Darkness At Noonan

Is he at it again? Oh God, yes, he’s at it again.

Apparently, in Mark Noonan’s world, everyone is fleeing California because the state is a socialist dystopia that gives out free money, and where property values are too high.

California Leavin’

This is what comes from long-term liberal/left policies: everyone starts to leave:

California’s population growth rate slipped for a sixth year in a row as tens of thousands of residents left for other states, according to new estimates the state released Wednesday.

Demographers said many of those who left probably were seeking a lower cost of living.[…]

Um, emphasis mine. Please note for later that it simply says ‘seeking a lower cost of living.’ A normal person would read that and think it refers to ‘the cost of living’ — i.e., rents, insurance bills, retail prices, tuition rates, and any number of other things like that.

A normal person would also see ‘growth rate slipped’ and ‘tens of thousands’ and rightly conclude that we’re talking about perhaps 0.2% of California’s 37,000,000 people — and that the population is not getting smaller, but only rising more slowly. There’s no imagining what Noonan was thinking; all we know is that he somehow lands here:

My bet on this is that those immigrants – legal and otherwise – who are staying are those attracted to California’s massive transfer payments to pretty much anyone who asks.

Ah yes, the massive on-demand transfer payments. That’s why Compton High School looks like this:

“Dahling, one doesn’t just ‘sign up’ for the polo team — one must
furnish references.”

It’s also how all those ladies selling oranges at freeway exits can afford to live at the Château Marmont, and it helps explain why San Francisco has that problem with unicorns and leprechauns.

…Okay, I know I shouldn’t ask these questions, but has Mark ever been to California, or does he even know anything at all about California — or did he just cut some lines of pure Kool Aid powder and fall gibbering into a kaleidoscope drug-spiral of Move America Forward Foundation policy papers and Michael Savage repeats, emitting this post as an unconscious cry for attention? Has he been snozzing on ye Bagge of ye olde Magick +3 Cemente of Rubber again? If you put all his punctuation marks in series, do they spell out Morse code for ‘black black losing hope call doctor help?’ I know I also shouldn’t try to answer these questions.

California is becoming France…great wine, nice scenery, completely falling apart.

We can only pray that California comes to its senses soon and puts a Republican in the governor’s office. Hopefully it won’t be too late.

But wait, there’s more:

The median price of a house in Florida is about 50% of that in California…and Florida is more densely populated than California. How to explain this?

Uh, houses are cheaper in Florida because more people want to live in them. No, houses are more expensive in California because everyone wants to live in Florida.

Oh no, he’s doing it again.

Above: Mark Noonan Logic

Ok, so high property values are now a bad thing. Good to know. Who says conservatism is hard to understand?

Coming up on Blogs For Bush: “As a conservative, I don’t have anything personal against black people or Latinos. It’s just that as soon as they move in, property values start going, uh, up. I mean down. Uh, no, wait. Property values stay the same or go up. …Well, whichever one it is, I think I speak for all conservatives when I say…”

But here’s the answer to the question above:

How to explain this?

It is the difference between a people-centered conservative government in Florida and a whacko-left centered government in California.

“Oh,” we thought. So we all chipped in and got Mark a parcel of discount Florida real estate.

Above: Merry Christmas, Mark!

Guaranteed to increase or decrease in value, or whatever real estate is supposed to do. I think there’s supposed to be a house in there: You can sometimes see a piece of siding poking out of the water.

Bradrockets adds: BWAH-HA-HA!!! Did you see this one?

Senior Taliban Killed

Another victory in the War on Terrorism… Of course, since the report is from al-Rueters (“one man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter”), they have to insert enemy propaganda in the form of a Taliban spokesman denying that the terrorist leader has been killed…given how careful the US and Coalition forces have been about making these claims in the past, I’d think that Reuters would know better than that…but, they don’t, because they are an anti-American propaganda outfit dressed up as a wire service…must have bugged all heck out of them to admit that one of their “freedom fighters” (freedom, I guess, to stone homosexuals to death) was killed.

Funny thing about that:

“Every country and every people has a stake in the Afghan resistance, for the freedom fighters of Afghanistan are defending principles of independence and freedom that form the basis of global security and stability.”

Ronald Reagan, praising the Mujahideen who would later form the Taliban

[Gavin adds: Huh. I didn’t know Ronald al-Reagan inserted enemy propaganda into his speeches. Learn something new every day.]

