Alles klar, Herr Kraphammer?

Shorter Charles Krauthammer: ISG? LOL.

Travis adds: Am I being overly cynical to suspect that the administration has delayed announcement of their bold, new plan for Iraq mostly because they haven’t yet thought up a bold, new name for it?


Comments: 113


Nope. It’s all about the spin, baby. They need something that sounds noble so they can accuse people who oppose it of being low-life creeps, just like with No Child Left Behind (“Why don’t you want our kids to learn?”).

They have to manipulate the preconceptions. It’s a bad habit with them, but they can quit any time they want to!


We should think up a bold new name for them! That will save them time and we can start our bold new way forward! That will make them realize that America sure is rooting for our troops!

“Operation Iraqi Roast”?


I came up with “Same shit, different day,” but I’m afraid that sounds too negative…


They have a name, but we’re in the middle of the Holiday Season. Their “Bold New Plan” is essentialy just a marketing ploy, and whats the point of unveiling a new marketing strategy right in the middle of the Holidays. Nobody’s paying attention. Best to wait until the new year. It’s not like lives are being lost or something.


Headache is exactly correct.

Since it’ll probably be the begining of the US whistling busily while it tip-toes out of the country, I’m a little partial to “Operation Iraq Freedom”, but that might be a little to subtle.


*”a little too subtle”


It damn sure won’t come out till at least after new years.
They could just go all out and call it Operation Last Crusade. It’s got everything: the finality of “last”, the Christians v Muslims angle, Sean Connery, Nazis, desperate struggle to save the world, snappy theme music.
Photo Op: Bush in a fedora, rides a tank through the desert, blows up a camel.


“Operation Fertile Excrescent”


Operation Feral Christians?


I think they’ll go back to Bush’s original choice for the invasion — Operation Awesome Kickass!


Operation Meat Grinder?


Operation Petulant Sociopath


Operation Dry Heave.


Operation Two-Wheeler?


Operation Iraqi Takeover

That way it works for whichever “plan” he comes up with.


Operation Dry Heave.

I think we have a winner!


Yeah, it’s too late in the shopping season to announce a new sale. Gonna have to wait until after Christmas. (Besides, isn’t that when all the stores have their white sales anyway?)

Given Brad and Gavin’s take on this administration, I propose “Operation BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

Or maybe “Operation Put-Off-Sending-In-More-Troops-Until-After-Christmas-So-We-Don’t-Look-Like-Scrooge-And-Piss-Off-The-Batshit-Crazy-Folks-With-a-REAL-WAR-On-Christmas”?

Hm…too long, maybe.


Some suggestions for a name for the administration’s upcoming bold new direction on Iraq (NB: these have different tones, depending on which aspect of his fabulously successful future policy the Decider wants to emphasize):

“Operation Ponies For All”

“Barbarossa II”

“Retain the Route”

“Up With People”

“Operation Wonder-Working Power”

“Mission STILL Accomplished”

“In Your Heart You Know I’m Right”

“Happy Days Are Here Again!”

“Operation Infinite Justice”

Strength Through Joy


How about “Operation Athenians in Syracuse” or “Operation The Iranian Mullahs are Laughing” or, my favorite, “Operation My Cronies Got Their Stock Market Profits, F&**&^% the Rest of the Country and the White Trash Crackers Who Are in Country Right Now”?


Maybe they’re just stalling so they can convincingly claim that Bush listened to experts, did research, spent time in Deep Thought, etc. like with his stem cell “compromise” in 2001.


I think “Operation Permanent Republican Minority” has a nice ring to it.


Operation The Goofy Game For Dopey Doctors


“Operation No This is Not a Clusterfuck, Why Do You Ask? Look Over There – A Pony!”


Operation Apple Pie Grandma.

That way, when someone criticizes the new direction, Tony Snow can leer at them and declare, “why do you hate apple pie? And Grandma?”


They printed 250,000 of “The Iraq Study Group Report?”

They can always use them for toilet paper.


