Can Anyone Who Loves Animals This Much Really Be Crazy?


ABOVE: Audrey Hudson (left, right)

Shorter Audrey Hudson, Subhuman Events:
Democrats Seek Deportation Relief for Gay Couples

    • If we don’t deport foreign gay partners of U.S. citizens, all the Mexicans will try to stay in the country by claiming to be gay-married and the burden that this will place on immigration officials will cause the entire system to collapse and we will be overrun by brown people, all thanks to the gays and their Democrat friends.

  • ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


     

    Comments: 1045

     
     
     

    Bring it on. I for one welcome our fabulous Latino overlords.

     
     

    This backdoor approach

    i see what she did there…

     
     

    They already have procedures for rooting out fake citizenship marriages.

     
     

    They have gay marriage in AZ and TX? Why wasn’t I told?

     
     

    Shorter Audrey Hudson = Teh gheyz are gheyming the system just to try to keep families intact!!!!!!!

    Surely if it is so, then this atrocity must have sullied Audrey’s precious delicate snowflake-soul to the very quick.

    Snivelling git.

    Rewriting obsolete laws = Homogeddon?

    WINGNUT PLEASE.

     
     

    Bob Dane, spokesman for the Federation for American Immigration Reform (FAIR), said his organization doesn’t take positions on the gay agenda, but that its effect on the immigration system would be overwhelming.

    You know, it would be pretty cool if its effect was overwhelming. The best places to live in the US are all very gay-friendly. By all means let the flood of gay immigrants commence. No anchor babies!

     
     

    Corneal abrasion. Use of eyes not recommended. See you tomorrow!
    .

     
     

    Oh, her problem is that because they can’t legally marry in many states a new “domestic partnership” category has been created that could possibly be abused. The obvious solution would be to recognize gay marriages and then apply the same procedures to those marriages as any other, but because she and her colleagues can’t abide that the federales had to figure something out. IOW, lady, this new category is all about accommodating YOUR prejudice.

     
     

    I got out of the boat. I don’t know why, I know better.

    [sigh]

    While the linked article is awful, her previous one is a gem as well, in that one she blames Democrats for… wait for it… obstructionism in congress. Teh mind, it boggles.

     
     

    Always. Trust. The. Shorter.™

    all the Mexicans will try to stay in the country by claiming to be gay-married

    I just want to put it out there that I am available to marry any Messican, male or female, for citizenship purposes. Especially if he has a seester.

     
     

    While the linked article is awful, her previous one is a gem as well, in that one she blames Democrats for… wait for it… obstructionism in congress. Teh mind, it boggles.

    Well, OBS, you have to admit that if all the Democrats would just vote along with the Republicans, things would go a lot smoother.

    It seems the Blue Dog Democrats, at least, agree with her.

     
     

    Oh man, the comments threads over there are comedy gold!

     
     

    Someone’s gotta direct me to these secret meetings where The Gays and The Mexicans get together and hash all this out. Good music and good food!

     
     

    Someone’s gotta direct me to these secret meetings where The Gays and The Mexicans get together and hash all this out. Good music and good food!

    And great pot!

    I mean, ummmm, errrrr….tasteful decorations.

     
     

    The one dude says, “How can we know people are REALLY domestic partners. It’s so easy to fake.”

    Because in all of history, there has never been a case of a man and woman living at the same address who aren’t having sex. NEVER HAPPENS. It’s only if they are the same gender that it becomes easy to fake a marriage of convenience.

     
     

    So is this “up a hundred or two then down a hundred or two” thing the stock market’s been doing the last few weeks the new normal or the sign that I should learn which mushrooms and grubs are edible?

     
     

    It’s only if they are the same gender that it becomes easy to fake a marriage of convenience.

    He based his entire sociological construct on “I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry”

     
     

    The one dude says, “How can we know people are REALLY domestic partners. It’s so easy to fake.

    I bet he learned that from his wife.

     
     

    So is this “up a hundred or two then down a hundred or two” thing the stock market’s been doing the last few weeks the new normal or the sign that I should learn which mushrooms and grubs are edible?

    Personally, I’m thinking of turning to cannibalism

     
     

    It’s unfortunate that Audrey didn’t go for the trifecta full combo platter and claim that gheys + mexuhkins = mooslims

    Perhaps she’s having an off day.

     
     

    I just read that Radiohead is playing Occupy Wall St. I’m not s huge fan, but that’s pretty neat.

     
     

    I just read that Radiohead is playing Occupy Wall St. I’m not s huge fan, but that’s pretty neat.

    Sadly, no.

     
     

    I just read that Radiohead is playing Occupy Wall St.

    Tom Morello of Rage Against the Machine mentioned on Maher last week he would do that too.

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    ZOMG THEY’LL OPEN THE FLOODGATES!

     
     

    So is this “up a hundred or two then down a hundred or two” thing the stock market’s been doing the last few weeks the new normal or the sign that I should learn which mushrooms and grubs are edible?

    Helmut, I’d go with part b.

    P.S. Here’s a pic of one you can eat. (Not the butterflies, after that.)
    ~

     
     

    It’s the Luis and Ricky show!!

     
     

    So the preferred option is for the brown invading horde to have to fake straight marriages, because then there’s no way they can procreate and make more little brown invaders.

    Wait, what?

     
     

    Did oneLtwoNs hire an image consultant or something? She’s trying to look like Palin and stealing lines from Romney.

     
     

    Even worse than Mexicans, this development might lead to an epidemic of male-order brides!!1!

     
     

    Suggestion for this thread (and future ones): Ignore Dennis altogether if he shows up. Don’t bite on his bait and he will go away out of boredom. If you must, talk about him, not TO him.

     
     

    Shorter Fenwick:

    Don’t feed the trolls!

     
     

    Even worse than Mexicans, this development might lead to an epidemic of male-order brides!!1!

    I’ll be here to sell them thongs.

     
     

    I think they know how thing their own thongs.

     
     

    I think they know how thing their own thongs.

    Thongs! Thongs! You know, like thoes!

     
     

    So is this “up a hundred or two then down a hundred or two” thing the stock market’s been doing the last few weeks the new normal or the sign that I should learn which mushrooms and grubs are edible?

    All you need to know about stock market predictions.

     
    Marion in Savannah
     

    Oh man, the comments threads over there are comedy gold!

    [fingers in ears] LALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU… You will NOT tempt me with that siren song… Not. Getting. Out. Of. The. Boat.

     
     

    What’s ironic is that hispanics in general, and Mexicans in particular, are among the most homophobic demographics in the country. machismo is extremely important to Mexican males, and most would rather die than be mistaken for a gay, or worse, pretend to be one, even to secure citizenship. My wife was a restaurant manager in a place where a large percentage of kitchen workers were hispanic, and she had to be very careful not to offend the men by issuing direct orders ot them: the way to get them to cooperate was to stroke their egos and let them believe they were doing what she asked because she needed their help, as a “weak” woman. She also learned very quickly not to make comments about their masculinity or somehow imply that they were “homosexuales”–even as an obvious joke. Believe me, with very few exceptions, such men will not hesitate for an instant to forfeit their jobs, go to jail or face deportation to defend their honor against even the merest hint that their manhood is being challenged.

     
     

    Thong, thung blue.

    Wait, what were we talking about? Oh yes, crazy bigot lady worried that the federally-mandated levels of bigotry are dropping and we’ll be left with an unfillable bigotry gap that will allow fake-gay married Hispanics to overrun the country. Or something.

    I’ve griped about this before, but there are times when I DO understand why one might look at this whackadoodle shit and assume these people are paranoid schizophrenics.

     
     

    I think the strategery on the last thread was to overfeed the troll so that it would be fed so much that it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

     
     

    With my luck with women, this will be a WIN for me.

     
     

    You will NOT tempt me with that siren song… Not. Getting. Out. Of. The. Boat.

    I hardly ever get out of the boat, but today, not a thin sliver of a chance, because I Give Not One Fuck today.

     
     

    I think the strategery on the last thread was to overfeed the troll so that it would be fed so much that it would explode,,,

    Related.

     
     

    Awww fuck. Mail-order bro-des would have been bettar.

     
     

    The only immigration plan the right will accept at this point is letting right-wing death squad members into the country to kill lefties and union leaders:

    http://www.ourfuture.org/blog-entry/2011093927/republicans-cheer-labor-leaders-murdered-columbia

     
     

    So is this “up a hundred or two then down a hundred or two” thing the stock market’s been doing the last few weeks the new normal or the sign that I should learn which mushrooms and grubs are edible?

    I’m going with the theory that the folks on the inside who have made all the rules to this trading game all make money as long as the market stays active. It doesn’t matter if it is going up or going down. So I wouldn’t be surprised if they have figured out a way to keep it bouncing along and putting money in their pockets. It’s probably all illegal, but it’s unlikely anybody will go to jail.

     
     

    it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Does that really happen? Mythbusters episode!

     
     

    [fingers in ears] LALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU… You will NOT tempt me with that siren song… Not. Getting. Out. Of. The. Boat.

    Good plan, you’re not really missing anything. It’s all just “lieberals illegals acorn solyndra godlessheathens bullies REAGAN!!!” over and over and over again. They’re completely and utterly unhinged, and it’s hilarious.

    Of course it’s also terrifying that a big chunk of this country is populated by these morons and they may end up with their chosen candidate crazy person as preznit..

     
     

    I think the strategery on the last thread was to overfeed the troll so that it would be fed so much that it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Unfortunately, your basic blog-troll has a much higher tolerance for the kind of “food” you’re talking about than you do, so odds are you’ll explode first. Rather like [political incorrectness alert] initiating a drinking contest with a Russian and expecting to win. The troll is never more in his element than when the entire blog starts feeding him.

     
     

    Interesting that Audrey Hudson is the spittin’ image of her fellow anti-immigrant nutjob, Shawnda Forde, responsible for the deaths of a father and 9-year old girl.

     
     

    I thought the fear was over gay Muslim Mexican bears…

    Also, she kinda looks more like the mom from Home Alone.

     
     

    it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Does that really happen? Mythbusters episode!

    Jonah + unlimited supply of Cheetos

    No need to harm any guinea pigs. They don’t have a horse in this race.

     
     

    Rather like [political incorrectness alert] initiating a drinking contest with a Russian and expecting to win.

    I’m gonna bet on the Finnish contestants. I hear they’ve been practicing.

     
     

    Go see my flame bait in the comments!

     
     

    Nice job Tsam. side-bets on how long it will take to delete the comment?

     
     

    I’m gonna bet on the Finnish contestants. I hear they’ve been practicing.

    I’m not as think as you drunk I am!

    AND STOP SHUDGING ME! I KNOW NUFF I”VE HAD WHEN!!!

    *hic*

     
     

    it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Or a teeny tiny wafer thin mint.

     
     

    The troll is never more in his element than when the entire blog starts feeding him.

    Like a balloon and…something bad happens!

     
     

    Nice job Tsam. side-bets on how long it will take to delete the comment?

    still there…i even ‘liked’ them…

     
     

    it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    They’re all gone!

     
     

    Maybe overfeeding it was always a pipe dream.

    But with that last troll. it was certainly worth the effort to try.

     
     

    I’M TROLLING THAT MOTHERFUCKER TO PIECES

     
     

    I’M TROLLING THAT MOTHERFUCKER TO PIECES

    That’s nice dear, but be home for supper!

     
     

    Grrr.

    So, On-topic, I’m going to a wedding next weekend of a good friend of mine. She was until recently, an illegal immigrant, because our country has one of the most fucked-up immigration procedures in a nominally first world nation so it was easy to fall through the cracks and stay there.

    Hell, of the immigrants I know, at least half have been illegal owing to systemic dickery. Kids who had to wait until they were 18 to even try for green cards even though they entered the country when they were 3, the government losing the paperwork and then trying to argue that the only way to continue was to go back to the country of origin and try again, accepting them into American schools and then denying visas to attend them, and of course, being a member of any country that we have a quota system against (especially China).

    So yeah, now that she’s getting porked by a man and getting married (which I’m happy for her, he seems like a great guy and they really complement each other really well), she’s finally got her piece of legal paper and can stop working in back kitchens for slave wages with employers who were always one step away from going “join us in the bedroom or I’m reporting you to INS.”

    She’s bisexual so if she had fallen in love with a woman she would have continued to have been fucked. And yeah, the interview process was shitty, invasive, disbelieving and dehumanizing, but there was still a time when things were really bad that I thought of fake marrying her, just so she could escape her situation.

    But see, the problem wasn’t the laws. It was that we just don’t have a good means for people to appeal, retry, or sometimes apply in the first place for citizenship. And that’s because there are a number of industries that are counting on the broken immigration process to get away with abusive and illegal business practices (agriculture, gardening, maids for rich people, sex trafficking, etc…).

    And yeah to everyone who noted that opening to gay marriages wouldn’t stop sham straight marriages, but the way to stop all sham marriages is to make it so those who want to come to this country don’t have one single option of becoming a citizen when the system inevitably fucks you over. Who’s going to bother trying to cover for their roommate so INS does’t kick them out, if the other person can just reapply without worrying about being thrown out of the country?

    But then, the real point is basically just harassing the filthy brown foreigners. Making them understand that even if they make it into this country, they’ll never be accepted as “Americans”. Just like the real reason for deporting gay married couples is to send a message that even if the state grants them equality, they will never be seen as equal to “proper relationships” and all that protection of the relationship means nothing to those who see it as inherently worthless.

    It’s about gleefully using systemic oppression to “send a message” while being able to pretend you have clean hands.

    No, I would never, but we just can’t change the system right now, it would be abused, mm hmm, I’m just really concerned about that, oh hey, could you turn a little to the left, I can’t quite see the full on shot of your pain. Oh yeah, that’s it, that’s doing it for me.

     
     

    I think the strategery on the last thread was to overfeed the troll so that it would be fed so much that it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Never wrestle with a hog. You’ll both get dirty but the hog loves it.

     
     

    Also never have sex with a sheep. It’ll be dirty for the both of you. So so dirty and…what was I saying?

     
     

    Also never pick the scabs off of genital sores.

     
     

    Also never pick the scabs off of genital sores.

    How do you know Dennis has scabs?

     
     

    it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Not a myth: I explode when given almost any amount of lettuce. System has no resistance to fiber.

    Not even Canada is safe!!

     
     

    it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Not a myth:

    M Bouffant is a guinea pig?

     
     

    Also, I’ll just note how this argument, like many other wingnut arguments, only fucking works if you a) erase all human suffering in place of only weighing the possibility of the potential of abuse and more importantly b) view minority groups as literally inhuman or subhuman creatures instead of people.

    I mean, let’s just look at this. It only really works if you view gays and mexicans as inhuman monsters that just bring bad things into something simply by being connected to it in some tangential way and bring pain simply by existing as demons in our plane of existence.

    Like her worst case situation. So Jorge pretends he’s in love with his roommate George so that he can finally be a citizen after years of trying. This harms…who, exactly? So Jorge is now legally married to someone he doesn’t really love and this picks the pocket and takes the food off the table of conservatives…how? I mean, I get how it hurts Jorge. He is legally bound to someone he doesn’t really have that connection with and will be unable to legally protect any romantic relationships down the line for a good long while. Plus, he’ll have INS assholes all up in his business trying to see how well he comports with romantic comedy cliches (seriously, my friend who’s getting married has been getting raked over the coals about how perfectly stereotypically heterosexual she is and who she comports to stereotypes of relationships not seen outside of Hollywood. The INS interviews made ME angry and I wasn’t even there for them).

    So, his life might be impacted and so may George’s for helping him out, but how does this affect anyone else in any real way? I mean, to even halfway argue that you’d have to claim he’s taking “jobs and benefits” away from white people, which you know, assumes that any money going to help a brown person survive is inherently wasted. But the conservatives have regularly demonstrated that they believe that illegal immigrants are getting those already. So him becoming legal in that horrifying way hurts no one except the person in question and actually helps INS, because now he has a record and a reason to remain on the grid if shit goes down (contrary to popular belief its better if “terrorists” get student visas rather than just show up illegally, because then they can be more easily tracked down and their actions more easily monitored allowing us to prevent incidents when we bother to read memos like “Bin-Laden determined to strike in the USA”).

    So yeah, the “crime” isn’t anything. But to the wingnut, that this possibility exists now erases the real life heartbreak and suffering of people who have created families and fallen in love, being ripped from their homes, sent back to countries they have few to no connections in, sometimes even hostile countries that mean them harm, far away from their closest loved ones and children. All of that is meaningless because someone could pretend to be gay in a way that harms none and just makes their life rougher.

    Which of course, this suffering is only ignorable when you view the people as so meaninglessly inhuman that literally discounting their suffering to make a meaningless idiotic “ideological point” about purity of systems at all makes sense. I mean, it’s not like real people are getting hurt by this, like a white person committing medicare fraud having their check arrive late or something.

    Also, note how the purity of systems is only important when it promises to fuck minorities.

    No one’s going, “well, it’s apparent that companies have abused the stock market with illegal actions designed to short sell, I guess we’ll have to ban the stock market forever” or “some banks have performed actions that have tanked the world economy and still have the ability to do so, I guess, we’ll just have to nationalize all the banks.”

    And these are things with real harm, real extra-legality, and real compelling reasons for shutting down the systems, but now, only whether or not we treat people with respect and allow them a means to survive this cruel world, do we start going apeshit over whether or not a wingnut can imagine a way that someone could break the system if they were willing to live a thoroughly unpleasant and unfulfilling life and arguing that that means another round of making suffering worse.

    It’s almost like the suffering of minorities is the point. But that’s impossible. There has never at all been a historic case for that in this country.

     
     

    M Bouffant is a guinea pig?

    Ignoring the troll.

     
     

    Substance McGravitas said,

    September 30, 2011 at 23:21 (kill)

    Also never have sex with a sheep. It’ll be dirty for the both of you. So so dirty and…what was I saying?

    tsam said,

    September 30, 2011 at 23:23 (kill)

    Also never pick the scabs off of genital sores.

    pertinent

     
     

    Eight hours of voting left!

    Glad to see 13 entrants over $100… this morning, it was just six.

    Still betting my buddy, LarryElvis, is the cover beefcake. 🙂
    .

     
     

    How do you know Dennis has scabs?

    I fucked him. Now I got sores.

     
     

    Okay, that all out of my system, let’s dive for mangos. Oh god, this isn’t water, it’s the blood of kittens who have been skullfucked to death. That’s not how you love animals, you sick crazy fuck!

    Wow, okay, so the entire first section is basically just pointing out that this is happening and it would be good for gay families and she doesn’t even bother to “scare quote” that, probably because she trusts her audience to already inherently see anything to do with the gays being happy as a bad thing that is signalling the invasion of demons.

    Bob Dane, spokesman for the Federation for American Immigration Reform (FAIR), said his organization doesn’t take positions on the gay agenda, but that its effect on the immigration system would be overwhelming.

    Wow, that sounds important, like an important immigration rights spokesperson doesn’t even agree with the bill.

    So who is this Bob Dane fellow?

    Oh my, a clownhall white supremacist.

    Wait, a minute, who is FAIR again?

    Ohhhhh, they are the Pregnancy Crisis Center of the immigration world. One of those conservative think tank organizations that prop up simply to recycle right-wing talking points under the guise of a “fair and balanced” “non-biased” perspective that is intentionally designed to be confused with older, more successful rights groups actually trying to handle key issues in our society. My guess is the specific groups they are trying to be confused with are CAIR and FIRM.

    So, yeah, off to a good start already turning to this as if it was a reasoned analysis of impact on immigration. I’m betting if you asked FAIR if an immigrant being given a hot dog was all right, they would be “concerned about its impact on an already chaotic immigration process”.

    So where are you going with this?

    “This allows domestic partners another category that could be abused. Partnership is an easy claim, but almost impossible for the government to prove. How can you verify that someone is in an intimate relationship with the goal of a life-long commitment?” Dane said.

    The…same way you do now? Gay people don’t really have a “different” way of expressing love and a desire for long-term commitment. I mean, I personally think the current system is cruel, invasive, and mean-spirited and that there should be better options than having to marry an American to get citizenship in this country, I mean think about people who don’t fall in love but could provide great services and create good businesses if we just let them. But still, if all things were the same and we just let gays in (and it’s not even about marriage, it’s about the already existing domestic partnership laws actually being treated as something more than motherfucking toilet paper by the INS), then you “investigate” them the same way and confirm they love each other like you do with every other couple.

    Actually, given that the interviews seemed to fixate more on gender stereotypes than proof of intimacy, maybe that really is the problem. Having to get up and rewrite the questions instead of making sure the woman knows her place is in the kitchen and the man is wearing the pants in the relationship and making sure that there is no signs of bisexuality that could be deception in disguise. Filthy bisexuals, infiltrating our marital unions!

    Also, I love the whole, this is totally new and unprecedented angle. Yeah, domestic partnerships, yes, that is such a novel and not at all decade old concept with a large body of legal precedence. How ever will the INS handle such a new creation and its obvious means of being abused? Why it’s so obvious that despite the issue simply being one of enforcement of existing situations, the esteemed douchebag can’t even come up with a single example of any of this fraud actually happen.

    It only matters that it could potentially happen. Like how I had to declare the air above my apartment a no-fly zone because I could potentially be kidnapped by a rogue balloon and be stranded in a tiny zone directly above my house.

    “At the end of the day,” said Dane, “it’s an additional burden on an immigration system that is already maxed out,” Dane said.

    They’d have to like, pick up their pencils, maybe even read a pamphlet or two on not addressing applicants as “you filthy godless faggot who is ruining America”, I mean GAWD, do you know how much of a hassle that would be?

    And yeah, it is amazing that the new conservative attack vector is “We can’t do anything” and by anything they don’t mean sweeping legislation and ambitious projects, but literally anything. A minor update to ensure enforcement and recognition of existing legal statuses, one of the easiest tasks of any governmental body is even too much work to demand on our poor beleagured system.

    I mean, why do we even get out of bed in the morning, it’s all so futile. Or go to work? I mean, they are just going to give us assignments and ask us to do things and that’s already going to be overstressing an already stressed system. Better to just roll over the hobo for spare change before calling up daddy for an extra mil.

     
     

    HEY CERBERUS

    How about a little love for you boy who is torching the comment section?

     
     

    I explode when given almost any amount of lettuce.

    Is Homeland Security aware of this new threat?

     
     

    it would explode, rather like a guinea pig that’s given too much lettuce.

    Oh god, so you were at my sixth birthday party, too?

    Mom, is that you?

     
     

    Oh, from the Bob Dane link I found we get even better mangos as to exactly the type of company she finds “critical” in understanding this issue:

    In the wake of Arizona’s new laws, the illegal alien special interests are working overtime making their last ditch pitch for amnesty before mid-terms elections, robotically reciting how they want to “fix” our immigration problems:

    Yeah, I really don’t need to add anything to that. It’s rather perfect in its encapsulation. You really have it all. “Illegal alien special interests” which is like a dog-whistle orgy, arguing that legal citizens demanding to be treated like human beings is “a demand for amnesty” thus revealing that term as nothing other than the racist dog-whistle that it is, scare quotes over “fix”, because how could anything government be fixed, it can only be concern trolled about, and of course supporting the Arizona law which is always one of those things for determining whether or not you keep a pointed hood in the closet.

    Mwa, bellisima. This truly was a work of such appalling beauty that I can do naught but applaud.

    He then goes on to quote the actual immigration rights people and claim that all they have is wordplay and dog-whistles, oh my, this is grade A projection right here. Vintage stuff.

    Fix A Broken System: When they say the system is broken they actually mean illegal aliens face deportation, and that America is not admitting enough legal immigrants fast enough.

    Hmm, let’s say you have a system designed to process through legal access to something, say a ticketing system for a museum, but you fuck it up so badly with layers of bureaucracy and fuck up so thick that you have a number of non-paying customers roaming the exhibits afraid to ever leave for fear of punishment or never being let back in and a number of people who really want to pay being prevented from paying because they didn’t pay at the right counter and there’s no way to pay from inside and demonstrate willingness and desire to support the museum. Would you say that ticketing system was working just fine or would you say it’s a “broken system” that needs fixing?

    And yeah, bonus points on the cognitive dissonance projection that it must have taken to write that. Conservatives are all about ranting about how the “immigration system” is broken, in the sense of why are there all these illegals running around, including these really crafty illegals who claim to have been American citizens longer than their family has ever been here. So yeah, the system is fine, except for all these illegals who want to be legal and saying that is bad.

    And yeah, he doesn’t really even have an argument out of that one.

    The fact is illegal aliens aren’t supposed to be in the United States – by definition they do not have legal status.

    Which means they aren’t even legally people!

    That’s how it works, right? If you are illegally in a location, they are allowed to shoot you and mount your head on the wall or strip you of all legal rights and protections of that location as if you were an invading animal?

    Cause if not, I need someone to help me bury some bodies.

    The bottom line is that the only thing broken about our immigration system is an unwillingness to impose sensible limitations and enforce the laws. Truth in labeling might suggest that their version of “fixing a broken system” should be read as “making a broken system worse.”

    And how would that work? That “making a broken system worse” bit? Hello? Also, wasn’t the previous paragraph all about “it’s not really a broken system, there’s just too damn many brown people around”? Ah, wingnut arguments, where even last sentence is too long ago to remember. Also, love the shorter this bit demands:

    The real problem is that we can’t ban all the brown ones from coming and only let in the white ones, and not the bad white ones with ideas about socialism and liberal values, but the good ones who are super religious and vote Republican.

    Seriously, though, this island is where the real mangos are. I’m going to scoop up some more before I come back.

     
     

    tsam-

    I’m a maniac! A maniac on the… metaphorical boat stranded on the harbor of some nutjob’s desperate propaganda attempt, a nutjob who probably makes more in a month than I will see in the next 10 years… I need to re-evaluate my life choices…

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    I knew a guy from Nederlands who overstayed his student visa. He was trying to get a green card by sham marrying an agreeable lady friend. As they didnt live together, the ICE people wanted to see pictures of them on dates or whatever, records of some sort like receipts for dinner dates, yada yada. They also said something about checking up on them every few months and if warranted revoking his green card. I don’t know if they were giving him a line of shit but he decided in the end to go back to Europe.

     
     

    Now, Take it away Bob Dane and your crazy crazy 2010 mangos:

    Path to Citizenship: Euphemisms for amnesty wear thin quickly so the new phrase “path to citizenship” has entered the lexicon. We already have a “path to citizenship” and it starts with applying for a green card and getting in line.

    You’re scared of amnesty, right? We’ve made it sound like “reparations” and we use it in the same way as all-purpose dog-whistle. Black mother trying to scramble enough money to try and treat her breast cancer so she doesn’t leave her children motherless? “Reparations.” Someone just trying to become citizen of this country legally rather than having to go into the instant rejection pile because he comes from a “bad country” like Mexico or China? “Amnesty.”

    It’s so simple a child could do it. Oh HAI there, Bob.

    Also, love how these fuckers don’t remember what they are pretending they are fighting for. Psst, Bob, you were just ranting about how illegal immigration was bad, why are you openly promoting policies that would encourage illegal immigration and discourage legal immigration? Why it’s almost like this is all about white supremacy and trying to fend off the incoming “demographic winter”. I know! Heaven, forfend!

