We Were Hoping For April 1st
Someone must have dropped a hat or said ‘boo’ somewhere, because there’s something silly going on over at Blogs For Bush.
Final Round
by Matt Margolis :: February 5, 2007 1:40 PMIt has been a busy couple of months, let me tell you.
Gee, hoss, try being us sometime. As soon as you catch you guys saying one crazy thing, you’ll already be noticing you guys saying some even crazier thing. The liquor budget has nearly tripled around here, and we’re slowly creeping downscale to, like, gallon jugs of Popov.
Sorry; I totally interrupted the narrative.
Above: Teh fear is palpable
In regard to the long-awaited book by Messrs. Noonan and Margolis of the Blogs For Bush empire, it appears as though our suspicions about fact checking were not necessarily unwarranted.
As I previously blogged, we submitted the manuscript to World Ahead Publishing back on November 12, 2006.
Since then, it’s gone through a number of editorial reviews, a legal review, and most recently a high level review.
And it is now five pages long.
Oh wait, we forgot: World Ahead is a wingnut-welfare publishing house founded by two crazed Silicon Valley millionaires, best known for crackpot Clinton ‘exposes’ and for the ‘Help! Mom!’ series of anti-liberal children’s books. However, it’s not all fun and games. They also publish serious, hard-hitting political titles such as this one:
Mark and I made final revisions to it this past weekend (with some new content, as the Democrats never fail to provide us with new fodder), and sent it back to World Ahead Publishing this morning. After one final proof this week, the book goes off to the printer.
That’s what you’d call a homonym, like with the words ‘but’ and ‘butt.’ When Matt uses the word, ‘proof,’ he generally means ‘an argument clothed in the trappings of rationality which is, in fact, intended to create fog and befuddlement.’ This time he seems to mean a version of the book. Then again, this new content seems likely to include the Nancy Pelosi ‘Tunagate’ scandal — which… Okay, here’s what we said in our aformentioned report of November 27th:
Guys, just as an FYI, there are many ways to source material, although the following generally doesn’t wash: “Oh yeah, it’s totally true about Pelosi and the seven Iranian trapeze artists. Just check Wikipedia. …Uh, give me 15 minutes.�
Oddly enough, the Tunagate story was completely fabricated by some mysterious person who altered a couple of Wikipedia entries in order to invent ‘a source’ for the allegations. Here’s Mark again:
The expected publication date is now the first week of March.
So I guess things are all straightened out now, with the proofs and the Tuna and the edits and the legal and all that.
Except oops, maybe not.
We’ve also recently hired a publicist, so there will be lots of exciting updates in the weeks to come. Meanwhile, please sign up for our mailing list!
We keep trying, guys, but somehow we never seem to get added to the list!
What the hell kind of whiney ass “Help! Mom, Barack Hussein Obama Madrassah is under my bed” shit is this? Get your ass out on the streetcorner and start selling matches, like a good conservative.
Honestly, I’m sort of excited for this book. But not in the way dingbats Margolis and Noonan want people to be excited. I just haven’t read anything really funny since America: The Book, and this one promises to be a gutbuster.
By the way, who wants to bet that the “editorial review” was an editor saying, “Can’t you make up some more stuff about HIllary? Our audience loves that shit.” and the “legal review” was some lawyer saying, “Well, OK, this is a bunch of bullshit with grade-school critical thinking applied to it, but I think you guys are sliding in just under the threshold of libel lawsuits.” (The “high level review,” of course, meaning Noonan talked to God about it, and God told him, “Blessed art thou who will get those damn dirty Defeat-o-crats!”)
Still, wouldn’t you have pity on the poor soul who got hired to be the publicist for these two carbon blobs? Having to earn your lucre by trying to get them booked on anything above a third-rate Sean Hannity-impersonator’s show? Ugh.
“Help! Mom! Liberals want me to join the troops!”
I am surprised they found a publisher who would accept a manuscript written in crayon.
“Thank You President Bush” – Reflections on the 2008 elections by all eleven Republican Senators.
Ya know, Brits call marijuana “bush”, so maybe we can call “Blobs for Bush” a bunch of foreign hippie pot smokers.
Foreign, I say! With foreign accents! Eeeek!! Run!!
I just love Matt. His local politics blog, hubpolitics.com, is full of such insightful analysis as, “There’s no excuse for that.” and “This situation is something they should have been better prepared for, but unfortunately, they’ve handled it terribly.”
When I’m upset I have insomnia, I always read it for the unique combination of boring and absurdly stupid which it, amongst all the blogs in the blogosphere, seems to possess. I can’t help it.
I’ll miss him if he actually makes it big… er…. makes money off the book and leaves the local blog. Sigh.
gallon jugs of Popov.
Charcoal-filtered!!
Thanks for that one Sporty. My IQ just dropped 20 points. One point for each second I looked at hubpolitics. As a former MA Republican (I said former) I thought it might be interesting to see what was going on in the Party. Boy, was I wrong. Are Matt and Aaron brothers or gay married? Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
I can’t wait to read the Generals review on Amazon.
Honestly, I’m thinking about trying as a Senior project to start a rumor about whoever it appears is going to be a Republican frontrunner (I really can’t think a better way to examine the media dynamics in America), I mean how hard could it be to get a couple of disgraced IOC members to accuse Romney of gross corruption? (See, I already know this book is going to be a collection of half-truths and complete fabrications which its nature will light the kindling and thus precipitate the firestorm).
The wingnut welfare gravy train never ceases to amaze. These guys would captain the Titanic straight into an iceberg and then use their homespun disaster to assert global warming is a liberal fraud.
I totally agree, Sporty. Hub Politics is full of such great analysis as, “The Republicans should find someone who can beat Kerry.” It’s what I love about both Hub Politics and B4B: whenever I’m feeling a little stupid, I head over there and can see there are some people who are a lot dumber than I am.
I would love to see someone try to out wingnut Mark Noonan. The resulting twitfight video would be the #1 youtube video for months. Rabbit punches for everyone!