Fixing The Internet
Darn this Internet, always messed up and in need of fixing.
Ding-dong. Who’s there? Oh, it’s John of Powerline again.
Miss World: The Climax Approaches
The finale of the Miss World contest is Saturday night, and the betting odds are starting to take shape.
And it’s… Why, if it isn’t John of Powerline yet again.
It’s hard to say. Right now, it’s like a limbo contest in which they’re already underground. The latest is an absurd photoshop job of Michelle Malkin ostensibly wearing a bikini in a “Girls Gone Wild” pose.
Oh, let’s just sink a little lower, shall we?
Thank you. This has been Fixing The Internet.
We’re terrible people, with our evil photo shopping ways. You know what they say, one day we’re just adding humorous content to the web, the next we’re dropping the f-bomb every which way, causing many a great palpitation. Finally we just completely lose it and start talking about Masturbation over the internet with young teenage boys… Wait a minute…
Teh eyes! Teh eyes! They burn!
You just didn’t.
You did.
Oh Lord.
I just pooped.
Wait, John thinks that pic is fake? Is he serious? Is that real? Is or is not Michelly going to be pissed that John called her real body “beefy”? Where am I? What’s happening?
I don’t know what is up or down!
While the Right does policy, the Left does photoshop.
The Right wins on the issues, the Left loses with hatred.
And now the left is trying to say that Republicans are covering for Mark Foley, when the fact is that Mark Foley lied to Republicans and the Republicans didn’t know of those IMs until yesterday.
When Republicans knew of those IMs, they demanded that Foley resign. Because the Republicans have high standards.
When a Republican Congressman tries to get into the pants of a 16 year old page, he is asked to resign, or else.
When a Democrat Congressman sodomizes a Congressional page, they don’t do a thing to him and they renominate him five times.
Heck, when a Democrat Congressman runs a prostitution ring out of his house, they make him the heir apparent to Kennedy and Kerry.
And when a Democrat Congressman suggests that someone sink money into his district before bribing him, that man is held up as a foreign policy expert.
And when a Democratic President has multiple affairs and lies about it to a grand jury, that’s not considered grounds for removal from office.
So it’s not real? Confed Yankee is ON THE RAMPAGE
And when a Democratic President has multiple affairs and lies about it to a grand jury, that’s not considered grounds for removal from office. Yup, because when a guy lies about an embarrassing but consentual affair it’s something worth investigating for two years. I love Gary’s legal system.
Oh, but lying about a war Gary? Nope, we can’t impeach a president for that. That’s so unhinged.
Like she would even look HALF as good as that in real life.
Bush hasn’t lied about a war.
Yeah, Gary, sure. That’s why the US was greated as liberators, found those massive quantities of WMDs Saddam was 45 minutes away from launching at New York and how that National Intelligence Estimate said that the war isn’t becoming a source of huge resentment within the muslim world. Oh and freedom is spreading throughout the Middle East thanks to the flying shards of a better tomorrow.
Latest Gary posts: typically mendacious, yet strangely subdued and not up to the real Gary “Only We Can Keep You Safe From EEEVILL Islamofacists Because of Saddam’s Nuclear Weapons and Hatred of Democracy” standard. We yearn for the full-on wingnut Gary of yesteryear.
haha. ” ‘Iraqis hugging US soldiers to tightly; to many WMDs to count; difficulty moving in deep, deep snow…’ uhh, nope, nothing in here about robust insurgency.”
Sure it would be wrong, but exactly HOW wrong would it be to even simply mention ping pong balls here.
Just askin’…
mikey
Mikey, I don’t feel it would be EEVULL. But I’m just a bad person.
I hear a certain, recently-resigned Republican Congressmen photoshopped J-Pod’s head onto the ripped body of a 16 year-old page.
i think gary is either a S,N! sockpuppet or some banchut contractor paid to troll (a la Katherine Harris)
i prefer sock puppet – cuz its such cool theatre…
Daisey, Daaaiseee…
o
While the Right does brie, the Left does Easy-Cheez.
The Right wins at mah-jongg, while the Left loses Wack-a-Mole.
And now they’re trying to say that the Right lied about who ate the last KitKat bar when everyone knows that the Right doesn’t even know what a KitKat bar is and even if they did they wouldn’t like them.
When the Right tries to get into the pants of a 16 year old page, he is asked to resign, or else. {Sorry — that one was funny enough all by itself}
When the Left buys up all of the world’s kittens and puppies and sells them over the internet for use as either dessert topping or marital aids, they put him at #23 on the order of succession to the British throne.
