Hootenanny? Here’s To Noonan!

Since we’re trading schticks like The Replacements traded instruments on that one song, let’s see what’s going on tonight over at Blogs For Bush:

Some people are just determined to make fools of themselves.

Hey, now this sounds promising. Hang on a sec’ while I crack open that other bottle of Stone’s IPA and — Dang. It’s just this thing from CNET News.com about Dan Rather being interviewed at SXSW by Jane Hamsher (which is spelled “Hampshire” in subsequent refs, strangely enough) and … well, let’s roll that beautiful bean footage:

What journalism actually needs is an honesty implant [Ed. Note: Zing!] – so wrapped up in careerism and deathly afraid of offending liberal pieties, journalism has become dishonest; not so much unwilling to tell the truth, but afraid to. The whole system has made it much easier to lie than to tell the truth.

The system has made it? Made what? Much easier? Much easier to what? Lie to whom? What for? When did this … ? But why? And how!

Think about it – how hard is it to get, say, an article calling our troops criminals printed compared with how hard it is to get an article printed calling our troops heros?

Aw hell, Mark. I dunno. I’m too tired to think. Most of the articles I write are about traffic accidents and sex offenders, if they aren’t restaurant reviews, so why don’t you —

Much easier, even if you aren’t anti-American or unpatriotic, to just go with the flow, churn out the articles your editor wants and slowly rise through the journalistic ranks…with the talk show or the best selling book at the pinnacle of success.

Slowly rise? I’ve been slowly rising, if you wanna call it that, for the last 15 years, and I still don’t have a book deal. Under what pseudonym are you writing seditious articles, Mark? And can you put in a good word for me with your editor?

 

Comments: 32

 
 
 

Travis, I think Mr. Noonan could write a totally awesome book about his experiences in Iraq. Of course, Mr. Noonan would have to get his self deployed there, but I have to think a patriot like Mr. Noonan has already gotten his situamentation well in hand.

 
 

Most of the articles I write are about traffic accidents

You should be writing about the guys who DON’T CRASH, asshole.

 
 

Stone IPA is an excellent choice for wading through this mindless dreck, but personally I prefer Bridgeport IPA. I feel deprived back living in the vast beer wasteland of northern MN – There are a few good ones here, but I miss the variety of the west. Have one for us poor deprived souls in the land of Pabst.

 
 

I feel deprived back living in the vast beer wasteland of northern MN

I hope the Hamm’s bear invades ur house, killz ur leaders, and Christianizes ur ppl!!!

 
 

Some people are just determined to make themselves look like Eddie Munster.

 
 

Oh, and Mt. Shasta Brewing Co. RUL3Z!!1!!1@!

KTHXBAI

 
 

Hamms the beer refreshing, Hamms the beer refreshing, Hammmms!

 
 

I live within walking distance of a liquor store the size of a generous grocery, which is wonderful. That way, the savvy shopper can space out who rings up his order so they only think he buys a case of wine and three six packs of beer every other week. Plus, the selection is truly excellent.

PS-You rule, Righteous Bubba.

 
 

Travis, don’t be a wuss. Who cares if they know how much you drink? The important thing is that you don’t cuss. Because then you’ll never get a weekly op-ed column or a spot on a Presidential campaign.

 
 

Travis, I have to drive 40 miles to get something better than 3.2, and the selection is less than an Arizona gas station. At least there is Summit.

 
 

Wow, I’d hate to live in either of these counrtries-
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/nation/4632691.html
http://www.economist.com/displayStory.cfm?story_id=8680941
That’s gotta suck being held in prison without legal representation until you confess to whatever it is they want you to confess to.

 
 

Check out this gem:

U.S. Military Deaths Plummet [Jonah Goldberg]

UPDATE: These numbers are apparently wrong.

hi-larious.

http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=MjEzZTZjNTk1ODcwYTZiNjZkYjg4ZjhjODEwMTc1Njg=

 
the former poster
 

Travis G. said,
March 15, 2007 at 7:11

I live within walking distance of a liquor store the size of a generous grocery, which is wonderful. That way, the savvy shopper can space out who rings up his order so they only think he buys a case of wine and three six packs of beer every other week. Plus, the selection is truly excellent.

