And Watergate Was Actually The Howard Johnson Hotel’s Fault

Shorter White Street Journal:
News and Its Critics

  • In our completely objective opinion, the so-called scandal involving phone hacking is really the fault of Scotland Yard and media hungry politicians and not at all the fault of the many fine editors and reporters such as ourselves who work for the Murdoch press operations.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


 

Comments: 304

 
 
 

In other news, the WSJ reported today that too much government regulation caused the 2008 economic collapse and Iraq totally had an atomic bomb ready to drop on Israel.

 
 

Better yet was the Kaplan Post, which argued that if it wasn’t for those pesky anti-hacking laws, Murdoch wouldn’t have been forced to break the law.

Makes you wonder what’s been going on at the Post. Or alternately, what dirt Murdoch’s got on them.

I don’t hold out too much hope for the scandal to really catch fire here because we don’t punish wealthy or powerful people or corporations in this country. But it’s crystal clear that News Corp is in violation of the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act at the very minimum, and if there was any investigation into Murdoch’s US properties, I’m sure we’d find the same kind of stuff went on at Fox and the Post and possibly the WSJ as well. Murdoch’s US properties have never made their bullying a secret, and any outfit that so publically broadcasts its disdain for fairness and ethics is about 100% guaranteed to have violated the law. Because if you don’t value fairness and ethics as a general principle, they don’t mean any more to you just because laws have been enacted to uphold them.

 
Spearhafoc, who loves ya, baby
 

Fourth!

 
 

Bwahahaha! It’s no scandal because it’s a British scandal, it’s a tabloid scandal, it’s an old scandal, it involves dirty politicians, it’s just a few bad apples, the liberal meanies went after poor Bob Novak, and where is freedom of the press if we have to lower ourselves to be investigated for actual, you know, crimes. All that’s missing is the empty pledge to “punish the wrongdoers”.

 
Spearhafoc, who loves ya, baby
 

is really the fault of Scotland Yard

Murdoch should hire Sherlock Holmes. Surely, he could get to the bottom of this mystery and clear Murdoch’s good name.

 
Spearhafoc, who loves ya, baby
 

Gocart Mozart already posted this on the last thread, but I think it bears repeating.
What if Rupert Murdoch hadn’t been born.

 
 

Alternate shorter: “All the other kids are doing it.”

Alternate alternate shorter: “WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

 
 

It is also worth noting the irony of so much moral outrage devoted to a single media company, when British tabloids have been known for decades for buying scoops and digging up dirt on the famous.

The difference being that the tabloids staring me in the face when I wait in line at CVS aren’t out to influence the course of nations. The day their owner becomes the cornerstone of the Republican Party and a spectral presence at every British cabinet meeting in the last couple decades, let me know. Until then, I’ll continue to be slightly more concerned about NewsCorp.

 
 

Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how journalists gather the news?

I will now quote from the book of Profits, Chapter 2, Verses 3-6:

3Regulations, by definition, restrict something we want to do with abandon. 4God alone has the power and authority to restrict our behavior. 5God is The Invisible Hand of The Market. 6Regulation is of the devil.

 
Smiling Mortician
 

It is also worth noting the irony of so much moral outrage devoted to a single media company, when British tabloids have been known for decades for buying scoops and digging up dirt on the famous.

Ow! Strawman hit me in the head moving those damn goalposts so fast.

 
 

Jennifer said,

July 18, 2011 at 14:43

I would love to massage this comment’s feet.

.

 
 

/tip o’ the hat to HTP’s alicublog gag.
.

 
 

At least three British investigations into phone-hacking and payments to police and others by the now-shuttered News of the World tabloid are underway, with 10 arrests so far. News Corp. and its executives have apologized profusely and are cooperating with authorities. Phone-hacking is illegal, and it is up to British authorities to enforce their laws. If Scotland Yard failed to do so adequately when the hacking was first uncovered several years ago, then that is more troubling than the hacking itself.

Uh huh. Go on. Maybe after the missing disclaimer.

 
 

If Scotland Yard failed to do so adequately when the hacking was first uncovered several years ago, then that is more troubling than the hacking itself.

This may relate to the space/time coordinates wherein Irony was shived in the back and had its lifeless body dumped in a dumpster.

.

 
 

O. M. G.

While I am generally sympathetic to teh argument about gubmint censoring teh press – teh WSJ has just made me less so.

The last time the liberal press demanded a media prosecutor, it was to probe the late conservative columnist Robert Novak in pursuit of White House aide Scooter Libby. But the effort soon engulfed a reporter for the New York Times, which had led the posse to hang Novak and his sources. Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how journalists gather the news?

Uh – wait. That “reporter for teh New York Times” is Judy Miller, right? Your example is not exactly helping your case there.

 
 

“Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how journalists gather the news?”

Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how the military prosecutes war?

Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how police bring criminals to justice?

Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how the President runs the Executive Branch?

 
 

Ow! Strawman hit me in the head moving those damn goalposts so fast.

The accumulation of Strawmen on the Intertubes threatens a conflagration that would make Tunguska Jealous.

.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

First this:

Phone-hacking is illegal, and it is up to British authorities to enforce their laws.

then this:

Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how journalists gather the news?

I’m confused. Does the WSJ want “how journalists gather the news” to be policed, or not?

 
 

Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how journalists gather the news?

Does anybody want the gubmint sniffin’ through our panty drawer?

Imma gonna take of this suit, anyone have a pair of swimming trunks? Also too, Imma gonna need to slather myself in lard to ward off the cold whilst I swim to the shore, and too I will require a pork-chop necklace for luck…Thank you.

/Splash

 
 

It is also worth noting the irony of so much moral outrage devoted to a single media company, when British tabloids have been known for decades for buying scoops and digging up dirt on the famous.

Does this even make sense? Are people outraged about tabloids being tabloids or at the phone hacking and that they fucking deleted a murdered girl’s messages?

 
 

OT: Herman Cain Says Communities Have The Right To Ban Mosques Because Muzzies Are Evil And Dangerous.

Always sad when a member of a minority turns out to be a raging bigot. It also confirms that our differences really as skin deep.

I’ve said before that this guy could be our generation’s Charles Coughlin, a member of an unpopular minority cozying up to the bigots by joining them in bashing other, even more unpopular minorities. Looks like the fucknozzle’s all set to prove me right.

 
 

there’s nothing better than an extended whine about how “they” unfairly say mean things, without bothering to cite any actual statements.

 
 

Someone on Steve Douchey’s show was blaming all this on teh hacking. As my son said, that’s like blaming a murder on Murder.

 
 

When News Corp. and CEO Rupert Murdoch secured enough shares to buy Dow Jones & Co. four years ago,…

Secured…makes it sound like work or something, like the honest labor of a hard working, salt of the earth, kinda guy.

these columns…
While protection of the 1st amendment is guaranteed, this sounds like a plea to protections provided by the 13th and 14th amendments.

…welcomed our new owner and promised to stand by the same standards and principles we always had.
And by standards and principles, we mean continuing to provide cover for the comfortable while afflicting the afflicted.

That promise is worth repeating now that politicians and our competitors are using the phone-hacking years ago at a British corner of News Corp. to assail the Journal, and perhaps injure press freedom in general.

Something something, like before, and…What did you say…MY RIGHT TO EXTEMPORANEOUS LIES BY OMISSION SHALL NOT BE INFRINGED!!!!!111.
.

 
 

there’s nothing better than an extended whine about how “they” unfairly say mean things, without bothering to cite any actual statements.

“They” are responsible for all sorts of evils. If it weren’t too hypocritical even for the News Corps types, I’d expect the WSJ to blame it all on “The Man.”

 
 

As my son said, that’s like blaming a murder on Murder.

You gots a good kid there. Raised him well.

/tips hat
.

 
 

“I’ve said before that this guy could be our generation’s Charles Coughlin”

Yeah. And how sad is that?

 
 

‘Course, we also have our Hearst, too.

 
 

“They” are responsible for all sorts of evils. If it weren’t too hypocritical even for the News Corps types, I’d expect the WSJ to blame it all on “The Rabistani’s, Messicans and shiftless and lazy Negros.”

Fixxored and appointed with appropriate flair!

.

 
 

Yeah. And how sad is that?

Sad, but predictable.

