Biggest College Football Game EVAR Open Thread

After spending four years at a small liberal arts college in central Ohio, I grew to absolutely despise the goddamn Ohio State Buckeyes with every inch of my being. So let’s just say I’ll be rooting for Michigan big-time today. Rawk.

…though come to think of it, I hope this is a close game, ’cause I wanna see these two match up in the national championship game.

…oh, and I guess I’m sorta back now, though I still have a ton of work to do in the next couple of weeks.


Comments: 60


I saw John Boehner walking into the stadium today. And you know what? He looks so much douchier in real life than on TV!

OSU football turns everyone into a giant asshole. I hate it.


glad you’re back Brad – hope work isn’t TOO awful.

Go Wolverines!


When I went to Michigan, spoonerism t-shirts were usually for sale before the games, e.g., “Wuck Fisconsin.” Ohio State is tougher to do that with, so most of the shirts typically read “Buck the Fuckeyes.”

That said, totally fuck a bunch of Ohio State.


Brad, even if the result is a squeaker, it would take a lot of other things happening for their to be a Mich/OSU rematch in the NC game… Cal beating USC and USC beating ND. Arkansas over Florida and WVU over Rutgers, just to mention a few…


Kathleen- is this the first time we’ve ever agreeed on anything sports-related?


Steve- yeah I know, but it’d still be sweet… ‘sides, I’m sick of USC being in the damn championship every damn year 😉


I spent 16 years working at Michigan State University without ever attending a single football game, which takes as much social effort as spending time in a small Southern town without ever attending a church supper. However, as much as MSU people hated UM people and vice versa, the Michigander loathing for anything related to Ohio trumped mere local rivalries every time. We had the better fight song, though:

Run them through for Mordor U — Watch the blood start flowing —
Hunger pangs won’t sap our will; Devour what you kill (Raw! Raw! Raw!)
See them pleading for their lives — We’re gonna eat our fill —
Go! Fight! Kill, Rend, Eat! Victory for Mordor U!”

I am told that there are alternate lyrics, but I always used these during any mandatory “fan rallies” and nobody ever complained, or noticed…


“a small liberal arts college in central Ohio.” Let me guess: Oberlin?




In other news…

Northwestern (3-8) beat the Fighting Illini (2-9). Huzzah! We’re not the worst team in the Big 10! Tear down the goal posts!

/Go Cats


Sorry, guy.

On a bright note, studies show that 94% of college football stars grow up to be wife-beating car dealers.

Smiling Mortician

Hey, Anne Laurie, here’s another one you might know. I remember it from my days growing up in Lansing:

Liquidate Ohio State and humble Woody Hayes,
They raise a lot of cattle in Columbus,
Send them back to graze.
Knock them off their ivory towers,
Send them crawling into the showers.
Down with Ohio State!
It’s a know-nothing party school.

As I recall, there are several other verses, including the second, which calls into question the beauty and intelligence of OSU students . . .


a small liberal arts college in central Ohio

Circleville Bible College?


The world is dead to me now. Thank you, Kathleen. Your wishes were not enough to stem the douchewad sunglassed Tide of Tressel. Pinko to world: “EAT IT!”

Smiling Mortician



I was going to post “Oberlin or Defiance,” but it appears Auntie Occident beat me to it.

Miami of Ohio is not centrally located, and you probably would have admitted Kent State.

Or did you go away again, give it was a 3-point loss for “The Blue”?


I`m a Toledoan who when to school at EMU. Just outside of Ann Arbor.
There is no song in the world more hateful than the UM fight song.
There are no colors more disgustingly paired than Blue and Gold.

Today is a beautiful day. I just hope the rioters in Columbus don`t get tased.


Oberlin is more well known but I’m going to guess Kenyon.


As I’ve mentioned, I didn’t experience secondary education. I assumed it to be an excessively expensive way to spend a few years drinking, doping and having tons of meaningless sex. As it turned out, I wanted to continue that life beyond a few years anyway, into a few decades. Ahem. Anyway, since I’m not a huge football fan, without having a rooting interest in the outcome, and being unfamiliar with the players histories and abilities, I find college football to be nearly impossible to watch. I do have the cal usc game on the tv, but to the extent that I’m watching it at all, I’m rooting for the offense, just ’cause that’s more fun than rooting for the defense…



Same old crap, I see. Brad R. gigglingly avoiding torture and illegal invasions; Gavin M. sardonically trying to make cartoonish sense of a country gone mad’; Retardo being sane and factual, and Seb nowere to be seen…

…and of course, Uber-patriot veteran Mikey thinking this blog is his own personal confessional.

