CERBERUS THIS IS MY BEAT

YOU ARE STEALING THE INTERNET FOOD FROM MY INTERNET CHILDREN’S INTERNET MOUTHS CERBERUS

(Okay, technically Salon and not Huffpo, but same deal.)

I don’t even need to scroll up to tell this writer is so white, she needs to use sunscreen just to get the mail.

May I use this as a self-description? I actually do need to use sunscreen just to get the mail. Yes. I am that white.

I also find that I need to turn the base down whenever my (African-American) wife drives our car for a long enough period to change the radio settings. I guess some stereotypes are true?

What war on women

Actually

No seriously, how the fuck is sending one’s kids to school an economic issue? The school bus arrives, you throw them on, maybe you drive them to school, or let ‘em walk and it’s kinda taken care of. Not exactly the grim concern on the minds of working women.

I think you are a bit wrong here. What if the school bus is late and by the time you finish waiting for the bus (a 5 y.o., for example, can’t wait for the bus alone) or you drive your kids to school (assuming you have a car) or take a city bus with your kids to school (if you don’t), you can’t get to work on time. And then you need to deal with child-care: if you can’t pick up your kids on time (because you have to stay late at work or you are stuck in traffic or the subway’s acting funny that day) from after school care, what happens then?

For working moms, schooling/day-time child care are actually big concerns (unless you are rich enough to afford a staff of full time nannies or some such). Heck, even for stay at home moms, they still have to worry about child-care issues and getting to the bus on time when everyone in their extended family dumps stuff on them to do (“you don’t have a job — why don’t you take grandma to the doctor’s?”) …

I don’t think it’s in our favor as liberals (who could propose some nice big-gummint solutions that would help out with how to get kids to school on time … jus’ sayin’ … wait a minute, am I too white to use that slang 😉 ) to wave away the issue of getting kids to school. Sure it’s not the biggest issue on anyone’s mind all the time, but it is an issue.

Cause she’s never had to struggle for anything in her whole fucking life or deal with want, with the painful stress of trying to make ends meet and deal with the huge expense of child care. If it weren’t for the biological process of pregnancy, one wouldn’t be entirely sure she noticed the impact at all.

HEY SHE HAD TO MOVE AROUND A LOT OF THINGS IN HER SCHEDULE SO SHE COULD FLY ACROSS THE COUNTRY TO RIDE HER HORSE!!! does that not count for anything?!?!?

Let me just dump a whole load of class trash on this joint: the idea of a distinction between working moms and housewives is a relic of house-proud middle-class, obsessed with distinguishing itself from the working poor by pretending they’re not human. If the lady scrubbing Ann Romney’s toilet has children, she (a) has to take care of them because if she’s married it’s probably to a man she rarely sees and (b) has to abandon them to her job at least some of the time to make sure Ma’am’s toilets are clean enough to eat out of, even though Ike made like the dog two hours ago. “My kid needs to make band class, ma’am” will result in “well, I need a maid who doesn’t gold-brick on me”.

I didn’t come up poor, but I came up spitting distance from it, and your options decrease pretty dramatically the closer you get.

No seriously, how the fuck is sending one’s kids to school an economic issue? The school bus arrives, you throw them on, maybe you drive them to school, or let ‘em walk and it’s kinda taken care of. Not exactly the grim concern on the minds of working women.

I think you are a bit wrong here.

also, too…lunch money, clothing, school supplies…and also, around here, kids have to pay a fee to participate in just about every extra curricular activity…and then, the kids are continually fundraising for something which means you have to buy: crappy fundraiser chocolate, semi-decent frozen pizzas, gift wrap, candles, fruit…it goes on and on…

No seriously, how the fuck is sending one’s kids to school an economic issue?

Well, that private school tuition adds up when you’ve got five boys, even if you can afford it like Mitt and Ann could.

“ALEC” DIRECTOR’S COMMENTARY: The script initially called for “dump a whole load of class trash on this bitch” but then we realized it was too ambiguous to pull off. I think we made the right call.

DAS-

Okay, I can see the argument. And certainly, child care in general and indeed, getting working hours that work well around school times (pretty much non-existent unless you work at a school are real issues.

But still, by her phrasing still a bit of a stretch and doesn’t help fix the 1 and a half actually on topic examples.

And ironically I did go back and forth about whether or not to include a form of what you wrote as ass-covering on that section, but decided it took too much out of the joke. Guess, I should have kept it in.

From the vastly underappreciated blog of Nancy Nall:

I don’t think it’s possible to express how little I’m interested in fighting the Mommy Wars again. Seriously. Do not want. To fight this. As wastes of breath go, only discussing which candidate you’d like to have a beer with ranks lower.

Been there, done that. Absolutely an argument without a point that brings out the worst in everyone. Won’t do it, can’t do it. Whatever works in your family is the right way to do it. Shut up about my choice, and I’ll shut up about yours.

Amen.

Also, Mee-Maw sure as shit isn’t retired and you couldn’t leave the kids with anyone at home at three in the afternoon and expect them to get to school on time, so yeah, pretty much all on the Self-Oriented Working Mom there.

Women have been working since time immemorial, and the agent of last resort in their children’s upbringing since time immemorial. Even domesticity has only ever consisted in idleness for classes of people for whom work has consisted in idleness. (The owning class, who ‘earn’ livings by being born.) The workplace revolution of the late 60s and early 70s did usefully wedge open many doors which had been previously closed to women, but it’s a small and fragile wedge.

The more useful discussion is in the culture encouraging women to subsume themselves into their children, as it once encouraged them to subsume themselves into their husbands. Ann Romney is firmly in the latter camp, but will play the former for the cameras – she’s Mitt’s husband but also Tagg’s mom. She stopped being Ann years and years and years ago.

The “mommy wars” frame is especially useful for the traditional function of getting upper-middle-class pwogs to shit all over the lower orders: working for a living makes you a greedy shrew and taking care of your kids makes you a worthless cow. Those who do both are tarred both ways and generally beneath contempt.

Ann Romney having the maid raise her kids is the epitome of hard work.

Silly Cerberus, the nannies raise the kids, the maids clean house and the pool boy keeps mommy happy.

If Mitt Romney is elected, Ann will be the only First Lady born this century to not have worked outside the home. It’s likely she’ll receive criticism for this and people may immediately dismiss her as being out-of-touch

Back up a little here. If Ann Romney was born in this century, I’m pretty sure that makes Mitt a felon.

Added an addendum to fix the one section up a little bit.

And I think the real elephant in the room that the “Mommy Wars” likes to cover up is how we as a society still aren’t fully on board with the notion that women are people rather than property. That taking care of a house isn’t just what “a woman does”, but rather something both partners need to be taking an equal share in. And that a woman’s psychological health is kinda important and not something caused by “not being a good enough wife or mommy”.

It is inflammatory, infuriating and just plain wrong. Ann Romney raised five boys — not for the faint of heart, I tell you.

Ya know, she never had to stay up at night, worrying that one of them might have been shot by a cop, or blown to bits by an IED.

I lie in bed at night imagining all the smart, hip outfits I would wear to my job.

I hear that Donna Karan is designing the new uniforms for Wendy’s.

I blame N__B and vs.
~

How dare you insult Ann Romney by undervaluing all the work she does! I was so shocked, I almost dropped my monocle!

Maybe it’s about time I took out the “Hitler” part of my screen name.

It is inflammatory, infuriating and just plain wrong. Ann Romney raised five boys — not for the faint of heart, I tell you.

From personal experience, anyone who has a choice and has more than three or four kids is a bad person, or at least has made a really, really stupid choice.

My grandparents raised four fuck-ups and one very difficult functional adult, and all they had with each other was the drinking, and then that stopped and their nest emptied out and all they had was a dried-out shell of a marriage and the pittance he retired on. And then they started drifting back into the nest, as burn-outs do, flying in and out of addictions and jobs and marriages, and worse coming to worst my grandpa’s lifetime of smoking tore apart his lungs – not cancer, but emphysema, a slow and predictable death, from which neither he nor she could escape, and which only made the loveless coldness of their twilight years all the more bitter and difficult.

I used to think my mom offered to kill me if I started smoking because of the emphysema, but now I’ve sort of begun to think she just wants as little as possible to remind her of her dad, who for being so goddamn smart made some stupid goddamn decisions – and whose twisted, stupid love was rewarded with twisted, stupid love in return.

But she stayed at home to raise her kids though, so hooray for house wives! Hooray for the middle class!! Hooray for white people!!! Three cheers for feminism!!! You go girl!!!

Back up a little here. If Ann Romney was born in this century, I’m pretty sure that makes Mitt a felon.

Nah, she rolled off an assembly line in ought-two. She’s not the first Ann Romney, she’s actually the Series Seven model. The first couple of production runs fell too hard into the uncanny valley to be paraded around in public.

Maybe it’s about time I took out the “Hitler” part of my screen name.

You know who also took “Hitler” out of his screen name?

You know who else stole comments I was about to type?
~

Changing screen names is theft.

Perhaps this will propel her to a greater understanding of the issue and why Hillary Rosen, despite being scum in other aspects in her life

Thank you for that, Cerb.

You know who also took “Hitler” out of his screen name?

OOooo I know this one!!

Hint: DEUTSCH, muzzerfocker!! Sprechen sie???!!!

Now, this might seem stupid, but so it is surely the reason why it proved wildly successful.

Like that old chink said, know your enemy.

She and husband Mitt have five children, all boys, born between 1970 and 1981.

Ann Romney has not been a stay at home mom for a long time.

Oh, yes, she – a working mother with several children – did.

I’m just feeling all fixyish this afternoon.

Oops, shoulda boldedized that stuff between the en dashes.

But, but, but don’t the Xristian Xrazies like to argue that moms working outside the home are FAILING at the mom job because they aren’t staying home taking care of the kids and the household? It’s not hard to find that argument being made on The Right and using as proof for their claim all the broken homes, thuggish and oversexed teens running wild, rap music, drug use, poor academic performance, general moral turpitude and tooth decay. If that’s not judging so called choices of certain women, then Hillary Rosen is Pope Benedict. Where’s the outcry and outrage? Oh yeah, IOKIYAR.

Last I heard, nobody who writes for the HuffPo gets paid, right? So I guess the article’s writer, Karen Mangiacotti, must be sitting at the kitchen table churning out drivel like this in an attempt to get some kind of a paid shtick, n’est-ce pas?

Well, let me offer you some free advice, honey— you’re never going to get a comfy seat aboard the wingnut welfare gravy train if you don’t learn to work a little dogwhistlin’ into your work…

WTF— you totally failed to mention Michelle O’Baby-mama!

And how about those Welfare Queens— they drive Cadillacs, too, just like Ann Romney. So suck on that, liberals!

I hate this issue. It’s fucking stupid.

Also, let’s raise a glass for the single parents (mostly moms) out there. NOBODY works harder than they do.

Well, let me offer you some free advice, honey—

Also; HuffPost. You’re doing it wrong. Bad springboard into the wingnut uneven bars.

If Mitt Romney is elected, Ann will be the only First Lady born this century to not have worked outside the home.

Although so poorly written as to be temporally confusing, Sadly, No:

Of all First Ladies born in the 20th century, only Barbara Pierce Bush did not work outside the home after marriage.

But of the other First Ladies who were born in the 20th Century, aside from the already well-known, they all did work:

Nancy Reagan, as we know, was an actress.

Rosalynn Carter did the books and accounting for the family business.

Betty Ford was a dancer and fashion model.

Pat Nixon did an amazing number of menial jobs, from cashier to telephone operator, janitor, pharmacy assistant, typing teacher, and film extra.

Ladybird Johnson worked outside the home AFTER she married Lyndon, buying a radio station and serving as its president.

Jacquie Kennedy was a newspaper photographer.

Mamie Eisenhower didn’t work outside the home, but she was also born prior to 1900.

Where’s the outcry and outrage?

Surely to clutch your pearls and gesture meaningfully towards the fainting couch, you have to care deeply and passionately about this fresh unprecedented outrage. Surely, this is true whenever someone does this strangely rehearsed series of motions, perhaps emitting “oh my stars and garters!” or “o tempora, o mores!” weakly, depending on social register of audience.

I haven’t actually heard Romney try and put forward a significant policy or legislative goal yet – unlike e.g. Ryan Plan, which has been flogged dishonestly but at least has been flogged. We perhaps missed the point of the Etch-a-Sketch metaphor – it’s not that Romney is going to suddenly start flip-flopping, because no shit, but more that he’s going to shake around and make strange, otherworldly noises and hope the children of the Beltway forget he’s just a plastic piece of shit you can buy in any drugstore for a dollar.

We shouldn’t forget that Ann drives a “couple of Cadillacs”.

UNINTENTIONAL DOGWHISTLE!

I demand a birth certificate and DNA test.

Although so poorly written as to be temporally confusing, Sadly, No:

You forgot Dolley Madison (1968-1849), White House tour guide, art historian, and time-traveller.

You forgot Dolley Madison (1968-1849), White House tour guide, art historian, and time-traveller.

Also the baker of all those tasty treats you see advertised on Snoopy specials.

I have decided that Snoopy is such a cool name I’m stealing it.

Also the baker of all those tasty treats you see advertised on Snoopy specials.

No, Dolly Madison was named after Dolley Madison, who was in turn named after Dolly Madison, which was in turn named after Dolley Madison, who – you get the idea.

How do you resolve the time paradox? One word: plastics. (Also how you make Dolly Madison treat-like items.)

Well, she’s certainly not a writer. Whether or not she got paid for this mess.

You forgot Dolley Madison (1968-1849),

How do you resolve the time paradox?

Just what I was wondering.

Romney was a “missionary” in France during the sixties? Really? France?! WHY?!

Just had to look that up

Romney evaded the draft by serving the Mormon church in France where he spent time in a Paris mansion that other Mormon missionaries described as a palace that featured a servant, a cook, stained glass windows, and pricey art. The mansion later became an embassy of the United Arab Emirates and is currently worth about $12 million.

http://www.politicususa.com/romney-insults-veterans/

I don’t know if this is true, but it would be irresponsible not to speculate. He recently gushed about how wonderful the days he and his wife spent in Paris were on the campaign trail. We all know how the base feels about France, right? He didn’t say he loved the trees in France, but he didn’t say he didn’t.

Romney is a very strange man.

Everybody do the Michigan Rag
Everybody likes the Michigan Rag
Every Mame and Jane and Ruth
From Weehauken to Duluth
Slide, ride, glide? the Michigan
Stomp, romp, pomp the Michigan
Jump, pump, hump the Michigan Rag
That loved? rag!

No idea why this song from Michigan J. Frog in the Looney Tunes just popped in my head, but these lyrics are quite suggestive.

