I do believe I’m getting the vapors.

She must’ve gotten into her old boyfriend’s stash…

She’s obviously getting axed. What a lame sounding venture. Who leaves a major network to start a web site? Maybe in 1997, but not now.

So she’s resigning from CNN in order to spend more time with her cyberstalkers? Gotcha.

And I have to disagree with the suggestion that she looks like Posh Spice. For one thing, she’s not an anorexic with tragic breast implants. And for another, she has that creepy Maria Shriver lantern jaw.

Can’t think of who she reminds me of. Hmmm….. Mark Gastineau?

Wow! My retinas are burning! What a rush! Well, I will say that her website matches the outfit she has on in that picture you have of her.

Will ingestion of psilocobin be required to read this when it opens up in Just 15 weeks It might make the experience more … mellow.

I wonder if she’ll talk about whether or not happiness is leaving your warm white whale beached at the corner of Viagra St and Oxycontin Blvd? You know, happy stuff like whether or not you need a condom when you have sex with a guy whose wood is provided by Big Pharma…

Inquiring minds…

Has anyone alerted the good Dr. Frisch?
I’m surre she would want to attend the gala opening
of Miss Kagan’s site.

Has anyone alerted the good Dr. Frisch?
I’m surre she would want to attend the gala opening
of Miss Kagan’s site.

What Ottoman Said, mostly, about any resemblance to Posh Spice. Similar hair color and having tits does not a similarity make. Maybe an aged, plastic surgeried Katrina (of ….and the Waves fame, a band not likely to play New Orleans any time soon) whose drug consumption resembles Marianne Faithful’s.

That website is designed to appeal to women? Blind ones, or just the severely colorblind?

When the next announcement comes—Rush named Head of Programming there—all will be clear.

Gus-
But now she can work on her blog! After all, all the kewl kids have one. She can hope for approving links from Glenn “Heh, indeed” Reynolds, Malkin, and Patterico-suave now. Maybe she can get crazy cat lady Deb Frisch to make the occasional appearance. Then she’ll know she’s arrived. Yep, the Skyy’s the limit.
_________
The Brief Case

I recently started going to the gym at an earlier time, so I saw a whole new schedule of cable news on the screens. I remember thinking, who’s that awful, pinched, bony, lipless woman on CNN? Then the name came up. I can’t say anything about her newcasting abilities, because I can’t read the garbled closed captioning, but, still, eep.

I can’t live if living is without you …
Wow I bet her web site will be as good as John Tesh’s radio show…

Wow.

That site is really… uh, it’s nice. That’s a really nice site, Daryn. Good… good for you, Daryn. Doing what you want. That’s a, uh… that’s a really nice message.

It is perhaps designed to appeal to women

Not this one. Jeepers.

It looks like the opening credits for one of those Eastern European “Tom & Jerry” cartoons. The ones with the wierd sound effects…

Wow. I don’t know who her designer is but someone needs to inform him/her of that amazing invention called “The Color Wheel”….after they get slapped for putting up that monstrosity. Gah!

Amazing. Great catch.

I have only one thing to say: inspiration?????

“One Woman. One Radical Idea: The World is a Good Place.”

She’s either not using “radical” the way I usually do or she doesn’t get out much. And “stop by for daily affirmations?” Like Stuart Smalley but with more clashing colors!

Nice website. I wondered what ever happened to the set designer from The Match Game.

Maybe CNN will replace her with Melissa Theuriau:

http://heyjennyslater.blogspot.com/2006/02/comment-dites-vous-giggedy-giggedy.html

I just wanted to say it before Doug does.

Take the word “radical” and totally denature it, make the “edgy” vacuous and unthreatening, god I resent this as someone half radical and all woman. “Psssst! The world is Good as it is, so you just focus on tweaking that lovely and pleasing personality.” It’s propaganda.

I just finished reading an investigative study explaining that doctors give women electroshock more frequently than they do men because women “don’t need to use their brains as much.” I thought that was a little unfair, frankly not so sure now.

_______________

Karloff v Lugosi

Yes! Melissa Theuriau! CNNs ratings would skyrocket- she wouldnt even have to speak english.

As for that website- the goggles- they do nothing! LOL! PWNDDD!!!1!!1!

Wait… this isnt Fark…

Aiiiiii! My eyes! My eyes!