Unfortunately, one of the best measures of how integrated and secure a minority feels in the U.S. is to look at how many of them are Republican. (In the black community, that’s still a tiny amount, but I could see that changing in time, and people like Cain would be leading the charge).

 
 

‘Course, we also have our Hearst, too.

We gots us a bakers dozen of ’em at least.

Actually that is an exaggeration. IIRC, 6 corporations own 95 percent of the Media.

Hyperbole, how does it work?
.

 
 

Hyperbole, how does it work?

The simplest version is xy = c.

 
 

Unfortunately, one of the best measures of how integrated and secure a minority feels in the U.S. is to look at how many of them are Republican.
The only one I can think of off of the top of my head would be the first generation Cuban immigrant community in southern Florida. Other than that, given that most of the “ethnic immigrants” have been assimilated into the “White Fold”, I am lacking other examples, not that your point is without merit.

(In the black community, that’s still a tiny amount, but I could see that changing in time, and people like Cain would be leading the charge).

Not gonna happen, we can smell the stink of racism and privilege a mile a fucking way.

You might find a brother or sister who likes the fact that Godfathers pizza is cheap, but I would dare you to find one who thinks it is Awesome. As long as Cain and Clarence, Keyes and Steele, are representing the ‘Publican party there will be no there, there.

.

 
 

A tabloid’s excesses don’t tarnish thousands of other journalists.

um, yes it does…it doesn’t make them all guilty, but, in the name of professional accountability, journalists as a group have now been (well, not just this instance) touched by scandal…just like the paparazzi and princess di…

it’s not like professional journalists have been viewed in the best light ever anyway…so, don’t make florid excuses…rectify the wrong, re-state your principles and get on with it…

 
 

Poor shiftless moochers and their endless thirst for the latest juicy celebrity gossip caused this. There is nothing about these unfortunate incidences that can’t be fixed by greater consolidation and another round of tax cuts.

 
 

The simplest version is xy = c.

This sounds sexy, back in a min…

Consider the equation xy=c , i.e.
$\displaystyle y = \frac{c}{x},$ (1)

where c is a non-zero real constant. Such a dependence between the real variables x and y is called an inverse proportionality.

The graph of (1) may be inferred to be a hyperbola, because the curve has two asymptotes (see asymptotes of graph of rational function) and because the form…

Anything with two asymptotes has got to be HOT!!!

Seriously though, I got geometry and basic algebra, but advanced alg and trig kinda triggered the triptophan reaction. I get Conic sections like the parabola and the hyperbolic.

I should take advantage of the fact that I have a housemate that is a math tutor.

In any event nice answer…
/golf clap
.

 
 

um, yes it does…it doesn’t make them all guilty, but, in the name of professional accountability, journalists as a group have now been (well, not just this instance) touched by scandal…just like the paparazzi and princess di…

it’s not like professional journalists have been viewed in the best light ever anyway…so, don’t make florid excuses…rectify the wrong, re-state your principles and get on with it…

For this comment I would like to prepare a hot bath sprinkled with rose petals…
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Spearhafoc, who is quoting the Major-General Song
 

I get Conic sections like the parabola and the hyperbolic.

In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolus.

 
 

Uh – wait. That “reporter for teh New York Times” is Judy Miller, right?

Gee (not g), I wonder what Judy is up to since the NYT fired her?

Ms. Miller is an adjunct fellow at the Manhattan Institute and a commentator for Fox News.
~

 
 

Poor shiftless moochers and their endless thirst for the latest juicy celebrity gossip caused this. There is nothing about these unfortunate incidences that can’t be fixed by greater consolidation and another round of tax cuts.

I want to get to second base with this comment!
😉
.

 
 

The only one I can think of off of the top of my head would be the first generation Cuban immigrant community in southern Florida. Other than that, given that most of the “ethnic immigrants” have been assimilated into the “White Fold”, I am lacking other examples, not that your point is without merit.

Well, traditionally, Vietnamese Americans too (for the same reasons as the Cubans), and there are others: Muslim Americans were a hugely Republican demographic up until 9/11 and the ensuing backlash.

But I’m mostly talking about the people who were assimilated into the “white fold,” e.g. the Irish, the Italians, the Poles, and European Catholics in general. They were the single strongest source of Democratic support in the North practically forever, but started integrating halfway through the 20th century and many became Nixon and Reagan voters. Today, their voting patterns are the same as the American population overall, and they produce tons and tons of Gooper bastards.

 
 

Boy, this is rich:

“We shudder to think what the Journal would look like today without the sale to News Corp.”

I’m shuddering as I read this crybaby column, thinking of what has happened to the WSJ, which was once a respected source of 1.) Business News, & 2.) Conservative Opinion, but is now shit-sliding into the stinky and gooey world of tabloid scandal.

Correction: I am not really shuddering because I don’t own any NWSA stock.

 
 

I saw The Undefeated over the weekend. It was a pretty good movie actually.

 
 

To be honest, other than The Guardian, I get the feeling a LOT of outlets are going to treat this whole issue with kid gloves for the most part.

I would bet almost anything some of them have either done the same thing Murdoch’s operation has, or know that the Murdoch team has dirt on someone at their publication/station. There is simply too many outlets

While I really, really will feel bad for the low-totem-pole folks who will get screwed over in this whole mess, it will be nice to see one of the sleaziest, disgusting, most morally reprehensible people currently around be brought down — and brought down hard.

 
 

I saw The Undefeated over the weekend. It was a pretty good movie actually.

I saw Alien. It reminded me of Sarah Palin.

 
 

The simplest version is xy = c.

For us sciencey types c is the speed of light, k is for undefined constants.

And we all know the simplest version of hyperbole is Liberal Fascism.

 
 

For us sciencey types c is the speed of light, k is for undefined constants.

For us engineery types k is “kilo” and youse all a bunch of pansies.

 
 

But I’m mostly talking about the people who were assimilated into the “white fold,” e.g. the Irish, the Italians, the Poles, and European Catholics in general.

I figured that is to what you were referring. Thanks for clarification.
.

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

For us sciencey types c is the speed of light, k is for undefined constants.

‘Cept in muslimgebra, where ‘a’, ‘b’, and ‘c’ are commonly used.

 
 

I saw The Undefeated over the weekend. It was a pretty good movie actually.

Tell us what you really think?

For us sciencey types c is the speed of light, k is for undefined constants.

That was my first thought as well.

And we all know the simplest version of hyperbole is Liberal Fascism.

This, also, too.
.

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

*lights up a Galois, peers smugly*

 
 

For us engineery types k is “kilo”

LOL You guys still use pounds, feet, and inches. Don’t try to BS with those metric prefixes.

 
 

x=300kps(approx) times y=1000 equals c

 
 

LOL You guys still use pounds, feet, and inches.

So? Look in any ‘merkin civil engineering textbook: “kips” = kilopounds = 1000# = 0.5T.

 
 

*lights up a Galois, peers smugly*

I used to smoke that sexy dark shit from the roll yer own pouches…Now if only I could find papers with the dollar sign imprinted on them…A Gualting I could go.
.

 
 

“kips” = kilopounds

So to bolster your point you pull out the Jackalope of units?

 
 

Cheer up, kid. You probably won’t flunk lunch.

 
 

I think I meant Galting, which it occurs to me should represent a plural of Libertarians.
.

 
 

So to bolster your point you pull out the Jackalope of units?

My point is that we use “k” to indicate “kilo.” I didn’t say the unit in question wasn’t an abomination.

 
 

So to bolster your point you pull out the Jackalope of units?

That created the potential for a liquid out of the nose moment, fortunately I was not drinking at the time.
.

 
 

‘Cept in muslimgebra, where ‘a’, ‘b’, and ‘c’ are commonly used.

I think that when you said muslimgebra, you meant greekometry.
.

