Why Do I Get the Feeling that if we Ran Siberia, we’d be Arguing it Was Filled with Ski Lodges?

Fuck the photoshop. I want this image forever linked to Robert Johnson’s lame attempts at post hoc rationalization.

Robert Johnson, Business Insider Humanity Outsider:
THE OTHER SIDE OF THE GITMO STRIKE: Detainees Are Treated Absurdly Well

We go on and on here about the sad truism that is “IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION” here at Sadly, No! Because unfortunately IT’S ALWAYS PROJECTION with so many right-wing arguments, freak-outs, and accusations thrown out at liberals. And that sad reality is rarely ever more true when it comes to the conservative fetish object of “Personal Responsibility”. “Personal Responsibility” is the conservative one stop response to pretty much any and all discrimination and bigotry in the world.

Oh, are you poor and starving on the streets because rich people are hogging all the money and have actively opposed the notion of social safety nets? Welp, should have had some “Personal Responsibility” and magicked up a high paying job from your colon. Oh, are you queer and being harassed for it? Welp, maybe you should have thought about “Personal Responsibility” before you started shoving your differences in people’s faces. Oh, are you a woman and you’ve been raped? Welp, you definitely should have shown some “Personal Responsibility” before going to a place that contained at least one rapist while living in a rape culture that actively and passively condones it… I mean, something about short skirts and being a whore, I dunno.

And for all they love the word (and only the word) when they are trying to dodge their way out of empathy or actually having to pretend that the suffering and deaths of “undesirables” isn’t the fucking point, there is nothing they actually hate accepting more in substance.

Conservatives hate taking actual personal responsibility for their successes. Every kid gunned down by their proud successes in making the 2nd Amendment such a third rail that no one dares even pass obvious gun control measures. Every back-alley abortion chop shop that’s allowed to endure and crop up because the conservatives have been blowing up and murdering real abortion doctors by the handfuls. Every economy tanked into the toilet because of their fetishistic love of how libertarian reforms make the rich richer. Every massive disaster made worse because poor responses to Anthropic Climate Change have had dire consequences to world weather patterns.

They hate getting the credit for these deliberate successes and constantly try and throw the blame on anyone else they can or just try and deny the consequences of their policy away.

And that has never been more true than the hesitancy in which conservatives approach their eternal monument to their greatest successes. That being our permanent illegal prison in Guantanamo Bay. Not only did we kidnap any Ahmed, Bettina, and Muhammad we could roust off the streets and accuse of a crime, ripping them away from their families and disappearing them for years and then ritually torturing them with no promise of release. But we then turned them into a public badge of our war crimes, practically daring foreign nations to try and call us out on our shit as we straight up took their citizens as well into our hell hole. And then once the smoke had cleared and we all realized that there was no way in Hell we’d be able to keep these people legally and it was time to fess up and release our prisoners. Conservatives got another bright idea and decided it wanted to burn liberals for “releasing terrorists” if they followed the law, thus ending up with a situation where we all have a not-so-secret secret prison filled with illegal detainees in a permanent torture camp that will never be closed because Congress is too frightened of bad press from bad-faith conservative assholes to do the right thing.

And so conservatives, thanks to all these successes, are left with a permanent monument to how far America has fallen in public regard and why it has deserved to do so and whose fault that squarely is.

So, left with no other choice other than to admit their fuckups and let go of some pressure to ensure their mistakes are cleaned up with only a minimum of painful fallout, conservatives turn to one of their only two responses to the rewards of their policy decisions:

1) Blaming liberals for it

or

Shorter (or the last port before Jungle):

  • 2) Do I really even need to say it? It was the verbatim in his fucking POST TITLE for fuck’s sake. Sigh. All right: Ignore your lying eyes, Gitmo detainees are treated absurdly well in their illegal permanent imprisonment where they are kept on mere suspicion of crimes that the American government knows it cannot win a real criminal case on (because of all the torture) because of an absurd assumption that muslimy people are comic-book supervillains like Doctor Doom.

Which yeah, let’s go back to that post title for a second. They’re not just being treated “well” or “surprisingly well” or even “better than you’d expect”. Nope, they’re being treated “absurdly well”. I mean, it’s absurd how kindly we are treating our permanent disappeared uncitizens, ripped away from their families, regularly tortured, many of whom lacking any official “charge” before receiving this permanent life sentence imprisoned by idiots too weak to actually stand up for what’s right. Fuck, I know if I was to be disappeared in the middle of the night, I would want to end up in the lovely bootheels of American masters than in the state prisons of any of those dictators we are obviously better than.

It’s such a lovely euphemism for what they actually mean. That they are being treated “absurdly well” because in the conservative mind, the only “just” way to treat anyone who is guilty of being suspiciously muslim is to shoot them in the back of the head in front of their weeping families after nuking all their neighbors and friends. And by lovely I mean disturbing.

And on that cheerful note, let’s go on a dainty stroll for the many varied tropical fruits that await.

The latest Guantanamo Bay hunger strike is working as planned.

Insidious hunger strikers! Like that evil vile Gandhi fellow! Cruelly suffering unto themselves in direct assault to their righteous overlords! What a cruel and underhanded trick!

…And you know what the saddest part is? Pretty much every mouthpiece for a brutal oppressive power ever referring to a prisoner of said oppressive power engaging in a hunger strike actually really does condemn their prisoners in exactly the same way including Gandhi. Lots of treatment of self-destruction as a sinister attack, accusing it of being a media stunt, of working to increase terrorist violence against the oppressive power, etc… Every last one including Gandhi himself.

With 31 of 166 detainees acknowledged as hunger strikers, international media reports are hailing this as a desperate protest by mistreated men.

I mean, honestly, desperate? Why the hell would those liberal socialist commie, American-hating bastard liars ever see the detainees as desperate and mistreated? The only explanation is international anti-American sentiments and-

CNN’s Christiane Amanpour interviewed public defender Carlos Warner, who claims that his clients face “dire” conditions ever since a new commander took over Guantanamo and the White House abandoned plans to close the detention center.

Oh… right… that.

Well… uh… er… you’re the poopyhead!

I mean, it’s not like being literally abandoned by your oppressors in a hellish illegal camp might dishearten victims who have lost all hopes to see their families again because their jailers are too cowardly to even fully acknowledge their existence.

Or that your bosses literally turning a blind eye to your permanent torture camp might give the green light to all sorts of abusive and authoritarian behavior on behalf of jail commanders. Especially if they are stuck in a dead-end assignment that none of your superiors will ever acknowledge fully and you’re awash in cultural messages that no one will give a fuck what you do to these unpeople who are probably all terrorists directly responsible for 9/11 anyways.

I mean, that’s like… madness… or… something… I’ll stop talking now.

Military spokesman Navy Capt. Robert Durand tells a different story, however, maintaining that the strike is an “orchestrated event intended to garner media attention,” according to the New York Times.

Oh, if only dear readers, if only.

Yes, we’re going to “he said”/”she said” with the oppressive authority itself. Because abusive authorities never ever lie about their mistreatment of prisoners or accuse those who try and draw attention to their reality of just “trying to get media attention” as if that would somehow be a bad thing to an oppressive authority that really was going above and beyond like they claim.

So which is the real story? When I visited Guantanamo earlier this month, it was hard not to see things from the military’s point of view.

Because you were invited specifically by the military as a deliberate sympathetic voice given a cherry-picked tour of a facility that straight up blocks most genuine aid-workers who would have any experience whatsoever touring state prisons of oppressive authorities.

I mean, fuck, did you really think that the Gitmo military authority wouldn’t be scrubbing up and putting on their best face when allowing a very rare media presence? That this isn’t standard practice by any abusive incarceration facility whether it be the torture prison of some petty dictator or a poorly run American prison being investigated for complaints.

That you managed to fall for it hook line and sinker and then publicly continue to reference this on your paid writing gig for the Business Insider demonstrates that you are sadly probably well suited for a job of repeating what businesses would like the general public to hear with little to no critical thinking or self-awareness.

Take the incident that started the strikes: When a guard allegedly defiled a Koran during cell inspections. The base has clear protocols in place to prevent such an incident, with all inspections performed by a Muslim interpreter under the supervision of trained guards and under the direction of the on-base cultural advisor, a fifty-something Iraqi named Zak.

Zak tells me he doubts there was any breach of protocol — something the military officially denies as well.

It’s also hard to believe that guards, who already gripe about the difficulty of their assignment, would do anything that would make their lives tougher.

Dear Bob, where to begin with this rusty smear of santorum.

Um… let’s see, there’s the fact that the CNN article he directly links which is already pretty well aligned with American interests and perspectives to begin with notes that the detainees were actually willing to give up the right to own Korans entirely if it would only end the abusive searching in general. You know, because abusive and deliberately humiliating searches occurring at all hours, being incredibly invasive, and often physically or sexually abusive is sadly a common staple of American prisons.

There’s the fact that also in said article was a note that the protests were mostly about the denial of sources of heat in the winter and the direct impact that was having on their health and safety and were based entirely on the new commander not giving a shit about what they were previously allowed because “what the fuck, they are here forever anyways”.

There’s the fact that 2/3s of the Gitmo detainees are not only innocent by way of illegal torture or uncharged and indefinitely detained on bullshit, but full on, actually cleared of charges and ready to transfer innocent who have been forever locked in a hellhole and mistreated because while we’re ready to admit that they were innocent at the time. We, and any nation we would send them to, are now terrified that 10 years of torture and illegal detention might elicit a few anti-American sentiments and “terrorist” sympathies in their once-innocent victims.