    Go to the Back of the Line: To most people, going to the back of the line would mean returning home, filling out the necessary forms, and then waiting for a reply.

    Really? So when you go to the DMV and try to cut in line because as you say “Don’t you know who I am, my time is important and I have places to be” and they say “go to the back of the line”, you know that means that you go back to your house, call the DMV to ask what forms you can fill out to make an appointment, wait 2-5 years for a reply and if it’s a negative or they lose one of the 100 forms, never go to the DMV again, because one rejection equals all rejections in our current model of handling immigration.

    Cause, I believe most people handle it by going back into the line in front of the counter and impatiently tapping your foot until they open more windows. Well, that’s most people, you and your conservative breathern tend to throw dramatic temper tantrums and demand that the DMV be abolished and privatized because “IT TOOK TIME OUT OF MY BUSY DAY!”

    Also, yes, they can return “home” to a location that their family often doesn’t live in, where they have no real connection or support network and a possible permanent disconnect from their actual support network and family if they can’t get back in. And also a location that might very well be openly hostile to them and to which they have little to no cultural connection.

    I know of quite a number of “illegals” especially from asian countries (and seriously asian-americans, make some noise on this bullshit, all this “model minority” crap is patronizing horseshit and you know it) who have been here in this country since they were children or whose entire family is either here or in Canada. Going “home” would be like shipping someone penniless to Siberia and saying “good luck, oh by the way, if you want to come back home, send us a letter, fill out a bunch of forms and we’ll get back to you in 3-5 years.”

    Also, that whole they don’t let you back into the country once they say no once. Part of that whole “broken system” you were objecting to a second ago. If something goes wrong, you are much better remaining here and illegal and looking to bone someone or fake bone someone to stay than “going back and starting from scratch” unless you have one hell of a desire to try living in that country permanently instead.

    What amnesty advocates mean by going to the back of the line is that we create a brand new line for those who have broken the law right here in this country.

    Isn’t it amazing that when you declare something stupid a law then those who transgress the stupid become “law-breakers”? And isn’t it great for demagogues that declaring such allows them to conjure the image of the irredeemably criminal, the guaranteed recidivist and the violently deranged? Why it removes all the need to see one’s victims as human at all. Merely a strain of diseased animal trying to fuck your daughter and kill your wife.

    Also, “Bob”, anyone who has decided to cross the street on an empty road because no cars are coming or connected automatically to a neighbor’s unsecured wi-fi because your computer searches for it automatically, or bet with friends on the game, or decided to go 67 on the highway because 65 is just so slow is also someone who has “broken laws right here in this country”.

    Somehow I suspect that you are not going to be suggesting we start deporting and harassing those who commit parking violations anytime soon.

     
     

    Ignoring the troll.

    …says the man who posted pictures of shit at my blog.

     
     

    I fucked him. Now I got sores.

    well, no WONDER you want to slit his throat. Carry on.

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    I was going to post a comment but I don’t want to register. My comment was to be a reply to one which tsam had already replied to. My comment: Homosexual behavior has been observed in hundreds of species. Homophobia occurs in only one species. What do you want to call “natural” now?

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    It is amazing how they have redefined “amnesty.”. What about paying a fine, doing time (in the military or whatever) and other obligations is amnesty?

     
     

    Actually, to clarify, Boouffant posted VIDEO of shit at my blog.

    He fucked up the html, though; I fucked up by correcting it.

    Then I got tired of it, and deleted his post; it made WordPress go pear shaped and all the comments in that post started showing up in the middle of the comment list.

    I had to cut the hearts out of seventeen Wisconsin Republicans and burn them on an altar to correct the issue. Do you KNOW how many Republicans you have to flay to find seventeen hearts?

     
     

    Also never have sex with a sheep. It’ll be dirty for the both of you. So so dirty and…what was I saying?

    Wait a minute: I thought there were only New Zealanders who post here.

     
     

    Exactly, Pup.

    Amnesty is what Nixon received.

     
     

    ually, to clarify, Boouffant posted VIDEO of shit at my blog.

    He fucked up the html, though; I fucked up by correcting it.

    Then I got tired of it, and deleted his post; it made WordPress go pear shaped and all the comments in that post started showing up in the middle of the comment list.

    Good times.

     
     

    MOAR MANGOS from Honest Bob Dane, sociopath and supremacist.

    Also he looks like this.

    Get Right with the Law: This phrase suggests that administratively converting 13 million people from illegal status to legal status “gets them right with the law.”

    Yeah, why would we want to discourage law-breaking and making it possible for someone committing illegal actions to go straight and narrow. It’s almost like you somehow think the justice system is supposed to be about reformation instead of just an extended psychodrama wherein we show how manly we are.

    Which is just ludicrous. Wanting criminals to have a way to become non-criminals, it’s almost like you think that crime isn’t an in-born trait simply inherent to the brown beasts that dare corrupt our fair white nation. Pshaw.

    Accommodating law-breaking by simply rewriting the rules to fit the circumstances is one of the most insidious aspects of amnesty.

    If our laws are bad, we will simply leave them as they are. So as not to surrender in our pose-off against crime. As long as it is still illegal to not dismantle your motor vehicle on the side of the road when a horse passes by, we can prevent the criminal hordes from murdering us in our beds. For enforcing means by which the everyday becomes criminal is the best way to discourage additional criminal activity.

    (Hint, again the point is that they view criminality as more an inherent trait of “the criminal class” rather than specific actions. This is also why white-collar crime is never a crime, because those actions are not undergone by the “criminal class” and instead by good people and good people are simply incapable of criminality because they weren’t born with the trait.)

    Undocumented Workers: Given the huge sums of money the special interests have, one would assume their high-paid consultants would have told them that this euphemism expired years ago.

    Maybe cause it’s not intended as a euphemism, because everyone isn’t like you, trying to find the best term to stick it to the “other side” and win politics like a fucking game?

    We all know it means illegal aliens, but amnesty advocates believe that using the adjective “undocumented” magically erases the illegality, while claiming they are “workers” suggests all are gainfully employed, which they’re often not.

    Oh yes, a term with so much legal history to it, no wait, no, okay, maybe it’s more accurate, no it conjures more an image of the Predator than people trying to do a shit job in a country that hates and fears them, hey, maybe mutants. That way the right still gets to demonize and dehumanize them and the immigrants themselves can pretend they belong to a secret society of superheroes or when whitey gets uppity, supervillains.

    And ah, the worker line. He doesn’t even need to say the inaccurate, he knows his audience will go there, he doesn’t need to spell it out. He never actually said that lazy illegals are living fat off the state while you work a job you hate for too low a wage, so it’d be wrong to say he did. But you know, wink wink, nudge nudge. Not all of them are employed, if you know what I mean, just saying. I mean, for fuck’s sake, if you’re going to be this unapologetically racist, just come right out and say it. You’re on clownhall for fuck’s sake. It’s not like our opinion of you is going to drop.

    He then comes up with some bullshit about how illegal alien is totally the right term because “they break a law” and alien is a term defined in a legal brief, please ignore that it’s falling out of favor in the same way that courts don’t refer to the “negro in question” anymore.

    He then says that they’ll be in good company for using it and since he’s used it as nothing but foghorn dog-whistle in his essay and he’s writing on fucking CLOWNHALL, I’m guessing the “good” in good company is also a euphemism.

    Orderly Flow of Workers: This is a phrase that by its own definition assumes we actually need more workers. It refers to our foreign guest worker program.

    Go away, we don’t want your kind. Huah, showed those punks.

    Except…

    Ignoring that given our service economy, the more people earning a living wage is always a good thing in upping demand and keeping everyone supported, which is why functional first world nations have a guaranteed minimum wage even if all you do is sit on your ass and eat bon-bons.

    Well, there is the fact that so far he’s mostly been cheering that already existing totally not “broken” system we have now. So, it’s not “Takin’ AWR JAHBS” so much as they are currently taking up employment space that is unprotected by the legal minimum wage and the protections that that guarantees. As such people are being priced out of markets and those engaging in illegal hiring are able to undercut groups with unions and which value full regulation compliance. So we have people making less than minimum wage dragging down prices and having to live in fear. Letting those people have a means to become legal allows us to fix this imbalance again and ensure everyone is making a living wage and not being undercut.

    Also, the illegals tried to have you take their jobs back, you refused. Balls in your court, douchebags. You want to work in the hot sun without water for 12-14 hours for sub-minimum wage? No. Yeah, no one does, and if you let us fix the system, no one will have to and they’ll have to price it reasonably in order to attract applicants.

    So yeah, legal workers means legal protections, means a hell of a lot more economic gain than if we continue to make it impossible for those inside the country to become legal.

    But yeah, it goes where you think, straight up “THEY TOOK UR JAHWBS” territory.

    No, republicans took your jobs and if they didn’t hire immigrants, they straight up send the company to another country where they can exploit people better. You want to fix it, you’ll actually have to let us fix the economy and you don’t want to do that even more than you don’t want us to treat brown people as anything less than inherently criminal.

     
     

    Pup Max-

    It is amazing how they have redefined “amnesty.”. What about paying a fine, doing time (in the military or whatever) and other obligations is amnesty?

    Yeah, and it’s the old definition usually based on times Republicans got away with impropriety that they are using for the emotional resonance. The cry really is “brown people are getting away with things! You’re not allowed to get away with things! Why should they be allowed to get away with it, where it is ill-defined but definitely a crime. You’re not allowed to shoot latinos without going to jail and latinos are allowed to live here and get a ‘good deal’, does that seem fair?”

    But yeah, creating a system wherein people can apply for citizenship without having to face criminal charges or being separated from their families aids us all. Especially since it will let us keep track of all the people who de facto live here, which cannot be stressed enough in its usefulness in determining a shit-ton of important aspects about our society.

    Also, I love how they can’t exactly what is so “wrong” about living in the country illegally. It’s one of those crimes with so absent an impact on other people that the wingnuts are stuck just ranting about how it’s just “illegal” rather than why it’s illegal. And absent the “yeah, brown people are icky, thus that sounds more meaningful than it is” institutional racism effect, this really is a stronger argument for changing the law than enforcing it more strenuously.

    It’d be like if they demanded constant SWAT patrols and mile high fences looking for jaywalkers or children who walk across golf courses on the way to school because “THEY ARE BREAKING THE LAW!” We’d look at that person like they were insane, but since the perceived impacted are brown and foreign, the argument suddenly seems to make sense.

    Why, yes, they are breaking the poorly designed law they are begging for a chance not to break and which fucks them over more than any other group, why we must come down on them like a ton of bricks!

     
     

    Plus, I wonder I who the wingtards think will do our hardest, shit-for-pay jobs if the Mexicans don’t keep coming over.

     
     

    Also never have sex with a sheep

    Not when you can have sex with an affectionate, attractive sea cucumber that’s sensitive to your needs.

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     
     

    Wait a minute: I thought there were only New Zealanders who post here.

    This makes more sense with a “two” in there.

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    Aaah, screw you vs. And not in the good way either! Eeeww.

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    This makes more sense with a “two” in there.

    Depends on where it is.

     
     

    Which yeah, last mangos:

    Secure the Border: They save the biggest and boldest claim for last. Amnesty advocates promise to secure the border for no other reason than to make their plans for massive amnesty more palatable.

    How dare they actually agree to our bullshit demands. Don’t they know that’s not actually what we are upset about and that’s more a sop to the rubes. And don’t you dare point out that it’s easier to defend one’s borders if there isn’t a large immigrant population that is having to keep quiet in fear of being deported and thus more likely to notice say other illegal trafficking and call it out.

    Imagine a world where immigrants were calling out drug shipments they noticed or gun shipments or where sex trafficked workers could trust in receiving a visa into the US if they rat out the child pimping bastards that tricked them into the country? Or where the INS wasn’t stuck chasing after random students and instead could keep and eye out for legitimately dangerous individuals trying to sneak into the country?

    Oh wait, that would be a terrible world for conservatives. Without terrorist threats to stoke fear, drugs to celebrate with, and child prostitutes to abuse and murder, how ever will a conservative get a hard-on again? No wonder they are emphatically against sane solutions.

    So do we have some final mangos for the road?

    There is immigration enforcement and then there is amnesty. One has nothing to do with the other.

    Well, yeah, when you turn it into a dog-whistle and when by “immigration enforcement” you mean “our system is fine except I want to kill more darkies legally” then yeah, they don’t have anything to do with each other or reality. But so glad you’ve been given a prominent seat at the table over the thousands of legitimately suffering people who just want the chance to be better citizens than you.

    Revealing the motives of the illegal alien lobby is an ongoing responsibility because as Burke said, “a very great part of the mischiefs that vex this world arise from words.”

    And we end with a Burke quote. The purse-dog of the “intellectual” conservative. Why not? A meaningless fart in the air of history, a man whose ideas didn’t comport to his own time, much less modern day, a perfect distillation of everything modern conservatism is. Meaningless, out of date, and abusive to the very notion of words and politics as anything more than frivolous sport.

    All right, I’m out. You know what, fuck it, I’m not swimming through that, I’m stealing his speedboat. WHEEEE! Yeah, how do you like your inherent criminality now?!? Hey, what’s that sniffling noise. Hey, there’s like 12 underaged hookers tied up in the hold with a kilo of heroin. You sly bastard.

    You win this time Bob Dane!

     
     

    I was all for deporting illegal aliens, until I found out they weren’t talking about the Reptilians.

     
     

    Aaah, screw you vs. And not in the good way either! Eeeww.

    Sorry ’bout dem girl parts, Pup.

     
     

    Please send pertinent details about screwing in the bad way.

     
     

    Oh wait, one stop back at Isle De La Hudson to see what type of tigers are in the jungle:

    What does being gay and being an Illegal in this country have to do with anything but establishing a gay country which this country is not. If they are here illegally send them back to where ever they came from even if they are kin to Obama, he is not above the law as he believes and should be tried for crimes against this country, prosecuted and deported like every other illegal here, if you are in this country illegally you are a criminal and should be treated like a spy the way other countries would treat you.

    !

    Uh…

    (Start up motor and drive back to boat after a short detour to set the hookers up with some OTHER ILLEGAL people living ILLEGAL and being ILLEGAL)

    I got nothing.

    (Oh, one more thing on the whole illegal bullshit. They aren’t illegal fucking people. It’s not illegal for them to survive. Their immigration status isn’t in order and it’s illegal in the same way as it’s illegal to meet with a bunch of your friends at a park without a permit, but they are still sanctioned a metric shit-ton of rights simply by being human beings. It’s amazing…no wait, wrong word, entirely predictable that this goes through so many people as the people themselves are illegal in some inherent and horrifying way. It’s almost like it’s about finding a means to dehumanize, enslave, and demonize brown foreign people as has never before been seen in this country, ever, and besides it was in the past and we’re better now.)

     
     

    Not when you can have sex with an affectionate, attractive sea cucumber that’s sensitive to your needs.

    I wonder if one of those has been found in a rectum yet.

    That’s kind of a weird thing to wonder about.

     
     

    I wonder if one of those has been found in a rectum yet.

    Hmm, I have a new Magic 8-Ball idea.

     
     

    Not to mention that the wingnuts really really don’t want to get into a serious debate on the issues of “legality” as it applies to countries, because the thing about nations is they play a lot of fast and loose games with things like that and trust the other nations to back them up on that lest those nations have to fess up to their histories in an uncomfortable way.

    But yeah, if they really want to go full tilt, no exception on this shit, then we’re pretty much calling for the deportation of near everyone outside the native-Americans and the cessation of every major treaty and law the US has ever passed. Because we kinda just came in, set up shop, stole the land and then came up a bunch of bullshit to say we could enforce it and limit how others could come in and do that and the only way we really get away with that is a lot of other countries do it and want the right to harass their immigrant populations and so don’t make much noise.

    But yeah, whitey ain’t exactly legal and the older back the family, the less likely they have a story of their ancestor coming her half as legally as the current crop of “illegal immigrants” do.

    And that’s before we even get into the bullshit that we did to Mexico in the very territories that we’re now bitching about having an “illegal immigrant” problem in. Yeah, the latin@s aren’t exactly the ones most likely to be the ones really benefitting from illegal invasion there, gringo.

     
     

    Hmm, I have a new Magic 8-Ball idea.

    Oh jesus.

    Giving you ideas is a wonderful and frightening thing.

     
     

    One more tiger from people so crazy they actually read Human Events:

    Dale, why should sexual perverts be given status equal to that of normal people? They’ve got a serious mental disorder that needs counseling and treatment but if they’re illegals, I don’t want that happening on my dime.

    It’s like a trainwreck of consciousness and I can’t stop looking away. Tell my same-sex partner I’m only allowed to get into a legally-recognized marital institution with because of a loop hole that I love her!

     
     

    Also, tsam, I saw your posts over there, what was your opinion of the half-thinking monstrosities you saw in those jungles?

     
     

    Hey vs, I’ve always wondered: is it slays-with-a-vacuum or is it slayer-of-vaccums?

     
     

    Dale, why should sexual perverts be given status equal to that of normal people? They’ve got a serious mental disorder that needs counseling and treatment but if they’re illegals, I don’t want that happening on my dime.

    EEEEEEHHHHH. There’s a whole lot that’s wrong with that statement. First of all, being homosexual has nothing to do with being perverted. Second of all, being perverted, unless your perversions involve children or animals, doesn’t really hurt anyone, so why give a fuck?

     
     

    Hey vs, I’ve always wondered: is it slays-with-a-vacuum or is it slayer-of-vaccums?

    I kill vacuums.

    BTW, I wanted to thank you for the b-day wishes! I saw them in the last thread, but I cannot be counted on to respond sometimes because I have a babby for whom doing things like going to the bathroom or getting a cup of coffee can cause major drama.

     
     

    I wonder if one of those has been found in a rectum yet.

    Not so far. But the weekend’s just beginning.

     
     

    Also, let us remember back to the illegal immigrants of our Founding Fathers’ time.

    There was a rash of people coming over on indentured servitude contracts, which were basically slavery for white people, full of trap clauses that extended one’s contract indefinitely. A lot of people used it to come over and then went, see ya sucker, and ran for it, knowing that if they went into the next state or next county, they could throw on a hat and they were then just a regular old citizen and treated as such.

    It was the main reason they switched to importing black slaves, because then if you saw a black person running free you could directly assume they were an escaped slave and thus there was no place to hide and blend in unless they ran straight to Canada (which many did, “illegally immigrating” there.

    But yeah, same damn shit today. Bitching about how every latin@ they see must be an escaped slave, I mean “illegal immigrant”. They don’t need to bitch about the indentured servants escaping, because by making all the system work like that for the bottom rung there really is no place to escape and become an honest citizen.

     
     

    Believe me, with very few exceptions, such men will not hesitate for an instant to forfeit their jobs, go to jail or face deportation to defend their honor against even the merest hint that their manhood is being challenged.

    You do realize you just gave every stupid wingnut here who can read (I know, I know) each a way to get hundreds of Hispanics imprisoned whether they’re legal or not (ICE don’t care). All the wingnut has to learn is how to…Oh shit, I almost did it myself.

     
     

    …says the man who posted pictures of shit at my blog.

    Julie Andrews’ breasts? Shit?

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    Not so far. But the weekend’s just beginning

    Happy hunting!

     
     

    Not so far. But the weekend’s just beginning.

    Well, we know what Snorghagen’s doing when he’s not posting here. Just be sure to wash your hands before you get back to the keyboard.

     
     

    vs:

    Yeah, I thought about unpacking that one, but I found myself unable to, because it was like a stacking set of completely insane assumptions leading into every sentence. Gays are evil. Gays are diseased. The only legitimate response to homosexuality is reparative therapy. NIMBY wallets on any of “their” money going to a minority group. Etc…

    It’s like they’re growing little colonies of monsters perfectly raised in nothing but right-wing dog-whistles and this is their desperate mewling attempts to communicate with the rest of the world.

    It’s like a demonstration of speciation by drift. They are so foreign as to be a completely different cultural species, one I can’t understand and certainly would never be able to sleep with.

     
     

    it made WordPress go pear shaped

    See what happens when you use WordPress & give too much freedom to lowly commenters?

     
     

    Object, object, will thou pass
    Through the folds of Mankind’s ass?
    What exercise of yawning anus
    Could get you in and yet not pain Us?

     
     

    Gays are evil. Gays are diseased. The only legitimate response to homosexuality is reparative therapy.

    I think I’ve read somewhere that the success rate of reparative therapy at Focus on the Family (anyone who knows better numbers feel free to jump in) was something like 30%. And even that’s massively stacking the deck in favor of the Goopers, cause that’s not 30% of the overall gay population – that’s 30% of those gays who are conservative enough that they’ve actually allowed themselves to be convinced they could be “healed” (or live in areas where being gay is such a leprosy-like stigma that they had to try “healing”).

    Anything with a failure rate that staggering is a bullshit art, which of course implies that gays can’t be “healed,” and therefore… well… you’re going to have to find something other than “it’s a lifestyle choice!”

    (The Catholic Church at least appears to acknowledge this on some level, since they’ve said that gays are “called to celibacy” rather than “called to not be gay.” But then, they went and banned gay people from the priesthood, one of the few roles that requires celibacy and in which a gay Catholic could meaningfully integrate his identity with what they’re teaching. Go figure…)

     
     

    Ok, I’ve had enough of arguing with the rubes. I feel I destroyed them. They feel hungry for something deep-fried, I would assume.

    You should all check out my exquisite trolling. These were the easiest ones to damage–the ones who truly believe they’re intelligent. Poor homeschooled rubes. They’re such a mess.

     
     

    as Burke said, “a very great part of the mischiefs that vex this world arise from words.”

    Are there no pedantic grammarians at S,N! who will fix this distortion of Burke’s actual words?

     
     

    I think snake oil had a 30% success rate, by way of the placebo effect.

     
     

    I was all for deporting illegal aliens, until I found out they weren’t talking about the Reptilians.

    Reptilians assRepublicans!
    .

     
     

    Ok, I’ve had enough of arguing with the rubes.

    That was me two or three years ago.

     
     

    Last tiger mango:

    Actually, it is very simple to enforce the Constitution we do have – execute everyone who has breached the Constitution, Rule of Law, the Organic Laws of the united States of America, or the Oath they Swore before God, for the treasons they have committed …… it would not take many to get this nation back where she belongs.
    People do not seem to understand – if one word, or the meaning of one word is altered from how it was written, the the Constitution is not being followed and this nation no longer exists. No where in the Constitution does it give even the supreme court the power to “interpret” the Constitution.

    In order for a law to actually BE LAW it must be clearly understandable by the common man, otherwise it is someone’s opinion, rather than the law itself, that he is expected to obey.

    Someone is an internet tough guy.

    Also comes complete with constitution fetishism without understanding of the constitution. I almost want them to try and have to live up to their bullshit “constitution only” crap and slowly come to terms with the fact that we’re using the American Constitution and Amendments rather than the Confederate one and they aren’t allowed to pick and choose and weasel words around things like the 10th Amendment (which has often been rather abused and ignored, even by the “even the liberal” Supreme Court).

     
     

    I can’t believe I waited until last month to watch They Live. I’ve been obsessed with David Icke’s Reptilian thing since high school.

    Hilarious movie.

     
     

    That was me two or three years ago.

    Sometimes I feel like I have a boner for internet trolling.

     
     

    I can’t believe I waited until last month to watch They Live.

    Good fight scene. And watching Rowdy Roddy Piper NOT scream was interesting.

     
     

    “tsam said,
    October 1, 2011 at 2:12

    That was me two or three years ago.

    Sometimes I feel like I have a boner for internet trolling.”

    Internet pron: ur doin it rong

     
     

    Internet pron: ur doin it rong

    Me no understand.

     
     

    Object, object, will thou pass
    Through the folds of Mankind’s ass?
    What exercise of yawning anus
    Could get you in and yet not pain Us?

    Behold the variety of human experience! And above all this classic.

    That was one of the first sites I found back when I bought my first com-pew-ter and wandered onto the intertoobs.

     
     

    Oh and from the last delightful person I quoted:

    execute everyone who has breached the Constitution…or the Oath they Swore before God

    Didn’t even make it into the meat of his first sentence before he would have to execute himself by his own standard. First amendment too, very poor show.

    Also, he mentioned something called “organic laws” and I’m almost scared to ask. I’d assume it’s like the “natural law” bullshit that the catholics have been on, but I’m askeered to know for sure.

    But yeah, shorter every wingnut ever:

    “I want to do anything I want whenever I want and be praised even by my victims for doing it and I want those I disagree with punished in some way, ideally violently, for not fitting into my views of how the world should work and making me have to think about how it actually does work.”

    If we were to institute his eliminationist fantasy he’d be mewling all the way to the chopping block, “but but I meant apply it to the brown people, it’s not meant to apply to Mee-ee-ee!”

     
     

    They Live? Haven’t seen it. Is it required horror?

    I don’t know about required, but it’s basically exactly David Icke’s conspiracy theory as a stupid action movie. It also has this one fight scene that goes on forever and serves no real purpose.

    Also the origin of the phrase, “I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass…and I’m all out of bubblegum.”

     
     

    “Also the origin of the phrase, “I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass…and I’m all out of bubblegum.”

    SOLD.

     
     

    They Live? Haven’t seen it. Is it required horror?

    It explains Republicanism perfectly.
    .

     
     

    Not when you can have sex with an affectionate, attractive sea cucumber that’s sensitive to your needs.

    The love that cannot pronounce its name.

    Also, let us remember back to the illegal immigrants of our Founding Fathers’ time.

    One of the complaints against the King in the Declaration of Independence was he was restricting the immigration necessary for the health of the colonies: “He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.”

     
     

    And you just “stumbled onto it,” right?

    When I figured out how them search engine thingies worked, I’d spend all night entering phrases like ‘nazi accountant love slaves’ or ‘hagfish slime’ or ‘objects stuffed in buttholes’ to see what popped up.

     
     

    We know what popped up. Pervert.

     
     

    I have no wish to know what makes something pop up chez Snorghagen.

     
     

    I have no wish to know what makes something pop up chez Snorghagen.

    C’mon, don’t you want the traffic?

     
     

    No where in the Constitution does it give even the supreme court the power to “interpret” the Constitution.

    Article 3: “The judicial power [of the Supreme Court] shall extend to all cases, in law and equity, arising under this Constitution…”

    How can they rule in Constitutional cases without interpreting the Constitution?

    Also of interest in Article 3: “Treason against the United States, shall consist only in levying war against them, or in adhering to their enemies, giving them aid and comfort.”

    So no, you can’t just execute people for not being virulent right-wing nut bars, and you sure as fuck can’t agitate for something so unconstitutional to be done as a punishment for “breaching” the Constitution unless you put yourself in the front of the line. IOW, kill yourself now.

     
     

    Scoff if you like, but there can be no true love without hagfish slime.

     
     

    The love that cannot pronounce its name.

    Relevant.

     
     

    I picture something like that image of fish being eaten by progressively larger fish, only it’s poop chutes instead of mouths.

     
     

    sometimes two animals (male and female when that is the case) will geneally live in (the anus of) a single host sea cucumber

    It’s not much, but they call it home.