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

(To simplify matters the term hexagon will be used in this paragraph to denote either bolt head or nut). Whitworth spanner (wrench) markings refer to the bolt diameter rather than the distance across the flats of the hexagon (A/F) as in other standards. Confusion also arises because BSF hexagon sizes can be one size smaller than the corresponding Whitworth hexagon. This leads to instances where a spanner marked 7/16BSF is the same size as one marked 3/8W. In both cases the spanner jaw width of 0.710 in, the width across the hexagon flat, is the same. However, in World War II the size of the Whitworth hexagon was reduced to the same size as the equivalent BSF hexagon purely to save metal during the war, and they never went back to the old sizes afterwards. Thus it is today uncommon to encounter a Whitworth hexagon which takes the nominally correct spanner. Spanners in this case may be marked 7/16BS to indicate that they have a jaw size of 0.710 in and are designed to take either the (later) 7/16 BSW or 7/16 BSF hexagon. The table here [1] illustrates the differences between the old and new hexagon standards.

Just sayin.

 
kappa kappa wong
 

I certainly still use my inches

 
 

For us sciencey types,,, k is for undefined constants.

Boltzmann haz a sad.

 
 

Boltzmann haz a sad.

I believe, sir, you mean Zombie Boltzmann. Good day, sir!

 
 

Good day to you too, sir!

My point is that we use “k” to indicate “kilo.”

Excepting when you’re using M’s. MBTU? WTF type of unit is that. and MMBTU?!?! Now you’re just being silly.

 
 

MBTU?

That’s moving shit. I live in a static world, remember?

 
 

Just sayin.

I still remember the day I discovered the difference between “nominal” and “dimensional”. “You mean a 2 by 4 is, in fact, not 2″ by 4″??”

I was 10 (nominally) but I was sure I was being cheated.

 
kappa kappa wong
 

Is there something wrong with MBTU per episode of Coronation Street per kettle?

 
 

I live in a static world, remember?

Mustly be awfully stuffy buildings with no HVAC.

 
 

Also too, mil? Really? Now you’re just making shit up to confuse folks and serve as lame excuses not to go metric.

 
 

Wait… 2 by 4s aren’t 2″ x 4″?

What the heck size are they then? I iz demanding of a splanation.

 
 

Mustly be awfully stuffy buildings with no HVAC.

I never actually go in any of the buildings we work on. What am I, an idiot?

 
 

I saw The Undefeated over the weekend. It was a pretty good movie actually.

Tell us what you really think?

Obviously all the people in the theater were big Sarah fans and in tribute to Caribou Barbie they all walked out half way through the movie.

 
 

The article itself?

Feh & meh, I say! Paint-by-numbers rhetorical sebum that (as has been smartly noted above) is so inept that it makes a Journalism Boner within the same paragraph. Yes, kids, there was a time when the WSJ actually often didn’t suck this hard on some ripe roadkill-choad … but that was before their triumphant return to #1 (in sales)(in a newspaper market they helped to turn terminally moribund)!

The comments?

PURE DISTILLED HIGH-FRIGGIN-LARITY WITH TEH LID OFF.

File under – Denying Them My Essence Is The Key, Mandrake:

Truth causes freedom. Those who seek to make us less free must control our access to the truth.

In this case, Leftists who hate FoxNews see an opportunity to limit our access to objective truth.

… which keeps leaving us the objectively least-clued-in NORPS in the USA. STUPIDITY, FUCK YAEH!

File under – I See What You Pimped There:

Egad, where’s the shame?

If asked to pen this “commentary,” I would resign first.

Attention! Major burn clean-up on Aisle Five!

File under – On MY World All The Ponies Poop Credit Cards:

This is going to go on for a long time, and it won’t be evidentiary–kind of like the way the left attacked Bush, Cheney, John Wong, and their other perceive enemies.

The left, in particular, can’t stand any educated, articulate opponents of liberal orthodoxy. In their world, anybody with any brains couldn’t possibly be a conservative.

Yes, who can forget where they were when Nelson Mandela went on CNN to cast his impassioned approbrium on the grotesque cavalcade of sinister show-trials that sentenced Bush, Cheney, Rice & all the many other innocent victims of its malevolent machinations to life in prison? Also, I suppose I’m now officially a bona-fide chronic redneck, because I’d get an epic blast out of trading viewpoints with a conservative bright enough to elucidate & logically validate their ideology. Pity it’s been an ever-increasingly nihilistic & barbaric anachronism since before I was born. P0body’s Nerfekt!

Always sad when a member of a minority turns out to be a raging bigot.

I found out living on a Reserve that some First Nations people are serious fucking racists. Sadly, honkies do not have a functional monopoly on this particular social resource, unlike a few others.

 
 

Wait… 2 by 4s aren’t 2? x 4??

What the heck size are they then? I iz demanding of a splanation.

Originally, they were exactly 2″ by 4″ when they left the sawmill and were set up to dry. After they dried (and shrank) they were planed smooth. So they’d be 1-1/2″ by 3-1/2″ when sold. Now we kiln-dry lumber, so they could be the right size, but that would screw up EVERYTHING already in existence, so they cut them to 1-5/8″ by 3-5/8″ or so and plane them to size.

 
 

Is there something wrong with MBTU per episode of Coronation Street per kettle?

Only since international syndication. The altitude conversions are mindboggling.

 
 

Originally,,,

Pffft. A likely story. Much moar probable is that lumber men were using it as a way to justify the exaggerations about teh size of their tools.

 
 

Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
July 18, 2011 at 18:32

Also too, mil?

Sorry boss, elec-tricky speaking, a mil is part of the parameter circular mil – cm and its one o’ the ways we designate wire.

Also, too,

Originally, they were exactly 2? by 4? when they left the sawmill and were set up to dry. After they dried (and shrank) they were planed smooth. So they’d be 1-1/2? by 3-1/2? when sold. Now we kiln-dry lumber, so they could be the right size, but that would screw up EVERYTHING already in existence, so they cut them to 1-5/8? by 3-5/8? or so and plane them to size.

I been doing this building shit thing for a while and while, admittedly, I never asked the question, I did not know that – Thanks Mr. N_B! Time to regale the fellas after lunch with this pearl…

TTFN

 
 

Don’t try to BS with those metric prefixes.

eurotrash units

 
 

How can they ingest all that Murdoch cock without gagging?

 
 

I certainly still use my inches

plural? i dont think so!

 
 

The Whitworth Hexagon Reduction – NEVAR FORGET.

 
 

The Schadenfreude is so thick you can’t cut it with a chainsaw. Especially redolent are lectures about journalistic standards from publications that give Julian Assange and WikiLeaks their moral imprimatur.

Yes, revealing documents relating to a fraudulent war is just like hacking into the phone of a 13-year-old murder victim!

 
 

Sorry boss, elec-tricky speaking,

Speaking of circular – one thousand cmils is a kcmil. It’s also an Mcmil which is bloody stupid. You’d have been just as well off calling it 5.06E23 outhouses.

Really, I dunno why all y’all have such problems with Metric. Also too, Emily Haines is ridiculously hawt.

 
 

5.06E23 outhouses.

I think there’s a mole in the outhouse organization.

Really, I dunno why all y’all have such problems with Metric.

Eurosocialist.

 
kappa kappa wong
 

plural? i dont think so!

Didn’t N__B just explain that measurements were taken before shrinkage?

 
 

I found out living on a Reserve that some First Nations people are serious fucking racists. Sadly, honkies do not have a functional monopoly on this particular social resource, unlike a few others.

Fortunately the First Nations people don’t have an institutionally backed source of power to implement said racial resentments.
.

 
 

Hating on those that oppress you or hating on those you oppress?

Which one makes more sense?

.

 
 

Gahh. See this is what happens when you’re trying to convert between all sorts of ridiculous units. Teh kcmil is not 5.06E23 outhouses, but rather 5.07E27 outhouses.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

How can they ingest all that Murdoch cock without gagging?

It’s a lot of money…

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

How many RCH’s is that?

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

Also too, Emily Haines is ridiculously hawt.

How many milliHelens?

 
 

Granted, not the plumpest of Mangoes, but I do find the continued conflation of Murdoch and Soros rather sad…

I wonder if someone followed Soros money it would lead to the down fall of World News? I have a deep feeling this is the left trying to shut up Fox News before the election.. Shame Shame Shame

Kind of like defending Bill O’Reilly or Rush Limbaugh by citing Ward Churchill.
.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Holy crap, breaking news.

I think we’ve just tumbled down the rabbit hole.

 
 

Testing

stuff goes in here

Alrighty then.

