“Bye, bye GI. In Iraq you’re gonna die�
It didn’t sound like “they were implying that going to Iraq was a waste of one’s youthful life.” It sounded like they were celebrating the death of American soldiers. It’s hard to read that any other way.
You don’t burn an effigy to say “gee, what a waste of our soldiers.” You construct an effigy and destroy it in fire to symbolize your hate of the object in question.
It seems pretty cut and dried to me. And literally crapping on a burning flag? Words fail me.
but I don’t understand why Sadly No chose not to denounce this disgusting display performed in front of women and children.
Because:
1. We are not convinced it ever happened.
2. If it did, it’s a really stupid, rude display but not illegal or even really immoral.
3. We are more interested in how wiggity wack the very idea makes certain conservatives act.
That’s why moron.
Shorter Qetesh, for those who don’t want to read the purple prose:
1) There’s fuck-all proof that this even happened;
2) The crap and the burning add extra un-credence;
3) Even if it did happen, you can’t blame the actions of one incontinent man on the majority, simply because he did it near their anti-war protest.
Carry on.
I think it would be terrible if women had witnessed this disgusting act. Because if there’s anything women who care for young children are unused to, it’s cleaning up shit.
Oh, wait.
Yuh-xactly. And of course women don’t shit themselves, so it’s quite a shock for them to see someone do it: “Ohmigod, so that‘s what they meant?!?
�Build a bone fire. Build a bone fire. Put the soldiers on the top. Put the Fascists in the middle and we’ll burn the F’in lot�
That’s bonfire, not bone fire. And when I, as a wee lassie at school, used to sing this with my chums, we put the teachers on the top, and the headmaster in the middle. It has an ancient provenance, you see. I don’t imagine that any of us actually wanted to toast teachers (except a couple of my more ‘free-range’ friends, maybe).
“Bye, bye GI. In Iraq you’re gonna die�
Don’t know the tune, so it’s hard for me to say from whence it comes.
It didn’t sound like “they were implying that going to Iraq was a waste of one’s youthful life.� It sounded like they were celebrating the death of American soldiers. It’s hard to read that any other way.
You don’t burn an effigy to say “gee, what a waste of our soldiers.� You construct an effigy and destroy it in fire to symbolize your hate of the object in question.
And, y’know, doesn’t it strike even you as faintly odd, just a smidgeon out of whack, that bearded hippy peaceniks who march and chant and wave placards to stop a war would have so much violence and hate? Doesn’t one normally find the violent, hate-filled ones in favour of war? We bearded hippy peaceniks chant foolish slogans about everyone being some mother’s son, and bemoan the tragic waste of human life, and generally showing our soft and fuzzy side, so who’s doin’ the hating? Tain’t us, kiddo.
Let me ask you this: when you were a kid, and someone did something in class but wouldn’t own up, and the teacher kept you all in after school, was that fair? Everyone being punished for the actions of one kid? I’d say no, it’s not fair. So would the rest of my peacenik buddies. Do the crime, do the time, fine, but don’t apply the time to them, their families, all the people in their street, and everyone wearing jeans.
Can you see what I’m getting at? I’ll give you some time to think about it.
It seems pretty cut and dried to me.
That’s probably because you’re an ignoramus.
And literally crapping on a burning flag? Words fail me.
I imagine they failed the dude who lowered his delicate rectal area over a burning piece of cloth. Hence the ‘singeing hair’ comment in the first post, WHICH NO-ONE SEEMS TO HAVE NOTICED, I DON’T KNOW WHY I BOTHER, I’LL BE IN THE LOUNGE WITH MY VODKA IF YOU NEED ME.
Here’s a tip: are there photographs? Hmmm. No pics, even though there were undoubtedly thousands of cameras there, with all the proud defenders of sacred stuff taking pics of themselves. Hmmm. Likely?
What happened then? Given the huge turnout of sacred-stuff-defenders, did they all really stand around watching this theoretical guy drop his pants, lower his arse, and proceed to crap on their holy, sacred, defend-at-all-costs, flag? Some of those guys are mean, I mean, mean. If any single one of them had seen such a flag-defiling, don’t you think he’d had shouted in horror and attacked? And the shout drawing the attention of others, who drew others, and so on? Man, they guy would be compressed like cheese slices within a second and a half, with about fifty stauch flag-defenders piled on him trying to remove his teeth.