This is a good one too. Mark basically argues that the only reason monarchy gets a bad name is because of a few bad apple kings. He concludes that if you have a good monarch running your country (like St. Louis of France or George W. Bush), then it ain’t so bad. Really. That’s his argument.

Above: Marke Noonyne of Elecktronyck Scrolles That Lauyshe Goode Praise Pon Lorde George Bvshe Hym Sulf.


Comments: 36


I hope he didn’t steal Kaye’s rubber cement. She has a knife, you know.


Mark Noonan Logic reminds me of the monthly Real Estate advertorial section I used to have to edit at a small town paper. There was this columnist in the section who, once a month, had to somehow opine that it was both a buyer’s market … and a seller’s market! Woot!

Thing is, that columnist was just a shill and he knew it. Noonan? Not so much.


Cognitive. Dissonance.

Without it, the Noonans would implode.

Which would be a good pay-per-valview on the dollar.


No doubt about it. Things are awful in California. I’ve lift here my whole life, and the ever-present sunshine and 78 degree temperatures are downright oppressive.

Oh yeah. Unemployment in L.A. is no at 4.2% — a thirty year low. Things just couldn’t get any worse.


California’s population growth rate slipped for a sixth year

So the population of the country’s most populous state is still going up year after year after year, it’s just not going up as fast as it had previously. Tough trouble California is having, eh?

From the article: Including natural increase, the state gained an estimated 462,454 residents this year.

Just to give an idea how silly to claim that this sort of indication of the apocalypse, keep in mind that even if 500,000 new people moved to California each year, every year, California would still have a growth rate that would slip in every succeeding year. People who don’t understand math really annoy me.


Hmm, wasn’t it just a few months ago that I heard some wingnut on the radio brag that California’s ‘GDP’ had surpassed France’s, and how that was a stick in France’s surrender-monkey eye? How funny, I thought: liberal California. The wingnut radio host didn’t make the logical leap to that part, surprise surprise.

Me, I put California’s growth off to Rep. Jerry Lewis (R-Place where people get out of their car to take a piss on the right side of I-15 between LA and Vegas) and his one-man full-employment act for criminal defense lawyers. Or maybe I should call him ‘R-Zzyzx Road.’


[…] Poise! Poise! « Darkness At Noonan Dec24 […]


The median price of a house in Florida is about 50% of that in California…and Florida is more densely populated than California. How to explain this?

Well, you divide the population by the area. Since CA has about twice the population and about 3 times the area of FL, it will have a lower population density. It also helps that CA’s population is concentrated in 3 major metropolitan areas, where FL’s population is more spread out around the state; that is, FL’s population is in more, but smaller, cities.

As for the price of homes, doesn’t that pretty well indicate that lots more people WANT to live in CA than in FL? You know, free market setting prices from relationship of supply and demand? As in, greater demand for CA homes than FL homes?

Having lived in both states, I can certainly see why that would be. Better weather, way fewer nasty creepy crawly things… and fewer insects, spiders, snakes, scorpions.


You guys already use “High Noonan”? Did I miss it?


We kinda lack Teh Industry and Teh Manufacturing in Florida. I suppose if our service industries raise their minimum gratuity to 70%, we’ all become immensely wealthy like those bocialists in Cali.i


“He was at it again!”
“Let him, let him”
“But every day?!”


[…] Sadly, No! throws an offhanded dig at Mark Noonan’s description of the “Kingdom of God” as a state of existence. While Noonan eventually does come out in favor of democracy, you’ll note that it’s only because you can’t guarantee you’ll get a competent and benevolent dictator (one who only oppresses The Other) not because the idea of being ruled by fiat—being forcibly infantilized for life—is simply repugnant on it’s face. […]


1. Florida jobs don’t pay as much. The cost of living is lower, so houses are cheaper.
2. California is less crowded because it’s bigger than Montana and everybody lives along the coast.
3. Instead of typing out “Coalition forces” every time, Blogs for Bush should just use the two-letter abbreviation: “UK”.


As long as Mr. Nooner stays far away from my home state, I will be happy.


I think Marky Marke’s juxtaposition of “Florida good, California bad” and “All I wants for Xmas is a benevolent dynasty” means he’s still pimpin’ Jeb over Ahnuld in 2008. Of course, the current Bush-in-Residence has totally f*cked his brother’s chances of beating the Adams record — that’s why paterfamilia Weasel King keeps breaking into tears in public — but anyone past puberty who still believes in the divine right of (some) kings has already established his stubborn refusal to live in the real world.

