Privatize; They’re Watching You

As you might’ve read last week, while I was working doubles and helping some friends have a party time at their wedding, some of the deplorable conditions at Walter Reed Hospital were likely caused by a politically motivated push to privatize maintence services and shower tax dollars on a well-connected company:

IAP is owned by Cerberus Capital Management LP, an asset-management firm chaired by former Treasury secretary John W. Snow. The company is headed by two former high-ranking executives of KBR, [a Halliburton subsidiary]. Al Neffgen, IAP’s chief executive, was chief operating officer for a KBR division before joining IAP in 2004. IAP’s president, Dave Swindle, is a former KBR vice president.

That paragraph pretty much sums up everything wrong about the last six years: A bunch of people’s lives got worse because the Bush adminstration wanted to make some of their rich friends even richer. And it’s not like the nation’s journalists have suddenly become better, more succinct writers; you see paragraphs like that all the time. (The one about shipping cash by the ton to Iraq might be the definitive example of the genre.) That’s probably why The Left gets so frustrated that he begins to exhibit the symptoms of Bush Derangement Syndrome. It’s maddening when someone refuses to see a problem that’s so readily apparent and easily explained, and it’s even more irritating when people get mad at you for pointing out those obvious mistakes.

It’s sort of like when you see a stranger walking down the street with her skirt tucked into the back of her pantyhose or a long strip of toilet paper trailing from the bottom of his shoe, and you sidle up to them and let them know, but they get embarrassed and yell at you as if you’ve played some sort of dirty trick on them.

All you can do is shake your head as they walk away, looking ridiculous, and say to yourself, “I was only trying to help.” And, if you’re anything like me, you’re calling your friend when you get back to work and saying, “You’ll never believe what this douchebag said to me at lunch…”

 

Comments: 15

 
 
 

Psst. Travis. You have spinach in your teeth.

 
 

Shut up, dick!

 
 

As a reality-based person, I prefer that someone point out the problem, so I can attend to it. But maybe Jesus tells the non-reality-based people when they have toilet paper on their shoes, with that still, quiet voice in the heart.

Or maybe not.

Seriously, the whole privatization thing is such a fraud. Everything the Repugnants manage to privatize turns to shit.

 
 

I don’t get mad, I get even by cementing an unbreakable alliance against Western civilization with foreign theocrats for some weird reason.

 
 

Yeah. What is it about Halliburton? Have they NEVER hired anyone who could find their ass with both hands and a flashlight? Everybody that’s ever worked there seems to be a venal, mendacious little thug with no actual skills or acumen. It’s bad enough that they just get handed these contracts. Why can they never do the work associated with the contract without fucking it up?

mikey

 
 

i’m sorry, there is just no way that a guy named “swindle” was involved in this, or indeed that anyone with that name ever worked at KBR. although there was a SVP named Jane totalfuckingscumbag and i believe John Governmentteatsucker was in HR over there.

 
 

Privatization is the problem not the solution…

 
 

Oops. Did I say “teeth”? I meant servers.

 
 

“IAP’s president, Dave Swindle, is a former KBR vice president”

Man, Dave’s name is priceless. I wonder why they didn’t mention Vice Presidents Arnold Rape and Phil Pillage?

 
 

IAP’s president, Dave Swindle, is a former KBR vice president.

OMG, OMFucking GOD. How much more transparent can you get?! I suppose he is formerly of the law firm Duey, Cheetam & Howe?

Wow…..just, y’know, wow.

 
 

Why can they never do the work associated with the contract without fucking it up?

And why can we do nothing about it? Seems to me there should be some criminal activity going on here. Some violation of the RICO statute or something. These people have to be stopped.

 
Flywheel, Shyster and Flywheel
 

Miss Dimple: Law offices of Beagle, Shyster, and Beagle . . . I can’t talk now. My boss, Mr. Beagle, just came in. Good morning, Mr. Beagle.

Groucho: Good morning? What’s good about it? The rain is coming through the roof, the landlord’s coming through the door, my wife goes through my pockets, and I’m going through my shoes. And you say it’s a good morning. Miss Dimple, you were late again this morning. Where were you last night?

Miss Dimple: Last night? Why, I was out with you.

Groucho: Out with me, eh? Miss Dimple, it isn’t a good policy to mix business with pleasure. . . .

Miss Dimple: But you asked me to go out.

Groucho: Yes, but you didn’t have to go out on the second drink, Miss Dimple! . . . What’s on the court calendar for this afternoon?

Miss Dimple: You know you have a suit on today.

Groucho: Certainly I have a suit on today. Do you expect me to come in in my nightshirt? I only wear that for night court.

 
 

“Support the Troops, send them a tube of KY…they’re going to need it.”

 
Qetesh the Shaved Abyssinian
 

Yeah. What is it about Halliburton? Have they NEVER hired anyone who could find their ass with both hands and a flashlight?

It’s in the employment interview, mikey.

 
 

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