And then we get into the “meat” of the fail as it were. The fact that he’s honestly arguing that prison guards would never ever abuse their charges if the rules say they shouldn’t. Because they would fear “making their jobs harder”. I mean… do I even need to counter this with all the “not approved” abuse that state and federal prison guards regularly engage in and the wealth of scholarship regarding it? Or get into the way that our illegal bullshit prisons only have the minimum of oversight that they do because of the sheer level of outright torture and other war crimes that were being committed there? Or mention that there’s only a “Zak” because Gitmo jailers in particular have been ripping up Korans as if they were the Hulk’s pants?

And that’s just the surface layers of the unblinking unquestioning bullshitting for an authority!

Zak demonstrated why Koran inspections are important, taking a hardcover Koran, flipping it upside down, and showing the wide opening under the spine.

Last time they stopped Koran searches, he explains, several detainees stashed medication in these tunnels of paper and then took the medication all at once in an unsuccessful suicide attempt. Suicide is another effective way of getting media attention, and there remains a rumor among detainees that three simultaneous suicides would force the Pentagon to close Guantanamo — despite three suicides already happening in 2006.

In short, it’s not at all clear that the Koran incident even happened, and the strikers’ demand that Koran searches be stopped is impossible.

!?

The hebbitywhatthefuck?

I-I… Scuse, me, one sec, clearing cache of all critical thinking and basic level empathy and let’s try again.

Okay, so let’s forget the many many failures of… everything here, I’ll leave that to you all.

Let’s instead just follow the oppressive authority’s “logic” as if it wasn’t the half-farted post-hoc rationalization for the abusive system in place.

So, removing basic humanity and let’s go.

MOUTHPIECE MCSADJUSTIFICATION: Okay, so we need to search through the Korans. Super important. Why? Well, obviously, they might try to sneak things inside of it. What? Like shivs or bombs or super spy acid that will allow them to break their chains and go on a rampage of revenge ending in a dramatic helicopter escape and lots of pyrotechnics? No, not really. We’re mostly filled with grocers we yanked off the street one day because someone else we tortured threw out random names to make us stop. I mean, they might sneak in medicines… What? Medicine doesn’t sound all that bad and it actually seems to be pretty important to have considering that we’ve had a terrible history of getting life-saving medicine into the hands of our illegal detainees? Um, well they could swallow a lot of it and try to kill themselves… How would that be a security issue for the camp? Well, it could make the illegal prison look bad and bring media attention! Which is bad because… we don’t do anything bad anymore and besides we definitely need to look through Korans!

ROBERT JOHNSON: Clearly, given this impeccable chain of logic, we can only conclude that the Gitmo prisoners are Lying McLiartons and it is patently impossible that anyone in a location that has destroyed MANY Korans could have done it yet again once they were smug in the knowledge that their abused prisoners have literally no recourse of freedom at this point.

And… hurk… Sorry, I think the remnants of whatever remains of my black and tarnished soul just tried to violently expel itself from my body just trying to follow that.

As for the claim that detainees are mistreated, that also does not jibe with what I saw in Guantanamo. While indefinite detainment without trial may be morally offensive

Abort/Retry/FAIL Robert Johnson!

Anytime you find yourself going “blah deblah may be morally offensive”?

That’s your conscience desperately trying to cluebat you upside the head so hard you won’t be able to spell your name for a week.

Yes, it “may be morally offensive”. Because it’s a gross abuse of human rights, an international war crime, a grievous violation of the spirit of the law envisioned by our Bill of Rights, and one of the worst things we can do to someone.

We are literally taking random people and putting them in jail FOREVER without even the pretense of justice, without the pretense of a fair trial and refusing to fix our fuck ups when the regime changed because “it might make us look bad and besides they probably hate us now”. By choosing this action we actually managed to surpass many infamous oppressive systems in our cruelty to illegal prisoners. Apartheid South Africa? Colonial Era Britain? Yeah, exactly.

All the trappings and johnny-come-lately “comforts” that we’ve drizzled in front of the cameras and the locked out aid workers and lawyers is so much chocolate sauce on a mound of shit for all it matters.

Not that this obvious context seems to matter for Robert Johnson’s desperate “no, no, conservatives you are right to hate the most obvious victims of your obscene war crimes” bullshittery.

the overriding philosophy on base these days is to treat the detainees really well. Compliant detainees enjoy a selection of six balanced meals, 25 cable TV channels, classes, and an array of electronic gadgetry and entertainment. I’m talking about a Nintendo DS for every compliant detainee, plus Playstation 3 access with a library full of video games.

Conditions at Guantanamo are absurdly good for the simple reason of getting the media to leave them alone. This is the White House’s best option for making the controversy go away, since closing the detention center has proven impossible. It’s not a perfect option, seeing that Guantanamo is insanely expensive compared to every prison in the world, but that’s where we are.

A)Bullshit on the same crap they try and pull when claiming that our home-grown abusive hellhole prisons are somehow “luxury resorts for criminals”

B) Bullshit on “we’re a happy fun factory now that everyone is pretending we don’t exist and we no longer give a fuck about even pretending we’re seeking to end our continued war crimes”.

C) Even if true, how would that even begin to matter? They are denied their homes, their families, their lives. And they are kept in perpetual indefinite and extremely illegal bondage because our country doesn’t want to admit they ever existed, that they were ever wronged, or are at all owed a life debt (not to mention immediate freedom to whatever country they want and earnest apologies) by our government for all they have suffered. Even if their lives were an endless parade of fine cuisine, luxury entertainment, ivy league education, and constant sexual relief from the attractive appropriately-gendered person(s) of their choice, how the fuck would it at all mean fuck all to that central flaw?!? How would it all make up for the fact that the US’s stated purpose with regards to them is to “make them go away” from being discussed as an issue.

Maybe this might be one of the main reasons that the Gitmo detainees have so given up on life that they see death as a welcome release to their daily hell and why the Gitmo staff have given up on even trying to come up with bullshit to defend why they are working so hard to keep them alive against their will anymore.

But nice to see that even when conservatives are talking about the most obvious and regrettable victims of their policies, they still can’t resist painting them as some over-entitled fat cats sucking at the public teat in “undeserving” fashion.

But hey, as I noted up above, IT’S ALWAYS fucking PROJECTION!

It continues on with some more obvious self-serving bullshit, so I’ll skip straight ahead to the final stream of piss on the beaten and humiliated illegal prisoner.

Detainees read the news, talk to family at home, and have cable, they see what everyone else does. When they saw Obama failed to mention the camp in his inaugural address, they noticed. The last bit of hope maintained by many began to fade. They needed control and attention to get back in the news.

“They use our religion as a shield and a weapon,” Zak tells me.

Yes, a series of tragic figures, aware of their imprisoning country’s apathy to them, were made aware that there is not even the slim promise of hope. That they are truly abandoned to a life of hell because no one seems to care enough to risk angering the violent bully that is the US and stand up for the powerless. They were going to be forgotten and beaten and lost and possibly even just “dealt with” and there is literally nothing they can do to stop it.

The only power left to them was the ability to choose their own end and try and bring some final attention to their plight and what harm happened to them as they prepare to exist this world in final protest in the exact way that Gandhi had been prepared to do.

And the oppressive authority’s “see we have one of the sand niggers too” mouthpiece’s only response to this is “WHAT ABOUT THE OPPRESSORZ!” How poor America and Gitmo are being “hurt” by having media attention brought to the detainees’ suffering. How poor America is being victimized by these self-destructive victims daring to “shield” themselves from abuse and use their “weapon” of self-mutilation to hurt America… in public opinion.

Because somehow the prisoners forced America to abuse them and illegally lock them up without trial or possibility of trial. Because somehow the prisoners forced America to torture them and turn America’s name into an international synonym for unrepentant war criminal. Because somehow the prisoners are forcing America to refuse to release them. Or make them look bad to the handful of media that even pretends to care. Because somehow they are forcing America to continue to mistreat them and drive them to a point where suicide appears preferable to continued pain.

This is somehow all their fault.

Because if we actually dared acknowledge whose fault it really is, some personal responsibility might lightly splash on the conservatives who have done everything in their power to destroy these various people’s lives.

And nothing, literally nothing is too underhanded in service to preventing that.

As Robert Johnson aptly demonstrates here.


‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. I once wrote a play about a group of Red Cross/Crescent Ninjas who worked to rescue the Gitmo detainees from their hell. Man, do I fucking wish that they were real. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


 

Comments: 247

 
 
 

Allow me to be the first to proclaim PENIS.
.

 
 

I wonder what poor Zak’s actual name is.

 
 

While indefinite detainment without trial may be morally offensive…

Does anyone else picture the author making air-quotes when he says this?

Is “morally offensive” the new “politically incorrect” for the RWA set?

 
 

I hope all the Boston Sadlies are okay in regards to the bombing. Keep safe, everybody.

 
 

If he thinks Guantanamo is cushy wait ’til he sees the FEMA camps.

 
 

Oh God, it is ye olde asymmetrical warfare bullshit. “See how the fiendish people (whom we have at our complete mercy) violently attack us by killing themselves!”

In a while we’ll be hearing that the prisoners need to stop with this evil and senseless dying of old age.

But first, there are pants to be shat over Boston. NYP has stepped up to the plate with exaggerated death counts and an outright lie that a Saudi national is in custody. Even though BPD has said “Nuh-uh,” I am sure the Chicken Shit Chicken Fuckers have banged out long screeds that will provide amusement for months to come.

And then there is Alex Jones, who has blamed the government.

 
 

Off topic already, but I had to share this bit of doubtlessly unintentional irony:

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But, hey, if Robert Johnson’s own son were in Gitmo, then…

 
 

“They use our religion as a shield and a weapon,” Zak [the Iraqi translator] tells me.

