“It’s like a Sizzler’s opened up a hospital!”
I heard from Sadly, No!’s founder, CEO, and messiah today. He appears in good spirits, despite the prospect of more icky hospital stuff on the horizon. He is planning to write a script for a TV sitcom pilot based on his experiences — maybe something like “Scrubs,” but from a patient’s point of view, and with Amber Pawlik instead of Tara Reid. Or maybe it would be like “Patch Adams,” only funny. Robin Williams would probably die in the first ep.
Okay, Seb really didn’t say he was planning on writing a sitcom script, but he is planning to someday update us all on his hospital stay with some humorous and life-affirming posts, but maybe not until he has a couple more weeks of medical wackiness and shenanigans from which he can draw upon. He sends you all his warmest regards. He sounds like he coping with with a trying experience with grace and fortitude. I think we should all offer up some Seinfeld quotes in his honor.
Okay, mine is: “Who’s going to turn down a Junior Mint? It’s chocolate, it’s peppermint, it’s delicious. It’s very refreshing.” Seb, this Junior Mint is for you.
Do German hospitals hand out bier? If so, he’s probably enjoying it. Germans are very good at beer. Also, cars and gas chamber/crematoriums.
“Don’t you see what Whatley is after? Total joke immunity. He’s already got the two major religions covered. If he ever gets Polish citizenship, there’ll be no stopping him.”
“But I don’t wanna be a cowboy!”
Has Ashcroft subpeoned his medical records yet? Looking for that “Librul Humor Vein”?
“NO SOUP FOR YOU!”
I know, that’s the lamest Seinfeld quote either, but Seinfeld was a bit before my time. (How that is possibly true, given the fact that Seinfeld ran for like 20 years, I don’t know, but it just is.)
Great, now I have a vision of Seb sitting in his hospital bed watching a male nurse give another male patient a sponge bath and Seb being mesmerised by it.
“I don’t know about you, but I’m getting a hankering for some Doublemint gum.”
As it happens, I just ate a box of Junior Mints. They’re real, and they’re spectacular! Glad to hear Seb is doing well.
Wait a minute: Ashcroft and Seb both in the hospital? You know, I’ve never seen them in the same room at the same time. Hmm…
Get ready, Seb, honey, ’cause I’m getting all dressed up in that nurse uniform, the one that you like so much. And I’m going to just come right up there to your little room and close that curtain and administer some oral…
Ask him if he’s seen the pigman yet.
As I lifelong Republican, I have never watched Sienfeld. Is he Jewish?
And that Robin Williams has way too much hair on his body to be anything but a LIE-beral so I did not care to watch him pander as a man dressed as a woman in that sado masochistic “Madame De Doubtfire” where he/she inflicted untolled damage on suspecting children.
BTW: Does Patch Adams make hosecalls? Because I have a “urological condition” and am too embarrassed to go to see my family Christian friendly doctor.
THank you. Have a nice day.
“Serenity NOW!”
Get ready, Seb, honey, ’cause I’m getting all dressed up in that nurse uniform, the one that you like so much. And I’m going to just come right up there to your little room and close that curtain and administer some oral…
Sounds like Amber is the head nurse.
“salsa!”
Because I just like to say “salsa!”
It’s a Seinfeld quote, honest.
“These pretzels…ARE MAKING ME THIRSTY!!!”
“The wheels are in motion, he said. But there was no motion. He is a very, very bad man.”
Seinfeld is a great show. everyone who says opposite is a complete idiot.
favorite quote: “Lets get nuts!!!” George costanza