And why, oh why, oh why, crap on a burning flag? Why not just one or the other? Why risk his sensitive ring area to crap on a burning flag? Would you do it? Man, the guy’s gotta be sitting at home, a cold compress clutched to his red arsehole, shrieking that he’s giving up politics for good.
No, psycheout, I really think this was made up by someone trying to give the hippy peaceniks a bad name. Don’t you?
Wow, I’m a moron now. That really hurt me to my soul. So if performing vivisection on an infant made conservatives (and other rational human beings) act “wiggity wack” you’d be “interested?”
You’ve got a very flawed moral compass, my friend.
If it did happen it doesn’t sicken you? It doesn’t make you disappointed in your fellow American who participated in such a disgusting spectacle?
If so…wow. Don’t you believe that anything is worthy of respect? Sadly not, I suppose.
Very funny, Qetesh the Abyssinian. It was worthwhile stopping by just to extract that eloquent essay from you. Well done! 😀
But I don’t think there’s very many flag defenders in Portland, Oregon. So your scenario, while funny, would have to be completely fictional. You saw the video of the burning flag and burning soldier effigy, did you not? There were no counter-protests. Everybody seemed to be gawking and enjoying the disgusting show.
How about South Korean cinema though? The Quiet Family — quite a flick, eh? 😉
Oh boy, this game never gets old.
I guess we should ask conservatives to apologize or make a statement whenever a terrorist kills people. You see, because the terrorists are the “conservatives” in the Middle East. Wouldn’t that be fun?
[…] Bring on the ID Card! Abortions for everyone! Child sacrifice! Buying vodka with food stamps! Hell, let’s shit on Ol’ Glory! Take it away, Eddie!!! WPvideo […]
Psycheout, you’re just not gettin’ it. The shitting on a burning flag thing, it never happened. Asking people to apologize for a non-event is absurd.
If it had happened, we’d be seeing photos 24/7. Do you think La Malkin would let an opportunity like that pass her by? LGF? The Rottweiler bunch? No photos to see. No event to take photos of.
As long as your in the mood for collective guilt, are you going to apologize for the Rev. Fred Phelps or for Ann Coulter?
Yeah, I didn’t think so.
So you don’t believe the press? I guess the Portland Tribune just lied to make the anti-troop movement look bad? I suppose you think 9/11 was just another inside job as well. Heh.
And Fred Phelps is a Democrat, Doc. He’s yours, not mine. He was an al-Gore supporter.
Psycheout, please notice in what section of the newspaper that story you linked to resides.
Now, please take a moment to look the word “opinion” up in the dictionary. We’ll wait while you do this.
Little secret here…..the usual factchecking standards of journalism do not apply on the opinion pages. So it is not possible to place any degree of certainty on anything stated therein.
It’s amazing how often the things we think are certain to be true turn out to be unsubstantiated rumor.
Hey, I condemmed shitting in public several posts ago! Also, I hate when people spit in public. I don’t want to see your loogies, people.
I heard about some conservatives raping unicorns. Is Psycheout going to come out against unicorn rape?
Absolutely. I condemn this practice in the strongest possible terms.
More to the point, Psycheout, why are two admitted unicorn-rapers among the Republican frontrunners if conservatives do not support this practice?
Hey, psycheout, let’s see YOU try the Malkin challenge, in the privacy of your home:
1) Set a flag on fire (use a North Korean or Cuban one)
2) Take a dump on it
3) Then write back and talk about the experience- ie, was it even possible for you to do?
I don’t burn flags. It’s stupid and serves no purpose.
I refuse to take the flaming flag poo poo challenge.
And RZ, I cannot explain why Giuliani and Romney are the frontrunners. Perhaps if the media would explain their past attacks on innocent unicorns the tide would turn.
The ‘ACT’ was performed after the main protestors had already left. A dozen or so ‘anarchist punks’ having absolutely nothing to do with that actual march.
