Fuck – A Bleg

Sigh… this may very well be the hardest post I’ve ever tried to write for this site. Not necessarily the hardest post I’ll ever try and write for the site (I’ve got something in mind later that might just eclipse this one), but that’s neither here nor there.

Back on topic, the thing is… I don’t really take to charity easily. It’s just the sort of person I am. I overpay my taxes. I’ll ride a catastrophe curve for a few months. I’ll go without eating for a bit. It’s not out of some individualist bullshit about bootstraps and the pulling thereof or some moral opposition to charity, but rather probably a low sense of self-preservation. I don’t like to be a burden and if I can muddle through I will.

And well, there’s that operative word, “if i can“.

Those of you who have followed this blog and have been my loyal readers probably know that this last year has been… shall we say “fun” for the Cerberus household?

There was the transphobic discrimination that not only threw me out of a job I loved and gave me scars that I promise to emotionally process when I have the time (after the Apocalypse looks free), but also completely drained what meager savings I and my partner had due to their slashing of my hours.

There was the disowning from my family members which cost me a source of familial love, emotional support, and Bob damn I feel like a villain for even mentioning this, but a financial safety net when things got uncomfortably tight. And losing that net meant I couldn’t ever again miss a step.

And hey, not to continue the pity party without stop, I’ve done all right. I have multiple jobs and have had them since pretty soon after I lost the big one and they almost pay my side of the bills.

All things being stable, the Cerberus household might not have missed a step. All things being stable, being the operative phrase.

Unfortunately, my partner’s job decided to dick her around. Maybe it had to do with her being an out queer person or being masculine in behavior in a more feminine office environment. Maybe it didn’t. I dunno, not worth speculating.

But the end result was that they bullied her out of a job, delivering a long series of emotional abuse and impossible standards that when met were regarded with “I dunno, you might still fail me in the future, so I’m going to disregard all of your hard work”. And delivering her one last fuck you out the door by promising her a severance package to buy her a few months to find employment and then not actually delivering it or responding to phone calls or emails about it.

So what does that all mean?

I’m broke. And might be homeless or at least out of a way to pay my bills pretty soon.

And I know. I feel like shit about doing this. About… asking for help from readers who just want to see me rip the throat out of some racist nutbar with a Napoleon Complex and a vocabulary rented out on the cheap as a wind-down from the shit going on in their lives. We all have shit that we’re dealing with and I know that I’m not the only one on the edge of financial or emotional collapse. I get that.

But nonetheless I’m here, because you’re what I got. If you can help, great. If you can’t, that’s cool too. I’m just sorry I couldn’t somehow prevent this post from ever being written. I feel like by writing this post I’m breaking some big rule I should have set for myself. But it’s here now.

The link for donations is below:

Donate Button with Credit Cards

I’m sorry. Normal funny will resume shortly.



Comments: 35


In. Sorry I hesitated. A little. But not much… Then it was, wait a minute, WTF? How could I not do this?


In. We love you, Cerb.


At great cost to the Smut Clyde Intoxication Fund…


In. and best wishes to Cerberus & partner.


We are not a civilized people if we don’t help each other. Be ye proud that you can ask for that help in the knowledge that what can be given is yours.


Been lurking here for awhile, but: How can we not help? I’m in.


Sorry, friend, but all my money is tied up in currency!

Aw jeez, lookit those big, kohl-smeared eyes………………….

Ya got me.


Aaaaaaargh ! Life sure has been throwing you some nasties recently, Cerb.
There’s no shame in being poor or in asking friends for help when you are busted. I do. And I have some rich RL friends of my extreme youth, fortunately for me.They actually bought my house and set up the proceeds in a Trust that gives me a monthly amount to pay my bills, while at the same time, I have life tenancy on my cottage and can collect the rent on the house. So, I am better off than I have been in years.Still can’t afford new shoes or dentistry though.
Would never have happened if I didn’t tell them about my vets bills problem and asked for help.Friends do that.


Well it’s not enough for a gay abortion but I’ve chipped in. But, once we get enough chippers it’ll be gay abortions for everyone! SOCIALISM!


And delivering her one last fuck you out the door by promising her a severance package to buy her a few months to find employment and then not actually delivering it or responding to phone calls or emails about it.