*yawn* Wake me up when the USA self-destructs.


What about a wingnut pastor faceoff or ugly kitten post.


Dude, we’re taking over Canada before we self-destruct. Manefest destiny, bitch.
Hey, weren’t you bitching about how the Dems would NEVER take back the House from the crazy Repubs a few weeks back? How’d that go for you?


You were gone?

I kid. I kid. I kid, because I care.
Brad, dahlink, you know I want you.

Back–I want you back! Sheesh!


Speaking of teh same ol’ crap, hey, look–it’s Mal de mer! You aren’t exactly sounding any too different than the last few times you posted here, Sugar Tits. For that matter, neither are most of us. But, kettle? Pot.


Whoa!! You mean this blog is NOT my personal confessional? Shit. Can someone direct me to my personal confessional? See, I’ve got issues I need to work out…



XD I wanna see the mikey MySpace page!! Emoooo!!


Wake me up when the USA self-destructs.

Dude, that happened long ago. That’s what gives us stupid gringos license to be so stupid.


…Uber-patriot veteran Mikey…

That’s actually pretty flattering, considering how many people like to call me a traitor. I truly believe I am acting in the best interests of my country, and in spite of your new-found insanity, I thank you Mal for recognizing that my actions and statements are actually patriotic…



Dude, that happened long ago. That’s what gives us stupid gringos license to be so stupid.

Oh, sweetie…no. The USA is still the most powerful and wealthy country on the planet. Like the Soviet Union, it’s bound for self-destruction, obviously, but still…


Let’s go Wake Forest.


and in spite of your new-found insanity, I thank you Mal for recognizing that my actions and statements are actually patriotic…

Bite me, douche. Patriostism is irrational. Only Americans talk about “patriotism” The rest of world talks about nationalism. if they talk about this crap at all.


The USA is still the most powerful and wealthy country on the planet.

This is why I come to Sadly, No. I learn so much! For free!


Bite me, douche.

That’s it? Bite me, douche? That’s the best you can do? Dude, a few months ago you had this over-the-edge, strident crazy tone. Now, you just sound like a pissed off drunk truck driver on the wrong side of a benzedrine high. Look, if you’re going to keep your reputation as the wackiest S,N troll, you can’t just phone it in. You gotta work at the phraseology. I mean, we don’t have video, so we have to get a sense of the spittle flying, the hair all amess, the fast-food bags and pizza boxes piled in the corner. So come on, I’ll give you a free pass on that last unfortunate and flacid comment. Bring teh crazy. Show us you haven’t lost a step…



xmount years living next/with wolverine fans does not encourage comraderie.


Mal sez: Catsup > Ketchup.

And, yes, America’s dominance is very likely to fall one day. That’s cause things work in waves and cycles. Nations raise and wane in power, it’s what they do. Pretty basic concept to grasp.

Longer mikey:

Smiling Mortician

Am I the only one picturing Mal silently reading through post after post of the Sadlynosians passionately condemning this or that or the other fascist act, grinding his teeth, waiting for his salvation, until . . . Yes! Sports post! After days and days of stuff I can’t complain about, finally something that I can justifiably call meaningless! Now I can bitch and whine to my awful little heart’s content! O happy day!


Go easy on Mal for a bit, guys… he’s just coming down off a ten-day hangover. Can’t have been easy for him to come sneaking back here, after us fat, dumb, self-satisfied American morons failed to fulfill Mr. de Mer’s wilder Godwinian fantasies. Pointing and snickering at his shame-faced, half-heared posts, okay; but save the heavy artillery until he’s had the chance to buy some new underwear & grow back some body hair.


wel, I’m an OSU alumni. In my Freshman year, I sat in the section where the students held up the cards to make pictures during the games.

That said, in subsequent years, as an arts student, I ended up working at the Faculty Center and had to wait tables for the Saturday morning banquets and events for football supporters, the teams, and the player. What a bunch of assholes!!!!

I currently support, in my way, the School of Arts of a large Pac 10 school. Part of that means attending a few football games each season with potential donors.

College football. Bleah.


“Circleville Bible College? ”

Everyone knows Circleville is the home of the Pumpkin Festival.


So sad to see what Mal de Mer became.

But, in any case, Mal, now that you’ve turned into an asshole — fuck off now!!!


