Swing low sweet Herman Cain,

Comin’ for to pizza me today.

Uuuuuuummmm, I don’t think I can handle robin today.

No, no. Stay in the boat, order another pina colada, and trust the shorter.

yeah…robin shows up in church and the lights suddenly go out…coincidence? i think not, robin…god is trying to tell you something…

A better song for the teatards from Man of La Mancha would be “Aldonza”, in which a woman describes how her poor birth doomed her to a life of poverty and prostitution that is so miserable that Don Quixote’s attempts to elevate her hurt more than they help.

And, to paraphrase D-KW, I know the lyrics to dozens of songs from Broadway musicals in a totally heterosexual way.

All we are saying
Is give pizza chance!
~

After a few awkward moments, Cain did the most amazing thing, something perhaps unique in the annals of politics: he started singing (video) — and an apt song, “The Impossible Dream.” Perhaps inspired by the power of music, Cain even ended his appearance with a hymn about God’s infinite grace and forgiveness called “He Looked Beyond My Faults.”

One could hardly imagine Obama handling the situation so seamlessly and graciously. – R of B

If the President broke into a spiritual or gospel tune, Robin and gang would accuse him of being all niggery. But it is good to know that when Herman gets that 3am phone call he will answer with “Hello… is it me you;re looking for?”

So is Herman Cain the GOP savior of the week? I have trouble keeping track.

I will be your Godfather figure
Put your darling vote in mine
I will be teh one to tax you
Only Nein Nein Nein

The pastor had started delivering his sermon when suddenly most of the lights went out. The stage and the auditorium were very dimly lit.

Over a thousand people sat there in awkward silence. From what I could see of the stage, the minister and the staff who rushed to help looked worried and uncomfortable.

All of a sudden, an older black woman rose from the audience and strode confidently up to the stage. We all stared at her; no one had any idea what she was going to do.

When she reached center stage, she started singing, passionately, a cappella. She sang some sort of “Negro spiritual” (as they were once called), one that I had never heard before.

She had, with her powerful singing, called forth the power of the heavens, and as the church roof was opened via gigantic spectral fists the Archangel Michael flew down and with his mighty sword smote those Negroes for daring to vote Democrat.

OK, so the wingnuts are more comfortable with African-Americans in minstrel shows.

Like that’s a surprise.

OMG…from the comments:

jim says:
October 19, 2011 at 4:11 am
I’m such a bigot. Of the active candidates Mr. Cain is the only one I trust.
My dream ticket is Mr. Cain and Col. Allen West as V.P.
My super dream ticket would be Dr. Thomas Sowell with Dr. Walter Williams. These two gentlemen are way to smart for that.

Jim

Robin says:
October 19, 2011 at 9:04 am
I love Congressman West, too! What a powerhouse those two would be. And West would bring his military experience. A dream team! And would it obliterate the left’s trump card that we’re all racists!

i am hoping that this ‘jim’ is our jim who has totes pwned robin…

and ZOMG!

jeannieology says:
October 19, 2011 at 3:13 am
Robin! this is Jeannie – I love this piece today it is wonderful!!!!

robin and ruhnoomurka jeannie know each other?!?!? that’s gotta be some kind of crazy when those two bitchez chill together…and i love how even tho her name is clearly displayed, she is still like ‘it’s me jeannie!!!!!’ derp…

So is Herman Cain the GOP savior of the week?

At this rate, they’ll be back to Michele Bachmann by Thanksgiving.

If the President broke into a spiritual or gospel tune, Robin and gang would accuse him of being all niggery. But it is good to know that when Herman gets that 3am phone call he will answer with “Hello… is it me you;re looking for?”

for the fucking win, my friend…

She sang some sort of “Negro spiritual” (as they were once called), one that I had never heard before.

Always. Trust. The. Shorter.™

I did not. And now my IQ has dropped like a vorgshnagfarferflecht….

Say, about those “Negro spiritulals” like “You Should Be Dancin'” by the B. G.s (Black Gangstas, I bet!)

But it is good to know that when Herman gets that 3am phone call he will answer with “Hello… is it me you;re looking for?”

With our luck, he’s probably been drunk dialed.

But it is good to know that when Herman gets that 3am phone call he will answer with “Hello… is it me you;re looking for?”

STOP THAT! If I burst out laughing in my cubicle one more time I’ll get fired.

Don’t worry about your missing I.Q. points, because Doughy Pantload is here to save the day:

Naomi Wolf, Yawn

Thank goodness she takes herself so seriously, it makes up for the fact that no one else does.
~

Gee, it’s not stereotypical at all for a black man to suddenly burst out into song for no apparent reason…

I TOLD you all the one and only reason the baggers would go for Cain was so they could play the “WE’RE NOT RACIST–NEENER NEENER BOO BOO!!” card. It begins and ends with pissing off liberals always with the baggers. It’s practically their reason for living.

It’s for this very reason I think Cain has a chance.

It becomes readily obvious to this conservative that you liberals still aren’t able to counter the facts. How is our support of Herman Cain- a dynamic speaker and, quite frankly, brilliant public policy thinker- not proof that we are not the evil racists you left-wingers shriek about us being? It is to laugh that you, in your vapid quest to paint conservative America as some backwards, backwoods state of being, have yourselves adopted racism and bigotry as your arguments du jour. Tsk, tsk.

So is Herman Cain the GOP savior of the week?

I believe the term is “flavor” of the week. As in, “This week’s flavor (or “flava”) is chocolate pizza!”

Yes, all we are saaaying…
Is give pizza chants.

How is our support of Herman Cain- a dynamic speaker and, quite frankly, brilliant public policy thinker- not proof that we are not the evil racists you left-wingers shriek about us being?

Y’know, Jay, we’d almost buy that if it wasn’t for the past four years’ treatment of Obama as the house nigger by you folks.

I can almost hear Cain’s campaign song now:

Gonna jump down, turn around, pick a bale o cotton,
Gonna jump down, turn around, an’ vote fo’ Herman Cain

Tsk, tsk.

Ooooh… That sure stings. Please ‘splain us all about his brilliant policy positions. With citations.

Iffen you took it seriously, the fact that you think that a gospel singer would be able to channel Gawd into the White House, would be a worry. I guess it allows the Eager Diva to prove that Clinton was eevul since he played the saxophone which is jazz which is the debbil’s music

I call fake Jay Ambrose. There’s no call to burn moar fossil fuels.

How is our support of Herman Cain- a dynamic speaker and, quite frankly, brilliant public policy thinker- not proof that we are not the evil racists you left-wingers shriek about us being? I

Citation needed. Cain is a not very bright, not particularly articulate man whose 9-9-9 plan has been laughed at by even conservative economists. His entire foreign policy agenda consists of “listening” and “getting all the information.” That’s it. The man’s not qualified to be dog catcher, fgs.

BUT he didn’t want to “cause trouble” during the Civil Rights movement and hates all the right people (including a lot of other Black folks) so he’s ok with you bumpkins. Big freakin’ surprise. It’s gotta be incredibly handy to have tokens like Cain on your side.

How is our support of Herman Cain- a dynamic speaker and, quite frankly, brilliant public policy thinker- not proof that we are not the evil racists you left-wingers shriek about us being?

Your support of Herman Cain — an idiot who thinks that it’s a good idea to double the sales taxes poor people pay while reducing rich people’s taxes even further — just shows that you think you can prove you’re not racists by approving of one black man while still arguing that all the other black people are no good. If “think” is the word that fits whatever it is that goes on inside your racist little brains.

BUT he didn’t want to “cause trouble” “git all uppity” during the Civil Rights movement

Fixed for people who can’t hear dog whistles

Extremely relevant: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-DrSEyjBj1w

Extremely relevant: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-DrSEyjBj1w

IN A CHOIR ROBE?????

That’s blasphemy!

Oh but hey, not stereotypical at all, no sir. Totes not!

Gonna jump down, turn around, pick a bale o cotton,
Gonna jump down, turn around, an’ vote fo’ Herman Cain

awshit thats funny. Raffi, that inimitable children’s singer, does a version of this song and I’m wondering if that makes my 1yr old so the real racist.

Hit me
Going going gone
Now I proposed 999 a long time ago
Don’t you see how now they’re reactin’
They only come and they come when I poll well
I’ll get the right sound bite to sell well
I don’t care ’cause I stay paid anyway
I’ll teach ya like an ace that can’t be betrayed
I know I stumble with no use people
If your life is on the line, don’t care if you’re dead today
I’ma late coming man with the late coming plan you betcha
It’s a body bag in disguise y’all betcha
I call it body snatchers quick they come to fetch ya?
With a bankruptcy suit just to dissect ya
We are the kings ’cause we swing amputation
Lose your arms, your legs to us it’s the enterprise system
I can prove it to you just watch the juxtaposition
It all adds up to a funky situation
So get up get, get get down
999 is a joke in yo town
Get up, get, get, get down
Late 999 wears the late crown

brilliant public policy thinker-

Three or four nines and a bunch of electrocuted Mexicans does not brilliant policy make, amigo.

Herman Cain, 90 years ago

“When you was slaves, you’d sing like birds! How ’bout singin’ us one of your ni99er work songs?”

I am enjoying the thought of Jay feverishly googling………..

It becomes readily obvious to this conservative that

…you need an enema?

…you must be going?

…you have no sense of humour?

Come on! We can play this game until you fess up!

Anybody seen Mickey Kaus lately?

Ah, you liberals don’t disappoint. A conservative makes a stand for what they believe, and you predictably jump on like a pack of wild animals. The same sort of rhetoric you showed during the Bush Administration, and truly I tell you, your conduct during those years was disgraceful for this democracy. But I digress.

I call fake Jay Ambrose. There’s no call to burn moar fossil fuels.

If you want my feelings on these matters, you could always go here. The reality of the situation is, your precious Messiah has done far more harm than good to our economy through his vilification of this fine, fine standard-bearer of the American economy. Dare I say, is he anti-American? I think it shows.

Cain is a not very bright, not particularly articulate man

Again, I say: The real racists are liberals. As true as it’s been for a century. One side wants to promote, the other to tear down.

His entire foreign policy agenda consists of “listening” and “getting all the information.”

Yes, and what exactly is wrong with this? It’s certainly the way George W. Bush handled the Iraq War, still the greatest international alliance victory in history. This is something the American people should feel justifiably proud about- that there was a slow, methodical realization of a threat, and a removal of said threat. It’s you liberal whiners who made the Iraq War out to be some sort of “disaster,” for shame.

I’d rather my president listen and get information than plow into a country willy-nilly, like Barack Hussein is doing right now in Africa.

Your support of Herman Cain — an idiot who thinks that it’s a good idea to double the sales taxes poor people pay while reducing rich people’s taxes even further

I say let the makers make, and stop the takers from taking. Cain’s plan is a gem.

A conservative makes a stand for what they believe,

And in the process proves that he’s a worthless sack of shit.

Cain’s impromptu serenade demonstrates that he understands the power of God to heal and unite and empower every situation. For this reason alone, he has the potential, in my eyes, to illuminate the White House.

Because the White House, and our own houses, will only…can only…be brightened by the spirit of God. And the fact that Cain understands this says to me that he may be the man to return God there.

okay…i watched the damn video…herman was being all ‘ha, ha! the microphone don’t work…doobie doobie doo…dream, the impossible dream…’ and everybody laffed and had a happy. okay, yeah…herman can be entertaining when the power goes off…big whoop…

but wtf does ‘dream’ have to do with god? or ‘illuminating’ the white house? i think robin really needs to back away from the crack pipe, cuz i don’t see the connections…

or maybe she went to the josiah cantrell’s mom’s home school…

Exactly what I expected out of liberalism in 2012, N_B. If you want the grown-ups, we’re in the other room, watching our fine candidates discuss ideas.

Jay Ambrose is a poe. No human can be that obtuse.

I am enjoying the thought of Jay feverishly googling………..

Very impressive.

Exactly what I expected out of liberalism in 2012, N_B. If you want the grown-ups, we’re in the other room, watching our fine candidates discuss ideas.

Like which colour to paint the electrified fence?

It’s certainly the way George W. Bush handled the Iraq War, still the greatest international alliance victory in the history of Palau.

Fixed that for ya, Jayboy!

A conservative makes a stand for what they believe,

And in the process proves that he’s a worthless sack of shit.

He makes a wide stance, it’s true.

It’s certainly the way George W. Bush handled the Iraq War, still the greatest international alliance victory in history. This is something the American people should feel justifiably proud about- that there was a slow, methodical realization of a threat, and a removal of said threat

bush point-blank said in his ‘look back’ interview that he knew from the beginning that IRAQ WAS NOT THE PERPETRATOR NOR DID THEY HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH 9-11…

Barack Hussein is doing right now in Africa.

Oh, but you’re not racist, no sireee!

Exactly what I expected out of liberalism in 2012, N_B. If you want the grown-ups, we’re in the other room, watching our fine candidates discuss ideas.

Wouldn’t want to disappoint you, you fucking waste of space. You think you’re a grown up and yet your entire part consists of morons, liars, bigots, and greedheads. Please, make Cain your candidate: his idiocy on economics, social policy, and foreign policy will give us both houses of congress and you’ll be left wondering why the grown-ups are laughing at you.

But I digress.

And neglect to offer citations of “brilliance” other than you squeaking that he is, and shut up, that’s why… We’re waiting.

I stand corrected! Jay clearly has no intention of showing any evidence that Cain has anything on the ball. He simply ASSERTS. I guess it worked for him in his home-schooling.

Did we link to this fine Herman Cain performance yet?

He simply ASSERTS

You know what happens when you assert, right?

You ass hurts.

Marion, I dare say the true call would be for liberals to defend Obama as some sort of great thinker. From the start, when he thought there were 57 states, to his overuse of teleprompters, to his diastrous policies and the snide way he deals with people, it was evident to people like me that he is no thinker. Why don’t you defend that? As for Cain, if you are unable to see the brains behind his brawn during debates, then you’re biased. Bottom line.

I officially call Poe.

As for Cain, if you are unable to see the brains behind his brawn

The guy’s a girlie-man so how much brains could his scrawny little ass be holding?

Exactly what I expected out of liberalism in 2012, N_B. If you want the grown-ups, we’re in the other room, watching fapping to our fine candidates lady michele discussing ideas more ways to become ignorant racists.

I officially call Poe.

The letter is hidden IN THE ENVELOPE!

when Herman gets that 3am phone call he will answer with “Hello… is it me you;re looking for?”

Died.

I call fake Jay Ambrose. There’s no call to burn moar fossil fuels.

Implicit. Moar pizza delivery.

the greatest international alliance victory in history

This is just about enough to make me call shenanegans. Not even the Doughy Pantload could say that with a straight face…

Moar pizza delivery.

You think Cain’s slogan will be “A chicken in every bukkit, and a pizza in every garage”?

You liberals sure have a jolly time picking nits about over-specific things. It’s a joke! Bottom line: Cain says we should have a fence. It should be near impossible to go through. Why wouldn’t this make sense to anyone? Yet, you liberals keep huffing puffing at minutia. I dare say this is the only method you think will work in 2012. Have your Barack Hussein character assassinate his way to victory by focusing on irrelevancies.

Well, the American people may have been fooled in 2008, ho ho, but 2012 will be a different story indeed.

Def fake Ambrose. Troll-d00d, Jay Ambrose’s smug superior schtick don’t work so well when you have him responding to anything other than his own fevered imaginations. A good fake Jay Ambrose would have declared victory and hied off to Parts Unknown after teh first comment. Which would have been something about how Global Warming is fake.

This is just about enough to make me call shenanegans.

Is Saddam gone? Yes. Were only a few people harmed? Yes. Thus, victory, no matter what your pal Chirac might say.

One could hardly imagine Obama handling the situation so seamlessly and graciously.

Couldn’t one? I can imagine him doing quite well, just speaking up a bit and maybe looking at his notes more often. I’d guess she doesn’t have any imagination at all if she can’t imagine such a scenario easily.

When his teleprompter fails, Obama is usually rendered speechless or tongue-tied. My guess is that Obama also becomes irritated at the people running the show.

No, she does indeed have quite the fevered imagination. My bad.

As for Cain, if you are unable to see the brains behind his brawn…

Is this another way of saying he’s a meathead?

Oh, and Jay, honey, I have no intention of “defending” President Obama to you. You can demand that I do that when I swan over to your blog and TSK, TSK you about shit. Mkay?

Is Saddam gone? Yes.

Does the Pope shit in the woods? Yes.

Is a bear Catholic? Yes.

Are you a candy-ass? Yes.

See? Really simple!

Oh fuck you DK, you can’t steal “fevered imagination” WHILE I’m typing it in. Bastard.

His entire foreign policy agenda consists of “listening” and “getting all the information.”

Yes, and what exactly is wrong with this? It’s certainly the way George W. Bush handled the Iraq War, still the greatest international alliance victory in history. This is something the American people should feel justifiably proud about- that there was a slow, methodical realization of a threat, and a removal of said threat. It’s you liberal whiners who made the Iraq War out to be some sort of “disaster,” for shame.

This has to be fake…

Dubya “listened”? “…slow, methodical realization of a threat”? WTF? On what planet did that happen? The Bush administration slowly and methodically completely made up a blatantly fake justification to bomb the shit out of Iraq, and completely ignored or actively scoffed at all the sane people that told them their justifications were bogus. Iraq was absolutely no threat to us whatsoever.

And to be sure you see me through your proper “uncivil liberal” glasses: Fuck you, you wankstain on the couch of life.

No, she does indeed have quite the fevered imagination. My bad.

You knew it was just a matter of time when the truck was stolen that they’d trot this old saw out.

NEWSFLASH, TEABAGGERS: NO POLITICIAN RELIES ON HIS MEMORY WHEN GIVING A SPEECH!

In case you missed it, those little glass panels next to the podium ARE TELEPROMPTERS!

Were only a few people harmed?

That’s just unspeakable, you fucker, unless of course you only are counting Americans killed and maimed, in which case it’s merely appalling. You’re a disgrace to the human race.

Were only a few people harmed? Yes.