Unprecedented! I bet they use it as a religion, too … I mean this is redundant. If we looked at how Zak uses Islam, we might find him to be selective, opportunistic, or whatever he’s charging the detainees with. But Zak would have fewer excuses, since he’s not under comparable duress. And we won’t look at how Zak uses Islam, because he’s not under a microscope indefinitely.

 
 

If Obama wants to be the guy left holding the bag for all this, instead of the guy who shut it down, all he’s got to do is stick with his present course. That never occurs to him? Oh well.

 
 

“Because if we actually dared acknowledge whose fault it really is, some personal responsibility might lightly splash on the conservatives who have done everything in their power to destroy these various people’s lives.”

They needn’t worry. I clicked a link at “Anti-War.com” and it took me to an article on the sharp devolution in the mental and character state of today’s soldier. One could, I think, with a smidgen of justification, might want to look at, first, the military’s recruiting practices, and second, the uses these men (and women) are put to once they are in.
Nope, not at ATC! Commenters immediately informed me that the Nation of Islam have taken over the Quartermaster positions and control the Army from their stores, and gays and lesbians are running riot over the Officers and terrorising the straight, white enlisted man.

 
 

Nope, not at ATC! Commenters immediately informed me that the Nation of Islam have taken over the Quartermaster positions and control the Army from their stores, and gays and lesbians are running riot over the Officers and terrorising the straight, white enlisted man.

jeeze…the discrimination against the white man will never end…poor guys…

 
 

The fact is, muslims need to be deported from the USA.

 
 

While indefinite detainment without trial may be morally offensive…

My gob is well and truly smacked. May be morally offensive? May? There are no words for the gargling effrontery of this.

Commenters immediately informed me that the Nation of Islam have taken over the Quartermaster positions and control the Army from their stores, and gays and lesbians are running riot over the Officers and terrorising the straight, white enlisted man.

Well, of course. Wasn’t that the cunning and secret plan?

And if that’s a real Gary, you’re a total tosspot with no more brain than a mollusc. And if you’re a fake Gary, just shut the fuck up – this is not the time to be trolling.

Hope all the Bostonian Sadlies, and all other Bostonians, are doing okay.

 
 

Robert Johnson went down to the Crossroads Festival.
.

 
 

Thanks Pupienus, all running buddies are safe and accounted for.

 
 

Haven’t you heard? One midnight, Robert Johnson met the Prince of Darkness at a crossroad and sold his soul to gain the power to make me weep at his prose…or scream, or throw things against the wall.

(Others say that this was an older story told about Sun House, but he died long before Richard Perle was born.)

Lenny Bruce, in his junky narcissism and self-exculpation—but partially true nonetheless—put it succinctly as, ‘American society will cripple you, then make fun of you for limping*.’ The Right love this, with no better example than the U.N., whose weakness they deride even more frequently than they ensure.

*Viz http://www.subgenius.com/bigfist/ears/soundz/02HOLE/CASTOFF.wav

 
 

Sweet, sweet CNN . . .
Top story under
REACTION TO BOSTON BOMBINGS
is “Obama doesn’t say ‘terror'”.

You know who else doesn’t say “terror”? Jesus, that’s who. And the freaking Bible mostly uses “terror” to describe God.

 
Bozo the Cocksucker
 

Do you really fucking need the President to use the word “terror” about a fucking bombing? Isn’t it fucking obvious?

 
 

Also, too: Watch the right-wing press run the fuck away from “terror” if the bastard behind this turns out to be yet another white supremacist “lone wolf”.

 
 

if we Ran Siberia, we’d be Arguing it Was Filled with Ski Lodges?

Not “ski lodge”, Cerberus. “Dacha”.

 
 

“When I visited Guantanamo earlier this month, it was hard not to see things from the military’s point of view.”

Well, sure, “Bob Johnson”, I’m certain it’s easy to adopt that point of view while you’re gobbling every uniformed cock in sight.

 
 

Remember kids, in wingnut Merica paying taxes is horribly oppressive and just like slavery, but indefinite detention is super-nice and luxurious because there’s cable TV to watch between torture sessions there!

 
 

How many PS3 games are in Arabic or Pashtun, anyhow?

 
 

indefinite detainment without trial may be morally offensive

You know what would be even less morally offensive than indefinite detainment withou trial?

if Robert Johnson were to EAT SHIT AND DIE.

 
 

To the best of my ability to decode it, being the Party of Personal Responsibility means holding the Clenis personally responsible for everything bad that happened in-or-to MURKA NUBBER WUN! between August 21, 1992 and August 9, 2007, at which point bad things become the fault of Barack HUSSEIN Obama until further notice.

 
Helmut Monotreme
 

Jeez. Magnitude 7.8 earthquake in Iran near the Pakistani border. That can’t be good.

 
 

The quake is very not good, dozens already reported dead. It also will likely cause some unwell critter to declare it is proof that evil Mooslims were responsible for the bombing in Boston because our Mean Sky Penis – I mean God – is bigger than theirs.

 
 

I bet Grand Theft Auto is hugely popular among the inmate population.

 
 

“jeeze…the discrimination against the white man will never end…poor guys…”

I tried shoe polish, and burnt cork, but I think this new organic-walnut skin dye will finally enable me to pass. Privilege, ease and power, here I come!

And today, I’m pretty sure that “Iko Iko” by the Dixie Cups is one of the best records ever made.That little “oh-oh knocks me out every time!

 
 

REACTION TO BOSTON BOMBINGS
is “Obama doesn’t say ‘terror’”.

uh, yeah…one of the smarter guys and i believe some police types said, ‘uh, let’s not call it terrorism right off the bat because of the political and ideological connotations that word brings…we don’t need more shit going down because a buncha rednecks want to go after the muslins who are, obviously, the only people that ever commit terraism…’

 
 

REACTION TO BOSTON BOMBINGS
is “Obama doesn’t say ‘terror’”.

Blah fucking blah. Bodies not even cold yet and some fuckers try to score points. SHUT THE FUCK UP.

 
 

If it turns out to be some white dud there will be many feats of derring do by the professional butthurtists.

 
 

But, hey, if Robert Johnson’s own son were in Gitmo, then…

Or Johnson himself, if he thinks it’s such a fucking spa. Let him luxuriate there for awhile, the longer the better.

 
 

I don’t understand how not using the word “terrorism” is a bad thing; as noted above, it seemed wise (though not crucial) not to say it. In any case, Obama has since said (more or less) that anytime someone sets off a bomb in a public place, it’s obviously terrorism. I can sympathize with the admin for not wanting to explain that some people think “terror” means “muslim” ergo “I should kill a brown person” in retaliation for Boston. I imagine that intel and law enforcement do not welcome a flood of hot tips along the lines of “I saw a bearded man with a turban!”

 
 

Third Yorkshireman: We used to dream of living in Abu Ghraib, it would have been paradise to us.

Fourth Yorkshireman: We got evicted from our Abu Ghraib, we had to go live in Gitmo.

First and Second Yorkshiremen: Looooxury!!!

 
 

According to Salon, Alex Jones has proclaimed it a ‘false flag’ operation by the administration. Not gonna go look so I don’t get all smashy.

 
 

He did that yesterday, almost immediately after it happened. Some Infowars asshole asked the governor about it at the press conference. When it comes out who really did it will Jones et al be ignored forever? I might get religion if so.

 
 

He did that yesterday, almost immediately after it happened. Some Infowars asshole asked the governor about it at the press conference.

I posted a comment about that over at Rumproast. Here’s the press conference. It’s the first question asked of the Governor (just after 10:20 if the link doesn’t take you straight to that point). A bit hard to hear, but the douchiness is clear. Guv’s response was perfect. And I loved the “oh fuck you, you fucking fuck” look on his face as he listened/answered.

 
 

I wonder what poor Zak’s actual name is.

Probably Gary Stu.

Here’s echoing all the expressions of sympathy for Boston-area Sadlynaughts. Hope all are well.

 
 

Back in 2005 or 2006, whenever Guantanamo became public knowledge, my opinion was that if they weren’t our enemies when they were picked up (and we already knew that at least some were classic wrong place, wrong time), they surely were by then, and would become more so the longer we (illegally and immorally) kept them. I said we should put on our big-kid pants and release all of them with handsome parting gifts and heartfelt apologies, and the sooner, the better. That went over like a lead balloon, and I found some surprising (to me) people were buying what the Bushies were selling wholesale. Changed my opinion of a number of co-workers. Confirmed it for others.

 
 

They needn’t worry. I clicked a link at “Anti-War.com” and it took me to an article on the sharp devolution in the mental and character state of today’s soldier. One could, I think, with a smidgen of justification, might want to look at, first, the military’s recruiting practices, and second, the uses these men (and women) are put to once they are in.

Moral waivers increased dramatically under Dubya.

 
 

Moral waivers increased dramatically under Dubya.

Oh how I remember that. You’re a rapist? Hey, no problem. Murderer? Well, I guess that’s okay too. Homo! GTFO!

 
 

It would ruin the morale of the unit if your comrade wasn’t a dangerous heterosexual.

 
 

Moral waivers increased dramatically under Dubya.

Yeah, I remember that. Thought it was an outstandingly bad idea. I mean we had some horrific shit being done by US soldiers without “moral waivers,” what might it have been like with them?

As for Pup’s point about not allowing teh ghey, a couple things, one serious, one snarky:

Serious: The “moral waivers” put those who chose to serve and not Tell at extra risk, as (IMO), those getting in under the waivers would probably be somewhat more inclined to see gays as “safe” targets for their violence.

Snarky: So, since being homosexual wasn’t waived under the “moral waivers,” this meant the US military didn’t consider homosexuality a moral failing, as so many of the pearl clutchers seemed/seem to?

 
 

Christ.