Operation Freedom From Liberty

Operation Message: There Is Hope

Operation Infinite Endlessness

Operation Re-Gift Freedom

(And a joke I wrote 30 years ago: Operation: Appendectomy)


They printed 250,000 of “The Iraq Study Group Report?�

They can always use them for toilet paper.

Operation “Please Don’t Squeeze the Sharia”


Unconfirmed rumor has it called “Operation Is Hard to Spell”.

Code name: “Too Many Letters”.

For security, POTUS is now PETGOAT. Copy that. Roger.


They can always use them for toilet paper.

Well, since W. has already used up the Constitution, we’re gonna need something else.


I have a three-point plan for solving the problem in Iraq that can’t miss. It’s way better than the ISG plan.

1. Bush and Cheney resign.
2. President Pelosi begs the rest of the world for our forgiveness, then pulls the troops out of Iraq.
3. We all get on with our lives.


I’m sure Sturmbannfuhrer Assrocket and Oberfurer Krauthammer have a hardon for this:

“Operation Even More Dead Iraqi Civilians”


Yeah, I know…fuck Godwin, these fucktards won’t be happy until Iraq is empty of human life.


Operation Without A Paddle


Operation Oedipus Tex


Operation Hot Mother


Operation I ain’t Leaving


Operation POTUS Needs A Six Day Holiday Bender Filled With Mexicali Hookers, Blow & Bourbon

What the hell, throw in some meth for Cheney & Rove too.


Yeah, I know…fuck Godwin

I agree. Godwin enables wingnuts by insisting that the Third Reich was so exceptional that nothing of its like could ever happen again, especially not here.

throw in some meth for Cheney & Rove too

To keep them awake and on edge for days, clutching nuclear footballs? Gah. Those cats need downers, daddy-o.


They need Ecstacy.


Operation We’ve Always Been At War With Eastasia

Operation Yes, Dad, I’m Fixing It, Gaww

Operation Protracted Crapulence

Operation Opposite Day


Operation: Sprechenkrieg

Operation: Tube Snake Boogie

Operation: Oh Yeah? Well Why Don’t You Start Your Own War and Show Us How It’s Done Then?

Operation: Roach Motel

Operation: I’ll Burn the Whole Place Down


Operation Crescent Fresh!


I came up with “Same shit, different day,� but I’m afraid that sounds too negative…

What about “Same Ponies, Different Day”?

or Operation Thousand-Pound Shithammer?

or Operation Power Is The Ultimate Aphrodesiac And I’m In Loooooooooove?




Operation Size Doesn’t Matter


Operation Groundhog Day

LA Confidential Pantload

Why not “Operation Day By Day?” It’s vapid, pointless….oh.


I suspect the delay is so that Bush can suck the oxygen out of news covering Pelosi’s first 100 hours. That would be typical Rove.


Operation Enduring Fubar!

It sounds all military-like, and if the commanders making the proposal don’t explain the acronym to C-Plus Augustus, there will be 5,000 tshirts, 10,000 bumper stickers, and a couple of dozen tv backdrops in the pipeline before one of the smarter Oval Office enablers catches on. And then it will be too late for take-backsies, because His Stubbornness will insist that he MEANT the acronym ‘Freedom Under Basic American Republicanosity’, and he’s gonna stay the course with HIS version because he is the Decider which means he decides. Besides, who are you going to believe, your Commander-in-Chiefness or a bunch of lame-*ss linguistical types?…


Operation Loosening Sphincter

Operation Enduring Hemorrhoid.


Operation Fat Lady Sings


Operation Political Erectile Dysfunction


Operation Lead Paint Banquet

Operation Large Head Small Brain


At the age of fifteen Doug and Dinsdale started attending the Ernest Pythagoras Primary School in Clerkenwell.
When the Piranhas left school they were called up but were found by an Army Board to be too unstable even for National Service. Denied the opportunity to use their talents in the service of their country, they began to operate what they called ‘The Operation’… They would select a victim and then threaten to beat him up if he paid the so-called protection money. Four months later they started another operation which the called ‘The Other Operation’. In this racket they selected another victim and threatened not to beat him up if he didn’t pay them. One month later they hit upon ‘The Other Other Operation’. In this the victim was threatened that if he didn’t pay them, they would beat him up. This for the Piranha brothers was the turning point.