Ignorance must be bliss.

How serious and significant is the “NEIN! NEIN! NEIN!” plan?

EA is re-releasing SimCity.

For $9.99

Bastard.

Not to worry, if teh oncoming Wingularity has a silver lining it’s that there’ll be fevered imaginations for everyone!

SOJELLULASM!

the greatest international alliance victory in history

This is just about enough to make me call shenanegans. Not even the Doughy Pantload could say that with a straight face…

Yeah that was over the top, but it made me laugh so I guess that is effective trolling on a humor blog.

Ignorance must be bliss.

In fairness to Jay, he doesn’t think of our Iraqi allies as people.

More like brown-skinned targets.

And yet I see nothing about the horrors of the Saddam regime here. It’s almost like your hatred of Bush gets in the way of, well, everything.

Including how solid this Republican field is. Including Cain.

And yet I see nothing about the horrors of the Saddam regime here.

Really? You expect us to twist our panties over something that Clinton fixed 20 years ago?

How…nostalgic…of you, reminding us of the Greatest. President. Ever!

And yet I see nothing about the horrors of the Saddam regime here.

The picture of Rumsfeld shaking Saddam’s hand was pretty grainy, but I wouldn’t call it “horrible.”

Jay, you DO realize that “Cain” is not John MCCain, right?

Including how solid this Republican field is. Including Cain.

Hee heee heee. In fake Ambrose’s defense, d00d is pretty funneh.

This cartoon by the always-fantastic Michael Ramirez shows my thoughts on Cain well enough. You liberals can discount those highlights all you want. I dare say the American people can and will decide otherwise. And you will be left to your own racist boogeymen, most likely living not under your beds, but staring back at you in the mirror.

Well, the Republican field is extremely solid. Particularly between the ears.

Dragon-King Wangchuck, do you have anything to add other than your own self-amusement? Not that liberals are doing much more these days, unless you think the Occupy Wall Street But Apparently Not Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac protests are something more than simple vanity.

Whoa–he brought cartoons! FakeJay has planned this attack strategy well.

Yes. Thus, victory, no matter what your pal Chirac might say.

Slam on the French along with a QED posted in spite of being wrong as hell, all in once sentence. You’re pretty good, FakeJay.

Cain is more than just a pizza magnate you know. He also ran Burger King, and was on the board of Whirlpool. And you can’t even eat white goods.

do you have anything to add other than your own self-amusement?

I’m gonna SELF AMUSE ALL OVER YO FACE! And you will like it, despite your fake objections.

And you will be left to your own racist boogeymen, most likely living not under your beds, but staring back at you in the mirror.

You ALMOST got me to defect with this proclamation. Almost.

I know the fantasy world I live in is reality and there’s nothing you can do to change it! I’m rubber, you’re glue!

Dragon-King Wangchuck, do you have anything to add other than your own self-amusement?

Dude, snark blog, hulllo!

This cartoon by the always-fantastic Michael Ramirez shows my thoughts on Cain well enough.

Um, I think you missed the joke there, Jayboy.

NOTE: Re-read the caption…

Here’s some of Cain’s foreign policy brilliance on display for the troll (is this a new Dennis disguise?) to take a look at, after he’s done gazing at his pretty cartoon.

Wait, fakeJay isn’t Dennis, it’s too lucid in it’s ridiculousness.

Hmm… Fenwick hasn’t been around… Fenwick, is this a new schtick?

That last “Jay Ambrose,” wasn’t me. Obviously. It would appear as if I cannot trust this liberal crowd to debate my points on their own merits, which while not surprising, certainly continues to be disheartening. And not just for me as a conservative thinker, but me as an American, someone who has to wade through stagnant miasma pools of liberal insults before ever able to actually finish out an argument. Americans have the choice of that…or they could look at the fine policy discussions emanating from the Republican debates, and realize that the “choice” isn’t really a choice at all.

And you will be left to your own racist boogeymen, most likely living not under your beds, but staring back at you in the mirror.

I saw that movie! It starred Keifer Sutherland and the entire Republican party!

I know the fantasy world I live in is reality and there’s nothing you can do to change it! I’m rubber, you’re glue!

See, now THIS is the Jay Ambrose we all know and love.

And not just for me as a conservative thinker

Thinker….you keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Dragon-King Wangchuck, do you have anything to add other than your own self-amusement?

Uh,,, I can also amuse your mother.

Oh, and this, in a just world, would be the end of the discussion of Cain’s 999 “plan.”

That’s just unspeakable, you fucker, unless of course you only are counting Americans killed and maimed, in which case it’s merely appalling. You’re a disgrace to the human race.

This is the part that had me calling Poe. I mean, really? Hundreds of thousands and Iraqis, tens of thousands of Americans killed and wounded. This means nothing to Jay? That’s beyond disgusting.

Cain is more than just a pizza magnate you know.

Godfather’s had 911 locations when cain took over. He ran it down to four hundred.

After he left, it grew to over 600.

By “magnate” you meant the kind that repels, right?

How serious and significant is the “NEIN! NEIN! NEIN!” plan?

For $9.99,

That is awesome.

When the pod people of Gargalon VII come down and use their Teleprompter Mind-Control rays to turn all birth certificates into gold bullion and the stock market tanks, you’ll all see! Barack NObama will show his true colors and all his Occupy Toadies will pull out their Fannie Mac Machineguns! Then the trillions of downtrodden, ignored REAL AMERICANS will rise up against the NObama/Gargalaon menace and overthrow the EVIL HITLER GOVERNMENT that is preventing all job creation!

JUST YOU WAIT LIBS!

Uh,,, I can also amuse your mother.

LOL

And yet I see nothing about the horrors of the Saddam regime here. It’s almost like your hatred of Bush gets in the way of, well, everything.

who brought up bush? bueller?…bueller?…anyone?…oh, that’s right it was jay!

and also, too? what do the horrors of saddam’s regime have to do with why dubya decided to drop a shitton of bombs on iraq? i would say we are all unequivocably glad to a sadly that the bastard is rotting in hell right now…and right now, i’m going to stand up for what i believe…dubya had a boner to kill saddam in a futile effort to make daddy proud…

Oh, and this, in a just world, would be the end of the discussion of Cain’s 999 “plan.”

Actually, this is

Yes, it’s accurate. I ran the numbers (and even re-ran the graph to be sure)

Dragon-King Wangchuck, for the amusement of everyone here would you Occupy my mom’s Fannie on Wall Street?

“It would appear as if I cannot trust this liberal crowd to debate my points on their own merits”

At the very beginning, you were challenged to cite evidence of Cain’s brilliance. You have not. Hint: a “debate” is not a series of assertions.

JUST YOU WAIT LIBS!

Needs moar bookmarking.

This is just about enough to make me call shenanegans. Not even the Doughy Pantload could say that with a straight face…

I’m gonna blame fish right now.
~

a “debate” is not a series of assertions.

yes it is!

You have not. Hint: a “debate” is not a series of assertions.

I came here for an argument!

Oh, this is abuse!

Dragon-King Wangchuck, for the amusement of everyone here would you Occupy my mom’s Fannie on Wall Street?

Sure thing. Man, is teh General ASS-embly gonna be surprised.

I came here for an argument!

A-hem

I suspect Jay put in his monocle, put on his top hat, clicked his heel and with glov’d fist curled around his cane held high over his head, has shouted “Good day, sirs! I said, GOOD DAY!”

Then spun around and walked right into the doorjamb

At the very beginning, you were challenged to cite evidence of Cain’s brilliance. You have not.

Cain realizes that this nation is in deep trouble, partly because of an overwhelming debt, but also because of a steady march toward dignity-denying, freedom-cheating, ambitions making serfs of us all, and a wimpy, blame-us foreign policy. If you don’t think that’s brilliant, at least compared to the continuing miasma of self-loving and America-loathing from this president, then I’m afraid you are without hope.

Fake Jay is fake.

*plugs his ears*
LALALALALALA CAN’T HEAR YOU
TELEPROMPTER
IRAQ WAR
BIRTH CERTIFICATE
VACATIONS
RACISM
EVERYTHING BAD ABOUT BUSH IS THE SAME WITH OBAMA
(dammit this always works on Fox)

Godfather’s had 911 locations when cain took over. He ran it down to four hundred.

In Cain’s “defense,” this is what he was intended to do. He was never any kind of “magnate.” He was a cubicle rat at Pillsbury, back when they were inexplicably in the fast-food restaurant business. He simply sucked enough corporate cock to get himself into a position to do the management-by-machete thing at Godfather’s, which is the only thing big corporations know how to do when they take over a money-losing business.

He then went on to head the National Restaurant Assn., a trade group for the fast food industry. Its mission is simple: Defending its members’ rights to market sugary, fatty crap to children while fucking over its employees in any and every way possible.

The guy is a corporate drone, just like Mittens, only not as successful (which is why he can’t self-fund his mayfly campaign).

And then, the president has to be the president and make a judgement call. I can make that call if I had to.”

i think, and correct me if i’m wrong, that at the end of the day, what herman cain is saying, is, that being said, ‘I CAN BE THE DECIDERER!!!!’

Cain realizes that this nation is in deep trouble, partly because of an overwhelming debt, but also because of a steady march toward dignity-denying, freedom-cheating, ambitions making serfs of us all

Sooooooooooooooooo, he blames Bush, too?

Jay, you understand that simply saying something doesn’t make it so, don’t you? You have to facts and figures to back up your assertions.

In Cain’s “defense,” this is what he was intended to do.

Right, which takes all the genius of a chimp and a dart board.

It would appear as if I cannot trust this liberal crowd to debate my points on their own merits

One cannot debate something lacking in merit.

I still claim that fakery is afoot*!

(*Vmrs.rexryanR)

Vacuumslayer, if you are unable to see the great work Cain has done as a businessman, and if you are unable to hear his solid words during Republican debates, then the fault lies in your own laziness. I won’t do the legwork for you, as I am very busy.

Those who protest at OWS: They are the beautiful. I remain the dutiful.

I think Jay is DougJ from Balloon Juice trolling us well.

,,,they could look at the fine policy discussions emanating from the Republican debates,,,

BWaAAHAHHhahaHAHa. +1 LOL d00d. That’s hilarious. Okay, for that you get your first question answered:
How is our support of Herman Cain- a dynamic speaker and, quite frankly, brilliant public policy thinker- not proof that we are not the evil racists you left-wingers shriek about us being?

d00dm teh RoB link that is teh main post? There’s black folks in her post – they are Herman Cain, “negro spiritual” singing Southern Gospel choir members and slaves.

I still claim that fakery is afoot*!

“I’ve got pussyfoot.”

“You sure do, lady.” [/Carlin]

You expect me to articulate what makes R-legs good D-legs bad? Why can’t you just accept my blind ideology as fact? Stupid libs.

Shorter Jay Ambrose:

CANNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZ

(*Vmrs.rexryanR)

Are we ready for some FOOTBALL!

Cain realizes that this nation is in deep trouble, partly because of an overwhelming debt, but also because of a steady march toward dignity-denying, freedom-cheating, ambitions making serfs of us all, and a wimpy, blame-us foreign policy. If you don’t think that’s brilliant, at least compared to the continuing miasma of self-loving and America-loathing from this president, then I’m afraid you are without hope.

1) It’s not brilliance to recognize that this nation is in deep trouble.

2) The debt almost entirely comprised of the cost of wars that you morons all started and kept going. Obama has kept those going, so why all the hate?

3) Steady march toward…..blah blah blah. This is where you go when you don’t know what to say and you’re tired of getting your ass handed to you on the merits of your lies and false assertions. We don’t loathe America, we loathe people like you who are trying to kill America with plutocracy.

I won’t do the legwork for you, as I am very busy.

But not too busy to post here?

if you are unable to hear his solid words during Republican debates

They make a really nice clunk when they fall like lead balloons.

I won’t do the legwork for you, as I am very busy.

But not too busy to post here?

actually, i think jay is just more of a boobz man

But not too busy to post here?

He said “legwork,” vs. That’s women’s work for Republicans.

Now go sit on his lap and help him adjust his tie. Maybe he’ll buy you something!

Jay, since you are channeling Cain, please amuse us some more by telling us how the free market will decide how nuclear waste should be disposed, as was agreed to by all the clowns on the stage last night.

It’s obvious that liberals would rather take the easy way out with Cain- refuse to learn his history, refuse to listen to his words, analyze his policy ideas only through strawmen and spin, refuse to read the published words of Cain supporters like me- than address him head on, and I dare say this is not any different than the way it was under the last president. I can’t even start to argue with you on Cain as the beginning for you is the end- you hate the man, truly hate him, and that is that in your world view. Shame.

It’s obvious that liberals would rather take the easy way out with Cain- refuse to learn his history, refuse to listen to his words, analyze his policy ideas only through strawmen and spin, refuse to read the published words of Cain supporters like me- than address him head on, and I dare say this is not any different than the way it was under the last president. I can’t even start to argue with you on Cain as the beginning for you is the end- you hate the man, truly hate him, and that is that in your world view. Shame.

ya know, if you substitute obama for cain, you just may have something!

“you hate the man, truly hate him”

Project much?

Also, I should point out that I was born without the parts of the brain required to illustrate the reasons I support things, to conduct actual debate, or to differentiate between hatred and ridicule.

In Cain’s “defense,” this is what he was intended to do. He was never any kind of “magnate.” He was a cubicle rat at Pillsbury, back when they were inexplicably in the fast-food restaurant business. He simply sucked enough corporate cock to get himself into a position to do the management-by-machete thing at Godfather’s, which is the only thing big corporations know how to do when they take over a money-losing business.

Hmmm yet ANOTHER corporate hack whose experience is riding the businesses down into the dirt. We never seem to get anyone that built something, do we? Always with the guys who made “tough decisions™!” Just the same psychos like Carly and Herman…thinking that slashing and burning a business and treating people like livestock is a good model for the government of 300 million human beings.

Actually, this is

Now that was a roller-coaster.

It’s obvious that liberals would rather take the easy way out with Cain

Point and laugh at an obvious joke.

See? We’re communicating finally!

Yes, and what exactly is wrong with this? It’s certainly the way George W. Bush handled the Iraq War, still the greatest international alliance victory in history. This is something the American people should feel justifiably proud about- that there was a slow, methodical realization of a threat, and a removal of said threat. It’s you liberal whiners who made the Iraq War out to be some sort of “disaster,” for shame.

Obvious troll is obvious.

ya know, if you substitute obama for cain, you just may have something can relive the 2008 election through conservative eyes!

Better, no?

the published words of Cain supporters like me

Where are you published? Are you like Jeremiah Jeddediah Imonfire Cantrall up top here? Self-published blog substituting for actual knowledge and editing?

It’s obvious that liberals would rather take the easy way out with Cain- refuse to learn his history, refuse to listen to his words, analyze his policy ideas only through strawmen and spin

Whaaaa? You came to OUR snark blog and laid down this assertion that Cain has got it all going on. Then you advise us to “look it up” because you don’t have time or some shit (although I noticed you have time to continue posting). Now you want to snivel and whine that we’re analyzing policy through logical fallacies? If that were true, you should have no problem refuting our claims, yes? So make with the links/evidence, chump.

t’s obvious that liberals would rather take the easy way out with Cain- refuse to learn his history, refuse to listen to his words,

No, I did listen to his words. Right up until he said “productiuon drives the economy.” I saw no point in listening further.

Now you want to snivel and whine that we’re analyzing policy through logical fallacies?

In fairness to us, you really want to wade through that swamp?

It’s obvious that liberals would rather take the easy way out with Cain- refuse to learn his history, refuse to listen to his words

Interestingy, JA, commenters here have actually ripped apart his history and his words, which you refuse to acknowledge. It does remind one of a recent visitor here….

what we would rather do, by far, is mock transparent trolls and make them cry. You want debate, go to Kos.

We never seem to get anyone that built something, do we? Always with the guys who made “tough decisions™!”

Well, to be fair, people who build things are busy tending them. But pink-slipping a few hundred people doesn’t take much time or effort, which is why the Tough Decision™ makers have enough time to give the rest of us the benefit of their wisdom.

In fairness to us, you really want to wade through that swamp?

How many of these wingnut morons has accepted this challenge and even tried? This one brought a cartoon that destroyed his own argument!

Well, to be fair, people who build things are busy tending them.

Except Donald Trump.

Maybe that was a bad example…

treating people like livestock is a good model for the government of 300 million human beings.

it is if you want to make Soylent Green!

Are we ready for some FOOTBALL!

YES I AM!

Sadly, I’m a Chiefs fan, so I don’t get to see actual football — just some doodz trying in vain to throw and/or run with a football one direction, while letting other teams throw and/or run with a football at will in the other.

Now I haz a sad …

**goes and re-read Jay’s post**

… and now I haz a laffing!

Oh, and given that us Sadlies have posted more of Cain’s policy platform and actual words than Jay has, can someone explain to me why Jay keeps claiming that none of us are paying attention to Cain’t platform and actual words?

Other than his clinical stupidity. ‘Cuase that’s a given.

Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing. Heh. Indeed. Read the whole thing.

I, for one, welcome back our malfunctioning robot overlord.

Well, to be fair, people who build things are busy tending them. But pink-slipping a few hundred people doesn’t take much time or effort, which is why the Tough Decision™ makers have enough time to give the rest of us the benefit of their wisdom.

Boy, do they…

I know that the actual successful entrepreneurs generally don’t want a fucking thing to do with politics. I’m just becoming quite irritated with seeing “Laid off 25,000 workers and streamlined productivity with our new Malaysia facility” on a resume and the guy still having a chance to win office in the USA. That’s somebody we should demand go and run the fucking sweatshops they set up in far away lands. Drink the water they pollute there, breathe the air, live among the people they pay sub-subsistence wages to…

Oh, I’m on my soapbox again, aren’t I?

The “Cain’t” was a typo, but just might be a keeper …

Sadly, I’m a Chiefs fan, so I don’t get to see actual football — just some doodz trying in vain to throw and/or run with a football one direction, while letting other teams throw and/or run with a football at will in the other.