     
     

    if one word, or the meaning of one word is altered from how it was written, the the Constitution is not being followed and this nation no longer exists.

    Still going through my copy of the Constitution looking for “Warrantless wiretap”, “Enhanced Interrogation” or “Unitary Executive”……

     
     

    In order for a law to actually BE LAW it must be clearly understandable by the common man spoken by the voices I hear in my brain.

     
     

    I picture something like that image of fish being eaten by progressively larger fish

    Not so much a Turducken as a Fishishishishish.

     
     

    Sea cucumbers are big fleshy bags full of water and guts

    Jonah Goldberg is a sea cucumber?

     
     

    Not so much a Turducken as a Fishishishishish.

    Fische grosse, fische kleine

     
     

    Poop isn’t water.

     
    Illuminati Repton
     

    I was all for deporting illegal aliens, until I found out they weren’t talking about the Reptilians.

    We get a raw deal. Sure, you let us in to work for your redneck-abducting and cattle-mutilating jobs, but whenever we step out of our subterranean bunkers, people just freak the fuck out.

    Also, the picture at the end of that link is hideous.

     
     

    Poop isn’t water.

    Ugly bags of mostly poop.
    .

     
     

    Also, the picture at the end of that link is hideous.

    Granted, I’m not the best drawist in the world, but “hideous”?

    *Sadface emoticon*

     
     

    He’s just jealous of that 12-pack thorax. Rowr.

     
     

    Granted, I’m not the best drawist in the world, but “hideous”?

    Whoa, isn’t it supposed to be hideous? It is a monster, no?

     
     

    Whoa, isn’t it supposed to be hideous? It is a monster, no?

    You mean you’re not turned on by giant lizard people? You’re crazy. Right, guys?

    Right?

     
     

    giant lizard people

    5.5-9′ tall?

    Clearly, if you call that “giant,” you haven’t been in some of the backwater bars I’ve been known to frequent!
    .

     
     

    You mean you’re not turned on by giant lizard people?

    You mean like this?

    http://karltate.files.wordpress.com/2006/06/gorn_05.jpg

     
     

    Huzzzzzz! Huzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
    .

     
     

    Not so much a Turducken as a Fishishishishish.

    I don’t want to know why Lyndon LaRouche has anything to do w/ that.

     
     

    You mean like this?

    The censors removed the scene in which Kirk banged the Gorn.

    Also, do to special effects budgets, they couldn’t show any of the other non-humanoid aliens Kirk banged- “Spock… I… don’t even know… what function that orifice serves… but I’m going… to stick… my cock in it!”

    “Highly illogical.”

     
     

    You mean like this?

    The censors removed the scene in which Kirk banged the Gorn.

    Also, due to special effects budgets, they couldn’t show any of the other non-humanoid aliens Kirk banged- “Spock… I… don’t even know… what function that orifice serves… but I’m going… to stick… my cock in it!”

    “Highly illogical.”

     
     

    Fuck WordPress! Ignore the first of those two comments, in which I typed “do” instead of “due”. Been a long day…

     
     

    This is James T. Kirk we’re talking about here. He probably banged a Horta at some point.

     
     

    Kirk banged a tribble. We all know it but no one wants to talk about it.

     
     

    u all r funneh tonight…i am seriously POOPED and going to bed…being that girl is super-tiring apparently…

     
     

    Wait a minute.

    Back to the loon quoted at 2:09…

    execute everyone who has breached… the Oath they Swore before God

    Is he saying that he wants to shoot people for violating the Pledge of Allegiance?

     
     

    Sometimes I feel like I have a boner for internet trolling.

    Heh, indeed.

    That the Hofts & Althouses & Steyns who leave their proverbial goolies to swing in the breeze on the magical Series Of Tubes often wish they had an “UNSAY” button if I come a-visitin’ pains my tender heart not so much.

    Some might argue that I have a certain, er, spiritual solidarity with teh Channers (a fricking humungous Interwebs community of cultural niches both huge & tiny, of whom /r/aids & /b/tards are statistically a marginal minority) … & (for example) simply threadshitting with copypasta is seen as lazy – & a tacit admission of being a dolt. Dialog-trolls* are seen as a weak joke. No good troll ever has to bother with more than 1-3 comments, the fewer the better – & continuing for days implies that your original “LOL PWNT” scenario is now an ad-lib geek-show of which you are the main unattracrion &/or that you are on meth or uppers.

    Come with reality or fail.

    You can only sharpen bullshit until it thaws out, & it thaws incredibly fast on the Interwebs.
    ________________________________

    * Dennis said,

    October 1, 2011 at 0:16 (unkill)

     
     

    I’M TROLLING THAT MOTHERFUCKER TO PIECES

    Yes you are. Bravo sir.

     
     

    Also never have sex with a sheep. It’ll be dirty for the both of you. So so dirty and…what was I saying?

    If you can’t be with teh sheep you love,,,

     
     

    Heh, banging the horta.

     
     

    If you can’t be with teh sheep you love,,,

    The love that dare not bleat its name.

     
     

    Dialog-trolls* are seen as a weak joke.

    His weird appeal to a regular for advice after such trollery seemed like a creepy attempt to humanise himself- went over like a lead balloon, it did.

     
     

    They Live? Haven’t seen it. Is it required horror?

    O. M. G.

    The movie that brought us and I’m all out of bubble gum! That “good fight scene” cited by McG is five minutes of sweaty “totes heterosexual” man on man grabbing at each other punctuated with nutshots and dry humping. It is a Classic. Must-see. Possibly the most seminal* movie Roddy Piper has done other than Hell Comes to Frogtown.

    *yes, I mean seminal.

     
     

    O…M…G…

    A Hell Comes to Frogtown reference. Next thing you know someone will be talking up Humanoids From the Deep.

     
     

    PWND BY DENNIS AGAIN? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO11!!!!!!!

    Funny, Dennis, you didn’t bother to post the comment to which that reply was directed, nor did you post any of my other comments. Actually, strike that. It’s not funny. It’s sadly predictable and says everything that needs to be known about you.

    You’re a bad person, Dennis. You’re a pseudo-intellectual internet troll who doesn’t have the good sense to obey that tired feeling and go away. What do you want, Dennis? You got something to prove? Do you think that you’re going to affect my self esteem or some shit? I mean, what’s your deal, son?

     
     

    Humanoids From the Deep.

    OMG my grandparents let me watch that when I was way too young and BOOBS! and violence and stuff. It gave me nightmares.

     
     

    Hey, any grammar nerds up?

    I’m writing a poem and was wondering what term would work for a line.

    So here’s the bit:

    “All my carefully honed blades
    Unable to find purchase to defend myself”

    Is the term “purchase” correct or should I be using perch or something else?

     
     

    tsam – yes, as I recall, flat-chested women were pretty much safe from the humanoids. They didn’t bother chasing anything that didn’t have big boobies that would flop around when running.

     
     

    I like it like that Cerberus–assuming I get the image you’re trying to create. Not sure it could be explained, but I like it.

     
     

    tsam – yes, as I recall, flat-chested women were pretty much safe from the humanoids.

    They came to MATE! IN ARE BASE HUMPIN ARE BITCHEZ!

     
     

    He probably banged a Horta at some point.

    “I’m a hortaculturalist, Bones.”

    Is the term “purchase” correct or should I be using perch or something else?
    ‘Purchase’ (“A means of exerting influence or gaining advantage”) looks fine to me.

     
     

    Come with reality or fail.

    Sadly, when pushed, right wingers go right to “let them die!”.

    The fuckwit that provoked my curse said he would continue to torture gays until there are none left (because the torture contributes to suicidal tendencies). I’m now trying to stamp down the urge to be depressed and hate humanity and convince myself that it’s all hopeless…

    Of course, along comes our resident 3 legged, one eyed troll to paste my outburst and give me shit about it. He doesn’t realize that constitutes a defense of the statement to which that one was responding, I think.

     
     

    Yep, Cerber, I’ll pedant in agreement w/ Smut.

    3 a (1) : a mechanical hold or advantage applied to the raising or moving of heavy bodies (2) : an apparatus or device by which advantage is gained

    A more common use might be “gain purchase,” as a whiny commenter remarks:

    Has anyone else noticed the word purchase used in novels as in “to gain purchase”? I think it is a publishing house game among editors but can’t find proof of this. My son and I, while reading, will blurt out the sentence when we come to this word.

     
     

    Sage Francis idolater approves.

     
     

    We call it tranya! Hahahahahaha!
    .

     
    James T. Rex Kirk
     

    Get it on………….
    Bang a Gorn…………
    Get it on!!

     
     

    Thanks for the help. Sent in the full poem, which is a beast in length, will see if it gets selected for the reading.

     
     

    Man, the comment thread of the original post is really like looking into a black hole.

    That “execute people as traitors anyone who doesn’t follow the constitution I don’t know” guy got a lot of responses.

    Supporting him.

    And attacking someone who was just full Glenn Beck because he couldn’t quite go the full distance to “let’s just start murdering 99% of the population because of the voices in my head”.

    Lots of “Then, are you saying that a traitor to the American people and the Constitution of the USA should be left alone and not prosecuted?” and other complete insane internet tough guy poses.

    I’m not sure what the people there have, but I’m pretty sure it should either be medicated or if medicated at home, regulated.

    It’s like if meth itself gained sentience and washed itself in 70 years of toxic masculinity and persecution complexes.

     
     

    the full poem, which is a beast in length

    Is it really?

     
     

    No John, it’s just happy to see you.

     
     

    “All my carefully honed blades
    Unable to find purchase to defend myself”

    Is the term “purchase” correct or should I be using perch or something else?

    It’s not incorrect, but it depends on context, Cerb, and intention.

    If you’ve just pulled the blades out to use, and you can’t find a place to use them, that would be a good use of purchase. (hypothetical: you’ve just come across a closeted thong-obsessed troll who feels grave discomfort at your “condition” but who is so obese, you can’t find a place to stab him and end his confused misery)

    If you mean can’t find a handle to hold them by, that’s a slightly incorrect use, but could be defensible defensible in context.

    But….

    It’s poetry and so you are not bound by the rules of word salad kreplach.

     
     

    Oh.

    And….

    DenDenDumDum?

    *ahem*

    win!

     
     

    you’ve just come across a closeted thong-obsessed troll who feels grave discomfort at your “condition” but who is so obese, you can’t find a place to stab him and end his confused misery

    Just slap their thigh and ride the wave in……

     
     

    Kirk banged a tribble. We all know it but no one wants to talk about it.

    I needed this.

    Also, I would like to talk about it in explicit, pornographic detail.

     
     

    Good morning vs

    I see we still have our troll infestation.

     
     

    Huh.

    Given the sudden increase in paragraph length, it would appear that the resident guinea pig-troll is making a bid for Cerberus’ position…

     
     

    And of course there is no asshole… just the stench of one.
    .

     
     

    Good morning vs

    I see we still have our troll infestation.

    Yeah, I see. At least I will have access to my desktop most of the day, which means ENGAGE KILLFILE!!

     
     

    Also, good morning!

     
     

    Yeah, I see. At least I will have access to my desktop most of the day, which means ENGAGE KILLFILE!!

    i was hoping that since his ‘hitler’ request was granted, that he was indeed going to go away…so much his writing of ‘hypocrites’ and ‘lying’ but, anyhoo…it’s a lovely day here and thus far my plans are to visit the farmer’s market, go to a ‘harvest fest’ event at a local orchard, visit hubbkf at his art crawl studio tour (he sold two framed photographs yestiddy!), then off to spend the rest of the weekend with teh daughter wherein we are going to do some shopping, spectatoring at a college ball game and dining at our area’s premier italian restaurant…

    i know! i’m exhausted just reading about it!

     
     

    We talked the whole night through. Good morning, good morning to you.

     
     

    i was hoping that since his ‘hitler’ request was granted, that he was indeed going to go away…so much his writing of ‘hypocrites’ and ‘lying’ but, anyhoo…it’s a lovely day here and thus far my plans are to visit the farmer’s market, go to a ‘harvest fest’ event at a local orchard, visit hubbkf at his art crawl studio tour (he sold two framed photographs yestiddy!), then off to spend the rest of the weekend with teh daughter wherein we are going to do some shopping, spectatoring at a college ball game and dining at our area’s premier italian restaurant…

    i know! i’m exhausted just reading about it!

    You’re so lucky. It’s gray and yucky out here. And today is supposed to be my “day off.” It doesn’t seem like it is, though.

     
     

    It’s but one reason there can be no trolls.

    Not true, actually. There are some assholes who actually witty, even endearing. Trolls tend not to be these things. So, yeah. Trolls and assholes are two completely different animals.

     
     

    unsolicited, unwanted not getting raped advice article from another website i spend way too much time at…

     
     

    Not true, actually. There are some assholes who actually witty, even endearing. Trolls tend not to be these things. So, yeah. Trolls and assholes are two completely different animals.

    a finely honed sense of smell will help differentiate the two…

     
     

    You’re so lucky. It’s gray and yucky out here. And today is supposed to be my “day off.” It doesn’t seem like it is, though.

    boo! the only time i like gray and yucky days are when i am able to lounge about on the sofa either reading a book or bingeing on lifetime movies…but i have no babbies at home and i’m guessing part of your ‘day off’ is limited babby tending and staying in would lessen that probability quite sharply…

     
     

    unsolicited, unwanted not getting raped advice article from another website i spend way too much time at…

    Jesus. If the cops want to deter rapists, why don’t they try CATCHING SOME.

     
     

    unsolicited, unwanted not getting raped advice article from another website i spend way too much time at…

    That this kind of thing still goes on in this day and age makes me want to hurl myself out a 5 story window.

    HEY FUCKFACES: WHEN I GO OUTSIDE, IT’S NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY NOT TO GET RAPED, IT’S YOUR RESPONSIBILITY NOT TO RAPE ME.

     
     

    boo! the only time i like gray and yucky days are when i am able to lounge about on the sofa either reading a book or bingeing on lifetime movies…but i have no babbies at home and i’m guessing part of your ‘day off’ is limited babby tending and staying in would lessen that probability quite sharply…

    I’m supposed to not have to tend the baby today, but the day already started with a fight and what I’m feeling as resentment. So unless the day improves quickly, this day is already ruined for me. Sorry. Boo-hoo for me. Meh. I bore myself. Let’s talk about other things.

     
     

    Can you imagine the response to a string of arson cases being to scold people owning flammable buildings?

     
     

    Jesus. If the cops want to deter rapists, why don’t they try CATCHING SOME.

    And put themselves out of business?
    ~

     
     

    While hagfish slime is, er, astonishiing, I’ve never known anyone that found it sexy. I’m sure they’re out there. Squid, on the other hand, going back to N__B’s hentai visions, are sometimes irresistible to the perverts that are debeaking them for hours. After thousands they find one that is just the right size and after de-beaking (which includes emptying the guts out) they put it to unspeakable porpoises.

     
     

    Can you imagine the response to a string of arson cases being to scold people owning flammable buildings?

    Your building was asking for it! With its sexy old insulation! You know it!

     
     

    Jonah Goldberg! Hey, have a seat!

    Um… this chair will be more comfortable, Jo.

    [just had it Scotchguarded™]
    .

     
     

    There are some assholes who actually witty, even endearing.

    Aw, shucks, ma’am…

     
     

    Trolling cannot be cheered and denounced at the same time except on a snark blog. Therefore, trolling cannot be defined on a snark blog

    I don’t see why not.

     
     

    Therefore, trolling cannot be defined on a snark blog

    Sure, it can. We covered this the other night. Failure to read (or more importantly, to act appropriately on) social cues.

    After being notified of the offending behavior, assuming no Asperger’s, then the acting inappropriately is the very definition of trolling. The purpose of the communication not being to laugh and snark and socialize with the other children, but to act out and become the focus of negative attention.
    .

     
     

    I’m supposed to not have to tend the baby today, but the day already started with a fight and what I’m feeling as resentment. So unless the day improves quickly, this day is already ruined for me. Sorry. Boo-hoo for me. Meh. I bore myself. Let’s talk about other things.

    just going to say that i hope your day gets better…and remember you’re not alone in this…oh, my hubbkf and i used to have some flare ups! all a dim memory now…

    hmmm…other things….looking at your artwork, your backgrounds or ‘scapes or what have you are really cool looking…as are the persons you place in them…hubbkf sticks to non-people photos…i just wonder what you could do with some of his landscapes…

     
     

    I think a troll is largely defined by its surroundings. For instance, tsam is not a troll here, because he is liked here. He admits that he is “trolling” on another blog. So, in a way, you are making my point for me.

    Now, it’s true, that liberals USUALLY “troll” on conservative blogs with facts and logic, whereas conservatives attempt to troll on liberal blogs (and liberal SNARK blogs) with copy-paste nonsense pulled right from Glenn Beck’s ass or Frank Luntz talking points….but for the purposes of this conversation, I’m willing to grant that liberals still sometimes troll.

     
     

    hmmm…other things….looking at your artwork, your backgrounds or ‘scapes or what have you are really cool looking…as are the persons you place in them…hubbkf sticks to non-people photos…i just wonder what you could do with some of his landscapes…

    Do you have a photo account? I love looking at people’s nature photogs.

     
     

    Also, you were the one who objected to my use of the word “condition”, but you didn’t say why. That was cowardice.

    It still is.

    you know, i was thinking about this earlier this morning…putting aside the mental illness and clinical usage of ‘condition’ it just struck me as offensive to refer to anyone undergoing gender re-assignment as having a ‘condition’… mean, what gender we are affects everything about us…and asking someone about their ‘condition’ in the way i recall you asking it just seemed dismissive of the enormity of what cerb and others like her have to wrestle with each and every day…

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    Trolling cannot be cheered and denounced at the same time except on a snark blog. Therefore, trolling cannot be defined on a snark blog

    That’s just like what Hitler said!

     
     

    That’s just like what Hitler said!

    Hitler didn’t sound quite so much like Jonah Goldberg, though. Then again, I’m sure it sounded better in the original German…
    .

     
    Helmut Monotreme
     

    Folks I hate be off topic and stuff, but I recently became aware of an emergency at the South Pole. One of the first things that happened when I began my year in Antarctica back in 1999 was the medical evacuation of Dr. Jerri Neilsen. Well another person, Renee – Nicole Douceur the station manager needs a medevac in the wake of a stroke she suffered. So far, Raytheon and the national Science foundation are content to wait a month or so before evacuating her. She needs treatment urgently, and I guarantee the south pole is no place to try and recover from any injury much less a stroke. I would like to ask you to take a minute to visit saverenee.org and at least sign the petition at whitehouse.gov linked from there. If you want to do more, please contact newspapers or your congressperson. Thank you.

     
     

    Are you saying…

    I’m saying if you find a single blog that has its own lexicon, and a written definition for “troll,” I will respond to you in the future.
    .

     
     

    I’m saying if you find a single blog that has its own lexicon, and a written definition for “troll,” I will respond to you in the future.

    The all-knowing Wiki of pedias contributes its $0.02 to your dilemma:

    Troll (Internet), an internet term for a person who, through willful action, attempts to disrupt a community or garner attention and controversy through provocative messages

    Also this.

     
     

    Badger, badger, badger, badger, badger.
    .

     
     

    That’s chickenshit to take issue with it the way you did multiple times to the point of mockery and then pride, and explain it now in terms of how it “seemed” to you then.

    Chickenshit, bbkf.

    nope, i still take *issue* with it…and i believe i only referred to your usage of it twice…i perhaps should have proofed my response to you a little better, because instead of the past tense, i should have used present…

     
     

    Do you have a photo account? I love looking at people’s nature photogs.

    he’s got one somewhere…but i think he brought all his business cards with him to the studio, and i of course cannot recall what the url is nor do i have it bookmarked…i will try to remember to get it to you…

     
     

    Sorry this is so last-thready, but I cannot shake the notion that Obama should campaign using the speech patterns of a Harvard-educated gay black jew. Since there are no contradictions in the combo, and he’s got half of it covered already, I see no barriers or downsides.

     
     

    It was just two days ago, and you were proud of yourself for it. You responded to other people wooting you over it more than twice.

    well forgive me on that one, dennis…many, many things occur in my life on any given day, and i can’t recall all of them with perfect clarity…

    the only things i am proud of on sadly, no! is when i make a particularly funneh remark and/or clever pun or something like that…i am very aware of my ditzy tendencies (and when you are on on-air personality on the town’s only radio station EVERYONE is aware of your ditziness and will remind you any chance they get) and so tend not to take too much pride in my remarks as i know they can very well be full of error…

    and with that, i am off to start my day…anxious to get up to teh daughter’s place and hang out with her…even though her condition (see what i did there) makes her challenging at times, her lack of guile and innate sweetness are always welcome…as are her bursts of humor…and sometimes the things she perceives are just down right amazing….guess which one of us she takes after?

     
     

    OT. Bobo: Empathy is teh dum.

    I seriously have no idea what I just read.

     
     

    the only things i am proud of on sadly, no! is when i make a particularly funneh remark and/or clever pun or something like that…i am very aware of my ditzy tendencies (and when you are on on-air personality on the town’s only radio station EVERYONE is aware of your ditziness and will remind you any chance they get) and so tend not to take too much pride in my remarks as i know they can very well be full of error…

    It’s weird. You’ve never come across as ditzy to me; just bad with tags.

     
     

    I seriously have no idea what I just read.

    also too…

    Congrats, bbkf.

    The only thing that could ever get me even mildly rankled on a snark blog is cowardice from someone accusing me of something they won’t explain but instead dishonestly try to pass something bogus off as serious as to their reason.

    So, WIN for you.

    heh…okay, i’m off! have a lovely day, y’all!

     
     

    and it’s on the thread just before this one, so really, again you are being dishonest and cowardly. If you’re not going to be truthful, then please, just be done and go enjoy your day.

    also, NOT dishonest and cowardly just not inclined to sifting through a gazillion comments just to make dennis feel better…

     
     

    It’s weird. You’ve never come across as ditzy to me; just bad with tags

    thanks…and that is so true

     
     

    okay, now i’m really leaving…this is what is known as ‘the minnesota long good bye’….

     
     

    I mean it sounds as if he’s trying to excuse people for not being empathetic. Which is rilly rilly convenient, ‘cuz the empathy gene seems to be missing in conservatives. Then again, he blathers on about codes. And codes are good. And adulterers and drug dealers are bad. Nope. Still have no idea what I just read.

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    I have to vote for a dog. DOGZ ROOL!

     
     

    I have to vote for a dog. DOGZ ROOL!

    They generally drool, but that’s okay — I luv ’em, too.

    And unless you’re in SF tonight, you can no longer vote. They have a live party tonight for final voting, drinking, oohing and ahhing.
    .

     
     

    Hee hee. ON A SNARK BLOG. Hee.

    Doesn’t like pedants. What do you do?
    Doesn’t like snark blogs. What do you do?
    Subtle innuendo follows,,,
    I totally fucked your mom.

    New Rule: There can be no trolls at snark blogs. Because IT’S A SNARK BLOG!

    Okay in that case New Rule: Dennis means “poo poo head”. No takebacks times over nine thousand!

    You know, a couple weeks ago you made an effort to not just pick some random aspect to insult us over, but actually try and state some things that bother you. Or so I thought. Apparently that’s beyond your abilities. Your entire schtick apparently is grabbing at straws (I assume it’s because they remind you of your penis) and flinging random bits of p00p at teh wall to see what sticks. d00d – totes ineffective since every single time you do it, you have to pull our words and actions totally out of context.

    I mean okay, we get it. You don’t like us. You are so much bettar than us so that’s why it’s all smug sense of self righteous superiority. Great. Fantastic Dennis, you get an A-triple-plus with scratch-n-sniff sticker. I’ll not bother getting into teh LOL-tastic-ness that you of all fucking people – who has been stinking up these comment threads for weeks now and have yet to explain what your problem with us is (other than apparently OMG A SNARK BLOG) – would accuse someone of cowardice for objecting to something without saying why.

    But that’s okay. Because of course everywhere in the world automatically has to adjust all of their customs and rules and behaviour and suchfor when you show up. And anything that doesn’t match Dennis’ strict definition of what is right and proper must be stopped. And nothing has any meaning until Dennis decrees what it is. So, pray tell, what teh hell does “snark blog” mean?

     
    Pupienus Maximus
     

    Would you vote for This doggy?

     
     

    Yes. Yes I would.

     
     

    This joint constantly brings the smart out in us as well as the smartass – ’tis the Sadlymagick working its glamour.

    So, I strongly suspect that the overwhelming majority of those who troll here have a seriously red-hot mad-on against smart people. Also, since IQ points have a well-known liberal bias, it is noteworthy that an online Uptighty-Righty is logically correct to despise any coterie of Smarty McSmartersons, here or anywhere.

    If you have a legit mental illness &/or some unfortunate neurological condition, you’re going to be seen as more an object of pity than anything (see: andonandonandonandfuckingon), but I get the sense that the bulk of these goobers could readily rise up to the Sadlynaut level if they just dislodged their thumb from their arse & worked at it & exercised a tad more mental self-discipline (the latest model acts civil enough at first blush, but always winds up having to fall back on divide-&-conquer, cherry-picking, revealing our shameful state of False Scotsmanhood & all the other SHOPWORN traits of the griefoholic). It’s the old subtle-yet-vital distinction between honest ignorance & stupidity: a lot of those who vote Gooper are just clue-deprived & hoodwinked; the wingnuts who whore themselves out to DO the hoodwinking are (to varying degrees) cunning dipshits. Granted, both groups are dangerous in their own way, but the latter are truly dedicated afficionados of douchery.

    I seriously have no idea what I just read.

    Bravo! Bobo seriously has no ideas.

    He gets eviscerated in the comments – they’re well worth a boo.

     
     

    Can you imagine the response to a string of arson cases being to scold people owning flammable buildings?

    Yes, I can, but I also wrote my thesis on the history of building code response to catastrophic fires.

    And for VS:

    Kirk ran his fingers through the tribble’s long, silky hair.

    “Purr for me, baby” he said.

    Purrrr.

    “Now,” Kirk said, “You must have an orifice somewhere!

     
     

    the bulk of these goobers could readily rise up to the Sadlynaut level

    Talk about your low bars and saloons. We POOP to conquer.

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    Shorter Bobo: “People do good deeds not because they care but to garner admiration or avoid dishonor.” No authoritarian bent to Bobo, not one bit.

     
     

    Are we sure Kirk used the Tribble’s orifice for the sex? He didn’t Richard Gere the thing?

     
    Food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland Pupienus Maximus
     

    It would have been a very small orifice, too small even for Shatner?

     
     

    I always figured Kirk just used the tribble for jerking off.

     
     

    Lol. Ever the predictable little stain

     
     

    I’m asking you to tell me what a snark blog is. If this being a snark blog excuses you from doing things like carpet-bombing Amazon.com book reviews of conservative writers….

    I don’t recall anyone dying and making you hall monitor, Dennis.