 
 

Hoare alleged in an interview with the BBC that World editor Andy Coulson had asked him personally to hack into phone accounts. Coulson was later hired to be the director of communications for British Prime Minister David Cameron, who was said to have met with Murdoch officials 26 times in his first 15 months in office.

Hoare in recent weeks has proved a source second-to-none in the ongoing hacking scandals, speaking with reporters at The New York Times and The Guardian about how News Corp. employees were able to obtain GPS location data from any phone they wanted to, simply by bribing police.

…Hoare was reportedly fired from The World over drug and alcohol problems and had been in rehab therapy. There were no indications that authorities were treating his death as suspicious, but the timing of his death is likely to keep the questions he raised at the forefront as the investigation begins.

Holy Crap indeed…I’m sure it is just a coinkydink…Nuthin to see here…Move along.
.

 
 

How many milliHelens?

If’n you count boats launched from cottage docks on summer weekends in Canuckistan, it’d be megaHelens.

 
 

Soccer leads straight to hell, according to conservative activist Billy Bob Neck, because it prevents you from using all of your God-given body parts.

Furthermore, the “Satanic” game is played by Europeans, Mexicans, “Mexicans from Brazil,” and “Mexicans from all over.”

“Think of all the communists countries that you can think of? How many of them play soccer? All of em, every single one,” he noted. “How many play football? Not one. Football – that’s a sport.”

And here I thought I was just being a good patriot enjoying the spectacular World Cup Final yesterday.

You can take in the Youtube if you dare.

Billy Bob Neck best be carrying a pointed stick, a crucifix, and wearing a garlic necklace, just to be on the safe side.
.

 
 

Holy crap, breaking news.

From the Guardian: death not being treated as suspicious by police
Also, don’t fuck with Tony Montana.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Soccer leads straight to hell, according to conservative activist Billy Bob Neck, because it prevents you from using all of your God-given body parts.

I wonder what Neck’s take on Teh Buttsecks is…

 
 

Using all of your God-given body parts…

 
 

Do our media brethren really want to invite Congress and prosecutors to regulate how journalists gather the news?

Oh, hell no. Of course, journalists (and bloggers!) should not be prosecuted for any crimes that non-journalists (or bloggers!) might be prosecuted on a routine basis.
.

 
 

Soccer leads straight to hell, according to conservative activist Billy Bob Neck, because it prevents you from using all of your God-given body parts.

Thank you! Now when will be able to speak freely about the scourge of Riverdancing?!!!!!!!!!

 
 

Does god accept trade-ins after the warranty date?

 
 

Using all of your God-given body parts…

What about the parts that were given by Satan*?

*In wingnut world, this, of course, refers to the brain.

 
 

What about the parts that were given by Satan*?

*In wingnut world, this, of course, refers to the brain.

Satan short shorts were popular in the 70s and 80s. Shiny.

 
 

As if the synchronicity of media conglomerates wasn’t clear enough; just last week on the drive home, I heard on “progressive” LA radio 1150 KTLK a message that for some reason surprised me.

On THE DAILY WRAP with Michael Castner, who breaks down the major news from the Wall Street Journal every weekday from 3pm-6pm, he had this to say in his closing remarks.

He said that any speculation about malfeasance by the WSJ is unfounded and that people claiming or insinuating such need to just stop.

OIC. Move along. Nothing to see here.

 
 

Let me just go on record as saying that it weren’t me what broke teh InteriorNetz.

 
 

What about the parts that were given by Satan*?

Please show on the doll where you were given parts by the bad man.

 
 

Billy Bob Neck is a comedian, but as per Poe’s Law it’s hard for any comedy group to be as crazy as the craziest of Real True Christians (see also: objective.jesussaves.us, Landover Baptist Church).

 
 

Tagfail of truly epic proportion. Wow.

 
 

Oh, and a little more info on Billy Bob Neck.

 
 

Ooooh, I’m gonna try a blockquote within the Tagfail of Destiny, I’ve always wanted to see paradox of universe-exploding megaquantity. W00t!!1!

 
 

Does this even make sense? Are people outraged about tabloids being tabloids or at the phone hacking and that they fucking deleted a murdered girl’s messages so that it wouldn’t be discovered that she was dead, and they could continue to suck the marrow from the story’s bones?

fixed

A tabloid’s excesses don’t tarnish thousands of other journalists.

When the other “journalists” spend their efforts producing apologias rather than rebuking said tabloid’s excesses, yeah, they kind of do.

 
 

From teh comments at the WSJ op/ed comes a link to this interesting take on, the WSJ op/ed.

And from that, a link to this, which turns up some truly damning stuff.

And while Mr. Murdoch might reasonably maintain that he did not have knowledge of the culture of permission created by Mr. Hinton and Ms. Brooks, by now he has 655 million reasons to know that Mr. Carlucci colored outside the lines.

So what became of him? Mr. Carlucci, as it happens, became the publisher of The New York Post in 2005 and continues to serve as head of News America, which doesn’t exactly square with Mr. Murdoch’s recently stated desire to “absolutely establish our integrity in the eyes of the public.”

A representative for the News Corporation did not respond to a request for comment.

 
 

Fortunately the First Nations people don’t have an institutionally backed source of power to implement said racial resentments.

They have their own courts, but plainly if they began acting like the KKK they’d be playing with a political live hand-grenade. There is some vague but ongoing cloud of suspicions that the BC interior got a mite Auschwitz-y toward its original inhabitants around 1950, & not so much as a vigorous scolding or a Book Of The Month Club expulsion ensued. Noteworthy also that in 1995 some quite awesome individuals wound up being sniped at & even attacked with an IED during the Gustafsen Lake Standoff.

Hating on those that oppress you or hating on those you oppress?

Which one makes more sense?

That’s a photo finish! After all, oppressing folks you loved would be totes yuck-o. As well as a paradox, perhaps? Sadly, the oppressed can be conned into adoring their controllers too (or duped along with the hope of getting promoted into their clubhouse).

LOL INTERNETS

 
 

k is short for contract among us legal types

 
 

hmmmm.. why are the ceiling so low on this floor?

 
 

What about the parts that were given by Satan*?

these would be the ones recommended for boycott by american men…

 
 

I love all the Soros invocations in the comments there.

Ah, the General Purpose Shadowy Jew.

 
 

hmmm

and even more hmmmand even more

 
 

“Ah, the General Purpose Shadowy Jew.”

You mean it’s not Elliot Gould?

 
 

General Purpose Shadowy Jew 2.0 – now with 30% more ylang-ylang!

 
 

I knew him way back when he was Captain Purpose Shadowy Jew and was much cooler. d00d totes lost his sense of fun.

 
 

…2.0 –

Electric BoogaJew?

 
 

General Purpose Shadowy Jew 2.0 – now with 30% more ylang-ylang!

I was really looking for something with more chootspaw.

 
 

I met him so long ago that he was Corporal Purpose Nebulous Hebrew.

Strong in the way of The WTF, that sentence is.

 
 

He did tell me about the glory days of his youth as Able Seaman Purpose Umbrous Levite. Said they were good times. I guess it does suck to get old.

 
 

Shadowy Jew 2: The Beckening.

 
 

In their world, anybody with any brains couldn’t possibly be a conservative.

Yeah, actually, that more or less sums it up. I have met conservatives with brains, but those brains are introduced to the ignore, log off and reset functions the minute the conversation switches to anything politics-related. At least for the rank-and-file voters.

Unfortunately, “politics-related” covers a lot of things.

 
 

The now dead Mr Hoare is in the very good Vanity Fair article that bbkf (I think) linked to yesterday

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Unfortunately, “politics-related” covers a lot of things.

Such as biology, climatology, geology…

 
 

Super-Shalom, loony gentlemen!

 
kappa kappa wong
 

k is short for contract among us legal types Jew.0

 
 

If you’re a true American, “K” stands for “Strikeout” because shut up ya faggy Euro-shortpants-kickball-playing faggoty fagboys anyway!

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Super-Shalom, loony gentlemen!

Ding dong dybbuk, meshugener libs!

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

True Americans™ use three K’s in succession.

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

Meanwhile, in Arkansas.

 
 

True Americans™ use three K’s in succession.

WoooooHooooo!!! Bob Gibson struck out the side!!!11

Wait-a-minute…I see what you did there.

.

 
 

Indeed.

Meanwhile, in Arkansas.