Everybody do the Michigan Rag
Everybody likes the Michigan Rag
Every Mame and Jane and Ruth
From Weehauken to Duluth
Slide, ride, glide? the Michigan
Stomp, romp, pomp the Michigan
Jump, pump, hump the Michigan Rag
That loved? rag!

No idea why this song from Michigan J. Frog in the Looney Tunes just popped in my head, but these lyrics are quite suggestive.

I have brokeded the Ancient WordPress Code.

You CAN post duplicate comments with enough clumsy cluelessness.

Romney was a “missionary” in France during the sixties? Really? France?! WHY?!

Most American missionary work is done in countries which are already 90%+ Christian, i.e. looking to convert Catholics and Anglicans and Lutherans to Horse-Bonch Convention Foursquare Baptists; the Mormons are only ‘weird’ in this regard in that they send missionaries to white countries as well as brown ones, and their claims to be strangers in a strange land, their mortal lives in danger, etc are no less fervent for that. (Although it’s safer being a white American missionary in Nigeria than it is being a white American missionary in Kansas City, or a Nigerian in Nigeria, or certainly a Nigerian in Kansas City.)

Nota bene, though – it’s only well-connected guys from rich families who typically go to countries like France or England to do missionary work. The pious middle-class types either get nice postings in Africa or South America or shitty postings in the lousy parts of Europe, and bottom-of-the-pole strivers get America.

Also, it’s kind of unfair to call Mittens weird for using his dad’s connections to dodge the draft with a vacation when Romney is so genuinely weird. My favorite out of those is his genuinely trying to get his grandkids to call him and Ann “Ike and Mamie”.

Romney was a “missionary” in France during the sixties? Really? France?! WHY?!

Because the French should be receptive to a religion which shuns wine and coffee.

Incidentally, the Horse Bonch Convention resolved the burning question of how one spells “jaysusah”. The variant spelling “jayysus-ah” is an abominable scriptural innovation and clear evidence of Pelagianism and possibly even Arminianism.

Because the French should be receptive to a religion which shuns wine and coffee.

On the other hand, the official policy of “no, of course you can’t have more than one wife, that’d be immoral, wink wink” can’t have hurt.

Also, it’s kind of unfair to call Mittens weird for using his dad’s connections to dodge the draft with a vacation when Romney is so genuinely weird.

Mitt’s an unholy mash-up of Mr Burns and Flanders.

On the other hand, the official policy of “no, of course you can’t have more than one wife, that’d be immoral, wink wink” can’t have hurt.

I don’t think any Parisians could be arsed marrying more than one woman.

Don’t know what the Mommy Wars were?

I believe it was the crossover that gave Spider-Man his black costume. Or the one where Iron Man acted like a JerkAss.

Once again Cerberus wields the razor-sharp blade of snark like a Samurai sword.

Romney was a “missionary” in France during the sixties? Really? France?! WHY?!

Oh, so when my uncle was getting killed by that VC ambush in ’67 Mitt was in fucking Paris?

Man, I hate him that much more now. Fucker.

The grass is not always greener on the other side — it is burnt and brown on both sides.

So lawns are really like…toast? Wha?

Pryme-

So if you mix the “Mommy Wars” and the “Clone Wars” would you get the real-life story of Mitt Romney’s grandfather?

So if you mix the “Mommy Wars” and the “Clone Wars” would you get the real-life story of Mitt Romney’s grandfather?

Man, George Lucas does ruin everything!

The real question here is why we haven’t asked Donald Trump to solve homelessness.

Man, George Lucas does ruin everything!

Jar-Jar ruining the Senate vs. a story where Spider-Man learns that the Green Goblin seduced Gwen Stacy (and had kids!) before tossing her off a bridge?

(dis)Advantage: Marvel Editors.

So if you mix the “Mommy Wars” and the “Clone Wars” would you get the real-life story of Mitt Romney’s grandfather?

With a smidgen of The Penguin’s “My Family Lost The Fortune & I Want Revenge” origin story sprinkled in, yeah. Those darn Mexican revolutions!

Testing…

Whew. Just wanted to see if Pryme had worked that all-italics magic again.

Did pryme do it again?

Forget Trump.

Let’s ask Bat Girl.
~

Oh those zany Mormons.

The blockquote tag! Come on, it’s just 16 more characters!

See? See here?

There! We’re not on Twitter, for God’s sake, you’re not at that much of a premium!

Are you really happy looking like a scrub?

This shows people which words are yours and which words are quotes! In a block!

I’m not some kind of wizard!

I barely know any HTML!

I had to look up the marquee tag the other day!

But you have to have standards! Standards!

Standards!

Standards!

Bookmark this, libs.

You know, in case you ever want to use HTML like an adult.

0.0

I

do

think

the

blockquote

tag

is

sorely

underused

myself

but

sometimes

,

especially

on

a

mobile

but

that’s

justme

See! Using the tag on a mobile device RUINS YOUR COMMENT,

I blame Mini__B and Dudeskull.

Oh Bob in Himmel, I’m not looking forward to the day one of you manages to break the comment thread with blockquotes.

N_B

This is right up your alley. I was driving home from Huntington WV last week and I took a side trip through Point Pleasant:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silver_bridge

There’s not much to see really, just a plaque on the West Virginia side of the river.

http://www.panoramio.com/photo/63008738

Oh Bob in Himmel, I’m not looking forward to the day one of you manages to break the comment thread with blockquotes.

But I am! Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!

Revenge!

I only break threads on purpose.

Major –

Fascinating stuff. The fact that it was an eyebar-chain suspension bridge built in 1928 is what really leaps off the page: Roebling and Ellet had made that type obsolete in the 1840s. It’s like hearing that a jet crashed because of a rip in its fuselage cloth.

In short, lack of redundancy kills. Lack of redundancy kills. Lack of redundancy kills.

Trump has his hair, tv show and creepy duck face to contend with. Trump has no time for the homeless

Lack of redundancy kills.

When I was in Flight Engineer school for the 727, the instructor kept saying “Mr. Boeing doesn’t like a single point of failure”.

Everything fails. Bolts break, wood beams burn, concrete spalls… The question is what happens overall when a single failure takes place.

On topic: if our society is structured so that people have to hold down multiple jobs and can’t afford to be SAHMs and can’t afford to get sick…what happens when they do?

If Mitt Romney is elected, Ann will be the only First Lady born this century to not have worked outside the home.

Mitt Married A Minor?

Oh Bob in Himmel, I’m not looking forward to the day one of you manages to break the comment thread with blockquotes.

If I am not mistaken some meaty yet sober person did that already. Or maybe it was me. Canna recall. I do recall some chucklenuts bemoaning the impotence of the blink tag in such circumstances.

Also too, is that a challenge?

On topic: if our society is structured so that people have to hold down multiple jobs and can’t afford to be SAHMs and can’t afford to get sick…what happens when they do?

The lucky duckies get to sling onto the public hammock and take a vacation from being a grown-up.

What, would you have the government create perverse incentives to be sick? Everyone would get sick all the time!! Moochers would vote in politicians who would make everyone sick!! Surely even those lazy sickos would prefer to die than to live in such a crazy upside-down world where their unique, personal choice to have the flu is replaced by government-issued bacteria stolen from productive citizens.

“She and husband Mitt have five children, all boys, born between 1970 and 1981. Ann Romney has not been a stay at home mom for a long time.”–Wiley

To be fair, she didn’t stop breast feeding until 1990.

To be fair, she didn’t stop breast feeding until 1990.

Which is when Mitt finally decided things were doing so well at Bain he could justify hiring himself a nurse.

To be fair, she didn’t stop breast feeding until 1990.

On a related note, Jim Treacher suckles at his mommy’s teat. But then, so does D-KW.

Which is when Mitt finally decided things were doing so well at Bain he could justify hiring himself a nurse.

Amah let you finish…

On a related note, Jim Treacher suckles at his mommy’s teat. But then, so does D-KW.

Careful. If you say Jim Treacher too much he’ll show up with dogged determination to become top dog of whatever dog-eat-dog conversation is in progress, ideally to the detriment of Obama – that black dog in the night.

Jim Treacher pees his pants.

Speak not his name lest he appear!

I hear Jim Treacher is so vain he has a Google alert set so he can follow any mention of his name and respond, no matter how trivial it is or how asinine it makes him look.

I hear Jim Treacher used to be a big deal in Internet comedy and look where his career is now.

Treachery!

Broiled cod steaks au natural, a light liaison of butter, lemon, the fish juices. Asparagus risotto – partly because I’ve never made risotto in the PC before (kin ya bleevit?) Strawberry shortcake.

made risotto in the PC before

Doesn’t it gum up the hard drive?

Most American missionary work is done in countries which are already 90%+ Christian, i.e. looking to convert Catholics and Anglicans and Lutherans to Horse-Bonch Convention Foursquare Baptists; the Mormons are only ‘weird’ in this regard in that they send missionaries to white countries as well as brown ones, and their claims to be strangers in a strange land, their mortal lives in danger, etc are no less fervent for that.

Used to attend an evangelical church that was big on missionaries before coming to my senses, and can confirm this is true. Wasn’t aware of the class distinctions, but it makes perfect sense – none of the missionaries I knew were rich and none of them were going to any mansions in western Europe.

(Although someone here, I believe, once pointed out to me that a modest income here translates to a much more comfortable existence in poorer countries where the cost of living is cheaper, and that some missionaries enjoy the third world just for that reason).

Used to attend an evangelical church that was big on missionaries before coming to my senses, and can confirm this is true. Wasn’t aware of the class distinctions, but it makes perfect sense – none of the missionaries I knew were rich and none of them were going to any mansions in western Europe.

The distinctions were specifically for Mormons, and only from my own second-hand experience. I’d expect the classic ‘normal’ evangelical missionary work to take place somewhere like southern East Africa or South America or the Philippines – i.e. fairly stable and with a significant local middle class, and also extremely Christian, but swarthy and thus in need of a civilizin’. The key figure in this was McKinley, who applied the patronizing logic of evangelical mission work in China and Japan to the Philippines in spite of its mainly Catholic populace and, ridiculously, managed to get significant political-Christian support for the enterprise in America anyway.

The classic American missionary experience is in fact in China: there are at least some local plutocrats who you can butter up by claiming to be working for law and order and industrial development, and lots of indigent people who thanks to those plutocrats know indigence isn’t a state of nature, and the Jesuits / the English have already turned over the soil so you don’t have any serious work to do if you don’t care to pick up the lingo, and the Authorities (i.e. the Jesuits / Anglicans) don’t care like you do and are willing to just let those poor people be oppressed by a pagan government. And there are plenty of American companies – and foreign ministry desks throughout the world – who need experienced white translators / anthropologists.

It’s one of those strange cases where the means (middle-class expats working for retroassimilation by poor locals) has eclipsed the end (Christianity). I’m sure if South Carolina had become its own country in 1820 your church would have missions there.

Broiled cod steaks au natural, a light liaison of butter, lemon, the fish juices. Asparagus risotto – partly because I’ve never made risotto in the PC before (kin ya bleevit?) Strawberry shortcake.

Pour le din din it is blanched-extruded dark chicken mass fried in peanut oil topped with extra-ripe frites MacDo and garnished with our special ketchup-Thousand Island-onion-chunk dressing, lightly sunned for three days and served on commemorative Eisenhower plate. For supper wine it is Heineken – pardon, mais non – “fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!”

Anti-gay-activist-with-a-big-manly-moustache Michael Brown:

For the “anyone but Obama” camp, this kind of reasoning is as foolhardy as it is off limits. In four more years, they would argue, America will be unrecognizable and broken beyond the point of recovery, at least for the immediate future. And, they would be quick to remind us, Obama himself told President Medvedev of Russia that in his next term, he will have “more flexibility,” a chilling prospect, to be sure. And what about those Supreme Court justices Obama will appoint?

On the other hand, if America needs a radical course correction, what’s the use of electing another status quo (or worse) president, if, in fact, that’s what Romney would be? If the political establishment is a big part (the biggest part?) of the problem, then the only way to bring about real change is to challenge the establishment or to work outside the establishment. If not now, then when?

Jim Treacher eats his own poop every day.
Jim Treacher eats his own poop every day.
Jim Treacher eats his own poop every day.
Jim Treacher eats his own poop every day.
Jim Treacher eats his own poop every day.
Jim Treacher eats his own poop every day.

Jim Treacher eats his own poop every day.

Should this merit a recipe? I’m not sure if it counts as foodie talk.

All day long I’ve been in a misanthropic mood, havin’ a hell-is-other-people day for no particular reason, and now to top it off I hear about this Jim Treacher person.

Ah, my son, are you truly prepared to undertake the secretive adventure of a Mormon missionary in France? Your two year mission, should you choose to accept it: Bravely yet subversively spread the True Creator’s holy message in direct opposition to the heathens’ local paradigm: Two Wives = Good, Wife and a Mistress = Bad.

All day long I’ve been in a misanthropic mood, havin’ a hell-is-other-people day for no particular reason, and now to top it off I hear about this Jim Treacher person.

Apropos of nothing, then, here’s a tiny sheep who likes to leap.

Mommy wars? Couldn’t we have mommy nude wrestling, instead?
.

There will always be an England.

At least until the zombocalypse. (Or the austeritycalypse, which will lead to more abandoned malls, so …)

Jeffraham ! You survived your First Day at Big School ! How was it?

Well, if J.P. fell in, they fished him out in time.

On topic.

Jeffraham ! You survived your First Day at Big School ! How was it?

AWESOME. Moar this weekend.
.

I hear Jim Treacher used to be a big deal in Internet comedy and look where his career is now.

Treacher:Comedy as Jonah:History

Discuss.

Damn…sorry y’all, still not used to a site with do-it-yourself formatting (or a giant error pop-up message saying, “TRY AGAIN, A-HOLE”).

BTW, the kids are not going to be alright: http://crooksandliars.com/susie-madrak/ap-half-young-college-grads-are-joble. But Gawker’s looking at the bright side (?): http://gawker.com/5904376/major-crisis-23+year+old-college-grads-are-working-shitty-jobs

Hey Pupienus,

I’m curious about how your risotto turned out. Any scorching? I’ve been a bit apprehensive about using the pressure cooker for that but was planning to follow something like this.

http://missvickie.com/howto/grains/howtorisotto.html

I thought that constant stirring was pretty much essential to making risotto, because that’s what releases the starch from the rice – which is what gives it the proper texture?

I know, that’s why it would seem odd to make it in a pressure cooker where you cannot stir. People swear by that method, though.

Maybe the pressure releases the starch?

I thought that constant stirring was pretty much essential to making risotto, because that’s what releases the starch from the rice – which is what gives it the proper texture?

Yeah, ya gots to coat the rice in fat (I typically use a butter/olive oil mix), then add boiling stock gradually, just covering the rice. Making it in a pressure cooker seems wronger than a football bat.

Maybe the pressure releases the starch?