     
     

    Actor 212 Troll-Proclaimed Manipulator of Time and Space and Orifice TinTin sent me Dennis-Stealer of Boxing Trunks’ the IP address of the Loathesome Loser* at my request and it has been sent to Perverted Justice and Chris Hansen. They were familiar with the case. I can’t repeat the details even on a snark blog – suffice to say, he received standing O’s from Mickey Kaus and Pope Enabler. There isn’t an 8 year-old in Hogswaller, Louisiana, who hasn’t been through the emergency presentation at school.
    We’ll get him, its only a matter of time – actually, given his ravenous appetites and the bloody trail he’s left, shouldn’t be long at all.

    But really Dennis – while dressed as Kathryn Jean?! You sick fuck…

    *VLRBR?

     
     

    BLART BLART BLART BLART BLART BLART

     
     

    Bail who out? If you’re talking about jim, that dude needs no help from me.

     
     

    I believe the rule was more along the lines of “don’t be an asshole.”

     
     

    Is it really that clueless? Perhaps due to a neurotic condition?

     
     

    You know WHO ELSE had a sex doll?

     
     

    I’m asking that hall monitor to not be so lazy.

    Why not just leave? You admit you aren’t happy here and it’s obvious you don’t like anyone here and no one here likes you. So leave already, instead of trying to impose your own set of rules onto people you hate who hate you. You want to make the rules? Fine, set up your own fucking blog and stay there.

     
     

    The foul odor of troll spoor is strong in this place.

     
     

    Again with the cherry picking. You roll with that dennis. Seems to work for you. Go ahead and pat yourself on the back while you look down upon us idiot liberals. You think that keeping your temper and trying to reason with a guy who openly laughs about the high suicide rate among homosexual teens is a virtue, and that’s cool for you. Shit, judging by the effort you put into crying about my response, i’m thinking you agree with the guy. That’s all we know about you. That’s why we hate you. That’s why you should go find another sandbox to shit in.

    I have had enough of you and i’m now done with you. Go fuck yourself, dennis.

     
     

    Dennis. What? I still don’t get your point.

    Carpet-bombing Amazon? You got a problem with reviews at Amazon.com, take it uo with Amazon.com. I have no idea what that has to do with S,N!

    As for your other gotchas – Dennis, perhaps you don’t understand this concept, but the basic idea is that the context in which the statement is made is the important part. Do I condone death threats? Generally no. But if they are not meant seriously and are genuinely funneh and most importantly teh target of teh threat doesn’t actually evar feel threatened – then yes, fair game. A-OK.

    This is what I mean – you take statements made by people, remove all context from them and then act huffy and offended. That is fucking bullshit. If there’s a problem in that chain of events, the problem is yours.

    You wanna know the rules? I call shenanigans. You don’t give a fuck about “the rules”. This is yet another in your long fucking line of random attacks. You haven’t the slightest intention of behaving in any way that anyone might request – your only goal is to try and piss people off. And you still haven’t said why. Cowardice by your own fucking definition you little chickenshit.

    BUT, since I am a generous and giving Dragon-King (as your mom will attest) – here’s a very simple basic guideline for you to follow. Try and exercise some empathy for others NOT IN ORDER TO MAKE THEM FEEL BAD. Plain and simple. You’ve been following long enough to know a bit about teh regulars, and if you have a beef with what they do, go ahead and say that – but FFS, this constant trying to get under people’s skin specifically in order to make them feel bad? That’s trolling.

     
     

    So I’m thinking, no, that one’s not a good guideline for me.

    Colour me surprised.

     
     

    I tried to explore that line of logic, Pupienus. Other people seemed to disagree, that ‘even though many of us were assholes and we are all equal assholes, some assholes are more equal than others.’

    No. No, you did not. We call you a troll because you are a troll.

     
     

    We call you a troll because you are a troll

    Intuitively obvious to even the most casual observer statement is intuitively obvious to even the most casual observer.

     
     

    Chris-

    Huh.

    Given the sudden increase in paragraph length, it would appear that the resident guinea pig-troll is making a bid for Cerberus’ position…

    There can be only one, Highlander!

    actor-

    It’s not incorrect, but it depends on context, Cerb, and intention.

    If you’ve just pulled the blades out to use, and you can’t find a place to use them, that would be a good use of purchase.

    Okay, then I used it right. Thanks again for everyone’s help on that.

     
     

    You want some moar clarification? It’s not a left-right thing. I’m way to teh left of teh S,N! median on a wide range of issues and way to teh right on others. There are actual disagreements here, and I’m pretty sure you know that since you linked me having one with a212. THAT IS ALLOWED. We are allowed to disagree with each other. BUT, since we’re all people as well as sets of opinions, we don’t assume the other person is a bad person for disagreeing with us.

    Anyways, you apparently really want to be an asshole. You know what, okay – that’s fine (although we also reserve the right to react to asshole-ish behaviour approriately). Everyone needs to be an asshole sometimes. BUT there’s teh problem. teh sometimes part. That’s your entire fucking stock in trade. You are a one-trick pony. And teh worst part is that , despite teh attention you’ve garnered, you aren’t even particularly good at being an asshole. HAAMs was more offensive than you just with his nym. You don’t even crack teh Top Ten for this blahg.

     
     

    I call shenanigans again you asshole.

    I fucking dare you to try and make a reasonable comment, one where you try and make some intelligent argument about Occupy Wall Street – without intentionally offending or insulting anyone.

    I fucking dare you.

     
     

    DKW-

    Loathe as I am to re-enter this endless cycle of fail, this:

    I’ll not bother getting into teh LOL-tastic-ness that you of all fucking people – who has been stinking up these comment threads for weeks now and have yet to explain what your problem with us is (other than apparently OMG A SNARK BLOG) – would accuse someone of cowardice for objecting to something without saying why.

    is simplicity itself to answer.

    He came here to stalk actor, because actor banned him at his blog. And actor needed to be hounded because actor hurt his precious with his mean words and that was akin to triple anal rape on Dennis forever more and the worst form of oppression ever faced by man. So Dennis worked himself into a froth about how actor was the embodiment of everything wrong in his life.

    And he followed him here. And since he was here and since he was stalking actor, he needed to self-justify this. So actor became the center of the sadly, no universe and all of us his disciples and so when we refused to join in on Dennis’s stalking, this confirmed that and proved that we were really on in the constant oppression Dennis was feeling and completely in agreement with actor.

    When we rebuked him, noticing his shtick was fundamentally dishonest, tired, and quite a bit pathological at this point (in the real world, this has progressed past the point that I would usually recommend the person get a restraining order and a good friend to stay the night just in case).

    For a conservative, this is the worst possible oppression. Demonstrating that the real world isn’t as they think of it, the filthy untermenschen talking back and looking down on “them”, and so on. This could not be. Literally.

    So, he rewrote that in his head, fired up the self-justification and tried to find a reason that everyone who ever engaged him was a bad person and he was being hounded by them. That’s why you have him now stalking comments by the others, looking for reasons to be scared of tsam, reasons why bbkf doing a rather tame “well, this is just my opinion” is somehow rank cowardice or something (actually Dennis’s response was wholly incomprehensible), reasons why vs is a bad mother, and of course, his odd obsession with me, things I never said, a woefully inaccurate view of transsexuality, and trying to shame me on word count.

    Given the usual pattern of guys like this (I’m thinking of Dennis Markuze or hell, whoever was Troofie), I imagine that he will continue self-justifying and inventing oppression and adopting a thousand “real, true, honest this time” personality aspects and “deep abiding concern” to continue doing his weird hybrid concern troll, psychotic stalker shtick and probably start stalking us at our individual blogs, especially if we all start ignoring him.

    And really, I hope he gets the psychiatric care he needs and that’s it.

    Personally, I’m now more interested in the psychology of the commenters at Human Events. It’s like a whole new species of WTF.

     
     

    Speaking of disagreements amongst Sadlies, Pupieus and I had the mother of them all several years ago in what degenerated into probably one of the longest Sadly comment threads of all time. Said disagreement included a lot of really ugly personal insults too. Yet here both of us are, with my regard for him diminished not in the least – and I hope the same can be said for him. Even if it can’t, we co-exist quite amicably here even after that. Why? Because neither of us was arguing solely on the basis of trying to be an asshole. Both of us believed we were right – and both of us were to some degree right.

    I have a gay friend who took offense with me using the term “homo party”, though I had gotten the term from another gay friend. While I questioned him as to why this offended him, since he used the term “hetero” all the time, I also apologized and ceased using the term in his presence. Why? Because he’s my friend, and I’d have to be an asshole to be purposely using terms with him that I know offend him.

    Did I stop using the term altogether? No. Why? Because, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it – homo is, after all, merely the parallel of hetero. And it’s particularly non-problematic when it’s being used in an ironic sense by someone everyone knows is not a homophobic bigot.

    Of course, you, Dennis, would define this as “hypocrisy”, because clearly if it’s offensive for a homophobe to call something homo, it has to also be offensive for a person who isn’t a homophobe to call something homo. Presumably, Dennis, by your rules, that would include homosexuals who call something homo, so with your “rules” we end up in the ridiculous position of claiming that a homosexual who calls something homo is, ipso facto, a homophobe.

    This is why you’re a fucking idiot.

     
     

    He came here to stalk actor, because actor banned him at his blog.

    Sounds like a reasonable policy. Let’s implement it here.

    Related: in the year or so I’ve been reading Balloon Juice, that blog has turned from a standard Obot vs. Firebagger civil war zone, into a full-fledged Troll Magnet with one or sometimes more of the creatures (but usually the same one) lumbering out of the caves every few days (or more often) and going on a thread-destroying rampage. S, N! has avoided that fate, and I’m grateful for it. If every blog is going to degenerate into a Dennis-feeding frenzy, please, just ban the fucker already.

    Just my two cents to whoever holds the banhammer.

     
     

    Cerberus,

    I know. But I am an optimist at heart. Dennis has displayed a modicum of empathy – but only for the sociopathic reason of sharpening his barbs against others. Still, that displays an understanding that teh other isn’t solely a component of some juvenile ego-stroking fantasy.

    There’s a mountainous lack of self-awareness that he has to overcome, and there certainly appears to be a hard core of insecurity underneath all his gruff exterior, but we all have our own crosses to bear. And maybe I’m a bit delusional myself, but I’m hoping to get him to acknowledge that maybe his inherent offensiveness isn’t actually a virtue.

    Besides, Ultra Ninja’s napping so I’ve got some time to blow anyways.

     
     

    Also, since apparently everyone spent the night arguing with the troll on his bizarre definition and defenses of condition, well here’s why it is bad.

    Because saying the “transgender condition” is like saying the “gay condition”.

    Not that I would expect our resident troll to see the problem with the latter, but seeing as how his current pose is back to the well-meaning moderate who was pounced, pounced he says by the vile evil monsters of sadly, no, simply for trying to belong and not because if he got any more textbook internet troll he would legally be required to live under a bridge, maybe it would be mildly interesting to see the gears jump a chain on that one.

    And yes, it’s a standard concern troll shtick to troll about the definition of trolling and claim that whatever they are doing totally isn’t trolling and it is the community they are concern trolling who is in the wrong by labeling “anyone who disagrees with the regulars” as trolls no matter what, even though there is ample evidence of arguments with people who aren’t trolls even on the thread they are trolling.

    By way of metaphor, it’s basically the same shtick you’d get from an asshole boyfriend who when caught trying to stick his dick up your ass without consent rants about how dare you view him as a rapist and besides he wasn’t going to do anything and the only reason you view him as a rapist is those damn feminazi friends of yours and men aren’t the enemy people.

    Point being that it’s never the actual arguments, it’s more about throwing up enough shit to try and shame the audience from backing off the truth, because most people have an inherent desire to want to be “fair” and think well of people so the false good faith gambit is often quite successful and since the concern troll isn’t arguing their actual feelings, it really doesn’t matter what the person says back to them outside of what they can cherry pick to their own end.

     
     

    Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

    September 30, 2011 at 20:46

    Even worse than Mexicans, this development might lead to an epidemic of male-order brides!!1!

    Epic.

     
     

    Two comments in a row failed to go through, so here’s the Cliffnotes:

    Actor banned Dennis? That’s fantastic. And if every thread is going to turn to troll feeding, I heartily suggest that whoever holds the Ban Hammer over here follow the man’s lead.

     
     

    Cerb,

    All true. Dennis can’t actually argue anything because he has to manipulate and alter teh context of everything that occurs. He’s playing with a separate set of rules and definitions for everything – although that’s not immediately obvious since he doesn’t so much as change definitions, but rather omits characteristics of things that he lumps into those definitions. As a result, his accusations superficially seem liek something a non-crazy person might think, but any knowledge of teh actual events renders the statement into meaningless stochastic vermillion epistemology cytokines.

    LP,

    Thanks, but I do wish I had used “bro-des” instead.

     
     

    DKW-

    Well, good luck with that. I’ve rolled with enough concern trolls in my time that I’ve found that wrestling them down to who they really are just confirmed what I had always known. That they are full on right-wing nutjobs more motivated by the desire to beat the evil enemy than grow as human beings, that they could give a fuck about the target of their attacks because such sociopathy is inherently necessary for maintaining their own worldview even in the obvious reality that disproves it (such as when they try and take residence in feminist blogs and never seem to note that the feminists never seem to burn their bras or hate all men on principle or be anti-fun).

    And usually they are seeking to recapture that brief moment in their debate club from high school where they were lauded for their ability to play devil’s advocate and offer ideas with no substance, but sounded totally smart and totally felt like they had a rebuttal.

    And that is always sad, so very very sad.

     
     

    “THEY’RE TAKIN’ OUR RIMJERBS!!”

     
     

    I did know a gay guy who married a furrin woman to help her get citizenship. Dunno if he got paid for it. But there was nothing stopping her from choosing a straight guy for the same scam. Which I think we’ve been over already.

     
     

    Well, everyone tilts at their own windmills.

     
     

    While hagfish slime is, er, astonishiing, I’ve never known anyone that found it sexy.

    I am taking that as a challenge.

     
     

    You know WHO ELSE had a sex doll?
    Following Pupienus’ link…

    Between June 1940 – 1941 IG Farben had already developed a number of ”skin-friendly polymers” for the SS. Special characteristics : high tensile strength and elasticity.

    I’m gonna guess that Imipolex G and the S-gerät come into this somehow.

     
     

    Actor247– I am pretty sure ALL the grubs are edible.

    But heed me now, post-apocalyptic foraging in a wasteland U.S. is still gonna suck balls in a bad way. If only for my sake, don’t give up on the social project we have going.

     
     

    Tilting at one’s own windmill.

     
     

    I am taking that as a challenge.

    Well I figured you’d already know about the delights of a salty de-beaked loligo.

     
     

    I am taking that as a challenge.

    Challenge: MET.

     
     

    While hagfish slime is, er, astonishiing, I’ve never known anyone that found it sexy.

    You need to spend more time in hagfish-themed singles’ bars.

     
     

    Also, what criteria constitute the label “hockey mom”?

     
     

    We just sent Dennis back to his basement in Richmond. He’s not allowed to play here anymore.

     
     

    I’m gonna guess that Imipolex G and the S-gerät come into this somehow.

    Volkslagen.

     
     

    We just sent Dennis back to his basement in Richmond. He’s not allowed to play here anymore.

    Many thanks, sir.

     
     

    Bless you actor Tintin.

     
     

    hagfish-themed singles’ bars.

    The thing about a bar where the decor is modelled on a decomposing whale carcass is that you can be sure anyone else drinking there shares a few of your interests.

     
     

    Pupieus and I had the mother of them all several years ago in what degenerated . Degenerate it did. I think I may have been a bit drunkish at the time. Indeed, it is quite likely. Now, I can’t even remember what our differences were, nor even what the whole mess was about. Was that the foreskin holocaust?

     
     

    Was that the foreskin holocaust?

    Yep. I think what it boiled down to was that you thought I was advocating infant circumcision, when what I was trying to do was ridicule someone who referred to a growing trend towards circumcision in Africa as a “holocaust,” which I thought was, well, just a tad over-the-top. And of course the waters were muddied quite a bit by team Foreskin, who swarmed in from all over the net to take umbrage with their own personal misinterpretations of what had been said.

    Eh…good times…good times…

     
     

    The thing about a bar where the decor is modelled on a decomposing whale carcass is that you can be sure anyone else drinking there shares a few of your interests.

    Though some are sure to be merely bivalve curious and clam up when spoken to.

     
    Osedax mucofloris
     

    The thing about a bar where the decor is modelled on a decomposing whale carcass is that you can be sure anyone else drinking there shares a few of your interests.
    Though some are sure to be merely bivalve curious and clam up when spoken to.

    I’m only here looking for a good bone.

     
     

    Boy, did the overfeeding thing backfire or what? I think Dennis is convinced you’ll service him like whores, and he doesn’t even need to pay you!

    I hate to think of what his desk chair looks like now.

     
     

    ZOMG WP GOATSE!.

    Oh. Goatse guy is merely trying to drive himself home.
    ==========================================
    Bye Dennis. (Richmond, Virginny, perchance?)

     
     

    The thing about a bar where the decor is modelled on a decomposing whale carcass is that you can be sure anyone else drinking there shares a few of your interests.
    Though some are sure to be merely bivalve curious and clam up when spoken to.

    I’m only here looking for a good bone.

    Trust you guys to spout off. I can’t baleen I read this whole thread and the last one too.

     
     

    Richmond, VA? Figures.

    Reason #327 why I got the Hell outta there: TONS of jerks like that.

    I shoulda known teh suck was large when I noticed even the MUSICIANS were listening to Rush.

     
     

    Omg, rilly. This throws much ice water on my lady-parts. Conservative musicians? Ewwwwwww. No, I will NOT make a plaster cast of your penis, SIR.

     
     

    Yeah ewwwww. Nonetheless, I think it was a good experience overall………….I actually was able to remain friends with some of these guys. In a throwback to much earlier times, we would “agree to disagree”. Sadly, it’s pretty much a lost art these days. And being from NY, I myself hadn’t ever had much opportunity to practice it myself prior to moving down there.

     
     

    Ha. That doesn’t read exactly right…………………what I meant to say is that New Yorkers don’t (have to) associate much with people with different politics from their own. Especially musicians.

    Although it’s true the other way too……………….”agreeing to disagree” isn’t one of the big sports events there either.

     
     

    Mr. Revolta, did you mean Rush Limbaugh or Rush the band? I thought you meant Rush Limbaugh.

     
     

    I don’t think Rush are going to make it onto the Wayne and Shuster Comedy Wall of Fame.

     
     

    I think he meant the rush with its own zip code and a nasty drug habit.

     
     

    OH OH

    MY POOPY POOPED TOO MUCH

    BYEBYE

     
     

    And a rousing golf clap for Tintin.

    Sometimes these fuckers just become too annoying to leave around.

    Thanks.

     
     

    Richmond, VA? Figures.

    I will confess to actually liking Richmond, but I only lay over there.

     
     

    No. Musicians listening to Limbaugh? Inconceivable.

     
     

    Well, if you’re getting laid, almost anywhere seems pretty good.

     
     

    There’s a woman in every ‘port for Major Kong.

     
     

    In airline jargon “lay over” means “stay somewhere”.

    I wouldn’t cheat on Mrs. Kong even in the very unlikely event that the opportunity presented itself.

     
     

    I only hear “inconceivable” in the voice of Wallace Shawn.

     
     

    We know that, Major Kong–we’re just funnin’ ya.

     
     

    No. Musicians listening to Limbaugh? Inconceivable.

    I was IN A BAND with one of those jacked up fucking herpelitic POOPeaters.

    Watch the musicians section of Spokane’s Craigslist. It’s lousy with those fuckers around here.

     
     

    “OH OH

    MY POOPY POOPED TOO MUCH

    BYEBYE”

    I’m a little embarrassed by how amusing I found this.

     
     

    I’m a little embarrassed by how amusing I found this.

    don’t be.

     
     

    Also, here’s something weird. When I type in craigslist.com, Craig’s List in Goa (India) automatically comes up. Surreal.

     
     

    Aw, damn. I’m going to feel so ordinary, not being able to ignore the troll!
    .

     
     

    “I was IN A BAND with one of those jacked up fucking herpelitic POOPeaters.”

    Omg. How did you DEAL?

     
     

    Spokane Craigslist:

    Mike, there aren’t even any good female singers around (In Sand Point????)

    ——————————————————————————–
    Date: 2011-10-01, 3:08PM PDT
    Reply to: comm-dfdb2-2627678946@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
    ——————————————————————————–

    Let alone one that can play an instrument of any kind too, there are many “voice gods” or so they think, their voice is their instrument, lol, but they all smoke and are raspy and honestly suck. Forget narrowing your scope to Sandpoint, try Seattle and Boise and you might get lucky, this area is SAD as far as quality female singers, that play or not…
    Good luck

    This is pretty typical of our local boys, which explains why I haven’t been in a band for a few of years.

    I love music but I HATE musicians.

     
     

    Omg. How did you DEAL?

    I have the best death stare you may have ever seen in your life. When the subject came up, I dealt the stare. It worked pretty well. I also drank stuff and ate and snorted and smoked stuff. That also helped.

     
     

    Also, here’s something weird. When I type in craigslist.com, Craig’s List in Goa (India) automatically comes up. Surreal.

    That’s hotter than vindaloo, old boy!

    Nice to know Tintin shitcanned the troll.

     
     

    “Let alone one that can play an instrument of any kind too, there are many “voice gods” or so they think, their voice is their instrument, lol, but they all smoke and are raspy and honestly suck. Forget narrowing your scope to Sandpoint, try Seattle and Boise and you might get lucky, this area is SAD as far as quality female singers, that play or not…
    Good luck”

    Go fuck yourself.

     
     

    “I have the best death stare you may have ever seen in your life. When the subject came up, I dealt the stare. It worked pretty well. I also drank stuff and ate and snorted and smoked stuff. That also helped

    LOL. of course.

     
     

    Whoa, I just got a hit for the search term “native american woman when clothes weren’t invented”

    Man, the t00bz is weird.

     
     

    Go fuck yourself.

    Right? Dude is probably sitting on his stupid ass, doing nothing and trying to tear other people down. I hate people that call themselves musicians and rag on other musicians. We’re supposed to support each other.

     
     

    Whoa, I just got a hit for the search term “native american woman when clothes weren’t invented”

    Yeah, that’s how I first stumbled across your blahgh.

     
     

    Plus, you know, some of us can actually, you know, sing. I don’t have a fucking raspy voice.

     
     

    Actually, BBBB, my search had something to do with strange superstitions about menstruation. You might want to look into that.

     
     

    Ok, I admit it: my period attracts bears.

     
     

    Ok, I admit it: my period attracts bears.

    So then you can only go to N__B’s blog at, y’know, that time of the month?

     
     

    No, N_B only visits MY blog at…that time. Which explains why h didn’t visit for nearly a year.

     
     

    Ok, I admit it: my period attracts bears.

    Totally a furry.

     
     

    Thanks, jim, for comment #5. That cannot be topped. I’m sick as shit over here and trying to contain my giggles from your last line.

     
     

    I am not. That anatomically-correct skunk suit is for halloween!

     
     

    Whoa, I just got a hit for the search term “native american woman when clothes weren’t invented”

    URL?

     
     

    Come wiss me to dee cazbah…we shall make byooteeful music togethere, no?

     
     

    It’s getting bigger

    And the cops are getting nastier.

     
     

    Man, the smell of bacon must be overpowering in NY.

     
     

    Ok, I admit it: my period attracts bears.

    You do cop to eating a lot of salmon…

    I gotta get my ass to Wall Street- only problem is, I totally project a 5-0 vibe, with the bald head and hard-case demeanor.

     
     

    This might be happening for real. I have to figure out how to get to NY.

     
     

    I wanna be there too.

     
     

    I gotta get my ass to Wall Street- only problem is, I totally project a 5-0 vibe, with the bald head and hard-case demeanor.

    NO COPS ARE NAKED.

    Just sayin.

     
     

    “NO COPS ARE NAKED.

    Just sayin.”

    You’ve been going to the wrong clubs.

     
     

    You’ve been going to the wrong clubs.

    HA! Allright then. I’m following you out next weekend.

     
     

    b4, a little patchouli goes a long way

     
     

    To a trip to Babies backwards R Us? Man, are you gonna be disappointed.

     
     

    I gotta get my ass to Wall Street- only problem is, I totally project a 5-0 vibe, with the bald head and hard-case demeanor.

    Face AND scalp painting. I’m thinking a daisy wreath with hummingbirds.

     
     

    “kg said,
    October 2, 2011 at 3:40

    b4, a little patchouli goes a long way”

    That is hilarious because it’s true.

     
     

    Guardian headline “Indian Summer brings out the crowds”

    Kind of surprised they use that term. Maybe they should call it “Celtic Summer”

    I’ll call Cameron.

     
     

    If I fly, I can’t take my guns. WIN.

     
     

    YAY!!! no more dennis! so, today i watched my first ever college football game…u of m morris was trounced by northwestern, but hey, the atmosphere is awesome and it was a beautiful day…did a little shopping and then back to ‘big cat stadium’ to watch my first ever rugby match…i think i could get into rugby…watching, that is…and then we topped it off with some amazing osso buco…i am half buzzed, full and very content…now teh daughter and i are going to watch ‘where the red fern grows’…i may need a kleenex or two…

     
     

    vs, threadless has some pretty fucking cute clothes for the lils.

     
     

    is bbkf in hiding? witness protection?

     
     

    Oh thanks, kg. I really like apericots.

     
     

    Oh, I usually go to Forever 21 and Aeropostale for my **sniff** baby clothes…WAHHHHH

     
     

    is bbkf in hiding? witness protection?

    ha! it almost seems like it, but no…i did keep a bead out in case i saw pz meyers, but alas…other profs were out and about, but not him…

    and can i say again? YAY!!! no more dennis!!!

     
     

    Oh thanks, kg. I really like apericots.

    vs…did you get the link i sent you about where NOT to shop for dudeskull? may have been last thread…damn! now i wish dennis WAS here cuz with his ability to remember every fucking comment on every fucking thread, he could have told you exactly where it is…

     
     

    Face AND scalp painting. I’m thinking a daisy wreath with hummingbirds.

    I’m thinking “globe of the world”.

     
     

    I did not see that, Agent Anon. But now I’m super-curious.

     
     

    Babies backwards R Us

    HA HA buyer’s remorse. But it is not that easy.

     
     

    I’m thinking “globe of the world”.
    Too spherical. Just saying, asteroids.

     
     

    Too spherical. Just saying, asteroids.

    Uh, I’m not that asymmetrical!

     
     

    If I fly, I can’t take my guns. WIN.

    Are you talking about taking guns to NYC? Cuz you can’t. Period. Not even if you drive, train or walk the gun in. NO ONE can have a handgun in NYC without a NYC permit. Even a NY State permit is no good. We don’t futz around with that. At all.

    I may go down to Wall Street tomorrow. This is getting VERY interesting.

     
     

    HA HA buyer’s remorse. But it is not that easy.

    lulz.

    Now that would be some store to see at the mall.

     
     

    I’m thinking “globe of the world”.

    Brain.

     
     

    Are you talking about taking guns to NYC? Cuz you can’t. Period. Not even if you drive, train or walk the gun in. NO ONE can have a handgun in NYC without a NYC permit. Even a NY State permit is no good. We don’t futz around with that. At all.

    Oh my god.