I feel your pain. Seahawks fan, brother. There’s a light in the tunnel lately. Those of us who have been fans for a while know that’s a freight train.

Who oiled the robot? It’s been a while since it clanked through…

I really would like to hear the free-market argument for nuclear waste disposal. Anybody want to indulge me?

it is if you want to make Soylent Green!

Silly actor! That’s what the electrified fence is for!

But it’ll be called TexMexoylent Brown.

Anybody want to indulge me?

Two birds with one stone. Forget alligators, we got something bettar to fill teh border moat with.

But it’ll be called TexMexoylent Brown.

mmmmm, sizzling Fajitas!

Those of us who have been fans for a while know that’s a freight train.

Yeah, but at least your team won a playoff game in the past decade — hell, y’all won one just last year!

Mine hasn’t won in the postseason since 1993. When Joe Montana was the QB. And Marcus Allen the RB.

Think ’bout that for a second.

When combined with the Royals, it’s been … **carries the one** … a combined 44 years of misery here in KC.

Welcome to my sports life. Thanks for playing!

I really would like to hear the free-market argument for nuclear waste disposal.

Sure. I’ll give this a shot.

Well, you see, since nukes take millions of years to decay, we’d always have a fresh supply of them around, so by paying someone to dump them, one of our intrepid entrepreneurs would figure out something to do with it.

After all, anything that’s free is good for you, right?

I really would like to hear the free-market argument for nuclear waste disposal.

We’re ALWAYS getting offers to sell the stuff. Apparently some people want radioactive waste. Let’s just sell it to the highest bidder! Then it becomes their problem.

Here’s some of Cain’s foreign policy brilliance on display for the troll

Like a clown-car pile-up, that is sad and hilarious at the same time. Cain mistakes a debate ‘question’ for a *real* hypothetical-situation question and tries to give it a *serious deliberative* answer… the other candidates recognise it for what it is, an invitation to shout out slogans about their ideological purity and how inflexibly they would ignore real-world information in that hypothetical situation.
Cain back-tracks.

The fact is Jay Ambrose has perfectly illustrated Herman Cain’s political strategy. Deal with it libtards!

Welcome to my sports life. Thanks for playing!

I’m a lifelong Mets, Jets, Rangers, Knicks fan.

In case you’re keeping score, that’s exactly one world championship in the past twenty years, one World Series appearance…and precious little else. In eighty team-years (20 x 4)

Across FOUR teams.

Yeah, but at least your team won a playoff game in the past decade — hell, y’all won one just last year!

Your team won their division last year…Jamal Charles is out for the season–things aren’t nearly as horrible as they are in Miami. Just hang in there with the Cheifs.

The Royals, though. Ooof. Well, You can always look across the cellar at the Mariners and down at the Astros, yeah?

Jets,

Switch to the Giants. At least their coach is a quiet asshole. Ryan is an uber DOUCHE.

Also, Actor, WAHHHHH

How about ZERO championships EVER?

You’ll always have Namath.

And now we have Gary Ruppert! Any second now I expect an appearance from da cool coach.

Switch to the Giants.

NEVER! I’ll never turn to the dark side! I’m a Jet-i, like my father before me!

The fact is Jay Ambrose has perfectly illustrated Herman Cain’s political strategy. Deal with it libtards!

You’re right, Gary, he did perfectly illustrate it. Consider it dealt with!

You’ll always have Namath.

I’d pick him over Sanchez, cane and all.

Wev. Teh LEAFS SUCK MLB team plays in teh same division as teh Yankees and Red Sox. And teh Raptors?!

Plus, teh Leafs*. I mean sure you got some bad teams, but you can at least hold out hope for teh future. SRSLY, our best hope for any playoff appearances is our fricking soccer team.

*I am aware of their current record. I believe they started last season at 8-1-1.

How about ZERO championships EVER?

Oh come on now! You guys must have won a championship in…..errrrr…hog calling! I betcha!

Any second now I expect an appearance from da cool coach.

Shalom-a-doodily, gentlemen.

The fact is Jay Ambrose has perfectly illustrated Herman Cain’s political strategy.

yes. Yes he has.

summed up thusly: “Derp.”

I’m a Cubs fan.

In terms of sheer misery, that trumps any other team, anywhere, anytime.

Silly actor! That’s what the electrified fence is for!

mark d…thank you so much for giving me teh opportunity to post this! i missed my chance yesterday and thought all was lost…

ooops, sorry to step on your toes tsam. Don’t slit my throat, bro!

Me team got one AFC championship, the year I saw The Music CIty Miracle, in personable.
.

I’m a Cubs fan.

Oh man. I didn’t know…

In case you’re keeping score, that’s exactly one world championship in the past twenty years, one World Series appearance…and precious little else. In eighty team-years (20 x 4)

Across FOUR teams.

Kind of a slow learner, ain’t ya?

CUBS WIN!! CUBS WIN111!!1!!

Welcome to my sports life. Thanks for playing!

d’oh…this just in! leslie frazier’s house has been egged…considering none of the dozen eggs actually HIT frazier’s house, the suspect is donavan mcnabb…

Welcome to my sports life.

Washington fan here.

That’s ‘Skins, Wizards and (now) Nats.

*drops mic* Argument over.

(And none of that “Just switch to the Baltimore teams” garbage).

Don’t slit my throat, bro!

I would never attack a zombie with a knife. Don’t like my chances.

teh opportunity to post this!

Yes!
~

Kind of a slow learner, ain’t ya?

And that’s a zombie calling me slow.

That’s ‘Skins, Wizards and (now) Nats.

*drops mic* Argument over.

*AHEM*

Bullets. Capitols.

*drops mic* Argument over. *begins singing ‘dream the impossible dream’ or perhaps some ‘negro spiritual’*

*it’s what robin would do…

And that’s a zombie calling me slow.

Ever since “28 Days Later” and “Dawn of the Dead (remake)” they’ve become sprinters.

But it’ll be called TexMexoylent Brown Fritos.

How is our support of Herman Cain- a dynamic speaker and, quite frankly, brilliant public policy thinker- not proof that we are not the evil racists you left-wingers shriek about us being?

Good question.

Could it be because Herman Cain himself demonstrates vicious prejudice towards Hispanic immigrants (MEGALULZ!!! Fry them at the border! You libs just got no sense of humor), Muslim Americans (they’re taking orders from the Pope trying to subvert America, man!) and gays (not only the marriage stuff, he actually wants to reinact DADT)? I mean, were the antisemites and anti-black racists from the 1930s any less prejudiced just because some of them listened to an Irish Catholic radio-evangelist?

Or is it just the fact that you’re the only party where a black man still feels the need to equivocate, backtrack and apologize because he took offense at the word “nigger?”

No, no prejudice in the Republican Party AT ALL, clearly.

Ever since “28 Days Later” and “Dawn of the Dead (remake)” they’ve become sprinters.

One of the biggest debate among zombieists is “fast v. slow”

The consensus seems to be moving towards how they were formed. If they become infected and quickly turn into zombies, that’s a fast zombie. If they actually have to die first of something else then become reanimated, that’s a shambler.

*AHEM*

Bullets. Capitols.

Oh how could I forget the Caps? A key component to our great mediocre stew!

And Monty Burns (b4 he died) changed the Bullets to the Wizards long ago (*sigh*). They’ve never been the same.

The curse of Danny Snyder haunts we DC fans.
~

Oh come on now! You guys must have won a championship in…..errrrr…hog calling! I betcha!

WNBA, last year…

woohoo.

Man, how bored are you Sadlynaughts today, anyway? It’s like watching a bunch of cats bat around the dismembered remains of a mouse.

why doesn’t south dakota have a professional football team?

Not as bored as you, apparently, nonny mouse.
~

The consensus seems to be moving towards how they were formed. If they become infected and quickly turn into zombies, that’s a fast zombie. If they actually have to die first of something else then become reanimated, that’s a shambler.

Romero argues that moving to fast would rip them apart…of course he never explains why even as corpses they remain as strong as a living human being (anyone here ever tried to just rip a chunk of flesh off?)

I just chalk it up to “whatver’s cool for the story.” Just stay consistent.

It’s like watching a bunch of cats bat around the dismembered remains of a mouse.

YOU GOT A MOUSE?

That last “Jay Ambrose,” wasn’t me. Obviously.

I’M Jay Ambrose!

It’s like watching a bunch of cats bat around the dismembered remains of a mouse.

Herman Cain’s latest hit!

o/~ I will dismember yooooooooooooooooooou o/~

You’ll always have Namath.

Dear fucking lord … I’m trying to think of a more overrated QB in NFL history. Dude got famous for one prediction and wearing pantyhose. Other than that, he was devastatingly average, at best.

Pryme — I was alive the last time your team won a Super Bowl (a few of them, in fact!). Mine won theirs the year before I was born and, at this rate, will do so again the year after I die. Especially with the cheapest owner in the NFL (which is saying a lot given the Brown family still runs the Bengals), the most overrated GM in history, and a coach who needs to be nutpunched.

Chicago fans can blow me — you live in a city in which your NFL team won something like 10 division titles in 11 years, plus a Super Bowl, and your basketball team owned the NBA finals during the ’90s.

The only ones who can compare in misery — especially when one factors in the Royals — are Seattle fans (sorry, tsam!), LEAF SUCK, and anyone from Cleveland.

The rest of you are poseurs.

(Oh my … how fucking sad is it that we’re trying to compete to see who has the shittiest teams?!)

Is nonny calling Jay a mouse-dick?

The curse of Danny Snyder haunts we DC fans.

I always said that he and Monty Burns owned the wrong sport franchises. If big spender Snyder ran the Wizards, they would have been the Mavericks of the East.

Vacuumslayer, if you are unable to see the great work Cain has done as a businessman, and if you are unable to hear his solid words during Republican debates, then the fault lies in your own laziness. I won’t do the legwork for you, as I am very busy.

LAWL.

One of the more high-larious moments in trolling comes when the troll, having just spawned a dozen posts or so, suddenly proclaims he/she’s “too busy” to actually post anything worthwhile. “It’s work, how I hate it! I’d much rather troll!”

Professional mouse batting is a fucking joke, nowadays.

Dude got famous for one prediction and wearing pantyhose.

And for being the first QB to throw for over 4,000 yards in a season.

…back when that meant something.

And he probably single-handed invented the West Coast offense, even tho he did it twenty years before it was named.

The only ones who can compare in misery

I am just sitting here quietly in the land of the Badgers, the Brewers, and the Packers, watching you all flagellate yourselves.

Of course, no need to talk about the Bucks.

Viking, Twin and Wild fan here – this has been a true year of suckitude but I am anxious to see what Ponder can do. If he can pull off a miracle and beat the Pack he will be instant royalty in MN. I don’t expect it, I just want to see good play from him.

At least the Lynx and the UMD Bulldogs (Yea Dogs!) won this year, so there’s that at least.

Professional mouse batting is a fucking joke, nowadays.

Ever since the leage banned the spit-mouse.

I am just sitting here quietly in the land of the Badgers, the Brewers, and the Packers

I blame the Packers for Favre’s sexting problem.

If only there were hot wimmin on Green Bay, he might not have been overwhelmed by our supermodels.

POOPY!!!!

(Oh my … how fucking sad is it that we’re trying to compete to see who has the shittiest teams?!)

I was talking sport cities as a whole, but if you just wanna count football: we won shit in the 80’s. Ya-fucking-hoo.

And believe me: having an owner that’ll sign an ex-dogcatcher to QB for several million cause “he’s got a good feeling about this kid” ain’t all wine and roses. To me, it’s just another lost draft.

I know that the actual successful entrepreneurs generally don’t want a fucking thing to do with politics.

I think that’s true of society in general. Most of the good people don’t like the bullshit that comes with politics, so they stay out of it. The power-hungry psychos are drawn to the bullshit, so they end up rising to the top.

S. cerevisiae said,

October 19, 2011 at 22:33

oh, that’s right…i forgot you are from these here parts…then you should know why so.dak. doesn’t have a pro team…

Dear fucking lord … I’m trying to think of a more overrated QB in NFL history

I think Eli Manning is more overrated.

If only there were hot wimmin on Green Bay, he might not have been overwhelmed by our supermodels.

Wimmin who are susceptible to meatheads wearing crocs? Yeah, I admit that there aren’t many of those in Wisconsin.

Perhaps he was simply bored in your town.

Dear fucking lord … I’m trying to think of a more overrated QB in NFL history

Tebow?

Professional mouse batting is a fucking joke, nowadays.

The designated hitter ruined Professional mouse batting.

I CAN PAINT WITH MY POOP

I have met the real Jay Ambrose, and believe me, this is not the real Jay Ambrose. This one isn’t as cluelessly blind as the real one.

Dear fucking lord … I’m trying to think of a more overrated QB in NFL history

imma throwdown tommy kramer…

The designated hitter ruined Professional mouse batting.

What’s that? The designated Hitler rule?? I’m playin’ the Godwin card on you fer sure.

Perhaps he was simply bored in your town.

Unpossible.

Tebow?

He’s pretty universally disliked and rated as a third stringer at best. He’s just seen as the “hey give the new kid a try, he can’t do any worse than this chump”. Poor Orton. I actually kinda like the guy, but he’s just not that good.

The designated Hitler rule??

I can’t believe this never occured to me ever before you’d steal my joke!!!!

The designated hitter ruined Professional mouse batting.
Dear fucking lord … I’m trying to think of a more overrated DB in NMBL history than Stuart fucking Little

The rest of you are poseurs.

One last thing: if you listen to the sports media and bobblehead commentators, everyone else has something positive going for them even if the team sucks: a star player, a likable city, fans, great history…and then they get to D.C., and it’s like “why does this city even have a team?” Nationally, every sport here is treated like a joke. Sure, we have a history, but it’s not like the guys on air today know or care to talk about it.

One season does not a career make. He never got within 700 yards of that mark (and even then, only once) and he had 173 TDs vs. 220 INTs.

So I stand by my “overrated” remark.

Oh, and Hank Stram invented what is now known as the WCO, thankyouverymuch. He was also the first in the NFL to use a two-tight-end set*, the moving pocket, the tight-I formation*, and zone defense more than man-to-man*.

I said good day, sir!

GOOD DAY!!

(*VallkindsofstuffR)

Tebow?

Tim “My grandmother can stir cookie dough faster than a Tim Tebow pass” Tebow?

There’s plenty of good looking women in Wisconsin. And there’s plenty of people with cell phone cameras. If Brett Farve had been associating with any of those women, near a camera it would have been all over the internet a hell of a lot faster than the sexting scandal. If he was trying to get a little on the side and be halfway discreet about it, he sure couldn’t do that here.

One season does not a career make. He never got within 700 yards of that mark (and even then, only once) and he had 173 TDs vs. 220 INTs.

Well, you know, five knee surgeries will do that to a man…

we won shit in the 80?s. Ya-fucking-hoo.

Hey, those three super bowls were pretty damned sweet, really.

P.S. I go way back…I remember Wes Unseld and Elvin Hayes on the Bullets, and Billy vs. Sonny (Sonny, obviously!).
~

I’m trying to think of a more overrated DB in NMBL history than Stuart fucking Little

The fuck that played for the Charlotte Webs.

Okay … I’m gonna have to give it to you, Pryme. With The Dan, y’all are fucked. At least until he dies.

**hands keys to Sucktown to Pryme**

Sorry ’bout the mess …

Billy vs. Sonny

Billy “Makes a Tim Tebow pass look like a Nolan Ryan fastball” Kilmer? That Billy?

There’s a lot of hating on Tim Tebow for the speed of his passing, but to fair, none of you could write the lord’s prayer on a football between the snap and the throw any faster than he could.

okay, boys…all your sports boo-hooing doesn’t matter…you have all apparently forgotten THIS

That’s the one.

But he wasn’t a threat to Nixon asslicker coach Allen, so there you go.
~

“I am just sitting here quietly in the land of the Badgers, the Brewers, and the Packers, watching you all flagellate yourselves.”

This is what happens when you people forget to turn off your webcams: zombies watch you masturbate.

you have all apparently forgotten THIS

The hell you say!

There’s a lot of hating on Tim Tebow for the speed of his passing, but to fair, none of you could write the lord’s prayer on a football between the snap and the throw any faster than he could.

He might complete a few dozen more passes if he stopped putting smiley faces as dots over the i’s

I am just sitting here quietly in the land of the Badgers

Damn Greasemonkey…

Dear fucking lord … I’m trying to think of a more overrated DB in NMBL history than Stuart fucking Little

The LULZ — I haz them!

The hell you say!

oh, heh…i knew that was on your blog…jklol!!!

oh, heh…i knew that was on your blog…jklol!!!

Herman Cain is that you?!?!?!

…they get to D.C., and it’s like “why does this city even have a team?” Nationally, every sport here is treated like a joke.

Yeah, but at least you got a good musical out of the Senators before they moved out.

Yeah, but at least you got a good musical out of the Senators before they moved out.

Yea, but named after the other team.

WTF are you all talking about? Who are these alleged “football teams?” Football, as everyone knows, is played on Saturday.

Football, as everyone knows, is played on Saturday.

Except for the two Sunday games, usually involving Chelsea.

It’s like watching a bunch of cats bat around the dismembered remains of a mouse.

When the white-lab-coat disguise no longer allows one to sneak into the autopsy rooms, one learns to make the most of whatever entertainment is left.

File this under the stopped clock category: Santorum says something true – http://theweek.com/article/index/220484/the-american-dream-moves-to-denmark

One has to admit that the Nats have real potential to cause misery.

I feel like I should take this time to inform you that tsam’s two favorite teams are the Dallas Cowboys and the Pittsburg Steelers.

I feel like I should take this time to inform you that tsam’s two favorite teams are the Dallas Cowboys and the Pittsburg Steelers.

TROLL! HOW DARE YOU?

I feel like I should take this time to inform you that tsam’s two favorite teams are the Dallas Cowboys and the Pittsburg Steelers.

indeed…he luuuuuuuuuuuvs him some *steelers**

*vphallicr

cripes, i AM bored!

Santorum says something true

Isn’t his solution still to deregulate everything and take a huger shit on the poor?