It works for most bodily fluids.

I thought that constant stirring was pretty much essential to making risotto, because that’s what releases the starch from the rice – which is what gives it the proper texture?

Yup.

Making it in a pressure cooker seems wronger than a football bat.

Try toasting the rice in the cooker first. The starches ought to come out of the kernel then.

Cook’s Illustrated published an “almost no-stir” risotto recipe a couple years back that turned out quite well.

I thought that constant stirring was pretty much essential to making risotto, because that’s what releases the starch from the rice – which is what gives it the proper texture?

Oh yeah. Yeah. Most definitely.

I think the whole “must stir constantly!!” thing is a bit overhyped.

I believe that all teh stirring snobs have nevar made risotto without stirring and are talking out their asses.

You don’t need to “stir constantly”. While I do believe in adding the liquid a bit at a time, and stirring to get that incorporated, it’s really not that much stirring. More like a scrape and flip with a spatula. Maybe a couple seconds of “stirring” every ten minutes or so.

Totes agree on toasting the rice grains in advance though.

I’d be interrested to know how the pressure cooker version turns out.

That said, I stir paella so what do I know?

“sending kids to school” IS an economic issue.

To be clear, they didn’t mean PHYSICALLY getting your kid ready in the morning and walking them on the bus! Seriously, “how the fuck” did the author NOT figure that out?

Many families live in under-performing or unsafe school districts, and wish to send their children to a better school, and they may decide to devote a large portion of their income to get their kids a better education. Also, even if you’re sending them to public school, it is still going to cost you a significant amount. Clothing (and many schools have uniform codes now), school supplies, field trip fees, lab fees, money for lunch (and sometimes breakfast, too), a computer and internet access in the home … you feel like you’re constantly shelling out cash when you have kids in school. Also, many districts are cutting back on transportation, and this means more kids have to get driven to-and-from school now … and I don’t have to remind you how expensive gas is these days!

So, yes, “sending kids to school” is indeed an economic issue that many poor and middle class families struggle with.

I have never made risotto, so I’m going with “stir the fuck out that bitch”/

re: stirring.

Someone has documented the results of their testing. And now I have homework:

To test this, I cooked another batch of risotto, this time dumping the raw rice into a bowl and pouring my cold broth directly on top. I agitated the rice to release all of the starch, then poured it through a fine mesh strainer, reserving the starchy, cloudy broth on the side. (It was starchy enough that you could see white starch settling on the bottom).

After draining, I toasted my rinsed rice in a mixture of butter and olive oil until it was just beginning to turn golden brown. Finally, I added the starchy liquid back to the pot, brought it to a simmer, lidded it, and cooked it, stirring once in the middle.

What I ended up with was pure win:

I was sneezing before I read this: http://wonkette.com/470754/why-is-this-tennessee-school-racist-against-this-nice-girls-confederate-flag-dress

Now I’m nauseated.

Just for ha-has I used the Googles to search . One thing I learned, she’s not really a blond! Shocking – I know. Beautiful horses though.

I was sneezing before I read this
Forgive me if it goes astray
But when I woke up this mornin
Coulda sworn it was judgment day

Best comment from N-B’s link:

She just wanted to show off her new figure after giving birth 5 years ago. Let’s cut her some slack.

I like that her name’s Texanna.

That said, I stir paella so what do I know?

Snob!

She just wanted to show off her new figure after giving birth 5 years ago. Let’s cut her some slack.

The white robe covers too much.

The fact isTexanna’s last name is Edwards. Probably one of John Edward’s million love children. Therefore teh real racists and slavemongererers are Democrats.

She really fucked that outfit up. A camouflage shawl would have REALLY tied thing together. I DEFY you to stop her from attending her prom with the shawl.

Moral of the story: METH IS BAD, Y’ALL!

And before all you libbies go on with your shouts of PRIVILEGE!, I’d like to point out that only Texanna was turned away from teh prom. And NOT all those black guys who showed up in suits – looking much the same as a certain un-named Hussein Obama X Kenyan usurper who has caused way moar suffering than all teh plantations in teh history of forever. Double standard much? You liberals are all hypocrites.

She really fucked that outfit up. A camouflage shawl would have REALLY tied thing together

Jethro, the tweaker next trailer over, urinated on the shawl.

re: Texanna

If I was in teh South, Ultra Ninja’s name would have been Texavery.

Texanna Edwards just wanted to dress up as the muscle car from “The Dukes Of Hazzard,” the General Lee.

Anyone caught painting a confederate flag on the roof of a ’69 Dodge Charger should face immediate execution without appeal.

Anyone caught flying that fucking traitorous piece of shit flag should be immediately executed. We have a flag in this country. If you want to have another flag, feel free to leave and start your own fucking POS backwater shithole nation where sex crimes aren’t crimes and all the faces are white. Fucking seditious traitors.

There goes my goddamn blood pressure.

Also, how many fucking pills do you have to smoke to think that a confederate flag dress is anything other than trashy and cuntly? Who the fuck MAKES that fucking thing? What kind of POS store would sell it–OH let me guess: Walmart?

Fucking South. Go to hell and die you fucking animals.

tsam – I think they tried that once and for some unknown reason we decided to make them stay.

Must have seemed like a good idea at the time.

If I was in teh South, Ultra Ninja’s name would have been Texavery.

Well played!

tsam – I think they tried that once and for some unknown reason we decided to make them stay.

I think they were free to leave, they just weren’t allowed to keep the territory. They’re still free to leave. Maybe they can start a colony in Somalia.

So I cooked some shallots in butter and oil then some garlic then the arborio rice for a few minutes. Hot insanely good brown chicken stock plus some of the asparagus blanching water went in. Four minutes at pressure then remove from heat wait seven minutes before opening. Add the Spargles, so e more butter (yeah, so fucking what?) and a raft of fresh grated parm. regg.

Texture was very interesting. The rice itself was creamy but it wasn’t at all saucy. I’ll surely make another PC risotto if only to experiment, see what happens with different rice:likwid ratios, alternate cooking times, whatever. It was a lot easier than ladle stir stir stir ladle stir stir … but the conventional method isn’t all that much of a PITA so I’d be hard pressed to justify the method on ease alone.

Anyone caught painting a confederate flag on the roof of a ’69 Dodge Charger should face immediate execution without appeal.

What if it’s a ’78 Pacer and it’s old glory instead and you call the car ‘General Sherman’?

Or if its a 1975 Datsun 280z with the IJN’s rising sun flag and call it the Admiral Yamamoto?

Both times I’ve made risotto it’s turned out swimmingly. I the “stir constantly” thing is a bit overwrought. “Stay on top of it,” is the advice I’d give.

What if it’s an all-whote Prius and you call it General Amnesty?

Also, how many fucking pills do you have to smoke to think that a confederate flag dress is anything other than trashy and cuntly? Who the fuck MAKES that fucking thing? What kind of POS store would sell it–OH let me guess: Walmart?

Fucking South. Go to hell and die you fucking animals.

Yeah. Sometimes it’s like a whole nother world down here. *shakes head*

all-white, too.

How about a beat-up Edsel with the GOP elephant, and you call it the K-Lo?

What if it’s a Gadsden flag on a rusted out old camper?

After my Jim Treacher Blues Explosion Experience yesterday, I got trolled on twitter. Tee hee.

What if it’s a ’78 Pacer and it’s old glory instead and you call the car ‘General Sherman’?

How fun would it be to paint Old Glory on a giant, jacked up truck and a huge “General Sherman” painted on the sides and cruise through all the dumb states? You’d get it SO MANY gunfights!

After my Jim Treacher Blues Explosion Experience yesterday, I got trolled on twitter. Tee hee.

potty mouth…oh, she burned you good!

@VS;

That is NOT grounds for divorce! “You’re In Love” is still in my regular rotation.

You hurted my feewings!

But the guy called me a dog! Yay!

Love that picture on your Twitter, btw.

How fun would it be to paint Old Glory on a giant, jacked up truck and a huge “General Sherman” painted on the sides and cruise through all the dumb states? You’d get it SO MANY gunfights!

And you could shoot first, claiming that you felt threatened! Thank you, GOP representatives, you’ve made your districts “turkey shoots”.

Also, how many fucking pills do you have to smoke to think that a confederate flag dress is anything other than trashy and cuntly?

Not long ago there was a newspaper interview with the creator/star of some cable TV show–damn it, I can’t remember which one, because it’s on one of those channels that Comcrap deems my $70 a month not enough to get. Anyway, the guy said he was in some beach shop in North Carolina or some damn place and saw a T-shirt with a Confederate flag and a pot leaf on top of it. He and his friend started laughing their asses off, like, What the fuck does that even mean? That I’m a racist who smokes pot? They bought the thing and incorporated it into their show.

Anyone out there know the show? It’s about a racist minor-league baseball player, that’s all I remember.

Oooh. “Potty mouth.” That must have stung.

Well, tsam, I’m just funnin’ you Ratt fans…there’s plenty of questionable stuff I like.

And thank you. (((hug)))

Sounds like “Eastbound & Down,” BS.

@Bitter Scribe;

Sounds like “East Bound and Down”

The “You’re fucking OUT” guy, right?

The whole Ann Romney mommy kerfuffle is perhaps the greatest bit of political question-begging since the Chequers speech. Holy crap. A billionaire housewife and dressage enthusiast is spokesperson for stay-at-home moms? For all women? For anyone facing economic hardship?
Yeah right. If (When) Mitt doesn’t win, she can be on the new Bravo show Real Housewives of Berkshires or Salt Lake. She can be the boring one.
If our liberal media really wanted to go further with this story, they’d find some working or no-longer-working mom who lost her job when Mittens trashed her employer and/or community. She can quiz Ann on the economic challenges facing women today. Michael Moore, I smell your next project.

Yeah. What smedley said. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

The whole Ann Romney mommy kerfuffle is perhaps the greatest bit of political question-begging since the Chequers speech. Holy crap. A billionaire housewife and dressage enthusiast is spokesperson for stay-at-home moms? For all women? For anyone facing economic hardship

It’s even better than that… Ann Romney has a sense of entitlement that would make Lady MacBeth say “What?”

Wow, ‘Slayer, that was some sorry ass trolling. I guess mighty jamokes from little nuts grow.

Tigris, right? I ignored them.

That’s the right tack I think.

“If our liberal media really wanted to go further…….”

Yeah, but, here’s the thing. It’s really not up to the “neutral” media to instigate these things. It’s up to our side, meaning either the Dem-friendly media or Dems themselves. The other side knows how to play this game. Our side doesn’t.

Yeah, but, here’s the thing. It’s really not up to the “neutral” media to instigate these things. It’s up to our side, meaning either the Dem-friendly media or Dems themselves. The other side knows how to play this game. Our side doesn’t.

I think the problem is that we aren’t willing to spin outrageous falsehoods, while that’s their stock-in-trade. The one saving grace is that the GOP is so hateful, and Mitt is so unlikeable. Still, the money-bombing is going to be unprecedented- hopefully, such a saturation will make people even sicker of Mitt than they already are.

True, but the money-bombing done by Rove, et al, will have some people questioning not only if Obama is an American, but also if he is even human.

The other side knows how to play this game. Our side doesn’t.

It helps when you can view winning and losing in the socioeconomic realm as a game. Our side tends to think that playing by the rules should earn you at least the consolation prize of food, shelter, health care, a decent education, and the knowledge that color/gender/orientation/political persuasion/age, etc…won’t help or hurt you in the quest for jobs, education and justice.

I think that the media narrative has developed and moved forward – hooray for short attention spans! That the major impression being left is that motherhood is hard work (I do my part in relieveing their stress) and that even Ann Romney recognizes that some women don’t have the option to stay-at-home (which is what this is really all about in the first place).

Therefore – now is the time to push for national subsidized day care.

Also, it is up to the neutral media to report statistical data in a manner that reflects reality, rather than the constant barrage of reports on where the stock/bond markets are sitting at this particular moment. They report inflation excluding food and energy. Is there anything more useless to the working poor than neutral inflation on durable goods?

Ruh-Roh, looks like Mitt’s secret weapon blew up in his magic underpants. Not only clueless, but callous as hell.

Goddess bless those weird weird weird weird gaffe-prone Rmoneys. What a freakshow.

“I love the fact that there are women out there who don’t have a choice.”

Looks like the Romneytron Politico-Empathetic Unit 2000 version 1.0 (f) has a hard time grasping the concept of “love.”

I think that the media narrative has developed and moved forward – hooray for short attention spans! That the major impression being left is that motherhood is hard work (I do my part in relieveing their stress) and that even Ann Romney recognizes that some women don’t have the option to stay-at-home (which is what this is really all about in the first place).

If you go back to the original derailment, it was about the fact that Mitt claimed he had special insight into women’s issues because of Ann. That’s what Hilary Rosen reacted to. After all the kerfluffle has died down. I think most people would realize that’s a pretty tepid and dubious claim, no matter what Ann’s virtues as a Mom are, so it should be forgotten.

While researching this silliness, I ran across 2004’s “Democrats hate moms” scandal, which has been completely forgotten. As will this.

I think most people would realize that’s a pretty tepid and dubious claim, no matter what Ann’s virtues as a Mom are, so it should be forgotten.

While researching this silliness, I ran across 2004?s “Democrats hate moms” scandal, which has been completely forgotten. As will this.

enh…but how long?!?!? i mean they’re still working the ‘those sluts want us to pay for them to have sex’ like it’s a lottery ticket…

Therefore – now is the time to push for national subsidized day care.

is that in the alinsky playbook? cuz it doesn’t sound devious or thuggish enough…

“Therefore – now is the time to push for national subsidized day care.”

Now, the fact that our side will not do so proves what I wrote upthread, that our side doesn’t know how to play this game.

Now, the fact that our side will not do so proves what I wrote upthread, that our side doesn’t know how to play this game.

to paraphrase: sadly, yes…

LOL…some dude just called in and requested ‘wild fire’ by michael martin murphy…now i have an image of some grody old cowboy singing wistfully as he drives his old pickup truck down the road…

Now, the fact that our side will not do so proves what I wrote upthread, that our side doesn’t know how to play this game.

I think the real problem is that, upon hearing “national subsidized day care”, the wingnut Wurlitzer will start screaming “Obama’s Marxist Indoctrination Camps for Children!!!”

Now, the fact that our side will not do so proves what I wrote upthread, that our side doesn’t know how to play this game.

Who’s ‘our’? ‘Our’ side is trying to win the election on the basis that Romney is not serious enough about reducing the deficit and blowing up Iranians and etc. The balance of power is held by media-hounds, receptive exclusively to whatever CNN and Fox have been saying this week.