. . . jeepers, is this fun! Gary must be the happiest guy on earth doing this all day. Y’all should try it!
Hey, that was cool. Now can you fix it so the one in orange’s head is on the one in red’s body?
What? Why’s everybody cringing?
Okay, fine, I’ll go, but next time Gary comes over you should ask him whether or not he’s being somehow compensated. Have you done that yet? They’re not allowed to say no.
Sorry if that’s totally obvious; we were doing it on the old Lieberman blog and we were like, why didn’t we think of this before?
1 out of 8, I’m not shitting you. We asked 8 Joe fans and only one said “no,” and he was the only one who sounded legit anyway.
The rest of ’em all talked like Gary.
And now the left is trying to say that Republicans are covering for Mark Foley, when the fact is that Mark Foley lied to Republicans and the Republicans didn’t know of those IMs until yesterday.
O RLY Gary? From tomorrow’s Daily Worker … I mean, New York Times …
WASHINGTON, Sept. 30 — Top House Republicans knew for months about e-mail traffic between Representative Mark Foley and a former teenage page, but kept the matter secret and allowed Mr. Foley to remain head of a Congressional caucus on children’s issues, Republican lawmakers said Saturday.
Don’t choke on your Cheetos, brother.
please. I think everyone knows that MM would take her top off in a second to get some attention.
Clarke! Don’t make him say Rumpelstiltskin. He’s kind of our Five O’Clock Charlie.
O
Um…
Does anyone know who did the photoshopping job? Was it a “lefty hater”? Or was it a “righty lover” looking for a bit more “oomph” to his fantasies?
Hindeporker thinks that body with MM’s head on it is fat? He must not look in the mirror very often.
Will someone please tell Gry Rpprt that, when used as an adjective, the word is Democratic.
Unless he’s been reading that old Newt Gingrich memo again.
RubDMC said,
Will someone please tell Gry Rpprt that, when used as an adjective, the word is Democratic.
Rove allegedly did a pole that shows the functionally illiterate members of the Republican base respond more favorably to the word “Democrat.” Guess this means the Evangelicals signed all the folks in the local sanitarium up for absentee ballots and weekly updates of “Conservative Comix.”
Rove allegedly did a pole
ILO current Republicanish scandals? Funniest typo of the week.
Latest Gary posts: typically mendacious, yet strangely subdued and not up to the real Gary “Only We Can Keep You Safe From EEEVILL Islamofacists Because of Saddam’s Nuclear Weapons and Hatred of Democracy� standard. We yearn for the full-on wingnut Gary of yesteryear.
It probably has something to do with a change in medications.
OK, photoshop experts opine: The colour and the lighting seem to match for the fake MM’s head and body. Surely that is complete ‘nother woman rather than a head transplant?
R/e photo #2: Jumpin’ Jehosaphat! If I wasn’t gay before…. Oh, and Gav? Please don’t get any funny ideas about pasting Midge Decter or Phyllis Schlafly’s heads on bikini models. Or, worse yet, the bikini models’ heads onto Midge Decter and Phyllis Schlafly’s bodies.
The trim on that bikini kerns.
Wow. A girl in a bikini. You’re really pushing the limits here boys!
Or something boring.
Annie, have you been asleep?
I took a nap, what’s it to you? And what does that have to do with the fact that NOTHING on this site makes sense?????????
It’s not as poop-filled as 3poops though. I’d say something snarky about Pinko Poopo, but that would be redundant.
Do you have any hot photoshopped semi-nude pix of Marie Jon’?
I can sense this turning into the Powerline version of Windowlicker before too long and I’m scared….
Gary Ruppert said,
October 1, 2006 at 0:58
Bush hasn’t lied about a war.
——————————————
True, he’s lied about wars (note the plural).
“And what does that have to do with the fact that NOTHING on this site makes sense?????????”
Dear sweet annie, you have to have at least two functioning braincells to understand things here…you, sadly, only have the one.
Annie is just jealous that another female is the subject of discussion.
Nope not me. That’s Jillian’s who hates women. 🙂
Hey, Gavin–could you possibly reverse “Michelle’s” bikini wax job? You know,,, think of that sight gag from the 1st “Scary Movie. Remember, a hairy Michelle is a happy Michelle!
[…] fromA mashup of Sadly, No! and […]