Saw on Crooks & Liars that Bill O’ Reilly went all ballistic that The Great Usurper didn’t use the word “terrorism” last night. Of course, he was apparently talking to Peter King (R- Green-Baiting Dumbass) so it was rather to be expected.

I’ll be amazed if this wasn’t WOOOOLVERINES!!! that did this. Boston, Tax Day, too much of a coincidence for me.

 
 

since being homosexual wasn’t waived under the “moral waivers,” this meant the US military didn’t consider homosexuality a moral failing, as so many of the pearl clutchers seemed/seem to?

The military has a long history of looking the other way regarding homosexuality when it needed cannon fodder. Don’t ask, don’t tell, just die.

 
 

Mother rapers, father stabbers….

 
 

Bonus Alison Brie.

She’s so cute when she’s mad.

 
 

The Great Usurper didn’t use the word “terrorism” last night
How will you know to fear fear itself without the official reminders?

 
 

Bonus Alison Brie.

Cheesy.

 
 

Snarky: So, since being homosexual wasn’t waived under the “moral waivers,” this meant the US military didn’t consider homosexuality a moral failing, as so many of the pearl clutchers seemed/seem to?

On the contrary, I conclude the military sees or saw homosexuality as moral failing par excellence [sp.]
Q: is he gay? — A: damnably, unwaivably so!

I seem to recall they were studiously ignoring white power tattoos and shit like that.

 
 

Robert Johnson went down to the Crossroads Festival.

It’s hard to tell, it’s hard to tell, when all your wingnuttery’s in vain.

 
 

It’s hard to tell, it’s hard to tell, when all your wingnuttery’s in vain.

If I was a rhymin’ man, I might be able to make something outta Karl Rove’s Crossroads GPS outfit. (Does anyone else think that sounds more like a nav unit for your car than a PAC?)

 
 

Look who just got (more) famous!

I hope she won’t forget us little people now.

 
 

Really too busy now to stop and post anything, but OMG, Cerb, that’s one epic rant.

I need a cigarette, now.

It was that good.

 
 

Wasn’t there somebody, I forget who, who said “If it isn’t one thing, it’s another”. It might have been “one damn thing” . But that’s what it’s like.

 
 

Some Infowars asshole asked the governor about it at the press conference.

My wife had the press conference on TV while I was dropping off to sleep. Sounded like the guy kept it up too, trying to interrupt everybody else’s questions while the governor made a point of ignoring him. This whiny voice kept droning in the background. Alex Jones must be so proud of himself.

 
 

Sounded like the guy kept it up too, trying to interrupt everybody else’s questions while the governor made a point of ignoring him.

The Infowars guy knows his audience. Nevermind trying to learn what’s going on (and I know, the informational content of these pressers has been minimal). Don’t wait for info. Begin at once to hammer away at some angle that’d sound more appropriate coming from a psych’s couch or a rubber room than an important press conference.

Alex, if that really was you here, before, re: the twin towers nonsense: I was too gentle. Go fuck yourself, you’re a blight.

 
 

Wasn’t there somebody, I forget who, who said “If it isn’t one thing, it’s another”. It might have been “one damn thing” . But that’s what it’s like.

It was a Gahan Wilson cartoon, but I’m having no luck Googling it.
.

 
 

Ine of my nephews used to send me links to infowars a few years ago but hasn’t in a long time. I’m hoping he outgrew it.

 
 

It might have been “one damn thing” . But that’s what it’s like.
It was a Gahan Wilson cartoon, but I’m having no luck Googling it.

I remember it as a Mad cartoon, illustrating “a case of the screaming habdabs”, “one damned thing after another”, and a few other Adams-family-themed phrases. Could be wrong.

 
 

Paul Coker Jr. used to do pieces like this for MAD:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_HR3JtqIfTiE/TG27Kcgmy4I/AAAAAAAABkQ/-IkpWS1AXes/s1600/Paul+Coker+Jr.jpg

I’m not sure he if did a “one damned thing after another” though.

 
 

It just makes me think of Roseanne Roseannadanna.

 
 

It just makes me think of Roseanne Roseannadanna.

IIRC, her shtick was, “It’s aaaaalways something. If it’s not one thing, it’s another.”

 
 

Says an officer for a “major regional airline.” Not the Major. Nor is it Pat Smith who used to write the Ask The Pilot column at Salon. Dunno if he still does, haven’t read it in ages.

 
 

Our government is all conservative, Cerb.

For instance, Obama merely wanted to transfer Gitmo to the states…he was never going to let any innocent people go.

And torture, you say? Our Administration is all over it!

I understand the desire to blame wingnuts for all our problems. They’re stupid and it’s cathartic, like getting the band back together.

But we’re being screwed over by the right-wing elephant who calls himself a Democrat in the room at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

And like a spouse trapped in an abusive marriage, the response by most of “The Left” is to attack anyone who dares point out the obvious.

“Grow the fuck up!” “The Lesser Evil!” “The GOP made him do it!” “That’s not lipstick on my husband’s shirt, he cut himself shaving…and I hate you for pointing it out!”
~

 
Helmut Monotreme
 

Thunder,
I thought your insistence on emphasizing the mendacity of the current administration was tiresome and counterproductive during the election season. I still believe that despite the many shortcomings of the Obama administration, that a Romney administration would be a nightmare.

But, now you are right. Now is the time to hold the administration’s feet to the fire and try to make some of the promise ‘hope and change’ happen. Now is the time to fight all of the delays, denials and ‘business as usuals’ that keep the injustices and evils of the previous administration humming smoothly along. I didn’t vote for Obama so he could keep Guantanamo open and continue incarcerating innocent people. I sure as hell didn’t vote for him to extend the illegal occupation of Afghanistan and Iraq. I didn’t vote for him to keep using the PATRIOT act or to shelter torturers. I sure as hell didn’t vote for him to empower those god awful SOPA and CISPA bills. So yes, fuck the cowardice of the current administration. Screw its willingness to compromise at the expense of the citizens on behalf of big money and big business.

 
 

On a brighter note:

It’s a PENIS

 
 

It’s a PENIS

Except most people on the internet use “it’s” when it should be “its.” My spellchecker kept correcting my correct its to incorrect it’s until I turned it off.

Don’t have a PENIS. Guess I’ll have to come up with something else. So to speak.

 
Not Gary Ruppert
 

Not OT: So, Asa Hutchinson was on the radio box today talking about the US torturing people. Early in the interview he started a sentence with “The fact is,”.

 
 

Also, too: Watch the right-wing press run the fuck away from “terror” if the bastard behind this turns out to be yet another white supremacist “lone wolf”.

I stupidly just friended one of my RWNJ cousins*. He literally posted a meme picture of the Boston bombing with BENGHAAAAZIIIII! I thought that was a myth.

I gave him shit for it, given how many of us in the family live in Boston. Cow fucker.

*He’s either my grandfather’s brother or his nephew, like it fucking matters … technically the relations that lived closest to the explosion are his in-laws, my blood (well, not the wife), but then again my sister was nearby too, and that’s his blood, and we share the same name, so he can STFU.

 
Helmut Monotreme
 

Someone on my facebook feed posted a stupid picture with the twin captions: Bombing = blame bomber, Shooting = blame guns.

The stupid burns. We’d blame bombs too if they were as easy to get as guns. And no one is letting mass shooter off the hook with a smile and a shrug and a “boys will be boys”.

 
 

OBS wrote: I posted a comment about that over at Rumproast. Here’s the press conference. It’s the first question asked of the Governor (just after 10:20 if the link doesn’t take you straight to that point).

Win.

 
 

But we can blame guns for suicides and family annihilation killings just like we blame alcohol and cell phones for impaired and distracted driving. Because all of these risk factors make it very, very easy to do something impulsive with deadly consequences.

By contrast, it’s tougher to kill yourself with pills (and most suicide survivors don’t try again, note I said most, so Kurt Cobain is not “the exception that proves the rule”, he’s just in the statistical minority who keeps trying until they succeed), a sober person who is impaired has a better (if imperfect) handle on their impairment than someone who’s been drinking, and a pen and notepad on your dash doesn’t buzz at you to tell you that your friend replied to your note so read it and answer it NAO. (In retrospect, those sharper image pen and notepads for your dash were probably a stupid idea! But probably a lot less popular than cell phones.)

Also, fuck the NRA for moving the Overton window. Had a dumb supervisor the other day tell a coworker that it was a-okay for a member of the public to brandish an illegal knife in a public place. Because FREEDUMB. The supervisor wasn’t a RWNJ.

 
 

Now, to be fair, some family annihilators just suffocate their victims, but most seem to involve guns. I think the gun itself starts to prey on some people’s minds.

Like the Entwhistle case. Dude was never violent in England, but he didn’t have any frigging access to guns. In the US he got really depressed but his FIL took him shooting and eventually he sneaks into FIL’s house, steals a gun, and kills his wife and child. In the UK those guns would have been locked up at the shooting club.

I’ve noticed that a lot of times murderous or rapey kooks like to justify themselves Clockwork Orange style by blaming others for making it so easy for them to steal a weapon/hurt somebody/etc. I WILL PUNISH YOU FOR TRUSTING ME LIKE MY ABUSIVE PARENTS PUNISHED ME FOR TRUSTING THEM. No, that’s a lie, my parents are the best in the world, they made me who I am today!

 
 

Boring purity troll is boring.

 
 

Sorry for boring you. The coffee hadn’t kicked in yet. Or maybe it had. Anyway, I’m not trolling.

 
Helmut Monotreme
 

Eh. I think the Bitter Scribe was probably talking to me or thunder. unless, their threshold for ‘purity trolling’ is set mighty low.