If she can bang “Big Pharma” Rush and still think the world is a good place, I have nothing but boundless admiration for her.

online community dedicated to the radical idea that the world is

…a very poorly color-coordinated place.

She Always reminded me of Julia Roberts. Ironic, I know.

Daryn is a dyed-in-the-wool good girl. She believes what authority tells her – liars wouldn’t get positions of authority, would they? I remember her anguish over a suicide bombing in Israel, a deep from inside cry of “what kind of monsters would attack place with kids in it?”. Never once thinking of the order-of-magnitude greater number of children dying from Israeli attacks in the west bank at the time. That’s just propaganda, I’m sure she was thinking. Maybe “they broguht that on themselves”, but I doubt even that.

There was a week I had really high hopes for her. She took a trip to Africa with Bono and a bunch of other reporters. You could start to see some of the real world cracking through her mindset.

But by the next Oscars season, it was all gone. My, how her eyes sparkled at covering the entertainment industry.

I’m not surprised by this at all. I don’t think she’s emotionally ready for seeing all the real world horror.I think she has been badly disillusioned by her Limbaugh relationship and the exposure of Nixonian government. I think she really does want to cover “good” news – not for propaganda, but because she desperately needs it for the sake of her sanity. I bet she even pitched the idea for her own “good news” show around the news industry and got laughed out of corner offices – yeah, that should capture the 1 am timeslot: unless there is a good infomercial on.

I wish her well, and hope she finds her peace with it. And that someone with a sense of color gets hold of her website.

“Maybe CNN will replace her with Melissa Theuriau:”

Marie Jon.

You know you want it.

“The world is a good place.” Wow. How unfortunate that the world has had to wait so many centuries for someone with Daryn Kagan’s depth and courage to come along and defend this radical thesis.

I swear: all by themselves, some people in the media are walking, talking arguments for the nonexistence of God.

Rush? Viagra and Oxycontin Rush? I suppose this explains why Daryn thinks this is a “radical” idea….

I never want to lose Marie Jon. Her home should always be S,N!

In fact, you ought to give her guest posting rights.

Wow. The graphics of “Rhoda” teamed with the sensibility of “Mary Tyler Moore.”

That website: yuck. Lileks will be putting it in his next book.

ooh

In fact, you ought to give her guest posting rights.

TC that is an awesome idea

I love the slimy effort at pre-emption, which she probably learned from her ex. If you dislike her site, you think the world isn’t “a good place.” You liberals–why do you hate the world? Why do you hate goodness? Why do you hate the good-placeness of the world?

You liberals–why do you hate the world? Why do you hate goodness? Why do you hate the good-placeness of the world?

Hmmm…perhaps because the world, as we humans have set it up, is small bits of goodness–say, the Berlioz Symphonie Fantastique that I’m listening the Scottish National Orchestra play to via BBC Radio 3–interspersed with large, heaping dollops of loneliness, doubt, pain, suffering and misery? That, NOW, of all times in recent history, with what’s going on in the Middle East, is a really piss-poor time to start babbling about the good-placeness of the world? (love that, good-placeness) *

Or would that harsh her mellow? I mean, for fuck’s sake, I’m proud to say I’m a hippie in outlook but even *I* don’t get that disconnected from reality and utter such touchy-feely bullshit as that website spews.

*I know you’re mocking her, as I am

Wow. The graphics of “Rhoda� teamed with the sensibility of “Mary Tyler Moore.�

Dammit, I almost went with the Rhoda reference before succumbing to the Match Game. But that combo nails it.

“Launching in 15 weeks”

Until then, the world is still a shit place.

Fortunately, if there’s one thing that can turn a sickeningly sunny, naive, optimist who thinks the world is a “great place” into a self-hating, miserable, ranting lunatic, it’s the Internet. This should be fun to watch.

First Edward R. Murrow, then Walter Cronkite, now Daryn Kagan. Another paragon of journalistic virtue leaves the airwaves to start an inspirational website.

We will miss you, Ms. Kagan. Good luck and Godspeed. And see if Rush can spare any oxycontin, my pilodinal cyst is killing me something fierce over here.

———————–

Bills vs. Oilers
NFL’s greatest comeback

Update: It is perhaps designed to appeal to women.