It’s you wimmins that dig the steel, IYKWIMAIKYD

oh, good dog! here is an odious email i just received…let the man be dead already!

Awwwww, yeah.

Wait, you meant your steely erection, right?

It’s you wimmins that dig the steel, IYKWIMAIKYD

give me a break…hubbkf has been gone all week…

And WHERE is actor?

And WHERE is actor?

hmm? wait…what?

If a guy shows up at your house calling himself Carl Salamander–DON’T LET HIM IN: IT’S REALLY TINTIN.

Wait, you meant your steely erection, right?

OH YEAH. Yeah.

he’s coming from inside the house!

S. cerevisiae said,

Viking, Twin and Wild fan here – this has been a true year of suckitude…

I see you failed to mention the Oregon State Beavers and the top notch season they’re having?

Or are you not a beaver fan?*

*Yes. I feel sorry for the women’s teams at this university.

Isn’t his solution still to deregulate everything and take a huger shit on the poor?

Exactly! He lacks the self-awareness to realize he just advocated for TEH EBIL SOSHALIZM!

He undercut the entire right-wing agenda. And didn’t even realize it.

And yet I see nothing about the horrors of the Saddam regime here.

Yeah—like the death penalty for rape, and women being half the university population and half the professional population, and headdress being optional by law. But it’s a lot better for Shia-types who want to be ruled by right-wing religious fanatics because now women who are raped are expected to commit suicide to spare their family the shame, and women are afraid to leave the house.

Woot.

vacuumslayer is crazy tiyerd said,
Wait, you meant your steely erection, right?

I hear along with teh steelers, he really likes Steely Dan…

*Yes. I feel sorry for the women’s teams at this university.

Worse than the Gamecocks?

I hear along with teh steelers, he really likes Steely Dan…

especially their rendition of sweet home alabama…makes him crazy, it does…

he’s coming from inside the house!

HE’S CU…

Oh, never mind.

Steely HAM, more like.

And Sweet Moan of your Mama….

Sing it–it works!

Oh yes, OBS, I was not forgetting our Beavers. When does college baseball start again? I’ll bet the headline writers have to restrain themselves in regards to stories involving the Beavers; Trojans Pound Beavers et.al. Too bad they never play South Carolina.

Trojans Pound Beavers et.al. Too bad they never play South Carolina.

Heh. “Cougars lick Beavers, highlights at eleven!”

And where is actor? He must’ve been abducted.

As far as stupid team names go, you simply can’t do better (worse) than Stanford.

The Cardinal. WTF is that?

(A rhetorical question. I know what it is: A pathetic attempt to copy Harvard and “The Crimson.”)

THE END OF THE UNIVERSE said,

I hear there’s a great restaurant there.

Nested

blockquotes

are

so

passé

“THE END OF THE UNIVERSE said,”

This is why S,N can’t have nice things.

I hear there’s a great restaurant there.

The food isn’t much, but you can’t beat the view.

SASQUATCH ISREAL!

http://theweek.com/article/index/220484/the-american-dream-moves-to-denmark

No-one could possibly have predicted that there would be innovation and social mobility and a dynamic economy in a society with safety nets… where people are not discouraged from changing jobs or becoming entrepreneurs, because failure will not reduce them to selling their organs.

ADDRESS MY POOPY, LIBS!!!

Bitter Scribe, what if the Cardinal is Torquemada? If the home crowd got creative it could be epic. After all, nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

Why does Hollywood pick on the Catholic religion? Was it the baby-fucking or what?

The end of the universe is a bung not a walnut

vacuumslayer is right way up thread.

They have no intention of actually electing Herman Cain, but Herman Cain is who they will be awkwardly using to try and pretend they aren’t racist for as long as they can. If a nutjob like Perry or Bachmann win the nomination, expect to see Cain pipped for VP.

And yeah, it’s about as transparent as the attempt to “appeal to women” by casting Sarah Palin as VP in 2008.

I don’t think I’ve seen a single mushy headed middle-of-the-road person go “durr, these guys have been full-on-racist against Obama, but now they support a black guy, uh doy, I must have been wrong about them being racist. They even support him as long as he sings and dances for them and doesn’t call them out on minor issues like using a location called Niggerhead for illegal pay-for-play schemes well into the 2000s”.

It’s entirely right-wingnuts trying to argue that this absolves all their racist sins and somehow proves that liberals are the true racists.

It’s more sad really. No one is buying this shit and because no one is buying it, the reaction on the left is one more of pity. It’s like, “how mind-numbingly racist do you have to be to think this would work, that we’ve long passed the time of ‘I have one black friend or 1 black public figure I support, so lay off me’?” And we pity Herman Cain for the minstrel show job he has managed to trap himself into. It demeans him and while we will sadly shake our heads at any minority who sucks up to the people who hate hir so they can be “one of the good ones”, it really is hard to watch someone choose that battle and watch as they are kicked and demeaned even further as their tormentors clap themselves on the back for how non-racist they are because they allow their boots to touch black flesh.

So yeah, we’ll be seeing them continue to try and erase 4 years of intense racist freakout with a display that will make Sarah Palin as feminist look respectful and dignified and honestly, it’s just more sad.

We know, they know, and the idiots in the middle have just seen too much and it’s simply way too late in our social history for these types of demeaning tokenism to be anything more than further confirmation that the GOP is less diverse than a Klan rally and will never support anything more.

Isn’t [Santorum’s] solution still to deregulate everything and take a huger shit on the poor?

Plus, according to DKos, he’s gonna get rid of contraception, too. That’ll make everything all better in this country.

Seriously though, I’m actually vaguely entertained by the whole rigmarole. They got themselves so het up to respond to left-wing anger at Herman Cain, a chance to define themselves as white knight to this one specific black guy so they could pretend not to be racist that they forgot to check that the left actually gave a flying fuck.

So they are all out in force. “Nuh uh, we are the true defenders of this black man, we will protect him against your slings and arrows, racists!” Talking up their long and suddenly acquired service on Team Cain and being down with the funky brother. And it is even sadder, because the response on the left has been consistently either pity or polite mockery.

Despite the ideas being really terrible ideas, many of the other candidates are worse and honestly they could easily do a lot worse. No one really believes he has a prayer because frankly, this is a party entirely motivated by the “offensiveness” of having a black man in a “white man’s office” even while the economy continues to crash and burn.

So they come in guns blazing against an “angry left” and they are performing this charade against a background of “isn’t this just sad” and “I actually feel bad for Cain, poor capo bastard”.

It just adds that extra element of sad fail to the whole exercise and the fake earnestness of the right as they do it just makes it even more poignant.

Like watching a six-year old beat themselves up re-enacting a death scene from a movie.

And yeah, it’s about as transparent as the attempt to “appeal to women” by casting Sarah Palin as VP in 2008.

I don’t buy that the Palin thing was meant to appeal to women. Part of it was the “look, we got a woman, we’re not sexist anymore!” and part of it was appealing to rednecks for whom she was the woman of their dreams (dumb, sexy and aware of her “proper place.”) I don’t think women were the target in the first place.

It demeans him and while we will sadly shake our heads at any minority who sucks up to the people who hate hir so they can be “one of the good ones”, it really is hard to watch someone choose that battle and watch as they are kicked and demeaned even further as their tormentors clap themselves on the back for how non-racist they are because they allow their boots to touch black flesh.

Part of me wonders how fucked up people like Cain have to be to embrace people who treat them that way, but really, it’s no different from the baseline conservative voter getting worked up about the teabaggers, Bush, the Gingrich revolution or the Reaganites while these people rob them blind and kick them in the ass. It’s more blatant with minorities, but almost all GOP voters have that Stockholm Syndrome thing in one way or another.

There are two GOP’s. The Stockholm crowd is the economically illiterate group that thinks that a flat tax and a flat tax rate cut are equal for everyone, for example. These are the ones that are really hurting themselves and everyone else.

The other GOP are those “values voters”. These are people who decided that hate was a value and that others deserve to be oppressed because they’re perceived to be different.

Both are tools in the same shed.

OK, now that I actually have some time–watch me jinx this–lemme spell out for you why the “WE’RE NOT RACIST!!” thing is bullshit.

Here’s the thing: my grandmother was a racist. I also vaguely remember her being fairly conservative. Hell, were she still alive today she might even be a teabagger, though she was a very elegant woman and it’s hard to imagine her fitting in with that crowd. But elegant or no she was a racist.

I’m sure she didn’t think of herself as a racist. But she was one. I vividly remember when I was in my…tweens?…watching The Price is Right with Her…a clean-cut Black man in dress military garb came on and spun the wheel. She very much approved of him! He was nice! He was clean-cut!

But guess what? Liking a few people who conform to a standard you think they should conform to is not being tolerant. My grandmother was STILL A RACIST, even though she liked THAT BLACK GUY.

Like your gay cousin who dresses conservatively and doesn’t act too “flamboyant?” Maybe he doesn’t push too hard for gay marriage? You’re still a homophobe.

It’s like the misogynist woman who loves to crack on feminists. OF COURSE misogynists (and conservatives, but I repeat myself) love those chicks–they’re validating!!!

So quit with the “liberals are the real racists” bullshit. Nobody’s buying your nonsense.

It appears I missed the latest troll-du-jour. Should I bookmark or address his posts?

There are two GOP’s. The Stockholm crowd is the economically illiterate group that thinks that a flat tax and a flat tax rate cut are equal for everyone, for example. These are the ones that are really hurting themselves and everyone else.

Both are tools in the same shed.

I’d say they’re often the same tool. A lot of the reason why people choose to believe the economic illiteracy is because it’s spouted by people who those who blame “these people” for all the world’s ills and promise to punish them. And a lot of the reason the “values voters” feel safe enough to indulge their “I hate these people” instincts is because they believe that politicians who attack “these people” won’t come for them next.

Trying again for clarity:

“I’d say they’re often the same tool. A lot of the reason why people choose to believe the economic illiteracy is because it’s spouted by politicians who blame “these people” for all the world’s ills and promise to punish them. And a lot of the reason the “values voters” feel safe enough to indulge their bigoted instincts is because they believe that politicians who attack “these people” won’t come for them next.”

The comments on that nazi-hash-mark post in PJM ended with a volley of devastating liberal critique of wingnut stupidity and paranoia.

I think I’m going to like trolling them, and was in need of a gimp-appropriate hobby.

Got off the boat, and gathered me some mangos. Stupid shit is stupid to the bone.

Though the church was nondenominational, the majority of them were likely raised Baptist and were familiar with the songs.

Having been forced to attend Baptist churches where no negro could be found from the age of 6 to the age of 14, I can assure you that we sang no “negro spirituals.” We sung Protestant-Hymns- for-the-Tone-Deaf-Who-have- no-Rhythm. You know—miserable white people.

Astonishingly, the slaves did not lose their faith, even amidst the horrors of slavery. Instead, they summoned God Himself through their sonorous songs. Rather than descend into misery and despair, the slaves sang words that invoked God’s mercy and deep and abiding love.

Astonishingly, God was the only one who didn’t smack them down when they complained or asked to be treated like human beings. They sang their misery and to their credit, even miserable white bastards had to admit that they sang real good and their songs were better than the shit that little cartoon character—I wanna singa, like the moona, and the joona, and the springa—had to sing when he was being punished for singing jazz.

Out of curiosity, anyone remember that Protestant hymn Katherine Hepburn’s character sang in the “African Queen”. It went on, and on, and on, and on in excruciation bland-dom.

What’s with the green text and underlining of “sermon,” “generator,” and “appearance?” (Oh, nevermind my 24/7 cuddly tech guy just explained it. (hawking it ain’t they))

So quit with the “liberals are the real racists” bullshit. Nobody’s buying your nonsense.

But what if I AM a real racist? I have a serious problem with the Swiss.

What, nobody posted this yet?

Wow, the “hollywood hates catholic” post is gloriously covered in mangos.

Why does Hollywood seem to despise Roman Catholicism?

Shockingly enough he really doesn’t have a follow-up to this. You know, movies being about catholic bad guys or the catholic villain being the staple and all that.

Maybe that’s because they aren’t. Hell, even with all the kiddie-fucking and gross corruption, movies that tackle that subject matter have been few and far between. I mean, there was “Doubt” and there was…”Doubt”.

I mean they’ve had to tone down a little on the “friendly neighborhood catholic priest that helps the troubled boys character” because that has different connotations these days, but there is no shortage of “we grew up young and poor and white and catholic on the lower east side” movies out there.

Especially in boxing movies. Endless arrays of white catholic boys breaking in and doing their “ma”s proud despite the sport of boxing in reality being dominated by black and latino stars for entire generations. And no, there’s nothing racist going on there in our continued search for a fictional great white hope even into the 2000s while movies about fictional black boxers are still rarer than a straight republican.

But I digress.

no religion to them is more anathema than Roman Catholicism.

Evidence being?

The latest swipe at the world’s largest Christian population, all 1.1 billion of us (plus another 240 million Eastern Orthodox) comes from, surprise surprise, uber-leftist Susan Sarandon.

All of Hollywood hates catholics more than every other religion because one actress made a mildly disparaging comment about the pope?

My word, how do conservatives live under such oppression? Why several times a week, whole ones of people mildly speak ill of people who do terrible crimes against humanity and then cover it up and declare themselves above the law while they condemn millions to die and suffer because of an ideological belief. Can you imagine anything worse than that?

It’s like being…you know, having something shoved down your throat….by like an authority figure who is viewed as above reproach in the community or something.

It is interesting that she should accuse Pope Benedict XVI of being a “Nazi” at this time because I was trying to figure a way to discuss all the good that Roman Catholics have done through incredible acts of bravery and self-sacrifice over the years.

So you couldn’t find any examples of that either?

Hi-oh!

To call the Pope a Nazi because, like all German youths, he was conscripted into the Hitler Youth during the Fuehrer’s reign of absolute power may provide Ms. Sarandon with a shot of self-righteous hauteur she so desperately craves. It also shows a lack of historical understanding that seems to be a requirement if one wishes to join the coterie of far-left fantasy-performer/activists.

Just because calling him a nazi is actually entirely accurate, because he was actually a member of the nazi party, is no means by which we can’t pretend that this is a despicable Godwin.

I love that…Calling him a nazi, why that’s…(whisper, whisper, whisper), oh, entirely accurate, well, I reserve the right to be offended nonetheless. Just because you are accurately cataloguing reality is no reason why you aren’t a fantasy left crazy person, nuh uh, you need to be on meds, doctor man, I am Elmer J Fudd, I own a mansion and a yacht! Liberals in my teeth!

Ok, will be back for more mangos.

Sorry I’m late to the show, and missed Jay’s tour de force.

So, ah, Robin of Berzerklee admires “The Impossible Dream” as emblematic of Herman Cain.

Isn’t the character who originated the song, Don Quixote, an addlepated old man who has a distorted view of everything he sees, mistaking hovels for palace, hookers for royal ladies, and goatherds for knights?

That’s about right, I’d say

Ok, will be back for more mangos.

i looked in the comments and found this lovely:
What do you expect from a live in sin whoremonger who is breeding bastards?

and this commentor’s avatar is an eagle w/an american flag background…hmmm, obviously freedom and liberty do not mean what he /she thinks they mean…

There is no denying the Church was engaged in a monstrous scandal and one over which it should be ashamed and contrite.

Uh huh…

But actually calling the perpetrators and those who aided them out on their bullshit…THAT is just unseemly raw hate that’s worse than any religion has ever suffered ever (oh HAI Islam and Judaism, I didn’t see you there).

Today, there are more than 400,000 priests which would indicate that, although those guilty members committed vile, disgusting and inexcusable crimes — and the Church’s attempt at masking the problem was just as criminal in my mind — an overwhelming number of Catholic clergy are truly pious keepers of the faith.

Cover up, massive collusion by “good guys”, direct blocking of independent authorities for decades thus creating diminished guesses at the true number of bad guys, the fact that the bad guys sometimes accumulated thousands of victims, and so on?

Hand-waved.

Nuh uh uh, I hand-waved that, you can’t bring it up. Small number of priests, all solved, not allowed to ever bring it up again. Lalalala I’m not listening.

Yet it is the crimes alone that the left sees when they bother to even examine Catholicism at all.

That, the attacks on women’s rights, the exploitation of latin american and african people, the support of fascist movements, various war crimes, and not to mention that whole Mission thing or that Inquisition thing. But sure, we only see the massive conspiracy to protect child molestors from any authority or punishment and continuing to place them in charge of children while also claiming you are a religious authority worthy of intervening for our “morality” in private matters among non-believers.

Oddly enough, one positive portrayal of a truly noble Catholic in film comes from an unlikely source: accused child molester Roman Polanski. The director’s 2002 film ‘The Pianist’ spotlighted the true-life German soldier whose kindness kept the Jewish main character, Wladyslaw Szpilman (Adrien Brody), alive and in hiding until the Russians arrived in Warsaw.

Yes, that is the only sign of a positive priest. There wasn’t at all a trope of the hero priest in movies throughout the 80s and 90s into the 2000s nor is every boxing movie and half the “cop dramas” about good catholic boys. Nope, you have to really dig to find a good catholic.

I see why he tried to stay off direct examples to make this argument of persecution.

Like the Pope himself, Hosenfeld started off with a Nazi affiliation.

Ah, that’s why he went this route.

Okay, the Pope was a nazi, but see in movies, there were good nazis all the time who betrayed their country and protected the jews. So, he could have been like that.

I mean, there’s zero evidence that he did so and in fact while fictional and semi-fictional nazis have had changes of heart, Ratfucker didn’t once risk his neck to save a single Jew.

And it isn’t just this, the author goes on for a bunch more paragraphs giving this one decent fuck a giant blowjob and the thing that forgives all catholics and makes them wonderful (because the Catholic Church wasn’t doing things like supporting the Fascist Parties of Italy, Spain, and Germany or anything). He never again returns to Ratfucker. Because apparently the Pope is so fucking evil that you need a stand-in “Good German” just to make him look redeemable.

Hell of a hagiography there. Why exactly was noting his nazi origins so bad again?