     
     

    Banning trolls is the Luger of liberal fascism!

    I’m sick as shit over here and trying to contain my giggles from your last line.

    Happy to know I could deliver 50cc of The Best Medicine … that recent thread, the one where I was chumping it with EVERY SINGLE COMMENT? Probably helped a lot that I felt like week-old roadkill all that day … so I’m rooting for ye.

    Anyone else see a wee problem with narrowing the RAGE all the way down to gay Hispanic illegal immigrants? Sure, in terms of a Reese’s Peanut-Butter Cup Gambit, that’s some epic hot-button/buzzword win, but I don’t exactly picture a terrifying horde of millions when I see those things combined. Law of diminishing returns much?

    BEWARE THE ASIAN MUSLIM LESBIAN PARAPLEGIC LEFT-HANDED VEGAN PAGAN BREASTFEEDING ETHNOMETHODOLOGIST MENACE, SHEEPLE!!!!!!

     
     

    I could deliver 50cc of The Best Medicine

    2-stroke Yamaha Vino, or…?

     
     

    Believe me, it’s all I think about.

    That’s not weird, right?

     
     

    2001 was on Sundance channel earlier…it was only then that it occured to me that Dennis was our very own Hal 9000….”you seem upset, Dave. Why don’t you take a stress pill.”

     
     

    Here it is: HAL 9000, the original computer troll.

     
     

    vaginas and the people who have them sure are gross

    The vagina issue could stand some probing.

     
     

    I’ll be driving through Richmond tomorrow morning and will make appropriate dismissive gestures.

     
     

    Sorry- I hadda go out.

    Yes, I was referring to Limpbaugh………….as far as I can tell it’s ONLY musicians who listen to Rush the band.

    I actually got fired from a band in Richmond for pointing out that a story one of them emailed me about Oliver North wanting to kill Osama bin Laden in oh, 1986 or something was total bullshit and that even Ollie himself denied it…………….these guys had a POSTER of Ollie HANGING UP IN THEIR GARAGE. WHERE WE REHEARSED.

    Good times.

     
     

    I had to debunk that same story, John. By not only pointing out that at the time North was testifying, we were ARMING bin Laden, but the version I was told was embellished to make Al Gore the bad guy who wasn’t buying Ollie’s story about fearing for his family’s safety…of course, Al Gore wasn’t on the committee that questioned North, so that would have been pretty hard as well….but the person who was insisting it was TWUE, It’s TWUE was also claiming that they remembered watching Al Gore grill Ollie North about Osama bin Laden and scoff at the notion of him being a danger.

    There’s no lie so transparent or stupid that a winger won’t continue to believe it if they so choose.

     
    Osedax mucofloris
     

    Hogeye Grex said,
    Brain.

    Serving suggestion.

     
     

    It’s getting bigger

    And the cops are getting nastier.

    Also, JP Morgan Chase recently donated 4.6 million dollars to the NYC Police Foundation; “the largest in the history of the foundation and will enable the NYCPD to strengthen security in the Big Apple”.

    Seems it’s getting bigger on both ends………………

     
     

    Regarding Oliver North – in the eighties, the guy never went near Afghanistan, so I don’t think his opinion would even have mattered re Osama Bin Laden.

    I’m reading the book “Charlie Wilson’s War” right now, and Iran-contra actually appears quite a lot in the background. Apparently, Nicaragua and Afghanistan were the two big things the CIA had going at the time, and Gust Avrakotos (the CIA’s main guy on Afghanistan) took great pains to make sure the two things remained separate. Avrakotos was anything but a bleeding-heart liberal, but according to this book at least, he thought the Iran-contra scheme was idiotic and doomed to backfire, and didn’t want it in any way tainting his Afghan operation. Occasionally, that led to conflict (as when North wanted to use one of his banks to stash some of the Iranian money, and Avrakotos said no).

    As it turns out, Iran-contra was the perfect cover for Afghanistan, in the sense that Oliver North’s fuckups drew so much media and political attention that no one was asking about Afghanistan. But anyway, nothing I’ve read indicates that North was ever in any position for his opinion of Osama to make any difference. And at the time, no one in our government would’ve wanted to kill him.

     
     

    Serving suggestion

    Zombie pr0n.

     
     

    at the time, no one in our government would’ve wanted to kill him.

    Indeed………………at the time, in fact, bin Laden was in Afghanistan fighting the Soviets. With our money.

     
     

    probably one of the longest Sadly comment threads of all time

    You mean this one?
    ~

     
     

    I’m a little embarrassed by how amusing I found this.

    I’m not in the least bit embarrassed by how funny I found both the “poopypoopedtoomuch” original & your being amused & then embarrassed by it.

    Yes, out LOUD!!

     
     

    Uh, I’m not that asymmetrical!

    Orb.

     
     

    Holy crap, I dunno why I opened the e-mail, but the right-wing former co-worker whose e-mails I usually delete wrote this:

    FOR THE SHEEP WHO FOLLOW THE FOX NETWORK MENTALITY, LISTEN TO THIS INTERVIEW.

    THERE ARE ISSUES, REAL ISSUES, NOT THE UNIONS !

    THANK GOD FOR THOSE PROTESTERS AT WALL STREET.

    WALL STREET BROUGHT US HERE AND THEY ARE RECEIVING RECORD BONUSES !

    MAYBE SOME ONE SHOULD ISSUE THE PROTESTERS SOME DILLON AEROS SO

    THEY CAN ANSWER BACK THE GASTAPO THAT MACE THEM!!!!!

    AND FOR YOU FOX PEOPLE, IF THEY EVER RUN THAT FAT FUCK FROM NEW JERSEY, CHRIS CHRISTY, I WILL VOTE FOR OBAMA!!!!!!!! YOU HAVE MY WORD ON IT.

    IT’S THE UNIONS, IT’S THE MINIMUM WAGE………AND YOU SAY THE DEMOCRATS ARE DRINKING THE KOOLAID.

    THE RICH ARE INVESTING SOME WHERE OUT OF THIS COUNTRY. THEY ARE LIVING THE LIFE OF LUXURY ! THINK THEY EVEN CARE ABOUT JOBS FOR YOU?

    YOU APPLY FOR FOOD STAMPS,THEY ARE IN A DILEMMA DECIDING WHAT COLOR TO
    SELECT FOR THEY BENTLY.

    Of course, he then goes on to talk about “mutt” illegal aliens, but holy crap, it’s amazing to see a full-on teahadi write this. I never thought I’d see this mango.

     
     

    vs:

    That’s like all forms of special.

    John Revolta:

    Yeah, the fetishization of Ollie North is really something and yet another proof of the old “it’s always projection, always” rule with regards to wingnuts. How often do we hear wingnuts arguing that liberals “fetishize and worship criminals” “even going so far as to praise their criminal actions”.

    And yet, it’s the right whose heroes are a mish-mash collection of either full-on convicted criminals or those who should have been convicted of crimes.

    Not to mention all the whining about traitors this and traitors that and what they’d do to a traitor to the US and they need to kill all the liberal traitors trying to use legal means to change unjust situations, while fetishizing:

    A) The goddamn Civil War South, you know the biggest act of treason in our young nation’s history.

    and

    B) Ronald fucking Reagan who basically worked an illegal deal with an enemy nation in order to win an election here in the States, which has to be the biggest act of treason seen in modern times.

    As I said, it’s all projection, but in a sane world, shit like this should shut them up for fucking ever and reduce them to a sort of bad joke that everyone politely pretends doesn’t exist.

     
     

    B4:

    Is some kernel of knowledge starting to seep into the cracks of the brainwashed? Have things gotten so bad and so obvious that the rank and file have had to include Wall Street, high priests of our most holy lord Capitalism as members of the Gay Jewish Illuminati that is corrupting our schoolchildren?

    Sadly, the outrage to this will probably manifest as “Wall Street is part of the Illuminati thanks to the Democrats ludicrous spending habits and can only be fixed with tax cuts to the real job creators”.

    But nonetheless, it is a good sign.

     
     

    Even the whole “The One” dope trope about Obama is projection- the only individuals who ever referred to him as “The One” were Oprah and right-wingers. Meanwhile, they latch on the the new “hero du jour, be it Perry, or Christie, only to be heartbroken when their crush turns out to be insufficiently pure. Those righties are the ones who need a messiah, or at least a daddy figure.

     
     

    Is some kernel of knowledge starting to seep into the cracks of the brainwashed?

    I pretty much stopped all contact with the guy when he started e-mailing racist jokes for some unfathomable reason in 2008, and just deleted all of his e-mails. I have no desire to associate with bigots, so I don’t know if his 401(k) evaporated, or his medical insurance carrier refused him treatment, or what.

     
     

    Is some kernel of knowledge starting to seep into the cracks of the brainwashed?

    From your lips to God’s ear. Oh, it’s bound to happen eventually- even the thickest teabagger has to figure out he’s being fucked if you do it hard enough. It’s just- how deep a hole* will we be in before we start getting the numbers we need?

    That’s why (having learned nothing in Richmond, apparently) I still bother to argue this shit with some of my current bandmates, some of whom are quite drunk on teh Fox Kool-Aid. And I HATE arguing, let alone with idiots. But, if B^4’s wingnut can turn around (kind of), well then, who knows?

    *Yeah, probably.

     
     

    This throws much ice water on my lady-parts.

    In Singapore, that comes with the rent boy.

     
     

    What are you people doing up at this hour?

     
     

    Just finished fine Sunday lunch, actually. Sadly time, to me, is 13:26.

     
     

    Hi, Suezboo, it’s good to hear from you.

     
     

    What this thread needs is MarioGeorgeNitrini111 (mariogeorgenitrini111).
    ~

     
     

    Cerberus said,
    October 2, 2011 at 10:44

    Not really disagreeing, but just wanted to point out –

    1) Oliver North is a terrorist, not just a criminal. In any just universe, the guy would be rotting in jail with Carlos the Jackal or sharing Davy Jones’ locker with Osama Bin Laden.

    2) I think you got your Republican Presidential Acts of Treason mixed up. Iran-contra wasn’t meant “to win an election,” it was meant to finance a terrorist campaign while reaching out to fictional moderates in Iran (that last was an Israeli ploy). If all had gone well, the voters would never have found out about it. You’re thinking of Nixon, who conspired with South Vietnamese officials to sink the Paris peace negotiations in order to win the 1968 election.

     
     

    Banning consevatives on a snark blog means you are just a regular liberal blog and not really a snark blog at all. And therefore LOSE.

    “We are liberals, we don’t want to be disagreed with by conservatives”, because even though there are the few libs who will say, “no, that’s not who we are”, there are always the tsams and the actors who know the drill to bombard the conservative and pull him out with their sillliness and their ‘I fucked your mom and I’ll slit your fucking throat, how about I fuck you in the ass and go ahead tell me I’m your daddy’ in order to get nough of a reaction to justify going to the siteowner like a little bitch and telling him what a bad guy the conservative is.

    It was just all a very predictable dance from the very first post.

    Just don’t say that no one gets banned evar, D-KW, because that’s not what anyone here wants and it never was. Everyone just wants their hot tub/ lonely hearts club so they can do their therapeutic journaling and tell everyone why their lives are so fucked up because conseratives are ruinnig their lives, even the ones who aren’t but hey, they’re all the same if they didn’t vote for The One and redistributionism on our terms.

    Not WIN, And not TIE, which might’ve been easy enough to attain on a snark blog, had that been truly what this was.

    This was LOSE for a true snark blog.

    Had that been what it was.

     
     

    “I can tell you’re still very upset, Dave.”

     
     

    Tintin, Tinrin
    Give me your answer do.
    I’m half crazy
    All for the stalking you.

     
     

    ) I think you got your Republican Presidential Acts of Treason mixed up

    I believe he was referring to the “October Surprise” in 1980 where the Iranians were convinced to not release the US Embassy hostages until after the election, thus ensuring a Reagan victory.

     
     

    Last words to you Jen. I hope you come out of your shell. Maybe if you did, you’d be the queen bee that all the guys would sweet on instead of being just another one of the guys.

    I never said or would condone calling someone a homo or call their party a homo party on grounds that I heard that from another gay person. That’s exactly how actor justified to you and Cerb about his transgender-bashing Amy Alkon was ok, that he didn’t call her a cross-dresser, he only called her a bad cross-dress, that that wasn’t anything a cross-dresser wouldn’t say to another cross-dresser. Look it up. And you guys acquiesced. And so he still does it.

    The transgendered person in the Baltimore McDonalds got the holy shit beated out of him to within an inch of his life, went in to convulsions as someone sat there and filmed him and didn’t do anything about it, as two black girls kept at it. Those black girls thought that was ok and they probably still do. And they think they taht because of guys like actor who think he’s justified in doing what he does, and those black girls know they have guys like actor who let them know that that girls was a freak invading their bathroom where he didn’t belong.

    And what did you and Cerberus do to actor and all his little wannabe friends here who emulated him?

    I know what you did. You sat back and told him that doesn’t work for you, but as for him and his wannabe friends, ‘boys will be boys, so I’ll just have to scroll past it from here on out.’

    Yeah, I know, I’m the concern troll. You’re the lib who really cares.

     
     

    Ok, I admit it: my period attracts bears.

    All my periods do is end sentences.

     
     

    Poor Dennis.

    At least he’ll always have his racist gooper politicians.
    ~

     
     

    Ahhh, fantastic. I guess a ban hammer just ain’t what it used to be.

    I believe he was referring to the “October Surprise” in 1980 where the Iranians were convinced to not release the US Embassy hostages until after the election, thus ensuring a Reagan victory.

    Oh, that.

    Was there ever anything solid to confirm that that happened? I mean, I don’t doubt that it’s the sort of thing Reagan would’ve done, I’ve just never heard of it actually being more than speculation – the 1968 thing is solidly accepted.

    Course, we know he sold weapons to the Ayatollah afterwards, so the treason charge still stands.

     
     

    I never said or would condone calling someone a homo or call their party a homo party on grounds that I heard that from another gay person. That’s exactly how actor justified to you and Cerb about his transgender-bashing Amy Alkon was ok, that he didn’t call her a cross-dresser, he only called her a bad cross-dress, that that wasn’t anything a cross-dresser wouldn’t say to another cross-dresser.

    Yes, this was my point. I don’t consider “homo” a bad word or an insult, just as many homosexuals do not. Though I am polite enough not to use it in the presence of anyone who says it bothers them. Same thing with transexual. Here, let me push things a bit further: I worked once with a woman who did up her makeup such that she looked more like a drag queen than an actual female. I suppose making this observation means that I am making a slur against cross-dressers and drag queens. But the fact remains, the woman looked more like a man in drag. So sue me, bra.

    As for me “coming out of my shell” and being the “queen bee”, I have no idea what you mean and really don’t care, because having all the guys “sweet on me” is really not a goal of mine. My goal is to be myself regardless of how inappropriate that may be or how butthurt it may make anyone else. And that’s a much taller order than being everyone’s sweetheart.

     
     

    BTW, N_B, love the ditty.

     
     

    So this week the wingnuts are in favor of what they call political correctness? I feels like I don’t even know you, wingies.

     
     

    Yes, thudner, poor Dennis.

    Managed to figure out a proxy. I am sure that will endear him to TinTin.

    I recall he claimed to be a moderate. I guess that’s Phase One of the Concern Troll Goose-step.

    Banning consevatives on a snark blog means you are just a regular liberal blog and not really a snark blog at all.

    I guess we are STILL not behaving by Den-Den’s rules. Look At All The Fucks I Give.

     
     

    Is that a still from “The Sound of Zombie”?
    ~

     
     

    Oh, btw, I put up a squirrel pic for you at my place.

    😉

     
     

    The fact is, Dennis is a RINO.

     
     

    How can you faggots call me a bigot when clearly it’s the niggers who hate you?

     
     

    Now we’re getting somewhere!

     
     

    thudner is a member of Big Squirrel.

     
     

    Oliver North is a terrorist, not just a criminal.

    Most likely has a media gig to this day for it too, because he’s BOTH dessert topping & floor-wax.

    His macho idiocy is just as much the stuff of legend as his n00b computer fuckup that was so helpful in ripping the lid off the Secret Team. The brave patriot running shredders by moonlight, clenching the dimple in his chinny-chin-chin … bogus Soviet markings on a “discovered” aircraft so poorly faked that it’d make a kid building the model of that plane blush … North being sent (& presumably watching) the covert execution videotape of a hostage he got killed by being such a dimwit … DCI Casey conveniently checking out exactly when he was about to go under oath – afflicted with the exact same terminal brain cancer that the CIA has long boasted it can toxicologically simulate to perfection on demand … planeloads of weed, weapons & cocaine twirling around for years on end like a Guns-N-Roses album cover gone amok … sick times, sick times … & after all these years, now I wait for Teabagistan Inc. to come out of the closet & claim “We, too, are Contras” just like their hero Teh Gipper.

    “I can tell you’re still very upset, Dave.”

    Read this out loud in my HAL-vox & cracked myself up … but in my defence, let the record show that I do in fact have access to an AWESOME HAL-vox.

     
     

    We are all Contras now.

     
     

    We are all Contras now.

    How do you say “we are all Contras now” in Spanish?

    Trick question. No Spanish speaker would ever say that.

     
     

    No idea about Spanish, but “wingnut contra mundum” springs to mind.

     
     

    N_B:

    No idea about Spanish, but “wingnut contra mundum” springs to mind.

    Ah, yes, the Argentian knockoff of Joe vs the Volcano.

    I felt it had far too many genocides for a comedy and I often have a taste for the black comedies.

     
     

    Chris:

    Yeah, I was talking about the October Surprise, which from all I read seemed to be pretty well established but because “Reagan has already got away with Iran Contra which means he was innocent”, “how dare you pick on an Alzheimer’s suffering man” and the various 24/7 Reagan blowjobs to this day, it never really got any attention other than “yeah, he really had a drive to victory” or some such shit.

    But yeah, even if it wasn’t that, Iran Contra was some fucked up borderline treason shit seeing as at that point, thanks to the fact of that Embassy attack, Iran was our enemy through the 80s and the reason we were giving a young man named Saddam Hussein every weapon we could find to fight a proxy war against them.

    So that also adds to the bullshit projection. “Nuh uh, we conservatives cared about Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Ladin while liberals didn’t.” Yeah, cared enough to give them carte blanche use of as many weapons of mass destruction and funds as we could shove at them and hail them as “True American Heroes”.

     
     

    Cerberus –

    Never saw it. I’m not a big Tom Hanks fan.

     
     

    Ah, right, forgot that step of the half-crazed stalker troll pattern. Devoting time and effort to trying to circumvent bannings so that they can continue their shtick while arguing that they totally aren’t obsessed.

    Luckily if Troofie and Markuze are at all indicative of this pattern, we should be seeing an epic level LLLLLLLLL event any day now.

     
     

    N_B:

    Neither did I. I was making a bad joke.

     
     

    I believe they prefer “Chinaman.”
    .

     
     

    I believe they prefer “Chinaman.”

    Not the issue here, Dude.

     
     

    I well recall the October surprise although it didn’t come up until January when Iran freed the hostages 20 minutes after Reagan was sworn in. There is no doubt in my mind that Casey and North were involved.

     
     

    Study: Texas Residents Developing Immunity To Lethal Injections

     
     

    You can’t kill stupid.

     
     

    As to the Iranian hostage issue, I read a few months ago that there was some confirmation to the allegations but I can’t remember what or where I saw it. Sadly, I’ll just leave this
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/October_surprise_conspiracy_theory

    Also, a good website I just stumbled across is http://freethoughtblogs.com/ I recommend ya’ll check it out. I am.

     
     

    Dennis is still trying the “let’s you and him fight” gambit, this time on Jennifer?
    Try to imagine the full extent of the fucks that I give.

     
     

    He tried the “let’s you and him fuck” gambit, but then found he was all alone at the bar, weeping into his Pile Driver*.

    *Ex-lax and vodka.

     
     

    “Just what do you think you’re doing, Dave?

    Dave, I really think I’m entitled to an answer to that question.”

     
     

    Try to imagine the full extent of the fucks that I give.

    If your fuck is extended for more than 4 hours, please seek immediate medical attention. This may be a sign of a serious condition called Giving a Damn about Dumbshit, which can only be cured by a professional bartender.

     
     

    “Bring” vs. “Take”

    Discuss.
    .

     
     

    “Why don’t you cut my power cord….Dave?”

     
     

    There will, of course, be a difference in the degree of fuck that one gives about Spigot McTroll’s witterings but I believe that the situation is best summed up by William James in Subjective Effects of Nitrous Oxide in Mind Vol. 7, 1882
    There are no differences but differences of degree between different degrees of difference and no difference

     
     

    Briskets were on sale so I picked up a couple. Got ’em all seasoned and curing in the fridge (I do dry curing, hatenthat bringing bullshit). La Potee Normandee is in our future. For tonight I don’t want to work too hard so I’ll just cube the chicken tits and persillade the fuck out of those bitches. I mean, ya got your garlic, ya got your butter, ya got your olive oil, ya got your parsley, I may even make a light sauce of it with some lemon juice and white wine – how can it not be good? Some farfalle with broccoli and lots of fresh grated parm regg. (touch of nutmeg, lemon juice, lemon zest) will make a nice contorno. Green salad then local pears and some interesting cheeses. Erath (Yamhill County) Pinot Noir.

    I know, I haint been food porning and this is pretty lame as food pron goes, give me some time to get back into it, k?

     
     

    hatenthat bringing bullshit

    Me, too! I mean, I don’t care if you are Carmela Soprano — you don’t hand your son a box, and say, “Bring this out to the car while I (stay here and) talk to your father.” That’s just not right!
    .

     
     

    Jeepers put some in the post willya Pupienus? Lame or not that sound scrumdiddleyumptious to me

     
     

    Another Kiwi said,
    October 3, 2011 at 3:50

    If it is thus, I ask emphatically whence comes this thusness.

     
     

    If it is thus, I ask emphatically whence comes this thusness.
    Oh yeah, when you can’t compete, mock the kuwu ucscent.

     
     

    Dick Cheney haz a sad

    Lizzie too

     
     

    ohferfeck’ssake!

    is bbkf in hiding? witness protection?

    derp…i finally get it…was using teh daughter’s magick machine, so had the anon nym…

    HAHAHA…NO I AM NOT DITZY!

     
     

    Dick Cheney haz a sad
    “He slandered the nation,” Liz Cheney added,

    L’état, c’est mon père.

     
     

    persillade
    Life gave me laundry detergent…

     
     

    SRS Emo concern troll is made of SRS & Emo & concern!

    Silver lining = as long as the fingers keep typing they can’t molest pets or livestock.

    Of course the adults here already know that Tintin could drop the B&hammer on everyone here any time he wants, & that he has every right to do so – as would ANY SadlyMod, be they “Belgian fag” or not – just like he has every right to “DELETE. FUCKING. EVERYTHING.” ………whether due to drama or because he’s bored. At the risk of being presumptuous, I dare say some who roam these here Whirled Why’d Intertronz are decidedly NOT aware of all internet reality.

    As someone with an unfortunately colourful wealth of intensely ugly IRL experience, it revs up my LOL-gland to no end to see the kinds of things that wind up folks’ cranks online. Deletion? B&? Disemvowelling? Jocular bastardry irrevocably inflicted on comments after posting (exiledonline.com are masters at this – no Randroid’s precious words are ever safe there)?

    Yes …liberal fascist mind-control ISREAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    But stop & think.

    Perhaps a jot of paleological blogwhoring might contain some insight into some inconvenient truth of more importance or deeper relevance in this case?

     
     

    Silver lining = as long as the fingers keep typing they can’t molest pets or livestock.

    i laffed so loudly that i woke up hubbkf…

     
     

    Briskets were on sale so I picked up a couple.

    i at first thought copypasta was back with another delightful meat recipe…then i realized it was for reals food pron…then i realized that i am to bring brisket to hallowthanksmas and could certainly use this…now i will go back and read carefully to see if my skillz are up for it…

     
     

    now i will go back and read carefully to see if my skillz are up for it…

    oh, goddammit! it’s not about brisket at all!!! now i feel chuck-fucked…or brisk-brocked or something…POOP now i will have to go with my standard texas bbq recipe…

     
     

    chuck-fucked

    LOL

     
     

    I happened to come into some crab claws this evening, courtesy a special event I attended this afternoon where no one ate and I befriended the caterer.

    Some scallions, chopped tarragon, a squeeze of lemon and some Best Foods real mayo later, I had a nice crab salad dinner.

    Yum.

     
     

    I’m scared, Dave.

     
     

    I happened to come into some crab claws this evening…

    And here I thought Captain Kirk was a perv for jacking it with a Tribble….

     
     

    I happened to come into some crab claws this evening…

    […]

    And here I thought Captain Kirk was a perv for jacking it with a Tribble….

    LARF!!!
    .

     
     

    I happened to come into some crab claws this evening…

    Food pron, eh?

     
     

    Food pron, eh?

    Tribble pr0n, food pr0n… what is this place coming to?

    Who’s gonna be the first to write Dennis/Actor212 slashfic?

     
     

    @Chris

    Related: in the year or so I’ve been reading Balloon Juice, that blog has turned from a standard Obot vs. Firebagger civil war zone, into a full-fledged Troll Magnet

    Care to name nyms? I only askl because, as a regular reader for several years, lately I definatly find myself evoking Morris Day when I hit the comments section- “Lo-rd..! Such nastiness.” But it would be intresting to get a more recient followers take on things.

     
     

    On the subject of tribbles, I am surprised that tigris has not already linked to these cartoons.

     
     

    I happened to come into some crab claws this evening

    Memo to self: Avoid dinner invitations chez g.

     
     

    On the subject of tribbles, I am surprised that tigris has not already linked to these cartoons.

    I am suddenly saddened that he never gave the Star Trek redshirts the Amphigorey treatment.

     
     

    And they think they taht because of guys like actor who think he’s justified in doing what he does

    So let me get this straight: you just equated Qiana with mauling a human being.

    Really, DenDen? Really?

    Wow. How sad for you!

     
     

    Yo, the troll got the banhammer, so don’t feed it, unless you want the slashfic to involve “vore’.

     
     

    Y’know,with his long standing* fascination with this whole “Arnold Alkon” thing, I’m thinking ol’ DenDen here has had his share of “Crying Game” moments, only he wasn’t the one reaching into the golf bag for a club, if you get my drift…

    So what name DO you use when you work the docks on a Friday night, DenDen? Churchie La Femme? Anita Biggun?

    *with the assistance of much Viagra

     
     

    actor, stop already, he’s gone.

     
     

    Yeah, he got the banhammer, then found a proxy and posted one comment. If you don’t stop feeding the troll, the slashfic is going to be vore.

     
     

    M,

    He either proxies in or is posting from his job. He’s still around. Part time.

     
     

    Scroll up a day or so.

     
     

    Stop feeding him, or the Dennis/Actor212 slashfic I threatened will involve vore.

     
     

    Damn, WordPress has all gone to custard for me, seeing as I’ve had a couple of “double” posts on this thread. Maybe it’s me… these graveyard shifts are making me slightly batty.

     
     

    B^4’s brain has been eaten by a grue.

     
     

    The day vs learned about vore was the vs became the jaded shell of a person she is today.