I’m a bit partial to Operation Saracen Egress.

Mostly because I think Saracen is an ethnic slur on its way back, baby. And I’m always a fan of P.T. Barnum Latin jokes.


Operation Political Erectile Dysfunction

or the asian version:

Operation Political Electile Dysfunction


“kdaddy said,
December 15, 2006 at 21:26
Operation Oedipus Tex ”

That is perfect, kdaddy!


With apologies to punx everywhere: Operation IV


Operation Mindcrime


OT, but hope all our Western Washington and British Columbia people are okay, and came through the terrible storms high and dry.


They delayed the announcement to see if the Senate is split… that’d be a major stoke, or hemmorage, of luck for them. I just hope the doctors look for Po-210.


Operation Onthesenatorsbrain


Operation Mindcrime

I had actually typed out:

Operation: Operation Mindcrime Is an Album? Seriously? Dang, I Liked That One, Too

I thought it might be too esoteric and self-referential. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, in the Bush administration.


No regrets you’ve got no goals
Nothing more to learn
Now I know you won’t refuse
Cause we’ve got so much to do
You’ve got nothing more to lose
So take this number and hook in
To Operation Mindcrime
We’re an underground revolution working overtime…”

Perhaps my favorite thing on the album:

Religion and sex are powerplays
Manipulate the people for the money they pay
Selling skin selling God
The numbers look the same on their credit cards

Politicians say no to drugs while we pay for wars in South America
Fighting fire with empty words while the fat stay fat
the poor stay poor, the rich get rich, the cops get paid
to make it safe for the one percent of the…….. aaaaaaaa spreading the disease! Everybody needs but no one wants to see, the way society keeps spreading the disease.

Ah, Queensryche. Brings back some memories.


May I?

Thank U

Weapons not food, not homes, not shoes
Not need, just feed the war cannibal animal
I walk tha corner to tha rubble that used to be a library
Line up to tha mind cemetary now
What we don’t know keeps tha contracts alive an movin’
They don’t gotta burn tha books they just remove ’em
While arms warehouses fill as quick as tha cells
Rally round tha family, pockets full of shells

Yeeee Hah?



I was gonna comment at the Wapo, but it’s been done:

The washington post has a ombuds person. If we write enough letters, the post WILL have to fire this lying b@stard.

By playa_brotha | Dec 15, 2006 1:32:37 AM | Request Removal

I think I speak for everyone when I say that its idiots like Charles Krauthammer who got us into this mess in the first place. Charles pathetic attempt to distance himself from this Administration WILL NOT WORK and history will forever remember him as a shill who killed countless innocents.

By aldous | Dec 15, 2006 1:40:37 AM | Request Removal

James Baker is no Middle East expert but Krautie surely is. He is also a battle hardened tank commander, a think tank commander that is. Waging war relentlessly from inside the beltway it is no skin off his back, so damn the IED and double down with Charlie!

By notanotherneofool | Dec 15, 2006 1:41:43 AM | Request Removal

And for ten more pages. But wtf does Michael Graham care, it’s not like there’s going to be estate taxes on the liberal Wapo empire.


Re: Kraphammer:

Operation Oppenheimer?





Operation: Krautenshitter

The mission: lead your team into a nest of insurgency and leftist apologetics, only to see your mission fail due to faulty intelligence and misguided foreign policy initiatives. Believe you are being patriotic while being idiotic. Fail, and blame it on everyone but the people who sent you on this doomed mission. Repeat ad infinitum.
This message will self destruct…
Damn, it better soon.


Operation Futile Crescent


Operation Kurtz
Operation This proves we’re not homosexual
Operation Iran has baby terri schiavo’s soul
Operation Custer
Operation They won’t impeach in mid-nuclear explosion

and, in the spirit of Brian’s earlier ref to athens and syracuse
The Sicilian Operation


How a bout just “Operation!”, a game in which an inept president tries to extract the “Wingnut” from the patient, without making his nose go red and the IED, er buzzer, go off. Fun for the entire family! If the entire family is stationed in Iraq.