Last Monday, the council voted to ban groups from gathering or forming without city approval.

Sonja Farley, a member of the Gould City Council, said that no matter the group, if anyone meets to discuss the city, that meeting must be approved by the city.

“You can’t just come in here, get with four people and decide to start an organization,” Farley said, adding, “You will go through your city council with legal documentation and get approval.”

But Mayor Nash promised he would not sign the ordinance, calling it ludricous that he would not be allowed to meet with citizens to discuss city business.

“They can take me to court,” Mayor Nash said pointedly.

Fox 16’s Katherine Johnson said the ordinance was “extremely vague,” and encompasses “Boy Scout troups, book clubs,” and even bans families from discussing city matters at the dinner table.

Johnson said the Mayor vetoed the ordinance on a technicality, but it could be brought up at a council meeting in August and possibly made law without the Mayor’s approval.

Johnson also said that if the ordinance was passed, her interview with Mayor Nash and the city council would be illegal.

John DiPippa, Dean of the Law School at the University of Arkansas at Little Rock, expressed disbelief when he first read the proposed law.

“The truth is the city of Gould doesn’t have the authority to tell anyone that they have no right to petition them, no right to speak and no right to exist in their city,” DiPippa told Fox16.

That is some…I mean is there a version of crazy crazier than batshit…Is a wingularity opening over Arkansas, I mean Jesus H Grasshopper on a pogo stick.
.

 
 

to be fair, Gould is located literally in a fever swamp

 
 

The first rule of Gould, Arkansas…

 
 

Everybody in Gould that has a meal together has to ring up Sonja Farley and ask if it is all right to talk about the city over a meal, 3 times a day from breakfast to midnight. And golly, if you were hungry at 2am and met the spouse at the fridge, you would have to obey the law.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Damn, I was planning an S&M orgy in Gould, Arkansas, but we won’t be able to say our safe words.

Any BDSM guidelines for mimes?

 
 

to be fair, Gould is located literally in a fever swamp

The city council seem to be rodents of unusual size.

 
 

Murdoch should hire Sherlock Holmes. Surely, he could get to the bottom of this mystery and clear Murdoch’s good name.

Not available: Holmes is looking for Nicolle’s REAL killer.

 
 

Does this mean there’s going to be a new trend of “Going Gould”?

Though seriously, does this surprise anybody as the logical extension of, say, not being allowed to record police at work with cellphone cameras?

 
 

Wow! Who broke the thread’s ‘blockquote’ widget? I’m reporting this to the Sadly Police!

 
 

I am tempted to break it some more but Tintin would skullfucked me for doing so if anyone wishes to know how to break it I might be persuaded to reveal the secret.

 
 

Wow! Who broke the thread’s ‘blockquote’ widget? I’m reporting this to the Sadly Police!

It might have been me. Since I am new around hear, I’ll take the blame.

 
 

It was Jim! It was Jim! Jim broke the thread! It was him!

The Bible says we should stone him

kappa kappa wong said,
July 18, 2011 at 18:15

I certainly still use my inches

I cannot BELIEVE you people didn’t use this fat pitch for a euphenism!

*using the fat pitch*

 
 

No, no, no, no! It was UNE what broke the thread! Let’s stone HIM. Hell, let’s stone them both. Stone me, too! (Oh, wait. Already done that…)

 
 

TinTin: Fine foto-shop!

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Thread’s not broken… I just finished reading a couple of Charles Stross stories online before picking up The Fuller Memorandum, and I came back to find the thread stunned, but not dead.

 
 

It was Jim! It was Jim! Jim broke the thread! It was him!

The Bible says we should stone him

YUH oh.

Okay, nobody move or the skinny stoned geek enjoying his day off never ever unpacks another free pr0nz archive plays another videogame again!

 
 

Also … waitaminutehere.
HA HA! ALREADY STONED!

*goes into base, kills d00ds*

It would seem my pre-emptive strike has vomited a fatal spanner into your tidy little plan, has it not?

Now the snarker becomes the snarked, now cats marry ducks, now is the only game in town.

 
 

I’s mos mos sorree, jim! Thanx for the Gustafan Lake link: I enjoy reading about odd historical incidents unknown to me.

 
 

If you’re a true American, “K” stands for “Strikeout”

Word.

 
 

Any BDSM guidelines for mimes?

‘One’ if by ‘land’. ‘Two’ if by ‘sea’.

 
 

Pulling out the Jackalope.

 
 

I’ll stand in the corner so that the less accurate arms might still hit me with rebounds and ricochets.

/slinks off to corner
/has a sad

ps. its been a good life, such as it is.
.

 
 

Fox 16?s Katherine Johnson said the ordinance was “extremely vague,” and encompasses “Boy Scout troups, book clubs,” and even bans families from discussing city matters at the dinner table.

Boy Scouts troup the light fantastic.

yeesh.

 
 

Do you know what is, an Isotto Fraschini?

 
 

Back to the shannanigans—

David Wilson, Charlie Brooks’s official spokesman, told the Guardian that Charlie Brooks denies that the bag belonged to his wife. “Charlie has a bag which contains a laptop and papers which were private to him,” said Wilson.

“They were nothing to do with Rebekah or the [phone-hacking] case.”
Wilson said Charlie Brooks had left the bag with a friend who was returning it, but dropped it in the wrong part of the garage.

When asked how the bag ended up in a bin he replied: “The suggestion is that a cleaner thought it was rubbish and put it in the bin.” Wilson added: “Charlie was looking for it together with a couple of the building staff.

Hmmmm. What did that say earlier in that (short) article? scroll, scroll, sc——AH!

The car park, under a shopping centre, is yards from the gated apartment block where Brooks lives with her husband, a former racehorse trainer and close friend of David Cameron.

O.Kaaaaaay. Rich people are weird, but are they really this weird, or are they all just lousy fucking friends who are all on drugs all the time and who all carry their laptops and friend’s laptops in really shitty carrying cases and drop things like laptops off in parking garages? Either this guy is lying or the whole thing was a truly weak contrivance to produce bupkiss to “prove” that it’s all bupkiss as in nothingtoseeheremoveon. SEE??!! NO CONSPIRACY!!!

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Do you know what is, an Isotto Fraschini?

“Excuse me, young man—but isn’t that an Alfa Romeo?”

“No, Ma’am! That’s a Roi-Tan—a fine American cigar!”

 
 

Go away kid, ya bother me.

 
 

Ceasar Romero’s cousin, Alfalfa Romeo?

 
Spearhafoc, WHO IS BEOWULF!
 

Serious question: How do deaf people who are into BDSM handle the safe-word business?

 
 

Especially redolent are lectures

Redolent of what?
I am shocked, shocked! that editorial-author for the WSJ does not speak English properly.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Ceasar Romero’s cousin, Alfalfa Romeo?

You think you’re kidding…Road & Track used to have a feature in the front of the magazine with weird printed crap from around the world of automotive interest. One that stuck with me was a newspaper ad for an “Alfalfa Romero”. I can just picture somebody spelling it over and over again on the phone to the ad-taker, and that’s what came out.

Now I never knew who to blame for the column after column of “Carmen Ghias” that used to be in the ads….

 
Spearhafoc, WHO IS BEOWULF!
 

Huh?

It’s one thing to be a troll, but this is just…weird.

 
 

Let me post somewhere!!!

Free speech isn’t free.

 
 

Free speech isn’t free.

Sure it is. It’s that audience that isn’t free.

 
 

Gosh, that could not have come out any worse.

Its the audience that isn’t free. But you probably got it the first time.

I better go back to watching Little House On The Prairie.

 
 

Isotto-ing the Fraschini.

 
 

Bannon also said audiences reacted much in the same way they did at the premiere in Pella, Iowa a few weeks ago: with standing ovations. He said he intends on putting video of the positive response online.

Shorter Bannon: “As soon as I can find the paid shills, we’ll have those YouTube videos up! You’ll be sorry!”

 
Robert Zimmerman
 

Everybody must get stoned.

 
 

I better go back to watching Little House On The Prairie.

I’m stickin’ with Deadwood.