 
 

I thought Thunder was the Proud Resident Purity Troll In Chief™©® around these here parts. As an Obot&hitler;, my taking of her crown would be one of those “The wrong team left town” things.

I will totally cop to boring people. I think I need one of those apps that says “are you sure you want to post this wordy, repetitive, stream-of-consciousness wankfest?” before I hit OKAY OKAY MUTHERFUCKA YES EVERYONE MUST ENDURE MY PRESHUSS THOTS

 
 

What happens when you cross OBS with BBBB?

 
 

It was Thunder, as if he cares.

And skullfuck the filibuster.

That is all.

 
 

What happens when you cross OBS with BBBB?

The Intertronz: ALL YOURS, NAO.
.

 
 

It looks like you are trying to cross the streams. Are you sure you want to do that? (Y / N)

 
 

North Mississippi Medical Center Tupelo Mississippi fired banned me after accidentally discovering refrigerator full of body parts

So THAT’s where they got to!

 
 

Hands and limbs and shit removed in surgery goes through the morgue. When I was the Diener, a standard stunt was to ask visitors if they needed a hand while extending a plastic wrapped hand. “Cost and arm and a leg” jokes were not uncommon.

 
 

Wow, the ricin guy sounds nuts: https://sites.google.com/site/paulkevincurtis/http://www.ripoffreport.com/political-cover-ups/north-mississippi-me/north-mississippi-medical-cent-z8efd.htm

Skimming quickly through those links, I suspect Mr. Curtis believes that “nonprofit” means “not ever making money on anything, evar.”

 
 

Wow, the ricin guy sounds nuts

I used to be stationed in that part of Mississippi. They’re all nuts as far as I’m concerned.

When I left Mississippi I stopped at the state line and burned rubber across it.

 
 

I used to be stationed in that part of Mississippi.

Yeah, the South does seem to have a disproportionate number of military bases. Why is that? The weather?

 
 

“Grow the fuck up!” “The Lesser Evil!” “The GOP made him do it!”

To be fair, ITTDGY, when looked at from this side of the pond it seems as though liberals and progressives have fuck-all real choice in the US. Your setup prevents the growth of third (and fourth and fifth) parties, and there are many other problems which basically force voters to always choose the lesser of two evils, at least until those problems with your system are redressed.

But I live in a country that has compulsory voting (on a Saturday, no less), proportional representation for both House and Senate, paper ballots, and an independent Electoral Commission responsible for counting votes and apportioning districts. Maybe that makes me a little smug, but I think our system has many advantages over yours, and so Australian voters have a better chance of being adequately represented.

 
 

Alison, I would move there but my 14 foot Alumacraft probably couldn’t make it across the Pacific and your government is probably sick of sane yanks trying to escape the madness.

Sometimes I wish I was a doctor just because they are welcome anywhere.

 
 

Ha! John Stewart calls CNN “the human centipede of news”

Fucking perfect.

 
 

Yeah, the South does seem to have a disproportionate number of military bases. Why is that? The weather?

They needed to be occupied after the Civil War. Now, of course, it’s a major source of the federal government money they always whine about having to fork over (which is bullshit, of course).

 
 

Alison, I would move there but my 14 foot Alumacraft probably couldn’t make it across the Pacific and your government is probably sick of sane yanks trying to escape the madness.

Just harness a couple of saltwater crocodiles to it, and they’ll get you across the ocean. Got crocodiles on the brain today.

 
 

human centipede

I seriously regret googling that phrase.

And I thought Saw was horrific…

 
 

And I thought Saw was horrific…

The weird thing is that I’m pretty sure the director/writer of “Human Centipede” originally envisioned it as a p0rn (Rule 34 and all), but could only get the funding for it if he marketed it as a horror film.

 
 

Watch the right-wing press run the fuck away from “terror” if the bastard behind this turns out to be yet another white supremacist “lone wolf”.

The batshit insane extreme wing guiding lights of the American Right saying repeatedly on the record that anyone wanting to advance the narrative & go Full Taliban on some evil government target needs to act as a “lone wolf,” so as not to damage the GOP’s cred while they continue to crank the Crazy button to 11?

A MERE PECCADILLO, SILLY LIBZ.

“Bombing = blame bomber, Shooting = blame guns. “

Who can ever forget the heinous mass show trials of Glocks in the wake of Tuscon?
John Wayne Wept.

 
 

Via Reditt . . . West, TX explosion video, from just after the explosion, a couple drive toward the cloud and chat (for the first couple minutes):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ja9LF9k2Rjw

Part 2 is more amazing, though wrenching as they wander into the blast zone and everyone is in shocked or injured.

 
 

A MERE PECCADILLO

Imma pretty sure that a peccary / crocodile hybrid is not going to work.

 
 

Use an armadillo instead of a crocodile–that might be your problem right there.

 
 

Yeah, the South does seem to have a disproportionate number of military bases. Why is that? The weather?

Never figured out why someone thought Columbus, MS was a good place for a pilot training base. The Southwest has much better flying weather.

We were forever losing flying days due to fog in the winter and thunderstorms in the summer. Then we’d be working weekends to make up the lost time.

 
 

“Bombing = blame bomber, Shooting = blame guns. “

Yeah, nobody ever blames the shooters, what’s up with that? Anyway, it’s not like we have a law regulating explosives, right?

 
 

Anyway, it’s not like we have a law regulating explosives, right?

Yeah, but thanks once again to the NRA there is no tagging agent in gunpowder like there is in plastic explosives. So we have that slowing down the Boston investigation.

 
 

Yeah, but thanks once again to the NRA there is no tagging agent in gunpowder like there is in plastic explosives. So we have that slowing down the Boston investigation.

Fuh-huck, the NRA is genuinely evil. No hyperbole, just the facts, they are E-E-E-V-I-L.

 
 

Fuh-huck, the NRA is genuinely evil.

They are. I’m a gun owner and you couldn’t pay me enough to join the NRA.

 
 

Yeah, but thanks once again to the NRA there is no tagging agent in gunpowder

We have the NRA to thank for so much, don’t we? My original snark was that, thanks to that Star Trek episode with the Gorn*, simply everybody knows how to make gunpowder, so tagging it would be completely useless, therefore we shouldn’t do it.

While I was planning my deathless prose, however, it occurred to the paranoid/cynical part of my brain that, in addition to being a useful front group for arms manufacturers, the NRA might also be a front group for people planning/favoring armed rebellion (with considerable overlap between the groups. The arms manufacturers must be doing very well in places like Somalia).

*Yes, or Piper’s “The Gunpowder God,” or just about any encyclopedia, numerous books, and, of course, the internet.

 
Packers the Easygoing Governor
 

Wow, the ricin guy sounds nuts
Dude’s an Elvis impersonator.
Need I say more?

 
Helmut Monotreme
 

Elvis Grbac impersonators are much more level headed.

 
 

Psssst. OBS, there’s a Belgian (style) Beer Fest coming up soon.

 
 

Ever notice how Elvis impersonators never look like Elvis, but they all look like each other?

 
 

Ever notice how Elvis impersonators never look like Elvis, but they all look like each other?

No. Though I’m sure I must have, I can’t recall ever _seeing_ an Elvis impersonator, thank FSM. There may be an upside to memory impairment.

 
 

I’m a gun owner and you couldn’t pay me enough to join the NRA.

Even my right-wing father in law dropped out of the NRA after their last flare-up in the mid ’90s. He’s a hunter and lifelong gun owner and a conservative and he couldn’t take it anymore.

I can’t recall ever _seeing_ an Elvis impersonator, thank FSM.

Our band is opening for a Fleetwood Mac “tribute” band in June. This is an event I would never have been within ten miles of otherwise.

 
 

I’ll be amazed if this wasn’t WOOOOLVERINES!!! that did this. Boston, Tax Day, too much of a coincidence for me.

also, too…isn’t it also known as patriot day out there?

No. Though I’m sure I must have, I can’t recall ever _seeing_ an Elvis impersonator, thank FSM. There may be an upside to memory impairment.

omg…we had THE worst elvis impersonator who lived in town here…he worked part time at our pamida store which always made me want to say, ‘thank you verra much’ when he rang up my purchases…anyhoo, one night hubbkf and i got to watch him perform at one of the local bars which was having a karaoke night…dude was so awful he forgot the words to songs…and again, it was karaoke night…

 
 

Our band is opening for a Fleetwood Mac “tribute” band in June. This is an event I would never have been within ten miles of otherwise.

you have my sympathies…

 
 

dude was so awful he forgot the words to songs

So he was impersonating Elvis’ later years, then?

 
 

Caveat on gunpowder – it’s easy to find the components; not as easy to get proportions right.

Of course, someone who would know those would be the militia survivalist types, which see my original comment.

And Ricin Guy – anyone else get a distinct “schizophrenia” feeling from his writing?

 
 

Oregon Public Broadcasting sponsored the upcoming Pnink Floyd tribute band Brit Floyd. Teh Ho had some extra tickets (as he almost always does) so we’re going. It is reported they are pretty good.

 
 

Brit Floyd is playing here this weekend. I considered going, but as I’d just spent a lot on Crosby, Stills and Nash tickets I had to pass on B Floyd. I certainly wouldn’t pass on it if I had free tickets. From what I’ve seen they’re pretty good with the music and go all out with the lasers, lights and all the other showy stuff.

 
 

<i.And Ricin Guy – anyone else get a distinct “schizophrenia” feeling from his writing?

i did click one of the links in his petition just because, you know…morbid curiosity…the ‘morgue’ shot shows an entire face next to some suspect looking ribs…it was kind of humorous…what a weirdo…

 
 

oh, hey…tagfail! what a surprise…

we are having a tornado drill…in the midst of a winter storm…how awesome…

 
 

Our band is opening for a Fleetwood Mac “tribute” band in June.