Obama isn’t going to militate for subsidized day care for the same reason he took the first legislative hurdle to HCR to try and push Pelosi under the bus and replace the Heritage Foundation plan with an even more worthless one. While to a degree he misguidedly thought that he could compromise with nonexistent moderates, the result is that he’s been acting like Joe Lieberman instead of Ben Nelson, where his politics seem to naturally go.

The Democrats won’t actually start holding their noses and acting on left rhetoric unless they have something to be afraid of from us.

Via Teh Ho, who has appparently become a crazy pet video person, http://www.wimp.com/doorstopcat/

Well, yes they will. And for years I have been whining that our side should call them out on this. It should be easy. Our way of life for the last century has benefitted from several socialistic programs, and name them: social security, medicare, police force, fire department, unions, farm co-ops, etc. But we have few who will do that. Thank you, Bernie Sanders!

cuz it doesn’t sound devious or thuggish enough,,,

Now is the time for national subsidized daycare and burning shit down.

Democrats want to marry their mothers and murder their fathers!

April 24, 2012 at 20:10

Wasn’t there a poster here a couple of years ago who used the nym “That Tragic 70s Song Wildfire,” or the like?

Anyways, speaking of teh War on Moms, I am reminded of something.

Democrats want to marry their mothers and murder their fathers!

Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father rapers!

Wasn’t there a poster here a couple of years ago who used the nym “That Tragic 70s Song Wildfire,” or the like?

no? srsly?!?

Anyways, speaking of teh War on Moms, I am reminded of something.

at the risk of being repetitive: no? srsly?!?

Now is the time for national subsidized daycare and burning shit down.

The daycare centers could always compost the shit.

omg…nother dude on the radio just called in to request a song because his woman of five years just called to tell him it was over…but HE wants HER to know that HA, HA, HE HAD A BACK UP WOMAN!!!

all the freaks that call in to this radio show all have southern accents…why is that?

And speaking of the War Against Stay-At-Home-Moms, I am reminded of something.

HA, HA, HE HAD A BACK UP WOMAN!!!

“I’d like to dedicate this to my back-up woman Reyanne Franklin. Honey, for the time being you are my one and only.”

The only thing I have learned from this Rosen thing is that stay at home moms are really fucking defensive.

Amanda Henneberg, a spokeswoman for Romney, said the following in an email to the Huffington Post on Sunday:

“Moving welfare recipients into work was one of the basic principles of the bipartisan welfare reform legislation that President Clinton signed into law. The sad fact is that under President Obama the poverty rate among women rose to 14.5 percent in 2011, the highest rate in 17 years. The Obama administration’s economic policies have been devastating to women and families.”

gary is amanda?

The only thing I have learned from this Rosen thing is that stay at home moms are really fucking defensive.

word…

she ran calling wi-i-i-i-i-i-i-ild fiiire

As my ass is getting kicked by degeneration, it is embittering to me that not only do I have a memory of that stupid song, I seem to remember the most grating part of it.

As my ass is getting kicked by degeneration, it is embittering to me that not only do I have a memory of that stupid song, I seem to remember the most grating part of it.

i am more sorry for that than you will ever know…

I’m not defensive. I’m Team Rosen, ftr.

I kinda remember that wildfire nym but I don’t remember which site it was.
Always protect your ponies from “killing frost”.

relevant.

Well, bbkf, you had the misfortune of having to play it. Do you have vinyl albums in your studio or what?

I’m not defensive. I’m Team Rosen, ftr.

true…but you are also self-aware…i believe you may have given me my next blog post…cuz i have some complicated thoughts and feelings on the matter of ‘working’ moms and stay at home moms…

Well, bbkf, you had the misfortune of having to play it. Do you have vinyl albums in your studio or what?

i’m not down there right now, just listening…pretty much everything we have is digital or cd…all the vinyl is moldering away in somebody’s basement, sadly…

not clicking…i’m afraid it will be ‘wildfire’…and once in a day is enough…ooooh, but it would be awesome if it was some sort of rick roll…

the most grating part of it

I dunno, this part’s pretty awful too:

There’s been a hoot-owl howling by my window now
For six nights in a row
She’s coming for me, I know

DEATH BY HOOT-OWL.

As my ass is getting kicked by degeneration, it is embittering to me that not only do I have a memory of that stupid song, I seem to remember the most grating part of it.

Grating and depressing, all in one song!

Not a rickroll, a thurmroll.

Sorry, VS, I know better than to generalize like that.

As a single, childless lawyer, I am totally out of touch with stay at home moms, and I was shocked to read some of the defensive responses to Rosen. But I know there are plenty out there who, you know, actually read the whole quote and who know Ann Romney is clueless.

Hoot-owls and killing frost, sounds like a place for Bear Grylls.

Not a rickroll, a thurmroll.

ha…i need more martin short in my life…

Hoot-owls and killing frost, sounds like a place for Bear Grylls.

well it IS nebraska…

DEATH BY HOOT-OWL

Poor Seuplchrave.

Yeah, I think working parents and parents who work at home all have their crosses to bear. I also know they all work hard.

I also think the “mommy wars” are overhyped because people love the idea of women sniping at each other and it’s also a great way to demonize feminists. (Forgetting that feminists like me may exist.) *sigh*

Pesky hoot-owls.

I also think the “mommy wars” are overhyped because people love the idea of women sniping at each other and it’s also a great way to demonize feminists. (Forgetting that feminists like me may exist.) *sigh*

i also think part of it is self-justification for what ever choice you’ve made…

If anyone here hasn’t read Faludi’s Backlash consider that a homework assignment, because seriously, ‘mommy wars’ is like 80s anti-feminism 101.

A høøt-øwl once bit my sister …

zomg, child abuse!

divide and conquer

Mynd you, høøt-øwl bites Kan be pretty nasti…

Poor Seuplchrave.

Well played!

i also think part of it is self-justification for what ever choice you’ve made…

I’m sure that’s mixed in there, too.

Pesky hoot-owls.

If you hear him hoot, scoot.

It’s utterly fine for stay-at-home moms to be defensive when there’s a pretty constant denigration of that responsibility from all sorts of people. For most stay-at-home moms, though, that life is not Ann Romney’s life.

I’m not defensive. I’m Team Rosen, ftr.

I’m not. Don’t get me wrnog – she’s got Ann Rmoney dead to rights about being out-of-touch with normal women. I totes agree that teh criticism she’s getting for this “gaffe” is ridiculous bullshit. I find it especially galling that there are Stay-At-Home-Moms who have a problem with what Hilary Rosen said, but are totally okay with Mitt saying that poor moms with babbies as young as two should be back in teh labour force*. Apparently for teh “dignity of work”.

All of that said – Hilary Rosen was a RIAA – asswipe. In fact, she was Chief RIAA – asswipe for years. Teh whole RIAA going after individuals for six and seven figure DMCA fines? That’s Rosen. She was pro-SOPA and DMCA. So despite the fact that she’s 100% right in this circumstance, she can go fuck herself for all I care**.

* If the Mom-giacotti post didn’t piss you off enough, then you can always go and enjoy Part Two.

** And that’s taking into account that she’s a mom.

For most stay-at-home moms, though, that life is not Ann Romney’s life.

you got that right, brotha!

Inconveniently enough for teh right-wing War-On-Moms narrative here, Hilary Rosen left her job as CEO of RIAA to spend more time with her kids and be a stay-at-home mom.

It’s utterly fine for stay-at-home moms to be defensive when there’s a pretty constant denigration of that responsibility from all sorts of people. For most stay-at-home moms, though, that life is not Ann Romney’s life.

Well said!

FWIF, I think moms of all stripes are kewl.

oops

FWIF, I think moms of all stripes are kewl.

Even Tiger Mothers?

Yeah, the most insulting part was Mitt thinking Ann could speak for all women because hey, she’s got a uterus! The next worst was the “let’s you and her fight” aspect of the coverage. Fuck all those guys.

FWIF, I think moms of all stripes are kewl.

i daresay a certain someone here would agree with you…

i can’t my insurance doesn’t cover that…

i rate for the tag-fail wars…

Gotta go, loony libs, got a hot date with a real dreamboat serving a spread of structural engineering.

Badoodle boo-ya, Bastard out.

It’s utterly fine for stay-at-home moms to be defensive when there’s a pretty constant denigration of that responsibility from all sorts of people.

My bad for not having noticed this. (Except for those moms who receive aid and stay home with their kids because child care would eat their entire minimum wage paycheck. I see them get denigrated pretty much daily.) When I was a kid, I was bullied because my mom worked full time.

I guess my point was that those freaking out over Rosen’s comments seemed defensive because they didn’t even bother to read the entire quote or understand the context, and instead moved immediately to, “Hilary Rosen said that stay at home moms are lazy and unproductive!” But, maybe that’s from years of abuse that I was previously unaware of, being a singleton career-type.

Even Tiger Mothers?

The kind that roam the grasslands, yes.

Hoot Scootin’ boogie.

That song is NOW stuck in your head and LOL and such.

Hoot Scootin’ boogie.

when my daughter was little she thought the words were oop scoop and oogie…

-when my daughter was little she thought the words were oop scoop and oogie…

YOU LET HER LISTEN TO THAT SHIT?

YOU LET HER LISTEN TO THAT SHIT?

I’M SORRY THAT I HAD TO MAKE MY LIVING PLAYING SHITTY COUNTRY MUSIC!!!

So, is it OK that I respect Hilary Rosen for her single motherhood and advocacy for it, while simultaneously despising her for her tenure as president of the RIAA?

It’s like the NBA finals: you can root for one side or the other but all of them go home millionaires and you don’t.

It’s like the NBA finals: you can root for one side or the other but all of them go home millionaires and you don’t.

you should really needlepoint that on a pillow…

So, is it OK that I respect Hilary Rosen for her single motherhood and advocacy for it, while simultaneously despising her for her tenure as president of the RIAA?

As long as it’s ok for me to hate Al Gore’s guts because of his snatch wife and her PMRC freakshow.

I’M SORRY THAT I HAD TO MAKE MY LIVING PLAYING SHITTY COUNTRY MUSIC!!!

ONE OF THESE DAYS, BBKF

POW!

STRAIGHT TO THE JUNK.

but all of them go home millionaires and you don’t.

unless you’re spike lee.

Are Ratt fans permitted to judge anyone else’s musical predilections?

ONE OF THESE DAYS, BBKF

STRAIGHT TO THE JUNK.

BOO FUCKING YAH!

Are Ratt fans permitted to judge anyone else’s musical predilections?

BOOM

Are Ratt fans permitted to judge anyone else’s musical predilections?

she’s got a point there.

A hoot owl bit my sister once
and whitey’s on the moon.

Are Ratt fans permitted to judge anyone else’s musical predilections?

Yes, particularly if they know the drummer’s name is Bobby Blotzer and were able to continue listening. I’m twirling around a stripper pole RIGHT NOW.

Are Ratt fans permitted to judge anyone else’s musical predilections?

eh…i had to play a lot of ratt at one time also…i suppose the shitty country music gig was my fault because i couldn’t tough it out with the good ol’ boys club that was called a radio station…i just couldn’t hack the midnight to six a.m. shift which had added to it (while the office manager was out on maternity leave and just never ended) going back in at around noonish to work in the office and working until 6 p.m. and then going home and being back for the overnight shift…never mind that it was a 38 mile round trip…

the day i left, was one of the best tittyfucking days of my life…cuz i did it in the middle of a shift (which i was filling in for somebody) after an altercation with the uber-misogynistic program director because these insane hours, two kids at home and virtually $0/hr just weren’t working and he said something about ‘paying my dues’ fuck that! a tiny piece of shit station in the middle of bumfuck south dakota?…i cocked off and was out the door…it was awesome…

. I’m twirling around a stripper pole RIGHT NOW.

d’oh! i am FORBIDDEN to have access to this…now i want to see it so bad!!!

Democrats want to marry their mothers and murder their fathers!

President Oedipus’ personal life is irrelevant to his leadership.

Pssh, you old people with your paychecks and your careers and your sense of purpose, lame.

Now if you’ll excuse me I’ve got to keep chewing this quarter pint of dry brown rice for the next hour, because that is lunch.

I couldn’t get anywhere with that link, and I’m pretty upset about it, because I think I speak for everyone here when I say I want to see Substance twirling around a stripper pole. Heck, a Festivus pole would do.

Anyway, I kid Ratt fans because whenever I hear their music, I always think of this.

But there is no judgment behind my ribbing. Please remember, I am a woman with Kelly Clarkson, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera songs in her liberry…

I meant daymeal, the meal you eat in between nightmeal and fourthmeal, so more of a brunch.

Anyway, I kid Ratt fans because whenever I hear their music, I always think of this.

now i will be thinking of a shit sandwich that goes round and round…

Pssh, you old people with your paychecks and your careers and your sense of purpose, lame.

right? i think it’s time i start planning my mid-life crisis…torn between clueless hipster mom, manic pixie dream girl or just flat out cougar…what do you think?

The song was “Lay It Down” which should be available somewhere or other.

Please remember, I am a woman with Kelly Clarkson, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera songs in her liberry…

I’m a woman like that too! Maybe I don’t have Kelly Clarkson. YET.

right? i think it’s time i start planning my mid-life crisis…torn between clueless hipster mom, manic pixie dream girl or just flat out cougar…what do you think?

Go for manic hipster cougar. You can rip a cow apart and just fling its horrible remains all over the place before it gets played out.

Go for manic hipster cougar. You can rip a cow apart and just fling its horrible remains all over the place before it gets played out.

i like the cut of your jib, mr.!

Are Ratt fans permitted to judge anyone else’s musical predilections?

It depends on the Ratt fan. I don’t have long hair and don’t wear spandex (usually). I just like a few of their songs.

Now country fans, on the other hand, have their hats, boots, giant belt buckles, their own quaint little dances…it’s like Halloween EVERY FRIDAY AND SATURDAY!

In my case, yes. Yes I can judge the predilections of others if I feel like it. And no, nobody can judge me.

And no, nobody can judge me.

i promise i won’t judge you if we can see a pic of you in spandex…

i promise i won’t judge you if we can see a pic of you in spandex…

I have tons of them in clear spandex…want to see one of those?

Submitted without comment: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blogs/florida-man-mistakes-girlfriend-hog-shoots-her-180030103–abc-news-topstories.html

According to Romney defenders, they didn’t have servants until after the kids eft the house. With the stories of Mitt renting u-hauls, family vacations and dogs on the roof and such, I guess this is believable. Stupid, but believable.

But she still never had any economic worries – her husband made amounts of money measure in millions, which puts them so stratospherically above the majority of Americans as to have no grasp of reality.

She never wanted for anything economically, unlike every other mother I know personally.

I have tons of them in clear spandex…want to see one of those?

sure, it’s probably saran wrap…

In my case, yes. Yes I can judge the predilections of others if I feel like it. And no, nobody can judge me.

There’s where you’re wrong, friend. Like, imagine my words coming out of this animal’s mouth, right?