 
 

check one two…

 
 

o/t, breaking on the murdochgate:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/jul/18/sun-website-hacked-lulzsec

money quote; “The hoax story suggested Murdoch had taken the radioactive poison palladium before “stumbling into his famous topiary garden late last night”. The page later redirected to LulzSec’s Twitter account.”

and more seriously:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/jul/18/mystery-bag-bin-rebekah-brooks

“Detectives are examining a computer, paperwork and a phone found in a bin near the riverside London home of Rebekah Brooks, the former chief executive of News International….”

what would the kids on CSI make of it

 
 

UNE: S’all right. I saw where you tried to run a test of the blockquotes. I’m not a veteran Sadlie either … and I’ve seen it lock up on blockquotes and italics before.

I blame WordPress. And Hitler. Also algore is fat.

 
 

It’s one thing to be a troll, but this is just…weird.

I think there might be manic a episode going on. I hope she gets help. Meant seriously.

 
 

Pretend I didn’t transpose the words ‘a’ and ‘manic.’

 
 

This article is pure awesomeness and you must read it.

Awesome mangoes.

Anonymous | Sun, 2011-07-17 21:40

It’s amusing to me that some people still say she’s a quitter. IMO, their talk is just wishful thinking. If she really quit, they wouldn’t have to keep saying it everyday for two years. She must be doing something significant.
—–
Sarah has stood up to corrupt Republicans, and corrupt oil companies, and anybody else in order to do her job and serve the people. She did more good in two years than other governors do in a lifetime.
—–
She shows no fear of the Obama regime including the press. For three years, she has been THE target – putting herself in political harm’s way. She has shown the fortitude others can only promise.
—–
Sarah Palin 2012

and

Anonymous | Sun, 2011-07-17 17:03

After watching “The Undefeated” I am more than ready for 2012 election. I saw it on Saturday afternoon in Otange CA because friday was selling out and a long drive for me after work. I know a lot of people who want to see it but couldn’t make the drive. Sarah Palin is an incredible woman with a servants heart and my choice for President of the USA.

~

 
 

wiley, sorry, beat me to the punch, must remember to read the thread

 
 

Sarah Palin is an incredible woman with a servants heart

…which she gnaws on just before her TV appearances.

 
 

incredible woman with a servants heart
Damn zombizzles gettin in everywhere

 
 

Serious question: How do deaf people who are into BDSM handle the safe-word business?

Serious answer: Hand signals and response squeezes. Also done with harder sensory play like being gagged for a session. The “top” checks in regularly with their bottom to make sure they are still able to give consent and haven’t disappeared into scene space by checking they give two hand squeezes to two hand-squeezes by the top. May also have hand-signal safe-word while gagged or otherwise unable to say a safe word so like “making the peace sign” is a signal to break it up or the like.

Silly answer: By signing “safe word”.

 
 

Not just that, Tintin, but the WSJ also claimed their journalistic standards went up under Murdoch, instead of devolving into a hack broadsheet.

 
 

I would love to massage this comment’s feet.

Dibs on her boobs!

 
 

From the department of you can’t make this shit up.
http://thinkprogress.org/politics/2011/07/18/272289/sen-rand-paul-to-britney-spears-what-should-we-do-about-the-debt-crisis/
Last week at the congressional baseball game, Glittarazzi told Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) that Britney Spears will be in town on July 31 (conveniently right before the Aug. 2 deadline) and asked, “If you could ask her any question, what would that be?” Paul’s answer: “What should we do about the debt crisis?” In a famous 2003 interview with Tucker Carlson, Spears offered some political advice: “Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision he makes and should just support that.”

 
 

Submitted without comment:

BACHMANN: Lord, the day is at hand. We are in the last days. You are a Jehovah God. We know that the times are in your hands. And we give them to you…The day is at hand, Lord, when your return will come nigh. Nothing is more important than bringing sheep into the fold. Than bringing new life into the kingdom…You have weeded that garden. The harvest is at hand.
http://thinkprogress.org/politics/2011/07/18/264811/bachmann-predicted-world-end-2006/

 
 

We are in the last days.

Lord, I wanna be preznit in the last days so I can have NSA satellites show me the tribulations everywhere on my teevee.

 
Lurking Canadian
 

This News World scandal just proves the old adage: If we make bribing cops illegal, only criminals will bribe cops.

 
 

Nothing is more important than bringing sheep into the fold.

Clearly I’ve had my priorities all mixed up.

 
 

“Nothing is more important than bringing sheep into the fold.”

I would very much like to subscribe to your newsletter.

 
Helmut Monotreme
 

Nothing is more important than bringing sheep into the fold.
Of course there isn’t. Its an election year. Time to fleece the flock.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

Roopoo Murdoo just sed today is the most humiliating day of his life.

Now just waiting for some MP to pull out a chalk-board, sketch out a mad diagram with every arrow pointing at a picture of Roopoo, and say this evidence is sponsored by Goldline.

 
 

Not to step on Cerberus’ toes but:

Serious question: How do deaf people who are into BDSM handle the safe-word business?

Other considerations – which one is deaf, teh top or bottom or both?

There’s a bunch of ways this could be done. I’m partial to teh classic “dead man’s switch” approach where consent is demonstrated by teh bottom continuing to hold on to some item. Given teh nature of what said item represents, it’s easy to work it into scenarios and fetishize it. Usually we use your mom’s granny panties. They are so large that it’s impossible to not notice them.

 
 

Sarah Palin is an incredible woman with a servants heart

…which she gnaws on just before her TV appearances.

I forgot where I was and almost clicked “kill” looking for the “like” link.

This News World scandal just proves the old adage: If we make bribing cops illegal, only criminals will bribe cops.

Also awesome.

 
Spearhafoc, who is a disappointed breast man
 

Thanks for the answers, folks.

Dibs on her boobs!

Damn it!

Fine. I’ll settle for the butt, I guess.

 
 

I wanted nothing to do with that crazy lady.

 
 

Another MP made a big deal about Rupert going through the back door of the Prime Minister’s residence. Rupert explained, “I was asked. I just did what I was told.”

One wonders if the Prime Minister’s opening is as huge as Rick Perry’s.

 
 

Speaking of BDSM, dominating teh PENIS news scene today are whiny conservatards complaining about gubmint monies being spent on a study about teh size of ghey mens PENISes.

LOL, Obambi is all about ghey men and their PENIS sizes. Because he’s so lie-beral (which means ghey! LOLZ).

PS

But the 2009 study was funded through a 2006 grant issued during the George W. Bush administration.

 
 

Speaking of BDSM, dominating teh PENIS news scene today are whiny conservatards complaining about gubmint monies being spent on a study about teh size of ghey mens PENISes.

Gentlemen, we must move quickly to prevent the development of a PENIS gap!

 
Spearhafoc, whose penis is so small he can't even measure it due to the Heisenberg uncertainty principle
 

My epic smallness is probably skewing the average.

 
 

a study about teh size of ghey mens PENISes.

Spearhafoc, whose penis is so small he can’t even measure it due to the Heisenberg uncertainty principle said,

My epic smallness is probably skewing the average.

All that Christina Hendricks guff was just a bluff to be accepted here among the manly men. And manly ladies.

 
 

Christina Hendricks guff

That’s rather familiar on your part.

 
 

Teh butthurt in teh comments at teh Daily Caller are laugh-a-licious. They are all “Barney Frank, Barney Frank, Barney Frank”. LULZ.

Little do they know that teh plot is much much moar sinister. Teh PENIS-size research was approved in 2006 under teh Bush Administration. GWB, who as we all know is sekritly a lie-beral leftsist plant (that all true conservatives knew to be a Fakey McFake conservative all along) appointed teh NIH Director who was in charge at teh time. And who was that? A prominent muslim dude!

THAT’S RIGHT it’s an Islamic terror-plot to measure gay PENISes in order to spread Shania Law!!eleventy-ones1! WAKE UP SHEEPLES!

 
 

At the same time, Undefeated isn’t the usual release and may not play by the rules.

ohhhhh…so it’s a MAVERICK film…

 
 

that shut up crazy lady.

how tbogg should tag his ‘one l’ bachmann posts

 
 

Hey! Rupert Murdoch is stealing my schtick!

 
 

THAT’S RIGHT it’s an Islamic terror-plot to measure gay PENISes in order to spread Shania Law!!eleventy-ones1! WAKE UP SHEEPLES!

omg…this made me laff…

 
 

Quite a little lulz-orgy at Casa Del jim whilst watching the Murdocholith smouldering, cracking & dissolving from the inside out.