Back when I played electrickal guitar I always thought the guit slot in that band would be a great gig. One of the best rhythm sections ever in pop music, whacko girl singers and when you look out at the audience you’d see a thousand Stevie Nicks wannabes looking back at you. Two or three half chorus leads a night, some posturing and grimacing and Bob’s yer uncle.

 
 

What happens when you cross OBS with BBBB?

Well I’m actually already a Bantam Bad Bald Bastard myself, so there’s really no need to cross us. Not that there’d be anything wrong with that.

Psssst. OBS, there’s a Belgian (style) Beer Fest coming up soon.

Yeah, and I can’t go. I haz a sad.

 
The Dark Avenger
 

not as easy to get proportions right.

It is, however, pretty easy to fuck up when you do:

“Some have heated together sulfur, realgar and saltpeter with honey; smoke and flames result, so that their hands and faces have been burnt, and even the whole house where they were working burned down.”

That’s from a 9th Century Daoist text, according to the Wiki.

 
 

Wow am I out of touch with Left Coast brewing, I only recognized half a dozen of those breweries and I’ve had exactly one of those beers. I knew farmhouse and saison were all the rage with the hopnoscenti but whooee.

 
 

Wow am I out of touch with Left Coast brewing, I only recognized half a dozen of those breweries and I’ve had exactly one of those beers. I knew farmhouse and saison were all the rage with the hopnoscenti but whooee.

Yeah, there’s yet another “boom” of breweries being established, and lots of them are getting away from the “just make halfway decent beer and rake in the cash” model that worked for quite a while. Folks are establishing smaller, more niche-market breweries, which I think is a generally a great thing. Right now that seems to mean a metric shitton of “Belgian” and “Flanders” style breweries though, and quality is spotty so far. Don’t be surprised to not see many of those names still around in a few years.

 
 

we are having a tornado drill…in the midst of a winter storm…how awesome…

I think we broke the planet.

 
 

Did you see the Senate vote to allow reciprocity for concealed-carry (you, as a resident of a state with tough concealed-carry laws could go to a state with weak c-c laws, get a permit, and go back to your home state and c-c legally) got more votes than the watered-down, let’s- not-offend-anyone background check bill? It got 57 yeas, so short of that damn undemocratic rule, so it didn’t pass. It was S.Amdt. 719 to S. 649 (Safe Communities, Safe Schools Act of2013).

 
 

States’ rights means Massachusetts should be forced to follow Louisiana’s gun laws.

 
 

Sure, same farmhouse style fad is going on in the Northeast too, notably at this place and here. You’re right, of course, they’re not all going to last. Their beer is expensivo.

 
 

Put the missing ‘s’ wherever you want.

 
Helmut Monotreme
 

Yeah, there’s yet another “boom” of breweries being established, and lots of them are getting away from the “just make halfway decent beer and rake in the cash” model that worked for quite a while. Folks are establishing smaller, more niche-market breweries, which I think is a generally a great thing. Right now that seems to mean a metric shitton of “Belgian” and “Flanders” style breweries though, and quality is spotty so far. Don’t be surprised to not see many of those names still around in a few years.

I’d like to see a resurgence in local breweries that aren’t afraid to be local. Here in Wisconsin, nearly every town that was of decent size 100 years ago has a brewery. Or rather, a building that used to be a brewery since many of them couldn’t survive prohibition. Columbus WI used to have Kurths brewery, Machinery Row Bicycles in Madison is in an old brewery, I’d love to see those fantastic old brick buildings reclaim their former glory. I’d love to see newer towns put up some fantastic brick buildings and work with the farmers co-ops to get local barley and local spring water and make a little magic. Don’t get me wrong, I love imports and the variety of beers available today, I think we are living in a golden age of beer, really, but i’d supplement all of the Belgian style beers and german style beers with a bunch of new breweries that could create a southern Wisconsin style beer, or a Quad cities style beer too.

 
 

States’ rights means Massachusetts should be forced to follow Louisiana’s gun laws.

Funny how that works, innit?

 
 

I’d like to see a resurgence in local breweries that aren’t afraid to be local…

Agreed entirely. If I ever get around to starting my commercial brewery, that’s exactly what it’ll be.

For some reason lots of the wineries around here are satisfied with remaining local, but the breweries still have a tendency to want to get huge and start distributing and such. I’m sure it’d be great to get rich shipping IPA everywhere, but I don’t want to spend all my time running a factory making the same fucking beer style day after day.

 
 

Why do Elvis impersonators always go for Fat Vegas Elvis? Probably because you could put anyone, especially anyone with a gut, in a white sequined jumpsuit and people would at least know that he/she/it was trying to be Elvis.

 
 

I think we broke the planet.
pish! this whole extended winter thing we are experiencing only means that algore is fat!!! amirite…global warming…har har!

 
 

Some have heated together sulfur, realgar and saltpeter with honey; smoke and flames result

‘Realgar’ is a misprint for “Real Gary” (and totally not arsenic sulphide).

 
 

Alison, I would move there but my 14 foot Alumacraft probably couldn’t make it across the Pacific and your government is probably sick of sane yanks trying to escape the madness.

Hey, the Polynesians made it in canoes, so you stand a chance. At least yours has an engine (although you probably couldn’t carry enough fuel to get you all the way).

You, and indeed any Sadlies, are always welcome for a visit to check out good landing sites, although given that I live down at the bottom of the world, I understand that costs may be prohibitive (sob, choke).

 
 

Pupienus said,
April 18, 2013 at 20:40

Well done, New Zealand, well done indeed.

I’m with you. Watched the video. Cried unashamedly. At work.

New Zealand has always (at least since I’ve been around) been one of the most progressive nations on earth. We’re reasonable, but always look a bit backward compared to them.

 
 

Oh damn you, Pup and JA, I finally got around to watching that New Zealand video and I’m still snuffling. Maybe it was just the circumstances, but my gosh what a lovely song.

 
 

We’re reasonable, but always look a bit backward compared to them.

Hmph. Both of your countries look positively socializistic compared to the US of A. Of course, so does nearly everywhere else.

*pout*

 
 

I’ll see your pout and raise a whimper.

 
 

New Zealand is the only country in the world where home distillation is legal. Civilised.

 
 

We kicked all your asses in the same-sex marriage race. BOOYAH IN YOUR FACE!

CA NA DA! CA NA DA!

Woooooooo!

[Burp]

 
 

We kicked all your asses in the same-sex marriage race.

And you have a national anthem that people can actually sing.

 
 

I’m so jealous of the “singable national anthem.” Other things, too, like a health care system that works. Even if it’s imperfect, it’s better than ours. Not that that’s saying much.

 
 

Oh FSM, you people are making me depressed. I can’t even take solace that Al Franken is my senator since he can’t do a damn thing because of the fucking wingnuts.

I just wanna die.

fuck

 
 

I can’t even take solace that Al Franken is my senator since he can’t do a damn thing because of the fucking wingnuts.

I just wanna die.

fuck

right?!

hey bourbon enthusiasts! need a little info…i’ve done some gazoogling, but i could use a little more actual information…a donor gave us an i.w. harper bourbon decanter and i’m wondering if the thing is worth anything…the seal is still intact, but some of the bourbon has evaporated which is prolly due to cork shrinkage (ha)…anyhoo, he’s a porcelain dude with tophat, tails and a cane…bottle is imprinted with 1968 on the bottom and is in supergood condition…it’s a 12 month bourbon…any info at all would be great…i posted on a bourbon board earlier tonight, but since you yah00s know great and varied things, i figgered it was worth an ask…

 
 

And you have a national anthem that people can actually sing.

And doesn’t feature made-up words. I mean, what the fuck doesn “dawnzerly” even mean?

 
 

Um… any Sadlies go to MIT?

Bad shit’s going down.

 
 

sooooo…can just anybody move to australia or new zealand? i

 
 

bbkf, you need to drink that bottle immediately before the spores get into the atmosphere.

 
 

can just anybody move to australia or new zealand?

They let my people in so standards are evidently low VERY HIGH INDEED.

 
 

Wow. The State of Alabama will pardon the Scottsboro Boys today.

One hella week.

 
 

jesus h…hubbkf had msnbc on this morning watching the coverage…i swear i want to punch mika in her stupid fat head…she’s all, ‘we have terrorists living among us and we don’t even know! terrorists. living. among. us.’

oh…now she’s, ‘hey, even though their foreign born, let’s not jump to conclusions!’

i’m going to go shower now…and then crank some r.e.m…

Wow. The State of Alabama will pardon the Scottsboro Boys today.

mighty white of them…

also, i think maeve is bi-polar…srsly…

 
 

‘we have terrorists living among us and we don’t even know! terrorists. living. among. us.’

oh…now she’s, ‘hey, even though their foreign born, let’s not jump to conclusions!’

HELLO they set off bombs at a public event, they’d be terrorists whether they were foreign born or not.

 
 

HELLO they set off bombs at a public event, they’d be terrorists whether they were foreign born or not.

But if they are foreign born then all those people who tell us we can’t afford health care, public schools, police, fireman, postal service, roads, air traffic controllers, or any form of public transit can start pushing us toward another four trillion dollar war.

 
 

Obviously we must invade Chechnya.

 
 

I’m very sorry I didn’t get back here till now, and haven’t thanked everyone for the interesting and informative exegesis of the various permutations of the ‘one damn thing after another’ trope..
As for me, I’m sure I don’t know, but I don’t know a lot less now than I didn’t know before. Of course “I wish I knew now what I didn’t know then” as the song says.

 
 

“HELLO they set off bombs at a public event, they’d be terrorists whether they were foreign born or not.”