Okay, last mango trip in five.

But what if I AM a real racist? I have a serious problem with the Swiss.

Don’t get me started on the Belgians.

Yes. The “Impossible Dream” was really like a “negro spiritual” because the Temptations covered it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmVD2M3icCw&feature=fvsr

See Lancelot’s link about the organization to help the one of seven African-Americans who are born without soul.

Jim Neighbors (can you believe Goober can sing so swell? My gawds, wonders never cease) also recorded this song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5KeGccP9Jk

And yes:

song is sung all the way through once in the musical by Don Quixote as he stands vigil over his armor, in response to Aldonza (Dulcinea)’s question about what he means by “following the quest”. It is reprised partially three more times—the last by prisoners in a dungeon as Miguel de Cervantes and his manservant mount the drawbridge-like prison staircase to face trial by the Spanish Inquisition.

Of course. No one saw it coming. The “Impossible Dream” is the perfect song for Cain to delight his lily white crowds with because running for President is just like jousting with windmills and being on trial with the Spanish Inquisition.

one out of

grrrr

I TOLD you all the one and only reason the baggers would go for Cain was so they could play the “WE’RE NOT RACIST–NEENER NEENER BOO BOO!!” card. It begins and ends with pissing off liberals always with the baggers.

In fact it would be smart for them to get this out of the way, since their best guy is Romney and he already lost to the guy who previously was beaten by the Kenyan Chicago-gangster Socialist Muslim Elitist Fat Cat.

Because it would be smart, they probably won’t do it. But, there’s no overestimating Romney’s complete lack of appeal.

Okay, the Pope was a nazi, but see in movies, there were good nazis all the time who betrayed their country and protected the jews. So, he could have been like that.

As much as I love the art, I hate it that the Catholic Church invested so much in smuggling art work out of the country when they could have been smuggling people.

Oh, and I just had to see this again: the Iraq War, still the greatest international alliance victory in history

words fail.

Hollywood caters well to Catholics in the horror department. Movies like “The Omen”, “Amityville Horror”, “The Exorcist”, etc. If someone not genuflecting, or someone pissing in the holy water scares you, you’re seriously Catholic and there are movies out there just for you.

g, 99.44% guaranteed that was a parody troll.

You want real trolls?

FAUX pays ’em.
~

It’s certainly the way George W. Bush handled the Iraq War, still the greatest international alliance victory in history

This has to be a troll. No real person is this stupid.

So after paragraph after paragraph of “the guy in the Pianist was a good guy” who sometimes ocassionally almost thought about speaking out against the treatment of the Jews and besides totally protected like one or two so the pope must be a good guy by association. Because being catholic is all about almost thinking about maybe doing the right thing sometimes, where does he go from here to try and distract from the fact that he’s almost done with his long ass post and hasn’t yet established a) hollywood has beef against catholics and b) calling the pope a nazi is inaccurate and offensive.

Islam and Abortion.

In Baghdad on a Sunday afternoon, October 31, 2010, a young woman named Raghada al-Wafi ran into her cathedral – Our Lady of Salvation – with wonderful news to share with the priest who had married her: she was going to have a baby. The priest happily bestowed a blessing. It ended up being the last act of their lives. Moments later, the priest, Raghada and her unborn child were slaughtered. They were among the Catholic faithful killed by terrorist gunmen who stormed into the church and accused the Christians of being infidels.

You thought I was kidding.

Nope, just straight into “unborn baby killed by islamoterrorists”.

Also, glad there were no cases of wholesale slaughter of muslims for being muslim by christian forces including catholics who were urged to “contribute their cause for this new crusade against the muslim threat”. You know… in Baghdad or the surrounding region.

Missiles at a wedding? Why they pale in comparison to UNBORN BABIES BEING MURDERED. Why, those are worth a million real born people.

Since then, the 8 million Coptic Christians in Egypt have been routinely persecuted, their clergy murdered, the faithful beaten, churches burned.

Oh hey, want to bet there’s some serious rounding here? And let’s not count the millions of innocent muslims killed as “collateral damage” in our unending “war on terror but only if a muslim does it” nor how that number would skyrocket like a motherfucker if we included “routinely persecuted” or “clergy murdered” in the equation. Fuck, we haven’t taken mosque burnings seriously in this country since 9/11 but we’re going to poo-poo on a third-world nation? And let’s not even get into what our little “missionaries” in Africa have been doing to Muslim faithful there.

But apparently Ms. Sarandon feels that, despite the overwhelming good that the Church does throughout the world, often suffering along the way, all she can say about its spiritual head is that he is a “Nazi.”

Yeah! Uh! As long as Islam exists we can’t ever say a mild accurate statement about the Pope. Also why aren’t we using Muslims as bad guys in every movie rather than every other?

I guess technically then so was Wilm Hosenfeld. But what fun is learning history, when ignorant histrionics will suffice?

Yeah, you also aren’t allowed to mock Nazis. Hitler is off limits! Wait…nuh uh, you are the one who doesn’t know history. Hitler saved us with his atom bombs from the Islamocommunist Menace! I eat bugs! Who stole my Radio?!?

Now bring it home!

Now, devout Catholics like Hosenfeld, al-Wafi , the Coptic Catholics suffering alongside their more numerous Orthodox brothers and sisters and the many others throughout the world may not show as much moral conviction and courage as an actress sniping at the Pope from the plush confines of a Sag Harbor film festival.

Liberal elitists!

C’mon, you got it in you, one more!

Still, I think it’s time for the Hollywood crowd to turn its critical eye towards those who create the martyrs rather than those who bravely offer themselves upon the altar of a religion whose founding principles remain as beautifully powerful and true today as when Christ was born in obscurity two millennia ago: peace on earth and good will towards mankind.

All enemies and disparaging comments must be made about Islam. As long as Islam exists, you can’t criticize Catholicism or acknowledge factual realities about the Pope.

Now as long as there is a single terrorist out there- No, Breivik doesn’t fucking count! – then we should be allowed to rape our kids in peace.

Here, Melinda. Daddy wants to play a game for his home movies. Liberals trying to attack the pope, I’ll show you what we do to little sluts who do that. C’mon honey, daddy’s not going to hurt you. Now call him a nazi again, I dare you!

This has to be a troll. No real person is this stupid.

Ahem. You’ve seen the hashmark/Hitler post, no?

Seriously though, Big Hollywood is comedy gold.

And yes, the comments are basically all one of two responses:

A) Yeah, show that filthy whore slut Sarandon, I would cram my cock in her to get her to shut up, what a idiot.

or

B) Yeah, totally, the existence of one or two good nazis who almost kinda sort of helped people erases any bad any nazi ever did ever.

And I’m a bit surprised on B. I guess the “Liberal Fascism” and “Hitler was a commie” meme generation has led to its natural conclusion, whitewashing all nazis as “just some guy, you know?”

How many years do you think before they are openly cheering on neo-nazis for being neo-nazis rather than couching it in terms like “I support their stance on Islam”.

Best comment mango:

Phew… thanks man. Liberals have constantly rewritten history. They’ve taken over science, the Universities, any Federal education program, the media, the entertainment… the culture WAR is upon us. Time for Christians to speak out, ALL THE TIME.

There is nothing to add to this.

It’s projection so perfect that the MPAA is willing to blow a half billion dollars just to learn its secrets.

No wait, even better comment mango:

If Sarandon considers the Pope a ‘Nazi’, just what does that make Soros in her mind.

Yes, this is real. Someone wrote this and nothing clicked in from the self-preservation instinct to say, “hmm, maybe I should rethink this, something seems off about this”. Nope.

Just, oh yeah, if you think a nazi was a nazi, what do you think about your jew!

I’m not entirely sure these people are entirely human.

Should I bookmark or address his posts?

I have it on good authority that if you forget to turn off your webcam a zombie will watch if you do either of those things. Also too: Ceiling Cat.

The latest swipe at the world’s largest Christian population, all 1.1 billion of us (plus another 240 million Eastern Orthodox) comes from, surprise surprise, uber-leftist Susan Sarandon.

Plus Eastern Orthodox? Because they give a shit what anyone thinks about the POPE?!! Jesus, I bet a lot of Catholics don’t even give a shit.

As far as the bit about Denmark having a better economy with more class mobility that got cited earlier in this post.

Yeah, no shit. I wonder if there was some form of policy or collection of policies, that made this possible. Some attitude to spending, taxing, and how strenuous a safety net there should be that differed from ours in every way…

On that note, I wonder how much longer the rich owners can keep the scam going now that the “we need to support the free market or become like those horrible countries with high tax rates and free services” is routinely answered by “yeah, like Scandanavia who is kicking our ass right now”.

I mean they might have a few more decades in old people Pavolvian responses to “socialism”, but the idea that high taxes and “abusable safety nets” leading to ruin is pretty hard to sustain when we’re collapsing like a syphilitic whore on his last legs and the countries “living the nightmare” are turning into tiny juggernauts with hotter women.

Also, glad there were no cases of wholesale slaughter of muslims for being muslim by christian forces

Gosh, wasn’t there a thing back in the ’90s someplace in Eastern Europe…what was it? started with a B or maybe an S, I think…..

Yes, this is real. Someone wrote this and nothing clicked in from the self-preservation instinct to say, “hmm, maybe I should rethink this, something seems off about this”. Nope.

I’m not entirely sure these people are entirely human.

I don’t know much about Soros: I vaguely remember PJM accusations about him having been a Judenrat (Jew who turned in other Jews to the Nazis), but that’s… hardly a reliable source… so, I just went and looked at his wikipedia page. Wow:

Soros was thirteen years old in March 1944 when Nazi Germany occupied Hungary.[12] Soros took a job with the Jewish Council,[9] which had been established during the Nazi occupation of Hungary to carry out Nazi and Hungarian government anti-Jewish measures.[13][14] Soros later described this time to writer Michael Lewis:

The Jewish Council asked the little kids to hand out the deportation notices. I was told to go to the Jewish Council. And there I was given these small slips of paper…It said report to the rabbi seminary at 9 am…And I was given this list of names. I took this piece of paper to my father. He instantly recognized it. This was a list of Hungarian Jewish lawyers. He said, “You deliver the slips of paper and tell the people that if they report they will be deported.”

Amazing: so Soros is a dude who actually used his position in the system to help Undesirables by warning them of impending arrests. But instead of admiring him, we’re supposed to call him a Nazi because Jonah Goldberg says liberals are Nazis. But on the other hand we’re supposed to go easy on the Pope because he might have done the same thing if he’d been a fictional character in a Hollywood movie.

No, these people are human… but I’m afraid our species has as many low points as high. And this is about as low as it gets.

tigris-

My favorite part was that he got all het up about his Leather Daddy being made fun of and how that was Holocaust Times 12 and then had to notice “ah shit, she was right, he was a nazi” and instead of finding a different topic to write, just doubled down and started arguing “nazis are heroes” and anyone who doesn’t know that is ignorant about history.

Either that or the fact that it worked and the mouthbreathers are all “yep, she sure is ignorant to think that nazis is bad”.

That is a collection of individuals who don’t even need the words anymore. They’re in it entirely for the tribal identity.

Gosh, wasn’t there a thing back in the ’90s someplace in Eastern Europe…what was it? started with a B or maybe an S, I think…..

You mean the ethnic cleansing that I’ve read people in the PJM comments section talking about from time to time? Something about how Milosevic was totally right! for defending his culture from the Muslim Peril, and Clinton was an al-Qaeda sympathizer, Western Culture hater and all around big meanie because he didn’t let the forces of Truth and Beauty give those rat-bastards what was coming to them?

I think I’ve heard about that too.

Ho ho, this site certainly is interesting as you liberals flail and fail to keep amusing yourselves off your smug sense of superiority. I would recommend starting a new topic. Especially as your argument against Cain is nothing outside of spin and, to be frank, some serious derangement. Would I look to your better nature and not think that it’s really you who are the racists? I think I have my answer. I think you know what it is.

Chris-

Amazing: so Soros is a dude who actually used his position in the system to help Undesirables by warning them of impending arrests. But instead of admiring him, we’re supposed to call him a Nazi because Jonah Goldberg says liberals are Nazis. But on the other hand we’re supposed to go easy on the Pope because he might have done the same thing if he’d been a fictional character in a Hollywood movie.

The real kicker is that they then turn around and argue we need to start nuking Iran, because the figurehead president engages in Holocaust Denialism. What’s Holocaust Denialism? Pretending that the Jews were the real bad guys of the affair and it wasn’t a big deal and the actual Nazis were just some guy you know who didn’t do anything that bad and are being randomly and unfairly attacked for it, you know?

So, yeah, projection, thy name is wingnut. Always, 100%, no matter the issue.

Additionally, instead of using the stale liberal tactic of just repeating what I said and laughing at it, as if that constitutes an argument in of itself, why don’t you tell me how the Iraq War was not a success? Objectives were achieved. The mission truly was a success, despite all nattering from the liberal media in support of the enemy.

Jay Ambrose:

Wow, being unaware of all internet traditions and not reading the thread can really backfire, can’t it?

Well, at least we get the subtle hilarity of your unfortunate timing.

Oh, Jay, we have been firmly reprimanded! Your work is done here, now you may go.

Don’t let the door hit you on the ass on the way out.

Additionally, instead of using the stale liberal tactic of just repeating what I said and laughing at it, as if that constitutes an argument in of itself, why don’t you tell me how the Iraq War was not a success? Objectives were achieved. The mission truly was a success, despite all nattering from the liberal media in support of the enemy.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

liberal tactic of just repeating what I said and laughing at it

Oh, you dear little man! that’s the site’s raison d’etre!

Eat this you sniveling piece of shit:

War is bestowed like electroshock on the depressive nation; thousands of volts jolting the system, an artificial galvanizing, one effect of which is loss of memory. War comes at the end of the twentieth century as absolute failure of imagination, scientific and political. That a war can be represented as helping a people to “feel good” about themselves, their country, is a measure of that failure.

~ADRIENNE RICH

Clearly a lesbian poet is wise to the ways of foreign policy. Mercy, do you liberals ever learn? Your entertainers are just that.

why don’t you tell me how the Iraq War was not a success? Objectives were achieved.

Today, I am declaring my kitchen a success. Sure, I entered with the goal of making a simple salami sandwich, but I assure you objectives were achieved. Sure, 19 firemen lost their lives, the floor is littered with land mines, there may in fact be a Cthulian Horror living in the fridge, and the ceiling may in fact be coated in a sentient alien beast that feeds on fear, but I am stating that the mission was a success. We have completed an objective.

That is, the left back burner has been successfully turned off. Sure, the other burners have managed to tap into a Hell Dimension to create an unending blaze of sulphuric hate, but the left back burner is off. Objectives have been achieved. This mission has been a complete success and thus we must remain in my kitchen for the next million and a half years battling back the forces of darkness in order to fully appreciate how much a success it is. Pulling out would be the pussy thing to do and may make people suspect we are flaccid and frail. So, stay the course and hail our glorious kitchen success!

And while I would note that the sentiment of “shut up and sing” may be claimed by you liberals to be that of squashing speech, it’s truly the liberal crowd who has that covered in full, from the liberal bias in the media to the classroom to the science lab to the movie studio.

Lesbians are incapable of understanding issues, because the scizzoring gets in the way of their mental functions. For true objective meditations on life you really need an armchair warblogger. Only they have the cheeto-stained fingers necessary to truly understand life.

I mean, GAWD, it’s like you people don’t understand how neuronal pathways work!

liberal bias in the science lab

Damn you, reality and your liberal bias!

heh. Science is a liberal plot. This guy is so wasted he doesn’t even know what he’s saying.

Get off the glue, FakeassJay

Clearly it’s you _________ liberals with the lack of _________ and it’s central to my point that __________ so clearly Cain is a genius in every way and __________ so that’s why I’m right and you’re wrong! Of course Obama _________ and ____________ which shows ___________ and his ___________ cronies don’t want America to succeed because __________ and that’s why he should be impeached and replaced with a REAL american. So ___________ and that’s why. You’re all so __________!

Pretending that the Jews were the real bad guys of the affair and it wasn’t a big deal and the actual Nazis were just some guy you know who didn’t do anything that bad and are being randomly and unfairly attacked for it, you know?

But but but but but but but, they don’t hate ALL Jews, only Soros! And Krugman. But look, they love Israel! Sure their theology dictates that the country has to go up in a great ball of fire for Refusing Teh Jesus, but that doesn’t prove they hate Jews. And you’re the antisemite for suggesting otherwise.

Jay, sweetie, the grownups are talking.

Shouldn’t you be getting ready for beddy-byes?

That Adrienne Rich knows more about foreign policy than Jay Ambrose is obvious. More than pretend-Jay-Ambrose is not worth a sneer.

Hmm, I suppose the original work could use some mango attention.

Okey dokey, OP mango hunting here we come!

I was in a huge, mostly black church in a rough part of town.

Bullshit.

I’m sorry, but everything you have written to date paints a very clear picture of a person who has had zero real world experience with a) people darker than an italian with a farmer’s tan and b) Anything even remotely in the area of Berkeley or an otherwise populated and diverse city. So, bullshit you were “down with the man in their darkest hour”. Also, my guess on “bad part of town” for her is includes more than 1 black person.

The pastor had started delivering his sermon when suddenly most of the lights went out. The stage and the auditorium were very dimly lit.

Uh huh, yeah, sure this happened. And then, Al Jolson sang “Mammy” and white and black hugged as one.

When she reached center stage, she started singing, passionately, a cappella. She sang some sort of “Negro spiritual” (as they were once called), one that I had never heard before. Most of the black people in the audience applauded thunderously and stood up to sing along. Though the church was nondenominational, the majority of them were likely raised Baptist and were familiar with the songs.

Why it’s almost being in a black baptist church (That she was never in, but let’s play along with her story) they would know standard black baptist hymns that Racist McRacist Pants never would have heard of before.

Also, yeah, she watched a movie. She watched a fucking movie. She was never there and she is relating a goddamned movie she watched.

One song led to another and another, and soon most of us, of every race, were standing up, clapping, and trying our best to sing along.