The Game?

Yale beat Harvard, 34-13.


And it’s my birthday, too.

Also, I happen to live in Columbus, after spending all of my life on the east coast. So I went to the horseshoe to go mooch off tailgates with a friend (after we watched The Game). First time I’ve ever been on the OSU campus.

For my selfish porpoises, I’m glad OSU won, because everybody at work will be happy on Monday, and that beats the alternative.

P.S. Mal de Mer, why does your name make me think of diseased sea foam?

P.P.S. Y! A!

L! E!


FINALLY. Now be funny. It’s been horrible around here without you.


Welcome to the other side of the looking glass, eh ifthethunder?


Same old crap, I see. Brad R. gigglingly avoiding torture and illegal invasions;

Mal- you see that stick? It needs to be pulled out of your bum, pronto.

I remember when you used to be a funny dude. Not so much lately. Lighten up, amigo. We miss the old Mal 😀


Woo Pig, Sooie!

May all Texas Longhorns and Tennessee Volunteers forever and in perpetuity contract herpes simplex 12 and die in horrible mattress fires!


You know, some days I don’t understand anything that anyone is talking about here. Those are always sports days.

My university didn’t even have a football team. Not an American football team, anyway.

We had a futbol team. With lots of hunky South American, European, British, and Aussie guys. This was in the 70s, and there weren’t a lot of other teams for them to play. The beginning of my interest in soccer correlates with the beginning of my interest in hunky foreign men. Boy, did those guys know how to party! And, um, other things. Woo hoo!

We did have a basketball team, though. This is how good it was: we were regularly and soundly beaten by Yeshiva University, one of the few teams that would even consent to play us.

Football (Premier League, World Cup, etc.) is the only sport I will turn on my teevee for.

I have now come to the end of my sports-related knowledge.

*waves at Brad and Retardo* Miss you guys. More than I miss the Preview button, even. (not really)

*two fingers to Mal de Mer* Miss you not at all Being Canadian doesn’t get you any Virtue Points, Seasick One. If you don’t like this blog, please return to your regularly scheduled sulking in the corner.

Carry on, sports fans! More fight songs, please, these are incredibly amusing.
I vote for him to replace Bono. It’s nice to know he’ll have something to do after 2009.


I remember when you used to be a funny dude. Not so much lately.

I know. Torture and illegal invasions are kind of a kill-joy, Because of that, I’m kind of in a ….bad mood

I’m sure I’ll perk up, at some point.


this year’s undedeated record comes on the heels of RU eliminating their tennis and swin/dive programs.

Without getting into the whole debate about which programs deserve to stay or go (and how much the coached deserve) I can say this much: tennis and swim programs tend to attract good student/athletes who graduate. Not sure what kind of talent pool RU expects to pick from after getting rules out my a lot of bright, athletic highschool seniors looking at colleges.


I went to the REAL Ohio University and not that late comer branch campus in Columbus. But I’m pretty pleased!


I went to Oberlin – it’s in northern ohio, not central. I’m guessing Kenyon as well.

I went to Michigan for law school and today is a sad sad day.

Ghost of Woody Hayes

Ahem…not everybody that went to OSU is an asshole, on the other hand…every single person from UM enjoys molesting 10 year old boys.

Hee hee.


Kathleen- is this the first time we’ve ever agreeed on anything sports-related?

It’s true, Brad. And I guess we saw where that got us…..


Well, Central Ohio has got a bunch of small liberal arts colleges, so its gonna be difficult to choose. But I am guessing Yellow Springs…

Oh and much love to Gary for jinxing UM! Thanx Gary!!1!!!


Only people who went to Kenyon call it “a small liberal arts college in central Ohio.”

It’s not like we’re ahamed, or anything. It’s just that it’s really small, and in central Ohio, and saves us the trouble of answering the next question.


Buck-eyes! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeha! That was getting pretty close near the ending, I almost had to get out my wife beating stick, but then we triumphed. She got pretty nervous though, it was kinda funny.

I would guess Brad went to Denison University, a Christian College of Liberal Arts.
Dost Thov Love Life?
Then do not sqvander time, for that is the stvff life is made of


I’m guessing Antioch.

I moved to Columbus in 1990 and have been a Buckeye fan – it is an amazing redemption in the last 6 years, after the depths of frustration under John Cooper. Something like being a Red Sox fan – maybe you could understand.


Hi there, If you don’t like topics with many links, just delete this topic.


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