As I remember a lot of the 9-11 guys lived in the US for years. And yet we were unable to gruntle them to the point they wouldn’t do that. It’s sad, Lee, No?

 
 

Obviously we must invade Chechnya.

Yes, they do have oil after all. Although I’m sure Dick Cheney would have no trouble tying this whole business to Iran.

 
 

“Right now that seems to mean a metric shitton of “Belgian” and “Flanders” style breweries though, and quality is spotty so far.”

I live up here too, Beer Snob, and I know the skinny on high-carb craft beers. Ever go out behind those “farmhouses” and see the tailing piles, the run-off ponds (“settling” , may ass) and the ergonomic devastation suffered by consumers of the product? Some of them seem to have permanently impaired their kinesthetics! Ever see a Christmas Tree farm unfortunately sited downhill from a brewery? Every November and December, hundreds of the larger trees start disappearing. Why?

 
 

“Yes, they do have oil after all.”

Pilger seems to be saying that the George Bush War on Iraq (‘but Dad, you didn’t sack or loot, so we’re going back’) which was sold as an oil stealing war ran into a roadblock after “victory” when the big oil companies wouldn’t take the loot, because it would make oil too cheap!
Yet the war was sold to our military on the basis of looting the oil. Sorta tells ya something. Anyway, you can go to Pilger’s site and see for yourself, he’s got all the docs. It’s a hell of a story, and tells me our military no longer finds any objection to this task. If they ever did.

 
 

Obviously we must invade Chechnya.

ha, ha…i was originally going to remark that we have always been at war with chechnya…we really need to get together and combine our awesome intellects…

 
 

Obviously we must invade Chechnya.

That’s not how we roll. Normal procedure would be to use this as an excuse to attack whoever is next on our hit list. That would mean Iran or North Korea.

 
 

Ever see a Christmas Tree farm unfortunately sited downhill from a brewery? Every November and December, hundreds of the larger trees start disappearing. Why?

You have stumbled upon the conspiracy! The black helicopters are coming for you…

 
 

That would mean Iran or North Korea.

You think too small: Both!

 
 

OT – bbkf we have two feet of snow here and it’s still coming down, but mostly blowing around now.

 
 

OT – bbkf we have two feet of snow here and it’s still coming down, but mostly blowing around now.

we’re done with ours…got about 4-6 yesterday…worst part was the icy slush/ice combo on the highways…stilll windy today but sunny and 30 degrees…i think it’s summer!

 
 

Remind me never to ask 9th Century Daoists how to mix gunpowder.

BTW, waiting for The Usual Suspects to latch onto the fact that Chechen Hat Boy is described by one of his relatives as “Muslim, but not devout”. I hate to think what Atlas and Hot Air look like this week as it is.

 
 

You think too small: Both!

God gave us nukes for a reason, after all.

 
 

People with Twitter accounts should NOT take advantage of this once in a lifetime offer

How did Palin graduate HS? RT @johnhawkinsrwn Working on a Townhall column. “20 Questions Liberals Can’t Seem To Answer.” Suggest some.

 
 

I hope this doesn’t work.

How did Palin graduate HS? RT @johnhawkinsrwn Working on a Townhall column. “20 Questions Liberals Can’t Seem To Answer.” Suggest some.— Blue Texan (@BlueTexanTweets) April 19, 2013

 
 

Will the right wing blogosphere come to the conclusion that since two Caucasians were terrorists then all Caucasians must be terrorists and therefore all Caucasions must be either imprisoned or deported?

 
 

You think too small: Both!

God gave us nukes for a reason, after all.

Why’d He give one to NK, too? My guess: God is a jerk.

 
 

“20 Questions Liberals Can’t Seem To Answer.” Suggest some.

“Why is John Hawkins such an asshole?”

 
 

Apparently Herman Cain is tweeting about how Bostonians should all be armed:
http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2013/04/19/1895381/arkansas-lawmaker-mocks-boston-liberals-assault-rifles/

‘Cause taking a city full of scared people and adding high firepower ain’t gona go horribly, horribly wrong, nuh-huh.

 
 

God is a jerk.

Advantage: animists. Many gods are jerks but not all of ’em.

 
 

How did Palin graduate HS?

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! I’ll take “low-cut blouses and many trips to the principal’s office” IYKWIMAITYD.

 
 

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! I’ll take “low-cut blouses and many trips to the principal’s office” IYKWIMAITYD.

Ha ha ha! Yes, because she’s a chick so she must have just given BJs to get her diploma!

Plus ca change.

 
 

Y’know, I paged down Hawkins’ list and thought to myself “There are indeed some attractive women on this”. Then I got to #11, Man-Hands Coulter. And you know the top ten is all Palin and Haley and Crazy Pammy.John’s taste is all in his mouth.

 
 

“20 Questions Liberals Can’t Seem To Answer.” Suggest some.

“Why has John Hawkins never been seen in the same room as Count von Count?”

Hmmm, Photoshop project.

 
 

That two of my fb friends already posted smyt’s cat in a shark suit riding a roomba chasing a duck means either that it’s omnipresent or that I have friends like Smut.

 
 

Smut is omnipresent.

Also: white hat kid is now in custody.

 
 

RUN BRAINFART.EXE

How can wingnuts ever support Israel when Israelis practice hardcore socialism as national policy?

 
 

Sometimes the cat in the shark suit chases the duckling… and sometimes the duckling chases the cat in the shark suit.

 
 

awkward indeed. too bad that austerity is already bread and butter among those who deciderate on shit.

 
 

So I hear Russian terrorists just attacked America & nobody is calling them Russian.

EXCELSIOR! LOL!

 
Packers the Easygoing Governor
 

Russian, smussian,…some things sound really close, so WOLVERINES!!!11!

 
The Dark Avenger
 

Whatever Ann Coulter is, cis-woman, transgendered woman, she’s still a shithead for suggesting that the way to deal with political differences is murder.

That doesn’t mean she deserves being called ‘Mann-hands”.

However, she doesn’t engage in political discourse, but rather a kind of ranting usually indicative of mental problems.

 
 

The fact is, what happened in Boston is all the fault of the liberal. We should not let terrorist families into USA, we should deport them all to Mecca.

 
 

Yes, because she’s a chick so she must have just given BJs to get her diploma!

Let’s review the facts here, shall we:

Basketball star
It’s fucking Idaho
Subject can read/write, just chooses not to as an adult
Incurious
Likes to party
Major bully
Parents looking over her shoulder

I’m pretty sure there was enough of a dumb jock track to graduate at her high school as at many high schools. Plus, I’m sure she was skilled at terrorizing nerds into helping her cheat. She probably got indulged a lot, witness her notion she can bullshit her orals without even trying to cram.

I’m not sure sex appeal had nothing to do with it, but I’ve never even heard of a teenage girl sleeping with the principal (ew) and she wouldn’t have to to pass enough easy classes to graduate.

Palin strikes me as someone whose intellectual development stopped AT high school. When she went to college apparently the party was ON.

 
 

Why is everybody so crabby this morning?

 
 

http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2013/04/19/1895381/arkansas-lawmaker-mocks-boston-liberals-assault-rifles/

If this jeeenyus thinks the fists of an angry mush aren’t weapons of mass destruction, I challenge him to take a little Boston holiday and share his notions about Greater Boston’s punkitude, especially on the inside of a drinking establishment.

Go ahead. We’re great listeners.

 
 

I challenge him to take a little Boston holiday and share his notions about Greater Boston’s punkitude, especially on the inside of a drinking establishment.

Especially in Southie.

 
 

Who thinks courage comes from owning a weapon? And who thinks by shooting anonymous moving shapes from his window in the middle of the night he’ll do a better job than the cops? And this brave genius is armed.

 
 

As I remember a lot of the 9-11 guys lived in the US for years. And yet we were unable to gruntle them to the point they wouldn’t do that. It’s sad, Lee, No?

Fair enough, though the more we know about White Hat Fratty Bro, it’s less a question of gruntlement and more a question for forensic psychology.

His mother’s a crook and then both brothers (but not both sisters)? Thought I heard in the inheritance of psychopathic traits boys are more likely to inherit because of that lack of a copy for some genes on the Y chromosome, making them vulnerable to copy errors, whereas the XX is heterogeneous.

Psychopaths are often typed as superficially charming but lack close connections (because they don’t see the need for them), which seems to describe Dzhokhar pretty well.

Also reminds me of a certain person who was fired from two local police forces and then finally the bus company who was dirty as all get out yet struck people who barely knew him as friendly and normal and “the last person you’d think” who would: shoot a physically disabled mental patient in the face; drive around an impoverished ‘hood and throw rocks at the streetwalkers; go to jail for battery on a pregnant female.

 
 

Especially in Southie.

Yaaaa, FUCK Southie. Buncha bullyboy punks. Let him try that shtick in Allston. Or right Downtown. Or in the burbs. Ya, say that shit in Newton. Or Medford. Just try saying that on a street corner in Watertown. Punk, you’ll be lying on the ground getting battered with lacrosse sticks and people will be driving by. Then a beat up older car will pull up, the door will open and the driver will scream “GET A JOB!”

 
 

Christ, I thought “Man-Hands” was common usage here on S,N! ’cause it
s a Seinfeld reference and shit. I didn’t realize it had suddenly become some great anti-TG bigotry. I’ve know a bunch of LGBT folks in my life, and I bet they all would laugh at the reference.

How about “useless waste of DNA Coulter”? Does that work for you, Dennis? Or does that mean in your fevered imagination that I somehow hate geneticists?

 
 

If he says that shit in Dorchester, guarantee his body will never be found.

 
The Dark Avenger
 

You’re still equating her to a group of people you think are freaks, DA.

Gee, Dennis, you think it’s okay to suggest killing someone you disagree with politically?