Yeah, things like this. It’s a black baptist church. This is how they express worship. It’s not exotic and if you’ve seen a movie in the last 40 years, you are probably passingly familiar with it. The way she reports this like Jane Goodall with the apes is one of the big reasons that she never in her life would have been the type of person comfortable enough to sit in a black church in the bad part of town. And if she had, she would have been aware that the whole fucking service is like that.

So yeah, no, complete horse shit about her fictional “liberal life” in “liberal Berkeley” before “liberal liberalism” forced this honest woman to become a right-wing racist psychopath.

He appeared moved, astonished, really…swept away by the power of God to bring us all together peacefully in the darkness.

Actually maybe she didn’t see the movie, because if she had, she’d know this is fucking common and not some magical black-white thing that only happens because of God’s love. This is how they worship, because they have a different culture of worship that comes more from emotion and song rather than quiet reverence.

Okay, will have to come back, but we’re halfway through and so far all we’ve got is her usual fiction shtick about how totally liberal and not conservative small town she used to be before the mean old liberals ruined it.

Something about how Milosevic was totally right! for defending his culture from the Muslim Peril

Mark Steyn pursues that line of reasoning. Evidently one can be an apologist for genocide and remain a member in good standing of the Wingnut Welfare system.

the world’s largest Christian population, all 1.1 billion of us (plus another 240 million Eastern Orthodox)

So the Eastern Orthodox church is a form of honorary Catholicism. Why does the commenter stop there? Why not claim Anglicans and Protestants and Ba’hais as Catholics as well?

The Coptic Christians in Egypt seem to be Catholics as well, if the commenter is going to adduce the persecutions inflicted on them (by a power structure in search of scapegoats) as further evidence that Catholics are the underdogs and no-one should point out the Panzerpope’s authoritarian tendencies.

Once, on a borrachero in Panajachel my brand new drinking buddy produced his favorite recording of all time, a cassette entitled “El Sueno Impossible”. A horrendous collection of pop and showtunes performed by an Andean pan flute ensemble. While the Fiddler on the Roof cuts made some going the clear winner was “Puente Sobre Agua Tormentada”.

She watched a fucking movie. She was never there and she is relating a goddamned movie she watched.

This wouldn’t be the first time: there’s a tale she’s told more than once(though never the same) about some Dr or something whose kids committed suicide, but if I’m remembering correctly someone, I think at World of Crap?, recognized the film it was from.

O.K. Here’s a bit of the Iraq War as seen by a heterosexual poet

http://home.comcast.net/~just.tina/abu.html

And a bit of what I wrote to an Iraqi woman, an act that expresses more actual concern about the Iraqi people than crowing about killing their leader:

It’s difficult for me not to feel hopeless about the prospect that the American people will realize what they’ve done to the people of Iraq—realize the brutality, the cruelty, the pathology of our destruction. Realize that the occupation has been inexcusable, illegal, and outrageous. Realize that our government never cared about the people of Iraq. Recognize that invasion and occupation is not an instrument of salvation for anyone.

I have said, “My God! We’re bombing Baghdad—That’s like bombing Paris!” and have been met with scoffs many times. Honestly, I do not understand why that is not obvious… On a political forum today, I asked, “Is it not an eerie absence?” We, as citizens, do not even hear the voice of the Iraqi government, much less the voices of Iraqi people.

Now I will say no more on this thread to this faux-troll or regular troll or whatever it is that thinks it’s smarter than liberals because he appreciates what Bush & NeoCon Pals did to a country that was doing its level best to mind its own business while keeping the electricity on and the water running, and the schools and hospitals functioning after 12 years of brutal sanctions and intermittent bombing.

there were good nazis all the time who betrayed their country and protected the jews. So, he could have been like that.

Sadly, Wilhelm Canaris was Lutheran.

Relevant here:

Soon the Vatican began to receive regular, detailed reports of Nazi atrocities in Poland. The information had been gathered by agents of the Abwehr by order of Canaris, who passed them on to Dr. Josef Muller, a devout Catholic and a leading figure in the Catholic resistance to Hitler. And Muller got the reports safely to Rome.

I thought of this amazing happening when I read about what Herman Cain decided to do when the power went out at his recent speech in Tennessee. He had just started delivering his talk when the generator fueling his mike failed.

So, yeah, not even a movie. She saw this. Went, huh, um, yeah sure, I was at a black church in the projects and this happened and they totally randomly sung too. True story.

So yeah, doesn’t even have the awareness of black american culture given to a fucking regular movie watcher.

After a few awkward moments, Cain did the most amazing thing, something perhaps unique in the annals of politics: he started singing (video) — and an apt song, “The Impossible Dream.” Perhaps inspired by the power of music, Cain even ended his appearance with a hymn about God’s infinite grace and forgiveness called “He Looked Beyond My Faults.”

Someone makes an awkward moment less awkward by turning it into a self-referential performance to try and move past the silence.

Surely, NO ONE ELSE IN HISTORY would have had the foresight to do that. Please ignore anyone who’s whistled or done a little dance as they waited for the tech guys to get their slides going so they could continue their presentation.

They are really stretching themselves for anything they can praise him for when all they can think of is “must…be…seen…as…supporting…
nigger…so….they…don’t…think…I…am…racist”

One could hardly imagine Obama handling the situation so seamlessly and graciously. When his teleprompter fails, Obama is usually rendered speechless or tongue-tied. My guess is that Obama also becomes irritated at the people running the show.

We will hammer this meme home every fucking chance we get, because we will never for a second acknowledge that there really is a black man in charge of this country no matter how many times he humiliates our arguments without a teleprompter.

Ha, ha, black people are stupid.

What? We’re not racist, damn you!

Yet Cain didn’t flinch or get frustrated or angry.

Um, why would he?

Is this a Rushbo saying “they weren’t yelling I want more motherfucking ice tea” sort of situations?

Not surprisingly, the mostly white audience was dazzled.

Let’s play name that response. Our contestants:

a) White audience dazzled by black man performing song and dance routine? Why is there anything with less fraught historical contexts than that?

b) Ah, diversity. They probably had every form of white old person they could find.

Or

c) Hello self-awareness! Bye Self-Awareness!

What Cain did that day reminds me of the legacy of “Negro spirituals,” of how blacks composed and sang them during slavery.

Go on…

Astonishingly, the slaves did not lose their faith, even amidst the horrors of slavery. Instead, they summoned God Himself through their sonorous songs.

Abort, abort! You are way too white and racist to be going down this road!

What a staggering demonstration of character in those slaves, and in the people in my church, and Herman Cain himself.

Oh…oh my no. I’m actually feeling sorry for her with the strength of this fail. If she had any self-awareness she’d be feeling that one in the morning.

Because the White House, and our own houses, will only…can only…be brightened by the spirit of God. And the fact that Cain understands this says to me that he may be the man to return God there.

No religious tests for office? Not on my watch!

But yeah, this end still can’t hold a candle to the whole slavery trainwreck that came before it.

Oh my, these are mangos of sadness. I just feel bad for how bad she would feel if she wasn’t devoid of any self-awareness.

Hmm, now I feel sorry for the vile lying waste of flesh.

Let’s see if there’s anything that could fix that. Hmm, hello different article:

The shooter, Andrers Breivik, grew up a child of divorce, estranged from his father, in a liberal home in a liberal country.
And yet when the press starts pointing fingers, guess which direction they point. Do they gesture leftward, towards a liberal culture that belittles family and religion? Is atheist Europe the culprit for spawning a homicidal maniac? On the contrary…the media chooses the Usual Suspects, that vast right-wing conspiracy.

And there we go. All sympathy gone.

Thank you Robin of Never Seen Berkeley* in her goddamned life for clearing that issue for me.

*Which if you are ever in the area, don’t be a Robin. Do go see Berkeley. It’s a funky awesome city with one of the awesomest fantasy/sci-fi bookstores I’ve ever seen in my life (Dark Carnival).

The shooter, Andrers Breivik, grew up a child of divorce, estranged from his father, in a liberal home in a liberal country.
And yet when the press starts pointing fingers, guess which direction they point. Do they gesture leftward, towards a liberal culture that belittles family and religion? Is atheist Europe the culprit for spawning a homicidal maniac? On the contrary…the media chooses the Usual Suspects, that vast right-wing conspiracy.

It’s LIBERALS’ fault when people try to kill them!

That article also claims that the OKC Bombing was a Muslim plot and that liberals are responsible for every force of evil in the 20th century by claiming that Nazis were liberal and full on erasing groups like the KKK.

Because if you’re going to go all-in on crazy, you really don’t have any room to be halfway sane.

a liberal culture that belittles family and religion?

Can’t deny that the Catholic Church values family, to the extent of setting the price for trafficked infants.

That article also claims that the OKC Bombing was a Muslim plot and that liberals are responsible for every force of evil in the 20th century by claiming that Nazis were liberal and full on erasing groups like the KKK.

What, no “KKK were Democrats therefore liberals and Republicans were always on the right side which is why Trent Lott totally didn’t think the rest of the country should’ve followed KKK Democrat Strom Thurmond’s “lead””?

I’m disappointed.

As much as I love the art, I hate it that the Catholic Church invested so much in smuggling art work out of the country when they could have been smuggling people.

Cf. Reichskonkordat

Safely at my own place now I can go peek at the mangoes.

So she’s all a-flutter at how Cain has inspired her sense of awe and power by singing Broadway show tunes. I guess that’s his thing, like quoting Pokemon song lyrics, too.

When his teleprompter fails, Obama is usually rendered speechless or tongue-tied. Um….citation please? If I recall correctly, there was at least one time when he kicked some Republican ass without a teleprompter.

So she’s all a-flutter at how Cain has inspired her sense of awe and power by singing Broadway show tunes.

Those people certainly do have natural rhythm!

Thanks Pupienus. Now I want to gouge my eyes out with an icepick.

Why don’t I want to gouge somebody else’s eyes out with an ice pick? Someone who would agree with this Bishop? It’s something I just can’t figure out about myself. But it has probably saved quite a few bigots their eyeballs.

When his teleprompter fails, Obama is usually rendered speechless or tongue-tied. Um….citation please? If I recall correctly, there was at least one time when he kicked some Republican ass without a teleprompter.

“Alan! If all else fails and you think you’ve lost… pretend you’ve won! Works for our president.”
– Boston Legal, back when Bush was still in the White House

Wow, for real? All that cave-trolling but it’s a Bill Shatner quote that kills the thread?

He’s a powerful guy.
I wonder what % of your population think like fake/real Jay? Certainly, there is alot of it about on the intratubes.

Another Kiwi-

27%

I wonder what % of your population think like fake/real Jay? Certainly, there is alot of it about on the intratubes.

Well, there’s a sort of Internet legend that the number of such nuts is 27%. I think its origin is that 27% is the number that Bush’s approval ratings would never go under no matter how bad things got, and the number’s cropped up a number of times since as “percentage of people to defend a COMPLETELY indefensible position if it’s on the right side of the spectrum.”

You people really find the bottom of the mango barrel. It’s hard to believe how badly people can mangle history. It’s making me depressed, but the snark here makes it better. Might as well laugh and have an IPA.

Chris-

Close.

It’s actually based on Alan Keyes vs Barack Obama.

Or as the original author explained:

Obama vs. Alan Keyes. Keyes was from out of state, so you can eliminate any established political base; both candidates were black, so you can factor out racism; and Keyes was plainly, obviously, completely crazy. Batshit crazy. Head-trauma crazy. But 27% of the population of Illinois voted for him. They put party identification, personal prejudice, whatever ahead of rational judgement. Hell, even like 5% of Democrats voted for him. That’s crazy behaviour. I think you have to assume a 27% Crazification Factor in any population.

IIRC the 27% refers to the percent Keyes got against Obama.

Curses! beaten and with a link even. You are fast, Cerberus.

I’ve been looking an example of the 27%—they would approve of eviscerating _____ _______ (some television actor I was completely unfamiliar with and can’t remember his name (which I think is the point)) during half-time at the Super Bowl. Can’t find it, but the point is that they are crazy enough to be o.k. with ripping someone’s guts out for entertainment on television during the most widely broadcast program on American television, because it’s not them.

Whoa. That sure is one thick clot of miasma up there. Oh well, a troll who obviously only gets to use the family thesaurus one day a year is more sad than fun, anyway.

No, I did not comment* at Robin’s playground. If I had done so, I might’ve asked her to cite a credible economist who can so much as look at Cain’s 30-minutes-or-it’s-free tax plan without laughing their ass off. Or a foreign policy expert who isn’t a fully paid whore for the GOP who honestly thinks President Cain wouldn’t be even more of a diplomatic Failmeister than Bush Junior was. If anyone could actually be enough of a flaming buckethead to make those Smirky-Bush “MISS ME YET?” billboards a reality, it’s Mr. Becki-becki-becki-stan.
_________________________________

*PROTIP: Consider TEH BUTTOCKS AMPERSANDS.

Sorry for being miasmatic, Jim. I try to be funny. o.k.?

Also: ROFLMAO!

I try to be funny.

Do NOT try to be “Jay Ambrose” funny … just the bill for dry-cleaning the wetsuits alone is a FORTUNE.

That publisher sure fucked up—the pictures are like totally backward. Heh.

If I were “”Jay Ambrose” “funny”” my mate would wrap me in a warm blacket, guide me lovingly into the car, then drive me to Portland for a nice long stay on “the flight deck.”

THERES POOPY IN MY WETSUIT

ALL MY SUITS ARE WET CUZ I PEE IN THEM TOO

MY FAVORITE CARTOON CHARACTER IS PETTY POOP

It never fails. Every time there’s a wingnut post about teh Catlicks, at least one of these comes out of the woodwork.

Dougfinedry – October 19th, 2011 at 5:42 pm

I get tired of this: “the world’s largest Christian population, all 1.1 billion of us (plus another 240 million Eastern Orthodox)”
I commend Catholicism for the stand on abortion, but Catholicism isn’t Christian.

Apparently they didn’t cover New Math in the homeschooling.

Also, too: I don’t think Mittens is going to get a whole bunch of support from that lot.

Catholicism isn’t Christian.

The Baptists and other sects of Christianity really dislike the Pope.

So do most Americans Catholics, but I digress. The fact that Catholics are still affiliated with the Pope is viewed with deep suspicion amongst the far right religious nuts.

For now, they’re a useful idiot ally, but one day, they’ll eliminate them as well.

And while I would note that the sentiment of “shut up and sing” may be claimed by you liberals to be that of squashing speech, it’s truly the liberal crowd who has that covered in full, from the liberal bias in the media to the classroom to the science lab to the movie studio.

Liberals are the Jews of Liberal Fascism.

Wha?? I have no idea what that guy is actually trying to see, buy it’s simpering something. All tone. No meaning. Kind of pathetic.

Just finished “Blazing Saddles” in honor of this thread. Cleavon Little is so shiiiny. I like the chemistry between him and Wilder. Men loving men platonically—hmmm—- I like many such scenes in the “Deer Hunter.” What else? Hmmm. Surely there are more.

the liberal bias in the media to the classroom to the science lab to the movie studio.

Interesting. All areas of society traditionally populated by people of Jewish descent, come to think of it, and Jay hates the people in those areas.

Why does Jay hate the Jews?

“Just finished “Blazing Saddles” in honor of this thread. Cleavon Little is so shiiiny. I like the chemistry between him and Wilder. Men loving men platonically—hmmm—- I like many such scenes in the “Deer Hunter.” What else? Hmmm. Surely there are more.”

I believe it was Redford who said that “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” was about two guys who loved each other…..

Whoa! Nymfail! Get yer cold, dead hands off of me, Harry!

Get yer cold, dead hands off of me, Harry!

I would have thought Zombie Harry Caray was immune to Rule 34, but I’m wrong again.

Meanwhile, Schroedinger’s Dictator awaits the opening of his box. Freep already assuming Obama will take revenge if his brother in Islam does turn out to have been killed.

the liberal bias in the … science lab …

It’s because science labs are always full of retorts.

Now Cain says he has a plan to abate the regressiveness of 9-9-9, but it must remain secret:

http://thinkprogress.org/economy/2011/10/20/348655/cain-999-secret-poor/

By the by, I think the seriously deranged Robin of Berkeley is talking about my own beloved home town of Richmond, 20 inconvenient minutes away from her li’l mango plantation where, indeed, a gang banger decided to let some air into a church with his Glock. We’re famous for our atrocities! God hates Richmond, and He told me he’s not crazy about Robin of Berkeley or the Anchorite either.

Now Cain says he has a plan to abate the regressiveness of 9-9-9, but it must remain secret:

Has the “vote for me and I’ll share my secret plan with you” tactic ever worked?

Has the “vote for me and I’ll share my secret plan with you” tactic ever worked?

You’re kidding, right?

You’re kidding, right?

Well he did combine that with the whole “silent majority” BS, and as the link says, the trick was that he never used those actual words. Plus, we had lost JFK; people were very vulnerable at that point. But yeah, I get ya.

Plus, we had lost JFK; people were very vulnerable at that point.

Not only did we lose JFK, we also lost RFK, the leading antiwar candidate. The process in place at that time left us with Hubert Humphrey, LBJ’s veep, who never won one single primary and who supported the war (or was too terrified of LBJ to oppose it, which amounts to the same thing). Nixon was the only viable candiate who even remotely promised to end the war, which is why he got traction with his vague, nebulous promises and refusals to be specific.

Four years later, people were sneering about how “the hippies” took over the Democratic nominating process and came up with McGovern. Well, that happened because the process in 1968 was so spectacularly unresponsive and unrepresentative.

Now Cain says he has a plan to abate the regressiveness of 9-9-9, but it must remain secret:

I’m hoping it’s “torches.and pitchforks”

Cain also apparently has video saying that he is pro-choice, Instaputz reports.

Bye Bye, Crazybread!