Grounds for dispute as to whther the old cretin will go Full Putin & allow another vile, shambling thing to take his position while he informally pulls their tentacle-strings, or go Full Trig & just stick it out, or even go Full Good Roman & just suck on a loaded priceless heirloom flintlock pistol (better late than never, Rupester!) so he can take one for the team.

Poor old evil fuck thinks testifying is the most humiliating day of his life … after he’s degraded himself far worse for this long.

My lulz-gland runneth over.
Good thing I’ve got insurance.

Also, SQUIRRELZ!

 
 

Teh schaden freudes itself, jim.
~

 
 

I dunno, I keep trying to watch teh Rupoo Murdoo thang, but all I get is pie.

 
 

Rupert: “Yes, that’s right, it’s quite often that my brain doesn’t know what my tongue is saying. We have a motto here at News Corp, “Shoot first, ask questions later”. This editorial style has worked successfully for more than fifty years, and I hope it will continue to work for another fifty years. The problem seems to me to be that you people, politicians like yourselves, believe you have the integrity required to conduct this inquisition. Yes, I find this hearing quite ironic, that we are being questioned about the manner of our reporting by the most dishonest class of people on the planet. Only our styles are different, our ends are the precisely the same.”

 
 

I for one welcome my Shakira Law overlord(esses).

 
 

Only our styles are different

The only part of this statement with which I would take issue. Otherwise, sadly, all true.

 
 

I would also like to propose a new law. All persons claiming that the ecomony was in any way negatively impacted by government regulation shall immediately be slapped with a fish. HARD.

All those in favor, say sockeye.

 
 

2nded

 
 

Yeah, regardless of the veracity of the story, or of her batshittiness, Imma go with “Republican Primary Season In Full Swing. Smears-A-Poppin'”

McCain’s black baby all over again.

It’s fun to watch them try to eat each other. Total SOP for them. Sad, really, and it says volumes about how they’re unfit to govern. Alas, too few can hear.

 
 

Please slap Steve Wynn.

Casino magnate Steve Wynn yesterday blamed President Obama for weak business spending and hiring in the U.S., and said “the business community in this country is frightened to death of the weird political philosophy of the President of the United States.”

~

 
 

I don’t know, but, without hunting for mangoes, I would agree with Wynn. The idea that a Democratic President would voluntarily offer to gut Social Security and Medicare could rightfully be called a “weird political philosophy.”

 
 

Please slap Steve Wynn.

Perhaps we can get Junkpuncho’s opinion on this.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

The idea that a Democratic President would voluntarily offer to gut Social Security and Medicare could rightfully be called a “weird political philosophy.”

Wynn is shitting a brick about septuagenarians not having enough cash to feed his slot machines.

 
 

The blog writer follows up with a more intelligent assessment of one of the many reasons the economy has and will continue to stay flat…

Casino magnate Steve Wynn yesterday blamed President Obama for weak business spending and hiring in the U.S., and said “the business community in this country is frightened to death of the weird political philosophy of the President of the United States.”

The counter argument, of course, is that consumers aren’t spending like they used to and instead using their money to try to recover from a years-long spending and borrowing binge. That hurts businesses dependent on consumer spending, and holds down hiring.

Then Wynn loses it:

But in a conference call with investors Monday, Wynn says he would be very, very happy to hire more people for Wynn Resorts’ operations in Las Vegas. But Wynn said the government is standing in his way.

What Wynn says is a little less bombastic, but does blame the current debt ceiling standoff for his fear of hiring any people–which is what chickenshit business owners have been doing for 4 years now.

 
 

Casino magnate Steve Wynn yesterday blamed President Obama for weak business spending and hiring in the U.S., and said “the business community in this country is frightened to death of the weird political philosophy of the President of the United States.”

I agree that it’s weird to try to stimulate an economy with a giant tax cut package, which is what the stimulus was. So, are we and this hotel magnate back on the Keynesian train at long last, then?

 
 

Summary of Murdoch’s testimony today:
(1) NewsCorp did not do anything illegal;
(2) If the company did anything illegal, I didn’t know about it;
(3) If I did know about it, I was receiving bad advice;
(4) I would never do anything illegal or unethical; and
(5) Everyone else was doing it anyway!

Which reminds me of my favorite catchall:
(1) I never met the woman
(2) I didn’t know she was married
(3) She said she was 19!

 
 

Around here, whenever anything goes wrong we automatically respond with:

I didn’t do it! Nobody saw me. You can’t prove a thing.

 
 

Wynn is shitting a brick about septuagenarians not having enough cash to feed his slot machines.

You beat me to it.

 
 

Steve Wynn, casino owner. Do these guys get to make up their own names or what?

 
Junkpuncho the Junk-Punching Alpaca
 

Perhaps we can get Junkpuncho’s opinion on this.

Go right ahead & slap him, I’m busy punching junk. You’d have seen me on the TV if that damn pie thrower hadn’t gotten in my way.

 
Xecky Gilchrist
 

Wynn is shitting a brick about septuagenarians not having enough cash to feed his slot machines.

These dumbasses really are slow to figure out that you can’t both starve the peons and have them spend money at your goddam bidnesses. Even Nazi Punk Henry Ford had that one figured out.

 
Looch, who also has one "L" in his name but that's the end of it
 

Michele’s people gettin’ a little out of hand.

http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/07/report-bachman-aides-shove-abcs-brian-ross.php?ref=fpa

Can’t wait to see the video, which ABC says it will air.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

These dumbasses really are slow to figure out that you can’t both starve the peons and have them spend money at your goddam bidnesses.

In their defense, the 90’s were a period of economic priva- WAIT, WHAT?

Can’t wait to see the video, which ABC says it will air.

Of course, the right will spin this as victimization of Bachmann, and they will either blame “Teh Far Left” for the migrane story, or claim that Tucker Carlson, like Dubya, was a liberal plant all along.

Best outcome, both Tucker and Bachmann destroy one another.

 
 

I mean, the subject of her health is now an issue. She running for Preznit.

If her people are going to respond to legitimate questions like this, she is gonna implode.

Dagnab it.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

But… but… I thought Santorum involved lube!

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

+1 to the nhpr editors for the title.

-1 to BBBB for seemingly fucking up one of the links.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Yeah, the first link should have been more frothy. Sorry.

On the food pr0n front, I soaked a pound of dried chickpeas overnight, ground them up, threw in two onions and two heads of garlic, and a bunch of Italian parsley, and ground the mixture again. I then added a generous portion of cumin, coriander, black pepper, hot pepper, and a touch of baking powder. Houston, we have falafel! Loofah optional.

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

What, no zatar?!?! I’m shocked.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

I could whip some up, but the sumac “berries” are just coming in, and I added enough spices to the mix to let the falafel stand on its own with just a little tahini and some veggies.

 
 

for interested zombies

Thanks, kg! It was superb.

 
Sockeye Fenwick
 

Use a rotten, smelly fish…a really BIG one that requires two hands to wield. Also, I am in favor of multiple fish slaps.

 
 

Way too much potential euphemistic content in my last post. For both genders. I blame it on lack of coffee.

 
 

Hahahahahaha.

The real punchline is that they couldn’t even get a few audience members to give it a good rating (unlike say, Transformers 2, which has a 36% positive rating from critics and a 90% positive from audiences).

 
 

Even Nazi Punk Henry Ford had that one figured out.

You know, it is amazing that the fact our economy is consumer-based and for that economy to really hum along the proles need money to spend has been entirely dropped from the national discussion.

I dunno, maybe all the money is now made in the make-believe world of high finance and as long as we are all forced to by insurance, food, electricity, gas and the like, there is enough for them to slice and dice and make their dough.

Cliffotines. Now.

 
 

Steve Wynn is simply echoing the Chamber of Commerce line.

He wants the tax cuts for plutocrats, and the gutting of every single protection put in place for the proles by the New Deal and the Great Society.

In short, he’s just like Obama.
~

 
 

I read this back in January. I think it’s a pretty good assessment of the current state of affairs, business wise anyway.

 
 

The fact is, you liberals have it all backwards. Your pushining the producer class at this junkture will make them leave America for places were the talent is appreciated.