When Dubya’s “Operation Enduring FUBAR” sends the U.S. economy swirling down the tank, does Noonan really believe he’ll get a (coach) seat on the last Learjet to Paraguay? Or does his own fate not matter, as long as the Lordly Rulers he views through a gauzy golden scrim are Out There somewhere, forever warring & carousing in a timeless eternity where age cannot wither nor custom educate?

More prosaically, can’t someone persuade him that, if Willard Romney’s presidential-caliber Hair doesn’t trump his “irregular� religious background, he could at least move his homopoliticerotic yearnings to Rudy Giuliani’s nominal Catholicism and heartfelt fascistic urges? Sniffing Jeb’s jock just won’t provide enough material to keep Noonan out of the Fabio Dimension for the next two years, and without at least a tenuous connection to political reality, there just won’t be much entertainment for us in mocking Ye Blogges for Thee Bushe Kynges…


Take this with a grain of salt, as I’ve lived in California all my life, but you know when life sucks, and someone tells you to be thankful for all the good things you do have? I always thanks God I live in California. And for most of my life I have lived in the shitty part of California. Horrible traffic, superficial people, high rents, high real estate costs, it’s all worth it. My trip across the country over the summer did nothing but confirm my love for California. Nice rest of the country to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there (actually, Denver was kinda cool). If nothing else, San Diego taco shops make up for all of California’s negatives. Oh, man I miss Santana’s Califonia burritos.


Aw, don’t give Mark that nice piece of swamp. That’s a perfectly lovely bit of marsh, and what the hell did the critters who live there ever do to you that you would inflict Mark on them?


“How to explain [why real estate costs less in Florida than it does in California]? It is the difference between a people-centered conservative government in Florida and a whacko-left centered government in California.”

A “people-centered” government here in Florida? Fucking hardly. Our state government has been so “people-centered” over the last eight years that, in order to get the government to actually do something for someone other than their corporate masters, we’ve had to adopt the oh-so-effective governing-by-referendum strategy.

Of course, our “people-centered” government decided that enough was enough, and backed a referendum to make it harder to pass binding statewide referenda in the future (requiring a 60% supermajority for passage, as opposed to the 50%+1 standard). Naturally, it passed, because these things usually do here. So the “people centered” government of this ridiculous state can now go back to ignoring the people.

“People-centered” government of Florida to actual people of Florida: Fuck you.


St. Louis of France

Man, he needs an atlas. St. Louis is in Missouri.


… he’s still pimpin’ Jeb over Ahnuld in 2008.

He doesn’t really have a choice — Ahnuld is an immigrant, he can’t run for Preznit.

(Yeah, I know, “lucky us”.)

I don’t know how any of y’all can have a discussion of property values in FL without using the word “hurricane” at some point. Just sayin’.


Earthquake. Nyah.


Wait–he’s saying that the price of real estate is a function of population density? What about (I know–don’t bother) the local economy? In two comparably dense areas, what if one is populated by tv and movie writers, working actors, union crew members, and industry exex, and the other by folks who work in the dog food factory and over by the string-and-twine manufacturer? Their real estate prices will be the same?

Do I HAVE to bang my head repeatedly against the refrigerator to make this guy go away? Because I’ll do it. Just say the word.


(freedom, I guess, to stone homosexuals to death)

Because stoning homosexuals to death goes against every Christian… wait, no I mean, how awful and primitive to discriminate against…Aiiiii! Hes doing it again!!


“Apparently, in Mark Noonan’s world, everyone is fleeing California because the state is a socialist dystopia that gives out free money, and where property values are too high.”

Duh… No, he’s saying that everyone who makes money is fleeing California because it is a socialist dystopia that gives out your money to others, and where property values are too high. At some point, wage earners become disgusted at supporting not only the poor and downtrodden (a noble goal), but also the lazy and also the illegal aliens.

Keep in mind that if you factored out the largely unschooled illegal population, the rate of flight would be significantly higher. California has some nice coastline, but the cost has become too high, and the exodus will continue.

Even most hippie liberal actors don’t live there anymore. Shouldn’t that throw up some red flags?


people-centered conservative government in Florida

Well, if you consider sugar corporations people.


“… he’s still pimpin’ Jeb over Ahnuld in 2008.”
He doesn’t really have a choice — Ahnuld is an immigrant, he can’t run for Preznit. (Yeah, I know, “lucky us�.)