Well, this pundit certainly is shocked to wake up one morning and find that Obama has once again flim-flammed and flubbed his way through another foreign policy disaster, this one of course being the capture/death of Col. Ghadafi. Whether or not you like the man- and certainly there were some protests to be made- he was what stood between Libya and outright chaos unleashed by Islamofacists, among others. And now he’s gone with a blow to the head via Obama’s preposterous foreign policy overreach, done oh-so-coincidentally right before the Republican candidates were to rightfully question his blame-America worldview. Leading from behind? Ho ho, I dare say this is failing from the front.

Yeah, it’s confusing for the poor wingnuts. Gaddafi was like Pinochet, ie a right-wing tyrant who was the USA’s ally half the time, but he was also a Muslim, so he must have been evil (and Reagan, Bush and Bush never met the man at all). And also a Democrat is president, so this needs to be spun as a bad thing. BUT IT’S A DEAD MUSLIM. But it’s a dead Pinochet. BUT

Sounds like there’s someone confused here, and it isn’t Jay Ambrose. My point was very clear. Obama, in his power-lust, has opened Pandora’s Box in Libya. Hopefully we’ll have a conservative president in time to clean up his mess.

Well, this pundit certainly is shocked to wake up one morning and find that once again Bush flim-flammed and flubbed his way through another foreign policy disaster, this one of course being the capture/death of Saddam Hussein. Whether or not you like the man- and certainly there were some protests to be made- he was what stood between Iraq and outright chaos unleashed by Islamofacists, among others. And now he’s gone with a jerk to the neck via Bush’s preposterous foreign policy overreach, done oh-so-coincidentally right before the Democratic candidates were to rightfully question his screw-America worldview. Leading from behind? Ho ho, I dare say this is failing from the front.

One thing’s for certain: this is good news for John McCain.

I am not finding anything interesting here, just nocenses 🙂

Do you liberals have anything unique to add, or is it just more of the same spin cycle of mockery?

Well, whether we do or not, one thing’s for certain: it’s good news for John McCain.

It’s because science labs are always full of retorts.

He who acetates is lost.

Do you liberals have anything unique to add, or is it just more of the same spin cycle of mockery?

Jay really does hate the Jews!

Is Jay Ambrose saying that I made a mistake in 1986 when I bombed Libya and almost killed Gaddafi?

Do you liberals have anything unique to add, or is it just more of the same spin cycle of mockery?

I was anticipating this attack. I absolutely have all sorts of unique and enlightening commentary. Stuff that will inspire epiphanies even in folks liek Fake Jay Ambrose! But I’m not sharing it yet – Imma let Jay attack on this for a while first.

Jay Ambrose in 1776:

Now you’ve done it, “Americans.” Chaos will reign!!!

Cain also apparently has video saying that he is pro-choice, Instaputz reports.

Hell, he said it on Piers Morgan last night.

Obama, in his power-lust, has opened Pandora’s Box in Libya.

What is it with conservatives and the “He be raping the white women” fears?

I do not agree with Cain’s opinion on pro-abortion, but I will say this: Once again, the diversity of ideas shows itself forth in the Republican Party. While Democrat debates in prior years were just me-too choruses of cut-and-run, soak-the-rich, and class warfare, the Republicans have shown themselves to be a vibrant and diverse group of thinkers and statesmen.

Jay Ambrose in 1776:

Now you have done it, “Americanƒ.” Chaoƒ will reign!!!

ƒixedeth that ƒor theeƒ

Do you liberals have anything unique to add, or is it just more of the same spin cycle of mockery?

…indeed, I do have something unique to add to your mother’s lips… and she can give the same old spin cycle to my cockery…

So let me get this straight: Because Cain is the flava of the moment, Jay is willing to tolerate his pro-choice stance, but the second he drops from the radar, he was just a crazy black man who ought to know his place.

she can give the same old spin cycle to my cockery…

I wonder if she cooks in a convection oven, so she can give the same ol’ spin to the crockery?

And in the washing machine, she puts the same ol’ spin on the sockery.

Say what you will, I am gonna miss Gaddafi’s fashion stylings.

Although in the last couple of debates, Michele Bachmann seems to be going the ‘crazy military dictator/James Bond villain’ sartorial route.

Herman Cain really needs to step it up, lunatic-clothing-wise.

And in Star Trek V, she gives the same ol’ spin to Sha Ka Ree

quoting Berke Breathed:

“A Statesman….is a dead politician.”

Although in the last couple of debates, Michele Bachmann seems to be going the ‘crazy military dictator/James Bond villain’ sartorial route.

I sort of envision her shaving her head and sitting with a Chinchilla cat….a la Blofeld.

And goodness knows, she’d have to blow Feld because her husband ain’t gettin’ it.

Is this the real Jay Ambrose?

or is it just more of the same spin cycle of mockery?

No, now we’re in the fluff-dry cycle of scornful indifference.

Next up is the freshness cycle of badger-filing.

Is this the real Jay Ambrose?

is there A real Jay Ambrose?

Yes truly the Republican field is rich with diversity. We have crazy innumarate god botherers who are women, crazy sex obsessed god botherers who are men, two flavors of power obsessed former CEO’s who made their fortunes by throwing thousands out of work, Hypocritical old philandering gasbags, willing to say anything for a vote, and Heartless executioners with good hair and an uncomfortably close relationship with theocratic hucksters. They are all united in a willful misunderstanding of economics and history and a selfless desire to sacrifice anything to make life better for multimillionaires.

We have crazy innumarate god botherers who are women, crazy sex obsessed god botherers who are men, two flavors of power obsessed former CEO’s who made their fortunes by throwing thousands out of work, Hypocritical old philandering gasbags, willing to say anything for a vote, and Heartless executioners with good hair and an uncomfortably close relationship with theocratic hucksters. They are all united in a willful misunderstanding of economics and history and a selfless desire to sacrifice anything to make life better for multimillionaires.

And that’s just Mitt Romney!

is there A real Jay Ambrose?

We are all Jay Ambrose in our lobsters.

or is it just more of the same spin cycle of mockery?

If there’s anywhere on the series of tubes where one would expect serious, sober discussion rather than mockery it’s a site that photoshops “pundits” on toilets.

Is Jay Ambrose still here? Doesn’t he have a job?

And he didn’t really defend Ghadafi up thread, did he?

Who the hell is Jay Ambrose?

I don’t care if Gaddafi was a week away from curing cancer, he’s been a sponsor of international terrorism for decades. He’s not someone anyone with a hope of being called a decent human being should defend.

Obama, in his power-lust, has opened Pandora’s Box in Libya.

I’d say Pandora’s Iraq box is bigger.

Wait, what?

Doesn’t he have a job?

His CV lists “Anti-Semite”…

I’d say Pandora’s Iraq box is bigger.

Iraq’d Pandora’s Box.

If there’s anywhere on the series of tubes where one would expect serious, sober discussion rather than mockery it’s a site that photoshops “pundits” on toilets.

Wait…those are photoshops, not candids?

It’s twoo! It’s twoo!

And he didn’t really defend Ghadafi up thread, did he?

*shrug*

Mussolini made the trains run on time.

It’s twoo! It’s twoo!

Wanna see my etchings?

OK, I’m confused. Where is everybody getting that Cain is pro-choice? He’s anti-choice even in cases of rape and incest.

Where is everybody getting that Cain is pro-choice?

He will allow all women the right to put pepperoni or mushroom on their fetii.

Where is everybody getting that Cain is pro-choice? He’s anti-choice even in cases of rape and incest.

He said he doesn’t think the government has any business butting into personal matters, ergo, he’s pro-choice.

He will allow all women the right to put pepperoni or mushroom on their fetii.

Does that come with Cheesy Bread? I’m kinda hungry.

He will allow all women the right to put pepperoni or mushroom on their fetii.

LOL. You’re so warped.

I approve!

VS, What do you have against Belgians? I wonder what my Brussels born butt ever did to you?

Oh, nothing. I just don’t trust ’em. Don’t trust ’em at all. Like those goddamn Spaniards. And don’t get me started on the Dutch!

OK, now I’m surprised Substance hasn’t hopped all over this one yet.

Cain just realized that the only person between he and the nomination is Romney. Therefore, in an effort to capture Romney’s supporters, he is emulating Romney’s major characteristic: The Flip-Flop. QED.

OK, I’m confused. Where is everybody getting that Cain is pro-choice?

I saw an item at Instaputz. I confess I didn’t watch the video, because, hey, it is Herman Cain.

He said he doesn’t think the government has any business butting into personal matters, ergo, he’s pro-choice.

Nuh-uh. Herman Cain is pro-life and he believes in teh sanctity of life from conception, even in cases of rape and incest. Man, you liberals must have some poor logic skills and teh inability to understand plain english. His position is very simple and straightforward.

Just because he also believes that teh decision to have an abortion is teh woman’s and gubmint has no role in deciding things like that doesn’t change his position.

Also, he believes abortions should be illegal. He clearly states this many times. But a principled conservative like Herman Cain recognizes that illegal acts aren’t forbidden or prohibited by anything other than teh law. So no biggie. Plus with his plan on reducing teh size of gubmint, it’s not liek there’ll be anyone left on payroll to prosecute.

So, to sum up:

1. Herman Cain is pro-life. He would nevar have an abortion. Even if he were raped and/or incested and/or both. Even BOTH incested and wev teh other one was.
2. Gubmint has no role in telling people what they can or can not do. If a woman is in a position to have an abortion, then it’s her decision on whether to do so or not.
3. Abortion should be illegal. In all cases.
4. Gubmint has no role in meddling and interfering in people’s lives or doing wasteful shit liek enforcing teh law.
5. ???
6. Profit.

OK, now I’m surprised Substance hasn’t hopped all over this one yet.

OK, now I’m surprised vacuumslayer is not hopping all over alicublog yet.

I just don’t trust ‘em. Don’t trust ‘em at all.

That’s how I feel about numbers.

He said he doesn’t think the government has any business butting into personal matters, then subvocalized “except when it comes to fags, ergo, he’s pro-choice.

Battle not with irrational numbers lest you become irrational.

And if you gaze into the partial differential, remember the partial differential also gazes into you.

Pi, you so irrational.

Yo i! Get real.

Enough talk about hopping all over things, you pervs.

Pi, you so irrational.

i should say so!

OK, now I’m surprised vacuumslayer is not hopping all over alicublog yet.

I’ve been lurking there a lot lately. The commentariat is sooooo funny. Maybe one day I will say something funny too.

What do you have against Belgians?

The Fat Belgian Bastards

Maybe one day I will say something funny too.

Oh, surrrrrrre! We break our asses all day to bring you the freshest funniest snark on the planet and you go and give your A game to alicublog??????

Don’t trust ‘em at all. Like those goddamn Spaniards.

+1 for teh Princess Bride reference.

I’ve been lurking there a lot lately. The commentariat is sooooo funny.

The commenting system is the pits.

hopping all over alicublog yet.

I started reading his book last night; it’s good.

And now he’s gone with a blow to the head via Obama’s preposterous foreign policy overreach, done oh-so-coincidentally right before the Republican candidates were to rightfully question his blame-America worldview.

Wait. If the killing of Ghadafi was such a foreign policy disaster, what possible advantage would Obama gain by having it done “oh-so-coincidentally” after the latest GOP moron-fest?

Also (too), how would killing a terror-supporting dictator fall under a “blame-America” world-view?

I had (and still have) trepidations regarding the U.S. involvement with Libya. That said, I remain amused by the Cirque du Soleil-level flip-flopping exhibited by the Republican candidates concerning Obama’s handling of this operation.

A skillful politician, say a Reagan or a Clinton, might smile conspiratorially and make a joke about how good my dessert looks, or flatter me by asking for a menu recommendation. He wouldn’t thank me for following his wife’s dietary pronouncements, then instruct a passing college student to study hard, then make fun of a grandson’s phone to his grandma.

Sweet Baby Jesus on a pogo stick. How can he quote what Obama said word-for-word and still get it wrong?

Obama said this to the wife’s husband:
Now, you ate all your vegetables before you had dessert

And this to the college student:
You’ve got to work hard

And this to granddaughter:
Hey grandma — boy this is an old style phone … I appreciate you

and this makes him a political Spock? Isn’t one of these the standard conservative retort to “da hippies” who “whine” about not having a job (or if they do, a crappy one)? When did eating veggies become liberal?!? How is saying you appreciate a throwback item condescending?!?!?

OK…calming down now…

That said, I remain amused by the Cirque du Soleil-level flip-flopping exhibited by the Republican candidates concerning Obama’s handling of this operation.

It has NOTHING to do with the fact that he is a Blackity-Black Democrat. NOTHING! HERMAN CAIN!

Hey! Jay? I found a website you should know about!

I read about it on a newssite.

Oh, surrrrrrre! We break our asses all day to bring you the freshest funniest snark on the planet and you go and give your A game to alicublog??????

Nobody beats S,N for me if it’s any consolation.

One of you liberals asked about Reagan earlier. I honestly shouldn’t waste my time educating liberals on the finer points of foreign policy, for their worldview is blame-America and little else, but here goes: It is because of Reagan that Ghadafi became an ally against creeping Islamofacism. He was, to put it perhaps in vulgar terms, beaten to a pulp by Reagan’s sublimely aggressive foreign policy and had no choice but to cater to our greater interests. Again, I do not support everything the man did internally, but he was a rock against the threat of a neo-Caliphate. And now that’s all gone, undone by a president who does little more than walk into the Oval Office walls. And while that image is sure to bolster some laughs, it has nevertheless led to this country being placed in increasing peril. Shame.

+1 for teh Princess Bride reference.

OK, now I’m sad because I did not realize I was doing that. Of course Princess Bride is so much a part of me, it could very well have just been an unconscious thing.

Who says it? Wallace Shawn?

The commenting system is the pits.

Me no likee either.

That’s such a cool website, actor. Why did you give it away though?

I need to find a copy of the one that looks like an official Windows warning and starts counting down how many seconds before your whole system crashes and burns.

alicublog and comments is very funny. My comment is in moderation at The Corner. Does that mean I’ll never see it?

It is because of Reagan that Ghadafi became an ally against creeping Islamofacism

Jay? Do the words “Lockerbie Scotland” ring a bell?

Idjit. Fucking idjit.

OK…calming down now…

It’s breathtakingly stupid.

BTW, has any wingnut critiqued Obama’s haughty breathing yet?

alicublog and comments is very funny. My comment is in moderation at The Corner. Does that mean I’ll never see it?

wiley, I think they let my comments stand. And I think mine showed up after moderation… We shall see.

One of you liberals asked about Reagan earlier. I honestly shouldn’t waste my time educating liberals on the finer points of foreign policy, for their worldview is blame-America and little else, but here goes: It is because of Reagan that Ghadafi became an ally against creeping Islamofacism. He was, to put it perhaps in vulgar terms, beaten to a pulp by Reagan’s sublimely aggressive foreign policy and had no choice but to cater to our greater interests.

So *that* explains the bombing of Pan Am Flight 103 over Lockerbie, Scotland in 1988.

Damn! Actor beat me to the punch.

Who says it? Wallace Shawn?

Cary Elwes. Very near teh top of teh Cliffs of Insanity.

And I am disappoint with Intartubules for not providing a readily linkable site for it – but here’s teh quote.

Would you liberals care at all to educate yourselves about foreign policy nuance? Again, I know blame-America doesn’t leave much wiggle room, but I’m astonished at your petty naivete.

foreign policy nuance

Funny you should mention that phrase.

the threat of a neo-Caliphate

I love this hilarious horseshit. There will never be another caliphate. There are no more caliphs. There is more chance of a restoration of the Czars than for a new caliph. The Muslims of the world are not a monolithic bloc. The Shiites would no more accept a Sunni Caliph than the Catholics would accept a Mormon pope. There are bunches of Muslim denominations and they don’t get along any better than Catholics and Protestants did in Ulster during the troubles.

Comments from the latest alicublog entry:

cleter
“Stiff stilted scold”? I guess this guy hasn’t met Mitt Romney yet.
Yesterday, 22:03:54
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whetstone
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whetstone
Wouldn’t surprise me if he has. When your recent choices have been Palin, Santorum, Gingrich, Cain, Paul, Bachmann, and Rick Fucking Perry, Mitt Romney must seem like a combination of James Brown and William Jennings Bryan.

Romney, and to a certain extent Cain and Paul, are recognizably human. The rest I wouldn’t turn my back on out of fear that they’d club me dead and feast on my flesh.
Today, 00:18:19
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Mrs Tilton
You shouldn’t turn your back on Romney either. He might not club and eat you. But he’s very likely to buy a venerable American people-clubbing company, fire its workers, hire offshored clubbers at a tenth of the wages, have one of them club you and then sell your corpse to the soylent green factory he also recently rightsized.
Today, 01:40:19
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cleter
“Stiff stilted scold”? I guess this guy hasn’t met Mitt Romney yet.
Yesterday, 22:03:54
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satch
whetstone
Eleanor
StringOnAStick
zencomix
3 Guests
whetstone
Wouldn’t surprise me if he has. When your recent choices have been Palin, Santorum, Gingrich, Cain, Paul, Bachmann, and Rick Fucking Perry, Mitt Romney must seem like a combination of James Brown and William Jennings Bryan.

Romney, and to a certain extent Cain and Paul, are recognizably human. The rest I wouldn’t turn my back on out of fear that they’d club me dead and feast on my flesh.
Today, 00:18:19
– Like – Reply
Liked by
John Borrego
Jason
Jaime
Mr. Wonderful
Guest
Mrs Tilton
You shouldn’t turn your back on Romney either. He might not club and eat you. But he’s very likely to buy a venerable American people-clubbing company, fire its workers, hire offshored clubbers at a tenth of the wages, have one of them club you and then sell your corpse to the soylent green factory he also recently rightsized.
Today, 01:40:19
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Uncle Kvetch
satch
Keifus
7 Guests

Mrs Tilton
You shouldn’t turn your back on Romney either. He might not club and eat you. But he’s very likely to buy a venerable American people-clubbing company, fire its workers, hire offshored clubbers at a tenth of the wages, have one of them club you and then sell your corpse to the soylent green factory he also recently rightsized.
Today, 01:40:19
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satch
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*applause, applause*

tigris said,

October 20, 2011 at 15:47 (kill)

the liberal bias in the … science lab …

It’s because science labs are always full of retorts.