If Republicans start calling on all whites in America to soundly repudiate every white supermacists’ rally or every German in America to soundly repuditate ‘neo-nazis rallies’ then you might have a point.
Hasn’t happened in the past don’t see it happening in the future.
Psycheout, why haven’t conservatives come out against how Michelle Malkin and Ann Coulter ganged up on The Statue of Liberty and beat her up? I heard all about it. The Statue of Liberty was just walking down the street and Michelle Malkin and Coulter were coming the other way. And they were like, “Get out of our way bitch!”. And The Statue of Liberty was like, “Who the hell are you?”
And then Ann Coulter said, “Bitch, we own this town so get out of our way!”. And The Statue of Liberty was like, “I don’t know you.” So then Michelle Malkin whipped out her knife and tried to stab The Statue of Liberty. But The Statue of Liberty was too quick for her- grabbed her hand and Malkin couldn’t twist out of The Statue’s grasp. But at the same time, Ann Coulter grabbed The Statue’s hair and pulled really hard- pulled some of it out. The Statue was overcome by the pain, and so let go of Malkin’s knife.
Then Malkin dropped the knife and kicked The Statue of Liberty in the gut. The Statue of Liberty doubled over. Coulter jumped on The Statue’s back, but The Statue jerked herself forward and Coulter just fell off, knocking her head on the pavement. But while that was going on, Malkin put on her brass knuckles and hit The Statue on the side of her head. The Statue was knocked whoozy by that. Malkin kept hitting her with the brass knuckles while she was reeling from the pain. The Statue fell on the ground.
Malkin kept hitting The Statue about the neck and face. Coulter got up finally and kicked her a few times. Then they said something like, “That’s right bitch! Don’t fuck with the NeoCon Sisters!”. The Statue isn’t sure because she was half-unconscious. They left the Statue like that. The Statue of Liberty had to go to the hospital, and she lost two teeth, and her entire neck and face was bruised black, and she had two black eyes and a swollen ear! She’s afraid to go out in public now!
I haven’t heard any conservatives speak out about the way that Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin beat up The Statue of Liberty- beat her about the neck and face! So what gives? You don’t care about assault and battery? Against one of our national monuments?!? You have a very flawed moral compass, Psycheout, if you don’t care about an innocent statue getting beat within an inch of her life!
I mean, what is The Statue of Liberty supposed to do? Should she go out again? But what if Coulter and Malkin get her again? She won’t tell her family who did it to her. (But her brother knows, he’s trying to get her to tell so he can sue. But the case may not stand up in court because The Statue has no witnesses.)
And where are the defenders of our national monuments, I ask, when The Statue of Liberty was getting her clock cleaned by Michelle Malkin and Ann Coulter? Don’t they care about an innocent national monument who was only trying to mind her own business?
Now that the photo has emerged, I guess you doubters will acknowledge it.
[crickets]
I guess you doubters will acknowledge it.
1. We are not convinced it ever happened.
2. If it did, it’s a really stupid, rude display but not illegal or even really immoral.
3. We are more interested in how wiggity wack the very idea makes certain conservatives act.
That’s why moron.
OK. Now refer to point #2.
Look, a person doing something crude and not-patriotic in public! If we don’t all repudiate it, we’re as bad as them! So what? You want to assign collective guilt to us for a guy pinching a loaf on a burning symbol? You get to take the collective guilt for supporting an incompetent bumbler and his war of aggression that’s killed hundreds of thousands of Iraqi civilians, and thousands of American solders. You may now kiss all of my ass.
[…] at the peak of my buzz and the top of my lungs, a fatwa against America and apple pie. Then I poop on the flag. But the fact of the matter is, your mileage may […]
And just because an idiot disgraces himself, should those of us who weren’t within a thousand miles apologize? And just for the sake of exemplifying class, tact and decorum, note that the very fine patriots who provided the lovely portrait of doofus, dumpling and flag advocate the murder of not only the pooper but all those i his vicinity. And when it comes to excretory mischief, I’m sure that psycheout will be happy to apologize for the graphic on the same page of an individual urinating on a sacred text. Because irony isn’t dead in conservative America, it’s just badly wounded and lying in a ditch.