Shorter Ben Carson
Posted on November 5th, 2015 by Oregon Beer Snob
“I am not a crank. Also, there are too many states these days. Please eliminate three.”
[Credit to, well, everybody since we’re laughing all over the internet, but AFAICT, a M. Bouffant comment at alicublog was the first reference to Ben’s wonderful idiocy.]
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Although Mr. The Bastard located a possible source of Dr. Carson’s fascinating analysis, looks as if medieval historians have gotten, you know …
A TPM commenter has made the Civ game connection as well.
I’m gonna stick with the obvious “he’s just completely batshit bonkers” explanation, as I pictured above.
But … but … but various of scientists say it! Anything scientists say can’t be trusted, and when it’s various of scientists, well, that’s like the CIA confirming they did something by denying they did it.
And what the fuck happened to my orgone accumulator? It was right over there last I saw it.
Did you check to see if it fell down the well of luminiferous aether?
There was a Mother Jones article that connected the “Pyramids were Joseph’s Granaries” hypothesis with the works of another of BBBB’s favorites, Cleon Skousen.
http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2015/09/ben-carson-conspiracy-theory-cleon-skousen
We are almost at the point where it will be news if the good Doctor says something based in fact.
Alas, truthiness is more important to the pig people than those pesky facts.
I think that’s why utterly batshit idiocy shit like the pyramid granary are the only kinds of things that could possibly derail folks like Carson and Trump. The GOP faithful only take notice when some asshole espouses ideas so fucking stupid that even they think “Wait, wut?”
Even then, I figure there are only about 2% that may have even that much capacity for rational thought.
There was a Mother Jones article that connected the “Pyramids were Joseph’s Granaries” hypothesis with the works of another of BBBB’s favorites, Cleon Skousen.
Just what this country needs, a right-wing fundamentalist Seventh Day Adventist inspired by a right-wing fundamentalist Mormon.
there are too many states these days. Please eliminate three.
Damn straight!
Why do we need two Dakotas, two Carolinas, and two Virginias?
While most of the wackiest things that come out of Carson’s mouth aren’t likely to be based in fact (think: Nazi gun control and Obamacare is worse than slavery), the political neophyte sometimes straight up admits he doesn’t know what he is talking about:
Tee hee… What is it with Vietnam-vintage GOPers lying about their military records…?
http://crooksandliars.com/2015/11/ben-carson-caught-big-lie-about-west-point
Ben Carson is the candidate for people who move their lips when they’re reading something to themselves.
Just wait until the Southern Baptist GOP base finds out that Seventh Day Adventist Carson thinks that they will all go to hell because they go to church on Sunday.
That’ll be fun.
OT, but serious food porn…
Trump himself is a reminder that making outlandish or even offensive statements—think his trashing of Sen. John McCain’s (R-AZ) military record or his disparaging comments about Mexican immigrants—may have little to no impact on poll performance.
Why do we need two Dakotas,
higher speed limit, cheaper cigarettes…
As Sherman explains, Clemente, head of hard news at the network (think Will’s favored stomping grounds, “Special Report”), is in competition with prime-time boss Bill Shine to replace Roger Ailes
Just wait until the Southern Baptist GOP base finds out that Seventh Day Adventist Carson thinks that they will all go to hell because they go to church on Sunday.
That’ll be fun.
Let the sectarian violence begin!
this was Facebook today:
wsj: ben carson embellishes truth once again; totally gullible grifter
fb fundie fans: lamestream media is mean! ben doesn’t lie, he’s a christian! liberals are terrified of him and they are sheeple…go get them ben!!!
other fb fundie fans: amen!
other fb fundie fans: amen!
other fb fundie fans: amen!
other fb fundie fans: amen!
etc. etc. so totally NOT sheep…
I’m holding a virtual book sale of all my current titles still in print. They’re all affordable. Even if you don’t buy anything, please spread the word. We desperately need the money.
Truthiness indeed trumps facts for the pig people. Hands Up, Don’t Shoot! Campus Rape Epidemic! “Islam” and “Muslims” Separated By Hermetical Seal from “Fundamentalist Islam” and “Violence-Condoning Muslims”!** We know the latter from our own Theologian in Chief, who himself is beyond question a Christian, because he self-identifies as such. Um, quite unlike how the ISIS boys self-identify as Muslims?
**Real Muslims deplore Fundy Muslim Violence as un-Islamic and must never ever be conflated with Fundy Violent “Muslims”. That said, we must strive to not offend Real Muslims, or else they might get angry and radicalize into….coff coff, additional un-Islamic ersatz Muslims. (Hint: they’re “real” Muslims, subject to Islamophobic Profiling and Overreach, right up until they leave bodies on the ground).
But let’s get back to important subjects like Dr. Carson and the pyramids…..
Inkberrow, if you have something to say, please say it. Preferably in a way that at least simulates knowing what you’re talking about.
Austin, if you have any specific objection to offer, please offer it. Preferably in a way that at least bears passing resemblance to substantive debate.
Hoo boy. An incoherent, fallacy of relative privation, inappropriate for a snark site, troll post. Countdown to LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
in 3
2
1
I may have been a bit tipsy when I let it past the spam filter last night. It’s LOL worthy on this morning’s sober examination though, so whatevs.
“Incoherent” better describes your offering than Austin’s, Pupienus, though both reflect the unreflective, tiny echo chamber reacharounds which appear to predominate here. Pesky specifics immaterial…..