That sounds swell. I live one block away from a beer vending machine, but its not something i usually brag about (okay I do) and a block away from 3 convienience stores that sell a wide variety of beers, and two blocks away from grocery stores offering a wide variety of beers and wines and liquors, and like you I rotate thru them so as not to appear a total drunk, but seriously –you know why people like you hate america? Its because you are weak. You know you’d rather obsess about Marky Mark’s underpants or Anna Nicole’s buxom funeral or why Simon Cowell hates Seattle than rise up and throw out the mutant evil that is your government. You hate yourself for your inability. The world is staring, jaws agape, at your folly.
But at least you got a blog, right on dude! Stick it to the man!

wait, where was i, sorry had to run out for more beer…. i was in the middle of a rant… oh.. lets see…

You boneheads still haven’t started impeachment proceedings. Whatthefuck is wrong with you people? You’re all like, ‘Oh this Gonzales thing will really wake every one up, its like iran/contra, it will destroy the right wing”. Morons. Nobody in america gives a shit. You are all morons. There’s a recession coming, your infastructure is crumbling, you got no savings, you got no health care, but check it, Brittney shaved her head.

Morons.

 
 

It’s Mal de Mer!

 
dalton periphery
 

to get back to the topic of the ineffable Noonan; this really looks like some sort of neurological disorder, this way of seeing, instead of reality, an exactly-reversed mirror image of reality. A main-stream-media consensus so
rigid that dissenting voices are just whispers? Check. Dishonest journalism
afraid to tell the truth? Check. Careerism instead of integrity? Check and mate. But instead of noticing that this is all in service of the far hard right, he sees the opposite. Years and years of RNC talking points presented as the conventional wisdom, of right-wing extremists lauded and everyone from conservative Democrats (B.Clinton) to Chomsky demonized as traitors; all seen backwards.
Paging Doctor Oliver Sacks- Doctor Sacks please report to Emergency Room immediately.

 
 

I also go to different stores to buy beer. I don’t know why I give a fuck what strangers think, but I guess I do. Fuck it, from now on I’m buying my beer at the same store all of the time.
And to answer mal de mer’s question, Sadly, No hasn’t started impeachment proceedings because they don’t have that power, you stupid motherfucker.

 
 

I do buy my smoke from the same source twice a week.

 
 

The ineffable Noonan?

I’m sure not gonna eff him.

 
Qetesh the Shaved Abyssinian
 

Doc, he’s probably never been effed, and is never likely to be effed. That’s what makes him such a total dickhead.

In Japan, they have alcohol in all the supermarkets, and beer vending machines all over the place. Those Japanese have their priorities straight.

 
 

Is this Peggy’s little brother?

 
 

I’m getting a serious case of deja vue.

 
Qetesh the Shaved Abyssinian
 

Much easier, even if you aren’t anti-American or unpatriotic

I love this sentence. Extra emphasis on the ‘even’: “EVEN if you’re aren’t a godless commie, turr’rst-lovin’, free gay sex and all the abortions you can have, hating hater of righteous Murr’ka” you can still get articles published, apparently.

Handy thing to know. I hear my next career calling.

 
 

You know you’d rather obsess about Marky Mark’s underpants

The former poster, you sweet, sweet soul, you clicked on my link!

 
 

I do buy my smoke from the same source twice a week.

See now, an 1/8th used to last me a month. That’s why I couldn’t keep a regular pusher-man. I ended up just quitting altogether.

 
 

“You boneheads still haven’t started impeachment proceedings. Whatthefuck is wrong with you people? You’re all like, ‘Oh this Gonzales thing will really wake every one up, its like iran/contra, it will destroy the right wingâ€?. Morons. Nobody in america gives a shit. You are all morons. There’s a recession coming, your infastructure is crumbling, you got no savings, you got no health care, but check it, Brittney shaved her head.”

You forgot she also isn’t wearing any panties…WOOT!

 
 

Neither am I!!!

mikey

 
Herr Doktor Bimler
 

You need to shave your head as well, Mikey. Then the paparazzi might take interest.

 
 

Travis, you just earned a special place in my internet heart for bringing up the Mats back when they were on Twin/Tone.

 
Qetesh the Shaved Abyssinian
 

You know you’d rather obsess about Marky Mark’s underpants or Anna Nicole’s buxom funeral

A buxom funeral? The coffin had huge breasts, inadequately restrained by a tight-fitting frock?

You need to shave your head as well, Mikey. Then the paparazzi might take interest.

Hmmm, Image forms, of a shaven-headed vet, attitude akimbo, criticising the government while wearing no panties. The paparazzi, Doktor? Or other professionals, who travel in teams and shout ‘Hut!’ a lot?

 
 

Stone IPA rocks! Bridgeport is better? Sadly, no!

Did I ever mention I’m related to the chief Stoner?

 
Herr Doktor Bimler
 

Image forms, of a shaven-headed vet, attitude akimbo, criticising the government while wearing no panties.
And straightaway we have the central plot-line of Taxidriver II.

 
 

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