“Am I being overly cynical to suspect that the administration has delayed announcement of their bold, new plan for Iraq mostly because they haven’t yet thought up a bold, new name for it?”
I’m guessing that ‘surge’ is going to be a key component. “Operation Forward Surge”?


Look firtly what do you mean by Sadly No? Are you like the sheep who saying no to me?
And your how can you keep a name like Dick? Even if you are a big man like me, it is not needed to keep yourself a dick.
I am a dick, but i don’t keep my name Dick. All the others sisters tell me I am dick.


Operation Miles Davis Hates Your White Fucking Ass


You see, this is because Miles Davis doesn’t hate your white fucking ass. Just ask Bill Evans. Miles only hated people who hated him because he was black. Miles thought Bill Evans was the best piano player so he gave him the gig. Bill Evans was white.


Operation Big Steamer

Operation Enduring Truth

Operation Size Matters

Operation Operation

Operation Nameless Fury

Operation Prep H


Name the operation for the guy who’ll lead it (from his safe seat in DC or wherever he is)

Operation Hammer Time

Operation Rolling Wheelchair

Operation Cut it Out NOW! Don’t Make Me Come in There, I Really Mean it This Time

If the Rain Don’t Stop, the Levee’s Gonna Break

The Great Lurch Forward


sleazy, scuzzy, unprincipled, & handsome

“Operation Stability Surge” utilizing “neocon mideast understanding” leading to troops levels “enhancement to withdrawal” and eventual “equitable oil sales”.


Operation No More Wire Hangers.


Operation Cleveland Steamer.


Operation Dirty Sanchez.


How about just “Operation!” And we can wire up Cheney so his nose lights up and he emits a harsh buzzing noise every time the administration screws up.


Dammit, sorry, craigie. I didn’t read far enough up the thread.


Operation: Blazing Inertia

Operation: Ooh Shiny!

Operation: Silent Thunder (this one needs to be said in a really deep, masculine voice – like if James Earl Jones were a pro-wrestler)

Operation: Lethal Ponzi

Operation: Fine Print

Y’know, this is kind of addicting. Anyone for group therapy?


Operation Dramatic Irony.


hey guys, congrats on being the funniest blog in blogtopia (yes! i coined that phrase!) and winning the 2006 weblog award!

my blog came in a distant 8th in its category (best liberal blog), but i’m surprised i was even nominated, considering how little i care about blogging these days.

wait, did i just say that out loud?


Operation: I’ll Have to Check With My Manager

Operation: Not Really My Problem Now, Is It?


Operation Surge Defective

Operation Double Down (On Hard Sixteen Against Dealer’s Ten)

Operation Reinforce Failure

Operation We’re China, Right? (from the Simpsons ep a few weeks ago with Kiefer Sutherland)

Operation You Screwed Up, You Trusted Me

Operation Nuremberg


All new and improved Way Forward! Now with Roadmap 2.0-Turbo!!


Operation What, Me Worry?


Operation Enough Already


Operation Enough Already
Operation Enduring Fiefdom


Operation Shiny Object


Operation Out With the Bathwater


Operation I’m Man of the Fuckin’ YEAR

Herr Doktor Bimler

Operation Ozymandias


Considering he’ll never be called up to serve, he’s pretty quick to offer other peoples children up for service.


The Irresistable Urge to Surge

New! Improved! Now with Menthol!

Operation Legacy

Operation Barney’s Party


Operation Shit Plus Fan


Operation The Last Ten Minutes of The Godfather


Operation Doubleplusgood Freedom Victory


[…] I’ll have to go through all the entries again to see if any of us correctly picked the winner, but it looks like the president will soon announce the launch of Operation Feed The Rush. […]


Operation Sergio Valente


“operating accomplishable”


Operation BOHICA (Bend Over, Here It Comes Again).


Operation Shiite Superstate?


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