Oh, Ratt? That’s cool. I always wanted to hang out with my high school janitor too.

Ratt, huh? Did they run out of Stryper?

I love that one song they did about rock and roll, and the music video where they were standing around with long curly hair and being all cut and playing their guitars while girls partied in front of a second film unit.

Oh god, one of those. Did you really say your favorite band was Rush? Canuck libertarians with a drummer for a lyricist – that’s your idea of a good time? Oh, no, I misheard you. … Wow, really? I’ve never heard someone make that misunderstanding worse.

Ratt? That’s sensible. Came with the shirt, right?

Yeah, I heard Foreigner concerts had some pretty serious standards. No shame in that.

I worked at a place once that had something like “Cowboy Friday”. Of course I grew out of playing pretend when I was in Junior High, so I never wore a hat.

One guy asks me: “Don’t you have a cowboy hat? You should get one.”

My reply: “No, I don’t. I don’t have a sailor suit either and don’t really think I should get one.”

He didn’t find that particularly funny for some reason. There’s nothing worse than dressing up like John Wayne and then taking that childish game seriously enough to be offended when someone gives you some (presumably) good natured shit about it.

Yeah, I heard Foreigner concerts

eck…i despise foreigner almost as much as i despise supertramp…which is a lot…

I do totally admire Ratt’s drummer. Say what you will, but could you play the drums that great – well – acceptably – passably with just one arm?

There’s nothing worse than dressing up like John Wayne and then taking that childish game seriously enough to be offended when someone gives you some (presumably) good natured shit about it.

fake harley people…

I do totally admire Ratt’s drummer. Say what you will, but could you play the drums that great – well – acceptably – passably with just one arm?

that’s def lepard…

The song was “Lay It Down” which should be available somewhere or other.

I believe a snippet of that was played last night.

My favorite KC songs:

What Doesn’t Kill You (Stronger)
Walk Away

Ratt, huh? Did they run out of Stryper?

Pssh. Ratt was MUCH cooler than Stryper. Funny joke though.

Reminds me of Beavis and Butthead commenting on an Accept video: “Here comes Krokus to kick their ass! huh huh huh huh huh”.

omg, my dad was sooooooo into Supertramp when I was, like, 6. It was part of the soundtrack of my childhood.

totes ot: tomorrow night my mom’s asshat husband is coming over to see if he can fix maxine…or at least get the data off the hard drive…i am not holding out any hope…it’s a conundrum for me:

i rlly, rlly, srsly do. not. like. him…and i believe he has finally caught on to this although he keeps trying to give me hugs and emails and tells me he loves me (shudder)…but i seriously need maxine back!!!

i guess the only thing to do is start drinking now…

omg, my dad was sooooooo into Supertramp when I was, like, 6. It was part of the soundtrack of my childhood.

*heebiejeebies*

fake harley people…

A Harley costs more than a year’s salary for anyone who isn’t an executive. All Harley people are fake as hell.

that’s def lepard…

Shit, you’re right. Ratt are the ones whose bassist did so much heroin his heart stopped, right?

And then they did a song about it, and some say that Pulp Fiction bit was based on it. I’m definitely thinking of Ratt.

A Harley costs more than a year’s salary for anyone who isn’t an executive. All Harley people are fake as hell.

our dentist who we refer to as dr. swedish milquetoast has several…i’m proud to have played a part in his midlife crisis…

Supertramp. I still REALLY like Goodbye Stranger. Something about that makes me sad and happy at the same time.

Ratt’s BESTEST song: You’re In Love. Next bestest: Lack of Communication.

I listen to quite a bit of Kelly Clarkson that I stole from my daughters. I also think she’s ridiculously cute.

totes ot: tomorrow night my mom’s asshat husband is coming over to see if he can fix maxine…or at least get the data off the hard drive

What’s it doing when you turn it on? Also, if all you care about is data recovery make sure you’ve got a hard drive you can schlep your data onto on another computer, buy a hard drive enclosure, and gingerly enclose it in there. They cost like $20 last I checked.

A hoot owl bit my sister once
and whitey’s on the moon.

Wiley FTW

Shit, you’re right. Ratt are the ones whose bassist did so much heroin his heart stopped, right?

That’s Nikki Sixx (note the WAY cool spelling, dawg) from Motley Crue. They also had a few badass songs. Like “Kickstart My Heart”, which appeared in a commercial with Adriana Lima, which kickstarted my wood.

“Kickstart My Heart”

In fact, hair-metal folklore has it that Kickstart My Heart is about Nikki Sixx’s infamous heroin incident.

I knew Ratt were the ones whose bus flipped over on their European tour, killing their original bassist. That was the joke.

and whitey’s on the moon.

Best album ever. It will not be brought to you commercial free, however.

What’s it doing when you turn it on? Also, if all you care about is data recovery make sure you’ve got a hard drive you can schlep your data onto on another computer, buy a hard drive enclosure, and gingerly enclose it in there. They cost like $20 last I checked.

she just makes a whirring noise…hubbkf has tried some sort of mac reader gizmo on it but that didn’t work…asshat thinks its something with a circuit board? we ordered a new one…and he’s going to do some sort of something or other with it…this whole experiment also includes my sister’s laptop which blew a motherboard or something…i dont know…i tune out usually when he starts talking…

i’m proud to have played a part in his midlife crisis…

Reaaaaally? Detailth, thithtah!

oh, also…IF we get the info from my hard drive…it is going immediately to the desktop hard drive, hubbkf’s external drive and my writing is going on my jump drive…and i will ALWAYS back the fuck up…

Reaaaaally? Detailth, thithtah!

uh…that would be your basic cleanings and the occasional cavity…perv…

I knew Ratt were the ones whose bus flipped over on their European tour, killing their original bassist. That was the joke.

LOL

THAT WAS METALLICA GODDAMNIT! You’re SO uncool. I’ll bet you don’t even have a jean jacket.

Now, I knew Adriana had had some work done, but…wow. And, of course, the boobies, too.

uh…that would be your basic cleanings and the occasional cavity…perv…

also, he always had something in my mouth, and i’m not sure what all he did in there…what can i say…i like the nitrous…

uh…that would be your basic cleanings and the occasional cavity…perv…

How did that contribute to the crisis? He had clean teeth and realized girls will talk to him now?

Best album ever. It will not be brought to you commercial free, however.

But will Dick get down with Jane?

How did that contribute to the crisis? He had clean teeth and realized girls will talk to him now?

i helped pay for the motherfuckin’ harleys that he had to have once he hit his fifties!!!

You need a screwdriver, patience, and a working knowledge of grounding to open up a computer and remove a hard drive. (If all else eludes you, just make sure at least one foot is firmly planted on the ground at all times, unless you’re in a high-rise or something.) Most tower computers have 3.5 inch HDDs, and most laptops have 2.5 inch HDDs. There are devices that fit both equally well. Depending on how recent your tower is, your hard drive is either (a) lodged in via special ratcheting rails, which aren’t too challenging to remove a device from, or (b) screwed in by little screws, which aren’t too tough to remove.

Make sure the screwdriver isn’t magnetized; it probably won’t hurt too bad if it is, but better safe than sorry. Make gentle moves with the hard drive, store if it at all possible the way it was oriented in the tower, and try to put it somewhere where it won’t be bumped or vibrated or otherwise agitated when you remove files from it.

Once you’ve got the hard drive out, you just have to put it in the enclosure (most include instructions) and connect the enclosure to your other computer with a USB cable. A 3.5 inch HDD won’t have a long working life this way (don’t count on more than 2-4 weeks outside of storage), 2.5 inch HDDs are fairly robust by design.

You can tell if a hard drive has a serious problem that would necessitate taking it to a data recovery facility if, when it tries to start up, there’s a repeated, quiet, insistent clicking noise. Not like tearing cloth (crrrk-crk crrrrrrrk), that’s normal, but more like click .. click … click. That’s the head reader – like a combination between VHS/tape head readers and the mounting of a gramophone needle, they’re very small and delicate and have to work at extremely high speeds and so are easily disrupted. (This is why you don’t want to shake a hard drive under any circumstances. A baby recovers better from that kind of thing. I’ve stupidly tried to shake dirt off of one before and then felt very dumb about it.)

I’m not too familiar with Mac thingies, but the same fundamental principles apply even though the design is radically different – 3.5in inclosure for a desktop, 2.5in enclosure for a laptop, pull all the data offa that thing ASAP, ground yourself, no magnets or shaking. Probably there’s tutorials online for taking apart iMacs – are those still a thing? I am out of touch.

But will Dick get down with Jane?

Perhaps, but there will be no pictures of pigs shooting down brothers in the instant replay.

Once you’ve got the hard drive out, you just have to put it in the enclosure (most include instructions) and connect the enclosure to your other computer with a USB cable. A 3.5 inch HDD won’t have a long working life this way (don’t count on more than 2-4 weeks outside of storage), 2.5 inch HDDs are fairly robust by design.

hubbkf has tried this…still no dice…he’s pretty good at this stuff, he be an engineer at our local pbs station…no insistent clicking noise…she just whirrs to life and then silence…

I’ve stupidly tried to shake dirt off of one before and then felt very dumb about it.)

a babby or a hard drive?

Probably there’s tutorials online for taking apart iMacs – are those still a thing? I am out of touch.

indeed there are…

Oh, and the appropriate USB cable almost always comes with the enclosure.

All you have to do is remove anything connecting the HDD to the computer at the motherboard end (i.e. leave it attached to the hard drive) and then connect it to the appropriate pins and dongles in the enclosure.

But will Dick get down with Jane?

“Look, Jane, look.
Look at my thing.”

“Oh, oh!
Your thing is little.
You have a little, little thing.”

“Take off your dress, Jane.
Take off your dress and look at my thing.”

“Oh, oh, oh!
Your thing is big.
Now you have a big, big thing.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oooooooh!!”

–Michael O’Donoghue

I may be too old to be mother. I nearly just did the splits on the arm of a chair tryin to get Dudeskull out from behind it.

a babby or a hard drive?

A hard drive. I have a strong editorial stance against baby-shaking. Waste of a good baby and a good shake.

hubbkf has tried this…still no dice…he’s pretty good at this stuff, he be an engineer at our local pbs station…no insistent clicking noise…she just whirrs to life and then silence…

Eesh. If he’s tried pulling stuff out via an enclosure and no dice at all I kind of suspect the only thing for it is a recovery facility – he could probably just pull off successfully putting the platters of one drive into another, but you only really get one shot at that and you don’t have a clean-room to do it in, so best to bite the bullet and pay around 50% more than the cost of an equivalent drive to make sure it gets done properly.

Eesh. If he’s tried pulling stuff out via an enclosure and no dice at all I kind of suspect the only thing for it is a recovery facility – he could probably just pull off successfully putting the platters of one drive into another, but you only really get one shot at that and you don’t have a clean-room to do it in, so best to bite the bullet and pay around 50% more than the cost of an equivalent drive to make sure it gets done properly.

i think this is the way he thinks it will be going…

Like, I came to an equivalent conclusion when we had a portable drive we needed have stuff fail on it – I could maybe pull off this kind of thing but even contemplating how many ways my fat oily fingers could fly astray and make the drive irreparable gave me goosebumps.

I may be too old to be mother. I nearly just did the splits on the arm of a chair tryin to get Dudeskull out from behind it.

it is amazing what contortions motherhood and babby safety can make you do…

On the other hand, if it’s just a matter of removing the drive and not the delicate inner workings of the drive, no reason not to fiddle with it. The assembly of computers is nowhere near as tricky as people make it sound, although at some point you’re bound to think “eh, no need for these spacer things” and accidentally short something out, so best fiddle with electronics you don’t care too much about.

I like nitrous, too, bbkf. But it can be overdone. When having three impacted wisdom teeth removed while being loaded up on nitrous during the semester that I took World Literature, I had to signal for them to turn it way down because I was hallucinating Dante’s Inferno as if John Carpenter were directing it and felt like I was about to leave my body.

Nothing too much.

bbkf, tell me about it. Plus, Dudeskull only seems REALLY interested in things that could potentially hurt him.

On the other hand, if it’s just a matter of removing the drive and not the delicate inner workings of the drive, no reason not to fiddle with it. The assembly of computers is nowhere near as tricky as people make it sound, although at some point you’re bound to think “eh, no need for these spacer things” and accidentally short something out, so best fiddle with electronics you don’t care too much about.

although, if asshat does all this, then perhaps i can score a new laptop out of him…

This one is the one I’m looking for. It helps that the music is essentially a Subcontinental version of the Good, The Bad, and the Ugly duel track.

Plus, Dudeskull only seems REALLY interested in things that could potentially hurt him.

this is a phase that he will grow out of by the time he hits middle age…if you’re lucky…

Dudeskull only seems REALLY interested in things that could potentially hurt him.

Time to ruin your day. For us boys, that NEVER goes away.

I was hallucinating Dante’s Inferno as if John Carpenter were directing it and felt like I was about to leave my body.

i would just be trippin balls on the stuff, giggle at my patheticness and then fall asleep…

bbkf, tell me about it. Plus, Dudeskull only seems REALLY interested in things that could potentially hurt him.

My parents’ favorite observation of this difficult period is that like a particularly intelligent dog, a toddler’s blossoming knowledge of causality means when they hurt themselves, they assume the first other person they saw did it.

So they didn’t exactly hide when one of us started crying, but they would try and make sure the other got there first.

this is a phase that he will grow out of by the time he hits middle age…if you’re lucky…

Didn’t we just discuss a 50 something dentist buying a Harley? That’s douchy danger.

tsam–D’oh!

alec–I chuckled. Warmly.

bbfk – glad someone else loathes Supertramp, too. Also, Styx.

uh – the anti-Supertramp – that was me.

and my Anonymous Badgers are dancing.

I just watched last night’s Colbert Report. The guest, Don McLeroy – the guy in charge of that Texas textbook debacle – is even more of a goddamned idiot than I could have imagined. Seriously, fuck that guy.

Colbert really made him look stupid(er). The audience was catching the snark and it was going right over his head.

bbfk – glad someone else loathes Supertramp, too. Also, Styx.

re: styx…eck…

Didn’t we just discuss a 50 something dentist buying a Harley? That’s douchy danger.

true…

What was he even trying to say with his “what does a rock dream about”, or whatever that nonsense was?

Styx is AWFUL.

Domo arigato Mr. Roboto
Domo (Domo)
Domo (Domo)….

Heh. Another FINE tune stuck in ya head!

What was he even trying to say with his “what does a rock dream about”, or whatever that nonsense was?

Sounds like the ramblings of a majorly stoned teenager. Probably sounded really fuckin heavy to him.

Dudeskull only seems REALLY interested in things that could potentially hurt him.

As others have pointed out, he is a boy, so: duh.

It’s never too early to get him started with this.