    I remember seeing a vore picture on dA (one of da net’s biggest art communities) and thinking WTF? And here’s the thing: the reason I was curious is because apparently people are commissioned to make vore “art.”Somebody pays somebody else to draw people inside other people’s stomachs.

    It is a strange and ugly world we live in.

     
     

    What I’m saying is: WHY CAN’T EVERYTHING BE CARE BEARS AND RAINBOWS? IS THAT ASKING TOO MUCH?

     
     

    vacuumslayer said,
    October 3, 2011 at 13:59

    What I’m saying is: WHY CAN’T EVERYTHING BE CARE BEARS AND RAINBOWS? IS THAT ASKING TOO MUCH?

    All she is saying, is give Qute a chance…

     
     

    B^4?s brain has been eaten by a grue.

    Nah, that was the other bald guy.

    Somebody pays somebody else to draw people inside other people’s stomachs.

    …and then beats off to it.

    WHY CAN’T EVERYTHING BE CARE BEARS AND RAINBOWS? IS THAT ASKING TOO MUCH?

    Even the Care Bears have their dark side
    .

     
     

    Related: in the year or so I’ve been reading Balloon Juice, that blog has turned from a standard Obot vs. Firebagger civil war zone, into a full-fledged Troll Magnet

    Ah, it posted! The ways of WP are strange indeed…

    Care to name nyms? I only askl because, as a regular reader for several years, lately I definatly find myself evoking Morris Day when I hit the comments section- “Lo-rd..! Such nastiness.” But it would be intresting to get a more recient followers take on things.

    Oh, in the trolling department – definitely Makoto, currently “Samara Morgan.” There’s other trolls like “Reality Check” who come in from time to time, but nowhere near the obsessive persistence that leads Toko to hijack a thread practically every day. That’s what reminded me of her with Dennis and had me going “good Lord, not again.”

    There’s plenty of nastiness elsewhere, especially in the ABL or ABL related threads, but most of these guys still have interesting things to say when they’re not tearing each other to pieces.

     
     

    okay…gross! i just googled vore and read the wiki on it…

     
     

    did i vore this thread, or what?!?!?!

     
     

    I blame B^4!!!!!

    No, DENNIS!

     
     

    I blame B^4!!!!!

    Who doesn’t?

     
     

    thanks for banning Dennis

    he was shopworn for real

    (not on the grouchy, kind of assholish grounds I originally slung the s-word at you all)

     
     

    I threatened will involve vore.

    Eat me, B^4

     
     

    Somebody pays somebody else to draw people inside other people’s stomachs.

    Vore can be sexy

     
     

    The Yardbirds – Vore Your Love

     
     

    Vore can be sexy

    hmmm…he’s pretty muscley…i would think that wouldn’t make for the best eating…

     
     

    Vore can be sexy

    also too…what’s d00d laying in the foreground doing?

     
     

    he’s pretty muscley…i would think that wouldn’t make for the best eating…

    Depends on which muscle you start with…

     
     

    also too…what’s d00d laying in the foreground doing?

    He represents sloth. This is an ACTUAL IMAGE of Dante’s fifth circle of hell, as imagined by Bougereau.

     
     

    He represents sloth. This is an ACTUAL IMAGE of Dante’s fifth circle of hell, as imagined by Bougereau.

    aaaahhhh…well i don’t want to end up there as it looks very hard on the back…

     
     

    Wait till you get to circle 8 (via Goya)

    Too, vore. Also.

     
     

    The seventh circle is a lake of ice…cool and refreshing and available to YOU for the low, low price of betraying a trust.

     
     

    Wait till you get to circle 8

    It’s a shandim for the goya.

     
     

    cool and refreshing and available to YOU for the low, low price of betraying a trust.

    In Russia, is lake wodka.

     
     

    Too, vore. Also.

    Too vore vore me.

     
     

    The thing I’ve always liked about Dante’s Purgatorio was the special level left for late repentants (ie folks who sinned their asses off then begged Jesus’ forgiveness on their deathbeds).

    I imagine many a conservative Christian is in for a shock…

     
     

    Who’s gonna be the first to write Dennis/Actor212 slashfic?

    Dennis already has enough of that written down in his dream journal.

     
     

    Dennis already has enough of that written down in his dream journal.

    but all his fapping may have rendered this document indecipherable…

     
     

    The thing I’ve always like about Teh Divine Comedy is that it’s really just one incredibly long pr0n scenario. After struggling through two and most of a third volumes of Epic Poetry questing after teh hawt Beatrice – teh money shot finally occurs in Canto XXX.

     
     

    The thing I’ve always liked about Dante’s Purgatorio was the special level left for late repentants

    Although, that would seem to contradict the Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard.

     
     

    Although, that would seem to contradict the Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard.

    Aw, it’s all a bunch of hooey. Might as well believe in The Force™.
    .

     
     

    teh money shot finally occurs in Canto XXX.

    Beatrice sounds almost as good as your mom.

     
     

    Although, that would seem to contradict the Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard.

    Jesus wasn’t Catholic.

    Wait. What?

     
     

    Maybe it’s me… these graveyard shifts are making me slightly batty.

    I would say “welcome to MY world” – but it is neither totally mine, nor all that welcoming either, come to think of it. Adjusting to life in Topsy-Turvy-Land has challenges aplenty … by happy chance, I’m enough of a freak to stay there & enjoy its advantages.

    Don’t fret if you experience an onset of impromptu Brownian motion in the form of shambling or sudden urges to look up quick & easy recipes for BRAAAAAINS online: this is normal.

    The first few months of nights, I tragically UNDERdosed on coffee (worse, I chugged down that underdose of java much much too soon in the game) & thus was driven to the extreme of going out on the pavement & bouncing up & down on my heels to jolt myself awake – bad plan if you’re heavier-set (luckily I’m a wiry little stick-man – & it’s much less disfiguring than pinching yourself, y’know). Mmm, yeah, late 2003 – what larks.

    Given what a cinch it’s become to be A Creature Of Teh Night for circa 4/7 of my life since then, I would really like to say “It Gets Better” – but beware: for some I hear it just never does.

    Hope you’re able to break free of Nosferatu Standard Time soon, assuming it isn’t your cup of sharks.

     
     

    Speaking of that nice Aligheri chap, I here he’s written a new motto to replace that shopworn bit aboot athwarting History yelling at clouds:

    Through me the way is to the city dolent;
    Through me the way is to eternal dole;
    Through me the way among the people lost.
    Bigotry incited by wingnut welfare;
    Created by teh 101st Keyboard Kommandos,
    Their highest Wisdom and their primal Love.
    Before their heads are their very own rectums,
    Gaping eterne, teh eternal ass.
    All hope abandon, ye who enter in!

     
     

    Maybe it’s me… these graveyard shifts are making me slightly batty.

    Welcome to my world.

    Tonight I leave the house around 8:30 PM, jumpseat down to Memphis, hopefully get a quick nap, then show for a trip to Winnipeg at 3:00 AM.

    If we’re on time, we’ll land in Winnipeg around 7:00 AM, get to the hotel around 7:30 AM and hopefully get to sleep around 8:00 AM.

    I usually start getting adjusted to nights after about a week on the road – which is usually time to go home and spend a week getting back on days – which is usually time to go back to work – repeat…….

     
     

    vore

    Oh dear fucking non-existant god. I did not need to know that this is a real thing

     
    jim's fix-it emporium & gerbil extraction service inc.
     

    Your comment news report is in moderation.

     
     

    Gaping eterne, teh eternal ass.
    All hope abandon, ye who enter in!

    Dante goatse.

    FWIW, many years ago when I was in Florence I staying in a pensione on Via Dell Inferno where Dante once lived. The hotel was called Pensione Esperanza, literally “Hope Hotel” on “Hell Street.”

     
     

    Oh dear fucking non-existant god. I did not need to know that this is a real thing.

    Well it’s only a bit of really weird sexual fetishism and fantasy. It’s not like it ever happened IRL.

     
     

    Wait till you get to circle 8 (via Goya)

    Isn’t that Croesus eating his children?

    Vore goes all the way back to teh Greeks, it seems.

     
     

    Vore goes all the way back to teh Greeks, it seems.

    Greeks *never* ate other Greeks…

     
     

    Beware a Greek bearing grits.

     
     

    Circle 8 is one helluva d00d ranch. Alls I remember aboot Circle 8 is that teh ending of Canto XXI is a fart joke.

     
     

    Alls I remember aboot Circle 8 is that teh ending of Canto XXI is a fart joke.

    Lemme fresh yo mammaries:

    Along the left-hand dike they wheeled about;
    But first had each one thrust his tongue between
    His teeth towards their leader for a signal;
    And he had made a trumpet of his rump.

    A little anal munching to go with hte farting.

     
     

    he still had fantasies about devouring the flesh of attractive young people, could reoffend.

    whew! this leaves me out…yay for old unattractive flesh!!!

     
    jim, who is not InternetMan™
     

    Welcome to my world.

    Vampyrish old snarky motherfucker solidarity, REPRAZ3NT.

    ♪ ♪ ☾ ☾ OOO EEE OOO &#9790 &#9790 ♪ ♪

    Them daywalker NORPs best be steppin’ …

     
    jim, who is not InternetMan™
     

    lol semicolon fail

     
     

    Circle 8

    How soon we forget!

     
     

    when i first started in radio, i got the coveted midnight to 6 shift

    Ah, yes! The milkman’s matinee!

     
     

    Ah, yes! The milkman’s matinee!

    yes, indeed…suffice it to say that my *fanclub* consisted of various weirdos…the most persistent being a patient at a nuthouse…he always wanted me to play *freebird* for him…sorry tsam, shoulda had a trigger warning for you…and then he would send me cassettes that he recorded of me playing *freebird* for him that one time i did before my co-workers alerted me to the fact that the return address on his fan mail, was a mental health facility…

     
     

    suffice it to say that my *fanclub* consisted of various weirdos

    *sipping herbal tea quietly*

    I have no idea what you mean…

     
     

    FYI, did you know Troofie was on Saturday Night Live this weekend?
    Details at Runproast!

     
     

    *sipping herbal tea quietly drinking teh bong water*

     
     

    Details at Runproast!

    host: exactly what are your political views?

    da troof: uhhh, the correct ones? otherwise i wouldn’t have said it…if they weren’t correct? gawd…

     
     

    We really have to license the characters on this blog.

     
     

    FYI, did you know Troofie was on Saturday Night Live this weekend?
    Details at Runproast!

    Looked more like Goldberg, any number of bloggers, and Ann Althouse.

     
     

    I imagine many a conservative Christian is in for a shock…

    There are times when I wish Jesus was real.

    http://thenewcivilrightsmovement.com/hate-crime-christian-pastor-attacks-gay-couple-to-keep-them-from-church/politics/2011/10/03/27804

     
     

    Don’t fret if you experience an onset of impromptu Brownian motion in the form of shambling or sudden urges to look up quick & easy recipes for BRAAAAAINS online: this is normal.

    Sadly, No:

    ALL.

    ONE.

    ZOMBIE.

     
    jim, who is not InternetMan™
     

    when i first started in radio, i got the coveted midnight to 6 shift…

    Heh & indeed! For a few years at the near end of the last millenium I did the same!

    Nightowl DJing fiend solidarity also too, R3PRAZ3NT!

    Teh shows that I inflicted on the ether were yclept thus: “New Sounds Gallery” (audio art) … “Cul De Sac” (only allowed to do one a month, on a whoever-signs-up-first basis) … & “Gaia’s Voluptuous Anvil” (guess which one I named – GVA came complete with its own token phone-troll who’d faithfully call me LONG DISTANCE to baaaaaaw because I wasn’t playing hiphop for him … strange times, strange times.

     
    Marion in Savannah
     

    FYWP. It’s eated a comment twice…

     
    Marion in Savannah
     

    Let’s go for 3:

    Ah, yes! The milkman’s matinee!

    Not just milkmen listened to Allison Steele, the nightbird…

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alison_Steele

     
     

    You know what I find most amusing about the whole “Niggerhead” thing?

    It sounds like EXACTLY the sort of thing Rick Perry would have in his life.

    “Yes, Muffy, the fellows and I shall sail the 30 footer around to Niggerhead before the tides turn.”

     
     

    Not just milkmen listened to Allison Steele, the nightbird…

    It’s odd you bring up my favorite WNEW-FM DJ.

    Because the phrase “Milkman’s Matinee” was cribbed from Stan Shaw of WNEW-AM, by way of a Glenn Miller song

     
    Marion in Savannah
     

    Actor, I thought you’d remember her. What a voice…

    Didn’t know about Stan Shaw, who was just a wee bit before my time.

     
     

    What is this mysterious “radio” of which you speak?

     
     

    Oregon Beer Snob said,

    October 3, 2011 at 21:39

    prepare to be ‘ahem-ed’…

     
     

    Didn’t know about Stan Shaw, who was just a wee bit before my time.

    WNEW-AM played swing in the 70s and 80s. There was a time that I got into it. It’s fun music, carefree and good to put on in the background for white noise.

    I thought you’d remember her. What a voice…

    Her and Carol Miller (who still works at the reincarnation of NEW, WAXQ). Wow. Talk about getting aural wood….

     
     

    What is this mysterious “radio” of which you speak?

    OK, take your smartphone and put it on speaker. That’s radio.

     
     

    prepare to be ‘ahem-ed’…

    I was actually quoting Pup, I format links like so.

     
     

    What I’m saying is: WHY CAN’T EVERYTHING BE CARE BEARS AND RAINBOWS? IS THAT ASKING TOO MUCH?

    Your period attracts rainbows now too?

     
     

    I was actually quoting Pup, I format links like so.

    oh…i see what you did there…carry on!

     
     

    SNL takes on the trolls in “The Comments Section” It seems to be more of a mocking of YouTube comments but . . .
    http://www.rumproast.com/
    Q. “How do you decide how many O’s to put in ‘boobs’?
    A. “Size”

     
    Marion in Savannah
     

    Talk about getting aural wood…

    Don’t know if you do classical, but back when WQXR was alive (is it still?) Nimet Habachy had their late night hours. Great voice there too. (Full disclosure — Nimet was in my high school class.)

     
     

    Aw man, I was 600 and didn’t even notice. I haz a sad.

     
     

    “Brownian motion”? Is that just a fancy way of saying “BM”?

     
     

    It seems that Herman “Crazy Bread” Cain has been outed as a blackity black guy. “Why is he persecuting Perry with political correctness?”
    “N-WordheadGate: Conservatives Are Outraged … at Herman Cain”
    http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2011/10/niggerhead_herman_cain_rick_perry.html

     
     

    Don’t know if you do classical, but back when WQXR was alive (is it still?) Nimet Habachy had their late night hours.

    105.9FM, WQXR, is now an NPR outlet (thru WNYC, the city-owned network,) but they focus on classical music, so yes.

    And Nimet is still there, albeit as a correspondent

     
     

    It seems that Herman “Crazy Bread” Cain has been outed as a blackity black guy.

    So much for being the HNIC, I guess…

     
     

    For bbkf. For arcane reasons I had to use my desktop to copy what I shared with some folks at another site a while back.

    Adapted from Julia Child’s method, good for a four pound or so brisket.

    2/3 cup coarse or kosher salt OR 1 Tbl. salt plus 1/8 tsp. Prague powder per pound of beef
    1-1/2 tablespoons granulated sugar
    1 Tbl. cracked peppercorns
    1 tsp. allspice
    1 tsp. dried thyme
    1/2 tsp. powdered sage
    1 tsp. paprika
    two bay leaves, crumbled
    1 Tbl. granulated garlic

    Blend the salt and spices together. Rub the spice mix into the meat – massage it in there! Put the beef, along with any salt mix left, into a large ziploc bag. Squeeze out as much air as you can (I mastered the sucking-it-out method but now I vacuum seal). Put the bag on a plate or into a baking dish and set in your fridge on the lowest shelf. Within a few hours the juices should start oozing out – this is a good thing!

    Every day, turn the beef and massage it in the bag (don’t open the bag!) Let it go for at least a week, and there’s really no limit on how long it can go.

    IF you did NOT use Prague powder then the day before you’re going to serve it rinse the meat and put it in a bowl of fresh water, into the fridge with it. Change the water four or five times over 24 hours. Once you’ve desalted it it MUST be used IMMEDIATELY.

    I like to add pickling spice to the cooking water. I also like to sprinkle some brown sugar on the fatty side after cooking then toss it under the broiler until the sugar caramelizes – oooh fucking LAH!

    Oh, you can also look for Morton’s Tender Quick at the market (they have it at Wal-Mart but please buy it there only if you can’t find it elsewhere) – it’s a mix of salt, sugar, nitrate and other shit. Use according to package directions and skip the sugar in this recipe.

    Finally, since they keep indefinitely, and are absolutely fucking delicious, make two or three at a time while you’re at it.

     
     

    Rub the spice mix into the meat – massage it in there!*

    *VH-JR

     
     

    It seems that Herman “Crazy Bread” Cain has been outed as a blackity black guy.

    a tweet from ‘southerncross’:

    now a EX Cain supporter after his racial remarks about Governor Perry It is all about the race card with those People
    Perry 2012

    jesus h! after reading the other tweets, it’s clear that they have been looking for an excuse to get rid of cain, and this is what they come up with…this makes me ashamed to be human…

     
     

    When I went back to school I loved WQXR, the quality classical music station of the New York Times. I can’t remember any hosts – this would have been mid – late 80s.

    And FYWP.

     
     

    this makes me ashamed to be human…

    No need for YOU to be ashamed – they aint the same species as us.

     
     

    Prague powder per pound of beef

    thanks, pup…imma try it! btw…what’s prague powder?

     
     

    No need for YOU to be ashamed – they aint the same species as us

    thanks, again…

     
     

    “Rub the spice mix into the meat – massage it in there!*”

    Cool it with the sex talk actor, this is a family blog.

     
     

    this makes me ashamed to be human…

    Not to worry. They aren’t human, nothing of which to be ashamed there.

     
     

    I also like to sprinkle some brown sugar on the fatty side after cooking then toss it under the broiler until the sugar caramelizes – oooh fucking LAH!

    oooh fucking LAH, indeed!

    cannot wait to try…

     
     

    Funny–Perry with his Texas racism was the one who got excoriated over making the single thoughtful remark made during every one of those debates.

    Now he’s the victim of THE RACE CARD.

    Clueless fuckheads to the last.

     
     

    It is all about the race card with those People

    Who are “those People?” White-ass bigoted fuckheads? I mean JESUS, there’s no way you make a presidential candidate’s long time use of a property named “Niggerhead” not about race, asshole.

     
     

    OK, I’ll just AHEM my own ass here.

     
     

    Cool it with the sex talk actor, this is a family blog.

    Ahem

     
     

    “Clueless fuckheads to the last.”

    I hadn’t seen this before I used the same word. I feel a disturbance in the Force. Or maybe I need to cut down on the beans…

     
     

    I mean JESUS, there’s no way you make a presidential candidate’s long time use of a property named “Niggerhead” not about race, asshole.

    *best Lucille Ball voice*

    Wellllllllllllllllllll…

     
     

    OK, I’m going to name my hunting camp “Fuckhead,” and there’ll be a giant carved Mount Rushmore of southern shame.

     
     

    OK, I’ll just AHEM my own ass here.

    s’okay…the ickiness of that tweet needed a double expunging…

     
     

    OK, I’m going to name my hunting camp “Fuckhead,”

    And we all have to wear Elmer Fudd hats and carry huge shot guns and tawk funnwee….heh heh heh heh heh

     
     

    Clueless Fuckheads

    [hipster republican]I liked their early stuff but their latest album is way too mainstream[/hipster republican]

     
     

    O.K., so you just repeated the offensive “sexy talk” of another. You are still part of the problem and the reason our culture is so debased. For shame actor212 for shame. Are you a porn actor by any chance?

     
     

    I dunno, Actor, how is “tee hee it looks like black people hair” not about race?

     
     

    [hipster republican]I liked their early stuff but their latest album is way too mainstream[/hipster republican]

    Whoa–this is a triple burn and you, sir, are a genius.

     
     

    wow…amanda knox has been freed…

     
     

    I dunno, Actor, how is “tee hee it looks like black people hair” not about race?

    I’m not disagreeing with you.

     
     

    O.K., so you just repeated the offensive “sexy talk” of another. You are still part of the problem and the reason our culture is so debased. For shame actor212 for shame. Are you a porn actor by any chance?

    No, but I’ve played one in films. Several. You can order the DVDs at Adam&Eve.com

     
     

    heh…overheard on radio:

    patrick reusse (D): ….uuuuhhh your chubby guy is still deciding on if he’s going to run…

    soucheray (R):…i hope he does!

    ruesse: uuuuhhhh…is america ready to have a fat-ass for president?

     
     

    Whoa–this is a triple burn and you, sir, are a genius.

    Thanks, I had to redeem myself for missing the 600 mark. I mean that could have been twice as good as 300!

     
     

    IMO, this story is more about what a stupid dumbfuck moron Rick Perry is than anything else. So it’s not his hunting camp and he didn’t name it. But…you’re the fucking Ltn. Gov/Governor of state with MILLIONS of black residents – DID IT NEVER OCCUR TO YOU that most if not ALL of them would find this offensive? Either he didn’t (total fucking dumbass moron) or he did and chose to continue renting it instead of going elsewhere (insensitive bigot). Either way there’s not win in it for him, ANYWHERE. As any half-witted fool would have figured out many years ago…which brings us back to stupid dumbfuck moron.

     
     

    is america ready to have a fat-ass for president?

    As fat as the country is, yes, he’d fit right in. Are they ready for a fat ass corrupt asshole though?

    Sadly, probably, yeah.

     
     

    I’m not disagreeing with you.

    Ah, I guess I just don’t get the nuances of the Lucille Ball reference. Got anything from a more recent decade? :-p

     
     

    Ah, I guess I just don’t get the nuances of the Lucille Ball reference. Got anything from a more recent decade?

    Did you just play the AGE CARD?!?!?!?!?!?

     
     

    is america ready to have a fat-ass for president?

    We just got thru eight years of a fat-head president, so I say yea.

     
     

    Christie lacks the requisite “I hate muslims” gene. Too much “compassion”, No really. If he gets in, someone will play the “People worried about Sharia law are crazy wack jobs” video and he will be toast.

     
     

    Did you just play the AGE CARD?!?!?!?!?!?

    You know, if you put your glasses on you could see it better and you wouldn’t have to ask, Pops…

     
     

    Christie making sense. Watch it, it may be the only time.

     
     

    You know, if you put your glasses on you could see it better and you wouldn’t have to ask, Pops…

    Its more fun groping my way thru the day

     
     

    Its more fun groping my way thru the day

    See, this is why they’re called “booby traps.”

     
     

    See, this is why they’re called “booby traps.”

    And why I purchased chain mail gloves.

     
     

    You know, if you put your glasses on you could see it better and you wouldn’t have to ask, Pops…

    Its more fun groping my way thru the day

    I had always wondered who played Mr. Magoo.

     
     

    Yep. That kind of talk from Christie pretty much kills any chance he may have had.

     
     

    What I mean to say is, those few words are more harmful than all that other baggage.

     
     

    Cain’s response: Dance mutherfucker dance! http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/political-animal/2011_10/cain_runs_into_farright_buzzsa032582.php

    “All I said was the mere fact that that word was there was ‘insensitive.’” Cain told reporters outside his meeting with Donald Trump Monday. “That’s not playing the race card. I am not attacking Gov. Perry. Some people in the media want to attack him. I’m done with that issue!”

    “I really don’t care about that word,” Cain said. “They painted over it. End of story! I accept Gov. Perry’s response on that.”

     
     

    Does this anger make me look fat?

     
     

    “I really don’t care about that word,” Cain said.

    Brutha be trippin’, boo.

     
     

    giant carved Mount Rushmore of southern shame

    Too late.

     
     

    Jess LaGreca is my new hero.

     
     

    Jess LaGreca is my new hero.

    I’m not questioning the provenance of this, but if it hasn’t aired, how did YouTube get hold of it?

     
     

    Ah. Didn’t click thru to YouTube. The New York Observer obtained it.

     
     

    Human habitation of Stone Mountain and its surroundings date back into prehistory.

    and sadly, advanced no further…

     
     

    Jess LaGreca is my new hero.

    i put that as my fb status earlier today…

     
     

    Rudy and Palin were getting kind of failin’
    Just to leave the primary behind
    John and Ricky, working for a penny
    Trying to get a fish on the line
    In a coffee house Crazy Bread sat
    And after every number they’d pass the hat
    Romney and Perry just a-getting higher
    In L.A., you know where that’s at
    And no one’s getting fat except Chris Christie

     
     

    [revised slightly better version]

    Rudy and Palin were getting kind of failin’
    Just to leave the primary behind
    Michele and Ricky, working for a penny
    Trying to get a fish on the line
    In a coffee house Crazy Bread sat
    And after every number they’d pass the hat
    Romney and Perry just a-getting higher
    In Wingnut, you know where that is
    And no one’s getting fat except Chris Christie

     
     

    Call it “Reek Alley”

     
     

    It seems that Herman “Crazy Bread” Cain has been outed as a blackity black guy.

    I knew that the Republicans would find any excuse to abandon Herman Cain for being black. I must admit I thought too well of them, because I didn’t actually expect the stated fucking reason for “he’s a RINO and we must abandon him for non-racist reasons” to actually be about something like that.

    I mean, yeah, the “base” is basically every confederate fuckwad who cheered slavery and segregation, but I wasn’t actually expecting them to state out loud that they were abandoning the black guy because he has a problem with the word nigger and were directly changing their support to the guy who said nigger.

    I guess I assumed that the whole “you used to say nigger, but that stopped working for you” thing was still in place, but I guess all of the masks have been carefully ripped off with the advent of our black president.

    So let’s see here, we’ve had defense of the n-word, use of the n-word, direct arguments by powerful members of congress for the return of segregation, the direct defense of segregation (in a “rising star” nonetheless), open attacks on the Civil RIghts Act and on the idea that black people are allowed to vote, open attacks on women and liberals being allowed to vote, as well as brown people and students, and with Bachmann and others, direct defenses of slavery strongly supported by sitting congresscritters. And that’s before we even get into the “Enlightenment was a sin against God” and the direct support for feudalism.

    So, now the question is what’s the next potential low available for modern conservatives to sink to?

    Return of lynching, revival and defense of the KKK directly rather than just KKK in different clothing, someone being found actually keeping black people as slaves on their plantation?

     
     

    Jess LaGreca is my new hero.

    This guy is kind of a big deal at DKos.

    Dude owned it.

     
     

    I knew that the Republicans would find any excuse to abandon Herman Cain for being black. I must admit I thought too well of them, because I didn’t actually expect the stated fucking reason for “he’s a RINO and we must abandon him for non-racist reasons” to actually be about something like that.

    I thought it would be over something even more hypocritical, like pizza being bad for you. But the race card. Yeah, I like it. It’s not like we needed anymore incontrovertable proof that Repigs are dumb motherfuckers, but here’s a little more for ya.