The bigotry is ingrained in you.

And the hatred you have for libruls is part and parcel of you, Dennis.

 
 

You’re still equating her to a group of people you think are freaks

UWoDNA Coulter is a freak all on her own.

 
 

I think we are living in a golden age of beer, really

Now if we could only work on decriminalizing weed, we could have a golden age of bud

 
 

To be fair, Coulter sounds like the sort of person who has chosen to be inhumanely vile for money.

Calling her crazy is an insult to good crazy people everywhere. Not the mention the bad crazy people. Even my crazy mom, in her worst outbursts of vile vileness can’t keep up the hardcore, provocative sputum going for weeks and months on end like Coulter. Also, my mother tries to maintain a positive self image even if her notion of good, moral behavior is kind of like taking morality and standing it upside down in a jar of denture cleaner.

Of course, scratch Coulter and she’ll tell you that she’s morally pure because she never sets hands on anybody. You know, inciting other people to commit acts of violence and spewing hatred everywhere is just FWEEEDUMB OF S’PEACH and y’all are oppressing her for even suggesting that “responsibility” or “restraint” might come into it.

 
 

“Responsibility” and “restraint” are for liberals.

Nothing conservatives say motivates anyone else, ever, no way no how. No matter how outrageous or extreme.

 
 

He also posted a long, stirring Islamic propaganda piece focusing on Bashar al-Assad’s brutality in Syria. Images of dead children, the siege of the city of Homs and government soldiers humiliating civilian detainees (both dead and alive) feature heavily in the piece, titled “Those With A Heart.”

I don’t speak Russian or Syrian and have no way to judge the politics of this video, but judging by my own FB feed, I don’t think you can immediately identify the politics of a person by which side they took in the Syrian conflict.

This whole piece reads neutral but seems tendentious when you scratch beneath the surface.

They never say what Kuran quotes were on Tamerlan’s page. His “radical imam” was both misogynist and into jihad. And Tamerlan was a wife beater.

How many Christian murderers in the Heartland listen to “radical clerics” like Gothard and other Dominionists who are into, guess what, extreme patriarchy AND bringing about theocracy in the US. It’s like they go together or something! And many of them, guess what, engage in brutal domestic violence. Wow!

 
 

The younger Tsarnaev posted one of his final tweets at 7:04 p.m. Monday, just hours after the Patriots Day bombing. “Ain’t no love in the heart of the city, stay safe people,” wrote the man accused of planting one of the bombs that killed three people and injured 176 others.

Chilling. And more proof that It’s Always Projection. And victim-blaming.

 
 

What that stupid and irresponsible piece tells me is that they still don’t have the smoking gun to say, yes, Tamerlan is an angry jihadi with a grudge against the US and ties to AQ.

All they have is ‘renewed interest in religion and yes he hates Russians, kinda funny millions of American dumbshits will be calling him Russian now that he’s dead’.

Maybe Dzhokhar will tell us what the motivation was (rage at athletic organizations, rage at happy families, it seemed ‘cool’), or maybe he will tell a bunch of lies just like he did during the hours after the bombing.

 
 

Breaking News: Ooh. La. La.

Also: WHEW.

Can harvesting a motherlode of premiere-ratings platinum GET any easier?

Ask me again right after I get a wad of Kleenex & a Gauloises Blondes, honeybunch.

 
 

How many Christian murderers in the Heartland listen to “radical clerics” like Gothard and other Dominionists who are into, guess what, extreme patriarchy AND bringing about theocracy in the US. It’s like they go together or something! And many of them, guess what, engage in brutal domestic violence. Wow!

That very thought was going through my mind as I was reading that link.

And I know that they probably did get the right guy, but the general acceptance of his guilt is disturbing. If he and his brother weren’t the bomber(s), just behaving “suspiciously,” that would mean the real bomber(s) are still out there. Which is probably why everyone is so happy to accept their guilt. But we’ve been wrong before.

 
 

But we’ve been wrong before.

Oh, how could you possibly suggest such a thing?

 
 

just behaving “suspiciously,”

Including an eyewitness at the race who saw one of them put down and leave a bag right before the explosion, carjacking, engaging in a shootout with cops, and throwing explosives. Innocent until proven guilty and all, but it’s not like there weren’t reasons these guys were suspected of being involved.

 
 

Including an eyewitness at the race who saw one of them put down and leave a bag right before the explosion, carjacking, engaging in a shootout with cops, and throwing explosives. Innocent until proven guilty and all, but it’s not like there weren’t reasons these guys were suspected of being involved.

I didn’t have the TV on for most of the day, so I missed a lot of details, but as I recall, there was a bunch of stuff that came out as true that turned out to be mistaken. It was a chaotic time with high emotions (exactly what bombers would be going for). It could be the cops caught a lucky break, it could be the eyewitness was wrong. I don’t know.

As I said, they probably really are the bombers, and early childhood exposure to the horrors in Chechnya could be one of the factors contributing to them being able to do something so terrible. But quick, neat resolutions make me suspicious.

 
 

Now if we could only work on decriminalizing weed, we could have a golden age of bud

Which reminds me, happy 420 everyone!

 
 

The carjacking, shootout, and explosives were verified by several official speakers at at least two press conferences, including the final post-capture one. The eyewitness is how they first identified the older brother on the video, but there is video of both of them there walking together, stills of one at each bomb site and a still of one leaving after the explosion without a backpack anymore. This is just from the released stuff, too, there may be more that they didn’t release. The quick resolution is not suspicious if the two were careless enough.

 
 

If he and his brother weren’t the bomber(s), just behaving “suspiciously,” that would mean the real bomber(s) are still out there.

Sure. But unless a lot of people are lying, one of the victims was an eye witness to the bomber looking him straight in the eye, dropping the backpack right in front of him, and leaving. The bomb went off minutes later (blowing off this man’s legs).

That’s why there was that unconfirmed report swirling around that the BPD was looking for a guy in a sweatshirt and a backwards white baseball cap the day before the photos were released. They used that description to find him on the security camera footage.

 
 

I didn’t have the TV on for most of the day, so I missed a lot of details, but as I recall, there was a bunch of stuff that came out as true that turned out to be mistaken. It was a chaotic time with high emotions (exactly what bombers would be going for). It could be the cops caught a lucky break, it could be the eyewitness was wrong. I don’t know.

As I said, they probably really are the bombers, and early childhood exposure to the horrors in Chechnya could be one of the factors contributing to them being able to do something so terrible. But quick, neat resolutions make me suspicious.

No offense, but I think that smattering you picked up is misleading you now.

CNN came out with a report there was a dark-skinned male involved. This was after the media fail about the Saudi guy. BPD and FBI categorically denied the rumor and FBI, and not so very politely, sent out a STFU tweet.

Most of the info on the bombs was more or less accurate. Some cops and medical workers were talking to reporters off the record, plus there were visible pieces of evidence lying around. I don’t know about the claims about the origins of the components and I don’t know that we’ll know for some time.

The cops did catch a lucky break–after running the photos, though some people recognized the brothers, the brothers seem to have freaked out and called down the law on themselves by starting a disturbance in the middle of the night, gunning down a campus cop who may have been responding to that or another incident, then after tearing west, encountering cops again and shooting and tossing homemade grenades at them. The cops caught another break when a neighbor just outside their cordon zone noticed something off, investigated, and called police.

They are of Chechen ethnicity but have never lived in Chechnya. Their uncle stated that they did not experience the horrors of the Chechnyan war.

Don’t think anything was quick or neat about this case, but this week has reminded us that sometimes it’s evil, not good, that is dumb. Witness Conspiracy Theory Elvis who found out that a good CTer should never send crushed castor beans to goad, … er, encourage … uh, bully, that’s it, bully elected officials into action, lest the MIB darken his door.

 
 

It’s not supposed to last forever.

If “it” lasts longer than four hours, &cet.

 
 

Psychopaths are often typed as superficially charming but lack close connections (because they don’t see the need for them), which seems to describe Dzhokhar pretty well.

You name a kid after Timurlane, don’t expect him to grow up normal with *that* kind of role model.

 
 

No offense, but I think that smattering you picked up is misleading you now.

OK. I stand, er, sit corrected.

I just get all nervous and stuff when there’s a national howl for retribution after horror. Though I gotta say I regard the NRA as a terroristic organization, and would be very happy to see Mr. LaPierre and his owners standing trial. So I’m not immune.

I do think, though, that every effort should be made to ensure the trial is fair and the evidence as clear as possible. Both for the accused’s sake and our own. There will always be nutcases out there proclaiming “false flag,” “black helicopters,” and whatever else, but we need to make sure it’s as obvious as possible they’re full if it.

 
The Dark Avenger
 

Dennis’s mother won best of show at the Westminister show shortly after giving birth to him and his siblings.

 
The Dark Avenger
 

Yes, Dennis, I’m from a republic of the former Soviet Union, Muslim, and living on the East Coast.

 
 

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

 
The Dark Avenger
 

That’s probably the most intelligent thing you’ve written in years, Dennis.

 
Dzhokhar Avenger
 

That was an identity thief, Dzhokhar Avenger. They are prevalent here.

Yeah, quit trying to be me, Dark. I’m the only one, patent pending.

 
Dennis Butthurt Schlacter
 

This is such a beautiful morning!

 
 

“Dennis’s mother won best of show at the Westminister show shortly after giving birth to him and his siblings.”

I guess, I’m just gonna have to accept it; good breeding tells, every time. Oh well.

 
 

I have an announcement to make. Today is going to be a beautiful day!

 
Dennis Butthurt Schlacter
 

Get back to work, Dwight, and get off the iPad.

 
 

[…] Because that’s a great long-term strategy that has never been abused- oh, wait! […]

 
 

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