Thlayli, I know that, and you know that, but those Reichtards who believe that governing requires a firm hand and a gutteral Germanic-sounding accent have convinced each other that a constitutional amendment eliminating the pesky native-born-only clause now impeding Ahnuld’s coronation would be a walkover. Because, when the country needs a Strong Man, surely no patriotic American would look elsewhere than at a multiple Mr. Universe who also happens to be a gen-yu-wine movie star, not to mention connected to a glamorous political family, right?

One of the many fracture lines now showing up among the Repugs is the split in the “Dynasties are So Romantic” cadre between those who believe the Bush family reputation can still be salvaged, and those who think a fresh-or-at-least-very-botoxed face with more conventional entertainment ties would be more palatable to the Entertainment Tonite demographic voters. In a sane (non-Diebold) universe, the current governor of California would probably have a better chance of winning national office than the current governor of Florida, all other factors being equal, and that’s an obvious source of irritation to His Noonaninity.


“Apparently, in Mark Noonan’s world, everyone is fleeing California because the state is a socialist dystopia that gives out free money, and where property values are too high.â€?

Duh… No, he’s saying that everyone who makes money is fleeing California because it is a socialist dystopia that gives out your money to others, and where property values are too high.


Perhaps you could post a fuller explanation on your blog.


But why, jade? My statement was all encompassing, and scarily accurate. I removed my blogsite because I didn’t want you to think I was trying to get hits or something. I’m not about that. I want to educate the hippies! All people were created equal, so hippies and environmentalists have to just be misinformed. They are as smart as regular people, but they just don’t know the facts, or understand science. I’m here to save them!

After reading my comment, you came up with the brilliant retort of ‘huh?’. I’m forced to say ‘what?’. If it’s too complicated for you to understand, perhaps you could mention what part is baffling you so your betters could explain it to you? I do enjoy educating the uninformed, but need a little more clarity on what exactly it is you can’t comprehend.




1. I guess no one’s told Noonan that in November the Democrats in Florida picked up 7 seats in the State House and 2 US House.

2. Has our dear friend Kevin returned?


Yeah, kinda. However, I’m at google now. It’s painful to watch you guys get so misled by this site, all the while vocally agreeing with the site owner. Every once in a while, I am forced to ask, “Are you guys retarded or something?” Noonan is describing exactly what is happening in California, but instead of complaining about the state of affairs, you whine about the messenger. Way to problem solve.

Merry Festivus, my liberal associates, and a happy winter solstice!


Kevin said,

December 25, 2006 at 1:43

“Apparently, in Mark Noonan’s world, everyone is fleeing California because the state is a socialist dystopia that gives out free money, and where property values are too high.�

Duh… No, he’s saying that everyone who makes money is fleeing California because it is a socialist dystopia that gives out your money to others, and where property values are too high. At some point, wage earners become disgusted at supporting not only the poor and downtrodden (a noble goal), but also the lazy and also the illegal aliens.

Kevin, you can’t possibly be a wage earner in California. Wage earners in California don’t make enough money to flee. Those who are “fleeing” California because they’re so “disgusted” at having their money “given” to the “lazy” — or in normal English, at paying taxes to support the system that validates their earnings in the first place — aren’t “wage earners”; they’re greedhead corporate types making salaries that are fifty or a hundred times more than the value of the actual work they do. They love to prate about how illegal immigrants are “ruining” the state, but all they really are is too cheap to tip the actual immigrant workers who wash their cars and mind their kids.


Fiorinda, do you know anyone personally who you consider to be rich that says they are disgusted by having to give their money to lazy poor people? Do you personally know anyone rich who you believe thinks this way? I’m betting you don’t, but would be willing to believe you if you say you do. I know a few of ’em, and they tend to be philanthropic. It’s mostly Hollywood that paints rich people as sleazy. Mostly they are good people like the rest of us (Enron scuzbags not withstanding).

As the stats show, conservatives give more of their income to the needy than liberals, so obviously it’s not a left/right issue. Conservatives like to give their money to help the poor, and liberals like to give other people’s money to help the poor. It’s almost like we agree. So there must be some other reason the middle class and rich want to flee California. What could it be?

What I’m saying is that you are being told a lie when someone tells you the middle class and wealthy are fleeing California because they don’t want to help the poor. It’s just that many thoughtful people believe that a government dole is the absolute worst of all possible options for helping the poor short of starving them to death. It consumes the poor person’s soul by robbing him of self-worth, leaving him addicted to the free money and stuck in poverty, never to emerge as a productive human being. Go cash a welfare check if you doubt what I’m saying. Hand to God, I’ve seen mothers brought to tears by this very action. Most people really want to make it on their own. No doubt you won’t believe me, since you’ve seen people cash that check with pride, right?