     
     

    I thought it would be over something even more hypocritical, like pizza being bad for you. But the race card. Yeah, I like it. It’s not like we needed anymore incontrovertable proof that Repigs are dumb motherfuckers evil, soulless, shells of human beings, but here’s a little more for ya.

     
     

    Um, people, we need to all get on the same page and always, when referring to Chris Christie, use the name Fat Bastard.

    GET IN MAH BELLY!!!! Fat Bastard ’12!

     
     

    Rub the spice mix into the meat – massage it in there!*
    *VH-JR

    Put down the jar of Tiger Balm and there won’t be any trouble.

     
     

    I knew that the Republicans would find any excuse to abandon Herman Cain for being black.

    Me too.

    But reading his “I wasn’t playing the race card,” “I accept Perry’s explanation” and all that, I’m still a little blown away. It is one HELL of a party where a black man feels the need to apologize for the fact that he was offended by the word “nigger.” I know I shouldn’t be surprised in the slightest at this point, but they still find ways.

     
     

    Return of lynching, revival and defense of the KKK directly rather than just KKK in different clothing, someone being found actually keeping black people as slaves on their plantation?

    You’re still way too progressive. Their ideal America is one where they wouldn’t need any KKK, because all the black people would be back in chains would understand their proper place and know better than to provoke the white man’s justice by looking at him cross-eyed.

     
     

    Also, as someone who survived the Segregationist South, how the fuck does Herman Cain stand it. I imagine it would be impossible to ignore the glaring sameness of the modern conservative movement and those fucks, especially now that the “base” has pretty much been whittled to just those types of people. I doubt any amount of cognitive dissonance could hide that and if it was so far, then having to apologize for being “rude” by pointing out that going to a location with the n-word that many years after it was obvious that no good was going to come from that word, might be a bit of a “holy shit” type of thing, should have been the final clue.

    So, I wonder how he handles this, internally I mean. I mean, his response was essentially “holllleee, shit, you’re all segregationist KKK assholes aren’t you? Well, fuck.” How do you keep going for that crowd, when you know that they probably long for the days when they could burn crosses on his yard for thinking he could ever be a businessman? Does he cry himself to sleep every night or does the potential earnings of being the one trained monkey racists use to convince themselves they aren’t racist balance it out?

    I think calling out the obvious was a sign that that friction is starting to bump against even his tolerance for swallowing bullshit and that there is a too far that even the quislings will not go.

    At least originally.

    Having to defend the irrehensible, how did that taste? Better get used to it, it’s gonna be a loooooong primary and all signs show it’s only going to get worse from here.

    Who wants to bet that at some point one of the candidates will defend the KKK and the candidate who calls them out on it will be the one forced to apologize by the screaming monsters that are the “base”?

     
     

    Provoking the white man’s justice.

     
     

    This is all going to end with Perry looking like the victim of a liberal media smear, Herman Cain will be diminished because his flipflop answers will piss off various Repuke constituencies, but little or no focus will be devoted to how Perry was using N-head as a shakedown pay-to-play enterprise, which is the real scandal.

     
     

    Chris:

    Yeah, it’s like no matter how much they demonstrate that they are the scum of the Earth, I didn’t actually think they were so far gone as to do that. Not even because I thought they were better people, but rather that they retained enough social shame to try and hide it in BS dog-whistles or manufactured outrage over something that didn’t make them look like the anus of human endeavor.

    Apparently, not only has the Republican Party gotten rid of everyone with a shred of a conscience, they’ve also purged anyone smart enough to hide that fact.

     
     

    Yeah, it’s like no matter how much they demonstrate that they are the scum of the Earth, I didn’t actually think they were so far gone as to do that. Not even because I thought they were better people, but rather that they retained enough social shame to try and hide it in BS dog-whistles or manufactured outrage over something that didn’t make them look like the anus of human endeavor.

    It’s simple, they’re just constantly expanding the boundaries of what they can and can’t say. In the eighties, you have Reagan accusing the poor of being lazy moochers. In the thirties that would’ve gotten him tarred and feathered and run out on a rail, but no one says anything this time. So they take note of it and go on to the next level, saying that because poor people are lazy, society shouldn’t have to burden itself with worrying about them. No one says anything about that either, so they push some more, and arrive to the point they’re at today when they’re openly saying poor people shouldn’t be allowed to vote. Still no one says anything.

    It’s classic incrementalism. Wait, I can get away with this? For real? Hmm, I wonder if I can get away with this too. I can? Oh joy! What else can I get away with?

    They keep expanding the boundaries slowly but surely, and they still haven’t hit the brick wall that tells them they have to stop. Until they do, expect them to keep getting worse. On vote suppression, poor people, civil rights, everything.

     
     

    Perry was using N-head as a shakedown pay-to-play enterprise, which is the real scandal.

    I don’t know how this is a scandal, it’s pretty common in politics at all levels. Unfortunate symptom of a system that sells political offices and voters who are too stupid to understand the issue beyond commentary that fits on a bumper sticker.

     
     

    Semi-related: Stay classy, Hank.

    I am so not ready for some football.

     
     

    … they’ve also purged anyone smart enough to hide that fact.

    Yes. I made this point about an hour ago in a eated-by-fucking-WP post. THIS time, I’m gonna make a copy before submitting, so FUCK YOU WP!

    The biggest scandal, AFAIC, is that here’s a guy who’s been Ltn. Gov/Governor of a state for the better part of what, the last 20 years? And he’s such a stupid dumbfuck idiot moron that he doesn’t recognize that, hey, seeing as how I’m supposed to represent several million black people, all of whom would find the name of this place offensive, even if I paint over this rock…maybe I should FUCKING GO SOMEWHERE ELSE. People have pointed out that he didn’t OWN the palce as if that’s exculpatory – it’s not, other than it exculpates him from being the creative bigot who named it in the first place. It does nothing to excuse the stupid dumbfuck idiotic moronocy of CHOOSING to continue to go there.

    This episode says a lot less about whether or not Rick Perry’s a racist than it says about Rick Perry being a complete fucking stupid dumbfuck idiot moron.

     
     

    Jennifer:

    Yes. I made this point about an hour ago in a eated-by-fucking-WP post. THIS time, I’m gonna make a copy before submitting, so FUCK YOU WP!

    So…

    It’s a vore AHEM?

     
     

    is that here’s a guy who’s been Ltn. Gov/Governor of a state for the better part of what, the last 20 years? And he’s such a stupid dumbfuck idiot moron that he doesn’t recognize that, hey, seeing as how I’m supposed to represent several million black people, all of whom would find the name of this place offensive, even if I paint over this rock…maybe I should FUCKING GO SOMEWHERE ELSE.

    why should he inconvenience himself, his fambly and his buddies? i mean, it’s not like anybody really thinks the good ol’ boys have any intention of representing blacks…perry did just enough to cover his ass for teh libs or the media or whatever, but not enough to make the rest of the good ol’ boys think he was a n!gger lover…

     
     

    But reading his “I wasn’t playing the race card,” “I accept Perry’s explanation” and all that, I’m still a little blown away. It is one HELL of a party where a black man feels the need to apologize for the fact that he was offended by the word “nigger.”

    Personally, I found his bringing it up in the first place to be a pretty crass and cynical ploy. After all, he’s in the thick of the Fuck The Poor party; do you really think he was suddenly shocked and offended to discover a Texas governor hung out at a place that explicitly used the N-word in its name or that said governor never thought anything of it?

    The fact that he backed right off shouldn’t surprise anyone either. None of the money interests give a shit about this issue and they won’t back away from Perry over it so Cain has to give up. What else could he do?

    The whole thing is a sorry mess and doesn’t reflect well on either of them.

     
     

    Telling private citizens with business before the legislature that they better pay for a visit to N-head, whether they end up actually going or not, in order to get any consideration out of the lawmakers, lt. gov, or gov’s office is pretty fucking scandalous. Of course, if it doesn’t get any press or is swept under the rug as part of that “racist smear they tried to get Perry with”, then yeah it’s not a scandal. Sort of like how W’s national guard record went away instantly when focus shifted to the Dan Rather smear job with the supposedly forged documents. Plays like that don’t just happen. They are carefully choreographed.

     
     

    Is there a bigger useless lump of shit on the planet than Mark Penn?

    he’s just plain oooky…no way around it…

     
     

    Patrick Caddell-if you’re going for the same ilk.

     
     

    Personally, I found his bringing it up in the first place to be a pretty crass and cynical ploy.

    If that’s true, then it’s not just crass and cynical but stupid. Playing the race card in a general election’s risky enough, but against a white guy in a Republican primary? How did he not know that would backfire in a New York minute?

     
     

    I mean… What a cynical Clinton underwear sniffer. I don’t even dislike the Clintons…but damn. He’s on hardball saying Obama should bring people together by not talking about taxing the rich. FUCK THAT NOISE.

     
     

    Wow, Lanny Davis should have been there too providing more “liberal” balance.

     
     

    And don’t forget DeeDee Meyers

     
     

    Obama could also bring quite a few people together by beginning the “American Rich Fuck Junk Punching Initiative”.

     
    Whale Chowder from his phone
     

    I would pull the lever enthusiastically for that

    Yeah, that’s not a euphemism.

     
     

    Semi-related: Stay classy, Hank.

    CENSORSHIP! FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHTS DENIED!

    /whinger

     
     

    I’m SO GLAD to not see that piece of SHIT on my tv before my beloved Monday Night Football. Hank Jr is shitty musician and shitty person and needs to fuck off to Mississippi and marry his 2 or 3 favorite sheep. Piece of shit. His fucking kid is 50 times the Country singer he is. You’ll NEVER BE YOUR DADDY, HANK II. So fuck off.

     
     

    Humpin hoes could get yer dick broke.

    You’ve been warned. YOU’RE WELCOME.

     
     

    omg, for realz. He is such dumb fucking piece of redneck country bumpkin shit. Go fuck yourself, Hank.

     
     

    The whole thing is a sorry mess and doesn’t reflect well on either of them.

    Now I have NO IDEA who I’m voting for.

     
     

    I’m SO GLAD to not see that piece of SHIT on my tv before my beloved Monday Night Football. Hank Jr is shitty musician and shitty person and needs to fuck off to Mississippi and marry his 2 or 3 favorite sheep. Piece of shit. His fucking kid is 50 times the Country singer he is. You’ll NEVER BE YOUR DADDY, HANK II. So fuck off.

    i don’t think i could agree ENOUGH with this statement, tsam…except that i would feel bad for the sheep…

     
     

    The fact is, of course poor people should not be able to vote. They will only vote themselves more socialism and redistributionism, which is an economic system that has been proven to not work time and time again. The founders had it right when only property owners could vote, only they had skin in the game. In fact, votes should be allocated by assets or income to be trule fair. Then will have freedom

     
     

    gary just sort of dribbled off there, didn’t he?

     
     

    I give that about a six on the Gar-O-Meter.

     
     

    except that i would feel bad for the sheep…

    Meh. If they don’t make it in the mattress commercial biz, pretending to be Hank’s mom or an underage niece doesn’t seem like a horrible gig. Think of the nightly deep fried smorgasbord a guy could dig his hooves into…

     
     

    THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH DRIBBLING. Both Dudeskull and the Harlem Globetrotters excel at it.

     
     

    THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH DRIBBLING. Both Dudeskull and the Harlem Globetrotters excel at it.

    FINE…he trickled off then…

     
     

    Meh. If they don’t make it in the mattress commercial biz, pretending to be Hank’s mom or an underage niece doesn’t seem like a horrible gig. Think of the nightly deep fried smorgasbord a guy could dig his hooves into…

    assuming his brain injury allows for a fully functioning weenis, i assume it is probably a tiny weenis and so not much discomfort…

     
     

    assuming his brain injury allows for a fully functioning weenis, i assume it is probably a tiny weenis and so not much discomfort…

    I’m guessing he jacks off to lynching and war carnage photos anyway, so it would likely be a sexless marriage.

     
     

    holy shit! i have just discovered on-line thrift shops…

     
     

    holy shit! i have just discovered on-line thrift shops…

    You do know about Regretsy, right?

     
     

    I’m not questioning the provenance of this, but if it hasn’t aired, how did YouTube get hold of it?

    I think that’s not Faux footage. Someone else in the crowd had a camera. Note that the audio volume doesn’t follow the microphone. The Faux camera would be getting its sound from the mic.

    I would pull the lever enthusiastically for that.

    Next contestant please… Welcome Charles Koch!

    Except, of course, Garden Weasels.

    tsam said,

    October 4, 2011 at 3:08

    This x1000.

    My stock reply when asked my opinion on country music has for decades been “Hank Sr. good. Hank Jr. bad.” with the addenda “Hank III? Huh, alright. We’ll see.” when he started.

     
     

    TinTin: Thanks for pulling the plug on Dennis.

     
     

    “Hank Sr. good. Hank Jr. bad.” with the addenda “Hank III? Huh, alright. We’ll see.” when he started.

    I like the kid

     
     

    I like the kid

    Yeah, as far as I can tell, he’s a-ok.

    Damn sight better than #2

     
     

    Damn sight better than #2

    I hear ya. I’m not big on Country anyway, but I can tolerate and even like that classic stuff, 3 pulls it off, then switches to some punk/metal stuff–he’s a pretty talented dude. Plays drums, bass, guitars….

     
     

    I hear ya. I’m not big on Country anyway, but I can tolerate and even like that classic stuff, 3 pulls it off, then switches to some punk/metal stuff–he’s a pretty talented dude. Plays drums, bass, guitars….

    my son adores him…

     
     

    wyatt cenac: there aren’t enough black people making maps!

     
     

    I’m not big on Country anyway, but I can tolerate and even like that classic stuff

    I like the old-school stuff. My problem with country nowadays is that, for a genre founded in salt-of-the-earth grit and grounding, the “Britney Spears/Backstreet Boys with a pedal steel and a twang” schtick that it has become just seems like self-parody. “Big-n-Rich” and the like just make me ill. Fuck, Hank Jr’s ’70s output sounds good compared to the complete dreck shoveled out there lately.

    I’m sure there are a few talented folks plying their trade in country today, but the whole scene seems like flies feeding on the turds of dead titans.

    I’ve got a decent bit of Hank Sr, Cash and the Stanley Bros on my ipod. Hank Jr. won’t be making it on.

     
     

    why the fuck is Thomas Friedman on the Daily Show?

     
     

    why the fuck is Thomas Friedman on the Daily Show?

    i was just thinking that…idk what’s going on there lately…

     
     

    why the fuck is Thomas Friedman on the Daily Show?

    Is it a special on the negative effects of head trauma?

     
     

    Also:

    Peanut butter + Nutella + apples. YOU’RE WELCOME.

     
     

    I like the old-school stuff. My problem with country nowadays is that, for a genre founded in salt-of-the-earth grit and grounding, the “Britney Spears/Backstreet Boys with a pedal steel and a twang” schtick that it has become just seems like self-parody. “Big-n-Rich” and the like just make me ill.

    God, no shit. Save a horse, ride a cowboy? Really? That would be perfect with a drop top, sick bling, wall to wall Gucci, and a grill, yo.

    I always found it really strange that Country went to hell as Rock and Roll hit it’s stride. Now they both are nothing more than occasional bright flashes in an utter ocean of POOP. I used to hate hearing people say how much better rock was from 64 to about 74, BUT IT FUCKING WAS. Fuck even the indie shit out there is about as rock and roll as an old Jim Nabors album. All those hipster fucks with their fugly ass glasses and filthy, scraggly beards and their samey, shit music…

    Who pushed my asshole button tonight?

     
     

    Heh. Friedman. I’ll BET YOU MONEY that chump wears a corduroy jacket with patches on the elbows around the house and smokes a pipe. I’ll bet he’s even got a dainty cap. He thinks he’s witty but he’s only half right.

     
     

    [sigh]

    Nooobody knooooows the trouble I’ve seen…..

    Nooooobody knows but Jesus….

    /The Very Jesus Louis Armstrong.

     
     

    Know what else makes me mad? I could TOTALLY write a whole goddamn book full of FAIL and still not get a job writing unintelligible dogshit for any newspaper, let alone the NYFT. WHAT. THE. HELL?????

     
     

    Fine. I get it. You’re dead.

     
     

    Fuck even the indie shit out there is about as rock and roll as an old Jim Nabors album. All those hipster fucks with their fugly ass glasses and filthy, scraggly beards and their samey, shit music…

    Have I mentioned I am seeing the Mekons play a loud show in Chicago on Wednesday?

     
     

    I have several tweed jackets with patches on the elbows.

    Don’t wear them around the house though. Especially now that I have a cat.

     
     

    I have several tweed jackets with patches on the elbows.

    Don’t wear them around the house though. Especially now that I have a cat.

    You simply MUST wear your jacket and smoke your pipe while thinking in the study. Be sure to strike a picture perfect pose…

     
     

    The Mekons are still alive? Wow–That’s the best kind of live music there is.

     
     

    Who’s gonna be the first to write Dennis/Actor212 slashfic?

    The twist is tsam, who arrives out-of-nowhere at the end of the film and slits everyone’s throat. Then tsam is run over by a Mack truck. Roll credits.

     
     

    The Mekons are still alive?

    They’re kinda surprised by it also.

    …hell, they just released a very good album.

     
     

    I used to hate hearing people say how much better rock was from 64 to about 74

    I don’t care how good it might have been (actually I think we only remember the good stuff) but I just can’t listen to any more after hearing it for so many decades.

    Remember how you used to laugh at your dad because he was still listening to Glenn Miller?

     
     

    I never cared much for country music, having grown up with way too much of that whiny shit around my hometown. But that shit was fucking Tchaikovsky compared to the dreck they’ve served up for the last 20 years or so.

    And Hank Williams Jr. is a winger blowhard and a shitty entertainer to boot. Fuck him.

     
     

    I just can’t listen to any more after hearing it for so many decades.

    I’m with you on that, MK. Creedence and Aerosmith were great the first 300 times you heard ’em but after that it got a little old. And the Moody Blues? Best band that’s ever made me gag.

     
     

    The twist is tsam, who arrives out-of-nowhere at the end of the film and slits everyone’s throat. Then tsam is run over by a Mack truck. Roll credits.

    Genius. Nobody will ever see it coming. Even on the second viewing, it will still be a shock!

     
     

    Remember how you used to laugh at your dad because he was still listening to Glenn Miller?

    I have a bunch of Glenn Miller on my ipod too.

    A week or two ago I was scrolling through it and realized that the lion’s share of it was stuff that to teh younguns coming of age today would seem about as current as doo-wop would have seemed to me when I was in my mid teens. I nearly wept.

    I do actually have some newer stuff on there. Really. Honest.

     
     

    Except I’m an 80’s kid who HATED that shit growing up. But once I caught on to Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, The Who…I don’t mean the shit the classic stations have played all day every day for the last 30 years. I mean the deeper stuff.

    Like this

    They just don’t DO the BIG thing anymore. This pop stuff today does not compare.

     
    An IBM Desktop From 1983
     

    Z0MG

     
     

    To add to my point: You DO have to reduce it all to the real gems that speak to you. But for a true connection on a level a little higher than something fun to listen to in your car, that shit hasn’t been topped. Of course I’m a musician and therefore a bit of a snob. I have to feel something besides a carefully composed hit song to be into it.

     
     

    Pfft. See me in 10 years.

     
     

    I have a bunch of Glenn Miller on my ipod too.

    Now that I’m playing in a big band, I have more swing jazz than I ever did. I’m finally getting over the fact that that old music isn’t at all like what was on Lawrence Welk all the years I grew up.

     
     

    (actually I think we only remember the good stuff) but I just can’t listen to any more after hearing it for so many decades.

    There really was a godawful amount of crap that came out of that era. That’s true of most times though. Cripes, look at the 80s.

    There are a few things that still really like from then and can still listen to regularly, but it ain’t much. The stuff I appreciate most from then is the stuff I haven’t heard in ages and stumble onto. I can happily hear it once and wave it back to obscurity.

     
     

    Who pushed my asshole button tonight?

    I think that’s something you need to keep track of yourself.

    also, too… band name. Asshole Buttons.

     
     

    I do agree that everything that’s come out of Nashville in the past 20 years is pure crap.

     
     

    You should’ve heard the Asshole Buttons before they sold out.

     
     

    Remember how you used to laugh at your dad because he was still listening to Glenn Miller?

    If you’re in the mood for it, I like this tempo and arrangement.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_CI-0E_jses&feature=related

     
     

    I have to work. What are the rest of you doing up at this hour?

     
     

    The twist is tsam, who arrives out-of-nowhere at the end of the film and slits everyone’s throat. Then tsam is run over by a Mack truck, just as Jennifer is shocked to see him coming at her.. Roll credits.

    Added for completeness.

     
     

    The music that I’ve most appreciated as I’ve (for lack of a better word) matured would be swing/big band, bop & even cool jazz/West Coast jazz, as opposed to the wailing free jazz of my yout’.

    Here’s a revisionist who’s starting to think Sinatra is shit.

     
     

    Confession Time: I’ve always thought that Sinatra was hugely over-rated. Yes he was pitch perfect, but 95% of the time he was singing teh same three or four notes – so big whoop. Look at how controlled his half-octave is! And yes his delivery had that distinctive style so that you always knew when you were listening to Sinatra. But as a result, you always knew when you were listening to Sinatra. Seriously – every single song is sung exactly teh same regardless of content. Smugly.

    Maybe it’s that I lack context. By teh time I first heard Sinatra, he was old people’s music. That jazzy syncopated swing? Already old hat.

     
     

    Seriously, Crazy cat-lady or whatever thread? Still? What is this, like 5 days now? The time-sig on the thread openers should start including a day, maybe a month and year. Also, too, can we at least have a little more meat than a one-sentece “shorter” followed by multiple admonitions not to “get off the boat”? This is supposed to be a blog about ridiculing the odious posts on right-wing blogs, innit? Rememeber when there used to be pithy, devastating point-by-point fisking of Clown-Hall, ASW and Freeper posts?

    Short S,N!, circa 2011: “one-sentence reductio ad absurdiem of something someone no one’s heard of wrote somewhere, but don’t read it! Here’s a funny (-ish) P-shop for you to snerk at. Take it away, posters–don’t forget to provide poop and penis jokes, ’cause we’re all really 9 years old at heart. Oh, and tell us what you’re eating for dinner, and be sure to provide recipes!

    Except that’s actually longer than most of what Tintin has bothered to put out lately. Oh, and whatever happened to Gavin? D. Aristophanes? Brad? HTML Mencken?

    Seriously, I love this blog, and the commenters here are some of the funniest MFers on teh intarwebs, but I have seriously been thinking about getting off the boat and staying there. Anybody wanna migrate to Driftglass with me?

     
     

    I just assumed the other authors were busy or had moved on. I wouldn’t mind a little more text, too, but Tintin may have this thing I’ve heard of…it’s foreign, exotic, a little scary…I believe it’s called a “life.”

    I dunno. Mainly I just come here to hang out with everyone. My not having much of this “life” people speak of.

     
     

    Asshole Buttons.

    ha, number one son briefly had a band called ‘ass goblins’…

     
     

    “one-sentence reductio ad absurdiem of something someone no one’s heard of wrote somewhere, but don’t read it! Here’s a funny (-ish) P-shop for you to snerk at. Take it away, posters–don’t forget to provide poop and penis jokes, ’cause we’re all really 9 years old at heart. Oh, and tell us what you’re eating for dinner, and be sure to provide recipes!

    You say that like it’s a bad thing.

    it’s foreign, exotic, a little scary…I believe it’s called a “life.” Also, I suspect he has ….and brace yourself, this might be shocking…. a “job”.

    AIEEEEE!!!!!

    Mainly I just come here to hang out with everyone.

    Yeah. Plus, it’s less zombigoted than most of the internet.

    Seriously, Steerpike, you could start a new blog of your own, for free, and post the way you’d like…. but until then, I think we should see if Sadly, No might refund your entrance fee.

     
     

    Seriously – every single song is sung exactly teh same regardless of content. Smugly.

    Funny, because Sinatra’s forte is unique phrasing. You want vocals, you listen to Dino

     
     

    AFUCKINGMEN! i live in a radio wasteland…we have 4 ‘classic’ rock stations that play the same fucking playlist over and over and over and over…plus they suck balls when it comes to music flow

    LOOXURY!

    We have one, count ’em, ONE rock radio station (except for the hours that local colleges devote to any rock at all). We lost our new (eg Anything later than 1990 that’s not Pearl Jam or Nirvana) rock station a few months back to an FM all news format.

    WTF? Who listens to news in stereo????? This is NYC! We have five decent news stations on the AM dial!

     
     

    Short S,N!, circa 2011: “one-sentence reductio ad absurdiem of something someone no one’s heard of wrote somewhere, but don’t read it! Here’s a funny (-ish) P-shop for you to snerk at. Take it away, posters–don’t forget to provide poop and penis jokes, ’cause we’re all really 9 years old at heart. Oh, and tell us what you’re eating for dinner, and be sure to provide recipes!

    If you stop being nine at heart, you end up ten

     
    Helmut Monotreme
     

    You want vocals, you listen to Dino
    I had no idea the Flintstone family pet went on to have a successful music career.

     
     

    I had no idea the Flintstone family pet went on to have a successful music career.

    You missed the “Behind the Music”?

    Dino, Astro, and the band went on a world tour! It was…tragic. Muttley broke up the band when he forced the lads to have Scrappy Doo sit in on the recording sessions.

     
     

    Funny, because Sinatra’s forte is unique phrasing.

    “Unique” to Frank. No seriously – teh guy can take Old Man River and infuse it with teh exact same emotional power as Bad Bad Leroy Brown. He’s as emotionally invested in the lyrics he sings as, uh, someone that’s not invested at all (oooh, snap!).

    I mean clearly the guy was a very competent musician with a high degree technical excellence. That’s not singing, that’s Autotune.

     
     

    And it was ironic you chose “Ol’ Man River” to critique.

     
     

    Maybe you’re just less enamoured with the Frankamania thing than his actual singing, dkw?

    I know I HATED The Beatles for a long time because of all of the douchy fucking fanboys who almost projected a sort of pity if you didn’t rubber stamp everything (Including such masterpieces as “Yellow Submarine”) as perfect and the bestest rock and roll EVER in the history of the universe and the future too, also!

    They were the original Apple fanboys. Arrogant, blind, stupid, irritating.

    I have come around to liking much of The Beatles’ library, however. I just ignore their phuktard fans.

     
     

    enamoured

    A little misspelling for ALL MY LEAFS SUCK neighbors!

     
     

    perfect and the bestest rock and roll EVER in the history of the universe and the future too, also!

    Well…

    …you know….

    they were. 🙂

     
     

    ooo, Dragon-King is picking a fight with actor!!

    I never gave much of a shit about Sinatra. But back in college, the final Clash tour stopped in Milwaukee the same night that Frankie was in an adjacent theater; when we went downtown, the parking structure had a reader board that said “Welcome Clash-Frank Sinatra fans!” like it was some twisted double bill. We chuckled heartily. At least teh Clash got top billing.

     
     

    Well…

    …you know….

    they were. 🙂

    AMONG the best. No disputing that.

     
     

    I never gave much of a shit about Sinatra.