Clearly we need retort reform.

Hopefully we’ll have a conservative president in time to clean up his mess.

i presume this means *bomb the shit out of them*

Clearly we need retort reform.

Don’t be too precipitate. Think about over a pipette or two.

It is because of Reagan that Ghadafi became an ally against creeping Islamofacism

Funny. That’s what Saddam Hussein did, and look at what happened when the Bushistas fired all the Baathists and let the Shia loose.

Hmmm.

It won’t compute, but I’m not talking to it anyway.

Making a hero out of Ghaddafi? Good luck with that.

i presume this means *bomb the shit out of them*

So bombs are more lethal under Republican administrations?

And jay’s bu-uying a sta-airway….
To Herman.

While Democrat debates in prior years were just me-too choruses of cut-and-run, soak-the-rich, and class warfare, the Republicans have shown themselves to be a vibrant and diverse group of thinkers and statesmen

especially mittens, who just came right out and said it…’yeah, we hired a company who hired illegals. when we found out we went to them and said you can’t hire illegals…you are fired… i can’t have any part of this…i’m running for office for pete’s sake!’

and: yes, romneycare is awesome! mandatory enrollment is an awesome republican idea! people of mass love it 3 to 1! would i make the whole country do it? NO!!! BAD IDEA!!!

at least he’s being *honest* i guess…

One good thing I can say about Reagan is he got a little real about nuclear arms control. Then he made that stupid “the bombs start dropping” joke. Fucking sclerotic son of a bitch. I was livid for weeks.

I didn’t know anyone who really liked him and I was in the military for his first two years. I knew a lot of people and most of them talked politics daily.

I’ve been lurking there a lot lately. The commentariat is sooooo funny.

A lot of ’em used to be over here. BACK WHEN IT WAS FUNNY.

Beat that, Pseudo Ambrose!

Would you liberals care at all to educate yourselves about foreign policy nuance?

Huh?

He will allow all women the right to put pepperoni or mushroom on their fetii.

Does that come with Cheesy Bread? I’m kinda hungry

most babies DO come covered in a cheesy coating…

One woman handed Obama a phone, telling him that her grandmother was on the line. “Hey grandma — boy this is an old style phone … I appreciate you.”

Called me old-fashioned — though I no longer own an “old style phone” — but I’m not greatly interested in running into politicians who might choose to critique my choice of lunch items and the order in which I eat them. A skillful politician, say a Reagan or a Clinton, might smile conspiratorially and make a joke about how good my dessert looks, or flatter me by asking for a menu recommendation. He wouldn’t thank me for following his wife’s dietary pronouncements, then instruct a passing college student to study hard, then make fun of a grandson’s phone to his grandma.

this is verra, verra telling…the quote clearly says A WOMAN handed obama a phone, telling him her grandma was on the other end…obama says, ‘hey granny! boy, this is an oldstyle phone, ha, ha, ha!’

numbnuts either a: can’t read AND comprehend or b: sees the word ‘boy’ coupled with a black person and forgets that a WOMAN handed obama the phone and then mocks obama for mocking someone who isn’t even part of the fucking story…wtf?

The Power of Herman Cain

Wasn’t that a song from a Pokemon movie?

That’s how I feel about numbers.

omg! i am with you there, sister! numbers are the devil’s pi…

And don’t get me started on the Dutch!

ahem…i believe the correct term is freaky-deaky dutch…

most babies DO come covered in a cheesy coating…

If Godfather’s markets a Cheesy Baby Brains Basket, I am totally voting Herman Cain.

If Godfather’s markets a Cheesy Baby Brains Basket, I am totally voting Herman Cain.

would you be picky on their womb of origin? i’m pretty sure we could work that into this thread somehow…

,,,i believe the correct term is freaky-deaky dutch,,,

Super-freaky Dutch.

“Nuance” is a highly important part of any debate. Except when it comes to liberal positions, where everything can be boiled down to tired stereotypes.

Super-freaky Dutch.

i’m too white to be funky…musta got that from my fazha…

“Nuance” is a highly important part of any debate.

Like the nuance of cheering for executing innocent prisoners, or letting uninsured people die.

Nuance!

Be funnier, troll!

“Nuance” is a highly important part of any debate. Except when it comes to liberal positions, where everything can be boiled down to tired stereotypes.

you might want to ‘splain that to mitt…and ‘chele…i don’t think it means what they think it does…

The projection is strong with this one.

The projection is strong with this one.

Unlike that lame-ass hologram R2D2 gave us.

Sorry, too busy fellating St. Regan’s holy corpse to be funny.

Again, that wasn’t me. I am initially unsure why liberals feel the need to resort to mockery and sockpuppets, but when I reconsider the quality of your actual ideas, I then realize how, upon coming up so short on the latter, you press on with the former.

Shit, I’d eat the devil’s pi for breakfast. I love pi, specially cherie. But numbers—-they eat me alive. Little buggers. Don’t get me started on clocks and calendars…I can live without ’em.

Again, that wasn’t me. I am initially unsure why liberals feel the need to resort to mockery and sockpuppets, but when I reconsider the quality of your actual ideas, I then realize how, upon coming up so short on the latter, you press on with the former.

are you still unaware of where you are?

Jay Ambrose said,

Again, that wasn’t me.

How can you tell?

Shit, I’d eat the devil’s pi for breakfast. I love pi, specially cherie

?
or should i say
?!

meaning, whuh?

the need to resort to mockery and sockpuppets,

This is Snark. arguments are two doors down. Go through the door marked “Tiger” and ride the moving sidewalk through the hall with the rotating knives.

Uh-oh, tsam. I think I just suggested a throat-slitting.

I hope dennis doesn’t stop by to decry my violence.

Clearly, my ideas which consist of….uh….saying how very wrong you all are with no facts and ignoring proof to the contrary with almost religious zeal over and over makes me superior!

Sorry, too busy fellating St. Regan’s holy corpse to be funny.

Donald Regan is now a saint?

I really don’t understand Catholicism.

jay may not be here right now…he is probably preparing himself for obama’s upcoming statement on his hero ghadaffi…

Ignore that imposter! I am the real fake Jay Ambrose. I made a POOPY.

Shut your piehole! That was a fake fake Jay. POOP.

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Numbers.

BTW, has any wingnut critiqued Obama’s haughty breathing yet?

Inhalation is the Jew of Liberal Respiration

From the behavior of you liberals it is clear that you are all POOPYHEADS!

Would you liberals care at all to educate yourselves about foreign policy nuance?

Nuance?

You mean like “no fly zones” or “Arab Spring”?

That nuance?

Jay Ambrose said,

October 20, 2011 at 18:28 (kill)

Your understanding of foreign policy barely even qualifies as a bad joke.

The guy who tried to create a “Great Islamic State Of The Sahel” was a bulwark AGAINST Islamic extemism? The guy who attacked Chad, Egypt & the Sudan (& sent his “Islamic Legion” paramilitary forces to places like Lebanon, Syria, Uganda & Palestine to attack opponents of Islamic groups) was a stabilizing force in the region? Basic history: YOU FAIL IT.

Reagan didn’t want MoMo to stop being a naughty boy – he wanted him DEAD, & the feeling was mutual. Yes, I’m sure Reagan killing one of his kids made him very sympathetic to American interests. That must be why in the same year he tried to replace English as the second language in Libyan schools with Russian!

Quadaffi wasn’t a “rock” against anything except unemployment for sexy female bodyguards. The guy was a totally batshit insane tyrant: did some good things for Libya but wasn’t ever going to let it become a real modern state … & was probably going to wind up starting yet another familial dynasty just like Hussein had in mind. Anyone in Haiti or North Korea who isn’t dead yet can tell you just how awesome that is.

Ask your Mom any poli-sci student who isn’t failing 101: A “neo-Caliphate” is far better served by repressive dictatorships than by democracies. Which one was Quadaffi again? Oh, yeah.

Face it, son – you just can’t stand that Obama keeps winning where the GOP chumps it.

Smokes Somali pirates – no US casualties.

Smokes Bin Laden – no US casualties.

Knocks Quadaffi out of power – no US casualties.

Maybe that means nothing to you, but a shitload of families with sons & daughters in the AF would beg to differ. Try telling THEM what a goombah Obama has been in terms of foreign policy (& YouTube that shit, For Great Justice).

But thanks for the laughs, Jay … A WINRAR IS U!

mmmmm…i am having leek & tater soup for lunch…with a nice warm ciabatta roll and butter…i am such a bad, bad diabetic…if you hear nothing from me in the next hour or so, please call the paramedics…

If Godfather’s markets a Cheesy Baby Brains Basket, I am totally voting Herman Cain.

That’s on their Value Menu. At twice market price.

you liberals it is clear that you are all POOPYHEADS!

we really are.

I am initially unsure why liberals feel the need to resort to mockery and sockpuppets

Because we’re initially unsure of why you’ve bothered to stop by a comedy blog.

Besides, homemade Cheesy Baby Brains is so much better….

The guy who tried to create a “Great Islamic State Of The Sahel” was a bulwark AGAINST Islamic extemism?

Y’know how out west they fight big forest fires by lighting l’il ones?

If Godfather’s markets a Cheesy Baby Brains Basket, I am totally voting Herman Cain.

They’ll probably end up being tasteless grease blobs that are totally inedible without dipping sauce.

mmmmm…i am having leek & tater soup for lunch…with a nice warm ciabatta roll and butter

I had Cheesy Baby Brains from CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANES Pizza

Besides, homemade Cheesy Baby Brains is so much better….

I wish Poopy was here. I bet he has some great recipes for Cheesy Baby Brains

Actor’s gone zombie?

Or just cannibal?

Besides, homemade Cheesy Baby Brains is so much better….

ho, ho! the REAL reason you stay in wisconsin and hang out at planned parenthood!

St. jim, Patron Saint Of Bitchslapping , I salute you.

Pleeease just let me feel superior to SOMETHING in my sad little life, that’s all I need… you don’t understand what it’s like to be a conservative today, despite having every single moneyed interest in this country constantly pumping lies and half-truths that support what I’ve been led to believe my whole life. The cracks are actually showing. Even in my self-perpetuated ignorance and desire to maintain the status quo I can no longer honestly ignore the complete economic wreck that the past 30 years have been, I need to feel good about something! I just can’t accept that my entire set of beliefs have been a self-perpetuated lie that exists to fleece me and my ilk my entire life. Even Fox and Rush and Brietbart can’t make the pain go away, can’t make me unrealize the fact that I have nothing but debt and nowhere to go but down despite the rich conservative fantasy I’ve held for years of pulling myself up by my bootstraps and becoming a magic overnight millionaire.

Do you know how hard it is to turn to people you’ve been bred to hate for decades and despite every urge, forced to be honest intellectually and have to say “You know what, you’re right, absolutely everything I believe in has been proven to be wrong time and time again, you were right the entire time. The entire concept of modern conservativism is a sham to keep the money coming in to the top echelons of wealth. Being a no-name loser not born into millions of wealth I have no reason to support this stupidity, and have been manipulated into doing so with the intense fervor only primal hate and fear can create. I AM A FOOL.”

Of course this is impossible. So please, just bend over and let me stroke my righty hardon imagining how I’m totally pwning you all with my massive, throbbing intellect. It’s not hard, really. Thanks guys.

why liberals feel the need to resort to mockery and sockpuppets

Because blithering idiocy does not merit serious consideration.

SEE: segregation, deregulation, IMF, Chicago School, trickle-down theory, supply-side economics, Rand, Hayek, Mises, Laffer, ad nauseam.

The world has already tried your ideas, repeatedly. They suck.

Why so scared to try what we already know works, Jay?
Afraid it’ll work again, maybe?

Wuzza-wuzzup, loony libs? Ding to the dong to the dilly dally, silly Sadlies, this new Jay joker has you clowns all in a tizzy! The funky fact of the matter is, forget this bozo, only Da Cool Coach knows how to slice n’dice your dorkus malorkus arguments to make a SPREAD of TRUTH to put on my ConservoMentum Bread, if ya feels what Da Cool Coach is rockin’ at ya, and I think ya do! Badoodle-boo-yeah!

Take that to the bank, chumps! Urban out.

Dammit. It’s only been hours and teh phrase has already been coined.

I have actually prepared and eaten cheesy baby brains. Alas, they were bovine brains. I dont know whether human baby brains would take to the same preparation.

Actor’s gone zombie?

Or just cannibal?

Hedonist.

The world ends Friday, remember?

I have actually prepared and eaten cheesy baby brains.

Fondue?

St. jim, Patron Saint Of Bitchslapping , I salute you.

According to my Ouiji board, St. jim is honoured to serve you.

*sprays Nilodor on head, moves downwind*

I am initially unsure why liberals feel the need to resort to mockery and sockpuppets

Ridicule is the only weapon which can be used against unintelligible propositions.
-Thomas Jefferson

I still want to understand why Jay Ambrose, columnist for the Jewish World Review, hates Jews so much.

Do you liberals have anything unique to add

On the third occasion, as he is ripping the trousers off the hapless hunter, the bear pauses, and asks, “You don’t really come here for the huntin’, do ya?”
.

I am a sockpuppet that has achieved self-awareness and sentience.

The guy who claims there is a threat of new Caliphate thinks that liberals don’t understand nuance in foreign policy? Here is a handy list of things that are more likely than a restored Caliphate:
A restored Romanov dynasty in Russia
A restored Stuart dynasty in England
A restored Capetian Dynasty in France
A retored Merovingian Dynasty in France
A restored Alawiyya Dynasty in Egypt
A restored Ptolomaic Dynasty in Egypt
A restored Holy Roman Empire
A restored Imperial Roman Empire
A restored Qing Dynasty in China

To restore the Caliphate, you would need a Caliph and a population of Muslims that could whip all of the other Muslims plus all of their allies put together. Which is to say, you would need World War III. And not just regular World War III, you would need Magical Rainbow Unicorn World War III where you have some elements of the human population that survive.

On the third occasion, as he is ripping the trousers off the hapless hunter, the bear* pauses, and asks, “You don’t really come here for the huntin’, do ya?”

*VBSR

Here is a handy list of things that are more likely than a restored Caliphate:

You missed “Monkeys flying out my butt”

WTF was veiled about it? Nay, that was an explicit, overt bufu reference.

It is difficult to type with my soft and pliable cloth body, but my button eyes are quite helpful in that regard.

Please imagine an Oxford comma up there, wouldja?

Please imagine an Oxford comma up there, wouldja?

I only wear loafers.

YAYS! BUTTSECKS FOR EVERYBODY!

WTF was veiled about it? Nay, that was an explicit, overt bufu reference.

I thought it was a not-so-veiled bear sex reference.

I thought it was a not-so-veiled bear sex reference.

You! Remedial Gay Sex 101!

I am a sockpuppet that has achieved self-awareness and sentience.

Which is far more than what the original Jay Ambrose ever achieved

Wow. I was wondering how to solve the stinky-stinky hair problem without getting in the bathtub or leaning over the sink. Will add nilodor to my list of handy items to have in arms reach just in case I get just a little bit lazier than I am right now.

Some days you get the bear, and some says teh bear aggressively violates your backside in a frightening yet strangely satisfying,,, uh TOTES HETEROSEXUALLY!

Wow. I was wondering how to solve the stinky-stinky hair problem without getting in the bathtub or leaning over the sink.

I just stand next to a homeless person.

FakeJay is shopworn.

A restored Romanov dynasty in Russia
A restored Stuart dynasty in England
A restored Capetian Dynasty in France
A retored Merovingian Dynasty in France
A restored Alawiyya Dynasty in Egypt
A restored Ptolomaic Dynasty in Egypt
A restored Holy Roman Empire
A restored Imperial Roman Empire
A restored Qing Dynasty in China

Don’t forget a restored Hohenzollern dynasty in Prussia and a restored Hapsburg dynasty in Austria.

ot: okay, here’s some *helpful* advice for my key clubbers that i just read in the key club mag:

Here are five laughter yoga excercise you can try:
1. Cell phone laughter: Hold an imaginary cell phone to your ear and laugh.
2. Gradient laughter: Fake a smile, giggle, then laugh slowly. Gradually increase in tempo and volume.
3. Greeting laughter: Greet everybody the way you normally do–like shaking hands–and replace words with laughter.
4. Hearty laughter: Spread your arms up, look up and laugh heartily as you direct your laughter to come straight from your heart.
5. Awkward laughter: Think of a socially awkward situation and laugh at it.

yes, i think these are all good tips for my already nerdy over-achievers…about as good as this mag’s recruitment tip of the century: go to your school’s next pep rally and take the stage to invite everyone to key club!

Strangely, this article, headlined “Tearful skin-beaters say good bye to the BumChum” is not relevant to teh buttsecks.

Someone should pay Jim to provide regular bitchslappings. He is a master.
.

bbkf said,

October 20, 2011 at 20:45

W. T. F?

,,,is not relevant to teh buttsecks.

wev, d00d. You have buttsecks your way, and I’ll experiment with bone conduction via throne mounting my,,, TOTES HETEROSEXUALLY!

I think we need a constitutional amendment to prevent the Algonquian Roundtable from overthrowing the United States government.

W. T. F?

ikr?! what high school kid wouldn’t want to try these excercises during the school day? a kid who doesn’t want to be mocked mercilessly for the rest of his days, that’s who!

Strangely, this article, headlined “Tearful skin-beaters say good bye to the BumChum” is not relevant to teh buttsecks.

for some reason, i did not snort/laff aloud until i clicked on the linky…

Someone should pay Jim to provide regular bitchslappings. He is a master.

agreed…

Wow. I was wondering how to solve the stinky-stinky hair problem without getting in the bathtub or leaning over the sink.

There’s always the razor.

Wow. You liberals really derailed this argument thread. I look forward to the next one. I hear Rick Perry has a splendid tax plan that I’m sure you will mock in your ridiculous haste.

It is because of Reagan that Ghadafi became an ally against creeping Islamofacism

What do you think convinced him to love Reagan so much, Jay? Was it when Reagan killed his little daughter?