Anyway, let’s agree that we all want to help poor people. Can we agree that the most poorly run institution on the planet, the government (insert your country here), is not the right choice for who should be doing the helping? In America, since the 60’s and the ‘new deal’, they have only kept the poor people poor, but well fed. That’s nothing to brag about, since not many people were dying of starvation in the US in the 50’s either. Can’t we do something about making poor people not poor?

Which leads me, finally, to the point. If we keep importing an infinite number of new poor people to work for minimum wage, or less than minimum wage, the answer is ‘no’. Why would McDonald’s hire an American or an American immigrant for $15/hr when he could hire an illegal immigrant for minimum wage? Why would Bob’s Construction Company hire an American worker for $15/hr when his competitors are hiring illegals for LESS than the minimum wage? He would be bankrupt soon if he did.

And that is how illegal immigration is destroying us. Many companies don’t even have the option of hiring Americans without pricing themselves out of their markets. This leaves California with a $3/hr illegal alien workforce who need government assistance, and regular wage earners. Can you blame Americans for fleeing? Why not go to another state where people get paid a reasonable amount for their work, and we don’t have to suppliment their income? Californians are clearly saying ‘yes’ to that question. I guess only time will tell what happens when the illegal alien invasion attacks other states. My guess is that California was just a warning.


Oh, and happy ramakwanzadan to my liberal brethren.


ive lived in FL(33315), CA(92103) and now in Portland OR – and I must say that San Diego is the tops thus far tho it is too damn expensive. And most of the immigrants i knew in CA and FL worked pretty hard and at more than 1 job (which is supposed to be uniquely murkin’ according to Chimpy McFlightsuit)

FL’s economy is just too weird for my taste – all service driven (serving old people, rich people, foreign mkts, tourists) – pyramid schemes – nothing of “value” – mebbe pulp?

and Kevin there are plenty of illegals here in Oregon – the reason that they have jobs is because the Republicans like to make more profit – the only way to stop your “immigration nightmare” is through more regulations and enforcement against the lawbreaking businesses so that we dont have a race to the bottom – as well as sensible immigration. i personally dont care if I pay $5 for a quart of strawberries or $7 for a bigmac…

Kevin you seem to want a socialist answer to “our” problems – perhaps you should you read some Chomsky or some similar shit – Retardo mosdef can give you a bibliography of suggested reading if you can handle it.


“…there are plenty of illegals here in Oregon – the reason that they have jobs is because the Republicans like to make more profit…”
If only it were that simple Huge. When underpaid illegal aliens will do the job, a law abiding construction firm cannot compete against one who hires illegals for less than minimum wage. Unless you believe that all contractors are Republican (they should be, but then again all Americans should be), then you are forced to realize that this is not a left/right issue. The underclass in America is destroyed by the fact that there is a limitless supply of cheap labor coming mainly from Mexico. Stem that tide, and all poor Americans who hold jobs will benefit.

“Kevin you seem to want a socialist answer to “ourâ€? problems ”
Hugely, them’s fightin’ words. There is nothing socialist about me. I’m laissez faire in the truest sense of the words. But it doesn’t work if you have a bottomless pit of almost free labor entering the market. You can’t have assembly line workers making $35/hr in Detroit auto production facilities when people are willing to do it for $3/hr. The numbers just don’t add up, as we see by the demise of the big three. If you care about the poor working class in America, help stop illegal immigration. If you care more about the poor working class in the rest of the world, I’m not on your side. One problem at a time.

p.s. When you said “Chimpy McFlightsuit”, you forgot to add some reference to Haliburton, or even a mention of Hitler! How can you expect to be taken seriously by the left if you don’t add a McHitlerBurton to the mix? Next time, try ‘Chimpyburton McHitlerFlightsuit “Oil for blood” Bu$h’. See, the dollar sign makes everyone on the left realize that Bush doesn’t care about people, he just wants to make money! He’s only got $30 mil in the bank, and that’s $20 mil less than Pelosi or Edwards! He wants to catch up! Even Barbara Boxer is richer than him, but she cares more about poor people… I mean she SAYS she does… What more proof do you need?


[…] run out of puns like ‘High Noonan,’ ‘Noonan World Order,’ and ‘Darkness at Noonan.’ But as you can see, we just thought of another one. Let’s see what he’s up to […]


(comments are closed)