Not this woman. Nonetheless, I’m betting there’s a Very Special Lifetime movie script with her name all over it when this website goes under. She may have to slapfight Meredith Baxter for it, but by then she’ll want it more.

“Maybe CNN will replace her with Melissa Theuriau:�

Marie Jon.

That’s Marie Jon’, buddy. And don’t you forget it.

No, you don’t get it yet. The real plan is to create a kind of internets version of “The View”. She’ll get Pamela shrugs, Marie Jon’, Cynthia McKinney and Deb Frisch. They’ll sit around and blog about issues, interview interesting people and offer opinions on everything from proper christian makeup and clothes to the effectiveness of artillery in counter-insurgency operations. All ending in a group hug…

mikey

as soon as I saw that website, I wanted cheese and juice…but not the kind I have, or the kind you’re thinking of.

My head is temporarily spinning . . . as far as Kagan’s replacement, I don’t know whether I’d be more entertained by the Gallic tres-hotness of Melissa Theuriau or the sheer grammatic chaos of Marie Jon’. Why not bring back “Crossfire” and put the two of them on it.

MELISSA: Pensez-vous que Rumsfeld a dirigé cette guerre correctement?

MARIE: And from, the right,, I am Marie Jon’!

What do you think, sirs?

I can never, ever, ever look at Daryn Kagan without stopping to think that she has touched Rush Limbaugh’s penis.

Tell me I’m not the only one.

Jillian-

I just threw up in my mouth. A lot.

I can never, ever, ever look at Daryn Kagan without stopping to think that she has touched Rush Limbaugh’s penis.

If it’s any consolation, she was probably wearing rubber gloves.

Dr. Bloor, who’s idea were the rubber gloves, anyway?

Oh, Jesus Tapdancing Christ. >

But, don’t you all see? That ‘ll be one of the Great* recurring features on Daryn’s website:

“SEX TIPS FOR DEALING WITH THE OXYCONTIN AND VIAGRA INFLATED LOVER by Daryn Kagen”
“Part 5: Utilizing the keg of vaseline”

Accompanied by “tasteful” pix of a beached Rushbo, Gannon-style, glistening and quivering.

*great for causing projectile vomiting.

“SEX TIPS FOR DEALING WITH THE OXYCONTIN AND VIAGRA INFLATED LOVER by Daryn Kagen�

That should probably read “Oxycontin deflated and Viagra inflated.” Hadn’t really thought about him combining the two together before–he must have been popping up and down like the automatic pilot in Airplane.

I can never, ever, ever look at Daryn Kagan without stopping to think that she has touched Rush Limbaugh’s penis.

That presumes she was able to find it.

Accompanied by “tasteful� pix of a beached Rushbo, Gannon-style, glistening and quivering.

Crap, thanks a lot.

Now I can’t stop throwing up.

I’m going to take up heroin to drive THAT image out of my mind.

‘glistening and quivering’ BLECCCH.

Eeeeeeu-yew. Her website borrows handsomely from the color scheme of the now-defunct Pacific Southwest Airlines, known to us who had to fly it as PSA. (Back in the early ’70s, a ticket from LA to Oakland cost $16.75.) If you’ve seen “Almost Famous,” the Cameron Crowe character’s older sister runs away from home to become a stewardess on PSA, which required female staffers to wear hot pants and a helmet shaped like a penis head. It’s all there in the movie…

Accompanied by “tasteful� pix of a beached Rushbo, Gannon-style, glistening and quivering.
Thank you, Marq. Throwing up blood now. That can’t be good.

Accompanied by “tasteful pix of a beached Rushbo, Gannon-style, glistening and quivering.

C’mon, kiddies! How often does one get the opportunity to use the words “tumescence,” “magnifying glass” and “Cuban cigars” in the same sentence?

White Power!! LOL This crap reminds me of this skank who went to school with me named Jamie Wilksinon at Port St Lucie High School. Her brother is Steve Wilkinson. I thinkkk you remember. He was another wanna-be fake skin but anyhow. His sister ran her mouth all the time and finally someone jumped her at IRCC in Fort Pierce. I thought it was funny because she swore up and down she was a skin when she needed help but nobody believed her. She use to smell so bad like rotten fish or something. Anyhow white power bittches!!! Florida will be white again.