When pure blood lust leaves you high and dry quench your thirst, drink Surge.

Warning: May contain unintended consequences, human misery and endless quagmire. Surge does not guarantee to quench blood lust, an end to ethnic strife or victory. Do not drink Surge if you are pregnant, below the age of 18 or an adult. Surge is not a remedy for any long term geopolitical problem. If mindless carnage continues, consult a blue ribbon panel for advice/political cover. Surge is registered trademark of the Bush Administration. Improper use is not indicative of the failure of America or in particular of the President or of conservatism.

Operation Oedipus Tex was the best of the lot.

I always hate this part of the movie. This is the “Oh jeez, that’s a REAL bad idea, don’t do that” part. You know, like when the girl takes the flashlight and heads down to check out the noises in the basement? This slow-motion cataclysm, first the ISG, then the report, then the disregard-ment (I know, whatever) of the report, now more slowly creeping down the creaky steps until the annoucement of the final steps to disaster.

This is not the forum to discuss all the reasons why a surge is a bad idea, but let’s just skip to the denounement. When the surge is over, what then? Iraq is even bloodier and more chaotic. Large sections of Baghdad are in ruins. The Shi’a have made a temporary alliance with the Sunnis to fight the Americans, and the government has mostly moved to London. Thugs and crazies control the oil in the south, and the PKK is getting noisier up north, to nobody’s advantage. What will president asshat do then, eh?

mikey

Not Surge! That will just shrink the warbloggers’ wee-wees even more. Then they’ll be really pissed off.

What will president asshat do then, eh?

Leave office and collect lecture fees.

The bigger the Surge, the greater the Insurgency.

It’s my Law of Obvious Ironic Wordplay.

So far, its never failed.

“The Pentagon has cautioned that a modest surge [emphasis mine] could lead to more attacks by al-Qaeda, provide more targets for Sunni insurgents and fuel the jihadist appeal for more foreign fighters to flock to Iraq to attack U.S. troops, the officials said.

Is a ‘modest surge’ like a 1 foot tall tsunami?

a modest surge could lead to more attacks
That’s why the plan calls for a surge that is arrogant, full of itself, and insufferably smug.

Operation: Serge Gainsbourg

Operation: Bronson Pinchot

Operation: Surge Protector

Operation: Memento

Not Surge! That will just shrink the warbloggers’ wee-wees even more.

Does Surge contain soy products?

Godsdammit, and I was so sure “Onan” would figure in to the name somehow. Actually, I like “Onan’s Surge…”

And Lo, a modest surge is felt throughout the land, and a shudder as of tens of warbloggers bitterly thwarted as the pullout commenceth.

Mikey, I think this is more accurately characterized as the part in the movie where the girl has already gone down into the basement, been attacked by the killer, improbably semi-fought him off (probably through a well-timed though unlikely leap by her cat onto his head), run back upstairs, eschewed the front door for a trip up to the attic, found her boyfriend’s body, was again attacked by the killer and stabbed in her arm or leg, somehow managed to knock a box down on his head from the top shelf, limped down the stairs, gone to the front door, but is now returning to hide in the study so that she can make a phone call and save her mother’s photo album. Of course the killer disconnected the phone quite a while ago. Also she ran by several weapons on the way to the study, but passed them by for a tennis racket she knows is in the closet. also she trips and falls over nothing, so that the killer has enough time to see her go into the study.

“Is a ‘modest surge’ like a 1 foot tall tsunami?”

No, it’s more of a humble, self-effacing kind of surge; the kind of surge you could take home to meet your parents and they’d think it was all OK.

But then when he gets you alone in the car, he’s all grabby-hands.

Tonally incorrect :
http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2006/12/20061219.html

Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Press Briefing by Tony Snow
White House Conference Center Briefing Room
12:44 P.M. EST
[…]
Q: Finally, can you address this story about a possible split between the White House and the Joint Chiefs in the decision about surging troops to Iraq?

MR. SNOW: Well, number one, there is no decision about the next step forward in Iraq. So the idea that there is a decision and a squabble would be wrong. I’ve also cautioned people that tonally, it is incorrect to say that the President is in any sort of contretemps with the Joint Chiefs of Staff…

…Q: I know you said this story about the debate with the Joint Chiefs is tonally inaccurate. But the fact is —

MR. SNOW: I didn’t say it was totally inaccurate, I said I’m not going to —

Q: Tonally. Tonally.

MR. SNOW: Tonally, thank you.

Q: Right. But the fact is, someone has put the message out there that there is this dispute, and it’s not the first report that we’ve had about disputes, disagreements about the way to go forward on Iraq. I’m wondering if this is a reflection of paralysis within the administration.

MR. SNOW: No.

I can still remember as a kid the adults wearing those blue surge suits.

Tony + Anal = Tonally Snow

When the surge is over, what then? Iraq is even bloodier and more chaotic. Large sections of Baghdad are in ruins. The Shi’a have made a temporary alliance with the Sunnis to fight the Americans, and the government has mostly moved to London. Thugs and crazies control the oil in the south, and the PKK is getting noisier up north, to nobody’s advantage. What will president asshat do then, eh?

Declare victory, and walk away. (Hey, it’s worked in every other sinecure his old man’s paymasters have slotted him into!) Of course, the killing will go on, and the political chaos in the entire region will expand, and when the Chinese call in their Treasury chips it’ll be American slave labor producing cheap crap for Wal-Mart to sell in its new Indian and Latin American stores. But, hey, the C-Plus Augustus will be tucked away in Crawford, cutting brush, moutain-tricyling, and hitting his favorite comfy pillow by 9:30 every night, so why should he care?

And, Mikey, if the word ‘dis-regardment’ isn’t already in the dictionaries, it will have to be added as a shorthand for the history of the “Crooks Liars & Perverts GOP Grand Tour 2000-2006� influence on American jurisprudence…

Leave office and collect lecture fees.

lecture? uh-huh… riiiight…..

Annie Laurie, you are SO wrong. GeeDub goes to bed at 8:30.

MR. SNOW: Well, number one, there is no decision about the next step forward in Iraq. So the idea that there is a decision and a squabble would be wrong.

Ok, so with all these deep thinkers at the White House and Pentagon, there is STILL no decision about what to do now? After 3 1/2 years? That would imply that there’s been a hell of a lot of squabbling and it’s still going on.

Either they have a decision and are agreed on it, or they have not made a decision and are disagreeing about it. You can’t have both, right?

You all know that this “surge” business is at least partially motivated by the BushCorp to derail McCain?

I’m sure right now some combat soldier or marine is just figuring out that his tour will be extended or repeated or he’ll be stop-lossed, just so Jeb can secure the ’08 nomination.

Oh, and can I get a Slurm instead?

too late for my entry, but what the hell…

Operation Reach-Around

i win, yay!

….ok, thought of 2 more winners…

Operation My Little Pony

Operation Carebear

i thought Operation Rainbow Bright would be pushing it