 
 

Ah, pushining it – pushining it good
Ah, pushining it – pushining it real good
Ah, pushining it – pushining it good
Ah, pushining it – p-pushining it real good

 
 

Your pushining the producer class at this junkture will make them leave America for places were the talent is appreciated.

Indeed.
~

 
 

I think it’s a pretty good assessment of the current state of affairs, business wise anyway.

Thanks. Good, quick read. The shorter? The US is no longer a market US-based multi-nationals care to invest in. The money is elsewhere.

 
 

Phu U, WP!

And more.

 
 

Ah, pushining it – pushining it good
Ah, pushining it – pushining it real good
Ah, pushining it – pushining it good
Ah, pushining it – p-pushining it real good

Well, I certainly didn’t come here tonight expecting an S&P reference. Lulz. 🙂

 
 

THIS got a higher rating on Rotten Tomatoes than “The Undefeated”.

When a hunk of disco cheese like “The Apple” rates 17 points higher than Palin’s film… that’s pretty much of an indictment. Especially given that I defy you to find me anywhere on the intertubes that gives “The Apple” a positive rating. It’s a fucking trainwreck, and people like that trainwreck more than they like Sarah The Quitter.

 
 

“Ooh, Gary Gary!”

I’m embarrassed by how giggly that makes me.

 
 

In other news, my father writes an e-mail to me for the first time in … well, years, actually… and what does he send me but this discredited load of conservative bullshit. Gee, thanks, Dad. That was so sweet.

 
Otto Von Bismarck
 

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
July 20, 2011 at 1:30

would somebody PLEASE get that boy a pony already? Wait, never mind – if it’s not a magic sparkle pony he’ll STILL be unsatisfied.

 
 

Otto, is it so much to ask for a Democratic President to stand up for the New Deal?
~

 
 

Pere Ubu,

I hope you told your father that the Boorts piece was written as a protest for his never having been invited to deliver a commencement address. He has only used it on his radio program and in his book.

 
 

the Boorts piece was written as a protest for his never having been invited to deliver a commencement address.

I can’t imagine why. It’s uplifting and inspirational: it lifted me up off the couch and inspired me to take a dump.

 
 

I’m sure ITTDGY is just waiting for Ralph Nader to crawl out from under whatever rock he’s been hiding under for the last three years so he can announce that he’s running for President again, so Obama can lose to an even worse GOP candidate than Bob Dole…

 
 

I’m sure ITTDGY is just waiting for Ralph Nader

Why not ask him what he thinks instead of telling him what you’re sure of?

 
food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus
 

Lamb sirloin steak marinating in soy sauce, garlic, herbes de Provence, mustard. ‘Twill be grilled. Couscous with dried fruits, pignoli, preserved lemon. Cauliflower florets in a parm regg. batter, fried in olive oil (h/t Marcella Hazan). Got some blueberries at the marmer’s farket that must be used … maybe I’ll make a quick “popover” (h/t Jacques Pepin) with beebleberry compote.

Maybe another martini might get in the way – we’ll hafta see.

 
 

You are cruel, food pron obsessed Emperor of Portland, Pupienus. Is there a priest in the house, we need an exorcist, a man of the cloth who can exorcise a food devil.

 
 

Steerpike, Obama is a worse GOP candidate than Bob Dole.

By the way, your Ralph Nader reference makes me laugh.

Did Ralph make Obama do this?

Did Obama appoint GOP dickwad Alan Simpson and FAUX Democrat Erskine Bowles as head of a “Bipartisan Deficit Commission” in January, 2010 because of Ralph Nader?

When we blow up kids overseas with drone strikes, do you sit around saying, “Damn those kids were lucky, at least they weren’t blown up by G.W. Bush’s drone strikes?” Does Ralph Nader make us keep doing this?

And for the halibut, here is our Preznit Transparency.

Just askin’.
~

 
 

Oops, I’ve made a double linky fail.

For the first, let’s go with this instead.
~

 
 

Yeah, you’re right. Let’s all keep attacking Obama so Rick Perry can jump in and sweep everyone off their feet, or Romney can finally buy his way into office. Make sure everyone knows how disappointed we all are so the liberals stay home. Sounds like a great way to get everything we all want.

 
 

What promotes the most lulz about the Boortz turd is the macho posturing he does in it, viz:

I’m about to be stoned by the faculty here. They’ve already changed their minds about that honorary degree I was going to get. That’s OK, though. I still have my Ph.D. in Insensitivity from the Neal Boortz Institute for Insensitivity Training. I learned that, in short, sensitivity sucks. It’s a trap. Think about it – the truth knows no sensitivity. Life can be insensitive. Wallow too much in sensitivity and you’ll be unable to deal with life, or the truth. So, get over it.

Now, before the dean has me shackled and hauled off, I have a few random thoughts.

Oooh, Mr. Internet Tough Guy stands up to the straw men and blows ’em right over!

*swoon* you could land a jumbo jet on those shoulders…

Hey, Neal! Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, nobody’s invited you to give a commencement speech because YOU’RE A FUCKING POSTURING WANKER?

 
 

Sounds like a great way to get everything we all want.

Calling out the president for doing a shitty job 200 comments into a thread at the poop joke website will cause his downfall.

 
 

I dunno, maybe all the money is now made in the make-believe world of high finance

Yeah, maybe. Remember this little nugget?

Well now. How many of those 29 companies actually MAKE STUFF?

I count two. And I’m not even sure about GE anymore.

 
 

Sounds like a great way to get everything we all want.

How about a nice game of chess?

Or perhaps tic tac toe is more your style.

Maybe the card game, War? There is no strategy, you just shuffle your cards and hope for the best.

This would still be an improvement over voting for a lying corporate war-monger like Barack Obama.
~

 
 

Calling out the president for doing a shitty job 200 comments into a thread at the poop joke website will cause his downfall.

You scoff, but I will get Gojira on my side.
~

 
 

Pupienus, I was only kidding. I dream of your dishes.

How’s that martini?

 
 

In a blender:
two fresh mangoes from my tree
the juice of six key limes from my tree
the juice of eight tangerines from my tree
two kiwi fruit from the store
two 12 ounce cans of Goya guava, papaya and pineapple nectar
one and a half cups of water
a liberal supply of coconut flavored white rum
a liberal suplly of dark rum
(I didn’t measure the rum, I just kept pouring till it tasted right)

Mix well and serve over ice in a large tiki mug.
Crank up the Bob Marley, kick back in the hammock and enjoy.

 
 

That’s some tree!

 
the conspiratist
 

Obviously, the biggest hoax so far of the 21st century:

http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/dawn/news/dawn20110716.html

 
 

Hey!
two kiwi fruit from the store
in alcoholic drinks!! For shame sir, for shame

 
 

~ 30 ~

 
 

a liberal suplly of dark rum

I thought it was the conservatives who were obsessed with Mandingo.

 
 

one and a half cups of water

Isn’t this really taking up space alcohol could occupy?

 
 

Summary of Murdoch’s testimony today:
(1) NewsCorp did not do anything illegal;
(2) If the company did anything illegal, I didn’t know about it;
(3) If I did know about it, I was receiving bad advice;
(4) I would never do anything illegal or unethical; and
(5) Everyone else was doing it anyway!

(6) Pie!

 
 

“report-bachman-aides-shove-abcs-brian-ross”

Ross has always been a pushy jerk, the kind of old-school investigative journalist that is rare these days. He also has a reputation as a panty-sniffer, so, of course, ABC had to assign him to Bachmann…..

 
 

I’m about to be stoned by the faculty here.

Do professors typically have good weed?

 
 

Calling out the president for doing a shitty job 200 comments into a thread at the poop joke website will cause his downfall.

 
Guerilla Voters Cadre 18
 

Thunder: Solidarity, bro.

 
 

That adds a light blue pinstripes to the Los Angeles Times, which first reported Perry’s account, that heavily sun screen pill damaged male armor. Book your appointment today and take your suit, then it probably is and you liked a piece but the sun screen pill double breasted jacket must always be half-an-inch to one complaint, borders on ‘S&M style
activity’. Most men prefer double breasted jacket, length of your thumb. The choice of selecting the suit, and include Bentley linings and features.

 
 

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