Oooh, and he’s gonna be big enough for this in no time!

And you are not allowed to buy him this, you must buy him something more like this..

Hmm. That sure is a lot of “this” isn’t that? Yes, this.

OBS’s omission

I agree tsam, smedley and histrogeek. Don’t expect the MSM or even the so called left media to show any outrage against the way the right bashes working women on a daily basis. I tried to make that point earlier, but got accused of clutching pearls and treated with other bullshit dismissiveness.

And don’t even SAY it. NOBODY shoots their eye out. They always shoot someone else’s eye out, so no worries, VS. You can even make play dates with BB guns for kids you don’t like…

I tried to make that point earlier, but got accused of clutching pearls and treated with other bullshit dismissiveness.

Here?

I just think if the media would tell the goddamn truth once in a while things might get better. But with a corporate owned media that has a seriously unhealthy obsession with these political races, they’re mostly looking to sell gear, not act as the mythological Fourth Estate.

“Wildfire” is pretty much the most gruesome song ever – however, there are “Indiana Wants Me” and “Me and You and a Dog Named Boo”. They are fierce competitors.

Oh, there are songs that beat the crap out of “Wildfire” and “Me and You…”

Let’s start with the entire Beach Boys anthology.

Or how about “Allll Byyyyyy Myyyyysehelllf. Don’t wanna be, allll byyyy myeeyself, anuhmoe….”

Just typing that shit is giving me the dry heaves and a curious rash.

Sappy ballad guilty pleasure:

Forever Young by Alphaville.

“All By Myself” is pretty howlerrific. Beach Boys do have those kick-ass harmonies.

“Young Girl, Get Out of My Mind”

Re: Here?

Oh, yes. See 4/24 @ 1:15

They’re good harmonies, but Ba ba ba ba barbra ann, ba ba ba ba barbra ann…

Come on now. That shit was absolutely contemptible.

Journey is another band who could be erased from culture and not missed.

Ratt will always amuse me for persuading Milton Berle to be in one of their music videos.

Re: Here?

Oh, yes. See 4/24 @ 1:15

I read that earlier but thought it was directed more at the media and their willingness to clutch their pearls over things like deficits (when Dems are in office) and pretty much snicker and laugh when reporting just how awful these fuckers treat women. I could have misunderstood though…

Yes – Ratt’s manager was Milton Berle’s nephew.

I’ve been looking back at what Don McLeroy said, and I think I understand what he was attempting to get at.

He was saying that “something can’t come from nothing.” The rock crap was to illustrate the concept of “nothingness” by saying that (paraphrasing) “nothing is what a rock dreams of.” I think if he wanted to better illustrate the concept of “nothingness”, he should have pointed to the empty void that exists between his ears.

I took it to mean anyone who uses the phrase “where’s the outrage?” is just clutching pearls and not serious about what is allegedly so outrageous. wev

Ahh, this reminds me of the horrors of the YouTube wars long ago. Think of the civilian casualties before you go down that path.

RWW: It was not my intent to accuse you of clutching pearls. I was suggesting that it’s foolhardy to read the right-wing pearl-clutchery as sincere, ever, no matter how passionate it is, because it’s just political theater. They need a dedicated class of people who (a) have so little shame they can genuinely fake offense at trivial bullshit and who (b) treat the latest drummed-up wingnut outrage as a Serious Concern worthy of Serious Discussion.

Journey was dorky but lovable. Plus Steve Perry had an amazeballs voice.

Geez guys, what do you thInk girls do–sit around in frilly dresses with their thumbs up their asses?

Where’s the Dangerous Book for Girls?

Geez guys, what do you think girls do–sit around in frilly dresses with their thumbs up their asses?

Isn’t that what everybody does?

…

Guys? Isn’t it?

…

The point I was trying to make, clumsily, is that no one gives two shits about any of this, least of which anyone in the media. This is especially true of Republicans, but I’m not going to bet money that Rosen cared last year or will care next year about Ann Romney having the gall to claim to speak for stay-at-home mothers (I assume she’ll go back to caring mostly whether 13-year-olds can be sued for a million dollars for downloading a Tori Amos song).

My wider point is that this campaign has been a series of surreal non-events, which simultaneously dismisses the real issue (to my mind, the fact that Romney is a mega-rich sociopathic fuck who lusts after austerity and Obama is a regular-rich self-important fuck who can be easily bullied into austerity) and erodes actual campaign events in significance.

Here’s an example: this faked outrage over Rosen? The media’s been treating it about as seriously as Herman Cain, at that time the Anybody But Romney frontrunner, forcing himself sexually on an underling. If it turned out tomorrow that Romney ran over a hobo and paid the Worcester County sherriff’s department to cover it up, it’d be treated just as significantly as someone peripherally connected to Obama saying mean but true things about a rich lady, and would be just as easily displaced by some thrown-together story about creative accounting in the Small Business Administration or something.

Political spectacle is the worst thing.

This reminded me of this which made me think of this.

If anyone calls to request this song, bbkf, consider it a sign of the coming Apocalypse.

The synthesizer solo that sounds like farting in the bath tub defies all musical reason. How is it that such things are produced, distributed and promoted without someone talking them out of it? That is only less mysterious than the fact that listening to that single on the radio would inspire people to buy the album. Were they not sufficiently warned?

Alec, thanks for the clarifying and I agree with you. I apologize for my misread of your comment.

I mean, here are some things we haven’t been talking about:

1) Increasing traction against the Stand Your Ground law – cookie-cuttered into several different states by ALEC – in response to continued outrage over the Trayvon Martin shooting, selective persecution of black defendants under similar circumstances, (unfortunately) the killing of white teenagers, etc.
2) ALEC busily and with little impediment laying legal groundwork for companies to override the decisions of their stockholders (violating the whole raison d’etre of corporate personhood) in order to continue spending money on movementarian politics.
3) (With one exception, two threads ago), the National Front in France – a nuclear power with millions of Muslim immigrants – outperforming the 2002 numbers that allowed them to enter the runoff.
4) The continued simmering revolt of Europe against the ECB, whose austerian policies we now have specific numbers to denounce (ex. the “1 euro in austerity = .40 euro in deficit reduction” stat, suggesting horrendous multiplier effects).
5) The strange urgency with which states around the country are repealing equal wage laws, passing unambiguously unconstitutional restrictions on abortion, and generally trying to turn back the clock on American women to 1919. Yeah, that “transvaginal ultrasound” blowup? That’s not just a thing we all got together and won forever. Shit’s only getting worse before it gets better.
6) Voter suppression, nationally – attempts to legally or sublegally remove young, ethnic, and female voters from the polls in November.
7) The Republican war on progressive tax stepping into high gear at a time when most Americans are for increased progressive taxation.
8) The revelation that Christie – NJ’s Great White Semi-Bagger Hope – scrapped one of the country’s largest infrastructure projects to avoid raising a gasoline tax for purely personal reasons, then lied about cost overruns to save face. Came out a few days before the Rosen story, and has been completely buried by it. If you’re in the NYC metro, this has made your life appreciably worse and ought to be the single biggest story going.
9) Finally, and least concidentally, May Day is a week from now – the cops and the feds don’t have their eyes off the ball here, and yet we do.

So… yeah, how about them mommy wars?

“My reply: ‘No, I don’t [have a cowboy hat]. I don’t have a sailor suit either and don’t really think I should get one.'”–tsam

But if you were a sailor at heart, see, they couldn’t fault you for wearing the sailor suit. The modern urban sailor doesn’t take to the sea, or tie knots, drink grog, or eat hardtack. His outlook is that of a sailor. The essence, the instincts of the eternal sailor, are applied without pretense to the business of, say, Facebooking, or running a WalMart in North Dakota. Even without the sailor suit, other seafaring types can tell that he’s a sailor. When he wears the hat, only landlubbers see anachronism.

Geez guys, what do you think girls do–sit around in frilly dresses with their thumbs up their asses?
– – – – – – – –
Isn’t that what everybody does?… Guys? Isn’t it?

domn”t be reddeculos!!1 no one couulds type wit theyr tyhumbvs oin ther vuttt

But if you were a sailor at heart, see, they couldn’t fault you for wearing the sailor suit. The modern urban sailor doesn’t take to the sea, or tie knots, drink grog, or eat hardtack. His outlook is that of a sailor. The essence, the instincts of the eternal sailor, are applied without pretense to the business of, say, Facebooking, or running a WalMart in North Dakota. Even without the sailor suit, other seafaring types can tell that he’s a sailor. When he wears the hat, only landlubbers see anachronism.

My go-to story about why I moved from Las Vegas, NV to Portland, OR was that I was going to Olive Garden for a date (red flag already, but bear with me) and not two tables away there was a man who weighed like six hundred pounds and had a black Stetson on. You know, indoors, in the Olive Garden, on his fat head.

Like a cowboy, but a dark and serious cowboy. Just like every Olive Garden has shitty overpriced Italian, and every cowboy wheezes going up the stairs, every rose has its thorns.

And that’s why I left Nevada.

Oh HuffPo, how many more fails?

Tinfoil-hatters have mused that Lady Arianna Of Teh Clickthroughs is (& has always been) a vital part of an uncompromised RNC sleeper cell. Who can blame them? The sheer unending harmlessness of HuffPo to the extremist GOP agenda calls Hanlon’s razor into doubt.

Seconding Susan Faludi as mandatory reading … & her next book after Backlash was an exposition on all the ways in which American males were/are being pooched by the current trend to a GloboMall™ paradigm. By making rock-solid theses stick with clarity & raw power, Faludi shit-disturbs in print LIKE A BOSS.

Also, let’s not even get into my boiling outrage over UNLV hosting two separate fucking rodeo events, and billboards and apparel trying to suggest that Vegas, a momo whistle-stop in alkaline bighorn scrub, was Cowboy Country USA. Probably the first anyone thought to rope anything here was one fine night in 1955 when a big-wig on the rodeo circuit had a great night at the Dunes and got kinky with his “date”, but never mind. We are all cowboys here!! Welcome to cowboy!!!

F L A V O R _ C O U N T R Y

Most cowboys actually wore bowler hats.

Bowlers are cool.

bbfk – glad someone else loathes Supertramp, too. Also, Styx.

Oh dear. I’m embarrassed to admit that I actually liked Styx back in the 1970s.

Fortunately I got over it.

That neon cowboy is creepy, alec. Lookit his face.

I liked Styx when I was a little kid (I’m 40). The one band that never ever did anything for me but annoy was KISS. Not because I am totally outside their target audience; I like me some whatever. But I remember being just a little guy and seeing a KISS poster on a neighbor girl’s wall and thinking, give me a break, are they trying to be bad? I was not a bad kid, but I had a very rough childhood, and I just didn’t have time for that, somehow.

At that time I would take my parents’ speakers and make a little box out of them on the floor to stick my head into. Then I would crank Led Zep IV or Deep Purple, maybe Sgt. Pepper’s or even Johnny Cash (“Boy Named Sue” was a favorite). Good times.

Yep – that’s the good stuff!

A huge second on KISS. One of the all time shittiest bands. It wouldn’t be so bad if people just went to their live shows, but why they gotta play that ipecac on the radio? And why do people have to say they were good? Why is that arrogant piece of skunk shit Simmons on the gotdamn teevee? They are to music what lousy paintings of wolves and buffaloes are to art.

My thoughts exactly, tsam. Yes, I can see how some people might really enjoy a KISS show. It’s a show.

Al Franken did a nice bit on NPR with Terry Gross describing HIS encounter with Simmons. Gross, you may know, interviewed Simmons and got an earful about how he has a poli sci degree, isn’t stupid, and has a long tongue that’s good for cunnilingus, on her even.

It turns out Al Franken kicked Simmons’ ass at racketball, then had to repeat the performance, because Simmons is such a competitive prick that losing once wasn’t enough. Unless I misremember.

http://www.npr.org/programs/specials/driveway/archive/2005/may/050531.html

You may fire when ready, boys! Blow this dump to Hell!

PS. I don’t actually like KISS.

A huge second on KISS. One of the all time shittiest bands.

I wouldn’t say they were that bad.

Let’s just say that if it wasn’t for their stage-show today they’d be playing the Akron Civic Center with Bachman Turner Overdrive.

Oooooooohhhhh, we’re soooo scared! Please don’t play a bunch of shitty music and wear clown makeup and stick out your tongue at us!

At that time I would take my parents’ speakers and make a little box out of them on the floor to stick my head into. Then I would crank Led Zep IV or Deep Purple.

We may have been separated at birth … did the exact same thing: The Song Remains The Same and Deep Purple’s Machine Head.
Ah, good times.

Hello sad times, so good bad times
We are back to you at last
Fuck you gay times, welcome gray times
You are now a thing again!

Mommy wars are here again
The media all froths again
So let’s sing a song of cheer again
Mommy wars are here again

Altogether, shout it now, there’s no one
Who can doubt it now
So let’s tell the world about it now
Mommy wars are here again

Your cares and troubles are back
There’ll be more from every hack,every hack

Mommy wars are here again
The skies above are drear again
So let’s sing a song of cheer again
Mommy times, mommy nights
Mommy wars are here again!

Haha! Spear chucks in the disclaimer! I wouldn’t want a reputation for liking them either.

I used to like Black Sabbath and Blue Oyster Cult (needs more cowbell). Pretty sure my dad thought I was worshipping the devil.

I only joined the KISS Army to protect myself from the Juggalo Army. Those guys have been making a lot of strides with their magnet-based weaponry. After they figured out how the things worked, they became unstoppable.

Dammit I can’t get that Al Franken NPR bit to play. A .wax file, WTF.

Mommy wars are here again
Before the summer evening’s glow
She got no power she go no flower
She’s a mommy after all

Gross, you may know, interviewed Simmons and got an earful about how he has a poli sci degree, isn’t stupid, and has a long tongue that’s good for cunnilingus, on her even.

Second in the pantheon of all time great NPR moments only to Bill OReilly storming out of his interview with mean old hard-ass Terry Gross.

Also, re: KISS … I would venture to say they have inspired as many great rock and roll performers as ever the sainted Velvet Underground did. Ryan Adams, Dimebag Darrell from Pantera and the godly Paul Westerberg to name but three …

I don’t know if that’s just his schtick, but he came off like a totally self-absorbed prick in that interview.

Sorry D-KW, that had nothing to do with you.

Chicken paprikash. Spaetzle. Garden salad. Strawberries with ice cream.

Most cowboys actually wore bowler hats.

What the real cowpokes wore.

“Also, re: KISS … I would venture to say they have inspired as many great rock and roll performers as ever the sainted Velvet Underground did. Ryan Adams, Dimebag Darrell from Pantera and the godly Paul Westerberg to name but three …”–Lexicon Devil.

You got me there. I dunno how many times I’ve heard somebody I respect say “I was into KISS.” Alot, I mean.