That there is the mark of Real Shitty People™. I can only hope that the next engine to fall off a plane lands on that MF’er.

And with that, I’m in.


I will give you a lil sumthin sumthin once I have some extra.

In the mean time is there an employment lawyer type in the house? The severance package thing smells on several levels.

Athena's Owl, Liz

I am a long-time lurker and first time poster. First of all, a hi to all the Sadlinauts! This is one site where I love reading the comments section!

This site has entertained and informed me more than any other, and I am happy to make a contribution to you, Cerberus. I think you work harder than any of the so-called journalists in the Blogo- or Clogospheres.


“Sagman, Bennet, Robbins, Oppenheim and Taff”
“Sagman, Bennett, Robbins, Oppenheim and Taff”
“Sagman, Bennet, Robbins, Oppenheim and Taft”
“Sagman, Bennett, Robbins, Oppenheim and Taft”

One for the Seinfelt pedants 🙂


Also, I would if I wasn’y struggling myself 🙁


In the mean time is there an employment lawyer type in the house?

Dewey, Cheatem and Howe?


Done – Really hope it helps!


In the mean time is there an employment lawyer type in the house

I yoostabee a union thug, will that help?


Delurking to contribute. Best of luck.


Employers regularly rely on the horror and confusion that surrounds being laid off or fired with welching out on promises to employees, even when relations with said employee were cordial. I thought if someone wanted to do a little pro bono for the Cerb household that would help.


I’m delurking just long enough to report my contribution. Sorry to hear about your dire straits, Cerberus. I’m hoping things improve for both of you soon. Well, I’m back to lurking again.


For those of you who have indicated “a-lurking” or those still situated, come on in and join te party…And really, we won’t bite.

In any event, thanks for coming out of the wood work and making your presence known.

Now off to some old haunts to spread the news that we are having a fund-raiser, for one of the strongest, snarktacular and wonderful writers and persons on all of these here internets!!!!!

xoxox Cerb,



Can one contribute via, say, money order? Paypal gives me the willies.


Lula bit but hope it helps!


In any event, thanks for coming out of the wood work and making your presence known.

Generally, people bail when I de-lurk.

Waiting on checks from clients who apparently read “Due and Payable Upon Receipt” as “go ahead and wait 60 or 90 fucking days, not like anyone’s eating” but when they stop being deadbeats, I’m in.



Thanks for all you do.


M Bouffant-

My email is cerberussadlyno@gmail.com and I can send snail-mail directions for those who want to send help through the non-e-formats.

Which um…


I’m working on a post expanding more on this, but…

You are the best readers in the history of ever. Last night and this morning, I’ve been reduced to tears over how generous you have been. Last week I was staring at my financial future and just breaking in half. Today, I can breathe. I feel like things might actually be okay and it’s all thanks to your incredible generosity. Seriously, everyone, I… I have no words for how much you dug into your piggy banks for a wretch like me. It’s incredibly humbling. I’m going to put up a follow-up post, but thank you.

Every last one of you. THANK YOU! From the bottom of my coal-encrusted heart.


Holy fuck everybody. New post saying what I feel about everything.

You are lovely amazing wonderful beautiful readers.

Thank you.

Normal funny will resume shortly, but in the meantime. Thank you so much. From both me and my partner. I feel so free and it’s all thanks to you. Now, excuse me. I need to go cry a little bit again in joy over how fucking amazing you all are.

"Orange Mike" Lowrey

I do hope the partner pursues Shakezulu’s suggestion and goes after the lying bastard ex-bosses. My lover can tell you, such victories are sweet.


Just a pinch but sent with love. That’s what this place is all about!



You’re welcome Cerb. Glad I could help.


It’s not much (stupid student loans) but I can do without booze for a weekend to help out someone who consistently makes the internet a better place.


Lurker here: I am so sorry but blame sequestration on my lack of ability to help.


I’m not an absolute, complete, inveterate, lead-;ined lurker since I’ve posted once or twice before.

I do always read the ‘longer’ Cerb (at least until my eyeballs start bleeding); and am really happy to support you: the piper who’s always doing the piping.

I’m truly sorry things have sucked so much for you recently; thanks for all you do here at S,N.


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