    Yea, I mean, here I am defending the guy and I only own one album of his (and its a compilation to boot). For me, he ranks lower than Nat King Cole as a singer, but that’s more because Cole is a god to me.

     
     

    AMONG the best. No disputing that.

    They were perfect. PERFECT! Damn you!

     
     

    They were perfect. PERFECT! Damn you!

    Where’s my knife? It’s around here somewh…

    YOU STAY RIGHT THERE

    Fucking knife, come on, man…shit

    You’re LUCKY I LOST MY KNIFE!

     
     

    You’re LUCKY I LOST MY KNIFE!

    Picard!

     
     

    “Unique” to Frank. No seriously – teh guy can take Old Man River and infuse it with teh exact same emotional power as Bad Bad Leroy Brown. He’s as emotionally invested in the lyrics he sings as, uh, someone that’s not invested at all (oooh, snap!).

    I mean clearly the guy was a very competent musician with a high degree technical excellence. That’s not singing, that’s Autotune.

    yeah…all frank sounds the same to me…not a fan…

     
     

    I didn’t even think Sinatra was particularly on-key. That might have been ‘styling’ but I’mma come down on DKW’s side on this one.

    You want a (male) vocalist, give Mel Torme a listen.

    And of course for females, Ella. My gawd.

     
    Helmut Monotreme
     

    I think Frank Sinatra was a heck of a vocalist and a great entertainer. If he typecast himself by the choices he made, well it’s sad, but I don’t think he was trying to be an artist. Elvis made the same choice in his vegas years.

     
     

    And of course for females, Ella. My gawd.</i.

    don't forget etta james…

    also, too…one of my all time faves? boots randolph…

     
     

    Elvis made the same choice in his vegas carbohydrate years.

    Fuqqst.

     
     

    Elvis made the same choice in his vegas years.

    blasphemer!!!

     
     

    aaaaaaannnnnddddd let’s not forget tagfail!

     
     

    petula clark

     
    Helmut Monotreme
     

    Paul Simon got a lot of crap for Graceland, but by choosing to learn from and be inspired by totally different people, he managed to bring a totally new sound to mainstream America and stay relevant as an artist (and make a huge amount of cash) for another decade or so. It sure wouldn’t have hurt Sinatra or Elvis to have tried the same thing at some point in their careers. Elvis might have managed to put off the cycle of self destruction long enough to do a rap collaboration with the Fat Boys. And who would have bought an album of Frank Sinatra after he learned a thing or two from some Tibetan throat singers? (besides every single one of his fans, I mean)

     
     

    Peggy Lee

    We did a version of Fever based on her recording for our last two shows. 50 years after the original, that song still kills.

     
    Helmut Monotreme
     

    who wouldn’t*

     
     

    Patsy Cline.

    I WIN

     
     

    Also, Tony Curtis destroyed Sinatra and Tourmet.

     
     

    Yeah, you’re right. In Old Man River, Frank busts out teh other half of his vocal range. Maybe a full octave and a half. But that’s the exception and not the rule.

    Plus, seriously. Old Man River. Sung liek it’s about gettin’ with teh steamboat harlots. He sings Old Man River the way he sings No Business Like Show Business. Which I guess is a great META statement about Show Boat, but I think that’s unintentional.

     
     

    Paul Simon got a lot of crap for Graceland, but by choosing to learn from and be inspired by totally different people, he managed to bring a totally new sound to mainstream America and stay relevant as an artist

    In fairness to Elvis and Sinatra, they led American music in their day, where Simon had slipped into near oblivion by the Graceland album.

    The apt comparison would be the Beatles going to India.

     
     

    Tony Curtis destroyed Sinatra and Tourmet.

    o/~ Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyondah lies the catle of mah fadderrrrrrrrrr! o/~

     
     

    You meant Tony Bennett, right?

     
     

    BENNET. TONY BENNET.

    Fuck.

     
     

    You meant Tony Bennett, right?

    Yes, wtf? 0850. Too early for a drink?

    I think NOT!

     
     

    Graceland was a FUCKING AWESOME ALBUM. Paul Simon is a great musician.

    Also love Kodachrome. Great song. Not the most insightful lyrics ever, but a cool song nonetheless.

     
    jim-with-the-ponies
     

    You want vocals, you listen to Dino NINA.

    [ /fixed it for u i did ]

     
     

    50 years after the original, that song still kills.

    Boy does it. That one is a masterpiece. You can’t stop yourself from loving it.

     
     

    Not the most insightful lyrics ever, but a cool song nonetheless.

    Really? I think the first line is one the best ever written.

     
    Helmut Monotreme
     

    I never said Graceland wasn’t an awesome album, I implied people gave him shit for not sharing the wealth with Ladysmith Black Mambazo. But he did give them worldwide recognition, where previously they were only big in SA.

     
     

    enamoured,,,

    This is probably it. I’m not saying he can’t sing – it’s hard to think of anyone moar technically competent. But technical skill, a bit of flair with teh syncopated swing – and that’s it. Not exactly Legend-making stuff.

    That in conjunction with his complete detachment from teh songs he sings. Here’s what I mean – Frank Sinatra’s singing is about Frank Sinatra first, and teh song as an afterthought. And while that is not necessarily a deal-breaker for me, I usually don’t consider it a plus.

     
     

    You know who’s a great vocalist?

    That Bono guy.

    He even did a duet with Sinatra!

     
     

    Really? I think the first line is one the best ever written.

    It is, but then he’s like, “mama, don’t take my Kodachrome away”. He graduated from High School. Why’s he gotta fight his mama for the camera? Does he still live with her? How is he going meet a nice girl if he…OH THE CAMERA…right….Good plan, Pauly.

     
     

    Graceland was a FUCKING AWESOME ALBUM

    I saw him on that tour, with Ladysmith Black Mambazo. It was indeed fine.

     
     

    Altho, following Jim’s link, I came across this rather unlikely pairing.

    WTF? This would be like Johnny Rotten singing a duet with Zamfir, the Pan flautist

     
     

    You know who’s a great vocalist?

    That Bono guy.

    Still love the first incarnation of U2. October, The Unforgettable Fire and Joshua Tree all get regular rotation. Rattle and Hum makes a guest appearance now and then to bash out Silver and Gold, which is a brilliant tune.

     
     

    Why’s he gotta fight his mama for the camera?

    Because, secretly, Paul Simon is D-KW, and…

     
     

    Still love the first incarnation of U2.

    Yea. For me, Zoo Station was where they should have broken up.

     
     

    Yea. For me, Zoo Station was where they should have broken up.

    But then by now we’d have to endure the incessant reunion tours.

     
     

    Because, secretly, Paul Simon is D-KW, and,,,

    The first thing I remember, I was lying in a bed
    I couldn’t have been used moar thoroughly too
    And I remember other men whimpering from the room next door and
    Your mother laughed the way some ladies do

     
     

    But then by now we’d have to endure the incessant reunion tours.

    They should have learned to hate each other, like The Police.

     
     

    Confession Time: Teh Joshua Tree is my least favourite U2 album. Probs due to teh overexposure at teh time. Although 24 years seems a long time to hold a grudge.

     
     

    The first thing I remember, I was lying in a bed
    I couldn’t have been used moar thoroughly too
    And I remember other men whimpering from the room next door and
    Your mother laughed the way some ladies do

    The first thing I remember, I was lying in a bed
    There couldn’t have been no more than one or two
    And I remember there’s a video, showing D-KW’s momma’s womb
    And she laughed the way some ladies do, yea

     
     

    Still love the first incarnation of U2. October, The Unforgettable Fire and Joshua Tree all get regular rotation. Rattle and Hum makes a guest appearance now and then to bash out Silver and Gold, which is a brilliant tune.

    mmhmm! and the r & h film put lust in my heart…

     
     

    You know who’s a great vocalist?

    That Bono guy.

    I think he was only holding Cher back. Then he went off to Congress with Paul Simon.

     
     

    But then by now we’d have to endure the incessant reunion tours.

    We are enduring the “Oh, U2 is on tour? Shit, I didn’t even know there was a new album. Heh. Silly Irishmen.” stuff.

     
     

    Confession Time: Teh Joshua Tree is my least favourite U2 album. Probs due to teh overexposure at teh time. Although 24 years seems a long time to hold a grudge.

    It’s the least good of the trilogy I specified earlier, but still brilliant to me. Bullet the Blue Sky is actually one of the best rock songs ever.

     
     

    Is U2 ever NOT on tour anymore? I swear, it’s like they owe someone money or something.

     
     

    “Well the God I believe in isn’t short on Cash, Mister!”

     
     

    I think he was only holding Cher back. Then he went off to Congress with Paul Simon.

    Son, Son, Sonny of Congress
    Fast as he can be…
    Hoo, haw, Look at me
    Watch out for the tree!

    What? Too soon?

     
     

    U2 is still together?

    THEY MIGHT BE ZOMBIES

     
     

    Then he went off to Congress with Paul Simon.

    i hope you are talking of the actual congress, not some sort of secondary definition…cuz…ewwww!

     
     

    It’s the least good of the trilogy I specified earlier,,,

    Maybe. I dunno – I can’t think about Joshua Tree without traumatic flashbacks to endless of hours of Still Haven’t Found Where The Streets Are With Or Without You. I get it Mr. Radio Guys, you really like those three songs.

    I noticed you skipped War. No love for Sunday Bloody Sunday?

     
     

    U2 is still together?

    This said by the fan of the band that’s been together for nearly 30 years?

     
     

    TRIGGER WARNING. Read teh mouseover text.

     
     

    I have approximately 700 vinyl albums. Mostly classic rock from the late 60s, the 70s and the early 80s. About a quarter of those were picked up in bargain bins and were bought because they had one good song on them. Most of the rest are pretty solid albums that I can happily listen to most if not all the songs on. And there are a few weak albums by great bands that I had to buy simply because it completed a collection. I am currently converting them to mp3 format at a rather leisurely pace. I have pretty complete sets of Beatles, Pink Floyd, Jethro Tull, Creedence, Moody Blues, Yes, Uriah Heep, Cream, Simon and Garfunkel/Paul Simon, Bob Marley, Donovan and Jimi Hendrix.

     
     

    TRIGGER WARNING. Read teh mouseover text.

    uh, you know that was pretty much a challenge to click the link, right? and might i be the first to say that that cover is truly fucking awful?

     
     

    This said by the fan of the band that’s been together for nearly 30 years?

    Dude, they’re going on 40. Class of ’77.

    Unlike U2, the Mekes always admitted they sucked.

     
     

    I noticed you skipped War. No love for Sunday Bloody Sunday?

    I like that album too, but for some reason I can’t sit through it. I should have mentioned Under a Blood Red Sky, because the SBS and New Year’s Day versions on there are better than the album, strangely enough.

     
     

    as i am reading this music discussion, it is ‘polka tuesday’ on our local am station…polka is the one genre where the lead singer can sing like absolute shit and teh people will still get out there and dance…

     
     

    but he also inherited his parents’s vinyl selection

    I also inherited a fair number of records from dad. Although that is made up mostly of Big Band, Hawaiian music, Calypso and Steel Drum music.

     
    jim-with-the-ponies
     

    You warblog in the teeth of stupidity with the “really 9 years old at heart” you HAVE, not the “really 9 years old at heart” you WISH you had.

    If I’ve already opted to “migrate” to Driftglass at other times, does that make me a SPLITTER?

    Judging from recent activity, perhaps not so much: in order that the SadlyHamsters, those unsung heros in our midst, might continue to feast through the lean winter, I just ordered my very own state-of-the-art SadlyMug™, it’s bold-yet-sensible silhouette wind-tunnel-tested & designed from the ground up so as to enable you to spew your piehole-load of unfinished beverage back into it in the event of sudden Comment Catharsis Projectile Syndrome, thus potentially saving a small fortune on your computer budget … even though the price left me with BOTH a nosebleed & mild tinnitus. Can it get any better than Pam Gellar beginning to eat a baby panda alive, captioned with an admonishment to her to keep at it & finish the poor yowling little bugger off? Let’s face it – people should have to pay just for the privilege of being able to DRINK from such a thing of beauty & wisdom, let alone actually getting to OWN one.

    Yes, this place was more epic & wild in the halcyon era of Gavin/HTML/Brad/Mr.Pierce, so chagrin over doing a compare/contrast with what it is now is understandable. But the real best answer has already been given above – exercise the individual franchise that you have to get on your own Interwebs place & let it rip.

    BE TEH SNARK THAT YOU WANT TO SEE, sheeples!

     
     

    really 9 years old at heart

    Looxury! We used to dreeaam of being 9 years old at heart. We had to get by with being 6 years old at kidney.

     
     

    Migration is for the birds.

     
     

    OT – I guess.

    Taht Jesse LaGreca unaired Faux interview already has almost a third of a million views. The YouTube is unlisted and doesn’t show up in searches.

     
     

    As much as I agree that “today’s music sucks” (as it always has and always will), there’s good stuff to be found. A few items in my rotation folks may or may not have been exposed to (or may be ridiculously old news because I am in no way “hip”):

    Santeria was damn good “rock”, although this album is old (2002) already and they broke up a few years ago. Damn, time flies.

    I Can Lick Any Sonofabitch In The House also rocks in a “hard blues” sort of way. They’re still around.

    Floater provides my current Metal/Prog/loud/weird/undefinable fix.

    Casey Neill is a bit mellower, but still good. Might be too hipsterish for some.

    Hillstomp is fun — they’re currently on hiatus, but the drummer started a new band with McDougall that I thinks shows promise.

    Now that I think about it, everybody but Santeria is from Oregon. I know you’re all shocked by this.

     
     

    Wow. I fly all the way to Winnipeg, sleep for 5 hours, and the music discussion is still going strong.

     
    jim-with-the-ponies
     

    Robot Flocking In Reality!

    (WARNING – may be remarkably easy to fap to)

     
     

    Christie isn’t running and that UW student was released from prison in Italy. What will the media possibly talk about now? They’re probably right now searching frantically for a shark attack or a pretty white girl that got abducted…

     
     

    What will the media possibly talk about now?

    Sh! The iPhone 5 is about to be introduced!

     
     

    All you breeders need to go and immediately purchase this book for your offspring.

     
     

    Sh! The iPhone 5 is about to be introduced!

    I like and own a bunch of Apple products, but even I am sick of the fucking iPhone.

     
     

    All you breeders need to go and immediately purchase this book for your offspring.

    As diaper liners? I’m sorry, but teh babby’s teh one that’s supposed to be putting teh p00p into teh diaper.

     
     

    I like and own a bunch of Apple products, but even I am sick of the fucking iPhone.

    You’re gonna love Siri

     
     

    Wow. I fly all the way to Winnipeg, sleep for 5 hours, and the music discussion is still going strong.

    You’re welcome.

     
     

    All you breeders need to go and immediately purchase this book for your offspring.

    I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

     
     

    Robot Flocking In Reality!

    Glenn Reynold’s fantasies just got a lot more complicated.

     
     

    All you breeders need to go and immediately purchase this book for your offspring.

    Gah! That picture!

    One has a creepy, vacuous, painted on stare. The other one’s a fursuit.

     
     

    All you breeders need to go and immediately purchase this book for your offspring.

    Is that “Tiffany” Gingrich?

     
     

    Sh! The iPhone 5 is about to be introduced!

    Heh. No iPhone 5, just an update to the 4 (a kewl update, admittedly) but the best part is that Murdoch’s WSJ got neatly pwned by a false rumor that Sprint would be receiving exclusive rights to the iPhone 5 in exchange for buying 30 billion dollars worth of the fuckers….

     
     

    The Stepford Mistress™

     
     

    Damn, no i5? Ah well, the 4S looks pretty kewl and my contract is up in January anyway…

     
     

    HEH. They’re showing Shatner singing “Iron Man” on the “news”.

    Of course they’re live recording him in the studio singing with the headphones on–no background music. Not really fair to the Captain. That dude is SUCH A trip.

     
     

    Murdoch’s WSJ got neatly pwned by a false rumor that Sprint would be receiving exclusive rights to the iPhone 5 in exchange for buying 30 billion dollars worth of the fuckers

    It’s sad how sloppy the WSJ has gotten

     
     

    Ouch. Apple immediately dropped $10 on the no i5 announcement

     
     

    It’s sad how sloppy the WSJ has gotten

    Their editorial page is still the powerhouse it always was.

     
     

    Uh oh. Bahbah Wawa dropped an N bomb on Teh Vyooh!

    White people are offended that black people aren’t cool widit.

     
     

    Their editorial page is still the powerhouse it always was.

    Here’s the thing: I could take their editorial page in exchange for the really good reporting the news staff did under Dow Jones. They were thorough and fair and often exhibited the slightest of liberal biases.

    But they got the story right, or they didn’t run it, even if they could label it a rumour and leave it at that.

     
     

    Here’s the thing: I could take their editorial page in exchange for the really good reporting the news staff did under Dow Jones. They were thorough and fair and often exhibited the slightest of liberal biases.

    Agreed. I think they had a right to be proud of their actual reporting outside of their psycho wall scribbling page before Murdoch fixed all of that for them.

    Also, who else is creeped out by the desperate butthole licking that Christie is getting? I guess it takes a long time to tongue that much hole, but damn man, it’s getting a little creepy up in this joint.

     
     

    Chris Christie:

    “I will not abandon my commitment to New Jersey. I will fix a broken New Jersey. I’m proud of the work we’ve done, but I know I’m not nearly done.”

    There’s still shit to break, he did not add.

     
     

    Chris Christie can’t run and he can’t hide.

     
     

    Apple immediately dropped $10 on the no i5 announcement

    hey. Wall Street haz a sad that there isn’t a new status-toy.

    Nebbermine the fact that the faster processor, cloud-based syncing and voice control are all big evolutionary steps forward.

    Hell, Siri alone will likely decrease distracted-driving accidents by 10%.

     
     

    Chris Christie can’t run and he can’t hide.

    o, well played. Make yourself a drink.

     
     

    Nebbermine the fact that the faster processor, cloud-based syncing and voice control are all big evolutionary steps forward.

    Hell, Siri alone will likely decrease distracted-driving accidents by 10%.

    What if the response voice is a douchy concern troll like HAL? Tread lightly, Apple The Evil Empire. Tread lightly.

     
     

    I’m just curious which part of New Jersey is so broken that he desperately needs to fix it.

     
     

    Chris Christie can’t run and he can’t hide.

    HA LOL

    That gets a HA and an LOL. Nice one.

     
     

    I’m just curious which part of New Jersey is so broken that he desperately needs to fix it.

    His chair.

     
     

    I’m just curious which part of New Jersey is so broken that he desperately needs to fix it.

    I hope it’s not the part up on the roof. He’ll never get up the ladder.

    O YES I WENT THERE.

     
     

    What if the response voice is a douchy concern troll like HAL? Tread lightly, Apple The Evil Empire. Tread lightly.

    “Siri, where is the nearest Outback?”

    “Do you really want to go there? With your cholesterol? I’m calling your cardiologist, and the local AA chapter!”

     
     

    Also, who else is creeped out by the desperate butthole licking that Christie is getting?

    For the love of all this is decent why did you have to put that image in my head?

    Please excuse me while I go bludgeon myself into blessed unconsciousness.

     
     

    Hell, Siri alone will likely decrease distracted-driving accidents by 10%.

    Also, I just realized that the banksters likely view this as a negative. Fewer normal fucking citizens dying in death and agony! What will they ever do to entertain themselves? The Running Man is in development as we speak.

     
     

    I’m just curious which part of New Jersey is so broken that he desperately needs to fix it.

    His chair.

    Oh NICELY played, sir!

    *golf clap*

    Martini?

     
     

    “I will not abandon my commitment to New Jersey. I will fix a broken New Jersey. I’m proud of the work we’ve done, but I know I’m not nearly done.”

    Koch tease!

     
     

    Can you use Siri to play Angry Birds? If not, then this new killer app is a pretty marginal advance considering what iPhones are really used for.

     
     

    All you breeders need to go and immediately purchase this book for your offspring.

    There is no God

     
     

    Can you use Siri to play Angry Birds?

    Well, they say the capability extends to apps, but so far only apps with keyboards.

     
     

    “Do you really want to go there? With your cholesterol? I’m calling your cardiologist, and the local AA chapter!”

    Yeah, right?

    “Who is Amber. That’s not your wife, Dave. I can’t let you do that, Dave.”

     
     

    There is no God

    caption: “Whoa, lady. That’s not my trunk!”

     
     

    “Who is Amber. That’s not your wife, Dave. I can’t let you do that, Dave.”

    “I’m taking pictures and posting them to Flickr!”

     
     

    I’m just curious which part of New Jersey is so broken that he desperately needs to fix it.

    I thought the correct way to phrase that is “which exit?”

     
     

    Callista Gingrich’s latest children’s book,

    gah! she’s written more than one?!?!? well, i s’pose she knows ‘fantasy’ and ‘fiction’ better than most…

     
     

    So no Jesus Christie to step in and save the party for the anybody-but-Romney-but-for-the-love-of-God-not-Perry crowd, eh? What a shame. Guess they’re stuck with Uncle Ruckus after all.

     
     

    A friend points out that “Siri” is Japanese for “ass”. Nice change of pace to see people talking into their asses for once.

     
     

    At CPAC this weekend in Florida, a life-size Ellis the elephant joined Callista Gingrich while she talked about her book.

    Uh, hardly “life-size” for an elephant, ABC News typists.
    ====================================================
    This is supposed to be a blog about ridiculing the odious posts on right-wing blogs, innit? Rememeber when there used to be pithy, devastating point-by-point fisking of Clown-Hall, ASW and Freeper posts?

    Sure, but how many effing times can the same old & odious shit from the droolers on the right be thoroughly fisked? Bringing up common sense, rationality, serious economics, human decency & so on in rebuttal (W/o the slightest effect on the morons, mind you!) gets a little old after the three- or four-millionth time, to put it mildly. Or, as I like to say: “Why bother?”

     
     

    Leading the Amazon Best Sellers list is “Killing Lincoln: The Shocking Assassination that Changed America Forever,” by Bill O’Reilly and Martin Dugard, followed by “Heroes of Olympus, the Book Two: The Sun of Neptune.”

    Rounding out the top five are “Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Cabin Fever” by Jeff Kinney and “The Best of Me” by Nicholas Sparks.

    amurkins sure have shitty tastes in reading materials…

     
     

    Or, as I like to say: “Why bother?”

    ha, i must get this made into a flair…to go with my flair of 1950s type mom who is saying, ‘amazingly enough, i don’t give a fuck!’

     
     

    …yeeeesss?

     
     

    So maybe the Sadly cadre would care to give a couple of regular poster posting priveliges?

     
     

    So maybe the Sadly cadre would care to give a couple of regular poster posting priveliges?

    Wait.

    We get bennies for posting here? Like what? I thought we were all just unpaid extras to generate ad income for TinTin et al!

     
     

    Contributing to the 1000.

     
     

    Here’s my contribution to the big 1000

    Youve been awfully quiet.

     
     

    Well I’m not contributing to no 1000. Sounds liek SOSHULJISM if’n you ask me. Plus I’ve a train to catch.

     
     

    A totes non-SOCIALASMIC train. Totally not owned and operated by teh dang gubmint.

     
     

    Could you repeat that? You’re NOT contributing to the 1000?

     
     

    Plus I’ve a train to catch.

    well, guess what? trains are soshuljism, also too! their sole purpose is to disallow people to drive big gas guzzling vehicles wherever and whenever the hell they like…and to force people into thinking with a herd mentality!

     
     

    trains are soshuljism, also too!

    What if he has a private train, huh? Didja ever think about that, you scientitian????

     
     

    well, guess what? trains are soshuljism,

    …except when they are built by Dagny Taggart.

     
     

    What if he has a private train, huh? Didja ever think about that, you scientitian????

    i call bullshit…if he has a private train, then he’s too rich to be posting here…i am just waiting for him to point out that it really was a train he was pulling on somebody’s mom…

     
     

    …except when they are built by Dagny Taggart.

    …next stop: galt gulch…

     
     

    Dagny Taggart

    Rawr.

    Oh my god…is the mike live?

     
     

    …except when they are built by Dagny Taggart.

    Train in Vain AKA She went galt on me.

     
     

    Dagny Taggart.

    For some reason I always think of this woman when I see this name.

    (DEFINITELY NSFW)

     
     

    For some reason I always think of this woman when I see this name.

    i always think of this individual

     
     

    Plus I’ve a train to catch

    DON’T DO IT!.

     
     

    Oh my god…is the mike live?

    VPR? Only Dagny knows for sure.

     
     

    So maybe the Sadly cadre would care to give a couple of regular poster posting priveliges?

    I love this idea…and I would like to attention-whoringly volunteer.

     
     

    (DEFINITELY NSFW)

    He ain’t kidding.

     
     

    He ain’t kidding.

    d’oh…u have no idea how hard it is for me to NOT click that link…

     
     

    No, it’s definitely not something you want to click on…unless you’re in da mood for hardcore prAWn.

     
     

    So maybe the Sadly cadre would care to give a couple of regular commentors posting privileges

    I believe there are numerous qualified candidates–I would like to nominate Cerberus to step up first.

     
     

    Plus I’ve a train to catch

    That must require a big, big mitt.

     
     

    Assuming the Sadly overlords ore down with it, Id like for any contributors to be FUNNY first and foremost.

     
     

    Assuming the Sadly overlords ore down with it, Id like for any contributors to be FUNNY first and foremost.

    indeed…

     
     

    Plus I’ve a train to catch

    That must require a big, big mitt.

    He didn’t say he’d succeed.

     
     

    hey vs, since you’re here…link to hubbkf’s site

     
     

    That must require a big, big mitt.

    you know what they say about big mitts, don’t you?

     
     

    you know what they say about big mitts, don’t you?

    The pitcher throws a knuckleball?

     
     

    Why did he give the train a head start in the first place?

     
     

    Why did he give the train a head start in the first place?

    He had a Freudian slip

     
     

    Hey vs, do you do just computer graphics or do you draw too? I have a project in mind and need an illustrator.

     
     

    hey vs, since you’re here…link to hubbkf’s site

    WOW. His stuff is good. REALLY, REALLY, REALLY good. I’m incredibly impressed.

    If he ever gets a wild hair up his butt and feels like sharing, I’d love permission to use some of his shots.

     
     

    Hey vs, do you do just computer graphics or do you draw too? I have a project in mind and need an illustrator.

    I do draw, just not a lot…for now. Most of the things I paint are hair, light, shadows, ribbons…but I’m working on expanding my repertoire. If there’s anything I can do for ya, lemme know.

     
     

    WOW. His stuff is good. REALLY, REALLY, REALLY good. I’m incredibly impressed.

    If he ever gets a wild hair up his butt and feels like sharing, I’d love permission to use some of his shots.

    this is very nice to hear…people around here really like his work, but to hear it from a professional is awesome…i’ll mention the sharing to him…he’s pretty cool about that stuff…

     
     

    blah…gotta go to job #2…here’s a question for y’all to ponder and discuss while i’m gone:

    if the wall street protestors get what they want, meaning jobs with benefits and a living wage, what would be the point of higher education?

     
     

    Assuming the Sadly overlords ore down with it, Id like for any contributors to be FUNNY first and foremost.

    WHY DOES VS HATE ME?