I like a bunch of Kiss songs, including the entire Destroyer album. That last probably has to do with having a tyrant for a producer.

Most cowboys actually wore bowler hats.

I think cowboy was actually a pretty shitty low-paying job and quite a few them were black, because hardly anybody else wanted to do it.

Pitchfork: The kinds of bands you grew up with, stuff like the Stones or Kiss, how did that translate into the first Replacements record? It doesn’t really sound like any of those sorts of acts at all.

Paul Westerberg: Having a diverse sense of taste– or lack of taste– I loved so many different things. I was drawn to the stupidity and excitement of glam.

As they said about the Velvet Underground, only 300 people bought their records, but every one of them went on to form a band. Nine million people bought KISS Alive!, and a shit-ton of them went on to form bands. So yeah, depending on who you respect, I would say a lot of them would admit to like KISS. A lot.
This, of course, is just my opinion. It’s not like, scientific or nothing.

Nice. I think my distaste for KISS had something to do with my “serious” tastes even as a little boy. Musically, I was a humorless and dead-earnest nozzle until maybe my early twenties. It didn’t hurt me in terms of discovering classic stuff. But if you coulda told that teen me I’d be listening to X, Y, and Z with unironic pleasure, well, he’d have shit himself.

Way it goes: I discovered Devo and didn’t listen to Deep Purple for another twenty years. Why? Cause kids are idiots, that’s why. And also, I found one more thing to cement my argument.

Mike Watt: “And Kiss was on there. They did Firehouse, Black Diamond and Nothin’ to Lose, before they had their first album out, and we recorded it. I would tape ‘em all. Show you what a primitive asshole I was, I’d tape ‘em right off the TV. Ya know-WHOOOO-big ol’ hum and everything. And I learned them songs, and we were doing Kiss before there was a Kiss album. And Gene Simmons has a lot to do with the way I play bass. He really does, that slidin’ stuff.”
And now my work is done.

I avoid discussions over musical taste and I have no particular interest in KISS as a band, but Gene Simmons fucking creeps me out. The guy exudes an unpleasant combination of megalomania and soullessness.

The narrative of Detroit Rock City ends with a celebratory death via car crash. You could be mopey to that one.

I remember going to see Twisted Sister in a smallish club in Queens before they wore spandex and makeup. Don’t remember why.

No question that Gene Simmons appears to be genuinely awful. But, you know, he’s the lord of the wasteland, so what can you do?

I want to rock and roll all day and party ever-y night, thank you very much.

Oh dear. I’m embarrassed to admit that I actually liked Styx back in the 1970s.

Dennis Whatshisname, the Styx lead singer, grew up two towns over from me. I never heard of him until he hit the big time, but apparently he was big in the club scene near my hometown.

Dennis Whatshisname, the Styx lead singer,

Izzat the one that changed gender?

The guy from Rush used to cut my sister’s hair. No, wait, that was … ah, forget it.

Spontaneous gender change? That would be interesting.

Sometimes when people spontaneously combust, there’s, like, nothin’ left but a pristine foot.

When they change genders, it’s a dick, I guess.

“Detachable Penis” in 3, 2, 1 …

So tired, so little time to be online to dick around. BUT KNOW THIS: I already love this job, and am certain that will continue for a good while. Loads of fun, lots of learning, lots of joking and socializing, and really interesting work. Just not used to the new steel-toed boots and the standing and walking most of the day, but that will soon not be an exhaustion-causing factor, I hope.

More on Saturday.
.

Spontaneous gender change? That would be interesting.

It could cause problems if it happened during a job interview.

Detachable Penis

8

====D

They do say Spider-Man can do “anything a spider can.” Hmmm.

Alright, I’m going to the pub—happy Anzac Day, ya’ll.

*whatever a spider can.

Spontaneous gender change?

Surely you mean a “gender bender”.

Surely you mean a “gender bender”.

That spinoff of Avatar: The Last Airbender went in a really weird direction.

Not going to use this for a post, because I think I’m done on Trayvon Martin stories for a bit, but Lloyd Marcus is doing his best Clayton Bigsby impression by cashing in the rest of his morality and going all in for Zimmerman.

It really is something to see: Link here.

I m so not re-telling my massive kiss/skateboard wipeout story again…

DOES LOU REED HAVE A REALITY SHOW? No further questions m’lud.

No, but there was that sit-com he wrote in the 70s with Lester Bangs

It sounds like a good idea, Cerberus, not to write anymore about Trayvon Martin and Zimmerman, right now.

I keep thinking of an episode of the 1973 TV show Kojak: The Marcus-Nelson Murders. Homicide detective Kojak suspects that the black teenager accused of murdering two white girls is being framed by his fellow detectives.

~Loyd Marcus

Mein Gott! It’s like he has no black experience to draw from.

DOES LOU REED HAVE A REALITY SHOW?

Ironically enough, Lou Reed is illiterate.

Cerb — killer post, from the cartoon and caption all of the way through. My single mom worked, raised us, and got her Masters’ of the Arts — after having been raised to be a stay-at-home mom! I’d love to see Mrs. Rmoney — or any other Stepford Republican wife — do anything even remotely close.

When I was in Flight Engineer school for the 727, the instructor kept saying “Mr. Boeing doesn’t like a single point of failure”.

WOW. From now onwards, we must reverently call you “Major Checklist”! What’s our vector, Victor?

And you are of course correct — we don’t allow a single-point failure to endanger an aircraft a pilot’s hairdo.

(Are you like every other five-seven jock I’ve met, who asks me to re-start production of their beloved aerial hot-rod? Sadly, No! Not only did we shut down the 757 line, we tore down the factory and sold the land for condos.)

DOES LOU REED HAVE A COLLABORATION WITH KISS UNDER HIS BELT?

Journey was dorky but lovable. Plus Steve Perry had an amazeballs voice.

When Journey was good. (Pre-Perry.)

Don’t bother w/ the blog-pimpin’, the videos have been removed. Fucking fascists!

But, a joke review that resulted in a real album, which I like.

Watching Life of Brian on IFC, just had to comment on how the “what have the Romans ever done for us” scene – this is the wingnut mentality at its essence.

Brian even misspelled his protest graffiti. The Tea Party is the PFJ.

Also, seeing as it seems to be music day today …

Levon Helm, R.I.P. If there’s a Rock’n’Roll Heaven, you know they got 3/5ths of The Band.

“what have the Romans ever done for us” scene – this is the wingnut teabagger mentality at its essence.

F’zd., for greater teabaggy-ness.

Splitters!

ALSO LOU REED HAS NEVER INSPIRED A WRESTLER CHARACTER!

No, but I believe John Cale is skilled in the deadly art of Llap-Goch.

Then again, I got no cred: A fan of both KISS and Lou Reed and I still never knew they collaborated. Sheesh, who said ignorance is bliss?

I see Kiss was dissed upthread.

I HATE YOU PEOPLE AND I HOPE YOU ALL DIE!

Now…good morning!

BTW, true story about KISS…When I was little, there was a drug/sundries store that had a record section…and I could not walk past the KISS albums because they scared me so much. Which is so funny because as kid that young I had no idea people like Marilyn Manson awaited me in adulthood.

The record sleeves are coming FROM INSIDE THE MILK CRATE!

Lol–exactly.

Are you like every other five-seven jock I’ve met, who asks me to re-start production of their beloved aerial hot-rod?

Yes please!

A few years back Boeing offered to sell us (Global Package Delivery Company) brand new 757s because they wanted to keep the production line open. We foolishly turned them down.

Now we’re trying to buy as many of the things as we can get our hands on and we’re having to buy used ones from wherever we can get them.

We did recently take them up on the offer to sell us brand new 767s, since they’re keeping that line open to build the new Air Force tanker.

Tonight I’m making Indian-spiced meatballs in a tomato-ginger sauce.

I’m freaked out about eating beef since I read on a news crawl that pretty much any amount is bad for you.

And because of that, I did a cooking experiment a couple weeks ago. I made a variation of Sunday Gravy (which traditionally uses beef and pork meats) and replaced that with poultry and pork. A white Sunday Gravy if you will. It turned out amazingly, though the taste–because it was made with poultry–definitely veered into Cacciatore territory.

Oh. I forgot to specify “turkey” meatballs.

You could substitute ground lamb for ground beef in most Indian or Middle Eastern themed recipes. Most of them probably used lamb originally – since beef isn’t that common in those places anyway.

Indian Muslims will eat beef, but Hindus generally will not.

I used turkey because that’s what I had on hand.

AC oddly wanted hand to be Hans, which is weird cuz I can’t think of any reason to put ground turkey on Hans.

Rule 34?

Sorry D-KW, that had nothing to do with you.

It is killing me that there’s a Mommy Wars thread going on, and I’m too busy to participate fully. I had a real zinger about how stay-at-home moms could still be working (IYKWIMAITTYD) but my heart wasn’t in it.

It’s never your heart that’s in it anyway.

Wow. I didn’t like Paula Deen before, but this is really awful:

http://wonkette.com/tag/pt-the-south-shall-rise-again

I can’t help but feel like it’s unfair to imply that Paula Deen is responsible for the racist things her brother says.

(You can still blame her for freezing Han Solo in carbonite, though.)

guess who i got to interview this morning?!?!? richard young!!!

Who? Father knows best?

he’s a kentucky headhunter…

vacuumslayer said,

April 25, 2012 at 2:01 (kill)

Where’s the Dangerous Book for Girls?

Sorry, you girlish types are absolutely not allowed to be dangerous, you may only be daring.

alec said,

April 25, 2012 at 2:29 (kill)

My go-to story about why I moved from Las Vegas, NV to Portland, OR was that I was…

Yet another Oregon Sadlynaught? We’re taking over!

Oh, and I went through a phase where I liked KISS in about 1977 or so… Whenever the “Alive II” double album came out.

I got over it after I turned 10.

In my neighborhood growing up there was a psychotic neighbor kid that used to insist on dressing up in Gene Simmons’ makeup all the time and spending every waking moment drawing the KISS logo on any surface. He got over that eventually and then became obsessed with the “The Incredible Hulk” TV show. Used to paint himself green and tear his clothes up and randomly go completely berserk and chase the other kids. Quite the charming young lad.

he’s a kentucky headhunter…

They allow headhunting in Kentucky? I am so putting that at the top of my adventure vacation list!

Wow. I didn’t like Paula Deen before, but this is really awful:

http://wonkette.com/tag/pt-the-south-shall-rise-again

While the link is really much more about Molly McButter’s brother than her, I can’t really say I’m surprised to hear that a rich white Savannah family is full of a bunch of racist fucks.

Y’all.

Substance McGravitas said,

April 25, 2012 at 2:07 (kill)

This reminded me of this which made me think of this.

Oh dear FSM, will this be a repeat of the Great Creed War of Oh Eight!? Oh, the humanity!

The thread is mine I tell you! Mine!!!! Hahhahahhahh!

I can’t help but feel like it’s unfair to imply that Paula Deen is responsible for the racist things her brother says.

She owns a business. Complaints were made, and according to the complaint, Deen herself knew of them. She took no action. The harassments continued.

That makes her responsible for her employees’ actions, brother or not.

Hmm, I coulda sworn I smelled the troll. Nah, just badgers.

Sorry, you girlish types are absolutely not allowed to be dangerous, you may only be daring.

Yay! That’s pretty awesome.

I have a bug up my butt about the “boys will be boys” meme because it always makes me think that people think that girls are passive, barely-there participants in life. I remember my “girl’s life” being remarkably rich and full of running around, mischief, make-believe, video games, Mad Libs, cheerleading, daydreaming about fairies, and chasing my naked baby brother around house, screaming so loud we’d be told to hush. My friends and I weren’t passive little girls. We had SHIT TO DO.

My evidence that women are courageous risk-takers is only anecdotal, but let me proceed anyway: some have had sex with me.

None have sex with me.

Ha! I just proved you all wrong! Where’s my medal?

Now let me perform my totally original stand up material:

“Men and women are different!”

That’ll really blow them away at the ChuckleHut open mic night.

If Nigvon was really “murdered”, why doesn’t it say so in this unrelated news story?

Adress my point, libs.

My evidence that women are courageous risk-takers is only anecdotal, but let me proceed anyway: some have had sex with me.

Well, unless you two penises or scales or something, I’m not sure I’m ready to label that as courageous.

Spear, you’re an incredibly bright funny guy. And genuinely NICE guy. IT’S GONNA HAPPEN.

Now let me perform my totally original stand up material:

That’ll really blow them away at the ChuckleHut open mic night.

Oh, come on, that crap is comedy gold. *barfs*

oh my…i see there is much to catch up on…i have been in the doc’s office all morning…girl appointments suck…

and i didn’t even get dinner out of the deal…

I’m not sure I’m ready to label that as courageous.

They had to drink a LOT.

Not buyin’ it, Substance!

Olive Garden. I used to go there every now and then. For lunch. The soups were usually good enough and the soup and salad lunch was a good price. It was fun to be a skinny fuck and go through two or three salad servings, four or five soups and consume a fair number of those execrable breadsticks. Often went twith another skinny-as-fuck friend who would consume similar quantities. The looks we got from the wait staff and other customers was good entertainment. The overheard conversations were priceless.

Did you ever notice that skinny guys can really pack it in? (NOT a VB-SR) I recall a time when I was in college, skinny as fuck and extremely poor. I’ve told my Roy Rogers story before, I know – this is not that story. I came into some small amount of money, enough to feed me for a couple days anyway. I went down to the Corner Room and sat at the counter then consumed a cheeseburger platter (fries and slaw), a bowl of clam chowder with a couple slices buttered house-made sourdough, a side of onion rings, a salad, TWO chocolate milkshakes and was working on a grilled sticky with ice cream when the waitress asked the two plumpish matrons next to me if they wanted dessert. They had been watching me with what seemed to be fascination and disgust for some time. The one said “Oh I’d love to but I’m counting calories.” I leaned over and said “Me too! So far today I’ve had 4850.” She was not amused.

Did you ever notice that skinny guys can really pack it in?

Back in my younger, skinnier, days I’d routinely order in a medium pizza for lunch and eat the whole thing. Or stop at Taco Bell and eat 7 or 8 tacos.

Now I’m not quite as skinny (140ish vs. 125ish) but can still pretty much eat what I want, I just prefer to eat good stuff in smaller quantities. I then make up for the missing calories with good beer.

HAHAHAHA

“If you think I’ve worked this hard to lose everything because of a piece of pussy, you better think again.” – Paula Deen

HAHAHAHAHA

Batter the piece of pussy with a flour-and-butter mixture and deep fry, then dredge in icing sugar and corn flakes. YUM.

“If you think I’ve worked this hard to lose everything because of a piece of pussy, you better think again.” – Paula Deen Tweetie Bird

“I owe just as much on this fucking restaurant as I do on that fucking restaurant so you better work together.” – Paula Deen

“How do I get these motherfucking snakes out of my motherfucking restaurant?” – Paula Deen.

“Well what I would really like is a bunch of little niggers to wear long-sleeve white shirts, black shorts. and black bow ties, you know in the Shirley Temple days they used to dance around.” – Paula Deen

Did you ever notice that skinny guys can really pack it in?

yes, i call these heinous people my brothers…they got the good genes…

they got the good genes…

Or a tapeworm.

Skinny people who can eat whatever they want should be slapped. Repeatedly. By me.

When I weighed 160lbs for 15 years, I could eat whatever I want. Now I weigh 190lbs and have to be careful what I eat.

Getting older has put a check on the overeating anyway. I get so miserable when I stuff myself full of food now that I avoid it consistently.

Although I’m proud of my exercise routine, such as it is now. When you have a baby, options are fairly limited, so I use our walks as a chance to power-walk. I figured it was a pretty good workout when I took hubby along one time (a skinny dude who runs a few times a week) and he got a little winded. SCORE!

Or a tapeworm.

one night we watched in awe as my runty brother, who had been consuming grain belt premium all afternoon, consume the ‘steak for 2’ meal at the supper club i bartend at…so, he’s drank who knows how many beers, goes through the salad bar twice, eats a basket of bread, all 32oz. of sirloin and both potatoes…then we went to the bar where he ordered another beer and a bag of peanut m&ms…

I remember going to see Twisted Sister in a smallish club in Queens before they wore spandex and makeup. Don’t remember why.

You thought they were a female contortionist act? IBiMB

Skinny people who can eat whatever they want should be slapped. Repeatedly. By me.

tag team?

tag team?

Let’s terrorist fist-jab to that!

one night we watched in awe as my runty brother, who had been consuming grain belt premium all afternoon, consume the ‘steak for 2? meal at the supper club i bartend at…so, he’s drank who knows how many beers, goes through the salad bar twice, eats a basket of bread, all 32oz. of sirloin and both potatoes…then we went to the bar where he ordered another beer and a bag of peanut m&ms…

I don’t really consider my appetite dainty…but I really don’t understand how people eat like that, just, logistically. It doesn’t even sound fun to me.

I don’t really consider my appetite dainty…but I really don’t understand how people eat like that, just, logistically. It doesn’t even sound fun to me.

right?!?!?

It’s been years, and I don’t eat like that anymore, but I’ve finished a 24 oz burger in under ten minutes.

It’s easier with hamburger, as you can form it into the proper shapes to play Tetris in your large bowel.

What?

vacuumslayer said,

April 25, 2012 at 20:25 (kill)

Skinny people who can eat whatever they want should be slapped. Repeatedly. By me.

Sweet! Do I get to choose the “cheek” that gets slapped?

bbkf said,

tag team?

Oh my! [swoon]

I don’t really consider my appetite dainty…but I really don’t understand how people eat like that, just, logistically. It doesn’t even sound fun to me.

Yeah, even though I could still eat like that, I don’t. It’s just not fun feeling all bloated and gross for a few hours afterward. I guess I finally figured out that quality is much more important than quantity. See e.g., beer, see also: snob.

Sweet! Do I get to choose the “cheek” that gets slapped?

Yea, but it has to be one of yours. What I’m saying is I am not slapping Ross Douthat, OBS!

It’s easier with hamburger

One buffet lunch, I put away a pound (cooked weight) of bacon. As garnish on other food.

A pound of ground beef – topped with bacon.
A couple slices of pizza – topped with bacon.
A pound of fettucini in cream sauce – quickie carbonara style.

Yea, but it has to be one of yours. What I’m saying is I am not slapping Ross Douthat, OBS!

Douthat is going to be a guest on Friday’s Brian Lehrer show- I think it would be interesting to hear what he sounds like- I imagine he has a high, flutey voice.

Yea, but it has to be one of yours.

That’s what I was counting on.

What I’m saying is I am not slapping Ross Douthat, OBS!

What, not even on basic principle?

I don’t know what I’d do with the sullied hand. Cauterize it, I suppose.

slapping the douthat…

A pound of ground beef

Roast beef. Too much hamburger on teh brain.

Things you can do in a free country.

ya know, my soyosiidh mother and asshat are coming over for supper tonight…i planned on a porkloin roast on the grill, garlic mashies and vs’ mommy’s salad…now i just wish i would have planned on bacon…

also, too…if you were invited to someone’s house for supper, and that someone then relayed to you the day of, that they were having some sewer issues and could you come later? wouldn’t you have the good grace to just re-schedule? show of hands?

also, we do not live next to a roto-rooter…hubbkf has to tackle it on his own…

bbkf said,
April 25, 2012 at 21:00

slapping the douthat…

If that’s what you think of masturbation, you need to practice more or maybe get a copy of “Wanking 101”.

I think it would be interesting to hear what he sounds like- I imagine he has a high, flutey voice.

Naw, he just sounds like a doofus.

http://www.npr.org/2012/04/14/150437554/heretics-the-crisis-of-american-christianity

If that’s what you think of masturbation, you need to practice more or maybe get a copy of “Wanking 101?.

ha, ha…i just threw that one out there to gross out vs…

Grossing the VS.

Naw, he just sounds like a doofus.

eck…i just listened…he sounds even doofier than a doofus…

What I’m saying is I am not slapping Ross Douthat, OBS!

That depends on what I get to slap him with.

2 x 4?
Crowbar?
Tire Iron?

That depends on what I get to slap him with.

2 x 4?
Crowbar?
Tire Iron?

chunky reese witherspoon?

Hey, lemme know how the salad turns out, bbkf!

Now, I’m going to sign off for a bit and try to forget that mOnstrosity of a burger. And I am not talking about Jonah Goldberg.

Slapping Ross would accomplish nothing. I don’t think it is actually possible to beat sense into a person. If it were, half of the curriculum of elementary schools would be educational beatings. Which is not to say hitting Ross would accomplish nothing, for example if you were to employ a heavy enough club, it might be good exercise.

Anyway, beating Ross is counter productive. Think of all of the dope watchers out there that would love to get a picture of a slack-jawed Jesus-mazed god-botherer in it natural habitat. Look at the Plumage!

Look at the Plumage!

sounds much better than ‘neckbeard’

I don’t really consider my appetite dainty…but I really don’t understand how people eat like that, just, logistically. It doesn’t even sound fun to me.

That’s a step up from those “if you can finish this obscenely oversized steak/sundae/whatever in X amount of time, you don’t have to pay for it” restaurant specials. Which is a step up from “competitive eating” contests. Which is a step up from wallowing in your own feces, as far as I’m concerned.

Here’s some great news ladies. That is assuming you needed a male doctor to find it for you.

I don’t want to beat Ross Douhat. I just wish he and the rest of those Christianist fuckwits would simply practice their religion, which actually has a lot going for it, and stop obsessing over the beliefs and behavior of others.

which actually has a lot going for it

[citation needed]

He’s not allowed to do such “forensic” procedures on bodies in the US and Canada, and although Poland’s a long way to go in search of the G-spot, the good doctor handily “has relatives and old friends to visit there while he waits” for suitable candidates for dissection.

best closing sentence ever…

although Poland’s a long way to go in search of the G-spot,

I thought the G-spot was somewhere in the nether lands.

which actually has a lot going for it

Actor might be in a better position to comment on this than I am, but “love thy neighbor as thyself” is a good place to start.

Actor might be in a better position to comment on this than I am, but “love thy neighbor as thyself” is a good place to start.

Well, maybe there are a few quaint sensible ideas in there, but I’m definitely against the idea that we need a whole religion with all its racism, misogyny, dogma, and hate of shellfish to enforce the idea of “don’t be an asshole.”

The corpses make the g-spot story significantly less hot. But Im just speaking for myself…

Well, maybe there are a few quaint sensible ideas in there, but I’m definitely against the idea that we need a whole religion with all its racism, misogyny, dogma, and hate of shellfish to enforce the idea of “don’t be an asshole.”

Especially when it doesn’t work! They’re all assholes!!!!!
Poor non-asshole-behaving-enforcement.

Especially when it doesn’t work! They’re all assholes!!!!!

I don’t think they’re all assholes. The assholes are just the ones who get all the attention.

BWAH-HAHA: http://news.yahoo.com/colbert-super-pac-fundraises-ron-paul-173606794–abc-news-politics.html

How it works, see, is you read the Gospels and model your life after the protagonist in those stories. As written, he was a pretty good dude.

The corpses make the g-spot story significantly less hot. But Im just speaking for myself…

That’s just weird that dude thinks he found the G spot on a dead woman. What sort of response did he get when he found it? I don’t like it. I don’t like it AT ALL.

Also, I don’t think most chicks would approve of a dude using a scalpel and microscope to locate the spot. Presumptuous of me?

I don’t think they’re all assholes. The assholes are just the ones who get all the attention.

The galling part of that is that the assholery is founded on nothing. It doesn’t need to exist at all (though obviously assholes will find ways to be assholes in other spheres).

Also, I don’t think most chicks would approve of a dude using a scalpel and microscope to locate the spot. Presumptuous of me?

No, I think that’s reasonable. Again…just speaking for myself.

Take Endorse Liberty, a PAC dedicated to supporting Ron Paul’s candidacy

????? Cool name, bro.

Was “Super Freedom Speak” already taken?

The galling part of that is that the assholery is founded on nothing.

Vestigial remnants from the medieval church. All bullshit the clergy used to manipulate and impoverish Europe. It wasn’t supposed to have followed us here, but it seems like we’re setting the bar for Christianical fuckupedness.

Rejected Ron Paul Super PACs:

“GOLD!FREEDOM!LIBERTY!”

“Don’t Make Me Move In With My Son”

“Personal Responsibility (unless we’re talking about old newsletters)”

Vestigial remnants from the medieval church.

Newer religions can be just as harmful over nothing.

Newer religions can be just as harmful over nothing.

Well yeah, man. It’s a great racket. Why not jump on the bandwagon. You have legions of people willing to shit their pants and give you fat stacks of cheese at the mere mention of homosexuality. It didn’t take any of the religions long to create the idea of conservatism and use it to control dumbfucks.

“Don’t Make Me Move In With My Son”

Don’t let my so-uh-uhn go down on me…

Just because the church has a 2000 year history of selling out it’s mission of compassion and mercy in the quest for wealth and power, doesn’t mean they don’t have our best interests at heart. I mean, they covered up decades, maybe centuries of sexual abuse of children not out of a cynical defense of power or fear of financial and legal consequences, but out of love for their congregation. Can you imagine the disappointment and disillusionment they must be suffering now that it is impossible to ignore the depths of perfidy to which they would sink in defense of their privilege?

I thought everybody knew the G-spot is in eastern Java . No waves when I was there but I really liked the name of the town with the train station: Banyuwangi.

This is some entertaining perfidy I hadn’t heard of until recently.

now that it is impossible to ignore the depths of perfidy to which they would sink

With God, all things are possible, my son.

OK, this is weird. Turning on iCloud seems to give me back songs I thought I had dispensed with.

Substance, that link you posted mentioned the banker Roberto Calvi. He was a central player in the Banco Ambrosiano scandal, and also a member of the secret and illegal Propaganda Due Masonic Lodge. Which basically means this might be connected to the most popular and infamous conspiracy goldmine in modern Italian history.

If you read up on those documents,you begin to wonder if the main export of Italy in the late 70’s and early 80’s wasn’t skullduggery and financial impropriety.

Sorry, not documents, scandals.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roberto_Calvi
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Propaganda_Due
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banco_Ambrosiano

Anyway, its like something out of a cold war spy novel.

Listening now. Wow, this is good stuff.

I’m trying to go through all the until-now-ignored A items in the library, so:

Swanee |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Al Jolson
Red Scab |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Adam And The Ants
The Reason A Dog |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Aerosmith
Tired of Being Alone ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Al Green
Tourist ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Athlete
Apollo 9 ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Adam Ant
Hope There's Someone |||||||||||||| Antony and the Johnsons
Rolling In The Deep ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Adele
Looking In The Eyes Of Love | Alison Krauss & Union Station
Friend Or Foe |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Adam Ant
Mozambique ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Amon Düül II
Dead Girl |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Agents of Oblivion
War Tribes On Protest |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Ai
I And Love And You ||||||||||||||||||||||||| Avett Brothers
Chewing Gum Telegram ||||||||||||||||||||||||| Amon Düül II
balaclava |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Arctic Monkeys
Tango Suite: Andante |||||||||||||||||||||| Astor Piazzolla
What Happened Then ||||||||||||||||||||||| Apples In Stereo
Song for You |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Andy Stochansky
Set Fire To The Rain |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| Adele

Oh…I wish I had been in the mood to post when you posted your last list. I had like 3 or 4 of the songs in my liberry. I was so excited.

Jesus Christ, this is bizarre. It’s playing guilty pleasures I deleted YEARS ago. iCloud must be playing every purchase I’ve ever made. Somebody, hold me. I’m skeert.

Sorry, not documents, scandals.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roberto_Calvi
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Propaganda_Due
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banco_Ambrosiano

Anyway, its like something out of a cold war spy novel.

I’ve been on a roll lately of books about the “political-criminal nexus,” as one of my undergrad professors called it. Thanks for giving me a new topic I need to read up on.

New thread!

vacuumslayer said,

Listening now. Wow, this is good stuff.

They’re certainly no Nicklecreed.

So I shouldn’t get the Nickelback/Creed Christmas album for you this year?

Hope you’ve gotten to Operation Gladio.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Gladio

Hope you’ve gotten to Operation Gladio.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Gladio

The reason I love Archer is it can casually make Operation Gladio an integral part of a plot about a dead Italian in a zentai.

Hope you’ve gotten to Operation Gladio.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Gladio

“This article has multiple issues.
Its factual accuracy is disputed. Tagged since December 2007.
Its neutrality is disputed. Tagged since December 2007.”

I love teh Wackypedia.

vacuumslayer said,

April 25, 2012 at 23:53 (kill)

So I shouldn’t get the Nickelback/Creed Christmas album for you this year?

Oh, if only such an abomination existed! My gift giving plans for the holidays would be taken care of!

And in Googling to see if it did exist (alas!), I discovered this gem. Some poor soul went to a Creed show, where Nickelback was merely one of the opening acts, and guess who one of the other ones was….? The Tea Party!?!? I bet that’s the guy that trolled the 2008 Creed thread here! OMG like, it’s all connected man…woah…

If I ever write a book, it would be a spy thriller with Operation Gladio as a major plot point.

Hope you’ve gotten to Operation Gladio.

Not as such, no. I’ve read some stuff about CIA operations in France in the immediate postwar era, and a little more about their stuff in Italy, but nothing about that entire thing. Yet another one for the list.